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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,523 --> 00:00:08,228 ♪ I'm sticking with you honey ♪ 2 00:00:08,296 --> 00:00:11,057 ♪ You make the whole world sunny ♪ 3 00:00:11,089 --> 00:00:12,900 Oh, my God, Maggie. What is she doing? 4 00:00:12,977 --> 00:00:14,529 Where did you find this? 5 00:00:14,569 --> 00:00:17,125 Her roommate's mother sent it to me, because she's worried. 6 00:00:17,165 --> 00:00:19,314 Oh, it's mesmerizing. 7 00:00:19,414 --> 00:00:20,873 What is it? Is it porn? 8 00:00:20,913 --> 00:00:23,570 It's called breadfacing, and yes, 9 00:00:23,610 --> 00:00:26,181 people are definitely jerking off to it. 10 00:00:26,243 --> 00:00:27,622 This is a cry for help. 11 00:00:27,662 --> 00:00:30,056 Actually, it's hard to cry with bread in your mouth. 12 00:00:30,128 --> 00:00:32,292 ♪ All over this town ♪ 13 00:00:37,576 --> 00:00:38,776 I'll throw it out. 14 00:00:38,816 --> 00:00:40,669 ♪ What's your problem? ♪ 15 00:00:40,709 --> 00:00:43,025 ♪ What's your problem? ♪ 16 00:00:43,080 --> 00:00:46,948 ♪ Well if you don't like girls that are stronger than you ♪ 17 00:00:46,988 --> 00:00:48,307 Oh, my God. 18 00:00:48,347 --> 00:00:50,151 Lauren, what the hell? 19 00:00:50,191 --> 00:00:51,619 Relax. It's for an event tonight. 20 00:00:51,659 --> 00:00:53,317 ♪ Well if you don't like ♪ 21 00:00:54,926 --> 00:00:56,188 Here's your dry-cleaning. 22 00:00:56,247 --> 00:00:58,004 I mean, it's not really dry-cleaned. 23 00:00:58,044 --> 00:00:59,879 I just ironed it really hard and put it in this bag, 24 00:00:59,919 --> 00:01:02,016 but... whatever. 25 00:01:03,167 --> 00:01:04,270 Thank you. 26 00:01:05,921 --> 00:01:08,274 - Who is that? - Oh, that's my new intern. 27 00:01:08,327 --> 00:01:09,421 You have an intern? 28 00:01:09,461 --> 00:01:10,873 It's basically slave labor, 29 00:01:10,913 --> 00:01:13,019 TBQH, but, you know, they're getting a credit for school, 30 00:01:13,059 --> 00:01:14,711 so my conscience is clear. 31 00:01:15,507 --> 00:01:17,420 Come on. Seriously? 32 00:01:17,460 --> 00:01:18,662 I know. I know. I am so sorry. 33 00:01:18,702 --> 00:01:20,797 I just... I have a major deal tonight. 34 00:01:20,857 --> 00:01:21,858 Makeup? 35 00:01:21,926 --> 00:01:24,623 Yeah, it's makeup you can eat, but I wouldn't. 36 00:01:24,663 --> 00:01:27,138 Can I get anyone some coffee? 37 00:01:27,178 --> 00:01:28,936 No, uh... 38 00:01:29,046 --> 00:01:30,591 - I'm good. - Um. 39 00:01:30,631 --> 00:01:32,115 I'm good, dude. 40 00:01:32,155 --> 00:01:33,390 Thank you, though. 41 00:01:36,191 --> 00:01:37,295 Who's he? 42 00:01:37,363 --> 00:01:40,260 Josh, their name is Tam, okay? 43 00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:42,981 You can't just assume everyone's pronouns, buddy. 44 00:01:43,675 --> 00:01:46,135 Okay, I'm gonna be down in the shop 45 00:01:46,175 --> 00:01:47,895 in case anyone needs me. 46 00:01:53,574 --> 00:01:55,288 Josh, good morning. 47 00:01:55,552 --> 00:01:57,429 Hey, good morning. 48 00:01:57,701 --> 00:01:59,608 You haven't been returning any of my messages. 49 00:01:59,912 --> 00:02:03,218 I know, it's... look, it's just been a crazy week. 50 00:02:03,427 --> 00:02:05,430 Josh, I need an answer. 51 00:02:06,193 --> 00:02:07,346 I know. I'm figuring it out. 52 00:02:07,386 --> 00:02:10,522 Just... give me 24 hours. 53 00:02:10,701 --> 00:02:12,538 Okay, 24 hours. 54 00:02:13,443 --> 00:02:16,356 ♪ I choose me again and again ♪ 55 00:02:16,396 --> 00:02:19,473 ♪ 'Cause I chose you again and again ♪ *Younger* Season 05 Episode 05 56 00:02:19,513 --> 00:02:22,434 ♪ Don't give any damn I don't care ♪ *Younger* Episode Title: "Big Little Liza" 57 00:02:22,474 --> 00:02:25,566 ♪ Gave you all I can of me babe ♪ Synchronized by srjanapala 58 00:02:25,606 --> 00:02:26,696 Guys, I'm sorry. 59 00:02:26,736 --> 00:02:29,080 It's just it's the busiest season of the year. 60 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:31,295 There's all these schmoozing events before the mid-terms. 61 00:02:31,335 --> 00:02:33,075 We totally understand that. 62 00:02:33,115 --> 00:02:36,458 But last Thursday, we had a drop-dead date for chapter one 63 00:02:36,498 --> 00:02:39,632 and yet still no chapter one. 64 00:02:40,955 --> 00:02:43,950 Okay, no more excuses. 65 00:02:43,990 --> 00:02:46,536 After this Arianna Huffington event tonight, 66 00:02:46,576 --> 00:02:48,145 I will hit the ground running. 67 00:02:48,185 --> 00:02:50,157 Ooh, what Arianna Huffington event? 68 00:02:50,197 --> 00:02:52,481 It's on ♪negativethinking. 69 00:02:52,521 --> 00:02:56,089 Oh, yet another Twitter movement that I'm behind on. 70 00:02:56,129 --> 00:02:59,226 No, it's just an excuse to drink and to talk about how 71 00:02:59,266 --> 00:03:02,433 liberals are still arguing about Bernie versus Hillary. 72 00:03:02,473 --> 00:03:04,968 It's cathartic, I think. 73 00:03:05,817 --> 00:03:07,553 You should... you should come with me. 74 00:03:07,857 --> 00:03:09,397 I would love to. 75 00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:12,213 Sorry, I've only got a plus-one. 76 00:03:12,253 --> 00:03:13,299 Oh, that's fine. 77 00:03:13,339 --> 00:03:15,483 I don't have the energy for that accent tonight. 78 00:03:15,611 --> 00:03:16,740 You kids have fun. 79 00:03:16,787 --> 00:03:18,155 Don't worry about me. 80 00:03:25,404 --> 00:03:28,624 ♪ Open and free your mind ♪ 81 00:03:29,093 --> 00:03:32,794 ♪ Shoe 'em everything that's living deep deep inside ♪ 82 00:03:32,834 --> 00:03:34,473 ♪ Tick-tock tick-tock ♪ 83 00:03:34,513 --> 00:03:37,265 ♪ I'm about to explode ♪ 84 00:03:37,982 --> 00:03:40,944 ♪ Gotta gotta express yourself ♪ 85 00:03:47,812 --> 00:03:49,428 Popular, popular guy here. 86 00:03:49,468 --> 00:03:50,648 Yeah... 87 00:03:52,141 --> 00:03:54,162 Okay, sorry I keep parading you around here. 88 00:03:54,202 --> 00:03:56,881 Just talking about myself always makes me nervous. 89 00:03:56,921 --> 00:03:58,128 Really? 90 00:03:58,468 --> 00:04:00,490 It doesn't seem to bother you on your podcast. 91 00:04:00,530 --> 00:04:04,014 You know, strangely, I think I am most comfortable 92 00:04:04,054 --> 00:04:06,211 either in a crowd or alone. 93 00:04:06,359 --> 00:04:10,344 One-on-one, I'm... terrible. 94 00:04:11,929 --> 00:04:13,182 You're doing fine. 95 00:04:13,222 --> 00:04:14,574 Thanks. 96 00:04:15,160 --> 00:04:16,197 Jake. 97 00:04:16,266 --> 00:04:18,947 Oh, good. Here comes a crowd. 98 00:04:19,152 --> 00:04:22,932 Uh! Guys, this is my editor, Kelsey Peters. 99 00:04:22,972 --> 00:04:24,899 - Hi. - Kelsey, this is Levitt 100 00:04:24,939 --> 00:04:26,016 and Charlotte. 101 00:04:26,056 --> 00:04:28,745 Their co-hosts of the podcast and spent some time 102 00:04:28,785 --> 00:04:29,878 with me in the White House. 103 00:04:29,918 --> 00:04:31,055 I know who they are. 104 00:04:31,095 --> 00:04:32,823 Still can't believe you got a book deal before me. 105 00:04:32,863 --> 00:04:35,682 I read "Conversations With My Doodle" and loved it. 106 00:04:35,722 --> 00:04:38,565 And surprisingly, not ironically. 107 00:04:38,605 --> 00:04:40,863 That book was a surprise to all of us. 108 00:04:40,903 --> 00:04:42,823 Kelsey just signed a content deal 109 00:04:42,863 --> 00:04:44,229 with Reese Witherspoon's company. 110 00:04:44,269 --> 00:04:45,690 What? Okay, don't move. 111 00:04:45,730 --> 00:04:46,784 We're gonna get you a drink, 112 00:04:46,824 --> 00:04:48,096 and you're gonna tell us everything. 113 00:04:48,136 --> 00:04:49,597 Okay. 114 00:04:51,369 --> 00:04:52,611 Come on. 115 00:04:52,994 --> 00:04:55,684 I don't want to share you tonight. 116 00:05:01,177 --> 00:05:02,548 - Ohh. - How about that view? 117 00:05:02,652 --> 00:05:03,949 Come on. 118 00:05:04,576 --> 00:05:06,661 God, I love this city. 119 00:05:07,402 --> 00:05:10,700 - There. - Oh, thanks. 120 00:05:13,266 --> 00:05:15,016 When do you go back to D.C.? 121 00:05:15,238 --> 00:05:16,708 Tomorrow morning. 122 00:05:17,144 --> 00:05:19,177 Wish I could stay longer. 123 00:05:21,824 --> 00:05:23,119 Can I kiss you? 124 00:05:23,251 --> 00:05:24,509 What? 125 00:05:25,300 --> 00:05:26,775 Sorry. 126 00:05:26,955 --> 00:05:28,420 I just thought that 127 00:05:28,460 --> 00:05:32,860 Obama's speech writer would... be a little smoother than that. 128 00:05:32,900 --> 00:05:35,940 Oh, well, it worked on Michelle. 129 00:05:36,438 --> 00:05:37,657 I'm kidding. 130 00:05:37,697 --> 00:05:39,667 - Kidding. - Oh. 131 00:05:39,915 --> 00:05:41,503 I wish you weren't. 132 00:05:41,642 --> 00:05:43,586 That would be so good in the book. 133 00:05:43,626 --> 00:05:44,744 Yeah. 134 00:05:45,228 --> 00:05:47,315 You really only care about the book? 135 00:05:48,079 --> 00:05:50,026 I am your editor. 136 00:05:50,391 --> 00:05:52,674 Still haven't answered my question. 137 00:05:57,963 --> 00:06:00,579 ♪ Open my eyes all I see ♪ 138 00:06:00,619 --> 00:06:04,323 ♪ Are your dark brown eyes looking at me ♪ 139 00:06:06,587 --> 00:06:08,954 Falafels are on me. 140 00:06:08,994 --> 00:06:10,001 Thank you. 141 00:06:10,069 --> 00:06:14,292 My article on "Where Are They Now: The Members of O-Town" 142 00:06:14,408 --> 00:06:16,006 just got 100,000 views, so... 143 00:06:16,046 --> 00:06:19,191 - Oh, well, congratulations? - Thank you. 144 00:06:19,231 --> 00:06:20,393 - Oh. - Ooh. 145 00:06:20,439 --> 00:06:21,954 Sorry, it's icy. 146 00:06:21,994 --> 00:06:23,040 I gotcha. 147 00:06:23,126 --> 00:06:24,423 Thank you. 148 00:06:24,781 --> 00:06:29,253 Yeah, I'm... I'm doing a series of "Where Are They Nows." 149 00:06:29,298 --> 00:06:31,456 The next one's on my dignity. 150 00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:34,063 Well, you do what you've got to do to pay the bills. 151 00:06:34,103 --> 00:06:35,298 Yep. 152 00:06:35,704 --> 00:06:38,414 I still have to put together a listicle of GIFs 153 00:06:38,454 --> 00:06:39,797 called "Nun fails." 154 00:06:39,837 --> 00:06:41,322 Yeah. 155 00:06:42,306 --> 00:06:43,806 Oh, sorry. 156 00:06:44,454 --> 00:06:47,198 Oh, my God. 157 00:06:47,494 --> 00:06:48,842 I was not prepared for that. 158 00:06:48,882 --> 00:06:49,938 What is it? 159 00:06:49,978 --> 00:06:51,243 My son sent me a picture... 160 00:06:51,283 --> 00:06:53,253 - Oh, can I see? - Of his penis. 161 00:06:53,300 --> 00:06:55,378 Did you ask for that? 162 00:06:56,134 --> 00:06:57,347 He's 16, and he thinks 163 00:06:57,387 --> 00:06:59,081 he might have herpes. 164 00:06:59,697 --> 00:07:01,364 And how does it look? 165 00:07:01,404 --> 00:07:04,745 Um, like a teenager who masturbated too much. 166 00:07:05,862 --> 00:07:08,557 Sounds like you're close. 167 00:07:09,582 --> 00:07:12,047 As a divorced dad, I try to be there for him 168 00:07:12,087 --> 00:07:13,464 without judgment. 169 00:07:14,009 --> 00:07:16,219 I just don't understand this generation's need 170 00:07:16,259 --> 00:07:18,021 to share everything. 171 00:07:18,583 --> 00:07:20,261 Well, at least he's not posting 172 00:07:20,301 --> 00:07:22,778 a picture of his penis online and mushing it into 173 00:07:22,818 --> 00:07:24,381 a loaf of pumpernickel. 174 00:07:24,622 --> 00:07:26,036 What? 175 00:07:26,364 --> 00:07:27,729 Never mind. 176 00:07:27,769 --> 00:07:29,252 Oh! 177 00:07:29,383 --> 00:07:30,576 - Oh, my God. - Oh, my... 178 00:07:30,616 --> 00:07:32,752 - Are... are you okay? - Oh, my God. 179 00:07:34,305 --> 00:07:36,223 I'm fine. So sorry. 180 00:07:36,321 --> 00:07:38,494 Let me... let me just get my stuff. 181 00:07:38,946 --> 00:07:40,822 - Ohh. - Ahh. 182 00:07:43,118 --> 00:07:45,056 Here's your license. 183 00:07:45,118 --> 00:07:49,509 And here's your other license. 184 00:07:59,424 --> 00:08:00,783 That's crazy. 185 00:08:01,007 --> 00:08:03,361 You're basically living a double life. 186 00:08:04,283 --> 00:08:05,826 I see it like this. 187 00:08:06,102 --> 00:08:09,650 The world is ageist, and until that changes, 188 00:08:09,723 --> 00:08:11,072 I can't play by the rules. 189 00:08:11,146 --> 00:08:12,360 So true. 190 00:08:12,805 --> 00:08:14,141 You are clever. 191 00:08:14,194 --> 00:08:15,517 I have to be. 192 00:08:15,896 --> 00:08:18,509 I have a daughter in college to support. 193 00:08:19,408 --> 00:08:21,759 And no one has found out? 194 00:08:22,789 --> 00:08:25,614 Well, let me just say that I wish I didn't have to continue 195 00:08:25,654 --> 00:08:27,523 the charade, but I have to to keep 196 00:08:27,563 --> 00:08:29,004 the millennial brand intact. 197 00:08:29,131 --> 00:08:30,360 Wow. 198 00:08:31,076 --> 00:08:32,647 You are my hero. 199 00:08:32,687 --> 00:08:34,736 I am nobody's hero. 200 00:08:35,359 --> 00:08:36,970 I'm a fraud. 201 00:08:37,930 --> 00:08:39,869 But you do what you have to do. 202 00:08:39,981 --> 00:08:44,703 Well, I can't pretend to be a hot young woman, 203 00:08:44,743 --> 00:08:47,205 but hopefully I can think of something. 204 00:08:47,687 --> 00:08:49,627 You're so talented. 205 00:08:50,147 --> 00:08:51,320 You will. 206 00:09:04,812 --> 00:09:08,157 Uh! Hey, Caitlin, it's... it's me again. 207 00:09:08,197 --> 00:09:10,586 I'm not sure if you got my last message. 208 00:09:10,626 --> 00:09:14,053 I just... just want to see what you're up to, honey. 209 00:09:14,093 --> 00:09:17,121 If you're satisfied with your message, hang up... 210 00:09:17,161 --> 00:09:18,566 - Damn it. - Or press... 211 00:09:33,964 --> 00:09:35,851 How was Arianna Huffington's party? 212 00:09:35,891 --> 00:09:36,960 Fine. 213 00:09:37,028 --> 00:09:38,840 Levitt tagged you in a picture. 214 00:09:40,096 --> 00:09:42,121 You and Jake look cozy. 215 00:09:42,462 --> 00:09:45,763 Cozier than an author and his editor should be. 216 00:09:45,807 --> 00:09:46,995 Calm down. 217 00:09:47,063 --> 00:09:51,215 We look cozy, because we're sitting on a velvet couch. 218 00:09:51,410 --> 00:09:53,973 Look, I can tell this guy's got a crush on you. 219 00:09:54,033 --> 00:09:55,643 You're too smart to do something 220 00:09:55,683 --> 00:09:57,457 to jeopardize this book. 221 00:09:57,830 --> 00:10:00,270 You're right. I am. 222 00:10:01,510 --> 00:10:03,973 So I don't need to hear it from you. 223 00:10:27,568 --> 00:10:29,694 Hey, is this a blow off? 224 00:10:30,018 --> 00:10:31,824 It seems like he actually has work. 225 00:10:31,864 --> 00:10:33,369 I mean, you can't assume that everyone's lying 226 00:10:33,409 --> 00:10:35,257 just because you are. 227 00:10:36,006 --> 00:10:37,221 - Hi. - Hey. 228 00:10:37,261 --> 00:10:39,483 This event is so cool. 229 00:10:39,586 --> 00:10:41,317 I know. I know. 230 00:10:41,357 --> 00:10:43,797 - Lip stain? - Oh, do I eat it or wear it? 231 00:10:43,863 --> 00:10:45,726 I'm not here to tell you what to do. 232 00:10:46,240 --> 00:10:48,061 I'll try it. I'm starving. 233 00:10:49,170 --> 00:10:50,569 Aren't they great? 234 00:10:50,654 --> 00:10:52,348 - Who? - Tam, 235 00:10:52,388 --> 00:10:54,128 my assistant. You just met them. 236 00:10:54,177 --> 00:10:55,574 I only saw one person. 237 00:10:55,614 --> 00:10:57,069 Tam is gender-queer. 238 00:10:57,145 --> 00:10:58,429 Gender-queer? 239 00:10:58,588 --> 00:11:00,668 Oh. Oh, so he's bi? 240 00:11:00,708 --> 00:11:02,339 Oh, my God. Liza, no. Please, do not... no, 241 00:11:02,379 --> 00:11:03,859 do not use that word here. 242 00:11:03,899 --> 00:11:05,971 Tam's pan-sexual, homo-romantic, 243 00:11:06,011 --> 00:11:07,965 and their pronouns are they, them, and there. 244 00:11:08,005 --> 00:11:09,562 All right, no more questions. It's offensive. 245 00:11:09,602 --> 00:11:12,362 The LGBTQIAPK community has been through enough. 246 00:11:12,402 --> 00:11:13,929 You lost me after T. 247 00:11:13,969 --> 00:11:16,653 Lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, queer, questioning, 248 00:11:16,693 --> 00:11:18,973 intersex, asexual, pan, poly, kink. 249 00:11:19,013 --> 00:11:20,348 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 250 00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:22,655 Please keep your mingling to a minimum. 251 00:11:22,883 --> 00:11:25,822 Ooh, I was less confused in the closet. 252 00:11:26,467 --> 00:11:28,048 Ooh, how's the mascara? 253 00:11:28,180 --> 00:11:29,575 It tastes like burnt ass. 254 00:11:29,615 --> 00:11:31,590 You know what? I'm gonna go find some real food. 255 00:11:31,630 --> 00:11:32,900 I'll be back. 256 00:11:33,207 --> 00:11:34,509 Hmm, nutty. 257 00:11:35,684 --> 00:11:37,126 Who are you texting? 258 00:11:37,422 --> 00:11:38,520 Jake Devereux. 259 00:11:38,560 --> 00:11:39,726 The Obama guy? 260 00:11:39,766 --> 00:11:41,661 He's cute and funny. 261 00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:43,655 Uh-oh, you sure that's a good idea. 262 00:11:43,695 --> 00:11:46,822 I hung out with him last night as his editor. 263 00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:50,446 Okay, and we kissed. 264 00:11:51,447 --> 00:11:53,134 And I think I like him. 265 00:11:53,187 --> 00:11:55,431 - Kelsey. - I know. 266 00:11:57,299 --> 00:11:59,064 Just eat your mascara. 267 00:12:06,325 --> 00:12:07,602 Tam, lean in. 268 00:12:07,642 --> 00:12:09,462 I will not. This is humiliating. 269 00:12:09,556 --> 00:12:12,483 Oh. Yes. No, you're right. You're right. Selfies are dead. 270 00:12:12,523 --> 00:12:15,086 Ooh, Maggie, Maggie, will you take a picture of us? 271 00:12:15,126 --> 00:12:17,384 - Yeah, sure. - No. 272 00:12:17,799 --> 00:12:19,465 You're making a spectacle. 273 00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:21,333 Yeah, that's the whole point. 274 00:12:21,373 --> 00:12:24,261 Lauren, everything can't be in all-caps. 275 00:12:24,671 --> 00:12:25,832 What do you mean? 276 00:12:25,872 --> 00:12:27,665 Let me put this another way. 277 00:12:27,768 --> 00:12:30,173 It's not cool. 278 00:12:30,301 --> 00:12:32,108 Nobody posts anymore. 279 00:12:32,148 --> 00:12:33,207 It's all word of mouth. 280 00:12:33,247 --> 00:12:36,233 Ow, yes. No, no, okay, I was just being ironic. 281 00:12:36,273 --> 00:12:37,474 This is for my finsta. 282 00:12:37,514 --> 00:12:39,057 That's "fake Instagram." 283 00:12:39,171 --> 00:12:41,215 Millennials are so sad. 284 00:12:42,844 --> 00:12:44,386 Oh, my God. 285 00:12:44,457 --> 00:12:46,523 Okay, that just happened. I'm old. 286 00:12:46,563 --> 00:12:48,584 - Don't make me choke you out. - What's wrong? 287 00:12:48,624 --> 00:12:50,226 Tam's being a dick. 288 00:12:50,266 --> 00:12:52,048 They just told Lauren that she's irrelevant. 289 00:12:52,088 --> 00:12:53,491 They're right, Liza. They are. 290 00:12:53,531 --> 00:12:55,109 They're right. Millennials are over. 291 00:12:55,149 --> 00:12:58,511 - We are done. - No, we're still happenin'. 292 00:12:58,609 --> 00:13:01,066 You know, getting older isn't so bad. 293 00:13:01,158 --> 00:13:03,793 Maybe you want to try it sometime. 294 00:13:10,159 --> 00:13:13,059 Hey, what's going on? 295 00:13:13,605 --> 00:13:16,137 You want to come say good-bye to Inkburg? 296 00:13:16,205 --> 00:13:17,990 What are you talking about? 297 00:13:18,284 --> 00:13:20,442 I'm done with this place, Liza. 298 00:13:21,167 --> 00:13:24,150 Okay, just... you stay right there. 299 00:13:24,190 --> 00:13:25,614 I'm coming over. 300 00:13:39,591 --> 00:13:41,652 Sorry, ma'am, we are closed. 301 00:13:41,814 --> 00:13:45,085 I already got my tattoo, thank you. 302 00:13:45,391 --> 00:13:46,646 What's going on? 303 00:13:46,686 --> 00:13:52,752 My landlord wants me to sign a ten-year lease or vacate. 304 00:13:52,792 --> 00:13:55,007 Whoa, look who's an adult. 305 00:13:57,173 --> 00:13:58,843 I think I'm gonna vacate. 306 00:13:58,959 --> 00:14:01,913 Wh... you're gonna give Inkburg up? 307 00:14:02,286 --> 00:14:03,921 What are you gonna do instead? 308 00:14:03,994 --> 00:14:05,679 Anything, really. 309 00:14:05,898 --> 00:14:09,874 I could rent a chair at a tattoo shop in Portland, 310 00:14:09,935 --> 00:14:11,088 Silver Lake. 311 00:14:11,128 --> 00:14:13,773 This place is your passion, your soul. 312 00:14:15,938 --> 00:14:19,319 I just don't know if there's anything here for me anymore. 313 00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:26,210 I don't know if I have it in my to make any more commitments. 314 00:14:26,396 --> 00:14:27,999 Are you kidding? 315 00:14:29,732 --> 00:14:32,906 This is a commitment. This is a commitment. 316 00:14:32,946 --> 00:14:35,577 All of these are commitments to yourself. 317 00:14:35,887 --> 00:14:38,396 You can't go wrong committing to yourself. 318 00:14:38,706 --> 00:14:40,076 Trust me. 319 00:14:43,754 --> 00:14:45,029 Trust you. 320 00:14:47,071 --> 00:14:49,580 How can I be sure 321 00:14:49,851 --> 00:14:54,765 that this place is my future. 322 00:14:55,067 --> 00:14:57,210 And what's keeping me here? 323 00:14:58,123 --> 00:15:00,085 You've got all of us, 324 00:15:00,875 --> 00:15:04,798 Maggie and Kelsey, and you've got me. 325 00:15:09,095 --> 00:15:13,294 No, I don't have you. 326 00:15:20,034 --> 00:15:22,702 I'm gonna clean up a little bit. 327 00:15:26,955 --> 00:15:28,780 Good night, Liza. 328 00:15:33,564 --> 00:15:35,135 ♪ Yeah yeah yeah ♪ 329 00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:39,969 ♪ Oh Mona Lisa feel that beat ♪ 330 00:15:40,009 --> 00:15:42,221 ♪ This heat gonna light that fire ♪ 331 00:15:45,602 --> 00:15:48,799 ♪ Oh Mona Lisa I know we're gonna start that fire ♪ 332 00:15:52,839 --> 00:15:54,884 - Liza Miller speaking. - Hi, there. 333 00:15:54,924 --> 00:15:57,118 This is May from "Vanity Fair." 334 00:15:57,158 --> 00:15:59,720 I'm checking some details for a story about you. 335 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:00,809 About me? 336 00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:03,134 - You and "Millennial." - Oh, okay. 337 00:16:03,174 --> 00:16:06,282 I see here that you are one of the co-founders 338 00:16:06,322 --> 00:16:07,720 of "Millennial Print." 339 00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:11,037 - Yes. - And that you're 41. 340 00:16:12,873 --> 00:16:15,806 Uh... who's writing this article? 341 00:16:15,846 --> 00:16:18,363 Don Ridley. Can we confirm your age? 342 00:16:19,032 --> 00:16:21,321 Hey, we're late for the Reese meeting. 343 00:16:21,361 --> 00:16:22,618 Okay, I've got to go. Bye-bye. 344 00:16:22,658 --> 00:16:24,363 Let's go. Let's go. 345 00:16:26,184 --> 00:16:27,346 Come on. 346 00:16:28,184 --> 00:16:29,902 You told Don your real age? 347 00:16:29,942 --> 00:16:32,978 No, he saw both my IDs when I slipped on ice 348 00:16:33,018 --> 00:16:34,292 and dropped my bag. 349 00:16:34,338 --> 00:16:36,384 Well, why didn't you make up a story, 350 00:16:36,424 --> 00:16:39,290 like, tell him you were trying to get discounts or something? 351 00:16:39,330 --> 00:16:41,181 - On what? - I don't know. 352 00:16:41,221 --> 00:16:42,452 What do old people buy? 353 00:16:42,492 --> 00:16:44,730 I'm not a senior citizen, and that's not the point. 354 00:16:44,770 --> 00:16:47,824 "Vanity Fair" is going to publish an article exposing me. 355 00:16:47,893 --> 00:16:49,197 What? 356 00:16:50,529 --> 00:16:52,649 Oh, my God. They're calling me now. 357 00:16:52,689 --> 00:16:53,764 Don't answer it. 358 00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:55,470 Okay, we cannot deal with this. 359 00:16:55,510 --> 00:16:58,235 Whatever we do, we cannot let Reese's people know. 360 00:16:58,275 --> 00:16:59,417 Not a word. 361 00:16:59,471 --> 00:17:00,496 Ahh. 362 00:17:00,564 --> 00:17:02,003 Okay, let me see. 363 00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:04,446 New phone. Who dis? 364 00:17:04,486 --> 00:17:06,386 ♪ Hey hey ♪ 365 00:17:11,149 --> 00:17:12,535 I received a very unsettling phone call 366 00:17:12,575 --> 00:17:14,294 from a fact-checker this morning. 367 00:17:14,334 --> 00:17:17,222 She was insinuating something very odd about your age. 368 00:17:17,546 --> 00:17:19,040 Reese is in pieces. 369 00:17:19,890 --> 00:17:22,382 Liza, how old are you? 370 00:17:23,701 --> 00:17:24,945 I'm... 371 00:17:28,523 --> 00:17:29,859 Age-queer. 372 00:17:30,529 --> 00:17:32,727 - What? - I'm age-queer. 373 00:17:33,419 --> 00:17:35,749 That fact-checker was trying to age-shame us for being young, 374 00:17:35,789 --> 00:17:38,968 so I told them I'm old in protest. 375 00:17:39,101 --> 00:17:40,176 And it's, like, who cares? 376 00:17:40,216 --> 00:17:42,011 I don't identify as any age. 377 00:17:42,051 --> 00:17:43,095 Neither do I. 378 00:17:43,135 --> 00:17:45,972 They were so focused on how successful we were for our age, 379 00:17:46,012 --> 00:17:47,894 and it shouldn't matter how old we are. 380 00:17:47,934 --> 00:17:49,005 Exactly. 381 00:17:49,153 --> 00:17:50,212 Screw them. 382 00:17:50,252 --> 00:17:51,324 Who's them? 383 00:17:51,364 --> 00:17:52,592 The patriarchy. 384 00:17:52,632 --> 00:17:54,144 So I told them I'm 41. 385 00:17:54,184 --> 00:17:55,712 And let them think that for all I care. 386 00:17:55,752 --> 00:17:57,467 We're post-age. 387 00:17:57,529 --> 00:18:00,971 But how old... I'm confused. 388 00:18:01,011 --> 00:18:03,661 It's confusing, but it's not wrong. 389 00:18:03,701 --> 00:18:05,833 - Mm-mm. - Every time you get a bunch of 390 00:18:05,873 --> 00:18:07,824 strong, powerful women together, 391 00:18:07,864 --> 00:18:10,136 it's their looks, their age. 392 00:18:10,176 --> 00:18:11,418 They're too young. They're too sexy. 393 00:18:11,458 --> 00:18:14,033 I mean, what are they gonna do, throw us in "The Handmaid's Tale"? 394 00:18:14,073 --> 00:18:15,575 Under his eye, girl. 395 00:18:17,251 --> 00:18:20,325 Kiara, it's the fact-checker again. 396 00:18:21,656 --> 00:18:23,349 I'll handle them. 397 00:18:28,184 --> 00:18:29,735 - Age-queer? - I... 398 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:32,776 - That was insane. - Yeah, and probably offensive. 399 00:18:32,816 --> 00:18:35,198 Liza, we have to stop this story. 400 00:18:35,238 --> 00:18:36,287 I know. 401 00:18:36,356 --> 00:18:37,948 I'm gonna go find Don right now. 402 00:18:37,988 --> 00:18:39,464 Before he stopped texting, he mentioned 403 00:18:39,504 --> 00:18:41,149 a luncheon for Broadway Cares. 404 00:18:41,189 --> 00:18:42,297 That's a nice charity. 405 00:18:42,337 --> 00:18:45,341 The only thing Don cares about is the free food. 406 00:19:06,460 --> 00:19:07,745 Don. 407 00:19:08,175 --> 00:19:09,229 Liza. 408 00:19:09,297 --> 00:19:11,088 I was the story you were working on. 409 00:19:11,128 --> 00:19:13,158 How could you do that to me? 410 00:19:13,198 --> 00:19:15,411 I thought that I met a man that I liked, 411 00:19:15,472 --> 00:19:17,166 that I trusted. 412 00:19:17,206 --> 00:19:18,488 I'm sorry. 413 00:19:18,909 --> 00:19:21,526 I'm a freelancer. I need to dig up stories. 414 00:19:21,566 --> 00:19:23,481 And you're a really great one. 415 00:19:23,558 --> 00:19:24,627 You said it yourself. 416 00:19:24,667 --> 00:19:25,937 You do what you have to do. 417 00:19:25,977 --> 00:19:28,979 Not at the expense of destroying someone else. 418 00:19:29,019 --> 00:19:30,596 This story might end up being the best thing 419 00:19:30,636 --> 00:19:31,666 that ever happened to you. 420 00:19:31,706 --> 00:19:33,257 I could make you the poster child for ageism. 421 00:19:33,297 --> 00:19:37,083 And also kill my career and damage "Millennial." 422 00:19:38,874 --> 00:19:41,237 Well, none of that's gonna happen. 423 00:19:41,277 --> 00:19:42,612 They just pulled it. 424 00:19:42,652 --> 00:19:44,541 There' some social media thing that's exploding 425 00:19:44,581 --> 00:19:48,033 about being age-queer, whatever that means. 426 00:19:48,073 --> 00:19:50,862 Suddenly everyone's sensitive to age-shaming. 427 00:19:50,902 --> 00:19:54,208 Oh, wow. Good. 428 00:19:54,495 --> 00:19:56,221 They should be sensitive to it. 429 00:19:56,261 --> 00:19:58,323 Yeah, and once again, I'm out. 430 00:19:58,363 --> 00:19:59,721 You know, it seems like the only people who get 431 00:19:59,761 --> 00:20:01,721 discriminated against anymore are middle-aged 432 00:20:01,761 --> 00:20:03,033 straight white men. 433 00:20:03,073 --> 00:20:06,168 ♪ Me, okay? ♪ Me. 434 00:20:06,942 --> 00:20:09,770 You know, I think I might know why you can't find work. 435 00:20:09,909 --> 00:20:10,993 And why is that? 436 00:20:11,033 --> 00:20:13,262 Because you're an asshole, Don. 437 00:20:24,362 --> 00:20:25,598 You're an adult. 438 00:20:25,667 --> 00:20:27,279 Your life is your life. 439 00:20:27,417 --> 00:20:29,385 But why are you smashing your face into bread? 440 00:20:29,425 --> 00:20:30,947 Oh, my God. How did you see that? 441 00:20:30,987 --> 00:20:32,424 I feel like I don't know you anymore. 442 00:20:32,464 --> 00:20:34,080 Mom, it's not who I am. 443 00:20:34,120 --> 00:20:35,392 It's just a thing I do for some extra money. 444 00:20:35,432 --> 00:20:36,822 Okay, let me tell you something. 445 00:20:36,862 --> 00:20:39,801 You become what you do. 446 00:20:39,854 --> 00:20:41,939 If you cheat, you become a cheater. 447 00:20:41,979 --> 00:20:45,424 If you like, you... you become a liar. 448 00:20:45,464 --> 00:20:47,564 It's so easy for you. You're so perfect. 449 00:20:47,604 --> 00:20:50,588 Caitlin, I have done plenty of things in my life 450 00:20:50,628 --> 00:20:51,846 that I am not proud of. 451 00:20:51,886 --> 00:20:53,276 Like what? 452 00:20:54,425 --> 00:20:56,512 Someday I will tell you all about them. 453 00:20:56,557 --> 00:21:01,260 But for now, will you just stop breadfacing. 454 00:21:01,300 --> 00:21:03,496 Jeez, Mom, is it really that embarrassing? 455 00:21:06,799 --> 00:21:08,096 What? 456 00:21:11,075 --> 00:21:12,481 - Ohh. - Mom. 457 00:21:12,667 --> 00:21:14,447 - Oh, this is surprising. - Mom, stop. 458 00:21:14,487 --> 00:21:16,382 - People are watching. - Ooh, it's so soft. 459 00:21:16,422 --> 00:21:19,885 Ohh, yeah. Mmm. 460 00:21:19,925 --> 00:21:22,441 Okay, okay, I'll stop. 461 00:21:23,632 --> 00:21:26,152 God, you could really ruin anything. 462 00:21:26,276 --> 00:21:27,895 I love you too. 463 00:21:28,770 --> 00:21:29,971 Are you still gonna eat it? 464 00:21:30,011 --> 00:21:32,254 Of course I'm gonna eat that bread. 465 00:21:33,494 --> 00:21:34,763 I liked it on my chin. 466 00:21:34,803 --> 00:21:37,012 - Yep. - It was really crispy. 467 00:21:53,084 --> 00:21:54,992 Hey. What are you doing here? 468 00:21:55,043 --> 00:21:57,046 Josh, I can't let you do this. 469 00:21:57,146 --> 00:21:59,190 Who knows what the future holds, 470 00:21:59,230 --> 00:22:02,429 but... I know how much you love that place. 471 00:22:02,474 --> 00:22:03,831 This was your dream. 472 00:22:03,871 --> 00:22:05,362 You built it from nothing. 473 00:22:05,402 --> 00:22:06,851 It's who you are. 474 00:22:06,971 --> 00:22:08,968 Take that lease. 475 00:22:09,380 --> 00:22:10,772 I'm not going away. 476 00:22:10,812 --> 00:22:13,390 Kelsey and Maggie aren't going away. 477 00:22:13,458 --> 00:22:15,139 Your roots are here. 478 00:22:15,285 --> 00:22:17,351 I will be at your side. 479 00:22:17,504 --> 00:22:20,343 You don't have to commit to us, but we commit to you. 480 00:22:20,416 --> 00:22:22,163 I commit to you. 481 00:22:22,880 --> 00:22:25,281 I might not always be the same person in your life, 482 00:22:25,321 --> 00:22:28,171 but I will always be in your life. 483 00:22:31,050 --> 00:22:32,843 What are you talking about? 484 00:22:32,942 --> 00:22:35,570 The sign. They're taking it down. 485 00:22:38,394 --> 00:22:40,296 I'm just getting a bigger one. 486 00:22:40,924 --> 00:22:42,441 What? 487 00:22:43,304 --> 00:22:44,701 Josh. 488 00:22:46,538 --> 00:22:48,193 I'm not ready to give up yet. 489 00:22:48,233 --> 00:22:50,981 ♪ And I want you to be ♪ 490 00:22:51,021 --> 00:22:54,671 ♪ For the next few hundred years ♪ 491 00:22:54,811 --> 00:22:57,062 ♪ With me ♪ 34554

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