Original subtitles

[theme music]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[instrumental music]

(male narrator on TV) And now, we see a great river city of 1960.

Here is an American city

re-planned around a highly-developed

modern traffic system.

[indistinct chatter]

We see some suggestion of the things to come.

A world with a future

in which all of us are tremendously interested

because that is where

we are going to spend the rest of our lives.

There you have it, boys and girls, ladies and gents

the 1939 World's Fair.

Wow, it's amazing

how close they were with their predictions.

Yeah, they were right about people having

phones in their cars.

They were just wrong about the long cords.

I'd like to know what you think you'll see

in the year, uh, 2038.

- No more hunger. - 'Right.'

I see a day when nobody's

the first black anything anymore.

- Mm, yeah. - Yeah.

I see mutation.

A horrible endomorphic nightmare descending upon us

cutting off all light, all life.

[groans] Oh, it's here.

'Ooh.'

Excuse me, Mr. Moore.

Dennis, I have good news for you!

Julia Child's the head chef at the cafeteria?

No.

You're a finalist in the competition

for a summer internship

at NYU's experimental physics lab!

[all cheering]

- Great! - 'Whoo!'

All you have to do is beat out

the other four kids and it's yours.

There's a test this weekend.

No problem, might as well tell the other contestants

to call it off. Wouldn't wanna see 'em waste their subway fare.

[laughing] That's my boy.

[laughs] Arvid, you help him study.

Hey, we could be study buddies.

No, thanks anyway, Arv. I don't need any help.

Oh, yeah? You are up against Wang, Wong, Chang and Epstein.

- Oh. - What?

That should accelerate your particles.

As you were.

[school bell ringing]

Okay, uh, tomorrow, it's back to the future

so, do a little research, use your imaginations.

Have some fun and bring in an educated guest, okay?

Dennis.

Listen, um..

...if you would like to be excused from this assignment

so you can concentrate

on this test thing this weekend, say so.

Ah. Thanks, Mr. Moore, but, hey, it's me, no problem.

Just like walkin' and chewing gum at the same time.

Okay. Uh, if you change your mind, let me know.

I don't want you to spread yourself to..

[instrumental music]

- Good morning, everybody. - 'Hi.'

- Morning. - Good morning.

How goes the future today?

I'll tell you tomorrow. Heh.

Arvid?

Well, hey, the future looks great.

We got, uh, genetic engineering, gene splicing

replacement of body parts.

We'll be able to fly from New York

to Tokyo in ten minutes.

Yeah, but it'll take you three hours to get to the airport.

- 'That's right.' - Bionic body parts.

You could have a whole drawer

full of spare eyes and ears and noses.

Maybe a plastic heart, like Darlene's.

- 'Uh.' - Oh.

Well, the future doesn't sound so bad.

- 'Oh.' - 'Oh, my God.'

[laughing]

Well, Mr. Blunden, uh

to what do we owe this honor?

You people have been chosen for a cosmic visit

from Omega Blunden, man of the future.

Well, we're very flattered, Omega Blunden.

Uh, is there anything you care to tell us?

Well, to begin with, there is no more war.

Anyone even attempting to begin a war

is forced to watch reruns of the "New Monkees." Ooh.

Also, scientists have determined

that long marriages are hazardous to your health

therefore, all women are required to marry a new man

every Tuesday.

Even with the law on your side, I bet you're still single.

Man of the future does not acknowledge

your primitive jokes.

And not only that, it is against the code of Nibor

to participate in any form of obesity humor.

So no-o-o.

Also, we biological units no longer require sleep.

All we need are dreams

which can be easily obtained from the dream extractor.

Watch as I demonstrate.

Ooh-hoo-hoo. Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo.

Whoa. Ooh-hoo-hoo.

Yeah, huh, nyat, nyut, nyat, nyut, whoa, whoa.

I'm zabbling, I'm zabbling! Whoa!

That was dream number 1.04.

I can't do it too often or my Ectowibbler will fall off.

[laughs]

Well, that's certainly been fascinating

visiting with you, Omega Blunden.

Uh, perhaps you could make your ancient ancestor

Dennis Blunden materialize?

No problem.

What do you guys think of my future?

- Yeah! - 'Yeah!'

[applauding]

At least you dress better.

Uh, you know, I found it long on imagination

a little short on useful information.

Dennis, you have a big test on Saturday.

How did you have time to put this costume together?

I stayed up all night workin' on this thing.

Wait a minute. You're supposed to be studying.

That's what you were doing instead of meeting me to study?

Come on, Arv, you know I can ace that test

with one lobe tied behind my brain.

Well, here, I brought you this book.

"New Vectors In Physics."

The profiles of today's hottest young physicists.

- I don't need this. - Dennis!

In there are profiles of Wang, Wong, Chang and Epstein.

- Yeah. - This could help you.

- 'Yeah.' - Mm-hmm.

Et tu, Sarah?

Look, I don't need to study. What is with you people?

I show a little creativity on one assignment

and everybody's jumping down my throat.

Well, Dennis, it's a big honor

and in a sense, you are representing the whole IHP.

- Yeah. - Yeah, Dennis.

Oh, look, why don't you people just relax

and give me a break? I'll be fine.

Mr. Moore, I gotta hand it to you.

This future stuff is fun.

What is so fun about toxic waste?

Or acid rain

or even nuclear war?

Three of my favorite rock bands.

That's another thing. Indifference.

You know, Maria does make a point.

Now, these are serious concerns, and they do cloud our future.

Mr. Moore, that's like saying there's going to be a future.

Well, don't you think you're being a little pessimistic?

Well, how can I not be?

Take the ozone layer, for instance.

Well, I thought they fixed that.

It's worse!

Look at the economy.

Economic collapse is right around the corner.

There's depression

there's famine, there's war.

- Oh, well.. - 'She's right.'

Come on, guys, lighten up.

This is the most creative assignment

we've ever been given.

It's fun, it's exciting, it's important.

I'm with you, Mr. Moore. I eat, breathe and sleep this stuff.

Well, I'm-I'm flattered, Omega, but, uh, Dennis should remember

that he does have a test on Saturday.

(as Omega) Well, no perspiration, instructor.

It's in the paper sack.

Dennis, it's not in the bag, okay?

Look, forget the funny costume and forget the funny voice

but don't forget that you have this competition

that seems to be fairly important to you.

(as Omega) Got it.

- Dennis? - Okay, okay.

[instrumental music]

So, how's tomorrow going today? Any better?

Well, we got it narrowed down to two possibilities.

Brush-fire war in the Middle East

drawin' the superpowers into a global nuclear holocaust.

Uh, le-let me tell you a little story.

Student says to his teacher, uh

"What was that you were telling us yesterday

about the sun exploding?"

Teacher says, "I said the sun could explode

in five billion years."

Student says, "Thank God!

I thought you said five million years."

Mr. Moore, Maria made us realize

that there are forces at work beyond our control.

You know, she could be right.

There will always be forces beyond our control.

I'm not saying that you can change the future

but how you approach it does make a difference.

Mr. Moore, can I say something?

I've been thinking, and I've decided

we gotta look at things with a new perspective here.

I always wanted to be a scientist 'cause I thought

that maybe, in some small way

I might be able to help my fellow man.

But the more I sit in this room and I listen to you people

people who I trust, people who I respect

'the more I realized how blind I'd been.'

Science today is just a tool

in the hands of the superpowers.

All they wanna do are build things like "Star Wars"

and lasers and beam weapons in space.

Well, what about superconductors

and chaotic physics, and the theory of everything?

Boy, Dennis, you are in a bad mood.

No, I'm not. I'm just being realistic, Janice.

I have just come to the realization

that-that those people out there are using me

using me for their evil ends.

Well, I'm not gonna have any part of it.

I'm dropping science from this point on.

I'm gonna take.. No, I mean it.

And I'm gonna take up something nice like, uh, horticulture

or needle point, or, pfft, maybe teaching the tango.

You know, weapons development isn't the only thing--

Look, hey, I have made my decision, folks.

I am off science. I'm not even taking that test.

- Oh. Dennis, come on. - You don't have to do that.

Free at last. Free at last.

[instrumental music]

Okay, we have a Dennis problem

only this time, it isn't some childish prank like, uh, well..

Like reprogramming the school's computers

so we had fire drills every half hour.

- This is different. - 'Yeah.'

Not like the time he had all the report cards

printed in Norwegian.

Yeah, I-I think I know what's going on.

Hm, even I know what's going on.

The trick is to do something about it.

But, Dr. Samuels, you know

Dennis tends to get creative with his anxieties.

A lot of kids go through things like this.

Yeah, I-I think this will be over by Sunday.

The test is Saturday.

This is definitely not your typical Dennis.

Yeah. [screams]

That is your typical Dennis.

[laughs]

[instrumental music]

Maria, you got me so depressed

I-I-I yelled at my father last night.

Why?

He handed me a baloney sandwich.

- So? - Well, don't you see?

Well, it's-it's a metaphor for everything

that's wrong in the world today!

I mean, there's-there's nitrites

nitrates, artificial coloring, preservatives!

I mean, everything that's real is gone!

And the stuff that's left will kill you!

I don't think it's right when a food has a shelf life

longer than the people who eat it!

We're being faced with a world that's a total disaster.

This is what the people who are running the world

are leaving us? How dare they?

- Yes. - You're right.

I mean, we're sitting here with our hands tied

while they just destroy the whole planet.

And what's gonna be left for us?

Well, don't worry about it, because after they drop the bomb

it'll be up to the cockroaches.

- 'Yeah.' - 'Great.'

First, one of 'em has to get the nomination.

A little political humor.

That's easy for you to joke about. You're old.

Yeah, Mr. Moore, you've led a full life.

We're being nipped in our buds.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

[school bell rings]

More future shock, huh?

They're right, Mr. Moore, our lives are meaningless.

And it's all your fault.

- 'Yeah.' - 'Mm-hmm.'

Mine?

- Your generation. - Mm-hmm.

- You've ruined the world. - 'Mm-hmm.'

Pretty soon, you'll be bailing out, and we're stuck with it.

Okay, personally

I'm not planning on bailing out in the near future.

I, I have a few books I wanna read, uh

some plays that I'm gonna direct

and I do have assignments to grade.

Well, if you're talking about this assignment

you'll have one less to grade.

Mr. Moore, I agree with Darlene, with all due respect.

- Yeah, yeah. - We do not want to do it.

That's right! I don't see any point in..

Uh, though, if you really have your heart set on it, Mr. Moore

I don't see any reason..

No, no, I'd rather talk about soap.

- What? - Soap?

Yeah, I wonder if anybody in this class can tell me

how this cheap

not-very-good-smelling bar of carbolic soap

changed the course of history?

Mr. Moore, aren't you gonna say anything

about the future assignment?

No. I'm supposed to be teaching history, the past.

So, uh, let's go back to the 1850s, okay?

What was life like then?

It was short, so were most people.

Because of poor medicine and malnutrition.

The 12-hour work day was common.

Day care meant your kids worked at the factory with you.

- Mm-hmm. - Yeah.

Okay, okay, we get it, so what you're saying, Mr. Moore

is that life stinks, and it always has, so get used to it.

And that's what the future is all about.

No, this is what the future was all about.

- What? - Let's jump ahead to the 1950s.

Okay?

- Average lifespan? - Seventy years.

Mm-hmm. Typhoid, measles, polio--

- Gone. Vaccines were developed. - Mm-hmm.

What about that 12-hour workday?

Down to eight hours, and no more child labor.

- 'Mm-hmm.' - 'Right.'

And we had museums

we had a lot of libraries

and television.

In the 1950s, you could turn on your TV set

and see practically anything.

- Except the black person. - 'Mm-hmm.'

Well, there's room for improvement.

But usually, if a lot of people work to solve a problem

it gets better, huh?

Forget it, Mr. Moore. Things are different now.

We've got problems in the world now that are unsolvable.

[chuckles] You know, people have been saying that

all through history

and yet, these problems keep getting solved.

Where have you been?

[Dennis sighs]

Just been walking through the park

visiting my old pals, the trees

saying goodbye to good old Mother Earth.

Saying hello to a couple of hot-dog stands?

[laughing]

You know, Dennis

I believe that your friends, the trees

may stick around a little longer.

Why don't you listen to this discussion

see if you agree, okay?

Somebody tell me how this bar of soap changed history.

Puccini wrote the first soap opera?

See, in the 1800s

hospitals were terrifying places.

People checked in. They didn't always check out.

That's true.

I mean, you went in with one thing

while you were there, you contracted everything else.

Now, it's very depressing

but that's the way things were.

And everyone accepted it

save one person, Joseph Lister.

Now, he believed that infection was being passed

patient to patient by doctors.

So he said, "Hey, guys

in between operations, use this."

They did.

A new concept was born.

Coming home from the hospital!

[laughing]

So one day, maybe somebody here will say

"Hey, guys, do this."

And the ozone layer will be preserved

or it will cause peace to break out.

Each one of you has that kind of potential within you.

Don't give it up so easily.

Okay.

Maybe you're right, maybe at least trying to do something

is better than talking about how awful it is.

- 'Mm-hmm.' - Right.

Mm. Alright.

So are we doing the assignment?

- Yes. - Yes, sir.

Yeah, right.

- Dennis? - What?

Dennis, let's just say

maybe there will be a future, okay?

And quite possibly, physical sciences

will play a positive role in it.

And we both know that a mind is a terrible thing to waste.

So what do you say?

- About what? - You know what.

I-I say you're absolutely right.

I-I've been a fool walkin' around, talking to trees.

There is a job to do

and I'm gonna be workin' on this future project

'twenty-four hours a day.'

- I won't let you down, Mr. Mo-- - Dennis.

You know what we could start off with?

We could start off by doing..

Perhaps, with a talk with me and Mr. Moore in the hallway.

(Moore) I think so.

Now, you don't expect me to believe

that you've been wandering around depressed

over the fate of the universe, do you?

- No, but I'm depressed. - Mm-hmm.

- The competition? - I guess so.

Why?

Four reasons.

Wang, Wong, Chang and Epstein?

They're good.

Darn good. Darn, darn good.

Mr. Moore, they're killers. I don't have a chance.

Well, not if you're not there.

Do you know anything about physics at all?

Well, I'm, uh, familiar with Archimedes' second principle.

The body is totally immersed in water

the phone is bound to ring.

Ever read "New Vectors In Physics?"

No.

I'm competing against

the best guys in the city.

I can get my legs broken. I mean, what if I'm humiliated?

I could come in last place.

Dennis, last place amongst the five best minds

in New York City is not too shabby.

See, right now, you're a big fish in a small pond.

Uh, y-you're comfortable.

And I don't think that you're gonna know how good you are

till you get in a pond with some other...fair-sized fish.

I know my limits.

No, you don't.

And I don't think you will until you risk something.

[locker door shuts]

Ah, I appreciate what you're saying, Mr. Moore

but if it's all the same to you, I'd just like to stick

with this future project.

[scoffs] Dennis, that's a choice

that you get to live with. It's your future.

[instrumental music]

Good evening, Darlene Merriman

for "The Twenty First Century News" service.

This is Friday, March 10th, 2038.

"The scientific team of Blunden, Engen, Lazarotto

"announced their discovery that the hair spray layer

"which replaced the ozone layer

is just as effective in keeping out the gamma rays."

And also eliminates the frizzies.

[applause]

[indistinct]

[instrumental music]

"Sarah Nevins, US ambassador to Ethiopia

"today announced that surplus grain would be shipped to Iowa

"to help with the shortfall in that state's harvest.

"This is the 10th year in a row

"that Ethiopia has had a surplus crop

"thanks to the Engen system of planting

"based on mathematical equations

too complex to be discussed in this limited time."

[instrumental music]

"Athletes from all nations began arriving in South Africa today

"in preparation for the opening ceremonies

"of the Summer Olympics

"at Nelson Mandela Memorial Stadium.

"The combined Israeli-Palestinian team

"looks impressive in track and field

"with a strong challenge from the all-Irish team.

"In basketball today

"Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, aged 91

announced that this would be his last season in the NBA."

[instrumental music]

"ABC Television today announced a new episode of "Moonlighting"

"is in the works for next year.

"This brings to 12

the number of episodes in the last decade."

[chuckles]

[applause]

Very impressive. Ah.

What about the, uh, wrap-up anchor Dennis Blunden?

Um, well, actually, Mr. Moore, I haven't done the assignment.

(all) 'What?'

But I could wing something

if you guys don't mind.

- Sure. - Hey, great, Dennis.

[sighs] Let's see. The year 2038.

The world is a better place today

because a bunch of high-school kids grew up

and helped make it that way.

As it turns out, they all had the same teacher

a fellow by the name of Moore or something.

He told them about soap.

'And in fact, one of those kids'

grew up to be pretty important in the science world

a fellow by the name of Blunden or something or other.

- Alright. - Wonderful.

So, if you don't mind, Mr. Moore

I'd like to be excused so I can get back to the library

where I have been studying like a mad man

to pass the test for this physics internship.

I, uh, realized it's something I wanted

and I never would have forgiven myself

for not taking the chance to get it.

It's also a good excuse to get outta class.

[laughing]

Mr. Moore?

Get outta here, you big lug.

I didn't mean it that way..

[laughter]

[indistinct chatter]

[instrumental music]

- Morning. - Morning.

- So? - So?

- How did it go? - How'd what go?

I'll kill you, so help me.

[chuckles]

We don't get the results till next week.

- But I think I did alright. - Ah.

Wang, Wong and Chang all they cracked up to be?

They were okay. Ooh.

But, Epstein, pfft, fantastic.

Yeah, maybe you'll come in second.

Uh, maybe better than that.

It's, uh, Margery Epstein.

I got a date with her Friday night.

- Really? - Yeah.

[chuckles]

Can I, uh, give you a piece of advice?

Well, why stop now?

Don't wear the Omega man suit.

Really?

[theme music]

[music continues]