Original subtitles

- Previously on...

- I'm finished today! - Yeah, today.

- Thank you. Probation... it's finished.

- Yeah!

- You can drink to that.

- [ crying ] I want a man to hold me, to love me,

to want me, to be with me.

- You will find it.

- This is actually my friend Leah. I brought her.

This is Dorinda. - Hi. How are you?

Nice to meet you. - Welcome.

- I've been through hell the last couple of years.

I'm divorced. I've been arrested, so... [ laughs ]

- I've been arrested, too. It... ing sucks.

- For what? - Attacking a police officer.

- Oh, God. Me, too. - I saw you in January,

and a week later, you had dinner with Scott.

It's about transparency.

There seems to be a lot of side game going on.

- You're calling me a liar.

- Don't think you're tricky, because you ain't gonna...

- You're saying... - ...be tricky with me.

- You're saying that I'm a liar. - I will win every time.

♪♪♪♪♪

- I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong.

♪♪♪♪♪

- I'm no one's accessory. I'm the whole lifestyle brand.

- I don't need to find love. I love myself.

- I may float like a butterfly, but I sting like a bitch.

- Life isn't a fairy tale,

but I'm hoping mine's the exception.

- Raise the curtain. Lower the lights.

I'm taking center stage in my life.

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hold on. - Let's... [ laughs ]

Let's not... [ speaks indistinctly ]

- I think we'll get killed by bikes now...

- Seriously. - ...and get killed on bikes.

- It's scary. Biking's dangerous.

I won't do it. I wouldn't drive in this city!

- Right. No, you drove in the city.

- You're doing great. - Blinking yellow?

What does that even mean? That's, like, something new.

- Uh, you need to go slowly left.

- Okay. Aah! [ brakes screech ]

- That was touchy... - I can... I can drive.

I mean, yeah... - It has touchy brakes.

- There's guys that are gonna try and pick us up.

Let's just ignore them. - Oh. [ chuckles ]

- Hot guys, though.

Oh, I'm exhausted from the stairs.

[ laughs ] - That was a workout.

- I know you said "rooftop," but jeez.

- Just before Leah comes, you're like my sister.

We're friends. - Yeah.

- You keep sort of jumping on this Dorinda bandwagon

of acting like you don't know me, or I'm not open or honest.

- Well, no. I said I know you.

Dorinda doesn't know the real you.

- Do we know who Tinsley is? - But you do.

- I know you... - Right.

- ...but you don't know her.

She doesn't show you the true sides.

- The thing is, she's calling me a liar, Sonja.

- What did she say you lied about?

- Well, when she was saying that I was still with Scott

when I wasn't. I mean, you went and jumped up...

- But you were.

You went on a trip with him, and then you had dinner with him...

- Babe, I wasn't with him. - ...after we were with you.

- Listen, though. - Yeah?

- We had broken up. We were still broken up.

I wasn't in an arrangement where I was getting money from him.

Wait. Don't look at me like that.

- I've heard of spottings of Tinsley and Scott

several times since the breakup, so of course I think

Tinsley's still in an arrangement with Scott.

Otherwise, she's the only woman on Earth that gets

more dresses, shoes, bags, bling after the breakup.

- Why would I be crying over Scott if we were...

- Anything to drink? - ...still together,

but I was lying to you girls and saying that we weren't?

I was really emotional. I'm sorry, yes,

we would like a drink. - No, no, no, you're fine.

- Um, may I have a glass of wine, please? A pinot grigio?

- Absolutely. - Thank you.

What do you want? - I'll have rosé.

- Rosé? All right. I'll bring those right over.

- Hi! - Hi!

Well, there was... Hi. Hi! - How are you?

- Hi! - Hi. How are you?

And I think they thought

you were not being truthful about it.

[ kisses cheek ] - Hi.

- How are you? - Nice to see you.

- You look great. - Thank you.

- Well, I-I can only say the truth so many times...

- Well, let's not... - ...before... I just can't...

- Let's not talk about it in front of your new friend here.

- What am I gonna do? Well, she was there.

- We don't need to bog her down in it.

- She just, for some reason, turned on me.

I was always friends with Dorinda, so...

- I think she doesn't feel you're forthright with her.

You don't really tell her what's going on.

- Honey, you've been so forthcoming with me.

- Yeah.

- And that's why I'm like, "I don't understand."

Maybe Tinsley confides in me and Sonja

because we don't call her a hooker.

- My heel got stuck.

The difference is, honey, I bought them.

- And I bought my whole outfit, too.

- Oh, my God!

If Dorinda treated me like she treated Tinsley,

I wouldn't tell the bitch what I had for lunch.

- Thank you.

- Can I please, please wear these?

- Try them. - I'm, like, suffering.

- Do you wanna try mine? - I'm just... I'm suffering.

The sun... Oh, my God, thank you. - Dorinda implying that

I'm not being truthful or honest, but I'm allowed

to go back and forth in a relationship if I want to

because it's my effing life.

Just because I meet my ex-boyfriend Scott

does not mean that we are together.

And every time that we have been back and forth

and back and forth, which, it does happen all the time,

I didn't think that I needed to share that with her.

- Oh, by the way, Ramona did call me today and...

- Oh! - Oh!

- She said, "I want you to come out to the Hamptons."

- I think we should all plan a week in the Hamptons.

- We could slumber at your house.

- Good suggestion! Being sober's made you even smarter.

- [ laughs ] - Let's ask you about you.

- Yeah. - I only...

- Oh, my God. You have a tattoo? - I have a lot of tattoos.

I'm getting a big one removed on my back.

- No! What's on your back?

- It's a tramp stamp.

- What's it say? - My name.

It was my first tattoo.

- That's so when they have sex behind,

they remember who you are.

- It's my... Yeah, exactly. Right. That's exactly it.

You know how many times I've heard that?

Way too many times. - Leah has a beautiful body,

and I think that says something negative about her,

that she would get tattoos, because it's very self...

def... Is it defecating?

No, that's sh... ting on yourself.

It's sort of sh... ting on yourself,

but it's, like, self-defaming.

Well... - I know, they wouldn't let me

in the country club. - ...we will never have sex.

You can relieve yourself. - [ laughs ]

- I have to have you... That's a deal-breaker for me.

- Honey, you don't have sex with men with tattoos?

- Never.

- There's a few things in this life I'm sure of,

and one of them is that Sonja is not gonna kick a hot young guy

out of bed because he's got a... ing anchor tattoo.

- I feel like tattoos look so creepy.

- But you know I have the RLM. I have Topper's initials... "RLM."

- No one's gonna [ bleep ] you with that there.

My dick would go like that. Ugh.

- [ laughs ]

- Well, what else could it stand for?

You could tell guys it's a "really lusty moment."

- Really lusty mo... - Say, "This is for you, baby...

'really lusty moment.'" [ laughter ]

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hey, Len? - Yes, Ms. D.?

- Do you mind helping me pack?

You do it so much better than me.

It's such a weird time to go to the Hamptons,

because it's, like, hot and cold.

- Wow. [ laughs ] Back and forth.

- Isn't this very Ramona? - Yeah.

- You know she's gonna want this dress.

- Yeah. [ laughs ] - What do you think?

- Yes. - With my bazoongas now?

- [ laughing ] - Because they're so big.

It's good to hear Ramona is now going to be lady of the manor,

overseeing the group.

I just hope that I'm in the bedroom, way upstairs,

and that Tinsley's in the bedroom way downstairs.

This thing, I never wore.

What was I thinking when I bought this?

What the hell is this thing? [ laughter ]

The good old days.

Now I'm down to this. - [ laughs ]

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hello. - Hi. How are you?

Table for two. de Lesseps.

- Sure. Would you like to have some wine during the wait?

- Uh, not... not for me, but maybe my girlfriend.

I'm gonna take a Diet Coke. - Sure, absolutely.

- Thank you. - Okay. [ speaks indistinctly ]

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hi.

- Aw, you're so sweet. Like, yeah.

- Sure. Nice to meet you. - You, too.

Um, well, take my number. - Okay.

♪♪♪♪♪

- And it's Ramona. - Ramona.

I'm gonna ring this through, Ramona.

- Okay. I got it.

- Nice to meet you. - You, too.

[ indistinct conversations ]

- How are you? - Oh, pretty good.

What, did you pick up some guys at the bar already?

- No, he picked me up. [ laughter ]

- That was fast. - I'm a born flirt.

I even flirt with women, okay?

If I stop flirting, then I'm dead.

- Was he handsome? - I don't know. [ laughs ]

- What do you mean, you don't know?

You gave your number to a guy... - You know what?

- ...that you don't even know if he's handsome?

- He's attractive.

He's age-appropriate. - Okay.

- Well-dressed. - Okay.

- Good manners, and...

- You figured that all out in two seconds?

- Yeah, I did. - He has good manners, too?

- No, good manners count, you know?

- I'd like to find a boyfriend.

- All right, let's put it out there.

- No, I'm... I've put it out in the universe. It's out there.

- All right. I did a storyboard.

- [ laughs ] Oh, you did? That's hysterical.

- You take a big piece of cardboard.

I put a photo of the kind of guy I like.

I like to travel, so I put all these exotic places.

You know, I don't need to be married,

but I would like to have a commitment,

so I put, like, a ring. I'd be happy with just a ring.

- Now you're starting to sound like a serial murderer.

[ laughter ] - No. It's the storyboard...

- Am I blushing? - Yeah. Oh, my God.

I can't imagine what else she's got taped up on that board.

She's got dick pics, maybe? [ laughs ]

- Here you go. - I ordered a salad,

just to have it. - Okay.

You wanna share, or you want that yourself?

- Yeah, yeah. No, we'll share. - What are you having?

- I'm having Diet Coke, but have a glass of wine.

- I'll have a Diet Coke. - Sure.

- Thank you. - You sure?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You can have a glass of wine.

So I initially said to you

it'd be fun to have a slumber party and...

- Right. I wanna bond with you,

I want you to bond with everyone.

I want everyone to bond together.

- All right. I'll definitely come on Friday, right?

- Yes. I have a room... You know, you can choose,

but I do have a room that's a big separate bathroom,

own entrance, that's more quiet.

- Listen, I don't... I don't need to be favored, you know?

- Well, no, do you wanna be quiet

and away with your own bathroom?

- Awesome. - You know, you can always

sneak in a guy there at night. No one'll know.

- Oh, yeah. - Separate entrance.

- There ya go.

- I definitely don't want a repeat situation

with Luann in the fish room.

- Don't tell me I'm in the fish room.

[ laughter ] - Wait. What?

- I mean, the room is not some sh... room.

- It's like the mobsters, they go,

"You're going down with the fishes."

- Got some... ing nerve,

putting me in the... ing fish room.

- So I made sure I gave her a nice room.

It's quiet. So if we're up late

and Sonja and Tinsley are going crazy till 2:00 in the morning,

playing crazy music... - Right. So who's coming?

- Okay, Tinsley, Sonja, Dorinda...

- Is Tinsley's friend coming? 'Cause she said...

- Is it Leah or Layla? - Leah.

- I know it's two syllables... Leah.

- I really like her, actually. She's cool.

- So what do you like about her?

- One of the first things she told me is,

"You know, I've been arrested."

"Oh, really?" - [ laughs ]

- Instant connection, right?

- What was she arrested for? Or did she not say?

- Assault on a police officer. - No way.

- Swear to God. - Are you kidding me?

- But when she was, like, 19 or something.

- Well, the fact that she was arrested like you were,

'cause she assaulted a police officer,

I mean, that right there broke the ice tremendously.

- Yeah. That broke the ice tremendously.

- That just... that just took down all the barriers

and just let it all flow. - Yeah, exactly.

- Let's face it. How many people get arrested?

Of course they bonded over their arrest.

- Fricassée de homard. - Okay, so we are sharing.

Thank you so much. - Okay? Enjoy. You're welcome.

- [ singsongy ] Fabulous.

- So... - Hold on one sec.

Look at the pictures that Dorinda sent me.

- Um... Oh, okay. That melts my heart, okay?

- [ laughs ] Isn't that cute?

- Because it was really sad when you two...

- I know. - ...just had this discord,

and that's why I'm really hoping that this weekend

that we can all come together as a group.

All right. Here's to a fun weekend,

just enjoying each other's company.

It's girls. It's girls. [ glasses clink ]

- Here's to being back. - Yeah, being back.

- Being back to Lou.

- Coming up...

- My chiropractor said only drink clear alcohol.

- Yeah. - The wine is poison!

Meanwhile, pass the rosé.

♪♪♪♪♪

♪♪♪♪♪

- Okay, girls, this is your healthy food.

I know we were vegan at the shelter,

but you're not vegan now.

So we just eat turkey.

We're just gonna be hand-fed now.

I went to China this past summer to go help with rescues,

and Strawberry and Shortcake had been rescued

off of this dog meat truck,

and I had to come home with them.

Shortcake, you need to eat something.

The hard thing is that they speak Chinese,

and I have to learn how to speak Chinese

in order to communicate with them.

Translator... wait.

- Hao nuhái.

- Good girl! Here.

- Hao nuhái.

That means "good girl."

Hao nuhái.

No. Hao "menái."

♪♪♪♪♪

- Will you take this one?

Take that one. - I got it. No, you're fine.

- Yay! We are ready!

- Fancy lady.

- Not really. I mean, I have my sweats.

I want... You're fancy. Oh, my. - Is that Marley?

That's Marley, right?

- You don't recognize him 'cause he's a mess.

- Sonja, is that another dog in your bag?

- [ laughs ] Looks like roadkill, right?

I just brought all my hair.

- You brought flowers? 'Cause, you know, I didn't bring any.

- Oh! Thank God!

♪♪♪♪♪

[ ducks quacking ]

- Look how pretty the colors, Alice.

- Yeah. - Gorgeous, right?

- Yeah, I know.

- Yeah, fall is around the corner, though.

Look, when they start turning purple,

you know it's time to whip out the sweaters.

[ laughter ]

All right, I'm gonna go and pack.

I gotta go to Ramona's. - Really?

- Can you believe it, Alice? - Wow.

- I'm leaving my house to go and stay at Ramona.

- Why?

- That's a very good question, Alice.

- [ laughs ] Party, party. - Party, party.

[ seabirds calling ]

- Come on, I got the food... Not for you, for the girls and me.

It's all room temperature, which is good.

I can serve it whatever time everyone gets here.

Oh, yeah! That looks so good.

Coco, would you like a carrot?

Sweetie?

Coco?

Coco!

[ high-pitched voice ] Coco!

[ normal voice ] Would you like a carrot, honey?

At this point, Coco's all I got at home, and she can't hear me.

I mean, listen, some of these men,

I don't want them to listen to me or hear me.

But, Coco, come on! Listen up! [ claps hands ]

What's their ETA, for goodness' sakes?

No one's telling me anything.

♪♪♪♪♪

- Where do you... How do you wanna sit?

- You wanna get... You wanna sit there? Okay.

I'm just gonna put this stuff here. [ grunts ]

- Oh, my God. No, I packed so messy because I was rushing.

- [ hoarse voice ] I got this, like,

really weird cough and stuff, and I don't wanna lose my voice.

What are we gonna do if I can't speak?

- I know. We need to get you better.

The last time you saw Dorinda... - Right.

- ...she said some wild-ass sh...

- Some wild stuff. - She's on your dick, isn't she?

- She's just... I know, she's on me.

- She's on it.

Listen, I survived going to an all-girl Catholic school

on the Upper East Side,

so I can handle petty and mean and catty and all that.

But I am on their turf this weekend,

so I'm gonna be on high alert. - If I can talk...

- You might be screaming. [ laughs ]

- I'll be, like, doing, like, hand signs. Like, writing notes.

- [ laughing ] - Not as powerful.

It'd be like, "Hold on... 'Yeah, bitch!'"

[ laughter ]

- Tell me what happened with Tinsley the other night

at your cocktail dinner.

- I just had fun joshing this girl she introduced us to.

- I gotta make... I gotta try to get to know her this weekend.

- You're gonna die.

- I probably didn't give Leah a fair chance...

So I...

will try harder to not be so judgmental,

because I shouldn't do guilt by association.

You think I'm gonna like her?

- You're gonna have her say three "Hail Marys" first.

- What's that mean, "Have her say three 'Hail Marys' first?"

- Well, she has a tramp stamp... - Oh, God.

- I told Ramona... It's her name.

- This girl, she has tattoos everywhere.

- If Avery or my daughter got a tattoo, I would...

Oh, my God, I'd be...

I'd have a heart attack.

I said, "Oh, so when I'm having sex,

they'll know my name if I get a tramp..."

I mean, who has their ...ing name on their backside?

This girl is gangster. [ laughs ]

- All right, I think everything's done.

I'm starving. I don't know where they are. I'm starving.

- We are here, we are here, we are here.

- Gorgeous.

- Oh, yeah, let the party start.

I'll make my own party. [ laughs ]

- [ singsongy ] Hello?

- Well, hello! I'm about to have a party by myself.

- Where are you?

- Ooh, you got my favorite color... yellow flowers.

- Look what Dorinda got you! - Aah! I love it!

Let's... Oh, my God... Holy sh... - It's a Frosé machine.

- Dorinda always has fun gifts.

Last year, she brought me these mermaid outfits.

- Yay!

- She... Back it up!

- Back up! - Whoa! Aah!

And this year, she brought me a Frosé,

which is for rosé... Frozen rosé. Love it.

- Oh, my God, Ramona, this looks amazing.

- You're the first two to arrive, my favorite two.

Come on. Outside, now.

Here, bring this out. Bring this out for me.

- I'm excited about having a glass of Pinot Grigio or nine.

- My chiropractor said only drink clear alcohol.

- Yeah. - The wine is poison!

Meanwhile, pass the rosé.

Sometimes I just have to pick my poison, don't I?

♪♪♪♪♪

- I think I'm gonna drink my vodka. Here, that's for you.

- That's vodka. You don't drink wine anymore.

- Because I... That's why I lost my belly.

I still... Now I got a little bit back...

- Hello?

- There she is!

- Aah! - I'm sorry.

Sorry I'm late. I had such... - No, it's perfect timing.

- ...such a headache. My neck was killing me.

Hey, girls!

- Hi! - Hi!

- We were just saying how fabulous you are.

- Oh? You were? Oh, that's nice.

I like to hear that. - Yes, you're in a great space.

- Hello! - Hi.

- Oh, I'm so happy you're staying tonight.

- That's a first. - This is a first.

- A slumber party in the Hamptons.

- Victoria goes, "Where you going, Mom?"

I said, "I'm having a sleepover at Ramona's."

She goes, "No way!" - Yes!

- Weirder things have happened. - That's for sure.

Mommy's been married, divorced, and arrested.

- Yeah. [ laughs ]

- And now you're sleeping at Ramona's? What's wrong with you?

- What is going on? - Yeah.

- Coming up...

- I don't talk to people with tattoos.

- What?! - Wait, what?

- She knows your name, which is amazing.

- And if she forgets it, you just turn around and bend over.

♪♪♪♪♪

♪♪♪♪♪

[ seabirds call ]

♪♪♪♪♪

- How are we gonna carry all our sh... in?

- Can Marley go down? 'Cause I wanna sit down. I'm sorry.

- Yeah, he smells really bad. He hasn't been to the groomer.

- Ugh. Well, then you have to take him off.

He can sit over there. - Listen, Coco doesn't mind him.

I don't know what your problem is. Okay, go.

- Look, it's so nice.

- This is Ramona's house. Yeah, I know, isn't it nice?

It's, like, clean and nice.

Hello?

- Hi! - Hi, girls.

- Yay! You got here! - Hey.

- How are you? - Okay, don't talk. Don't talk.

- Hi! - I'm good. How are you?

- You're so cute. [ Marley barks ]

- Hi, Leah. - How are you?

- Good, thanks so much for having me.

- You're always welcome.

Any friend of hers is a friend of mine.

- Thank you, thank you.

- I'm very inclusive, just so you know.

- I had a cough last night, and it just...

- You had a... Remember, you had this cough

when you came to my house?

- I know. - Hi. How are you?

- Hi. How are you? Nice to see you.

- All right, so I'll show you to your room.

- When it comes to Tinsley this weekend,

I wanna do the see no evil, hear no evil.

Well, I can't say "speak no evil"

'cause that always happens.

- Green room.

- I love this room. - Yeah, it's pretty.

- So pretty.

- I'm the kind of person, when you're at my house,

free access to everything. Everything.

You wanna go in the refrigerator,

you want a snack, whatever you want.

- Thank you. - Just make yourself welcome.

- I so appreciate that. - Yeah.

- I have a little gift for you

that I wanna get that's in the car.

- Oh, that's so unnecessary, but so sweet.

- So you're in the Jill room. So it's a twin bed. 'm sorry.

- Beautiful.

- All right, and then you have your girlfriend

right next to you, so there you go.

- Perfect. Well, thank you for...

♪♪♪♪♪

[ music warps off ] - Is this the basement?

- It's the lower level. - Okay.

[ music resumes playing ] - So there's...

- We're calling it "the lower level." Okay.

- Gimme a break. A basement is a basement.

- You have a whole area,

this big TV to hang out if you wanted to,

besides everything else we have in the house.

- Okay.

- This will be your own separate area.

- Right. Uh-huh. - And this is another room.

- It's like putting me in the attic

and calling it the penthouse.

What happened to the...

- I said you'd have privacy.

- I'm always last on the totem pole

when it comes to rooms when we go on vacations together.

The lack of Ramona's consideration

is just mind-blowing.

[ bag thuds ]

[ thud ]

♪♪♪♪♪

Plug. [ cords clatter ]

Ugh.

♪♪♪♪♪

- [ whispers ] I just saw a spider,

and I don't wanna kill it, so I'm gonna try to get it quickly.

Aah! [ squeaks ] Aah!

- You know, what I wanted to ask you,

how do I adjust the air conditioning downstairs?

It's too cold.

- You can't.

- What do you mean I can't?

- I don't know. It just... it's too cold? It's like 70 degrees.

- It's cold. Why can't you turn it off?

- And there's a blanket.

- No, I know, but I don't wanna sleep with air conditioning.

I just don't sleep with air conditioning.

- Okay. I'll figure it out.

- Unbelievable.

- Okay, so I'm gonna... So it's easier access.

- All right. - I'm gonna put the wine...

- Okay. - ...right in here.

What is... Leah doesn't drink.

Yeah.

- Um, she actually doesn't drink now.

- No, no, right. [ bottles clank ]

That's how she and Luann bonded.

They both went to prison... No, they both were arrested.

- [ laughs ] So was I! Remember?

- They both were arrested, and they both don't drink.

- Yes, yes. - So there you go.

- Exactly. [ clank ]

- Come on.

[ clank ] All right.

[ TV turns on, playing indistinctly ]

- Ah.

She's got some... ing nerve.

[ cellphone rings ] - What's up?

I could talk now. I'm not gonna be able to talk for a while.

What's up?

No. I just... I don't think so.

Blue Stone Manor flooded,

so I had to go through the house and just rip out

the whole heating system, rip out the whole duct system,

the whole electrical system.

And I'm so overwhelmed because I have to deal

with so many moving parts,

all day, every day, and then do my normal life.

[ sighs deeply ]

[ voice breaking ] You know, I'm trying to get everything done,

and I'm stressed out all the time.

It just seemed to never end... The questions, the phone calls,

the replacement values, the estimates, the claims.

Nonstop.

- Two. - Thank you so much.

Okay, great. - You're welcome.

- Thank you.

- Advil is the best for inflammation.

All right, I am gonna go... - Thank you.

- ...and bring this down. - Are you... Oh, where are you?

- I'm gonna go down to...

the kiddie room downstairs. [ laughs ]

- Oh, no! I didn't have anything to do that!

- I'm in the basement. - I had nothing to do with that!

- Hey, babe. - Coming up to see you.

I was about to come see you.

Come... You wanna hang out down here or up in your room?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I'm gonna put

a little rosé... - Have a little wine with me.

I don't know what it is, Sonja. I'm just not myself today.

- What's going on? What's going on?

- I don't know. I just feel, like, overwhelmed.

Every call that I get, I'm like... It's just overwhelming.

I gotta get my sh... together.

- You've got a lot on your plate.

You have a flood at the Berkshires,

so it's like more of a labor of love.

- I just got a call... I just called... got a call.

The thing has gone over by another $15,000.

[ voice breaking ] I don't know why I wanna cry, but I do.

- Gotta be bringing up all those feelings.

- And you know, like, I really...

And listen, I'm doing everything and nothing well.

You know that feeling?

I just don't have anybody, and I'm not a whinger at all,

but, you know, every once in a while, I think...

I just wish I had someone that could step in and say,

"I'm gonna make it all better,

and you can just forget and be that carefree person again."

There's nothing carefree about me anymore.

♪♪♪♪♪

- Coming up...

- Do you have a voice? - I totally have a voice.

- Well, don't make generalizations about me.

- You're making the generalizations about me.

♪♪♪♪♪

- I just wish I had someone that

- I just wish I had someone that could step in and say,

"I'm gonna make it all better."

There's nothing carefree about me anymore.

I'm not nice to anybody.

My mother said it to me... "You're wound too tight."

It's not healthy.

I feel the same anxiety I felt after Richard died.

Like, you don't know who to turn to, where to turn

'cause it's so big. - You don't have Richard

to make your life carefree anymore. I get it.

- Yeah.

- It doesn't make John any less of a man. And he's...

- It's just different with John. - Just a different guy.

- John, who's never been married.

John's never been a real grown-up.

I mean, he has a... runs a business and all that,

but, you know, it's different to run homes and run children.

It's not that I can't lean on John.

John wants to be as helpful as he can.

But you remember, John has never had responsibilities like this.

There's only one person I can have a discussion with

about everything now, and it's myself.

[ crying ] Every day, it's another, like, $15,000, $20,000.

- How could you do everything well when you're...

There's just too many balls in the air.

How can you catch 'em all? - I'm just always...

[ sniffles ] I don't know. I'm always worried.

- And you're doing for everybody else.

For Dorinda to say she's been mean to people, this is big.

When she blows up, she can really rip you a new one,

and she's actually admitting that right now.

- Hi, Lu. - Hi.

- Hey. What's the matter? Everything okay?

- [ laughs ] I was just having a cry.

- You're having a cry? What's the matter?

- I just feel nerved up all the time and just overwhelmed.

- Wound tightly. She's spread too thin.

- Obviously, but from doing what?

- It's the house in the Berkshires.

It's renovating the... - Her new apartment.

- My new apartment.

- She said she's not being the nicest person recently.

- No, I said I'm just tired all the time.

I go to bed, and I feel like I'm not getting ahead.

- Oh, my gosh, that's so sweet.

I love everything by Jo Malone. How'd you know?

- Lucky guess, I guess. - I love candles.

You don't understand. I love candles.

- I know. Me, too.

- Thank you. - You're welcome.

- That was so considerate of you.

- You're very welcome. - No, really, seriously...

[ kisses ] that was so thoughtful.

- Of course. - Thank you.

And tell me about your hat. Is that a fashion statement?

'Cause I can't quite figure it out.

- [ laughs ] I knew someone was gonna bring it up.

I just saw it online, and I was like, "I like this,"

'cause I love bucket hats. - Right. It's interesting.

I can't... I don't know if I could pull it off.

- It's something my daughter would make fun of me

for wearing, though. - No, it's very unusual.

- You know what I mean?

And wait, I know that you were in the fashion business, too.

- Yeah, I was a buyer for Macy's.

- Wow. Okay.

- And then I opened up my own company when I was about 30.

You know, I was on my own since I was 16.

- Wow. My parents basically threw me out at 17.

Not that I didn't deserve it. I kind of did.

But they were like, "Bye."

Like, "You need to, like, figure your sh... out."

You know, too young...

- Were you doing drugs or alcohol?

- I was... Yeah, all that.

- And you were doing that because...

- I was so rebellious.

I was so angry that we moved from New York to Connecticut.

I was so depressed about it. You know...

- Well, how old were you when you moved?

- 13. - Right.

- But you know what? In hindsight, I think it actually,

like, having to deal with all this adversity kind of

gave me, like, the perseverance to, like...

- The strength of you who are.

- ...have my own company. - No, you're right.

- I mean, like who knows, like, what life has in store for us?

So... - Oh, I like your attitude.

- Yeah. - All right, well,

let's go outside. - Okay.

- Wow, this girl's okay.

But you know what? Her hat... I'm not sure if it's okay.

All right, girls, just so you know,

we're leaving here at 7:00. Do you wanna take a nap?

Why don't you take a nap? - Yeah. What time is it?

- 5. - Do you have Diet Coke?

- Yeah. It's in the fridge. - Okay, I'll go.

- ...massaging her hand, reading her...

- Is that a hat or a sun visor?

- No, it's a chamber you sit in, a pressurized chamber.

- It's a hat/sun visor. - It's amazing.

- Ramona? - What?

- You're the fashion, um, critic.

- No, me and Ramona already had the discussion about my hat.

- You're not a... you are... - Like, it's interesting.

- She runs a fashion business.

- I care if someone is criticizing my character,

but if you criticize my outfit, I don't care.

- Touché! - [ laughs ]

- Is "touché" the correct thing to say?

- Yeah. Touché. I agree.

- "Touché" is when you catch someone in a snafu,

not when you say something you agree with.

- I actually don't know. I'm not sure how to do touché.

- You were supposed to say, "Word."

- Sonja's right. - 'Cause if she said something

that Ramona agrees with, she's supposed to say, "Amen, sister!"

- No, because no one can believe that I agree with her.

I don't agree that the woman wears tattoos.

I don't mean it that way. - This is nuts.

It's not like I have a penis tattooed across my forehead

or a gun tattoo on my neck.

I have pretty, little, cute tattoos.

I have a Chanel tattoo.

I feel like everybody has tattoos.

It's not like a weird thing anymore.

- No, nobody has tattoos. - None of this group

has a tramp stamp. - I know...

I'm not sure what a "tramp stamp" is,

but it doesn't sound very nice.

I don't talk to people with tattoos.

- [ squeaks ] What? - I don't even...

- But see, I talked to her. That's why it's touché.

- Wait. What? - She knows your name,

which is amazing. - And if she forgets it,

you just need to turn around and bend over.

- Oh, my God!

- That's touché. - Whoo-hoo!

- Turn around and bend over. - That's touché.

- We just met. That is rude. Do you ever leave

your little 1%, Upper East Side bubble, ever?

- First of all, you talk to me

and Mrs. Robert Livingston Mortimer.

- Very subtle.

- She has one on the back door. You have one on the front door.

- Yeah, exactly.

- I have to take my nap if I'm going out tonight.

- Go, go, go. - You know me. I won't make it.

- You need to rest your voice, by the way.

- I know I do. I need to, like, go...

- You need to, like, chill out and rest your voice.

I'm gonna chill out for a little bit.

- All right. - Okay. So...

- How does Dorinda know that I have my name on my back?

- I told her everything. I told Dorinda everything.

- Well, at least you're honest.

- No, that's fine. - Oh, I'm unfiltered.

- I'm just wondering. - You can always trust me

to, like, [ bleep ] things up, but also, I tell you truth.

- Really? Like, I'm not with the, like...

- No, she didn't say that, did she?

- I'm not with the comments like that.

Everyone is being crazy about tattoos.

- I know. - Get over it.

- Everybody has tattoos nowadays.

I'm not... - She poked you.

- ...here to get sh... ted on by her.

Really, I'm not. I'm not the one.

- Right, right, right.

- All right, I'm going upstairs now.

Ramona's like, "Don't go! Don't go!"

But no, I think that was good. Now you three talk. Bye!

- Okay, you know when it's like... You know what? Okay...

- Oh, my God. - This is not like when

I hang out with my... My friends, my other friends,

and my daughter's friends.

They, like, clean up everything and do everything.

I didn't hire someone for today. - Okay, I'll help.

It's really beautiful here.

- I'm gonna help you, like... I'm gonna...

- Yeah, I'm gonna help, too. Come on.

- Just bring all this stuff in. - Yeah.

- Just bring it all in. I'm not doing anything now.

Just bring it all in. I mean, I loaded the dishwasher.

There's another dishwasher. I'm just gonna sit here.

I'm not doing anything.

- I'm gonna go... Aah!

- It's okay. - All right.

- I'll pick it up later. Oh, these girls, these girls.

They don't know how to entertain.

They don't have to do sh...

I mean, really?

- Coming up...

- So you don't feel you've been angry with Leah?

- "A," I could barely recognize this girl in a lineup,

which she probably was in.

♪♪♪♪♪

♪♪♪♪♪

- Hi, my love. How was school?

Because Blake texted me, saying that you were upset,

and I was, like, having a breakdown about it.

- You have Jessica in your class.

- No, I... believe me, I do get it,

and that's very disappointing.

So there's, like, no other kids in your class that you like?

- Honey, I don't know if you have a choice.

You might have to make the best of it.

I understand what it's like if someone says,

"You don't fit in with us."

In Catholic school I was, like,

the weird girl that lived downtown,

and I'm all of a sudden that again.

All right, well, it's the first day.

Let's see how it goes, okay?

I love you.

Bye.

- Mmm, little baby. Mmm, I love you. [ chuckles ]

- Love you more.

- Love you more. Bye! Love you more! Bye!

Okay.

- What did I tell Dorinda...

- ...about Leah's tattoo and stuff, because...

- Because I thought it would be shocking and funny,

because I wanted to kinda... - I know, but then...

But now Leah's, like, hurt, because it seemed like Dorinda

was sort of being mean to her about the tattoo.

- Dorinda told me she's got a lot on her plate,

and she's very angry, and she's been taking it out on people.

She admits it herself.

- You can't make excuses

for people, like, being mean to people.

- No, I wanna be there for Dorinda right now

because she is going through a rough time.

- You're fine. You have Princess Leah.

- But I also have you, and you're also my friend.

- And Dorinda's your friend. - But...

- She's just been bitchy recently.

- Well, for several months. [ knocks on door ]

- Hi. - Hi!

- Oh, my God. I love the looks of that.

- We're talking about how to get comfortable...

- The negative vibes?

- ...with each other right now, because they... they're friends.

- But hold on a second.

The only person who's making things uncomfortable...

It's not her. It's not me.

- She's in a very bad spot right now.

- She said to me...

She said she's in a bad place right now.

- Guess what? - She's... she said she's being...

- Guess what? - ...mean to people.

- I'm in a... ing bad place, too.

I miss my kid. I found out... - She told me...

- ...that she had a bad day at school.

I'm dealing with a lot of sh... too.

- She's been bitchy, she says. - Okay, fine, well, look...

- She admits it.

I'm gonna just be there for Dorinda.

I know that she's in a tough place right now,

so I wanna protect her.

All right, we're gonna get ready. See you in a minute!

Mwah! - Okay. All right. Bye.

- Thanks for fixing my lashes. Bye.

- What? - Like, what's happening?

- Oh, God. Maybe I needed to tell her to shut up.

- She won't. - [ laughs ]

- Good luck. Good luck.

- Dorin? - Yeah?

- Do you have a hairbrush? I forgot my brush.

- I sure do.

- Oh, your room smells so good. Look at you.

- All right, girls, are you all ready?

- Coming!

- Did you bring my bag?

- Look at that, Ramona. We both have bellbottoms on.

- And wait, I'm almost as tall as you, for the first time,

'cause I'm usually like this... "Oh, Ramona."

- [ laughs ] Now I'm like, "Wow!"

- So I go down to do my eyelashes with Tinsley,

and you said you were gonna make it nice with Leah.

- Okay, what'd I do? - She says, "Dorinda told me,

'Well, nobody in this group has tattoos, '"

and I go, "She didn't say that."

- I said none of us have tattoos, but we don't.

When I was growing up,

people with tattoos were going to kidnap you.

My mother told me that, and I believed her.

- So you don't feel you've been angry with her?

- Can I tell you something?

"A," I could barely recognize this girl in a lineup,

which she probably was in.

And second of all, I haven't heard her voice,

so I could neither recognize her visually

or whatever this is called.

- Uh, yeah... No, I get it. - What's it called?

Uh, "auratorally."

- Let's rock-n-roll!

- Dorin? - [ singsongy ] We're coming!

- Okay.

- Boy, I took a nice nap. - Oh, boy.

- You did? - Oh! By the way...

- All right, we got two cars. Let's go.

- I didn't say anything... - Let's go. Let's go. Leah, me...

- ...that you... I mean, I understand you told Sonja

that you have a short fuse.

You can have a short fuse all you want. It's just a fact.

She doesn't have a tattoo. She doesn't have a tattoo...

- No, no, no, it wasn't about that.

- I don't have a tattoo.

- It was more about the if someone doesn't remember

your name, you can just bend over, and they can look at it.

That's all. - I thought it was funny. Sorry.

- Well, I think it's... - Sorry.

- ...your delivery. - I'm sorry.

- You know what I mean?

- Well, talk to Tinsley about it. No, there's not.

- Of course there is. - I thought it was funny.

- I missed it. What... what...

- She said you have a tramp stamp on your back,

so when people are... ing you, they know who you are.

- Oh, sh... You know... - That's what Sonja said.

And I said... I... - It's a little hostile.

- Okay, Sonja said...

Shh, shh, you don't need to talk.

- There's a hostility right now, and it's just, like, a little...

- You don't need to talk. - I actually do need to talk.

- You don't need to talk. - Well, you know what, Sonja?

Once again, job well done. - Yeah, good try, Sonja.

You are not helping the situation at all.

- 'Cause I was... - Can I talk to you?

Do you have a voice? - I totally have a voice.

- Well, then don't... Don't let her do it.

- But you haven't taken the time to talk to me.

- All right, can we talk... Can we continue later?

- Like, I just feel like we haven't had

that many conversations. You know what I mean?

- Absolutely, so don't make generalizations about me.

- You're making the generalizations about me.

- I couldn't pick you out in a lineup. I don't know you.

- I don't even know what that means.

- I don't know you. - Exactly.

I don't feel like you would like to get to know me.

- Okay. - I hope I'm wrong.

- Why don't we do it over dinner?

- Okay. - Let's, like, start over.

- Let's get to know each other at dinner.

- Two cars. You're coming with me and Luann.

- Where do you want me?

- You're gonna be with me and Leah.

- All right.

- My underwear's in a twist. What else is new?

- Uh-oh. - Jesus Christ.

- [ laughs ] - Come on, Tins.

- Sonja, what did you tell this girl?

- [ laughs ] Oh, my God. I might end up drinking.

- I'll get you out of the crossfire for a little bit.

- Oh, my God, Luann. Help me, Luann.

- Oh, God. I know. No, no, no, it's not the answer.

- It's not. Drinking would make things really crazy.

- Yeah, but I think you guys got off on the wrong foot.

- I mean, what happened?

- Sonja was talking to Tinsley and me, and I said

that I thought it was... ed up that she said it.

- Okay.

- And then Sonja went back and told her.

- Of course. Oh, Sonja's the repeater.

- Which is fine with me,

'cause it's nothing I wouldn't say to Dorinda.

- Right.

- But, like, I literally haven't had a conversation with her,

and just didn't wanna bring it up right now.

- Ay-yi-yi.

- But aside from that, it's going great.

- [ laughs ]

- Coming up...

- Are you here, or are you sort of here?

- I got a lot of ...ing friends. Excuse me.

- I know, but okay, so do I.

You're not being present. Just be present with us.

♪♪♪♪♪

♪♪♪♪♪

- Thank you. - Smart to wear flats.

- What? - You're smart to wear flats.

- I've been to a smaller tutto, or "tuttu" or...

- Me, too. I only know the smaller one.

- This is amazing. - Wow.

- Love it. - Oh, I love this place.

Reminds me of Greece.

[ indistinct conversations ] - Ramona! Ramona!

- Hi!

- Oh, my God. [ laughs ] - This is my place. I love it.

- You're so funny. - I know.

- Ramona thinks she's socializing,

but you're not a social- "light."

You're social... ing heavy.

- Hi, Ramona. - I'm Christina.

- Christina, lovely to see you. How are you?

- "Hi! Do you see I'm here? I come here all the time.

I know the maître d'. I know the manager."

- Oh, my God, my other girlfriend. Hi!

- "What can you do for me?

Well, I'll tell you what I can do for you."

It's like, why don't you move to L.A.?

That's what they do over there. This is New York.

Act like a New Yorker. - So when do you come here?

- So I just ran into two of my girlfriends.

- Come stai?

- Ladies, what kind of water would you like to drink?

- I want flat... - Oh, God! Is this...

Is that a bathing suit? - My other bra was too tight.

- You don't have to flash the waiter.

- I need a snatch guard. I need a boob guard.

- Flat water. - Flat water?

- Can you make a mocktail for me?

- The Cetriolo looks good.

- Yeah? Is it light?

- Cucumber juice, elderflower.

- Oh, that sounds good. - Are you into that?

- Yeah. - So we want virgin Cetriolo.

- It's nice to have a wingman who's confident enough

to order a mocktail, because it's tough to be around

all these ladies drinking all weekend.

- All right, here we go.

- Oh, we only do cocktails. - Ohh!

- 'Cause we also need hot water, lemon, and honey

for my friend Tinsley, 'cause she can't speak.

We'll see. Thank you very much.

- Ramona, this is your...

- Oh, that's my Ramona drink, yes.

- All right, make a toast.

- All right, so I wanted to make a toast.

This year has been, like, the roughest thing

that I've ever been through in my life.

- This is the glass going down. [ laughs ]

- Yeah, we can put it down for a sec.

- You know, it's like, um, a volcano...

- Erupting. - ...erupted,

and all the ashes came out, and I was so busy

taking care of myself that I didn't realize that the ashes

also fell on you guys. Do you know what I mean?

- Oh, yes.

- You got hit with the ashes, too...

- I like an analogy. - ...because it became...

It became where the dust came on you,

and you didn't know what to do, how to react.

Do I drink? Do I not drink? And I didn't realize

how much it really did weigh on you guys, too.

Do you know what I mean? - Yeah.

- Because I was so busy trying to take care of myself.

And as I'm going through this recovery...

- Healing process. - Renewal.

- ...and healing and renewal,

I've realized I wanted to make amends to you all

and say how much I love you.

- Oh, my gosh. - And that...

- Oh, my God, love you, too. - We love you, too.

- It's not been easy. It's been a whole ride.

And thank you for being there for me.

- New and improved Lu.

Definitely something had to be said.

Otherwise, it was like the elephant in the room.

And I'm so glad that she had the respect to do that for us.

- Excuse me. - Which one is that?

- What is this? - Octopus.

- This is the octopus, right? - Oh, this is nice.

- You want some of this? - I would love some.

- It's unbelievable. Here. - Just one little scoop.

I'm dying to try this. - This is the best...

[ cellphone rings ]

- My girlfriend Lori.

Hey, Lori, I'm in the Hamptons. Where are you?

So come over and say hello. Come over.

- Between the two... - Are you here or are you

sort of here, floating... - No, she's never...

- My friends are calling me.

- I know, but you're here with your friends here.

- I've got a lot of ...ing friends. Excuse me.

- I know, but okay, so do I. So do you.

But tonight, we're having a dinner together.

- She just called me. - I think that's rude.

- I feel like we're being ignored.

- Yeah, we are. You're not being present.

- Just be present with us. That'd be great.

- I am present. - I mean, even your chair

- Yeah. Yeah. - ...is, like, facing outward.

- Just, like, you know...

- I'm kinda embraced towards her.

- [ laughing ] - I'm bonding.

- My new best... one of my best younger friends.

- My best friend!

- I am social, and I have a problem.

I'm not an alcoholic. I'm too social!

I got a problem, Doctor!

How can we fix it?

How can you socialize too much?

Okay, I'm a single woman. I don't have a man in my life.

I need to be social. I mean, get over it.

I like to have my friends meet new friends...

- You know, replacements, basically, for us.

- Not replacements. It's called extension.

- You said we're old and done. You want younger friends.

- You know what?

- Sonja, you talk from a double mouth.

- I think Sonja... Sonja, I need to...

I think Sonja was stirring the pot this afternoon.

- No. - Uh-oh.

- I think Leah misunderstood you.

Dorinda does wanna get to know you.

- You don't stir the drink. You stir the pot.

- No, I don't.

- Oh, you... Look at that smirk on her face.

Look at that. Look at that. Okay, look at her smirk.

- Next time, I will just speak to Dorinda directly.

- That's good. There you go. - Right.

- I'm not that offended by the tramp stamp comment.

It's not the worst thing that someone's ever said to me.

But, Dorinda girl, I got my eye on you now.

It's gonna be gone soon,

so enjoy the tramp stamp while it's here.

- I love it. [ laughs ]

- She's the one that talked about your tramp stamp.

- I know. She's obsessed with tramp stamps and my tattoos.

- I don't need a tramp stamp to be a tramp, okay, so I love it.

- I was unfair in my judgment of Leah.

She seems to hold her own, which I like,

tattoos and all.

- So did you scope out the room for us?

- Scope out the room? Do you want me to?

- I count on you girls to scope the room.

- I'm good at scoping. - I know!

- Do you want me to scoop it? - Yeah, scope it.

- Okay. - Should I... Okay, I'll do a lap.

- Scope, do a lap. - I'll do a lap.

- She's gonna do a lap! - Are you gonna do a lap?

You would think by now that the whole town

must have Ramona's digits.

Go and check out the room. - Do that fluff flip.

[ laughs ] Fluff that hair.

- Yes! - Get it working.

- She puts on her Ramona costume,

with the tit plate out... [ laughs ]

and goes out, like, to war. [ military drums beating ]

- I'm gonna scope out the room for u.

- Looking good. - All right.

- She's unbelievable, bitch. - There she goes.

- Look at her go. [ laughs ]

- There she goes. - Oh, my God!

- I need Ramona to lay up the shot. [ laughs ]

- God help those men in there.

- Next time on...

- After 24 hours, we've already gotten her to drink.

Nervous?

- Just because we're in a $30 million house,

you don't have to act like... - 39 million.

A 39.9 million. - ...a $39 million bitch.

Less acting very fancy. - Aah!

I feel like a sexy... Oh, sh...! What's going on?

- Whoo!

- I was never a trophy wife! - Listen...

- I'm not arm candy! - You know what?

- I don't shave my pussy!

- Luann's left.

- "You proclaim you love me, but I know that's not true."

Good night, from the lower level."

Subtitles Diego Moraes(oakislandtk) www.opensubtitles.org