Original subtitles

TANYA KIM:HEY, I'M TANYA KIMFROM ETALK DAILY.

I'M HERE WITH KEVIN SMITH

AND HIS COSTAR JASON MEWES...

TELL MEWHAT A GREAT GUY I AM,

'CAUSE I HAVETWO TICKETS

TO THE PARTY OF THE YEAR.

CHECK IT OUT.

WHO DID YOUSTEAL THOSE FROM?

I WAS INVITED.

I WORKED ON THE MOVIE,REMEMBER?

AND I WAS GOING TO ASK YOUTO BE MY PLUS ONE.

TOO BAD GOING WITH YOUIS A MINUS 20.

LEXI...

'KAY,LET'S RAISE HELL TOGETHER

LIKE WE USED TO,HUH?

I'M GOING WITHPAIGE MICHELCHUCK.

YOU'RE KIDDING ME.

THE QUEEN OF DEGRASSIIS TAKING THE QUEENOF THE TRAILER PARK

TO THE PREMIERE?

I PREFER TO BE KNOWN AS"QUEEN OF DON'T NEED JAY,

AND NEVER DID".

TANYA KIM:HEY, ARE YOU GUYS HAPPYTO BE BACK IN CANADA?

KEVIN SMITH: I AM INSANELY HAPPY TO BE BACK IN CANADA.

CANADA - THE MOTHER LAND;

TORONTO -CRADLE OF CIVILIZATION.

TORONTO IS WHERE THEY HAVETHAT POUTINE CRAP

THAT LUNCHBOXLOVES SO MUCH.

REALLY SIR,IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY.

JASON MEWES: YO, YO LISTEN...

HE CHOSE A TORONTO PREMIERE OVER L.A. PREMIERE

BASED ON FOOD.

? Whatever it takes

? I know I can make it through

? If I hold out

? I know I can make it through

? Be the best

? Be the best I can

? And I say to you

? Whatever it takes

? I know I can make it

? I know I can make it

? I know I can make it through

TANYA KIM:[GIGGLING]

TORONTO IS WHEREWE CAST THE FLICK;

TORONTO IS WHEREWE SHOT THE FLICK.

KEVIN SMITH IS BEINGINTERVIEWED RIGHT THERE.

WHAT DO YOU THINKHE'S SAYING?

THAT TONIGHT WILL BETHE GREATEST,

MOST MAGICALMOVIE PREMIERE EVER?

IT BETTER BE!

IT'S NOT EVERY NIGHTWE GET TO HAVE

OUR PROFESSIONALACTING DEBUT.

YEAH,OR HAVE MY MUSIC FEATURED

IN BIG,HOLLYWOOD MOVIE.

WHICH IS WHY WE'RE ALLGOING FIRST CLASS TONIGHT.

I'M TALKING STRETCH LIMOS...

YOU GUYS GOT A LIMO?

DIBS ON STICKING MY HEADOUT THE SUN ROOF.

I AM COMING,RIGHT PAIGE?

I'M SORRY, HON,

THEY ONLY GAVE METWO TICKETS...

AND I'M TAKING HAZEL.

PLEASE, AS IF WE WEREGOING TO BRING HER.

OUR LIMO'SA SKANK-FREE ZONE.

DID YOU JUST SKANKIFYMY FRIEND?

FRIEND?

MORE LIKE PET PROJECT.

JEALOUS MUCH?

NO.

I JUST DON'T GET WHYYOU HANG OUT WITH HER.

FUNNY, I WAS JUST ASKING MYSELFTHE SAME THING ABOUT YOU.

ENJOY THE LIMO.

I'LL SEE YOU GUYSAT THE MOVIE.

ALEX!

WAIT!

"YOU WANNA GO TO THE PREMIERE?"YOU SAID THAT.

THAT'S AN INVITATION.

IT WAS REALLY MOREOF AN OBSERVATION.

LIKE, "YOU WANNA GOTO THE PREMIERE?"

I THOUGHT YOU WERE SERIOUS.

WHATEVER.I'M OUTTA HERE.

I'M NOT STANDINGFOR YOUR WHOLE

I'M ALEX,

I'M-GONNA-IGNORE-EVERYONE-FOR-A-WEEK ACT.

SO I WANTED TO GO TO A PREMIEREONCE IN MY LIFE.

CRUCIFY ME.

PETER:GRAB A BOOK OR SOMETHING.

PEOPLE SEE US,

THEY'LL DEFINITELYSTART TO WONDER.

PETER:WHO CARES?

I HAVE TICKETS TO THE PARTYOF THE YEAR.

THANK YOU, MOM.

[SIGHS]

I'M WARNING YOU.

MAJOR DEVASTATIONIF YOU LET ME DOWN.

WHAT IF I LET YOUDOWN EASY?

I ALREADY HAVE A DATE...

WITH MY STEP-DAD.

MOM HAS TO STAY HOMEWITH MY LITTLE BROTHER.

THING IS,MANNY'S IN THE MOVIE.

SHE'S GONNA BE THERESO...

YEAH. NO TALKING,NO TOUCHING,

NO LOOKINGAT EACH OTHER.

I KNOW THE DRILL.

JUST BEING UNDER THE SAME ROOFAS YOU TONIGHT

IS GONNA BEENOUGH FOR ME.

[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]

[SIGHS]

KEVIN. JASON.

I'D LIKE YOU BOTHTO MEET

ONE OF DEGRASSI'SFINEST TEACHERS,

ARCHIE SIMPSON.

KEVIN:RIGHT ON, SIR.

WOW. WOW.

I'M SUCH A BIG FAN.

"JAY AND SILENT BOBSTRIKE BACK"

IS ONE OFMY FAVOURITE MOVIES.

KEVIN: THANKS MAN.

MR. SMITH?

KEVIN?

KEV.

AS I LIVE AND BREATHE,PAIGE MICHALTON!

HOW ARE YOU?

UH...MICHALCHUK.

MICHALCHUK. YOU KNOW WHAT?MY BAD.

WE JUST ALWAYS CALLED YOUTHE BUSTED LEG GIRL SO...

NOT ANYMORE.

THESE WILL BE THE LEASTBROKENEST GAMS

ON YOUR RED CARPET!

I'M SORRY,DID YOU JUST SAY GAMS?

WHAT 21ST CENTURY TEENAGER

STILL USES THE TERM GAMS?

THE KIND WHO NEEDSONE MORE TICKET

TO THE PREMIERE TONIGHT.

COULD YOU SPARE A TEENSY WEENSYEXTRA GOLDEN TICKET, MR. SMITH?

PLEASE?FOR MY FRIEND?

GOD, YOU'RE WORKING ME HARD,AREN'T YOU?

JUST LIKE A WOMAN.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

I HAPPEN TO HAVEONE OF THOSE

TEENSY WEENSY TICKETSRIGHT HERE

AND IT COULD BE YOURS IF...

YOU SAY "ABOUT".

MR. SMITH...

COME ON,YOU KNOW I LOVE IT.LET ME HEAR IT.

ABOOT.

MMM. I MELT.

THAT'S JUST SO CUTE.

YOU EARNED THIS.

JUST DON'T LET ME SEE ITUP ON EBAY,

OR ELSE I'M GOING TO CUTYOU OUT OF THE SEQUEL, TOO.

I CAN'T THANK...

UM "TOO"?

YEAH.

PAIGE, UH...

WE HAD TO TRIM YOUR PART DOWNA LITTLE BIT.

SO...

AND WHEN I SAYA LITTLE BIT I MEAN...

COMPLETELY.

WAS I THAT BAD?!

AND UNAWAREOF MY BADNESS?

NO, NO, HON.YOU WERE GREAT.

BUT IT'S JUST IN THE COURSEOF CUTTING A MOVIE

STUFF, YOU KNOW,HITS THE EDITING ROOM FLOOR.

WHEN I WAS DOING"JERSEY GIRL",

I CUT J-LO OUT OF HALFTHE MOVE.

AFFLECK, I WANTEDTO CUT HIM OUT ENTIRELY

BUT THEN THAT JUST WOULD'VELEFT THAT LITTLE KID,

I DIDN'T SEE"JERSEY GIRL".

REALLY.

WELL NOW I'M REALLY GLADI CUT YOU OUT OF MY MOVIE.

I'M JUST KIDDING.YOU KNOW WHAT?

PLEASE TELL ME YOU'RE STILL GONNA COME TO THE PREMIERE.

YEAH.

GOOD.

EVERYONE'S GONNA BE THERE.WHO DO YOU THINK'SGONNA BE THERE?

CRAIG: YOU THINK SO?

DO YOU THINK ALANIS IS GOING TO BE THERE?

HERE.

AND BRING A GUEST.

KEVIN CUT ME OUTOF THE MOVIE.

HENCE, I'M NOT GOING.

SO WHAT, YOU'RE JUSTGONNA SIT AT HOME?

I WAS THINKING OF LYING,ACTUALLY...

IN BED,WITH ICE CREAM.

UH-UH.

YOU'RE GOING.

THIS ISN'T DEBATABLE.

PAIGE, IT'S NOT LIKE ACTRESSIS PART OF YOUR TEN-YEAR-PLAN.

NEITHER IS HUMILIATION.

ME AND YOU ARE HITTINGTHAT RED CARPET TONIGHT,

AND WE'RE GONNA MAKE KEVIN

SO REGRET CUTTING YOUOUT OF THAT FILM

'CAUSE WE ARE GOINGTO LOOK HOT.

AND I DON'T MEAN UP-DO,PEARLS, PINK PROM DRESS HOT.

I MEAN "HOT" HOT.

[ROCK MUSIC BEGINS]

AND YOU CUT HEROUT OF THE MOVIE.

JACKASS.

SIMPSON:HEY, JUST IN CASEYOU DIDN'T KNOW,

YOU LOOK BEAUTIFULTONIGHT, EM.

FEMALE ANNOUNCER: THIS ACTRESS WAS 19

WHEN SHE GOT HER FIRST NOMINATION

FOR BEST ACTRESS IN A FEATURE FILM.

WHO WAS SHE?

SO THIS IS THE PART

WHEN EVERYONE GETS TO SEE MECUT FROM THE MOVIE.

THIS IS THE PART WHEREYOU SIT BACK AND ENJOY

BEING HERE WITH ME.

[MOVIE MUSIC BEGINS]

YOU BOYS ARETOO BLOODY STUPID

TO MAKE THE GRADE DOWNIN THE STATES

AND YOUR LAST HOPEIS THE SCHOOL SYSTEM

OF THE GREAT WHITE NORTH,EH?

YOU WANT TO GET OOTOF GRADE 12?

YOU BETTER STARTLEARNING

WHAT THE METRIC SYSTEM'SALL ABOOT!

AUDIENCE:[CHUCKLING]

JASON: I'VE GOT THREE WORDS FOR YOU:

GOT TO...

SIR!

THERE WILL BE NO MORECUSS WORDS OUT OT YOU

YOU POTTY-MOUTHED,MALLRAT.

YOU'RE GONNA LEARN THE DUAL LANGUAGES

OF MY HOME A NATIVE LAND,

AND YOU'RE GONNA SAVOURMY POUTINE!

'CAUSE YOU'RE IN CANADA NOW,EH?

[CHUCKLING]

JAY, WHEN I WAS BORN,

STAR WARS HAD ALREADY BEEN OUT ON VIDEO FOR TEN WHOLE YEARS.

YOU'RE TOO OLD.

EVEN THOUGH THERE'S LAWSTO PREVENT IT,

I'M GOING TO MARRY APPOLONIA.

SHE'S THE SUGARIN MY MAPLE;

CHEESE IN MY POUTINE;

THE BACK IN MY BACON.

THE "ICK"IN PATHETIC.

[APPLAUSE]

ALEX:WHO KNEW MANNY COULDACTUALLY ACT?

AND CRAIG'S SONG?FULL-ON ROCKED.

PAIGE:YOU'RE SOUNDINGSUSPICIOUSLY UPBEAT.

ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE OKAY?

ALEX:IT'S A HOLLYWOOD PREMIERE!

SUE ME FOR GETTINGCAUGHT UP IN IT.

WELL, THE ONLY THINGI'M CATCHING

IS A CAB RIDE HOME

FOR MY HOT DATEWITH BEN AND JERRY.

ALEX:WHAT KIND OF FRIENDWOULD I BE

IF I LET YOU BAILON THE HOTTEST PARTY EVER?

THIS IS THE AFTER PARTY?

THIS ISTHE KIDDIE VERSION.

THE REAL PARTYIS THROUGH THOSE DOORS.

AND IT'S INVITATION-ONLY, STRICTLY VIP.

ALEX:AND SO ABOUT TO BE CRASHED.

YOU REALLY THINKHE'S GONNA LET YOU IN?

TOBY:I'M A CLOSE,PERSONAL FRIEND OF KEVIN,

AND IF HE FINDS OUTTHAT YOU DIDN'T LET US IN?

YOU'RE GOING TO BEIN BIG TROUBLE, PAL. HUGE!

UH...I CAN MOVE MYSELF.

THANKS.

HEY. YOU WERE GREATIN THE MOVIE.

YEAH.ALL FIVE LINES.

WELL, THEY WEREA GREAT FIVE LINES.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

IT'S VODKA.I'LL ONLY POUR HALF.

DON'T.

IF YOU GET CAUGHT,YOU'LL BE STUCKIN DETENTION FOR WEEKS

AND THEN I'LL NEVERGET TO SEE YOU.

WELL, YOU CANSEE ME TONIGHT.

MAYBE SOME PLACE QUIETAND SECLUDED?

THEATRE LOBBY.30 MINUTES.

MANNY!

HEY...

EMMA: YOU WERE AMAZING!

REALLY?YOU THINK SO?

DID YOU STAY UNTIL THE ENDTO HEAR CRAIG'S SONG?

EMMA: OF COURSE!

LET'S TOAST TO DEGRASSI'SCELEBRITY COUPLE!

I DID MAKEUP ON THE MOVIE.DO YOU MIND IF I CUT THROUGH?

NICE TRY, GIRLIE.

SORRY I'M LATE.

SOME JERK BLOCKED ME INAT THE STRIP CLUB, AGAIN.

THE SIGN CLEARLY SAYS "EMPLOYEE PARKING ONLY".

OH, SWEETIE,

I HOPE YOU DIDN'TTIRE YOURSELF OUT AT WORK.

YOU PROMISED MESOME HOT DANCING.

ALL RIGHT,IN YOU GO.

MARCO:WHAT?!

PAIGE:I CAN'T BELIEVE THE BOUNCERACTUALLY FELL FOR THAT!

ARE YOU KIDDING?

WE'RE A COUPLEOF HOT CHICKS.

OF COURSE HE WAS GONNAFALL FOR THAT.

JAY: LADIES.

EW, VIP DOES NOT STANDFOR VASTLY ICKY POSER.

WHAT'RE YOU DOING HERE?

THAT'S MY BOY MICKEYRIGHT THERE. HEY.

HE WORKED SECURITYON THE MOVIE.

WELL, I SAW YOUR LITTLEGIRL-ON-GIRL PDA.

IS THAT WHY YOU DUMPED ME?

ALEX: RIGHT.

HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUHOOKING UP WITH EVERY SKANKIN THE RAVINE.

AH... AND YOU'RE TRYINGTO GET BACK AT ME

BY HOOKING UPWITH EVERY SKANK HERE.

YOU DO NOT CALL HER THAT,EVER.

PAIGE, WOULD YOU LIKETO DANCE WITH ME?

LOVE TO.

REMIND ME TO TELL YOU

HOW MUCH I LIKEYOUR NAUGHTY SIDE.

CONSIDER YOURSELFREMINDED.

[VACUUM STARTS]

LET'S GO.

[SOUND OF SOMEONE KISSING]

THERE'S SOMEBODYIN HERE WITH US.

THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE!

THEY'RE UPSTAGING USAT OUR OWN PREMIERE,

THESE CHICKS.

WHY AREN'T YOU AND IOUT THERE,

DOING SOME KINDA EROTICALLYCHARGED DANCE ROUTINE?

WE CAN, MAN.LET'S DO IT!

IT WAS A RHETORICALQUESTION.

DUDE, DON'T CALL 'EMRHETORICAL,

THAT'S MEAN.

YOU'RE RHETORICAL.

I NEED TO GO IN THEREAND FACE THEM.

PETER:DON'T.

HE'S MARRIEDTO MY MOTHER

AND HE'S IN THE THEATRENECKING WITH YOURS.

RUNNING IN THEREWON'T FIX ANYTHING.

HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?

I JUST DO, OKAY?

YOU DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHINGTILL YOU'VE CALMED DOWN.

YOU'LL REGRET IT.

BELIEVE ME.

I HAVE TO GO.

EVER FEEL DRUNKWITHOUT DRINKING?

IS THAT WHY YOURSHOES WENT AWOL?

THEY WERE PINCHY.

I'M GONNA GETSOME WATER.

I'LL GO GET YOU SOME.

HI!

SO, THIS NEW LESBIAN THINGYOU GOT GOING ON...

I LIKE TO WATCH.

I LIKE TO PUNCH.DREAM ON.

LEXI...LEXI, COME ON.

WHY WEREN'T YOUTHIS ADVENTUROUS

WHILE WE WERE DATING,HUH?

WE COULD'VE HAD FUN.

YOU'RE DISGUSTING.

OH, AND YOU?

PUTTING ON A SHOWFOR EVERYONE?

[CHUCKLES]

YOU KNOW,WHAT MAKES YOU THINK

TONIGHT IS ABOUT YOU,ANYWAYS?

IT'S NOT.IT'S ABOUT HER.

HERE.

THANK YOU.

LET ME WALKYOU HOME.

BUT MY SHOES!

BAREFOOT SUITS YOU.

AND BESIDES,MY PLACE IS ON THE WAY.

MY MOM AND HER BOYFRIENDARE HOME

SO JUST WAITBY THE DOOR.

OH, BUT I'M THIRSTY.

CAN'T I JUST GETA DRINK OF WATER?

NO.I'M GRABBING SHOES

AND THEN WE'RE OUTTA HERE,IMMEDIATELY.

EMILY:LEXI?

HEY.

WHO'S YOUR FRIEND?

ALEX:NEVERMIND, MOM.JUST GRABBING SHOES.

HI, MS. NUNEZ.I'M PAIGE.

PAIGE...

THE PAIGE?

I FEEL LIKE I'M INTHE PRESENCE OF ROYALTY.

YOU KNOW THAT LEXI

NEVER STOPS TALKING ABOUT YOU!

PAIGE: REALLY? LITTLE OL' ME?

MOM, WHERE'S CHAD?

OH, HE PASSED OUTHOURS AGO.

COME SIT.

CAN I GET YOU SOMETHING,DARLING?

PAIGE:YEAH. DIET ANYTHING, PLEASE.

ALEX:PAIGE, WE HAVE TO GO.

WOULD YOU HOLDYOUR HORSES, LEXI,

AND JUST LET THE GIRLSIT AWHILE!

BE A GOOD HOSTESSAND GET HER A DRINK, EH.

LOOKS LIKE THE PARTY'S JUSTGETTING STARTED, MS. NUNEZ.

PLEASE,CALL ME EMILY.

EMILY.OKAY.

SO WHAT WAS LEXI LIKEAS A GIRL?

YOU KNOW WHAT?I CAN'T REMEMBER.

[LAUGHING]

I'M KIDDING.

LEX, I'M KIDDING.

I'M JUST KIDDING,HON.

EMMA,WHAT'S GOING ON?

I'M MAKING TEAAGAIN.

AND CRYING AGAIN.

I LEFT SOMETHINGIN THE THEATRE,

SO I WENT BACK INTO GET IT

AND THAT'S WHEN I SAWYOU AND HER.

MS. HATZILAKOS.

WHAT?

WE-WE WERE JUST TALKING.

SNAKE,I SAW YOU KISS HER.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

IT JUST SORT OF HAPPENED,YOU KNOW.

IT WAS SUCH A MISTAKE.

SO YOU STICK YOUR TONGUEDOWN THE PRINCIPAL'S THROAT

BY ACCIDENT?

EMMA, QUIET PLEASE.

YOU GONNA WAKE YOUR MOM.

BUT WHY?

DID YOU THINKIT WOULD BE FUN?

DID YOU GET TO THE PARTY

AND WANT TO ACT LIKE A TEENAGER AGAIN?

JUST GIVE ME A REASON, DAD.PLEASE.

HAVE YOU EVER DONE SOMETHINGYOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO

WITH SOMEONE YOU WEREN'TSUPPOSED TO BE WITH?

EMMA, I'M SO ASHAMED.

I WON'T BLAME YOU

IF YOU NEVER WANTTO SPEAK TO ME AGAIN.

IT'S NOT ABOUT ME.

IT'S ABOUT MOM,

AND WHETHER I'M GONNATELL HER WHAT I SAW.

YOUR MOM GO TO BED?

ALEX: YEAH.

SHE SAID TO SAY GOODNIGHT.

SHE'S NICE.

LIKE MOTHER,LIKE DAUGHTER.

TONIGHT WAS GOOD.

YOU'RE MY LUCKY CHARM.

TONIGHT WAS GOOD.

PAIGE?

ABOUT BEFORE...

WHEN WE WERE DANCING?

WHAT ABOUT IT?

WE WERE JUST HAVING FUN.

NO BIG DEAL,RIGHT?

EMILY: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU SPENT IT ALL?!

CHAD: I MEAN I SPENT IT ALL!

EMILY: WHAT? HOW COULD YOU BE SO STUPID, CHAD?!

I'M WALKING YOUHOME NOW. GO!

CHAD: DON'T EVER CALL ME STUPID!

EMILY:WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

THAT'S IT,I'M OUT OF HERE!

CHAD, NO!WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!

ALEX:WILL YOU STOP IT?!

WILL YOU HOLD STILL?I'M TRYING TO HELP.

BEING HEREIN YOUR ROOM,

THIS HELPS.

IT'S QUIET.

NO SCREAMING,NO SMASHING.

NOBODY SHOULD HAVE TO DEALWITH DRAMA

OF THE SHOVED-OVER-THE-END TABLE VARIETY,

DAY IN, DAY OUT.

EVEN ME?

ESPECIALLY YOU.

PAIGE,I'M IN TROUBLE.

THIS ISN'T RELATED TO ANY TABLE COLLISIONS

THAT HAPPENED TONIGHT.

IT'S A DIFFERENTKIND OF TROUBLE.

UM...

OKAY, UH...

SPEAKING OF TROUBLE UH...

OR NOT TROUBLE UM...

UH YOU...YOU SHOULD TAKE MY BED,

AND I'M GONNA-I'M GONNA SLEEP DOWNSTAIRS

ON THE COUCH.

PAIGE?

NIGHTY-NIGHT THEN!

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0