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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 This programme contains some strong language and adult humour. 2 00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:09,120 Hello, I'm Kimberly Wyatt, 3 00:00:09,120 --> 00:00:11,280 most known for being a judge on Got To Dance, 4 00:00:11,280 --> 00:00:12,880 or a high-kicking Pussycat Doll, 5 00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:15,800 but today, I'm going to star in my own cop drama. 6 00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:17,760 All I know is, there's been a homicide. 7 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:19,160 I don't know who the victim is, 8 00:00:19,160 --> 00:00:21,440 I don't know who the suspects are going to be. 9 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:23,160 I don't know what's going to happen. 10 00:00:23,160 --> 00:00:26,600 So, wish me luck as I try and solve a murder in Successville. 11 00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:36,760 'Welcome to Successville, a town full of celebrities. 12 00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:40,320 'Sometimes the famous faces who live here break the law, 13 00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:42,800 'and when they do, I'm here to take them down. 14 00:00:44,760 --> 00:00:48,640 'I'm DI Sleet - and this is my voice you're hearing. 15 00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:52,320 'You'd only usually hear it if you've been arrested, murdered 16 00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:56,000 'or if you work for a hotline for the depressed and lonely. 17 00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:57,440 'Hello, Tracey - me again. 18 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:06,160 'It was my first day back at work 19 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:08,320 'after a serious case of the Plumptons. 20 00:01:08,320 --> 00:01:10,640 'And my dung hole was killing me.' 21 00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:12,240 Ooh. 22 00:01:12,240 --> 00:01:14,440 Very nice. 23 00:01:14,440 --> 00:01:15,880 Come to Mummy. 24 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:18,600 Oi, Sleet! 25 00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:21,360 Oh, my God, it's like the Taj Mahal in here! 26 00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:24,120 It's just a little assortment - some breakfast, sir. 27 00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:25,520 Where the hell have you been?! 28 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:27,320 I've been calling you for two days! 29 00:01:27,320 --> 00:01:29,680 I took the liberty of having a few days off, sir. 30 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:32,000 - What?! - I went through all the appropriate channels. 31 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:34,280 A holiday?! What did you do? You've got no friends. 32 00:01:34,280 --> 00:01:35,400 It wasn't a holiday, sir, 33 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:37,720 it was actually quite a serious medical procedure... 34 00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:40,560 I don't care, Sleet, I've got you a new rookie. Yes. 35 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:41,960 Oh, that's the last thing I need, 36 00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:44,520 a sweaty little oik who doesn't know his dick from his balls. 37 00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:46,840 "He" is a "she", Sleet. 38 00:01:46,840 --> 00:01:48,320 - Get with the times, yes? - Yeah. 39 00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:50,640 - Kimberly? - Hi. - Hi, come in, how are you? 40 00:01:50,640 --> 00:01:54,080 - Yes, good thanks. - Great to see you. - LAUGHTER 41 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:55,400 It's good to see you too. Hi. 42 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:58,000 This is um, this is DI Sleet. 43 00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:00,320 Treat her with kid gloves, yes? 44 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:02,960 - I'll leave you to get to know each other. - Thank you. 45 00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:04,760 SLEET SIGHS 46 00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:05,960 - Hello. - Hello. 47 00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:09,840 Oh, so... DI Sleet. 48 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:12,800 - Your name is...? - Kimberly, Kimberly Wyatt. 49 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,960 Take a chair. 50 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:17,120 SLEET GROANS 51 00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:24,160 So I noticed a little twang to your accent. What are you - Dutch, Welsh? 52 00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:25,720 - American. - American? 53 00:02:25,720 --> 00:02:29,360 - Yeah. - Wow. Well, I never, that's pretty impressive. 54 00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:31,040 - Is it? - Have you always been American? 55 00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:32,760 Yeah, since the day I was born. 56 00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:35,760 I used to have an old partner, you know? 57 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:37,560 Yeah, she was like you. 58 00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:40,800 She was just like you - a sweet, sweet pretty thing. 59 00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:43,640 - Mm-hmm. - Blonde and bouncy, reliable and friendly. 60 00:02:43,640 --> 00:02:45,200 With a big wet nose. 61 00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:46,440 Old Bonnie. 62 00:02:46,440 --> 00:02:48,360 Are you referring to me as a dog? 63 00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:50,720 No, no, I'm referring to you as a brilliant partner. 64 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:52,960 This was the best officer I ever worked with. 65 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:55,480 - Man's best friend. - Do you know what happened to Bonnie? 66 00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:57,000 What happened to Bonnie? 67 00:02:57,000 --> 00:03:01,120 We got sent on a mission to Colombia, take down a big cartel. 68 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:03,200 She went undercover as an Alsatian. 69 00:03:04,880 --> 00:03:08,440 I sprained my ankle pretty badly. Bonnie went in alone. 70 00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:10,320 They shot her? 71 00:03:10,320 --> 00:03:11,840 Yes, they shot her. 72 00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:14,560 Oi, big boy, try pulling your dick out of your arsehole, yes? 73 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:17,320 Ah, sir, there's a lady here, can you please watch your language? 74 00:03:17,320 --> 00:03:19,920 Fuck off! Sorry. Is that Bonnie? 75 00:03:19,920 --> 00:03:21,680 Yeah, it is sir, it's sweet Bonnie. 76 00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:26,080 I would like you to get down to forensics 77 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:27,640 as quick as possible please, Sleet. 78 00:03:27,640 --> 00:03:30,440 There's been a murder - Dr Wayne Rooney. 79 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:31,960 - Yes. - Well. 80 00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:35,280 Looks like the pheasant's come home to roost. 81 00:03:35,280 --> 00:03:37,480 - You ready to go and solve a crime? - I'm ready. 82 00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:40,840 - Come on. Oh, grab my cushion and, er, my deodorant. - OK. 83 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:45,080 There we go. 84 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:51,600 'Time to see pathologist, Lana Del Rey. 85 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,080 'She was a sweet kid, 86 00:03:53,080 --> 00:03:57,200 'but about as sociable as a North Korean traffic warden.' 87 00:03:57,200 --> 00:03:59,280 Ha, well, ha-ha, hello. 88 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:02,320 It's good of you to show up. You were meant to be here an hour ago. 89 00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:03,800 Yes, sorry about that. 90 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:05,760 Hey, why don't you open the curtains in here, 91 00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:08,200 or have the moths sewn them shut? 92 00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:11,880 So you can't open them any more? 93 00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:15,560 That's why it's so dark and...dingy in here. 94 00:04:18,480 --> 00:04:22,040 Just... I'm having a joke with you, just trying to create a vibe. 95 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:25,840 I'm a little too busy for your humour, Sleet. 96 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:30,120 Do you want to have the honour? 97 00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:33,040 Ah ha, sure. I'd love the honour. 98 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:42,480 Get right in there. 99 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:48,120 Is there a reason why you've got my victim 100 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:50,840 all wrapped up like a chicken shawarma? 101 00:04:50,840 --> 00:04:52,600 Oh, it's beautiful, isn't it? 102 00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:54,080 Oh, uh-huh. 103 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:56,480 He was like this when they found him. 104 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:58,320 Quite a remarkable death. 105 00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:00,560 - Yeah, it's... - I rather envy him. 106 00:05:02,040 --> 00:05:03,320 Look at it. 107 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:05,880 Well, I think that's a bit weird and creepy. 108 00:05:05,880 --> 00:05:08,760 - Kimberly, have you got some questions you wanted to ask? - Yep. 109 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:15,560 Um, how did Dr Wayne Rooney die? 110 00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:18,880 He seems to have died from asphyxiation. 111 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:20,680 Very interesting. 112 00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:24,160 Whoever did this used their hands and worked very quickly. 113 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,920 You know, I wouldn't bet against our murderer 114 00:05:27,920 --> 00:05:31,200 having some kind of, um, RSI. 115 00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:34,680 RSI? That's some sort of bank savings thing, right? 116 00:05:36,880 --> 00:05:39,040 It's Repetitive Strain Injury. 117 00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:43,640 Dr Rooney was found performing an onanistic convenience transaction. 118 00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:46,000 Can you say that in English, please? 119 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,880 Yeah, English, please. 120 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:50,080 He was masturbating in the toilets. 121 00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:52,200 What? Um, Kimberly, can you just... 122 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:55,360 For a second, just cover your ears, please. 123 00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:59,440 Can you die from that? Can you... Can you die from that? 124 00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:01,600 Is that actually something that can kill you? 125 00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:02,920 Can it...? 126 00:06:02,920 --> 00:06:05,520 Don't look, close... Can you die from this? 127 00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:06,920 No. 128 00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:08,080 - No? - No. 129 00:06:08,080 --> 00:06:11,640 But if somebody I knew was doing it, three or four times a day... 130 00:06:12,840 --> 00:06:15,200 Hey! Pussy-Puss, you're not meant to have heard it. 131 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:17,160 - Don't write any of that down. - Right. 132 00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:20,720 I guess we'd better hot-tail it down to the hospital 133 00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:22,520 and try and solve this thing. 134 00:06:22,520 --> 00:06:24,360 Lana, we'll see you soon. 135 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:25,680 - Bye, Lana. - Yeah. 136 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:28,520 Do you think you'll see her again, 137 00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:30,400 maybe go out for a coffee or something? 138 00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:31,560 I hope not. 139 00:06:34,920 --> 00:06:38,120 'Three suspects were in the vicinity at the time of the murder. 140 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:41,240 'First up, Nurse Adele, Rooney's lady-friend. 141 00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:43,880 'Most murders are committed by a loved one, 142 00:06:43,880 --> 00:06:46,440 'which makes me indestructible. 143 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:47,480 'Hmm.' 144 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:50,360 Don't you worry, now listen darling, try not to move too much, 145 00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:52,320 because these bandages will fall off 146 00:06:52,320 --> 00:06:54,760 and you'll most likely get a very fatal disease. 147 00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:56,240 All right? Tickle tickle! 148 00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:57,800 SLEET WHISTLES 149 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:59,360 Oh, hello. 150 00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:02,360 How can I help you merry souls on this fine day? 151 00:07:02,360 --> 00:07:05,560 Well, I'm DI Sleet, Successville Homicide. 152 00:07:05,560 --> 00:07:07,200 Oh, where are my manners? 153 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:09,520 This is my new partner, Kimberly Wyatt. 154 00:07:09,520 --> 00:07:12,800 - Lovely to meet you. - By partner, I mean, partner just at work. 155 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:14,520 Colleagues, not anything else. 156 00:07:14,520 --> 00:07:17,280 We aren't sleeping together, we're not even really friends. 157 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:19,120 We're just working together and... 158 00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:21,640 Not that I hold anything against or think less of people 159 00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:23,880 who do have sex with work friends, er, like you... 160 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:26,600 'Ere, he's all fingers and thumbs, isn't he, eh? 161 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:28,800 I hope he's not like that in the bedroom! Ha-ha! 162 00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:31,760 - Ha-ha, she wouldn't know, as I said. We've never... - No, no, of course. 163 00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:34,720 We haven't, she will never find out, unless she's open-minded and... 164 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:37,840 Now, listen, what can I help you with today? Come on, what are you here for? 165 00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:40,120 Well, we're just stopping by, my sweet buttercup, 166 00:07:40,120 --> 00:07:43,840 just to um... have a general chat really, about Dr Wayne Rooney. 167 00:07:43,840 --> 00:07:47,440 Oh, I could chat about him all day. 168 00:07:47,440 --> 00:07:51,080 He's the love of my life, the man of my dreams, the one and only. 169 00:07:51,080 --> 00:07:54,160 We've just got a puppy and we've called him Adeleayne, 170 00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:57,560 which is like an amalgamation of both of our names. 171 00:07:57,560 --> 00:08:00,680 'Ere, he's all right, isn't he? 172 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:03,720 Don't worry, Buttercup, he is absolutely fine. 173 00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:07,040 He's never been better. He's in great health. 174 00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:09,560 Er, can you give me five minutes... or seconds, actually. 175 00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:12,080 Probably won't even be a minute, could be even 30 seconds. 176 00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:14,080 Just need to talk to Kimberly about something. 177 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:15,920 It's police work, don't worry about it. 178 00:08:15,920 --> 00:08:18,400 Ain't you funny? Course you can, Mr Bungerly-Wungerly. 179 00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:21,160 LAUGHTER 180 00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:25,080 Listen, um... Well, this is proving to be quite difficult. 181 00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:26,600 She's quite a hard nut to crack. 182 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,880 - Sleet, you lied to her. - I didn't lie to her. 183 00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:31,600 - You did. - I didn't tell her the truth, but I didn't lie. 184 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:34,240 - Hmm... - I just haven't said anything about it at the moment. 185 00:08:34,240 --> 00:08:35,680 Hmm. 186 00:08:35,680 --> 00:08:40,760 Listen, you need to tell Nurse Adele that Dr Wayne Rooney is... 187 00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:45,320 - Dead? - No. Don't you dare say that word. 188 00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:47,560 - Strictly prohibited within the police. - Why? 189 00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:50,200 We're not allowed to say it any more, people freak the hell out. 190 00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:52,760 - I'm going to have a look around for some evidence. - OK. 191 00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:57,040 - Listen, the main thing is, just enjoy yourself. - OK. 192 00:08:57,040 --> 00:08:58,680 - OK? - All right. 193 00:08:58,680 --> 00:09:00,320 - See you in... - Thanks, Sleet! 194 00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:04,640 There was definitely something about pavements in it, 195 00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:07,160 but I just can't remember now, isn't that funny, eh? 196 00:09:07,160 --> 00:09:09,880 Fun, eh? Going to be all right, ain't you? 197 00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,400 Nurse Adele? 198 00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:13,760 Oh, hello, Kimberly, love, how are you? 199 00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:16,000 I don't have the best of news to share with you. 200 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:17,560 Oh, are you not enjoying your job? 201 00:09:17,560 --> 00:09:21,240 Well, there's part of my job that I don't really enjoy doing, 202 00:09:21,240 --> 00:09:23,920 - that I've never really done before. - Oh, we all have those bits. 203 00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:26,240 Sometimes he shits himself and I've got to clean it up. 204 00:09:26,240 --> 00:09:29,160 You know, we've all got those bits that we don't like doing, you know? 205 00:09:29,160 --> 00:09:31,360 But sometimes, you've got to clean the shit up. 206 00:09:31,360 --> 00:09:33,000 So, Dr Wayne Rooney... 207 00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:37,560 Oh, you know, my heart goes fluttery every time you say his name. 208 00:09:37,560 --> 00:09:40,400 I don't think you'll... You won't be seeing him again. 209 00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:42,840 He's no longer with us. 210 00:09:42,840 --> 00:09:46,000 Kimberly, what are you trying to say, darling? 211 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:49,080 If you were married, you would be a widow. 212 00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:51,600 Sorry, this is confusing me a little bit. 213 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:54,040 I'm saying that he's...he's passed. 214 00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:56,800 But I don't understand quite what you're trying to tell me. 215 00:09:56,800 --> 00:09:59,320 - I'm trying to say that... - Spit it out. 216 00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:01,080 You won't be seeing him again. 217 00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:02,840 Are you trying to tell... Wuh... 218 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,800 You... Wuh... 219 00:10:06,960 --> 00:10:08,880 Ah... Ah... 220 00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:14,000 Are you trying...? Wuh... Are you trying to say...? 221 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:16,040 Are you trying to tell me...? Ah! 222 00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:17,320 Hmm. 223 00:10:17,320 --> 00:10:21,120 Is that what's... Wuh! Is that what's going on, Kimberly? 224 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:23,440 - Are you telling me...? - Yes, no... 225 00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:25,280 ..that my Wayne is dead? 226 00:10:25,280 --> 00:10:27,960 ADELE BLEATS AND CRIES 227 00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:31,960 I'm going to fall over, Kimberly. Why are you laughing, Kimberly?! 228 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:34,680 - I'm not laughing. - Did you...? 229 00:10:34,680 --> 00:10:37,480 ADELE SOBS 230 00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:46,960 Oh, Kimberly, it hurts so much! 231 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:49,600 ADELE BLEATS KIMBERLEY LAUGHS 232 00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:54,400 Argh, Kimberly, you're going to have to hold me! 233 00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:57,400 I don't know how to cope with it. 234 00:10:57,400 --> 00:11:00,320 - Wah! - Hey, hey, what the hell is going on here?! 235 00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:03,080 Hey, hey, hey, what did you say? What did you say to her? 236 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:06,480 I told her what you told me to say without saying it. 237 00:11:06,480 --> 00:11:08,960 From what I can see, you've... Did you say the word "dead"? 238 00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:10,680 - No. - Tell me, did you say the word "dead"? 239 00:11:10,680 --> 00:11:13,240 - I didn't say the word "dead"! - Was the word "dead" mentioned? 240 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:16,160 - No! - Did anyone say "dead" in here? - She, she said "dead". I didn't... 241 00:11:16,160 --> 00:11:19,720 Well done! Looks like I'm going to have to clear this dog shit up. 242 00:11:19,720 --> 00:11:22,080 - ADELE GURGLES AND CRIES - Hey, hey, get up, up! 243 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:24,840 - I don't think that's the way to... - Get up. Get off, get off me! 244 00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:27,880 - Get off me! - No, don't! - Get off me! Up, get up! Get up! 245 00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:30,320 Get up! Get up now! Up. 246 00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:32,280 What kind of animal are you? 247 00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:34,600 I'm not here to play "guess the animal", 248 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:36,680 although it is a really fun game to play... 249 00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:40,560 Listen, I'm here to solve a murder case - 250 00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:45,680 a murder that I think was committed by a cranky, weird witch. 251 00:11:45,680 --> 00:11:47,840 I'm talking about you, by the way. 252 00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:51,000 Look what I found. Wait till you read this, her diary. 253 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:52,360 Read. 254 00:11:52,360 --> 00:11:56,160 "I love Dr Rooney so much, I could squeeze him to death." 255 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:58,840 "Squeeze him to death." Sound like murder talk, Wyatt? 256 00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:00,640 Sounds like murder talk. 257 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:01,920 You were my friend. 258 00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:05,000 We've never met before. 259 00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:07,320 You going to arrest me, or what? 260 00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:09,240 - Well, we... - We don't have any evidence... 261 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:10,720 We can't actually arrest you. 262 00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:14,720 We were hoping that if we sort of went pretty tough on you and... 263 00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:16,800 Well, when you got really upset, 264 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:18,880 you might just confess to the whole thing. 265 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:20,280 Get out! 266 00:12:20,280 --> 00:12:22,000 I think she wants us to leave. 267 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,400 - Get out! - Well, yeah, well... Better be off. 268 00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:27,720 Um, I hope you get well soon. Um... 269 00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:31,360 - Yeah. - Shall we go? 270 00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:34,960 Well, this went a lot better than I thought it would. 271 00:12:36,280 --> 00:12:38,520 'Time to kill two birds with one break. 272 00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:42,960 'Dr Obama was my friend, my bum doctor and a suspect in the case. 273 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:44,960 'Hey, that's three birds!' 274 00:12:44,960 --> 00:12:46,080 KNOCKS AT DOOR 275 00:12:46,080 --> 00:12:48,120 Oh, er... Do come in. Come in, please. 276 00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:53,720 Come in, Kimberly. Go on, we're all grown-ups here. 277 00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:57,040 - Are you OK there? - Yes, I'm fine, this is Dr Obama. 278 00:12:57,040 --> 00:12:59,760 He's just having a quick look at my arsehole. 279 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:02,240 - Hmm. - So, yeah. Just giving it a little check out. 280 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:03,960 He's a dear, dear friend of mine. 281 00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:05,520 Sadly, your er... 282 00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:09,400 Your name has come up in the case that we are researching, 283 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:12,360 - a murder case. - Oh. - Yes, yes. - And I'm afraid I...! Eh! 284 00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:14,800 I have to ask you a couple of routine questions. 285 00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:17,280 Hey, that's OK, buddy. I'm happy to help. 286 00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,800 Um, Kimberly, would you mind asking the...questions? 287 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:22,800 - Um, Dr Obama... - Yeah? 288 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:26,040 When was the last time you saw Dr Wayne Rooney? 289 00:13:26,040 --> 00:13:30,440 Um, I'm not quite sure. A few... A few days ago. 290 00:13:30,440 --> 00:13:32,200 - A few days ago? - Yeah. 291 00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:34,360 Argh! Dig a little deeper. 292 00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:37,840 SLEET SCREAMS 293 00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:41,160 - Deep enough? - I was talking to Kimberly. - Oh! Sorry, big man. 294 00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:42,320 Is it painful? 295 00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:44,640 Yeah, he's got his fingers right up my arse. 296 00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:46,320 This is disgusting. 297 00:13:46,320 --> 00:13:48,160 Please, continue, Kimberly. 298 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:52,440 Er... Dr Obama, what was your relationship to the victim? 299 00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:56,760 Well, I wouldn't call it a relationship. Not like this. 300 00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:59,160 You know, I employed him. 301 00:13:59,160 --> 00:14:02,320 In fact, he was one of the worst doctors this hospital has ever seen. 302 00:14:02,320 --> 00:14:07,480 - So I always tended to give him... - SLEET MOANS 303 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,680 A wide berth. 304 00:14:08,680 --> 00:14:10,200 Ugh! 305 00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:11,400 Uh... 306 00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:15,640 This is a little awkward, Sleet. 307 00:14:15,640 --> 00:14:17,920 I'm sorry, is there any more questions before...? 308 00:14:17,920 --> 00:14:19,520 There's one more. 309 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:22,480 Dr Obama, do you have a murderous grudge against Dr Wayne Rooney? 310 00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:24,480 SLEET SCREAMS 311 00:14:24,480 --> 00:14:26,640 What the hell is going on here, Sleet?! 312 00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:28,560 Jesus! It was her words, not mine. 313 00:14:28,560 --> 00:14:31,840 - Now put your clothes on, we're done here. - Oh, dear. 314 00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:33,080 Goddammit! 315 00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:34,360 Listen, Obama... 316 00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:39,560 ..a man's lying dead and rumours around the Met are 317 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:42,560 you had beef with him. Real beef. 318 00:14:42,560 --> 00:14:46,760 That goddamn son of a bitch held this hospital back every day. 319 00:14:46,760 --> 00:14:48,320 That's right, every day! 320 00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:51,120 You know, if you want something done around here, 321 00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:52,600 you have to do it yourself. 322 00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,760 - Well, OK. - Now, get the hell out of my office! 323 00:14:54,760 --> 00:14:57,160 Kimberly, my golf clubs, please. Get them. 324 00:14:57,160 --> 00:14:58,360 Yeah. 325 00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:01,600 Not the bag, the bag's his. 326 00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:02,720 Just the clubs. 327 00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:08,440 - All of them? - That's right, take that shit! 328 00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:10,000 No, not the bag, just... 329 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,120 Kimberly, stop playing around. 330 00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:13,600 Be careful with the bag, now. 331 00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:15,520 Make as much of a mess of the bag as you want to. 332 00:15:15,520 --> 00:15:18,520 - You touch that bag... - Hey, hey, hey! You leave her alone! 333 00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:21,880 My arse is the last thing you'll be touching today. 334 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:25,880 But you're going somewhere where everyone touches arses. 335 00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:27,520 You're going to prison. 336 00:15:27,520 --> 00:15:30,240 That's where your arse-fingering skills will come into play, 337 00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:32,360 when you're fingering your cell mates... 338 00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:33,800 What are you doing?! 339 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:35,240 OK, this is distracting! 340 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:38,120 Yeah, it's distracting to us both. Wyatt, stop being so silly. 341 00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:39,640 KIMBERLEY GIGGLES 342 00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:41,640 Come on, they're golf clubs, goddammit! 343 00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:45,720 Kimberly, Kimberly, also grab my book about fine French cheeses, 344 00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:47,800 and wines and other French stuff. 345 00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:49,800 Yeah, take that shit! I never liked it anyway! 346 00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:52,920 - Oh, really?! - No. - Well, I brought... I searched for ages for that book! 347 00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:56,440 - Well, it didn't have no pictures on it. - No? 348 00:15:56,440 --> 00:15:59,160 - It only had words, and I don't read. - Oh, I'm sorry, Doctor! 349 00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:03,320 I assumed that you had a higher IQ than a buffoon. 350 00:16:03,320 --> 00:16:06,520 No, if you're going to buy me a book, buy me a book with pictures, Goddammit! 351 00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:09,120 Well, if I was still your friend and I didn't hate your guts, 352 00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:11,600 I'd buy you a book with b... Words and pictures. 353 00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:14,760 Well, it's a good thing you can't get the words out of your mouth right now! 354 00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:17,960 - Well, you know what I can get out of my mouth? - What's that? - KIMBERLY LAUGHS 355 00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:20,560 - That, spit. There, I spat on your floor. - You spat on my floor?! 356 00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:24,160 - Yeah, I spat right on your... - You spat on my floor! I dare you to spit on the floor again! 357 00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:26,520 Well, I'm not going to do it now, because want me to do it. 358 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:29,800 - Spit on the floor! - I'm not going to do it because you want... - Spit on the floor! 359 00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:31,960 Spit on the floor! Look, I just spat on the floor! 360 00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:34,760 - Yeah, I did it, too. - I've just spat on the floor! - Yeah, we both spat. 361 00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:37,440 It's my floor! If anyone's going to spit on my floor, it's me! 362 00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:39,720 - Well, OK. - Goddammit! - Why don't you spit on the floor? 363 00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:42,040 - Spit on the floor! - Spit on the floor! - Spit on the floor! 364 00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:44,240 - Spit on the floor, Wyatt! - Spit on the Goddamn floor! 365 00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,360 - Wyatt, on the floor! - Right there, right there! 366 00:16:46,360 --> 00:16:49,520 - KIMBERLY LAUGHS Pft... - Sleet, that's pathetic! - Yeah? 367 00:16:49,520 --> 00:16:50,640 We're out of here! 368 00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:53,200 - Yeah, get out of here! - I've seen enough! 369 00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:55,160 I have to get my clothes, get my clothes. 370 00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:57,640 Carry these, too. Good girl, good sweet girl. 371 00:16:57,640 --> 00:16:59,480 That's right. Yeah. 372 00:17:00,600 --> 00:17:03,760 - Kimberly, stop being silly. - KIMBERLY GIGGLES 373 00:17:03,760 --> 00:17:08,640 We'll see you around, when this case comes to a close! 374 00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:09,760 Get the door. 375 00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:11,520 This is really awkward now, Sleet. 376 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:13,040 Oh, yeah? 377 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:18,080 That's awkward, huh? Come on, let's go. What are you doing? 378 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:20,280 - Your mother! - Yeah, yours, your mother! 379 00:17:20,280 --> 00:17:22,400 Come on, what are you doing? Wyatt, hurry up. 380 00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:23,840 Yeah, see you around! 381 00:17:29,120 --> 00:17:32,280 - We'll see you around, Obama! - Good! Get out of here! 382 00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:36,160 Son of a bitch! 383 00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:38,720 Let's get ourselves a seat and go through what we've learnt. 384 00:17:38,720 --> 00:17:39,840 All right. 385 00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:44,000 SLEET GROANS 386 00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:45,880 You can't beat a hospital chair. 387 00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:48,720 Listen, Wyatt. 388 00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:51,640 I've spoken to the poindexters at High Tech 389 00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:53,760 and I've got these. 390 00:17:53,760 --> 00:17:59,400 It's snaps of footage from the CCTV outside the hospital toilets. 391 00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:03,320 That's almost certainly Rooney's killer. 392 00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:04,680 It's a girl. 393 00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:07,360 Yeah, or some prick in a wig. 394 00:18:07,360 --> 00:18:09,280 Mm - and a skirt. 395 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:10,840 Yeah, it's kind of weird. 396 00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:13,440 What...? 397 00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:16,160 Oh, these are just... 398 00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:19,600 just some snaps that I've got for dating. 399 00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:22,920 - Um... - I'm just putting myself back out there, back on the market. 400 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:27,320 I thought I'd take some sexy avant-garde snaps of myself. 401 00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:30,480 Wow! What does that have to do with me? 402 00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:33,040 Well, you're a girl, I believe. 403 00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:36,400 So, I was going to see if you could run your sweet eyes over them 404 00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:37,960 and see what you thought. 405 00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:39,560 Which ones really got you going? 406 00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:41,880 Well, that one's a... That one's pretty special. 407 00:18:41,880 --> 00:18:43,640 Does it leave you breathless? 408 00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,960 I don't know if "breathless" would be the word I'd use. 409 00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:47,000 Do you like it? 410 00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:50,120 Yeah. 411 00:18:50,120 --> 00:18:53,480 OK, so you think I should have that one as my dating profile? 412 00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:55,200 Yeah, do you want me to set you one up? 413 00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:56,680 I could set it up online. 414 00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:59,600 - Well...really, would you? - Yeah. - What would you say about me? 415 00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:01,680 I would say, 416 00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:05,720 "A tall dark and handsome man is looking for love." 417 00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:11,880 Ah, shall we go and try and solve a crime? 418 00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:14,280 - Yes. Let's get back to work. - Let's do it. 419 00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:15,840 SLEET GROANS 420 00:19:15,840 --> 00:19:19,040 'There was only one more person on the ward at the time of the murder - 421 00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:23,480 'eminent surgeon Bob Geldof, which left us with two questions: 422 00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:25,800 'How will we get inside the operating theatre 423 00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:28,240 'and what the heck did "eminent" mean?' 424 00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:36,960 Bingo! Meet Valerie Fannington, the new you. 425 00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:39,920 You're going to go undercover, see what you make of Geldof. 426 00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:41,280 - Mm-hmm. - You ready for this? 427 00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:43,960 - I think so. - I think we're going to have to work on your voice. 428 00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:45,920 You're meant to be a head surgeon. 429 00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:47,880 Can you do a Mary Poppins impression? 430 00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:51,240 - POSH ENGLISH ACCENT: Hello, my name is Valerie. - ..Fannington. 431 00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:53,400 - ..Fannington. - That's very good. 432 00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:54,720 Where shall I change? 433 00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:57,640 Well, not here in the corridor, because then everyone would see you. 434 00:19:57,640 --> 00:19:59,720 What about this little dark room here? 435 00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:02,480 - Yeah. - I'll watch out and make sure that no-one else sees you. 436 00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:04,360 MOCKNEY ACCENT: All right. thanks, Sleet. 437 00:20:04,360 --> 00:20:06,360 - MOCKNEY ACCENT: - Any time, milady. 438 00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:13,520 All right, where do you think the best place to start on this fella is, Dr Murray? 439 00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:16,040 Well, I always trust your opinion, of course, 440 00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:18,240 but I should say you'd go directly into... 441 00:20:18,240 --> 00:20:21,080 For Christ's sake! Did nobody teach you how to knock?! 442 00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:26,360 I do know how to knock, but I just didn't think it was necessary. 443 00:20:26,360 --> 00:20:29,760 OK, so help me on with my gloves, will you, Dr Fannington? 444 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:32,160 My hands are worth too much fucking money 445 00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:34,360 for me to be fannying about putting them on myself! 446 00:20:34,360 --> 00:20:36,000 Come on, would you hurry up there? 447 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,480 In the time that you have taken to do this, 448 00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:41,240 I could have built a water station in Africa! 449 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,560 Clear! Great, that's fantastic. 450 00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:46,920 Did you use to work in Customs? 451 00:20:46,920 --> 00:20:49,520 Have you done full body cavity searches before? 452 00:20:49,520 --> 00:20:52,320 - You see that? - Well done, Fannington. - Quick fix. - Well done. - Yeah. 453 00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:55,080 Let's do the other one, shall we? Great stuff. 454 00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:56,560 OK, Dr Murray, 455 00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:58,760 would you explain to amateur Amy here 456 00:20:58,760 --> 00:21:01,040 exactly what we're supposed to be doing to 457 00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:04,160 this worthless, bloody waste of space patient here. 458 00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:07,040 Yeah, it's actually a really tricky liver transplant, 459 00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:11,040 but er, yeah, I'm pretty confident, because Dr Geldof here 460 00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:15,040 is a formidable surgeon, which is obviously great for the patient. 461 00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:18,200 Christ! All right, would you listen to that voice? 462 00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:20,720 It's like working with a bloody washing machine! 463 00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:22,040 OK, before we start, 464 00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:25,000 we're going to have to know exactly what surgical implements we need. 465 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:26,760 So first of all, 466 00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:29,760 pass me the intramedullary kinetic bone distractor. 467 00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:35,400 OK, Dr Fannington, I don't know who the fuck you are, 468 00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:38,200 but you are certainly not a surgeon, that's for sure! 469 00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,360 I'm as much of a surgeon as you are. 470 00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:45,200 Put the scalpel down and put the kettle on! 471 00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,200 Shit's about to get detective-y. 472 00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:50,320 For God's sake, you can't just come barging in here! 473 00:21:50,320 --> 00:21:52,480 I'm about to perform a liver transplant, 474 00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:55,320 or something equally as difficult! 475 00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:57,400 I'm not here for a social visit. 476 00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,960 - Nice! - I'm here about a murder case. 477 00:21:59,960 --> 00:22:02,120 This isn't Valerie Fannington. 478 00:22:02,120 --> 00:22:05,680 This is Kimberly Wyatt - and she's no surgeon. 479 00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:07,240 And she's not even posh. 480 00:22:07,240 --> 00:22:08,640 No, that's for sure. 481 00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:10,120 Hey, let's get back to the case. 482 00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:11,680 What do you want to know, then? 483 00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:13,240 Dr Geldof, did you know that 484 00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:16,480 Dr Rooney was re-training to be a surgeon? 485 00:22:16,480 --> 00:22:18,640 Were you worried about having competition? 486 00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:20,560 BOB GELDOF LAUGHS 487 00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:23,920 Listen, there's only one head surgeon around here 488 00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:26,160 and he's in my bloody underpants. 489 00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:27,560 You've got that right! 490 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:31,200 That cretin couldn't operate a bucket of shite 491 00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:32,880 without a label on the handle. 492 00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:35,440 Hey, just watch it round the pretty lady! 493 00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:37,400 Just tell me what you want to know, 494 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:41,840 you great big bloody bulbous bloody round eejit! 495 00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:44,240 Oh, I see. 496 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:46,240 You're playing the insult card. 497 00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,160 - Mm-hmm. - Well, you see your face? 498 00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:49,760 - Mm-hmm? - It's all bent out of shape, 499 00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:52,320 like a kid's been playing with Play-Doh, 500 00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:54,640 but they don't know how to make good shapes 501 00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:56,800 and they've come up with your stupid face. 502 00:22:56,800 --> 00:23:00,440 You see that thing that on top of your... On top of your body, there? 503 00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:02,520 - Yeah, my head. - Your potato. 504 00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:05,240 - Oh, really? - That's right. Your potato. 505 00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:09,000 You look like, um.. What's it called, um...? 506 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:10,480 Mr Potato Head? 507 00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:12,120 No! Um, a prick! 508 00:23:12,120 --> 00:23:14,040 Oh, right, yeah. You know your hair? 509 00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:17,280 - Yeah. - You look like you brush your hair with a greasy old pork chop. 510 00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:20,000 - Oh, really? - You like when you've finished brushing your hair 511 00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:23,600 with the pork chop, you eat it and then you French kiss a dog. 512 00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:25,880 - You know what, you are like... - No, I'll tell you what, 513 00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:27,960 - it's my go, it's my go... - No, no, you look like... 514 00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:29,960 Because you've got that moustache on, 515 00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:32,080 you look like the bloke out of The Joy Of Sex, 516 00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:34,040 but who's put on about 13st. 517 00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:36,120 So you wouldn't get in the book any more. 518 00:23:36,120 --> 00:23:38,440 You'd be like the obese version of that. 519 00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:41,160 So, you'd look like a pair of sausages 520 00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:44,200 slamming home into another sausage. 521 00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:46,320 I actually think we should start thinking about 522 00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:48,480 continuing with the operation, 523 00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:51,080 on the basis that the anaesthetic actually works 524 00:23:51,080 --> 00:23:53,240 within a specific timeframe, 525 00:23:53,240 --> 00:23:57,280 which will create time pressure problems if we don't get started. 526 00:23:57,280 --> 00:24:01,440 Who in the name of golden hell is this boring piece of crap? 527 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,920 Er, yeah, I'm Dr Andy Murray and I'm an anaesthetist. 528 00:24:03,920 --> 00:24:06,960 - Christ almighty, what the hell?! - Basically I'm in charge of... 529 00:24:06,960 --> 00:24:09,240 Pass me... Would you pass me my cheese grater? 530 00:24:09,240 --> 00:24:11,760 Jesus Christ! Kimberly, just pinch me as hard as you can... 531 00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:13,640 ..for any given operation that can vary... 532 00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:15,800 Just so I can stay awake, keep pinching. That's it. 533 00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:20,400 - Pinch me, Kimberly. It's like he is literally pissing on my brain. - DR ANDY MURRAY DRONES ON 534 00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:22,080 God, if you listen to his voice, 535 00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:24,440 it's enough to drive a man to murder! 536 00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:26,040 Oh, really? 537 00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:27,920 Very interesting. 538 00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:30,360 It's an analogy, you eejit! 539 00:24:30,360 --> 00:24:32,320 As if I would be able to murder anybody! 540 00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:34,040 ECG BEEPS RAPIDLY 541 00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:36,360 - ECG FLATLINES - What does that mean? 542 00:24:36,360 --> 00:24:37,520 Oh, God! 543 00:24:39,360 --> 00:24:42,160 - Is he with us still? - No, the guy is... The guy is gone. 544 00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:45,320 So, if you don't mind, if you're not going to take me in, 545 00:24:45,320 --> 00:24:49,200 then would you get out and let me get on with my job? 546 00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:50,760 Yes, by all means. 547 00:24:50,760 --> 00:24:53,520 Um, you won't tell anyone we were here, will you? 548 00:24:55,320 --> 00:24:57,000 Just pretend it was an accident. 549 00:24:58,440 --> 00:25:00,640 All right, I'll deal with it. 550 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:03,960 Well, more than happy to give you this as a... 551 00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:06,240 - As a bung? - Just say that we weren't here. 552 00:25:07,240 --> 00:25:10,200 If you would. Come on, let's go, Kimberly. Ssh, quietly. 553 00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,120 'So who killed Dr Rooney? 554 00:25:13,120 --> 00:25:16,240 'Adele, Obama, Geldof? 555 00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:18,000 'Time for Kimberly to see that 556 00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:20,680 'life's not all sleep-overs and pillow fights. 557 00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:22,280 'She was a cop now. 558 00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:25,280 'We didn't sleep and we did our fighting with guns!' 559 00:25:26,480 --> 00:25:29,920 Do you think you know who killed Dr Wayne Rooney? 560 00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:31,520 I know who the murderer is. 561 00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:36,120 You need to shout out the killer into this. 562 00:25:36,120 --> 00:25:38,880 Tell them to come out with their hands high 563 00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:40,880 and say, "No funny business." 564 00:25:40,880 --> 00:25:43,120 - No funny business. - If they try any funny business, 565 00:25:43,120 --> 00:25:45,160 - you're going to have to take the shot. - OK. 566 00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:46,520 - Ready? - I'm ready. 567 00:25:47,640 --> 00:25:49,680 Would it be weird if we kissed before this? 568 00:25:49,680 --> 00:25:51,840 It would be weird. We shouldn't. No kisses. 569 00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:54,960 OK, fine. Just trying to throw it out there. Do it. 570 00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:58,880 Dr Bob Geldof, come out with your hands above your head! 571 00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:01,360 - And no funny business! - Get your gun ready. 572 00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:06,360 Steady, steady... 573 00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:09,640 - There he is. - Steady. 574 00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:12,640 Steady... 575 00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:14,640 He's going for something, take the shot! 576 00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:17,000 GUN FIRES TWICE 577 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:21,960 I've still got so much to do! 578 00:26:21,960 --> 00:26:24,280 He ain't got nothing to do but die. 579 00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:27,640 Did it. 580 00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:29,080 How do you feel? 581 00:26:29,080 --> 00:26:31,120 Well, I'm just hoping it's the right guy. 582 00:26:31,120 --> 00:26:33,160 - Ha, yeah, I'm pretty sure it is. - Really? 583 00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:35,000 Do you feel confident it's the right guy? 584 00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:37,040 - I do, I feel confident. - First killing? 585 00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:39,200 - Yeah, first killing. - Well done. 586 00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:42,080 - What's that?! What's that?! - Oh, it's the Chief. 587 00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:45,760 Who's responsible for this, please? 588 00:26:45,760 --> 00:26:47,760 One Kimberly Wyatt, sir. 589 00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:50,720 Kimberly Wyatt, why? 590 00:26:50,720 --> 00:26:52,120 Cos he's a murderer. 591 00:26:52,120 --> 00:26:54,280 - "Cos he's a murderer?" - Yes. 592 00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:57,240 What... How... Explain yourself. 593 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:00,760 - There was one particular clue, it's the RSI. - ..Syndrome. 594 00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:05,480 ..Syndrome, and er, Dr Geldof was unable to use his hands. 595 00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:07,800 He had to... I had to put his gloves on 596 00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:10,000 and he had motive, he was jealous. 597 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:12,880 So, he definitely is the murderer. 598 00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:15,840 Um, Kimberly, you've blown me away by how stupid you are. 599 00:27:15,840 --> 00:27:17,160 Oh, no. 600 00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:19,400 You just shot an innocent civilian. 601 00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:21,600 - No! - Yes, yes. 602 00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:24,920 The killer was Obama! Of course it was Obama. 603 00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:27,320 - Really? - Yes, really. 604 00:27:27,320 --> 00:27:28,720 - No way. - Why? 605 00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:32,080 You should have known, Dr Geldof wasn't injured. 606 00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:34,400 His hands were precious, because he told you... 607 00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:36,760 My hands are worth too much fucking money 608 00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:39,120 for me to be fannying about putting them on myself! 609 00:27:39,120 --> 00:27:43,760 He would never have risked them by bandaging a victim elaborately. 610 00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:46,640 You stay here and listen to this! Yes? 611 00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:47,760 I got it wrong. 612 00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:51,960 The problem was, Dr Obama, yes, had a wrist support in his office. 613 00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:54,760 You saw it. It was next to the cheese book. 614 00:27:54,760 --> 00:27:57,000 - It was. - Yes, yes, it was. - It was. 615 00:27:57,000 --> 00:28:01,360 The hospital was failing, that's why he decided to bump Rooney off, 616 00:28:01,360 --> 00:28:05,680 because Rooney was a notoriously shit surgeon, yes? 617 00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:07,920 You witnessed some CCTV footage. 618 00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:11,800 Yes? You saw what looked like a nurse going into the crime scene. 619 00:28:11,800 --> 00:28:16,680 That nurse's outfit was hanging on a stand in his office. 620 00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:20,240 - Oh, damn. - Hmm. - What have you got to say for yourself? 621 00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:21,720 I'm really upset. 622 00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:24,760 You're really upset? You're fired! Go home. 623 00:28:24,760 --> 00:28:28,240 And you, you flaccid weeble-wobble - go home, too! 624 00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:29,760 I'm sick of the sight of you. 625 00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:31,160 Why am I so weepy?! 626 00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:34,680 Uh-oh. We got it wrong. 627 00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:36,760 - Hey. - I feel bad. 628 00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:39,320 Don't you dare feel bad about it, I don't want to see you cry, 629 00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:41,720 it'll break my goddamn heart. 630 00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:45,160 - Listen, we might not be colleagues any more... - Aw. 631 00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:46,680 but we're friends, right? 632 00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:50,440 - Yeah. - Come on you, let's go and get a drink. 633 00:28:50,440 --> 00:28:53,600 - OK. - And you know, if maybe we have one drink too many 634 00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,480 and end up having sex, I won't tell your husband about it. 635 00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:58,440 - Sleet... - What? 636 00:28:58,440 --> 00:28:59,880 We won't be having sex. 637 00:28:59,880 --> 00:29:01,600 OK, fair enough. Is that definite? 638 00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:06,800 MUSIC: Go Your Own Way by Fleetwood Mac 48724

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