Original subtitles

[theme music]

Alex. Alex, I'm going to be showing six Mexican teachers

around the school next week.

Tell me, how does this sound?

[speaking in foreign language]

Good, good..

But you know, you just welcomed six donkeys to the library.

I'll have to fix that.

Ah, Senor Moore!

Uh, since I'm going to be pretty busy with my Hispanic compadres

I would appreciate you taking over as coach

of the academic team.

Fine, uh, if you'll get me out of two weeks lunch room duty.

You got it!

I knew it, should have asked for three.

[bell ringing]

- Hey. - Excuse me.

Dr. Samuels, Mr. Freelik is here.

The recruiter from Harvard?

And he needs to know how long to schedule the interviews

for the IHP kids.

Fifteen minutes.

Alan, I hardly think that's enough time

for all the interviews.

It's all the time I'll need.

Once he meets me, he won't need to talk to anyone else.

You know what, Alan, one day, that attitude of yours

is gonna get you into a lot of trouble.

- Yeah! - Maybe.

But today, it's gonna get me into Harvard.

[upbeat music]

[instrumental music]

I have to phone my mom and tell her the good news.

What good news? You haven't even met the guy yet.

No problem, he'll love me.

I wouldn't go to Harvard if you begged me.

- Oh, yeah, sure. - What?

The whole place reeks of elitism

privilege, snobbism and materialism.

- So, where are you going? - Yale.

[scoffs]

The drama school, fool.

Jack, I feel as long as I'm in New York

it only makes sense to go for trout.

Yeah, alright, alright, I'll meet you in Roscoe

and then we'll fish the Beaver Kill.

- E-excuse me, could I use-- - Almost done, almost done.

Yes, oh, alright, I-I brought everything

including my new graphite rod.

And no, you may not borrow it.

I-if you wouldn't mind, sir, I would like to use..

Alright, alright, I'll bring an extra rod.

I'll-I'll bring the, uh, Western Series Freestone, alright?

Well, I should be out of here by about, uh, 2:00.

Oh, they've got some very bright kids here.

But you know Harvard, we only take, uh, the cream of the crop.

[chuckles] Well, after this I have to go to Bronx Science, and..

It's in the Bronx.

Yes.

Well, you have quite an impressive record here

Mr. Pinkard.

You know, it's so refreshing to see someone

who not only has a high IQ, but knows how to use it.

[chuckles] Well, I always like to say

"You can have the finest Western Series Freestone rod..

...but if you don't know how to use it, what's the point?"

You know the Western Series Freestone?

[scoffs] I wouldn't step into the Beaver Kill River without it.

You know the Beaver Kill?

Oh, if you know fly fishing, you know the Beaver Kill.

Yes, yeah!

- Sir, can I be honest with you? - Mmm-hmm.

All my life, I've wanted to go to Harvard.

It's the best. There's nothing like it.

Cambridge, the Coop, Harvard Yard, Elliott House.

I've dreamed of it.

But I have a confession to make.

There's one other reason why I want to go to Harvard.

Yes.

I wanna fish the Upper Piscataquas River.

You know the Piscataquas?

Well, it's nothing I would put on my application form, but..

...somehow, I...I just felt I could tell you.

Tell me? Why, it's music to my ears.

You remind me of the son I never had.

Thank you, sir.

Well, I've seen enough here, you're ready to go to Harvard.

- I am? - Mmm-hmm.

- I am! - Yes.

Now, this isn't our regular policy

but I'm going to recommend early admission.

You could move on campus and start classes immediately.

Oh, well, I'm, I'm speechless.

I haven't felt this way since I caught my first walleye.

Well, glad to help you reel it in, son.

I'll just speak to the Admissions Committee

and then, you and I have a date with the Piscataquas River.

[instrumental music]

Alan, Harvard, congratulations.

I'm-I'm sure you're gonna be really happy there.

Well, thanks, Arvid.

And I'm sure you'll be happy

when you eventually get to, uh, Caltech.

Wh-wh-what's wrong with Caltech?

Oh-oh, nothing, nothing, uh

you'll be comfortable there, you know, with your own sort.

My-my-my own sort?

Well, as for me, it's time to move on.

I've accomplished all of my goals here.

Except for one.

You've just been kissed by a Harvard man.

You're about to get kneed by a high school girl.

[bell ringing]

Good morning, everyone.

- 'Good morning.' - 'Good morning, Mr. Moore.'

Congratulations, Alan.

You'll do very well at Harvard.

[chuckles] Tell me about it.

[instrumental music]

Okay, let's take our seats and get started, shall we?

Yo, man, this is a drag, I got plans.

Eric, you've got to live up to your responsibilities.

Me, I'm moving on to bigger and better things.

- And you're my sub. - I'm not your sub, I'm the sub.

Okay, "The sub." Happy? That is so childish.

Mr. Moore, before we begin

there is something I would like to say.

Okay. Uh, listen, everybody, uh..

Alan has something he wants to say.

[all groan]

Mr. Moore, members of the academic team

it is with a heavy heart and great reluctance

that I, as your captain--

Uh, Alan, is this a resignation speech?

Oh, yes, as a matter of fact, it is.

We don't wanna hear it.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. At least let him finish.

Mr. Moore, we've had to listen to him

resign from the debate team, resign from the newspaper.

And the student council.

He even made a speech when he turned in his bus pass.

I'm saying farewell to the people and places

that are important to me.

So why are you bothering us?

Just say goodbye to your accountant and your mirror.

Yeah, Alan, I mean, you're going to Harvard. Yippee.

Who cares, man? Get lost. Take a hike.

Do I detect some envy here?

Well, let's just clear the air right now.

Excuse me, Alan, uh, I think the air is fairly clear.

You're right, Mr. Moore.

I was merely going to very graciously hand over my position

as captain of the academic team to Darlene.

You know, Darlene, in a way, I envy you.

I mean, here I am, moving on to adulthood, and..

...you'll still be enjoying the childlike simplicity

of your wonder years.

Alan, that's, that's a little patronizing.

Well, hey, I was trying to be gracious.

Well, you're failing miserably.

Et tu, Simone? That hurts.

You know, I might as well tell you this now

that it doesn't matter anymore.

For many years, I had a major crush on you.

'I wrote you love poems I could never send.'

'I kissed your picture in the yearbook.'

But then I began to agree with what Sarah and Darlene

said about you.

What?

(Alan) 'Your little Miss Goody Two-Shoes act'

was just a put on.

You know how I figured it out?

You got the hots for Eric, Mr. Stud.

Oh, sure, I was jealous at first but how can I be mad at Eric?

He's a loser, but I love the guy.

Excuse me, "Loser?"

Oh, I'm just saying, you're probably not going to do

well in life, but hey, it's okay, it's not a crime.

Alan, uh..

Look at Dennis.

He's great.

Smart, funny..

...but there's something unattractive about him.

I mean, he has to scrape the bottom of the barrel for friends

and, and he could only find one.

Oh, hey, hey, hey, you're talking about my best..

(Alan) 'Arvid, Arvid, Arvid, Arvid.'

It's not your fault. We're all to blame.

[scoffs] I remember looking at you in junior high

and saying to myself

"My God, he's turning into a nerd."

I didn't do anything to stop it, I just watched it happen.

And I'm sorry.

Are you finished?

Yeah! Are you done?

Yes.

[both scoff]

As for you new kids..

Oh, I know.. Don't tell me, I know you're upset.

It's only natural.

Didn't get a chance to know me.

Anyway, uh, where was I?

Uh, I-I.. Alan, heh...could we step over here for a moment?

I wasn't finished with my resignation speech.

No, you are finished, believe me.

If-if I could offer you just a couple of words of advice..

Mr. Moore, now that I'm leaving

it's given me a certain perspective.

Now, don't take this the wrong way, but..

...I've noticed your advice sometimes

creates more problems than it solves.

Is there a wrong way to take that?

[chuckles] I'm just suggesting that

you're too involved in your students' lives.

I mean, they're growing up.

So let them.

Hey, just one man's opinion, think about it.

Oh, Alan, good, I found you.

Listen, Dr. Samuels wants to see you

in his office right away.

[scoffs] Oh, that Harold.

He probably wants to say goodbye and give me another hug.

I hope he doesn't cry again.

Thanks, dear.

"Dear?"

[knocking on door]

[speaking in foreign language]

I'm afraid I've just received some very bad news.

Sir?

There's a problem with your going to Harvard.

What?

There's been a freak accident.

Harvard blew up?

No, Mr. Freelik, he's dead.

Hasta la vista.

[instrumental music]

It's true. He was fishing in the Beaver Kills

fell off a rock, and ay, caramba.

That's terrible.

Yeah, he never got a chance to tell Harvard

of his desire to get you in.

Didn't he leave a will?

You don't comprendo?

The man drowned this morning.

He's still wet.

This is totally unfair.

Wait a minute, what about Mrs. Freelik?

What about her?

Well, I'm sure she'd wanna honor her husband's last wish.

His last wish was probably for a life jacket.

[instrumental music]

Okay, question one, biology.

"Name the phylum of animals with a two-valved shell."

Mr. Moore, what is Alan doing here?

- 'Yeah.' - 'Yeah.'

It's a good question, why not ask him?

- What are you doing here? - What are you doing here, Alan?

Well, uh, well, I've just been rethinking a few things

I said in my resignation speech.

Go suck a tomato, Alan.

I deserve that.

Can I be honest?

Oh, no, not again.

Once a lifetime is enough.

Please.

I got carried away with Harvard.

Simone..

...I'm sorry I called you a Goody Two-Shoes.

'And, Sarah and Darlene, I'm..'

'...sorry I got you in trouble with Simone.'

I didn't mean to single you out.

Everybody says that about her.

And-and-and, Eric..

...when I called you a loser, I meant only in this class

but compared to the rest of the world, you're a winner.

'And, and..'

Arvid!

Arvid, are you any more of a social outcast than moi?

'I don't think so.'

It was just my infantile need to put someone else down

to make myself feel better.

Surely, Dennis, you can understand that.

Well, yeah..

I'm sorry, this isn't coming out right.

I'm usually the most articulate one in the class.

I guess humility isn't my forte.

What am I trying to say here?

I think you're trying to say you're sorry.

Oh, that's it.

I-I'm trying to apologize to everyone.

'All of that stuff I said, I didn't mean it.'

Oh, come on, senator.

You said it, we heard it, you meant it, forget about it.

Yeah, Alan, why should we forgive you?

It's not like you're gonna be around here much longer anyway.

- 'Yeah, that's right.' - Yeah, that's right.

Well, I, uh..

I guess I'm in the way here.

Mr. Moore, I hope you know I regret what I said to you.

I know, Alan. Thank you.

Nice torpedo job on Alan.

- Oh, come on.. - Oh, come on, Mr. Moore.

Are you forgetting what he dropped on all of us?

- Yeah. - Yeah.

He just walked back in here.

He was eating a jumbo grilled sandwich.

Yeah, I'd like to know what that nice act was all about.

- 'Yeah.' - Yeah, come on, Mr. Moore.

He was obviously patronizing us.

Maybe he would like to leave Fillmore

feeling that you're still friends.

Alan said some things that you can't excuse.

Like things that you said to Alex

when you thought he stole your ring?

I mean, we-we've all said things that we regret.

It's just that Alan elevates it to an art form.

I-I-I think his apologies were sincere.

I mean, is this really the way you wanna

send him off to Harvard?

No, we'd rather slap some stamps on his forehead

and stuff him in a mailbox.

Come on, come on. Think about how far you've come together.

Think about all the experiences that you've shared with Alan.

Think about what he's meant in your life.

Okay, okay. Uh..

In spite of that, couldn't you be nice to him?

[instrumental music]

Senor Moore, just the man I wanted to see.

How is Alan taking this whole Harvard thing?

Well, at first, he was really excited about going, and..

...now, everyone else is really excited about him going.

Where's he going?

Harvard.

Is he going up for el funerale?

What "El funerale?"

Didn't Alan tell you? Mr. Freelik died.

Taking with him Alan's chances for an early admission.

El kaputo.

[instrumental music]

- Good morning, Alan. - Hi.

Uh, listen, uh, you got a minute before class?

Sure, got all the time in the world.

I guess that's true since Mr. Freelik

sleeps with the fishes.

- You know? - Yeah. Sorry.

How am I gonna tell everybody I'm not going to Harvard?

I don't know. I'm glad I'm not you.

Well, I was planning on waiting until I get back

into everybody's good graces, and then tell them.

Well, the longer you wait, the harder that's gonna be.

I-I promise, the moment they start to like me again

I'll tell them.

You have a plan B?

[sighs]

You're right, it's, uh, time to face the music.

Yeah.

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow ♪

♪ Which nobody can deny ♪♪

[applauding]

- Me? A jolly good fellow? - Yeah, likeable, too.

Alan, we want you to know that we forgive you.

- And we'll miss you. - 'Yeah.'

[chuckles] Well, I, uh..

- We've even brought you gifts. - 'Yeah!'

Oh, no, not gifts, too.

That's what I said, but they wouldn't listen to me.

Next week, you'll be looking out over Harvard Square

and maybe these gifts will help you to remember us.

Alan, here's a sweater for those cold Harvard nights.

And here's a scarf for those cold Harvard days.

I got you a mug for all those cold Harvard beer fests.

Uh, here's five of the twenty I owe you.

And, uh, here's an umbrella that somebody gave me

but I didn't like it.

Hey, I made you a Dan Quayle paperweight out of clay.

Be careful, the foot in its mouth isn't dry yet.

Alan, I couldn't think of anything clever to give you

so, I thought you might like this.

It's a picture that Dr. Samuels took of us

at the beginning of the semester.

Wow, who would have thought then that, that one of us

will be leaving so soon?

We're all gonna miss you, Alan.

- 'Yeah.' - Yeah.

Mmm-hmm.

I would say they are really liking you now.

(all) Speech, speech, speech.

[applauding]

I'm sorry, I'm getting a little misty here.

But friendships like yours mean everything to me.

Don't worry, Alan.

You'll make all new friends when you get to Harvard.

- Yeah. - Well, yeah.

Harvard..

I'll never find friends like you at Harvard.

- Aww, sure you will. - 'Yeah!'

Wow, they really like you.

No. No, this is a once in a lifetime experience.

Well, I've just realized, with all of the love

here in this room..

...I can't leave now.

Harvard can wait.

I'm gonna stay right here with all of you.

Alan, getting a few gifts is not a reason to pass up Harvard.

Yeah, it's really not, Alan.

Okay, the...real reason I'm not going to Harvard

on early admission is, uh..

...I've got a lot of maturing to do.

[coughing]

Okay.

The main reason is..

...Mr. Freelik died.

- What? - Say what?

He drowned in a fishing accident

before he could make the arrangements.

- Oh! - Oh!

I-I was afraid to tell you because I thought you'd hate me.

I should have known better.

I trash you guys and you throw me a party.

You're the greatest.

[instrumental music]

And so, I guess, in a way, I was driving the wrong way

down the road of friendship.

Thank you, Alan. Guess that wraps it up, huh?

Well, you know, I'd just like to say that, uh

when I was your age, we didn't get quite so crazy

about going to college.

I guess we all overreacted a little.

- Yeah! - Yeah, that's true.

Of course, eventually, Alan is going to go to college.

Harvard.

And you know, I could use those gifts.

[instrumental music]

[theme music]