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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,990 --> 00:00:09,379 Evan was doing so well it was like a 2 00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:14,149 miracle we couldn't believe it 3 00:00:09,380 --> 00:00:16,339 you just couldn't believe it is this the 4 00:00:14,150 --> 00:00:18,618 same kid I mean here he is he's growing 5 00:00:16,339 --> 00:00:21,099 and he's popularity as his lovely 6 00:00:18,618 --> 00:00:23,660 friends they have a wonderful time 7 00:00:21,099 --> 00:00:25,489 suddenly there's hair there and his jaw 8 00:00:23,660 --> 00:00:29,210 gets firmer and he's taller than I am 9 00:00:25,489 --> 00:00:31,339 and he's a man he's a young man very 10 00:00:29,210 --> 00:00:33,230 handsome very popular with the girls but 11 00:00:31,339 --> 00:00:35,929 not really all that interested in them 12 00:00:33,229 --> 00:00:39,049 his voice went from like this to this we 13 00:00:35,929 --> 00:00:41,509 talked to him head-on do you have 14 00:00:39,049 --> 00:00:43,449 thoughts of suicide do you want to kill 15 00:00:41,509 --> 00:00:48,250 yourself you want to harm yourself and 16 00:00:43,450 --> 00:00:50,960 said no you know I don't kids to know 17 00:00:48,250 --> 00:00:52,880 that if they say certain things or if 18 00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:55,219 they do certain things they're gonna be 19 00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:57,230 stopped you know especially if they have 20 00:00:55,219 --> 00:00:59,929 parents who are attentive to what's 21 00:00:57,229 --> 00:01:02,449 going on with them so if a kid really 22 00:00:59,929 --> 00:01:03,380 doesn't want to be stopped he's not 23 00:01:02,450 --> 00:01:06,500 gonna say anything 24 00:01:03,380 --> 00:01:09,200 I remember the officers asking me 25 00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:10,578 whether there was a suicide note and we 26 00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:12,259 looked around his room and there was 27 00:01:10,578 --> 00:01:15,498 nothing and then he pointed to a 28 00:01:12,259 --> 00:01:21,039 computer to be honest the gist of the 29 00:01:15,498 --> 00:01:23,298 letter was what every fucking 30 00:01:21,039 --> 00:01:28,748 fifteen-year-old thinks about themself 31 00:01:23,299 --> 00:01:33,310 that I'm not good enough no one likes me 32 00:01:28,748 --> 00:01:37,459 things won't get better the differences 33 00:01:33,310 --> 00:01:40,879 evan felt that 20,000 times stronger 34 00:01:37,459 --> 00:01:44,289 than any normal fifteen-year-old there 35 00:01:40,879 --> 00:01:47,358 isn't a choice to cope there isn't I 36 00:01:44,289 --> 00:01:50,810 have a family the people I love and 37 00:01:47,358 --> 00:01:52,728 people who love me and you really have 38 00:01:50,810 --> 00:01:57,649 no choice but to get up and put one foot 39 00:01:52,728 --> 00:01:58,819 in front of the other and basically I 40 00:01:57,649 --> 00:02:02,420 think the thing that I think about most 41 00:01:58,819 --> 00:02:02,959 is uh I just can't believe it I can't 42 00:02:02,420 --> 00:02:04,728 believe this 43 00:02:02,959 --> 00:02:08,528 I can't believe it I can't believe I'm 44 00:02:04,728 --> 00:02:08,528 sitting here I can't believe 45 00:02:09,159 --> 00:02:20,300 that um that I gave birth to this boy 46 00:02:14,689 --> 00:02:21,979 and raised buried him I can't believe it 47 00:02:20,300 --> 00:02:23,510 it's just a sense of disbelief I don't 48 00:02:21,979 --> 00:02:25,699 know if I'll ever really understand that 49 00:02:23,509 --> 00:02:27,139 it's true that this really happened I 50 00:02:25,699 --> 00:02:29,780 can't believe it really happened I mean 51 00:02:27,139 --> 00:02:32,119 tell me it's a dream I can't believe it 52 00:02:29,780 --> 00:02:34,520 I can't and I can't believe that the 53 00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:38,420 day's continued to go by and that the 54 00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:40,750 world could choose to world date without 55 00:02:38,419 --> 00:02:40,750 them 3870

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