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1
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- Why didn't you say you love me back?
2
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- Uh... I don't know.
3
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We're j-- we're just kind of
getting to know each other,
4
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and...
5
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- Any last words
before I blow your brains out?
6
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- Don't shoot me, okay?
7
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You ain't got to do this.
8
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You ain't got to do this, man.
9
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Yeah.
10
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Just let me...
11
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- Why are you doing that?
12
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Cut it out!
13
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Stop it!
14
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You look at me when I kill you.
15
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Look at me!
16
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I know that there's nothing up there.
17
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- Ah! Shit.
18
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Ah!
19
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Ah... Ah!
20
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- Go home.
21
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I'm sure there's
a real hero somewhere
22
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in need of a goofy sidekick.
23
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Well, you're not alone...
24
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anymore.
25
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I've got you, I promise.
26
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Kevin!
27
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Focus.
28
00:02:02,977 --> 00:02:04,062
- I owe you one.
29
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It's a simple jump.
30
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Three, two, one.
31
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Yes.
32
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Hey.
33
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Hey, come on. Jordan, no.
34
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Come on, get up, get up. Jordan, no.
35
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Look at me, look at me.
36
00:02:38,346 --> 00:02:40,890
No. Don't you die, don't you die.
37
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I'm not gonna let you die.
38
00:02:43,434 --> 00:02:45,436
Come on, Jordan, you c...
39
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you can't, you can't die, not...
40
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Come on, Jordan, get up.
41
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Don't d...
42
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Jordan! Jordan!
43
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I jumped. I got over here.
44
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Jordan?
45
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I fucking jumped.
46
00:03:03,079 --> 00:03:04,622
I fucking jumped.
47
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I fucking...
48
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Breathe.
49
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Bravo. It's a wrap, everybody.
50
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Bravo.
51
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- The fuck...?
52
00:03:24,934 --> 00:03:26,060
A wrap?
53
00:03:26,144 --> 00:03:27,770
- Agent Hart!
54
00:03:27,854 --> 00:03:28,897
- Coach Ron?
55
00:03:28,980 --> 00:03:30,565
- Yeah!
56
00:03:32,233 --> 00:03:34,068
- Yeah.
- Oh, yeah.
57
00:03:34,152 --> 00:03:35,862
- The fuck is happening?
58
00:03:37,405 --> 00:03:39,782
- Hey, man, it was good working with you.
59
00:03:39,866 --> 00:03:41,826
No hard feelings, man. Sorry.
60
00:03:48,791 --> 00:03:49,918
- Hi.
61
00:03:50,001 --> 00:03:52,045
- Oh, no. Come on, Jordan.
62
00:03:52,128 --> 00:03:54,047
This was a part of it, too?
63
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- Yeah. Sorry, Kevin.
64
00:03:55,757 --> 00:03:57,300
- Jordan.
65
00:03:57,383 --> 00:03:59,594
But I really thought that I lost you.
66
00:03:59,677 --> 00:04:02,305
- Oh, Kevin.
- No...
67
00:04:02,388 --> 00:04:04,682
- Well, I guess I'm glad
that you're alive.
68
00:04:04,766 --> 00:04:07,936
- Well, movie magic.
69
00:04:09,687 --> 00:04:10,813
- Very good.
- Movie magic.
70
00:04:10,897 --> 00:04:12,065
- Very good.
71
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:16,694
- Jordan, no.
72
00:04:16,778 --> 00:04:18,863
Come on, get up, get up.
73
00:04:18,947 --> 00:04:20,949
Jordan, you can't do this. Don't die.
74
00:04:21,032 --> 00:04:22,784
Come on, Jordan, get up.
75
00:04:22,867 --> 00:04:25,787
Don't d... Jordan!
76
00:04:25,870 --> 00:04:27,997
Jordan!
77
00:04:28,081 --> 00:04:31,584
I did it, I jumped. I got over here.
78
00:04:31,668 --> 00:04:34,796
Jordan? I fucking jumped.
79
00:04:36,881 --> 00:04:39,509
I fucking jumped.
80
00:04:55,275 --> 00:04:58,027
- Well?
81
00:05:02,991 --> 00:05:06,494
- That may be the strangest movie
I've ever seen.
82
00:05:09,163 --> 00:05:14,043
So bizarre and-and... violent.
83
00:05:16,963 --> 00:05:20,508
And yet...
84
00:05:20,592 --> 00:05:23,094
authentic.
85
00:05:23,177 --> 00:05:26,806
You can't teach acting like that.
86
00:05:26,890 --> 00:05:28,182
- So you liked it?
- Like it?
87
00:05:28,266 --> 00:05:29,809
I like kidney-shaped swimming pools.
88
00:05:29,893 --> 00:05:32,228
I like reduced-fat eggnog.
89
00:05:32,312 --> 00:05:35,607
This movie, I loved.
90
00:05:35,690 --> 00:05:38,151
- He loves it.
91
00:05:38,234 --> 00:05:39,736
- How does it feel to be a leading man
92
00:05:39,819 --> 00:05:41,279
in your own action movie?
93
00:05:41,362 --> 00:05:43,406
- Wow.
- Kevin.
94
00:05:43,489 --> 00:05:46,284
Please.
- Oh, the center stage.
95
00:05:46,367 --> 00:05:47,744
Uh...
96
00:05:47,827 --> 00:05:50,538
No, stop, stop. Guys.
97
00:05:50,622 --> 00:05:53,416
Well, I learned two things.
98
00:05:53,499 --> 00:05:55,418
The first thing is that it's dangerous.
99
00:05:55,501 --> 00:05:58,421
It's dangerous as hell.
I mean, I was set on fire,
100
00:05:58,504 --> 00:06:00,048
I was hit in the head with a bat...
101
00:06:00,131 --> 00:06:01,382
punched, kicked.
102
00:06:01,466 --> 00:06:03,343
I'm really gonna be scarred.
- That was f...
103
00:06:03,426 --> 00:06:04,719
- No, I'm serious-- I don't know
104
00:06:04,802 --> 00:06:06,721
why you're laughing.
I'm being very serious.
105
00:06:06,804 --> 00:06:09,015
I'm gonna have real issues
because of this guy right here.
106
00:06:09,098 --> 00:06:10,808
- Fuck yeah!
- It's-- no...
107
00:06:10,892 --> 00:06:14,062
It's not a "fuck yeah."
It's-it's a serious thing.
108
00:06:16,064 --> 00:06:19,150
The second thing
that I learned is that, uh...
109
00:06:21,152 --> 00:06:23,780
...there's no such thing as a leading man.
110
00:06:25,406 --> 00:06:27,700
Because you're nothing
without your costars.
111
00:06:31,037 --> 00:06:34,499
And I had that in-in you guys,
so thank you-- Come on.
112
00:06:34,582 --> 00:06:36,334
Get up here. Seriously.
113
00:06:36,417 --> 00:06:37,544
Get up here.
- Buddy.
114
00:06:37,627 --> 00:06:39,379
- Take this in. Take it in with me.
115
00:06:39,462 --> 00:06:41,798
Wait, wait. Do I get top billing?
116
00:06:41,881 --> 00:06:43,174
- Yeah. You have top billing.
117
00:06:43,258 --> 00:06:45,260
- Nice. I didn't-- I forgot to ask.
118
00:06:45,343 --> 00:06:47,303
- Well, I think it's time to celebrate.
- Yes!
119
00:06:47,387 --> 00:06:48,846
- Looks like we've got a hit on our hands.
120
00:06:48,930 --> 00:06:51,140
- Claude. Congratulations.
- Yeah, yeah.
121
00:06:51,224 --> 00:06:53,226
Hey. Congratulations, everybody.
122
00:06:53,309 --> 00:06:56,688
- Ladies and gentlemen,
123
00:06:56,771 --> 00:06:58,273
we have a real treat for you today.
124
00:06:58,356 --> 00:07:00,066
- Okay-- wait, wait, wait, wait,
easy with the spoilers.
125
00:07:00,149 --> 00:07:01,734
This requires a little dramatic buildup.
126
00:07:01,818 --> 00:07:03,361
- Okay. Here it is.
127
00:07:03,444 --> 00:07:05,196
Now you know that I'm not a big fan
128
00:07:05,280 --> 00:07:07,782
of these high-budget action films.
129
00:07:07,866 --> 00:07:11,035
- Here she goes again,
with her love of fancy foreign films.
130
00:07:11,119 --> 00:07:13,037
- I have discerning taste.
This is my buildup.
131
00:07:13,121 --> 00:07:14,998
This is what you requested.
- Continue.
132
00:07:15,081 --> 00:07:17,208
- This movie
by Claude Van De Velde moved me.
133
00:07:17,292 --> 00:07:19,460
I got to say.
- It's an incredible film.
134
00:07:19,544 --> 00:07:21,337
- And...
- I've seen it 27 times.
135
00:07:21,421 --> 00:07:22,797
Team Van De Velde right here.
136
00:07:22,881 --> 00:07:24,507
- The hero of this movie
137
00:07:24,591 --> 00:07:26,509
is not the action star
that you would expect.
138
00:07:26,593 --> 00:07:29,762
The one that really saves the day.
139
00:07:29,846 --> 00:07:31,472
Well, we have him here today.
140
00:07:31,556 --> 00:07:33,600
Ladies and gentlemen...
141
00:07:33,683 --> 00:07:35,810
Sassy the Squirrel.
142
00:07:35,894 --> 00:07:37,228
- Aw, Sassy...
143
00:07:37,312 --> 00:07:38,938
- Oh, you're a lot bigger in person.
144
00:07:39,022 --> 00:07:40,982
- Oh, hell no.
9399
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