Original subtitles

- Hmm. - Hmm!

- Hmm.

- You ever see this before?

- Dude stuck upside-down in the vent of a condom truck?

No. This is a first.

- Yeah, so I just talked to that girl

in the pink dress back there.

She and this guy were in a car,

about to have sex, but they didn't have a condom.

So he saw the truck and tried to climb on top

and it just rolled down the hill until it hit this tree.

- Truck must've had some kind of special protection

to prevent an accident.

[all laughing] - Ha.

- I guess that explains all the rubberneckers.

[laughter]

- We need to get this dick out

before he causes more damage.

- This whole thing is really inconceivable.

- Come on, probee, let's quit with the ribbing.

[all chuckle] - I bet you he's, uh...

♪

- Come on, man.

- I bet... - This is all you, Ike.

- You got it, baby. - Oh, you're waiting for me?

I, uh, I don't have one.

- Well, if you try hard enough, it'll come.

[all laugh]

- All right. Let's go. Let's bust a nut.

[clang] - Let me out of here!

[loud clang]

[boxes thump]

- This truck just spilled its load.

- I guess that's where the rubbers meet the road.

[all chuckle]

- Come on! Somebody!

- Still nothing. - Ike, it's condom puns.

- I'm so sorry, guys.

- Just work. - Uh. I'm gonna...

- It's disappointing.

- [shouts]

- Congratulations! It's a boy!

- [laughs]

- There you go, sir.

- Dust him off.

All right fellas, we got this all wrapped up.

All: Whoa! Hey!

- What? - "Wrapped up."

- What do you mean? - Come on.

- Come on, guys.

Honestly, I'm ultrasensitive today.

All: Oh! - There's one!

- That's gotta be one. - One what?

- I can't tell if he's serious.

- One what? [screaming] Wait, guys! What?

[screaming] Guys, what?

[Foreigner's "Hot Blooded"]

♪ ♪

♪ Well, I'm hot-blooded ♪

♪ Check it and see ♪

♪ I've got a fever of 103 ♪

♪ I'm hot-blooded ♪

♪

- At long last, your party arrives

at the lowest level of the lost mine

of the Androsphinx.

[whispering] The area is eerily quiet.

There's a stench of dead creatures all around.

You come to a locked wooden door.

What do you do?

- Let's break it down. - Yes.

- Yeah. Break it down. - What do you use?

- [snorts] An ax. - Agreed.

- As you deliberate,

a gas ogre comes bursting through the door

and lets out a grotesque roar.

- Hey!

That squirrel you ran over on Tuesday is still out there.

Go clean it up!

I didn't run it over, you ran it over.

- Don't you throw me under the bus.

You ran over it.

You go clean it up. - Oh, man.

Myawani, clean up that squirrel.

- Wait, why do I have to clean up the squirrel?

- In the interest of saving time, dungeon master,

I could go out and clean up said squirrel

while you prepare for us to murder this gas ogre.

- That would be wonderful.

- If it pleases dungeon master.

- Thanks, Ike. I will remember that. [laughs]

- Chief, Chief. Terry, Terry, Terry.

Hey, where we going for your daughter's graduation dinner?

- Oh, Bleeder's Steakhouse.

- Really? Bleeder's? - Yeah.

- Isn't that your favorite restaurant?

- Yeah, baby. Prime rib.

- Yeah, but it's your daughter's dinner.

I know her first choice isn't Bleeder's.

- Well, I'm paying, so I'm choosing.

- Terry, the name is unappetizing.

- What do you want me to do?

The owner's name is Jimmy Bleeder.

- Yeah, but it's gross.

- So you want the guy to change the name of his restaurant

to make you more comfortable?

- I am certain you know what I mean.

- No, I don't.

The name of the place is Bleeder's.

Bleeder's Steakhouse.

That's where we're going. And I'm paying.

[tires squealing]

Oh, shit. It's the commissioner.

- Why would he come unannounced?

- Okay. I don't know. I don't know.

♪ ♪

- Hello, Commissioner.

- Hello, Dad.

♪ ♪

- Inside. Office. Now.

♪

- Uh...

- Sit down.

About a week ago,

a guy broke in to a condom truck.

- Rescued him.

- He's suing the city for 125 mil.

- What? Guy was a thief.

- He's not gonna win.

But here's the thing.

When there's a lawsuit,

the incident report goes public.

"Condom truck extrication incident report

"by Edward Penisi, Jr.

"It was a wet and stormy night.

"A raincoat was needed.

"Luckily, we came upon

a condom truck."

Blah-blah-blah. "Sticky situation."

Blah-blah-blah.

"Erected a ladder."

Blah-blah-blah.

"Penetrated the back door."

Blah. Blah. Blah.

- Boy, that really sings, huh?

- [laughs sarcastically]

[laughs angrily]

The mayor's up my ass!

Because you're my son

and you're my son-in-law,

and when they read this thing,

the TFD is going to look like a bunch of idiots!

- [laughing] I told you a million times

not to screw around on your reports. [laughs]

- You read it, right?

- I did, but I thought it was a joke,

'cause you're always joking.

- If you thought it was a joke, why did you submit it?

Unless you weren't doing your job. [chuckling]

- It's not my job to rein in my captain.

[both laughing] - Enough!

I pulled a bunch of reports from "A" Shift.

They all stink!

Lucy's are actually fantastic,

but Ike Crystal, he writes like a third-grader.

Granville Smith,

guy thinks he's F. Scott Fitzgerald.

Andy...

[stammering] My--mayor--mywa--

- Myawani. - He hasn't done his reports

in a month!

The punishment:

everyone but Lucy

will redo their reports for the last two weeks.

- Oh, come on. All of them?

- Yeah. All of them.

- Okay, okay.

Thank you very much, sir.

- I'm not done.

What's this about a graduation dinner tonight?

- Uh...it's happening?

Vicky told me about it this morning.

You didn't invite me.

The grandfather.

- That's weird. I sent out an e-vite.

Did you not get the e-vite? - I did not.

Maybe because I don't know what an e-vite is.

How about an invite?

Like in my fucking mailbox

or in my fucking ear.

- Maybe check your spam folder?

- Well. I'll be there.

And I'm paying.

No, no, it's my daughter's dinner.

I'm paying. - I'm the patriarch.

I pay.

- I'm the patriarch of my daughter.

So I'm paying.

- I'm paying. Now get out.

I gotta make a phone call.

- This is my office. - It was mine first.

[door latches shut]

Why you gotta throw me under the bus?

- You did it first. - I hate it when he's here.

- Will you stick up for yourself?

He neuters you every time. - He didn't neuter me.

- He just kicked you out of your office.

That's a neutering. - No, it's not!

- Hey, Terry. I'm gonna go to my office.

What are you gonna do?

- Fuck you. - Yeah.

♪ ♪

- As you open the gas ogre's treasure chest,

the party member in the rear of the formation

finds something.

- That's me. I'm in the rear.

- [scoffs] - Yes, Ike the Sweet.

And you find... [dice thud]

A Helmet of Telekinesis.

- Oh, sweet! - Oh...

- I see the future, right?

- I guess it pays

to clean up the dungeon master's dead squirrel, huh?

- Currying favors for the dungeon master

is always a good idea.

- Attention on deck! Commissioner Penisi.

- Hi! - Look at this beautiful girl.

- Aw, hi, Gampy.

- That's "Commissioner Gampy" to you.

At ease, men. Sit.

What's this? - Dungeons & Dragons, sir.

- Is it a board game?

- Kind of, yeah. Right.

- Funny-looking dice.

Is it a gambling game?

- Oh, no, no, no. Chief banned gambling, so...

- No gambling.

- You banned gambling

in my station?

- It was becoming a problem-- - Terry.

I'm lifting the ban.

- With all due respect, sir-- - I'm the commissioner.

I am unbanning gambling in this station

for the rest of historical time.

Start gambling!

What are you looking at him for? Now!

- Yeah. - I got 30 on me.

- Hey, place your bets, guys.

- That's fine. - [quietly] I don't know, man.

- Happy gambling. - Thank you, sir.

- Nice to see you again.

- Okay, you know what?

I hate to rain on your parade,

but per the commish,

the incident reports are subpar.

So everyone except Lucy has to redo their reports

from the last two weeks.

- Whoo-whoo-whoo!

- But Chief, man, I worked my ass off on mine.

- Yours read like you're trying to get a book deal.

- [laughs] - I want 'em on my desk today.

- Kay, Chief.

I guess we have to save this game for another day.

- Well, hold on.

Since I don't have anything to do,

I can help with your reports.

- Much obliged.

- I guess it does pay to please the dungeon master.

- That's right. And don't you forget it.

[chuckles]

[laughs]

[laughing loudly]

[cackling]

[cackling maniacally]

Boop.

- Campground's in flames,

and I'm searching RVs.

They're on fire.

Smoke everywhere.

Well, I ain't leaving.

That's when I hear,

"Help. Help."

It's three little kids.

- He kicked you out of your office.

And yet, here he is in the break room.

Does that piss you off? - Nope. Not at all.

- And that's when I see the propane tank on fire.

♪

I don't think.

I jump on those kids,

and boom.

My turnout was eviscerated,

my back was opened up to the spine, but...

I saved those kids.

- Wow.

Goosebump Olympics over here, right?

- No, no.

I was just doing my job.

- Wow.

- It's unbelievable.

The fire gets bigger every time.

[grumbles] "My spine. You can see my spine."

- If we could see your spine, you'd be dead.

- Show 'em your medals, Gampy.

[bell dings]

- Hey, Terry. You're not doing anything.

Why don't you leave your lemonade stand

and grab the beef out of the oven.

[quietly] - Don't do it.

- Yes, sir.

- Big mistake.

- So this is Medal of Valor,

Washington State.

National Firefighters Association.

Firefighter of the Year 1975. - There's no potholders.

- Presidential Medal of Valor, President Ford.

- You have a Presidential Medal of Valor?

- Two, actually. That one's from Reagan.

- Oh, that's hot!

Come on! - You okay, Chief?

- Potholders.

- Okay--forget-- find a potholder--

[hissing] - [grunts]

- Careful-- - What?

Whoa! [metal clangs]

- Beef tetra-Penisi. Dig in.

- This is my favorite thing he makes.

- Hey, uh, what happened to your game?

- Oh, we have to finish these reports.

Chief says they are due at the end of the day.

- No, they don't have to be done today.

Take your time. Play your game.

Oh! And remember to gamble.

[all laughing] - I love you, Gampy.

- He's so good. - He's like a superhero, right?

- I know, right? - Hey, hey.

I want those reports EOD. - Didn't you hear the commish?

He said that we don't have to do them right away.

- I said EOD.

- Terry, it's lunchtime. Come on.

- EOD!

- Okay, okay. - Chief!

- Whew...

♪

- [imitating trumpet fanfare]

Whence last we played,

Ike had found the Helmet of Telekinesis.

but Lucia has also found an item.

- Nice! - Hold up, hold up, hold up.

Why is it when people get you things or kiss your ass,

they get something?

That's cheating! - Purely coincidence.

- Well, it don't feel like coincidence.

- It's just the roll of the dice, Granny.

Oh, look. I believe it's your turn.

- Okay.

I want to search for secret doors.

- Yes. - Eh?

- Oh! Unfortunately, a grick was hiding in the corner

and attacked Grandolph,

killing him instantly.

[laughs] - That's bullshit, man!

You're corrupt! - No! Bye!

Here's a little advice.

Lucy is one level away from a resurrection spell.

Maybe if you finish my reports...

I can speed that up. [laughs]

- That's kind of an abuse of power.

- Kinda is. - That's an abuse of power?

- Kinda, I mean... - Ike!

I would love

a Le Pew sparkling water.

- No, I'm not gonna--

you're two feet away from the-- don't, don't!

Don't! Don't touch my card.

I'm going, okay?

Stop! Don't touch it.

♪ ♪

- Hey, Junior!

Junior, come here, come here, come here.

Look what I found hiding in Terry's closet.

That's every Penisi ever stationed here.

That's me, of course. - Yeah.

- Your grandpa, Giuseppe.

That's Mario before him,

Luigi,

his dad, Geppetto,

and your great-great-great- great-grandpa, Bosco.

- Good looking bunch of guys. - They're all right.

You know, you were conceived on this desk.

- No, Dad, I didn't know that.

- It was your mom's idea, may she rest in peace.

You ever have sex on this desk?

- Yeah, I did. Recently, actually.

Good height. - Right?

- Yeah. - Yeah, you see?

That's why you should be chief.

- Come on. - Terry...

he would never have sex on this desk.

- Well, he's married to your daughter, my sister.

- You know what I mean.

I mean, Terry's soft.

You're more of a chief than he is.

- Okay. - You're smarter than him.

- Yeah. - You're funnier.

- Yes. - You're better-looking.

You're more charming. - Definitely.

- You have the heart of a chief, son.

I see greatness in you.

- You do? - Someday...

This will be yours.

♪

- My precious...

- He's been disrespecting me since day one.

Remember at our wedding

when he got rid of the chicken alternative I suggested

because he wanted everyone to eat beef?

- It's a generational thing.

He calls chicken "girl meat."

- People like options at weddings.

- He doesn't.

And he was paying.

- That's a whole other thing.

The paying. I'm sick of it.

- He is a grandpa.

It makes him feel like he's still running the house.

It's not like he kicked you out of your office

or anything.

- Okay. I gotta go. Love you.

♪ ♪

- Hey, Granny. How are my reports going?

- I'm making progress.

- Oh, cool, cool. Heh.

Let me see what you got.

It's a little wordy.

It doesn't really sound like me, but...

maybe you can take another whack at it?

- [imitating Andy] "Maybe you can do it yourself.

Huh. Neh. Heh."

- Maybe I could.

But maybe Grandolph's resurrection

hits a couple of unforeseen speed bumps.

[chuckles]

I'm just kidding.

I'm sure the resurrection will be fine.

But just do a good job, okay?

[chuckles]

Okay?

- [quietly] Okay.

- You can say it like me, if you want.

Mm-kay?

Huh. You don't want to imitate me now?

That's strange.

- Mm-kay? - Okay!

- Not "okay."

Mm-kay.

♪ ♪

- I found these jammed in your closet.

That Durabran girl is hot!

And the "wake up your wife" thing,

it's hysterical! - [chuckles]

I always thought it was funny.

- By the way, your life would be a lot easier

if Eddie, Jr. wasn't there to undermine you all the time.

You think the crew respects you

when he tells fat jokes to your face?

No.

And did you know he screws on your desk?

- Screws what? Women?

- No, no. He screws furniture together.

Yes, women! - Who did he screw?

- He wouldn't say.

But talk about insubordination.

- God. I don't believe it.

- He's disgusting!

But you, I see greatness in you.

You can be commissioner someday...

if Eddie, Jr. doesn't drag you down with him.

And about the bill tonight?

You can pay. - I can?

- Absolutely. - Thanks, Commissioner.

- Call me "Dad."

- [laughing] Okay! Dad.

[laughs]

Great. - See you tonight, son.

[laughing] - That's great.

[menacing music]

- 'Sup, my nerds. Guess what?

I finished your reports.

- Your timing is excellent, Granny,

because Lucia has reached level five.

- And I would like to resurrect Grandolph.

- Oh, yes, and thank you.

[both laugh]

- This spell will consume a diamond

worth 500 gold pieces.

- I have such a diamond, Dungeon Master.

[angelic choir sings]

- I submit this diamond for Grandolph's life.

- Grandolph's soul...

♪ ♪

Can you hear me?

- [high-pitched voice] Yes...I...can...

- Are you willing to rejoin your body?

- [high-pitched voice] Yes, Dungeon Master...

- Grandolph's wounds close.

He lives!

- [gasps] Yeah!

- Oh, baby!

- Do a dance of joy.

[chuckling]

- Come again?

- Entertain me with a dance.

- Just get it over with.

- [laughs] Yes, yes.

Ellen hands, please, Ellen hands.

More Ellen.

Yes, Granny. Push the fruit.

Ah, yes, yes. Push that fruit away.

Bountiful harvest. There's too much fruit.

Push it away. - That's really weird, man.

- Push the fruit! [cackles]

- Dear God. Mercy.

- Playing Doorbells & Dingleberries?

- Oh! [stammering]

No, it's, uh--

it's Dungeons & Dragons, sir.

- Did you bet on it? - Oh, no.

Still no gambling here. - God damn it!

I said gamble! That's what firefighters do!

We gamble!

And if you're not gambling,

then you're not playing!

- Hey, what's going on in here?

- I have never seen a softer group

in my life!

This is on you two.

The captain and the chief of the pussies.

- We need to talk.

♪

I want you to go in that office and tell your father to leave.

If you want him out of your office,

you tell him, Chief.

- You're afraid. - I'm afraid?

You're soft. And by the way?

I'd be a better chief than you.

I have the heart of a chief.

- You're the one dragging me down.

- Ha! You're the chief of the pussies.

Also, if you want to pay for dinner,

you just pay.

- I am.

I told him, and he agreed. - Oh.

But that shouldn't matter to you

because you're not invited anymore.

- [laughing] Oh.

You're disinviting me? - Yeah.

Well, you be very careful right now, Terry McConky,

'cause I'll make you regret that.

- I regret inviting you in the first place.

♪ ♪

- Happy eighth grade graduation.

When your mother was in the eighth grade,

we didn't celebrate eighth grade graduation.

Didn't have cell phones, either.

But these days,

everybody's gotta have a trophy.

Am I right? - Hey.

We're ready to order. - Oh, wonderful.

- Looks like we arrived just in time.

- What are you doing here? I disinvited you.

- Yeah. Vicky re-invited me.

- How could you disinvite him?

This is a family dinner

Vicky also told me I could bring a date.

So this is Penny.

Penny is a professional competitive eater.

- Oh, like the hot dog guys?

- Yeah. She eats massive amounts of food professionally.

And she's in training.

- Nice to meet you all. - Nice to meet you.

- Hey, Penny.

- Oh, thank you.

Professional eater. [chuckles]

That's great. - I'm starving.

- Dig in.

- Ok--my bread.

[Penny chewing noisily]

Okay. That's my water.

[chuckles]

Maybe we could get her-- uh.

[chuckles]

- All right, why don't we start with the young lady?

- I will start...

[affected Italian accent] With the fried "calamar"

and raviole al spinaci.

And each of my girls will have a "spaghett" Bolognese.

- I'll also have the fried "calamar,"

followed by the veal "scallopeen"

and a personal pizza alla "pepperone."

- I'll start with the "prosciut,"

then I'll have the spaghettini alla quattro formaggio,

al dente.

- For me, a bufala "moo-zarell"

followed by a stringozzi puttanesca

with a side of risotto Parmigiano.

Ooh, let's get some gabagool for the table, hmm?

Gabagool? Gabagool? - Yeah.

- Gabagool galore. - [sighs]

- The young lady? - To start,

I'll have the left side of the menu...

- Yeah. - And for the main course,

I'll have the right side. - Wonderful.

- How about for you, sir?

- I will just have the prime rib.

And some more bread. - Okay.

- And another water.

- Hey, thanks for picking up the check.

I'll have a Dewar's Platinum.

- Want to make it a double? - Make it a double.

Great idea.

♪ ♪

- The Dungeon Master grows impatient!

- [whispering] He's nuts!

- [hushed] We've gotta take him down.

- Just having this conversation right now

could get our characters killed!

- Have you found a sub for Lucy yet?

- Not yet, Dungeon Master!

- I know.

Oh, I got it.

- What--don't-- [buzzer sounding]

- [singing in boops]

Hey, there he is.

- How goes it?

- Cool, cool. Good to see you, Tolthar.

[chuckles] You look awesome.

- I know.

- Tolthar, Granny. Granny, Tolthar.

Oh, Tolthar was with me the night that

that girl turned me into a werewolf.

- Super Blue Blood Moon.

Was a weird night. - That was a weird one.

- I woke up naked next to a Wookie.

- What? - Not a real Wookie.

A cosplay. - Aw.

Still crazy. Over here.

- Yeah. - Okay.

That's your thing, huh?

- Well, it was that night.

♪ ♪

- Andy, you remember my buddy, Tolthar.

- Oh, yeah.

So they got you to replace Lucy.

I didn't realize you played D&D.

- I dabble. - [laughs] Aw, man.

I'll try not to kill you too quickly.

- Oh, okay. Thanks.

- [chewing noisily] - So there's Terry and Junior,

and they're walking with the firefighters

in the St. Patrick's Day parade,

drunk as monkeys.

So drunk, they don't realize they're now walking

with a high school marching band.

These two, they just keep on marching.

- Hey, sweetheart.

When the check's ready, bring it to me.

- Hey, Dad, Dad, Dad. You said I could pay.

- I'm changing it up a little.

And I'm not your dad.

♪ ♪

- You enter and see the Androsphinx from behind.

It spins, surprising you.

Now, claw attack.

[dice clatter]

And it kills you all.

- Dead? - See?

- We just started!

- Nice playing with you guys.

Nice seeing you again.

- Um, if we saw the Androsphinx from behind,

how did it surprise us?

- It spun quickly?

- But if a player catches a monster from behind,

we would get the first attack.

You've read "The Dungeon Master's Guide," yes?

- Yes. I've read it.

Fine. You get first attack.

Androsphinx is basically invincible,

so...go for it.

- Okay. I cast a time stop spell.

And then I use Nolzur's Marvelous Pigments

to paint a lake around the Androsphinx

in which it drowns.

- Nice! - [imitates explosion]

- The Androsphinx can't swim.

It's dead, bitch. - Fish food, bitch.

[laughing] - Yeah!

- Anyway, enjoy splitting that treasure.

[Granny and Ike laughing]

- Oh, and lose my number, you fucking nerds.

- All right, man.

- Unless you do this again,

because I really do enjoy D&D.

- Good to see you, Tolthar! - Likewise.

- He's so good at D&D. - He really is.

- You're a dick, Andy! - You're a real dick!

- What I can't figure out is

how you're able to stand up without a backbone.

- Can you step in here? - I've had a lifetime of this.

He'll make his point soon enough.

- Hey, Vick.

Did you know that Terry

let me kick him out of his office

without putting up a fight?

- I'm sure he had his reasons.

- Oh, I'll tell you his reasons.

No balls.

Well, he's got a ball.

One ball. He's got a ball,

Eddie, Jr.'s got a ball.

Between them, they got a pair of balls.

Together: Enough! - [gulps]

- Harry lost that nut saving my life.

- And Eddie lost his nut

the second time I saved his life.

- [gasps] - Terry's a great chief.

There's no one I'd rather report to.

- And Eddie's a great captain. His crew loves him.

And there's no one I'd rather be in the trenches with.

- You know, when I showed up at work today,

I saw a chief and a captain

who loved to throw each other under the bus,

neither acting like a leader.

So I devised a plan...

- [choking silently] - To make me your common enemy,

hoping that you'd band together,

and look what happened.

You're acting like a team.

Looks like I did my job again.

You're supporting each other.

You'll be better men, now.

You're welcome.

- [chokes] [bone whooshes]

- Oh! [both gasp]

- Wanna get out of here? - I thought you'd never ask.

- You got room for a hot dog?

- As long as I soak it in water.

[both laugh] - That's gross.

- What is happening?

- Two things.

You're paying for dinner.

And I'm Eddie Penisi.

- ♪ Eddie Senior!

- [together] Son of a bitch.

- I'll just leave this here. Take your time.

- Oh.

Wanna split it? - Nope.

♪

- The fog takes the form

of a female nothic.

[high-pitched voice] You may ask one question of me,

and one question only!

- Hey, I've got a question.

When can I play with you guys again?

- Did you wash my car? Did you do her laundry?

Did you shine his shoes? - Yes.

- Why don't you start on our station tasks?

Is that cool with you, Cap?

- Yeah, you know, I'll defer to the chief on this one,

since he's in charge of this house.

- This is Cap's shift.

I defer to him, and I support his decision.

- No, sir, please. You decide.

- No. Whatever's cool with him is cool with me.

- Okay.

Then Andy can do everyone's tasks.

- [laughs loudly]

- I really like our new synergy.

- The station really hums when we support each other.

- Doesn't it? - Yeah.

Speaking of humming...

did you have sex on my desk?

- In light of our new, honest relationship,

yes, I did.

- Son of a bitch, Eddie.

That's sacred ground in there.

You don't have sex on the chief's desk.

- Somebody's got to do it. - Who was it?

- You know I don't kiss and tell.

- Was it that woman from Animal Control?

- That was in your car. I really should call her.

- Angela the ambulance driver.

- That was on your couch at Christmastime.

I should call her, too.

- Patty from the tax office.

- That was in your garage on St. Paddy's Day.

Ha! I'm not calling her.

- Who was it? - I'm not telling.

- Tell me. - I'm not telling.

- This relationship is over!

- Ask me if I care.

- You don't care about anything but yourself.

- I don't care about shit.

- That's exactly what I'm talking about!

- I like it when things go back to normal.

It feels like all is right in the world.

Oh! Critical hit!

- You're gonna wash my desk!

- Andy, go wash Chief's desk. Now.