Original subtitles

- Previously on "The Real

- Previously on "The Real Housewives of New York City"...

- Everything I do with you, Tinsley, is not good.

- No! Really? I wasn't being honest and open?

- I have been trying to progress... You haven't!

- Yes, I have!

- I just think sometimes Dorinda

is, like, a little too hard on Tinsley.

- Yeah. - I think something must be

going on with Dorinda.

- I'm sure you've read it like everyone else.

- Both: Dorinda's taking a break.

- The breakup with John is sad, but I also know that

I have to do what's best for me now.

- How many drinks are we gonna have to take? Five?

- As many as you want. - She wants to [bleep] me.

- Oh, my God.

- My existence as a person has provoked her to bully me.

- Yeah, well, she's got a lot of anger towards you.

- Not only are you not value added,

you're un-value added.

- I don't really care that much about you right now

because you've been a mean person to me.

- You're invisible.

♪♪♪♪♪

- I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong.

♪♪♪♪♪

- I'm no one's accessory. I'm the whole lifestyle brand.

- I don't need to find love. I love myself.

- I may float like a butterfly, but I sting like a bitch.

- Life isn't a fairy tale,

but I'm hoping mine's the exception.

- Raise the curtain. Lower the lights.

I'm taking center stage in my life.

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hi. - Hello.

- Can I get a table for three for lunch?

- Yeah, of course. - Thank you.

Right this way. Our drinks menu.

- I wanna get an orange juice. - Orange juice?

- Yeah. - Got you.

Thank you.

Here she comes.

- Hi. - You're like a ray of sunshine

walking down the street. - Hi. [ laughs ]

How are you feeling? Are you feeling better?

- Honestly, not really. - I woke up with, like...

- Uh-oh. [ coughs ] - Like the chest,

like, feeling like I need to cough.

- I've got a sinus infection, an ear infection.

- Right.

- And bronchitis at the same time.

I'm also allergic to bullsh...,

and quite frankly, the orchard trip

was nothing but bullsh...

- I don't know where Tinsley is. - I know.

- But we'll... You know what? - Yeah, yeah.

- Let's start with appetizers or something.

Why don't we get a hamachi crudo?

You like hamachi crudo? - Sure.

- Coming right up, ladies. - Thank you.

- There you go. - [ coughs ]

- Probably got weak from having wine yesterday, too.

Poor Sonja.

- I'm like, poor Sonja? She did it to herself.

- Come on, girls. We're going.

- Look, I like crazy people. I love crazy.

- Right.

- Yesterday was just, like, bad crazy.

- Which part? - Which? Dorinda.

- I really want curly hair,

and I really wanted straight hair!

- Sonja.

- She'll do anything with a small dick...

- Ramona, even.

- The point is this... - You need a time-out.

- You...

- [ laughs ] - I'm sorry, but...

- Well, I mean, they... they have their issues, that's for sure.

♪♪♪♪♪

- So my other two girlfriends are coming...

Dorinda and Sonja,

and they're all amazed how I've slimmed down.

- Yeah? Well, I mean...

- Because of your last class, right?

- That's right, girl. All right, good to go.

- Hey, girl, hey. - Hey!

- Hey, you. This is my girl Bergen.

- What's up? - And this is my girl Dorinda.

- Nice to meet you, Dorinda. Welcome, girl.

- Go... Go light on us. We're all a little...

- She... She's gonna do... We're gonna do a lot of reps

with little weights. - Yes.

- So I gave you 2 and 3 pounds. - [ yawns ] Do you have 1 and 2?

I'm tired today. Are you tired?

- No, 'cause I didn't drink as much as you and Sonja.

- I think it was such a long day.

- We gotta start class. - Where is she?

- I don't know. Sonja's always late.

- There she is. - Okay, I'm here.

Is it over? Oh. - Hi, honey.

- Hi, honey, sweetie, come in. - Sonja, this is Bergen.

She's helped transform my body.

- What's your name? - Bergen.

- Bergen, not Birdie, okay. - Yes.

Let's go. Let's go. Start to raise your knees.

Just march. You, too. Yeah, come on.

Twist and detox that wine. Twist. Twist.

- Detox? - Detox, that's right.

- Yeah, some people drank a lot of wine yesterday.

- Did you hear any rumors? - Uh-oh.

- [ laughs ]

- I have sympathy, empathy for Dorinda

grieving over Richard... - Oh.

- ...and then dealing with the breakup,

but to come and say things to Tinsley that she says...

- Right. - "Where is this coming from?"

- There's a lot of judgment going on,

and we need to step in and help them figure it out.

- [ coughs ] I... Believe me, I totally agree.

- Hi! - Here she comes.

- Hi. - Hi.

- How you doing? - [ coughs ]

- Oh, my God. You're coughing, too?

- And... [ coughs ] - [ laughs ]

- I mean, no wonder why I'm sick.

- Do you want this orange juice?

- Yeah, I don't need to get more sick.

- Not after you. - I know, sorry.

Not after you.

I'm losing my voice. I guess I was screaming a lot yesterday.

- Yeah. - Well, I'm sorry, girls.

- I was, like, telling Luann this...

- I wanted it to be a fun... - It's not you.

You were... You were great. - I wanted to be a fun day.

- You're great.

The rest of them... Just, like, I don't know.

- Abs, butt, legs, long, eight more.

Two good. Go.

- This is like the worst punishment ever.

Don't roll back, don't roll back,

don't roll back.

Over your heads and don't cross your ankles.

And stand. You are done. Very good.

- Really, these workouts... It shouldn't even be legal.

- 'Cause it's just... - Got the blood going.

- Yeah. It just kinda gets you going.

- Bye, girls. - Bye.

- I mean, I'm out of shape.

You know, you just do what you can do.

And we can go to lunch.

- Well, I thought yesterday was beautiful.

- Beautiful. - Yes, beautiful setting.

- It's really nice.

- I think Ramona's concerned about you a little bit.

- By partying? Well, when I see you guys,

I really go off the rails.

- But you just got, like, overly friendly,

overly flirtatious. - No, you're absolutely right.

- You know what? You were... You weren't in control.

That's all. - No.

- You weren't in control of your actions.

- No.

- Because you passed the point of no return.

- You're right. You're absolutely right.

- And we love you. - No, no.

- And we want you healthy and happy.

- I have to be careful when we're out in public.

That's it. - Right.

- They're making sense. They're not just picking on me.

Normally, it's a girls' trip,

and, you know, we're perfectly safe.

But if I'm out in public, like at the orchard,

I can't do this.

- And what were you yelling at Tinsley about?

- Tinsley, whenever you try to talk to her,

she doesn't listen to you, then she feels she's not listened

and starts screaming.

- One thing I... - She has to stop screeching.

- Well, but can I tell you something?

I was thinking this whole sort of victim thing,

and "I'm this little girl" thing... it's, like, enough.

We all could be victims. - Oh, I know.

- It was a gang-up. I don't do gang-ups.

- Well, believe me, I've had issues

with all the women in the past,

but, you know, the reaction is a problem.

The reaction of being defensive and yelling is just not right.

Tinsley tends to do the wrong thing.

She screeches, which is brain-piercing,

and Dorinda just reacts with aggression

because she's annoying.

Tinsley can be very annoying.

- Honestly, I think, like, we need to talk about

what the real issue is. - What's the real issue?

- Tinsley was born into the life

that Dorinda puts on this pedestal.

- Well, she... - Meaning she can't relate...

- No, what she... - ...to being born

with a silver spoon in your mouth.

- Okay... - Guess what? I can't either.

- Okay, she was not, but it doesn't mean...

- I love Tinsley. Who gives a sh...?

- Exactly! - Exactly.

- Thank you for saying that, because I literally...

- You're an uphill battle. You're an uphill battle.

I know it's an uphill battle. - Like, all I've been doing

is trying to exactly say that. The poi is this.

Don't judge me.

- You need to stop defending yourself.

- Yeah. - And you know what?

At this point, put her in her place.

If you let people walk all over you,

and you don't make them respect you,

they're not going to.

If she stood up to Dorinda and was like,

"[bleep] you, bitch. Mind your business,"

Dorinda would be like, "No doubt. I respect that."

I think she needs to thug her out,

because that's the only way she's going to respect her.

- No, no, you scream like a child having a tantrum,

and that doesn't work. - But even you said, Luann,

you said the same thing, right? - Yes, exactly. That's...

That's it. - That's what I do!

That's just me. - She is mentally

and emotionally not as strong as she should be

for her age, that's all.

And I really feel sorry for her. I really do.

- I feel sorry for her, too, but you know,

God helps those who help themselves.

- I really wish at this point

Dorinda could just let it go with Tinsley.

I don't see Tinsley as a victim.

I see Dorinda victimizing Tinsley.

That's what I think.

I mean, it has to be very challenging

to be around us women because we are strong.

We are independent. Yes, we can say, "woe is me,"

but somehow we've surpassed all the problems.

- She's independent.

- Psychologically, she's not independent.

- I know, but you know what? - That's what I'm saying.

She's not strong. - No, she's codependent.

- She's a little old for that. It's frustrating, Ramona.

- Well, you know what? I understand you're frustrated,

but I take a step back, right? I don't know.

Someone just didn't give her the right tools.

- What about Dorinda's behavior? Why isn't anybody

holding her accountable? - Exactly.

She's the one that's doing this, and I'm reacting.

It's bullsh... - What if we do, like,

an intervention with her? - Oh, my God.

- No. - Is that not gonna happen?

- Not gonna happen. - I won't be a part of that.

- But if we frame it, you know, in a health spa

or something like that could be cool.

Put her in a padded room. [ laughter ]

Surprise. Time for your massage. - [ laughs ]

- This is gonna be totally entirely up to you, Tinsley,

but... - Are you gonna go Cardi B?

Are you gonna go Dalai Lama?

- [ laughing ] - I don't know, sweetie.

Which one is it? Cardi Lama. Go Cardi Lama.

- I'm telling you, you gotta go Dalai Lama.

Otherwise, you're gonna see Cardi B.

She's gonna gangster rap on your head,

is what she's gonna do.

- Coming up...

- This area starts getting crinkly,

like Sonja has it. Oh, my God. Sonja has all these, like,

ooh, creases here.

- You're just trying to show off your boobs right now.

- They are looking good. - They do look great.

♪♪♪♪♪

[ horn honks ]

♪♪♪♪♪

- I'm here.

- Hey. Good to see you. Welcome back.

- I almost canceled, but that's what you can't do,

and you don't wanna do it.

- That's exactly right. Come on back.

- How's it going? Let me get my water.

- Yeah.

- So... first thing that we should start with

is, I think, the thing I really recognize is

where my anger is coming from.

- Hmm. - I think it's frustration,

and even with this girl that... Tinsley... I told you about...

- Yeah. - It's frustration,

and it actually comes out wanting the person

to be their best they can.

I started with Dr. Daryl three months ago

to help me process all this stuff that is going on.

To be honest with you, it all got too much,

and I needed someone to help me,

and I'm not good at asking for help.

Maybe I'm too different right now

to tolerate how different she is.

- You can be courteous around each other.

You don't need to be at each other's throats.

Be respectable to each other's space.

You guys are each your own person,

and we don't know on the surface what the sh... is

that we're all dealing with underneath.

- That's it. - We see what we see,

but then there's the whole other world that's going on

that we don't really know.

We could say to ourselves if... - And I handled it...

I handled it poorly because I'm so internally, you know,

ah... going through something.

With the house and the breaking up with John,

it's having an effect on my personal being.

- Mm. - It's gonna be a year

this January that it's been the Great Lady went to sleep.

I call her the Great Lady. - Mm-hmm.

- Blue Stone Manor.

I had to go through something with the house

that I never allowed myself to go through

after Richard died.

You know, I had to throw away part of our life,

'cause it was underwater. - I know.

- Piles and piles and piles of our life

that I didn't even bother to go through

'cause I thought that's too painful.

'Cause not only is it... Do I have to go through it,

but it's ruined. - Right.

I can see it's... it's stirring up some emotions right now, which...

- Well... - Was it memories? Was it...

Was it about you? - I... Well, I feel like I...

[ clears throat ]

[ voice breaking ] It's making me an angry person

towards people because I was a little bit lost at sea

after Richard died, and instead of really...

...taking it on and allowing it to, you know,

be in the sea of it.

I pretended like everything was okay.

And I never really acknowledged this tremendous loss

that really stunted me...

- Yeah. - ...you know, in so many ways.

- I know. - From motherhood down,

and it's making me angry.

It just made me think about a life once had

and how probably I never really put a period on it.

And in the process of...

[ sniffles ] resurrecting this place,

I've kind of let go of a lot of things.

That probably, without knowing it...

[ sniffles ] kept me tied to the past.

- What's it gonna take to get you from here?

Do you feel like you're stuck right now 'cause...

- No, I think every week... You know what I...

Do you know what I think is gonna get me there?

And this is what I've been trying to explain to John,

is complete selfishness

and just be a little bit more mindful of myself.

- So what's... What's going on with him?

- I haven't seen him. - For how long?

- A while.

My daughter Hannah's theory is that I met John too quickly

after Richard passed.

Who knows? As I always say about the grieving process,

you do what you gotta do.

I don't regret it, and I'll always love John,

but I was in a different place when I met him,

and I'm in a different place now.

Welcome to life.

- You have to focus on what you need to do right for you

right now, and that's what you're telling me,

is that you need to have that time, that space, which is okay.

- And I gotta be honest with you,

I'm really sort of enjoying it.

There's such a relief to just worry about yourself

and no one else, like, I don't...

My life has gotten quieter, and I needed the noise

to go away, and then maybe I'll want it all again,

but I can't take the noise right now.

- I love the fact that you're honoring yourself.

- Dorinda is the nurturer. Dorinda is the one

who's always taking care of everyone else.

So I think it's great that you're finally honoring you,

and you can still take care of other people,

but you come first.

Just give yourself a high five for that

because it's... it's a huge thing.

It's a huge thing for this and for your health.

- It feels good. - Yes. Yes.

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hi. - Hi. How are you?

- Good. I have five girlfriends meeting me here.

I really want the women to have the full...

- Full experience? - ...bathhouse experience.

- Okay. - I want the hats.

I want the robes. I want, like, everything for them.

- Yes, hats are definitely... - Okay.

- To protect the beautiful hair from overheat.

- Exactly. - So here you have, like,

this hat. - Okay.

When Luann said a spa day would help the group,

I don't think she was thinking the Russian bathhouse,

but I kinda took her idea and ran with it.

Look, I thought maybe I could get the group together

to go to this place down in my neighborhood,

and that is my oasis for, like, relaxation,

detoxing, and maybe it'll help get us in a better place.

I don't know.

This is a New York iconic institution

that has so much more character

than any of the Upper East Side spas.

They should be very grateful that I'm introducing them

to this place.

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hi. - Hi.

- How are you? Welcome. - How are you? Thank you.

- Okay. - Hi.

- So you're meeting your friend, right?

- Yeah. - Okay, so put

your most valuable stuffs here like jewelry,

because it's a little bit too hot in the sauna.

You can leave some. - Uh, all this is fine.

I sleep with it. - Okay, no problem, no problem.

- It doesn't come off.

Thank you, but no thank you.

Okay, I sleep with hoops on. I-I sleep with my jewelry on.

No, you can't have it. It's mine. Sorry.

- So I have five girlfriends coming.

I just wanna order lunch for them now.

- All right. - So these are all vodkas?

- Yes, it's all different flavors.

- Oh, my God. Ginger vodka.

That sounds healthy, actually. - Yes.

- Hi. - Hi!

- How are you? - You look so cute!

- We're at the spa. - Wait, wait.

They have all Russian vodka.

- Ooh. May I have some ginger vodka right now?

- This is strong thing.

- Ooh. It's delicious.

- By the way, in Russia, we shot. We never sip. We shot.

- Okay, well, you... - Shot.

- Okay. I'm American. All right? - [ laughs ]

- Sorry. Thank you. - [ laughs ]

- I don't go downtown much. - Believe me, I'm, you know,

I'm not thrilled. - Yeah, I said there's

five reasons why I ever come down to this area.

Birth certificate... - Oh, yeah.

- Death certificates, marriage certificates,

jury duty, or going to jail.

- For me, it's parole. - [ laughs ]

- I swear to God, when you go past Canal Street,

the weather changes.

It gets grayer.

I don't come down here unless I am...

- Me, too. I... - ...I am summoned.

- So I had lunch with Leah and Tinsley.

- Oh, God. I'm sure I was the topic.

- Well, you kind of were the topic.

She's trying to figure out how to approach you

in order to, like, make things better.

Of course, Leah has her thoughts which is kind of gangster,

and I'm like...

- Yeah, well... - That's why we get along,

'cause we... - That's why you get along, so...

- We've been speaking a lot, Leah and I.

She's a great mother, which I always respect.

- Mm-hmm. - And she's been through a lot.

- Yeah. - And she's not afraid

to let... show all sides- - Speak her mind.

- Yeah. And I think about myself and Tinsley...

I don't really live in, like, a fantasy world.

♪♪♪♪♪

- Coming up...

- Oh! Well, that hurts a little. Not so hard! Not so hard!

♪♪♪♪♪

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hi. - Hello.

- Am I late or early?

- You're right on time. - Oh, I like that answer.

Right on time. Okay.

- Do you wanna put some valuables in the box?

- Let me give you my watch. - Okay.

- 'Cause I love this watch. - It's very nice.

- [ haughty voice ] Yes, Cartier, darling. Cartier.

- [ laughs ]

So the hat is you put it inside in the sauna.

- Wait a minute. I gotta wear a hat?

- When you're in the sauna, you have to protect your head.

- Oy.

The spa... it's a little rustic. It's not quite what I'm used to.

- Be careful. - Yeah, I know.

Why did I wear heels?

It kinda reflects Leah... A little rough around the edges.

[ laughs ] - Ha! Hi!

- Look at you in that hat.

- Hi! - Hi!

- How are you? - All right, let's just change.

Where do I change? - Yeah, I mean...

- Change right in here. - I don't know.

- What don't you know? - Just, I don't...

- She's, like... - I don't like my robe.

- She doesn't like flip-flops, and she doesn't like...

- I'm not... I know. I mean, I am. - Look, I just...

I'm gonna tell you that she gets a little too crazy.

She can be a little bit of a bully sometimes.

All right, anyway, let's not talk about it.

Why am I bringing up negative stuff?

Okay, goodbye. Let me get ready.

- Positive vibes only!

- Is that it? - That's it.

- Uh... wow. [ siren wailing in distance ]

- But there's a strip club down the road.

- That's a strip club. - Does that tell you anything?

[ laughs ]

- This area, just so you know,

'cause you're still a youngster...

- Yeah. - My mother never told me

about this. This starts getting crinkly.

Like, Sonja has it. Oh, my God. Sonja has all these, like, ugh,

creases here.

- Spa and restaurant. Oh, my God.

Oh, Lord.

- You're just trying to show off your boobs right now.

- They are looking good, right?

- [ laughs ] - They do look great.

- Oh, I'm rubbing some cream on my boobs.

- Let me see how I look. Yeah, I would pick up myself.

- Women's Locker Room. Okay. - Hello!

- Hey, you. - Are you excited?

- Hi. - Hi, girls.

- Are you excited? - Hi. How are you?

- I'm going to let things go the way everybody

keeps saying it, so she can go over there,

and I can go over here,

and that's how we're gonna play it.

- Give us the lowdown, Luann. What do we do?

- All right. So basically... Hey! Hi! [ laughs ]

- Is this your idea? - Yep.

- Oh, God, I should've known. - Right, because you're, like,

below 14th street? - Yes!

I said, I'm in Graffiti Land.

There's graffiti everywhere,

gates down in the middle of the day.

I mean, I avoid those areas uptown,

and that's the way it is everywhere downtown.

- So I came prepared. - Amazing.

Got my bathing suit on already.

- We're gonna go into the dry sauna,

and then we're gonna go upstairs and get...

- You're gonna be hot.

- All right, here we go.

- Ohh. - Gotta climb up.

- Ooh, it's hot. It's so hot up here.

- Whew.

- This is very bare bones. Like...

- Bare bones. - Down to earth.

Bare bones. - Wow, your boobs

look really good in that bathing suit, girl.

- This is a true story...

- Really? - 'Cause they're so soft.

Feel mine. Mine are very soft. - Oh, yeah.

- [ speaks indistinctly ] - Oh, yeah, no.

Yeah, they feel good. - Right?

- Look at this. - Look at this.

- Both: It's like a photo shoot.

[ laughter ]

- Oh, my God. - Tweedledee and Tweedledum.

- Oh, my God. I was just gonna say that.

- All right, let's go. Speaking of great boobs, let's...

- Yeah. It's just... - It's getting hot.

- It's too hot for the boobs in here.

- Oh, my God.

- Come on. Let's get the massages.

- Hannah would love this. - This is like a "hammas."

Don't you love the "hammases"?

- Oh, the hammam. Hammam. [ laughs ]

- "Hammas," hammam. [ laughs ]

- [ singsongy ] All right, who wants to go first?

- Oh, hello. - Oh. [ laughs ] We'll go.

- Sure. - Let's go together.

- Just lay down here with... - Yeah.

- How are you? - Good. How are you?

- Good. What's your... - Luann, we start...

We start like this. I know.

- Oh, hello. Let's get beaten by those leaves.

- I thought I was horny, but these women are

way more DTF than I am.

- But wait, don't get... Don't get my hair dirty.

- They really are. [ laughs ]

- Wait. Can I have my hat? I need my hat, babycakes.

Can you give me my hat?

- What are they supposed to do for you?

- It exfoliates, and it's also good for circulation.

- [ laughs ] - [ squeals ]

- Oh, it's got a rhythm to it. - Oh!

- I feel like I'm being attacked by a tree.

If I'm gonna get beaten up by a wet bush,

let it be hot guys. That's my fantasy.

- Whoa! - It's like a car wash.

- Oh! That's hurts a little! Not so hard!

- Ow. - Not so hard!

- Ramona, it's time to turn over on the other side.

- No, I'm done. I'm done.

- It's your... your... [ laughter ]

That was enough for me. - All right, I'm gonna go.

- Time to turn over a new leaf. [ laughter ]

- I've never been beaten by a bunch of leaves.

It was a little sensual, I think.

A little sensual, yeah.

- Ow, that's great. Am I detoxed enough?

- Yeah. - Thank you.

- Should I start face down or face up?

- Face down. - Leah has a good body.

- This is the most action I've had in a while, believe me.

- I want the Leah special.

- Ah. - Ah!

- I don't know what it does for you,

but I know after this I might try S&M.

Ohh! Something to it.

People beat you, and you feel better.

- Tinsley! You're next. - No, I don't wanna do it.

- Why not? - Because I don't want to.

- You're not participating.

- I have allergies, and I'm probably allergic to this sh...,

so I don't know. This just looks weird.

- Oh, my God. I feel like I'm on a yacht,

like it's, like, moving.

I don't know what this does, but it works.

What are we doing now? - I'm gonna get a foot scrub.

- Oh, I want a foot scrub. - I want a foot scrub, too.

Okay.

For a foot scrub?

What kind of scrub makes you be face down?

I think you're being tricky here.

I'm not falling for the face down foot scrub.

I've had that before, and I ended up with Hannah.

- [ laughs ]

- Coming up...

- You have a pattern. When someone upsets you,

you go for the jugular. You go below the belt,

and you really hurt people. - You do it all the time.

So you should recognize it very well.

♪♪♪♪♪

♪♪♪♪♪

- Is it lunchtime?

- Yeah, let's go eat.

- Right? - Let's eat.

- Yeah, let's go have lunch. - Ooh.

- Oh, this looks pretty.

- We're six? - Wow, there must be

some crazy parties that go on in this room.

- Oh, yes. - Why is there a hot tub

in the corner? Oh, God. - Ew, gross.

- Caviar? - Oh, yeah, make me one, baby.

- Thank you. - Amazing.

Guys, I wanna make a little toast.

- Okay. - Yay.

- Okay. I have to admit that when I first met all of you,

it did feel like not fitting in, the downtown girl.

- Can you take the hat off? You can't make a toast

with that hat on. - Okay.

- I-I can't. I can't. - As time how gone by,

each and every one of you has really opened up to me,

and I just... I really appreciate it, so...

- Amazing. - Amazing.

- Thank you. - Thank you for bringing us

all the way down here. - Yeah.

- I actually enjoy it.

- It was very funky... - I think Hannah will love it.

- ...funky spa. - Yeah, something different.

- I've never seen anything like it.

- It's something different.

- I hope you're hungry. - What is that?

- Portobello mushrooms. - This is chicken shish kebab...

- Wow. - ...with the buckwheat.

- Oh, my God. - So I think before it gets

really cold out and the weather's still nice,

I'm looking into for all of us to go to Newport

for a couple of days. - To Newport, Rhode Island?

- Yeah, it's like a 3-hour drive.

- Oh, Newport's gorgeous.

- I think before we start planning another trip,

we need to handle the leftover drama of the last trip,

and that's what we should be talking about right now.

- Who wants some wine?

- We should take a boat ride to Jamestown.

- And nobody is.

- Somebody else. - All right, guys, hold on.

I feel like there's an elephant in the room,

and I need to get this... - There is?

- ...off my chest. - Go ahead.

- Oh, boy.

- But I'm just speaking from my heart right now.

The orchard trip... I went home and I cried afterwards.

I feel like we have to acknowledge it,

and we're not acknowledging that the orchard trip...

- It was a sh... show. - ...was a... ing sh... show,

and when I see people attacking each other,

I'm, like, oh, my God. It was a lot.

I mean, and I just want... I think we should just acknowledge it,

and that's it. - Well...

- Because if we don't acknowledge it...

- Okay. I acknowledge it. - Yep.

♪♪♪♪♪

- She's trying to point out the fact that at the orchard,

Tinsley felt ganged up on, which, rightly so,

because everybody kinda jumped down her throat,

but... but I think... - No, no, no, she made...

She made a comment, a flip comment,

"Well, I guess we can talk about John,

when you think you got the best spot."

- About John. - It was about...

- It's not easy for me to be that person

and tell everybody that kind of stuff, 'cause it's...

- It's called sharing.

It's really hard, strictly when people judge you on' em.

- Listen, my gum lasts longer than your relationship, okay?

- No, it was a sh... show, and we have to figure out ways

it doesn't happen again. Dorinda, don't be mad at me.

- Specific... What? - What?

- No, because I really thought about it before coming here,

and I know I'm not perfect.

God knows I'm not perfect. I make mistakes all the time.

- Okay, here we go. - I'm trying to get better.

You advise me of a lot of things, Dorinda.

I respect you tremendously,

but I realize that for some reason,

you have a pattern, and I love you.

Don't get me wrong. But when someone upsets you,

you go for the jugular. You go below the belt,

and you really hurt people,

and I don't think you even realize you do it.

- I think she knows she does it. - And I think after you do it,

you feel bad about it. - But you do it all the time.

- Yeah. - So you should recognize it

very well. - Mm-hmm.

- You do it all the time. - Zing!

- See, that's what you do. See, I'm trying...

- Well, you're bring... You just wanted to...

- No, see, that's what you do, Dorinda.

That's... Okay, I'm not going there.

That's your problem, and we'll just stop it now.

- Okay. All right. - Okay, I'm just gonna stop it

because that's really sh... ty.

Dorinda is turning this all around,

pointing fingers at me 'cause

she doesn't wanna recognize her own faults.

I mean, I can't even tell this girl anything

without her just... [ makes choking sound ]

- I don't think it's right for one of my best friends

in my life to be bringing up in a group, yelling out,

"Well, John texts women." I think that, you know...

I said, "What would you do if he texted somebody?"

If you knew he was at a party tonight,

he was taking girls' numbers, what would you do?

- Well, of course I'd be upset, but why again,

would you say that? - Why would you say that?

- That's an asshole thing to say.

- I said, "What would you do?"

- I'm very protective of her. - That was a zing, Ramona,

when you said... - What would you do?

- No, you said, you thought he was...

- So Ramona doesn't wanna do that.

As her friend, she shouldn't do this.

- Well, you did it to her in Cartagena.

You said, "I don't have a mugshot."

- You're a lady? You just broke your glass in front of me.

- Stop. Stop. Oh, I didn't get a...

I didn't get a mugshot over it.

- Really? - I didn't, really.

So I reacted. - What happened, she...

- No, but I'm saying you do this all the time.

This always happens. - I think the way

to do it, Ramona, if you recognize that,

is probably as your good friend that have both gone through

tremendous amounts of stuff together,

don't say things like that.

Pull me aside if you wanna take me,

and be kind, but not in a group.

I find it very entertaining that Ramona says I go

for her jugular when she's literally a living vampire.

She sucks the living life out of people

with her bad behavior.

- Why are you lecturing me after your behavior at the orchard?

- I'm just saying. - Well, I'm just saying.

This is about... This... Don't make this about me.

This is about you. If you wanna have a separate conversation

with me about other things, not a problem.

- Well, be more specifically... - Oh.

- Because you are not being specific.

- All right, I actually need a shot.

- Bring the vodka.

- I'm not trying to blow up the table.

I wasn't trying to... I'm honestly not trying to do that.

I was trying to have a dialogue. - I was gonna say, the table...

- I adore and respect all of you,

and it's something... I have a very special bond with Dorinda.

I feel that way. - I do, too.

- Mm-hmm. - But I am also terrified

that what if I do something that tr... And then...

- Triggers. - And then I'm

on the other side of it. - Right.

- Yeah. - It's scary.

- Well, don't be t... - I know. I've been

very scared of you.

- Instead of listening and hearing us,

Dorinda just goes for Ramona or whoever she can

in order to deflect the situation

so it's all about somebody else and not about her.

She is not hearing what we say.

- It's about, you know, I don't... I don't judge you.

- Yeah, I don't judge you either.

- And I respect you. - There you go.

- And I just hope that we would just... you would do the same.

- I don't judge you, and I respect you.

We don't have to have any more discussions.

- Let's toast to that. - We're good.

- I also said you deserve that. - Toast to a judgment-free zone.

- Yeah. - Yes.

- Yeah, baby. - Okay.

No judging. Support. - Yeah.

- And a little more respect for everybody.

- I gonna have to pee now.

- Okay, now you can go to the bathroom.

- Okay, go pee. - [ sighs ]

- Good. - Was it good?

- I don't know. It's just sort of a ceasefire.

- It is a solution. It is a ceasefire, which is good.

- Right, right, well, that's something.

- We're in a Russian place. This could've gone anothe way.

[ laughter ]

- Coming up...

- Are there condoms in the nightstand drawer?

- No! - No? You don't have condoms?

- No! I have a... a thing.

What do you call those things? - I don't wanna know.

♪♪♪♪♪

♪♪♪♪♪

[ knock on door ]

- Coming.

- Hi. - Hey, sister.

- Hi. How are you? Mwah. - Good to see you.

- Nothing. My neck is killing me.

- Oh, no. - Like, really bad.

- Why? - I just, like,

was doing squats yesterday and tweaked it.

Whoops.

- My sister is basically me times a hundred.

I feel like we kind of feel like twins,

like we share a little bit of the same soul.

It definitely gets intense sometimes.

But at this point in our lives, we're both adults.

We're both moms and best friends.

Do you want green juice? - Yes, please.

- And I have a little, um, chia pudding.

Oh, I also have a fruit salad that the pita chip made.

- Oh, a little pita chip.

- He really makes a good fruit salad, though. Look at it.

- You in the deep end of the hummus last night.

[ laughs ]

Pita chip is this guy that I'm dating.

He owns a kosher restaurant and pita bakery.

You know, I love Jews. I just can't even help it.

He's quirky and funny and interesting,

and I have no idea where it's gonna go. we'll see.

He owns a... ing pita place that sells pitas

to everybody in New York.

He's got a lot of money doing it.

I took a picture of myself nude with a pita here.

I sent it to him. - Okay.

- And then he sent it to a friend,

but he sent it to me, thinking he was sending it to a friend.

And obviously, I was, like, very upset

that I was, like, talking to someone

that would do something so corny.

I think that he's actually a gentleman.

He just made a mistake. I like weirdos.

I like intellectual, smart, funny.

I also am not into dating hot guys.

I like dating ugly guys.

I wanna be Beauty, and then I need a Beast.

I don't know. I like it. He's so...

- It's convenient, and honestly...

- It's very convenient. It is convenient.

- Convenience isn't... Isn't a good way to date.

- How was Connecticut this weekend?

- Honestly...

- Yeah, how was Mom and Dad?

- I hon... I don't wanna make you upset.

♪♪♪♪♪

It was, like, very stressful.

Mom was upset about you.

- Me and my mom are on speaking terms again

after I started drinking again, much to my mother's dismay.

I texted her, and I said, "Mom, let's stop fighting.

This is depressing. Life is too short."

And she didn't respond back to me.

- I told you, you have to go there in person.

She's angry, and now she's pulling away from you.

- There's definitely still lingering tension between us,

but for now, we're just sweeping it under the rug.

- For me, I don't really mix too much with Mom.

- I tell Mom everything. - I know.

- Which I have to stop. - I think you do.

- I think she wants me to stop telling her everything.

- She does. - But it's killing me,

'cause I'm like, "You're my mom."

- But I think the way you connect with her

is, like, bad behavior in some ways.

- That's true. I know. it's very...

- That was your dynamic. - That was the dynamic

from when I was a child.

I haven't learned how to, uh, undo that.

I think my sister's absolutely right.

I am in a way still caught in a dynamic

that's very old with my mother, even though I've changed so much

and our relationship has changed.

I'm still going back to old behavior,

old dynamic when it comes to me and her.

- Take a breath. Call her. See how she's doing.

Engage in a conversation with her that's about her.

- Right. - Just basics.

- I think so, too.

♪♪♪♪♪

♪ I'm-a live it up, live it up, live it up ♪

[ knock on door ] - Oh, my God. I'm not ready!

Go back. Go away.

[ knocking continues ] Go away.

I'm not even dressed yet. Who's there?

- It's me. - Oh! Look how pretty you are.

- Oh, my God. Look at you. - A berry?

Well, 'cause I was hot. I'm getting ready.

Nicole's here. She's staying over tonight.

- Hi, darlings. - Hey, sweetie.

- Nicole's in the kitchen, chopping. Mwah.

- Yeah, I had her sleep over

just so should could help in the kitchen.

- And you walking around in lingerie.

Are there any men coming? - I know, I know.

- She was bending over in lingerie before. No respect.

- Well, it's only girls here, so it's okay.

My girlfriends are really important to me,

and I find a great way to build relationships with them

is to have them to my apartment.

Hey, gorge. Look at you. - Hi. How are you?

So I bring different groups of women together,

and they network and they become friends

and go out socially after.

You know, I'm sort of a matchmaker with women friends.

I like it.

Nicole, have you met Christine before?

- Hi! - In the Hamptons briefly.

- Yes. - Weren't we at Bilboquet?

- Yes, yes. How are you? - Nice to see you.

- Who doesn't go to Bilboquet?

[ cork pops ]

♪♪♪♪♪

I'm glad you women are here because

I'm finally feeling this is, like, my home.

Yeah, I'm finally feeling it, which is good.

- It looks great.

- Are there condoms in the nightstand drawer?

- No! - No? You don't have condoms

in the... - No!

- Really?! - No!

- I'm gonna go check. I don't believe you.

- I don't have any condoms in the drawer.

I have a-a thing. What do you call those things?

- I don't wanna know.

There's things Avery doesn't need to know.

- All right, listen, if I had condoms, I would tell you.

I do not have condoms.

- I can't believe you don't have condoms.

I definitely like to get a little bit of a rise

out of Ramona because she plays the Catholic girl,

"I'm so innocent," and then she talks about how horny she is

and she's never been hotter.

- Last fall, I was in a relationship with someone,

and I kept condoms for him 'cause he sometimes...

He needed more and he wanted more 'cause he...

Oh, my God! - Say it. How many did he use?

- Wait, wait. He wanted more.

So you gave him multiple orgasms.

I'm impressed. - Okay, I'm embarrassed!

Oh, my God. - Oh, you... Stop.

- All right. Stop, stop. - So now... how many condoms

did he use when he last... - He needed three.

- In one night?

- Yeah. - Wow. I wanna sleep with you.

[ laughter ]

♪♪♪♪♪

[ door buzzing ] Oh, yeah, I saw him yesterday.

He took me to...

[ buzzing continues ]

- Really? [ buzz, buzz ]

[ laughter ]

- I had FOMO the whole way. Fear of Missing Out.

I brought you the dress that you couldn't zip up.

- Seriously? I love that dress. I'm so excited.

- It's a Large. - No, it's okay.

Maybe I need an Extra Large.

- It looked so good in the picture.

You just couldn't zip it up, right?

- I know. I couldn't zip up the back.

- So this one I tried on. You'll be able to zip it up.

- Oh, good. If you can wear it, I can wear it.

We're the same. - Okay.

[ knock on door ] Entre.

- Hello! - Ah, the best for last.

So beautiful. [ gasps ] - Sorry I'm late.

- Thank you. - Let me see it.

Let me see this outfit.

Yesterday, it was a sh... show with Dorinda and me.

- Thank you for having me. - Yeah.

- You look beautiful. - So do you.

I already invited Dorinda.

I'm not gonna disinvite her, and I hope she's gonna be

in a good mood and be more the old Dorinda

and not that new hateful Dorinda.

- Hello, girls. How's cocktails and conversations going?

- Hi! Yeah. [ laughs ]

[ indistinct conversations, laughter ]

- You look beautiful. - I gave Ramona a dress

that I'd given her in a meeting, but she needed a Large.

So I brought the Large. - Oh, good.

- When were at the spa, in the locker room,

Ramona tells me that I need to lose at least 10 pounds

because I'm beautiful.

I'm beautiful with weight on, bitch. I mean, really?

[ crunching ]

- Oh, I enjoyed that, um, spa. - It was Old World.

It wasn't posh and circumstance, really.

- So this was like down and dirty.

- Right. - I mean, it's all...

It's... it's the Russian spa. - I've been to this place.

- Of course you've been there. - The Wall Street guys

would go with their strippers to the Russian bath.

- Oh, Jesus. - I knew there was a story

behind this place.

- Wait. So who came up with it? Was it Leah?

- Oh, yeah. - Of course.

- So did you have fun? - At the spa?

- Yeah. - Well, I was happy that,

you know, Tinsley could get those four words out.

- What words? - "I respect you."

- Well, I think she just didn't want

any more altercation with you. - Right.

- I think what she said was, "You know what?

I respect you, and I don't judge you."

- Yeah. - And I thought that was

a very nice thing to... - Yeah, I said the same thing.

No, but I gotta tell you, Ramona, what you did

was wrong yesterday. - You know what?

- It was wrong. - I was a little shocked.

- I gotta tell you, something came today.

- Dorinda, you do that all the time to people.

- Okay. So... - You take people down

all the time. - You know this word?

- Oh, yeah. - Oh, of course.

- Schadenfreude. I'm married to a German.

You know what schadenfreude is?

- Yeah. - You don't wish someone ill,

but if something bad happens, you get pleasure from it.

- Are you crazy? - But they do better than you.

- You're nuts. You are so nuts.

- And you bring up something from two years ago.

You're like, "Were you in Cartagena with Luann?"

You're supposed to be my friend.

- That was 17 diarrheas ago. - It had nothing to do with me.

I need you always to support me. - I said to you...

I do support you. - No, you don't.

- You lash out at everybody.

Anybody questions anything you say, she gets nuts.

- Oh, the person of etiquette. - I'm gonna walk away.

- This is a woman... - You said talk alone.

- Do it now.

- I need you always

- I need you always to support me.

- I do support you. - No, you don't.

Are you jealous I'm back with Luann?

- Excuse me. Excuse me. - This is a woman

that dumped me... - You said talk alone.

Talk alone. - I don't wanna talk alone.

- But you know, but that's what you accuse me of.

- I'm gonna do what you did now. - If you have something to say,

talk alone. - You're acting like Tinsley

screaming back.

It's a little ironic that Dorinda,

if I bring up something I remember about John,

or this one, "Ramona, talk to me in private!

Don't do it in front of people." But yet here,

these are people she doesn't even know,

and she's going off like... Like she's... like a crazy woman.

- At the end of the lunch yesterday,

she calls me crying because she fat-shames her,

tells her she needs to lose weight.

- I was upset after that. That was true.

- She cried to me all night. This woman empowerment...

I think what you love to do is do well,

but not better than me.

You want always to run, take the best, get the best.

The way you run around houses... - Do you think so?

- ...to get rooms. We go to our room.

- Listen, these are my girlfriends.

- This poor woman is going through...

You know what I'm trying to do? - I think you're like that.

You're so angry. - You like people's misfortune.

You like to deflect on you... - That's not...

- ...to make people feel bad. - That's not true.

- You're a coward. - I'm not a coward.

- Schaden... How do you say it? Schadenfreude?

- You like to take control of the conversation.

- Do you think that was nice to bring up two years ago...

Cartagena? - Do you think it was nice

the way you spoke to... - Do you think it was nice?

- To Tinsley? Do you think that was nice?

- Oh, now you're so concerned with Tinsley.

- Oh, yeah. - You don't give a sh...

About Tinsley. - Yes, I do.

Dorinda, I'm so sorry you're so unhappy.

I'm so sorry you're so unhappy. - Well, we are unhappy.

- I'm sorry that Richard died tomorrow.

- We are unhappy. - I'm sorry that

it's your anniversary coming up.

- I'm sorry you can't land a boulder.

I'm sorry there's been so many men in your life

that have come and gone, and you can't land a boulder.

- Oh, my God. This is... - Sorry.

- I think you should just leave. Just leave. Just leave.

- I wanna leave. - Yeah.

- I wanna leave. - Dorinda, don't leave.

- We're all unhappy. - Yeah, we're unhappy.

- Dorinda, I'm telling you, this is so dis...

- Yeah, I know. - Come on. Let's go.

- Really? The two of you are leaving?

- Yeah. We'll go. - Come on.

- Yeah, I love to be kicked out of a good house.

- No, she's just crazy. - Sonja...

- They're both nuts.

- Sonja, Dorinda, come back inside.

- She said to me yesterday, you have something negative

to say about me, do it privately.

So now, she's doing exactly what she doesn't want me to do,

so who's she preaching to?

- But the thing is, I wanna be myself.

If I wanna be fat, I wanna be fat.

If I wanna drink, I wanna drink.

Why is she shaming me? - You're not fat.

- I'm not fat. - Listen, I love you both.

I don't wanna fight with you. - We're upset.

I needed your support yesterday. - I don't wanna fight with you!

I don't wanna fight with you!

- I needed your support yesterday.

- Well, I tried to help you. - No, you didn't.

You brought it up at lunch. You should've just let it sit.

- I'm sorry. - You know it's a bad week,

and you know I just broke up

from a seven and a half-year relationship!

- Oh, my God. You guys have... - I'm weak right now!

- Stop.

- During this time, which isn't easy

between everything with the house, breaking up,

just general sort of slight depression,

to be honest with you,

I don't need her to be knocking me down.

I need you to be building me up. I need a soft place to land.

You're not a pillow. You're a concrete block.

- I don't want to hurt you. I love you.

- I don't either. We love each other.

We've been through so much together.

- I know that. - So it's so unusual.

Like, Tinsley... when we fight, I don't feel anything.

- Can we bring it back inside? - But with you, it breaks me.

You're like a sister to me. - Let's work it out

so we're not in the hall. Start walking.

- I know that. - I go home, and my heart hurts.

- I love you both. - Bring it inside.

- I love you both so much. I do. - And I know you don't mean it

out of meanness. You're trying to help,

but I always say it's sometimes the delivery,

and I know my delivery's not good.

I wanna get rid of the hysterics

of our lives. - I do, too.

- And I'm trying with my life coach.

- I need my girls. I need you. - I'm trying with the coach.

- I need you. I need you. - I'm trying. I'm trying.

- I need you! - I don't wanna be alone again.

I'm afraid. - Well, I'm afraid

I'm gonna be alone forever, so I can relate to that, okay?

I'm gonna be alone forever. All right.

[ laughter ]

I love you both so much. I'm glad that

all three of us are friends. I really am.

- And you know...

- Yeah. - You know, the three of you

could drive Mother Teresa to drink.

- I love Dorinda. She is like a sister to me,

but Dorinda's not acknowledging how mean-spirited she can be.

It's very hurtful.

When Dorinda acts like this, you can do nothing.

You can do nothing because nothing will work... nothing,

except to shut your mouth.

- I have your back. You may not think I do.

But I do. - No, I know you do.

- And I'm your champion. - I know.

- I only want the best for you, Dorinda.

I love you so much, seriously. - I love you.

And that's it. If we ever have a problem,

just pull me aside... - Yes, I promise.

- ...like we have for years. - Oh, I'm sweatin' from that.

- Me, too. - I'm sweatin'.

- Next time on "The Real Housewives of New York City"...

- All right. - Downtown Newport. Whoa!

We're almost there! Yay!

- I actually feel horny again, don't you?

- The smell.

- Maybe we could get our mojo going again.

- Can you put maybe, like, two more shots of vodka?

- No. - Ramona, stop.

Don't even start with me. - Two more shots?

- Am I gonna get thrown out of Rhode Island, Tinsley?

Am I gonna get thrown out of... ing Newport?

Yeah!

Oh! Hell, no, bitch!

- I love Leah, but I don't know what's happening here.

- [ speaking indistinctly in high-pitched mocking voice ]

- I don't wanna be embarrassed in Newport.

- She's not afraid to be embarrassed

anywhere else in the world.

I was not gonna stand by... - I mean, she blacked out

- ...and let that bullsh... blow over.

- I am who I am.

- I know, but then I don't know if I can... I don't know...

- You may not like me then. - You're right.

- You know what I mean? That's it.

- 'Cause I don't like that behavior.

Subtitles Diego Moraes(oakislandtk) www.opensubtitles.org