Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,439 --> 00:00:06,504
I highly doubt I'm the first person
to say this but... love is complicated.
2
00:00:06,506 --> 00:00:07,872
When you're in love,
3
00:00:07,930 --> 00:00:09,773
you see things differently
than everyone else.
4
00:00:13,579 --> 00:00:17,348
_
5
00:00:21,514 --> 00:00:23,954
I thought you said you were over Nori.
6
00:00:23,956 --> 00:00:25,323
I am. We're just friends.
7
00:00:25,355 --> 00:00:27,555
You're totally still
seeing her in slo-mo.
8
00:00:27,557 --> 00:00:28,890
I can tell because you've been trying
9
00:00:28,925 --> 00:00:31,494
to open Joey Zinman's
locker for five minutes.
10
00:00:32,546 --> 00:00:33,360
Sorry.
11
00:00:34,897 --> 00:00:36,664
And when love goes away
12
00:00:36,666 --> 00:00:38,499
it can take you a long
time to get over it.
13
00:00:38,501 --> 00:00:40,368
_
14
00:00:40,370 --> 00:00:42,636
- Hey, Alex.
- Oh.
15
00:00:42,638 --> 00:00:44,071
Good, my razors are here.
16
00:00:44,073 --> 00:00:46,006
Don't you dare shave that beard.
17
00:00:46,008 --> 00:00:47,475
Fine, just the legs.
18
00:00:49,011 --> 00:00:51,178
- Have a good one, Alex.
- You too, Susan.
19
00:00:54,117 --> 00:00:56,183
Dude, why don't you ask her out?
20
00:00:56,185 --> 00:00:57,651
That woman flirts with you
21
00:00:57,653 --> 00:00:59,253
every time she delivers a package.
22
00:00:59,255 --> 00:01:00,788
Oh, she was not flirting with me.
23
00:01:00,790 --> 00:01:02,456
Trust me, she is.
24
00:01:02,458 --> 00:01:03,891
You just can't see it
because you've been
25
00:01:03,893 --> 00:01:05,326
closed off ever since the divorce.
26
00:01:05,328 --> 00:01:06,494
We talked about this man.
27
00:01:06,496 --> 00:01:07,795
I'm just not ready yet.
28
00:01:07,797 --> 00:01:09,053
Well, you better get ready for it
29
00:01:09,099 --> 00:01:10,865
because I'm about to
order some light bulbs,
30
00:01:10,867 --> 00:01:13,000
and, yes, I'm paying extra
31
00:01:13,002 --> 00:01:15,403
for overnight delivery.
32
00:01:18,174 --> 00:01:19,807
Sometimes the pursuit of love
33
00:01:19,809 --> 00:01:22,343
makes you do things you
never thought you would.
34
00:01:22,578 --> 00:01:23,578
_
35
00:01:23,579 --> 00:01:25,780
- Go on, press another one.
- I don't have time for this.
36
00:01:25,782 --> 00:01:27,715
I have to get my house
ready for the fundraiser.
37
00:01:27,717 --> 00:01:29,517
Plus, these dating sites are stupid.
38
00:01:29,519 --> 00:01:33,354
Hey, this isn't some old-fashioned,
cheesy dating site like Tinder.
39
00:01:33,356 --> 00:01:34,989
This is a highly sophisticated service
40
00:01:34,991 --> 00:01:36,657
that uses advanced algorithms
41
00:01:36,659 --> 00:01:38,192
to help you make a
meaningful connection.
42
00:01:38,194 --> 00:01:40,261
Now press her face so we can judge her.
43
00:01:42,965 --> 00:01:44,999
- Hi, I'm Debbie.
- Bye, Debbie.
44
00:01:45,001 --> 00:01:47,101
What was wrong with her?
45
00:01:47,674 --> 00:01:49,203
I didn't like the way she said "hi."
46
00:01:49,205 --> 00:01:51,939
You're not giving anyone a chance
because you're still stuck on Eleanor.
47
00:01:51,941 --> 00:01:54,341
I am not stuck on Eleanor.
48
00:01:54,343 --> 00:01:56,677
I just like the way she says hi.
49
00:01:58,448 --> 00:02:00,781
Fine, I'll give Debbie another chance.
50
00:02:01,785 --> 00:02:02,750
I love a night out
51
00:02:02,752 --> 00:02:05,519
on the town or staying in,
curling up with a good book.
52
00:02:05,521 --> 00:02:07,221
Uch.
53
00:02:07,223 --> 00:02:08,456
She's all over the map.
54
00:02:08,458 --> 00:02:10,324
Debbie, come on, pick a lane.
55
00:02:10,326 --> 00:02:12,893
So, I guess the bottom line is...
56
00:02:12,895 --> 00:02:15,996
I hate love.
57
00:02:25,612 --> 00:02:27,313
And the best part
about being an inventor
58
00:02:27,318 --> 00:02:30,084
is that when you see a problem,
you get to fix it.
59
00:02:30,086 --> 00:02:32,353
And the only problem I see today...
60
00:02:32,355 --> 00:02:35,556
is that you guys don't have any candy.
61
00:02:36,893 --> 00:02:37,825
Wow.
62
00:02:37,878 --> 00:02:42,563
Ladies and gentlemen, introducing
the Riley Industries Candy-Pult 5000,
63
00:02:42,565 --> 00:02:44,498
patent pending.
64
00:02:49,639 --> 00:02:52,172
Thank you Mr. Riley for
that wonderful presentation,
65
00:02:52,174 --> 00:02:55,476
and for giving a bunch of eight
year olds sugar, then leaving.
66
00:02:55,478 --> 00:02:57,545
- Great job, Dad.
- Thank you, sweetie.
67
00:02:57,547 --> 00:02:59,280
Now we're gonna hear from Jasmine's dad,
68
00:02:59,282 --> 00:03:01,815
and he's gonna tell us about his job.
69
00:03:02,555 --> 00:03:03,784
I thought we agreed no candy.
70
00:03:03,786 --> 00:03:05,819
Now all I got is this damn PowerPoint.
71
00:03:05,821 --> 00:03:07,151
Come on, man, you're gonna be great.
72
00:03:07,156 --> 00:03:09,323
Kids love detailed business plans.
73
00:03:10,226 --> 00:03:12,960
Hey, man, that thing packs some power.
74
00:03:12,962 --> 00:03:14,528
Caught a Smartie way back here.
75
00:03:14,530 --> 00:03:16,263
Oh, yeah,
it can launch a Skittle 50 yards.
76
00:03:16,265 --> 00:03:18,165
It can launch a peanut M&M 50 yards.
77
00:03:18,167 --> 00:03:20,367
50 yards seems to be the range.
78
00:03:20,369 --> 00:03:21,702
Hey, you one of the new dads?
79
00:03:21,704 --> 00:03:23,370
- I'm Alex.
- Oh, hey. Ben.
80
00:03:23,372 --> 00:03:25,339
Hey. Gosh, you look so familiar to me.
81
00:03:25,341 --> 00:03:26,807
Do I know you from somewhere?
82
00:03:26,809 --> 00:03:28,342
I was just thinking the same thing.
83
00:03:28,344 --> 00:03:29,777
Do you workout at Crossfit Glendale?
84
00:03:33,977 --> 00:03:35,382
Oh, you were serious. No.
85
00:03:35,384 --> 00:03:36,884
No, that's not me.
86
00:03:36,886 --> 00:03:38,886
That's why we always
want to be conservative
87
00:03:38,888 --> 00:03:40,554
with our quarterly projections.
88
00:03:43,125 --> 00:03:44,625
Damn it, Alex.
89
00:03:46,162 --> 00:03:47,361
Hey, little bro.
90
00:03:47,363 --> 00:03:49,737
I think I have the perfect plan
to get you and Nori together.
91
00:03:49,832 --> 00:03:51,531
Well, it's not going to be
worse than your last plan
92
00:03:51,534 --> 00:03:53,400
- to get us together.
- Again...
93
00:03:53,402 --> 00:03:55,169
You were supposed to eat
a mint then kiss her.
94
00:03:55,171 --> 00:03:56,870
Not choke on a mint
and spit it into her mouth
95
00:03:56,872 --> 00:03:58,672
like you were feeding a baby bird.
96
00:03:58,674 --> 00:04:00,341
What if I told you there was a day
97
00:04:00,343 --> 00:04:02,376
where the rules of school do not apply?
98
00:04:02,378 --> 00:04:05,446
Where everything that happened
in the past no longer matters?
99
00:04:05,448 --> 00:04:09,016
I speak, of course, of the field trip.
100
00:04:09,714 --> 00:04:10,818
Oh.
101
00:04:10,820 --> 00:04:12,886
You guys got a field trip coming up?
102
00:04:12,888 --> 00:04:15,255
I used to love field trips, you know.
103
00:04:15,257 --> 00:04:17,591
It's not school. It's not home.
104
00:04:17,593 --> 00:04:19,860
It's the wild west out there
where anything can happen,
105
00:04:19,862 --> 00:04:22,162
- and often does.
- Exactly.
106
00:04:22,164 --> 00:04:24,064
You know Josh Hubbard
and Kristina Wiggins?
107
00:04:24,066 --> 00:04:26,333
Yeah, the couple who are
basically joined at the tongue?
108
00:04:26,335 --> 00:04:29,236
Well, last year Josh was a geek
and Kristina was a cheerleader.
109
00:04:29,238 --> 00:04:31,005
He was nowhere on her radar.
110
00:04:31,007 --> 00:04:33,507
Then one visit to the
Colonial Farming Museum later,
111
00:04:33,509 --> 00:04:35,275
they're practically married.
112
00:04:35,277 --> 00:04:37,077
Classic field trip love story.
113
00:04:37,079 --> 00:04:38,445
See?
114
00:04:38,447 --> 00:04:40,080
- Okay, I'm in.
- Yes.
115
00:04:40,082 --> 00:04:41,715
Yeah, when I was in the seventh grade,
116
00:04:41,717 --> 00:04:44,418
my school went to the
American Heritage Museum.
117
00:04:44,420 --> 00:04:46,987
I ended up making out with Lori Shooter
118
00:04:46,989 --> 00:04:48,656
next to a stuffed bison.
119
00:04:48,658 --> 00:04:50,424
Was she the cutest girl in school?
120
00:04:50,426 --> 00:04:52,826
She was not.
121
00:04:52,828 --> 00:04:54,828
I was field tripped.
122
00:04:59,368 --> 00:05:01,268
There are a lot of attractive,
charitable women
123
00:05:01,270 --> 00:05:02,836
at this fundraiser.
124
00:05:02,838 --> 00:05:04,672
Maybe even charitable
enough to go out with you.
125
00:05:06,142 --> 00:05:07,408
Vodka cranberry, please.
126
00:05:07,410 --> 00:05:09,043
Vodka cranberry,
127
00:05:09,045 --> 00:05:10,744
the drink of sorority
girls the world over.
128
00:05:11,511 --> 00:05:12,346
Kelly Frasier.
129
00:05:12,348 --> 00:05:14,281
Surprised to see you in my house.
130
00:05:14,283 --> 00:05:16,283
I didn't notice your broomstick outside.
131
00:05:16,285 --> 00:05:17,818
Oh, this is your house?
132
00:05:17,820 --> 00:05:20,721
I thought it smelled like
un-met third quarter projections.
133
00:05:20,723 --> 00:05:22,322
No, that's your perfume.
134
00:05:22,324 --> 00:05:24,525
You... you're the smell.
135
00:05:24,527 --> 00:05:26,427
Ooh, that wasn't your best, Dad.
136
00:05:26,429 --> 00:05:28,162
"Dad"? Is this your daughter?
137
00:05:28,164 --> 00:05:31,999
Kelly, Abby. Abby, evil in human form.
138
00:05:32,001 --> 00:05:34,134
- Hi.
- Pleasure to meet you, Abby.
139
00:05:34,136 --> 00:05:35,936
Your father and I go way back.
140
00:05:35,938 --> 00:05:38,138
How long has my company
been outperforming yours?
141
00:05:38,140 --> 00:05:39,573
What, 15, 20 years?
142
00:05:39,575 --> 00:05:42,009
No, no that would be never years.
143
00:05:42,011 --> 00:05:43,744
Clever.
144
00:05:43,746 --> 00:05:45,312
Nice to meet you.
145
00:05:47,049 --> 00:05:49,283
I don't think she really
thought that was clever.
146
00:05:50,103 --> 00:05:51,151
What is she talking about?
147
00:05:51,153 --> 00:05:54,021
My company has always been
just as successful as hers.
148
00:05:54,023 --> 00:05:55,622
I've never seen you so rattled.
149
00:05:55,624 --> 00:05:57,573
Good thing you're retired.
You don't have to deal with her anymore.
150
00:05:57,594 --> 00:06:01,462
You're absolutely right.
I never have to think about her again.
151
00:06:02,355 --> 00:06:03,908
- Be right back.
- Where are you going?
152
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:07,334
I just thought of a great comeback.
153
00:06:09,138 --> 00:06:12,139
Okay. So we've packed
the most tradable snacks,
154
00:06:12,141 --> 00:06:13,807
you're wearing some of
my dad's aftershave...
155
00:06:13,809 --> 00:06:15,909
Which burns. It burns bad.
156
00:06:15,911 --> 00:06:17,411
Hey, it roped in your mom.
157
00:06:17,413 --> 00:06:18,846
Not the goal here.
158
00:06:18,848 --> 00:06:20,481
Just... what's next on your list?
159
00:06:20,483 --> 00:06:22,316
Okay, item number three on the list...
160
00:06:22,318 --> 00:06:23,851
"Sit next to Nori on the bus."
161
00:06:23,853 --> 00:06:26,186
Okay, sitting. I can do that.
162
00:06:26,188 --> 00:06:28,222
I'll just go up to her
and say something like...
163
00:06:28,224 --> 00:06:29,890
"Hey, Nori, is this seat taken?"
164
00:06:29,892 --> 00:06:31,725
Load them up!
165
00:06:31,727 --> 00:06:35,095
That's weak, little bro.
This is Nori Sterling.
166
00:06:35,097 --> 00:06:39,066
You have to be smooth.
More Fresh Prince, less Urkel.
167
00:06:46,242 --> 00:06:47,841
A wave. That's good.
168
00:06:47,843 --> 00:06:49,510
- Now all you have to do is...
- Hey, Nori.
169
00:06:49,512 --> 00:06:51,745
Is this seat taken?
170
00:06:51,747 --> 00:06:55,249
No, go ahead.
171
00:06:55,251 --> 00:06:57,518
He stole my line.
172
00:06:57,520 --> 00:07:01,455
Looks like we've got... competition.
173
00:07:02,591 --> 00:07:04,525
Good way to think about it,
just like your ABC's.
174
00:07:04,527 --> 00:07:07,261
Airway, breathing, circulation.
175
00:07:07,263 --> 00:07:09,429
Level with me. Was it that bad?
176
00:07:09,431 --> 00:07:11,532
I mean, I would have done a little less
177
00:07:11,534 --> 00:07:14,234
on corporate tax loopholes,
but you do you man.
178
00:07:14,236 --> 00:07:15,903
So I'm gonna bring out a buddy of mine.
179
00:07:15,905 --> 00:07:18,238
This is, uh, Rescue Annie,
180
00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:20,874
and now I'm gonna show
you how to perform CPR.
181
00:07:20,876 --> 00:07:22,543
God, it's killing me.
182
00:07:22,545 --> 00:07:24,444
Where do I know this guy from?
Do you recognize him?
183
00:07:24,446 --> 00:07:26,561
I don't know.
Y'all all look the same to me.
184
00:07:26,616 --> 00:07:28,549
So for every 30 compressions...
185
00:07:28,551 --> 00:07:30,083
I do two breaths.
186
00:07:46,335 --> 00:07:47,968
Sarah!
187
00:07:55,344 --> 00:07:56,810
Holy crap.
188
00:07:56,812 --> 00:07:58,779
I know where I know this guy from.
189
00:08:06,747 --> 00:08:09,681
Named after French
physicist L�on Foucault,
190
00:08:09,683 --> 00:08:13,318
the pendulum is comprised
of a 240 pound ball
191
00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:15,120
held by a 40 foot cable.
192
00:08:15,122 --> 00:08:16,888
Powered by the rotation of the Earth...
193
00:08:16,890 --> 00:08:18,356
Don't worry, little bro.
194
00:08:18,358 --> 00:08:20,925
The bus was only one
small part of the plan.
195
00:08:20,927 --> 00:08:23,962
"Step four, stand out
and grab Nori's attention
196
00:08:23,964 --> 00:08:25,056
by making the class laugh."
197
00:08:25,198 --> 00:08:26,134
That's really gonna help?
198
00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:27,630
Women love funny dudes.
199
00:08:27,702 --> 00:08:30,068
Have you ever seen Steven
Wright's girlfriend?
200
00:08:30,070 --> 00:08:31,436
Schwing!
201
00:08:31,438 --> 00:08:33,438
Quiet, you two.
202
00:08:33,440 --> 00:08:34,940
Because of the Earth's rotation
203
00:08:34,975 --> 00:08:37,516
the pendulum knocks over one
of these pegs every 20 minutes.
204
00:08:37,611 --> 00:08:39,177
Now, I know what you're thinking,
205
00:08:39,179 --> 00:08:42,847
but it's science, not magic.
206
00:08:42,849 --> 00:08:44,535
- Yes.
- Could you work some magic?
207
00:08:44,618 --> 00:08:46,885
Make the rest of this lecture disappear?
208
00:08:46,900 --> 00:08:49,287
It's like he stole our playbook.
209
00:08:49,289 --> 00:08:50,076
Terrific.
210
00:08:50,091 --> 00:08:52,504
Looks like we got a regular
Steven Wright on our hands.
211
00:08:52,593 --> 00:08:55,226
Okay, everyone, follow me.
212
00:08:55,228 --> 00:08:56,955
- Yes?
- But I really want
213
00:08:56,964 --> 00:08:58,576
to see the pendulum knock down a peg.
214
00:08:58,665 --> 00:09:01,266
And I really want a job
that pays an actual salary.
215
00:09:01,268 --> 00:09:03,435
Follow me.
216
00:09:03,437 --> 00:09:05,637
Did you hear that?
I know how to impress Nori.
217
00:09:05,669 --> 00:09:06,968
Watch this.
218
00:09:06,970 --> 00:09:08,336
Hey, Nori!
219
00:09:08,338 --> 00:09:09,280
Check it out.
220
00:09:09,373 --> 00:09:11,973
I think the peg's about to fall.
221
00:09:22,019 --> 00:09:24,386
Uh-oh.
222
00:09:24,388 --> 00:09:26,021
Ow.
223
00:09:26,023 --> 00:09:28,089
Well, at least he got her attention.
224
00:09:33,597 --> 00:09:35,463
Hey, hey, hey, why'd you storm out?
225
00:09:35,465 --> 00:09:37,365
He was just about to break
out the shocky paddle things.
226
00:09:37,367 --> 00:09:39,234
That's the guy I caught
sleeping with Sarah.
227
00:09:39,236 --> 00:09:40,902
That's the guy that ruined my marriage.
228
00:09:40,904 --> 00:09:42,070
Him?
229
00:09:42,072 --> 00:09:43,572
Are you sure?
230
00:09:46,510 --> 00:09:49,878
Yeah, that's him. God, this is horrible.
231
00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:52,581
I don't want to have to see
that guy at drop off every day.
232
00:09:52,583 --> 00:09:55,150
Well, he's going to be there.
So like it or not,
233
00:09:55,152 --> 00:09:56,751
you're gonna have to confront him.
234
00:09:56,753 --> 00:09:58,286
Oh, you mean punch him in the face.
235
00:09:58,288 --> 00:10:00,355
No, I mean tell him
what he did was wrong.
236
00:10:00,357 --> 00:10:02,424
I don't know, I kind of like
your face-punching idea better.
237
00:10:02,426 --> 00:10:04,726
- That wasn't my idea.
- Don't be so humble.
238
00:10:04,728 --> 00:10:06,628
Look, all I'm saying is
just go up to the guy
239
00:10:06,630 --> 00:10:08,396
and tell him with words
240
00:10:08,398 --> 00:10:10,532
all the things you're feeling right now.
241
00:10:10,534 --> 00:10:12,100
The hurt, the anger, betrayal.
242
00:10:12,102 --> 00:10:14,069
Don't ignore it. Talk to him.
243
00:10:14,071 --> 00:10:17,038
Oh, that's good.
Yeah, get him to let his guard down.
244
00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:18,607
So I can punch him in the face.
245
00:10:20,477 --> 00:10:22,410
Morning, Dad. You're not dressed.
246
00:10:22,412 --> 00:10:24,045
I thought we were playing
tennis this morning.
247
00:10:24,047 --> 00:10:26,748
- My God, I totally forgot.
- No problem.
248
00:10:26,750 --> 00:10:29,184
I'll just grab some coffee
while you get ready.
249
00:10:29,186 --> 00:10:31,786
Um, no, I don't think
I'm going to play today.
250
00:10:31,788 --> 00:10:33,154
I don't really feel up to it.
251
00:10:33,156 --> 00:10:35,924
Are you still upset because you ran
into that horrible woman you hate?
252
00:10:35,926 --> 00:10:37,692
I think he got over it.
253
00:10:40,297 --> 00:10:42,063
Abby...
254
00:10:42,065 --> 00:10:43,832
you remember Kelly.
255
00:10:45,569 --> 00:10:48,536
Wow. Must have been some comeback.
256
00:10:49,264 --> 00:10:50,705
- Coffee?
- No, thanks.
257
00:10:50,707 --> 00:10:52,474
- I'm just gonna...
- Oh, you want...
258
00:10:52,476 --> 00:10:53,589
- That's okay.
- You sure?
259
00:10:53,644 --> 00:10:55,377
- Yep. No.
- But.
260
00:10:57,314 --> 00:10:59,848
- Dude, it's your lucky day.
- Lucky?
261
00:10:59,850 --> 00:11:02,250
Yeah, I fell in a pit,
sprained my wrist,
262
00:11:02,252 --> 00:11:04,085
and totally humiliated myself.
263
00:11:04,087 --> 00:11:07,589
And now you reap the benefits
of the sympathy card.
264
00:11:07,591 --> 00:11:09,457
Nobody is going to have sympathy for me.
265
00:11:09,459 --> 00:11:10,892
They're just gonna
give me a new nickname.
266
00:11:10,894 --> 00:11:13,928
Wristy... Falls-in-a-pit-guy...
267
00:11:13,930 --> 00:11:15,563
This school is rarely clever.
268
00:11:16,303 --> 00:11:17,365
Falls-in-a-pit-guy.
269
00:11:17,367 --> 00:11:19,401
- This is worse than "Chokey."
- No, no.
270
00:11:19,403 --> 00:11:22,137
I overheard Nori say she was
totally worried about you.
271
00:11:22,139 --> 00:11:23,058
Really?
272
00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:25,340
So I spoke to her and was able to parlay
273
00:11:25,342 --> 00:11:27,342
that worry into her saving you
a seat at the movie.
274
00:11:27,344 --> 00:11:29,210
Cool.
275
00:11:29,212 --> 00:11:32,013
- Thanks, Justin.
- You got it, Wristy.
276
00:11:35,552 --> 00:11:37,686
Hey. Where do you think you're going?
277
00:11:37,688 --> 00:11:39,487
Oh, hey, Alex.
278
00:11:39,489 --> 00:11:41,156
I was just heading to my car.
279
00:11:41,158 --> 00:11:43,024
You don't even know who I am, do you?
280
00:11:43,026 --> 00:11:44,793
Oh... I'm sorry.
281
00:11:44,795 --> 00:11:46,561
I thought you said your name was Alex.
282
00:11:46,563 --> 00:11:48,963
It is. I...
283
00:11:50,167 --> 00:11:52,701
Sorry, I thought... I had already
planned out something to say.
284
00:11:52,703 --> 00:11:55,403
I didn't think that you were
going to say what you did...
285
00:11:55,405 --> 00:11:57,238
Look, the point is
286
00:11:57,240 --> 00:12:00,909
you slept with my wife,
and this... is a confrontation.
287
00:12:00,911 --> 00:12:02,210
What?
288
00:12:02,212 --> 00:12:04,179
My wife was Sarah Riley.
289
00:12:06,016 --> 00:12:07,833
Oh, my God.
290
00:12:08,785 --> 00:12:10,385
I swear, I...
291
00:12:10,387 --> 00:12:11,786
I had no idea she was married.
292
00:12:11,788 --> 00:12:13,221
Once I found out, I felt horrible.
293
00:12:13,223 --> 00:12:14,489
Oh, you felt horrible?
294
00:12:14,491 --> 00:12:16,991
I know it's nothing compared
to what you went through.
295
00:12:16,993 --> 00:12:18,660
I destroyed your family,
296
00:12:18,662 --> 00:12:20,929
and I have to live with that
for the rest of my life.
297
00:12:20,931 --> 00:12:22,397
Oh, so you really didn't know, huh?
298
00:12:22,399 --> 00:12:24,132
I didn't.
299
00:12:24,134 --> 00:12:26,501
I know that doesn't fix things, but...
300
00:12:26,503 --> 00:12:28,269
I really am sorry.
301
00:12:28,271 --> 00:12:30,572
So if you...
302
00:12:30,574 --> 00:12:32,073
If you need to punch me in the face,
303
00:12:32,075 --> 00:12:34,209
punch me in the face.
304
00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:39,114
Well, see, now I don't wanna. I...
305
00:12:41,685 --> 00:12:44,152
Well, I guess this is goodbye.
306
00:12:44,154 --> 00:12:48,189
Um, yeah, or we could,
uh, maybe have breakfast.
307
00:12:48,191 --> 00:12:49,891
- Breakfast?
- Yeah, breakfast.
308
00:12:49,893 --> 00:12:51,493
You know, first meal of the day.
309
00:12:51,495 --> 00:12:53,094
Sometimes served with
orange juice or a mimosa,
310
00:12:53,096 --> 00:12:54,863
or in your case straight vodka.
311
00:12:56,233 --> 00:12:57,999
I just thought this was a...
312
00:12:58,001 --> 00:12:59,934
one night, no breakfast kind of thing.
313
00:12:59,936 --> 00:13:01,870
You know, wham-bam-no-Grand-Slam.
314
00:13:02,104 --> 00:13:04,305
So did I, but...
315
00:13:04,307 --> 00:13:07,075
This was a lot of fun. And I'm starving.
316
00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:09,711
I guess a little
breakfast couldn't hurt.
317
00:13:09,713 --> 00:13:11,546
Let's, uh, see what's nearby.
318
00:13:11,548 --> 00:13:14,883
Pull up nearby breakfast restaurants.
319
00:13:14,885 --> 00:13:16,551
Oh, Corky's looks good.
320
00:13:16,553 --> 00:13:19,788
Uh, no. I can't take you there.
321
00:13:19,790 --> 00:13:23,158
- Why, what's at Corky's?
- No one.
322
00:13:23,160 --> 00:13:25,193
- Do you have a girlfriend?
- No.
323
00:13:25,195 --> 00:13:27,929
Not a girlfriend. Someone I...
324
00:13:27,931 --> 00:13:29,397
like, probably shouldn't.
325
00:13:29,399 --> 00:13:30,865
It's silly.
326
00:13:30,867 --> 00:13:33,568
Are you kidding? This is great.
327
00:13:33,570 --> 00:13:36,805
This is the first time I've
genuinely been interested
328
00:13:36,807 --> 00:13:39,073
in you since we ran
into each other last night.
329
00:13:39,075 --> 00:13:41,810
Till now you were basically
a piece of exercise equipment.
330
00:13:41,812 --> 00:13:43,624
You're sick, you know that?
331
00:13:44,481 --> 00:13:47,248
This is getting my...
332
00:13:47,250 --> 00:13:48,983
competitive juices flowing.
333
00:13:48,985 --> 00:13:52,253
I'm gonna make you forget
all about this woman.
334
00:13:52,255 --> 00:13:54,389
Well...
335
00:13:54,391 --> 00:13:57,058
You've already made me
forget about breakfast.
336
00:13:57,060 --> 00:14:00,361
- Ow.
- What... what's wrong?
337
00:14:00,363 --> 00:14:02,397
An old injury.
338
00:14:02,399 --> 00:14:04,432
How's your wrist? Does it hurt?
339
00:14:04,434 --> 00:14:07,001
Nah, they gave me
extra strength Tylenol.
340
00:14:07,003 --> 00:14:08,336
The adult ones.
341
00:14:08,338 --> 00:14:09,938
You know, the kind that firemen take
342
00:14:09,940 --> 00:14:12,173
after they fall off a ladder.
343
00:14:12,175 --> 00:14:13,942
Alex, my man.
344
00:14:13,944 --> 00:14:16,077
- Glad to see you're okay.
- Hey, Phil.
345
00:14:16,079 --> 00:14:18,413
I gotta tell you,
when I saw you fall in that pit
346
00:14:18,415 --> 00:14:20,114
all I could think of were
the horrible nicknames
347
00:14:20,116 --> 00:14:21,683
people were going to call you.
348
00:14:21,685 --> 00:14:24,352
Sprainy... Wristopher...
349
00:14:25,911 --> 00:14:27,956
That one seems to be gathering steam.
350
00:14:27,958 --> 00:14:30,625
- Are you crying?
- Don't fall for it, Nori.
351
00:14:30,627 --> 00:14:32,861
He's fake crying so
you'll think he's a good guy.
352
00:14:32,863 --> 00:14:34,762
But he seems really upset.
353
00:14:34,764 --> 00:14:35,617
He's not upset.
354
00:14:35,632 --> 00:14:37,251
He's the president of the drama club,
355
00:14:37,334 --> 00:14:39,467
and he's always bragging about
having a commercial agent.
356
00:14:39,469 --> 00:14:41,703
I just booked a J.C. Penney spot.
357
00:14:41,705 --> 00:14:43,404
Welcome to the world famous
358
00:14:43,406 --> 00:14:46,040
Los Angeles Science and History Museum.
359
00:14:46,387 --> 00:14:47,876
Our journey begins
360
00:14:47,878 --> 00:14:50,011
- billions of years ago.
- Faker.
361
00:14:50,013 --> 00:14:52,313
- I am not, Wristopher.
- Shh.
362
00:14:52,315 --> 00:14:54,106
Wristopher?
That doesn't even make any sense.
363
00:14:54,151 --> 00:14:56,484
- It's a play on Christopher.
- But that's not even my name.
364
00:14:56,486 --> 00:14:59,387
If you want to talk so much,
you can do it by yourselves.
365
00:15:05,829 --> 00:15:09,497
She's gone.
You don't have to keep fake crying.
366
00:15:09,499 --> 00:15:11,499
My acting coach encourages me
367
00:15:11,501 --> 00:15:13,935
to access the memories
of my dead grandma.
368
00:15:16,072 --> 00:15:17,705
Here they come again.
369
00:15:20,744 --> 00:15:22,410
Alex.
370
00:15:22,412 --> 00:15:25,580
How'd your showdown go
with the... CPR guy?
371
00:15:25,582 --> 00:15:28,016
You're playing video games with?
372
00:15:28,018 --> 00:15:29,139
Hey, Jasmine's dad.
373
00:15:29,219 --> 00:15:32,320
Can I just say,
you have a beautiful home.
374
00:15:32,322 --> 00:15:33,409
Isn't he the sweetest?
375
00:15:33,457 --> 00:15:36,291
- Here's a sweet dunk on you.
- No, come on, no.
376
00:15:36,293 --> 00:15:37,559
- Oh.
- Oh, shut up.
377
00:15:37,561 --> 00:15:38,927
How are you so good at this?
378
00:15:44,325 --> 00:15:47,155
What the hell is that
man doing in my house?
379
00:15:47,190 --> 00:15:48,560
We actually have a lot in common.
380
00:15:48,562 --> 00:15:50,095
Yeah, you both slept with your wife.
381
00:15:50,097 --> 00:15:51,897
Yeah, and he feels terrible about it.
382
00:15:51,899 --> 00:15:53,165
You know he hasn't had
a good night's sleep
383
00:15:53,167 --> 00:15:54,800
since it happened.
384
00:15:54,802 --> 00:15:57,469
So that's it,
now you're just cool with him?
385
00:15:57,471 --> 00:15:59,004
I feel like you're
not dealing with this.
386
00:15:59,006 --> 00:16:00,305
Maybe I don't have to deal with it.
387
00:16:00,307 --> 00:16:01,648
Maybe we can just be friends.
388
00:16:01,743 --> 00:16:03,609
This isn't healthy man.
389
00:16:05,188 --> 00:16:06,211
What is that smell?
390
00:16:06,635 --> 00:16:07,613
Ben brought a banana bread over.
391
00:16:07,615 --> 00:16:09,448
He baked it himself.
392
00:16:14,223 --> 00:16:17,523
Okay, if I have a slice,
that does not mean I condone this.
393
00:16:17,525 --> 00:16:19,224
Oh, no, you have to have a slice.
394
00:16:19,226 --> 00:16:20,592
It is stupid good.
395
00:16:20,594 --> 00:16:22,795
I do love me some banana bread.
396
00:16:26,100 --> 00:16:28,500
Hey, Nori. You okay?
397
00:16:28,502 --> 00:16:31,537
What is it about field trips
that makes all the boys go bonkers?
398
00:16:31,539 --> 00:16:33,472
I mean, I expected this from other guys
399
00:16:33,474 --> 00:16:35,040
but not Alex.
400
00:16:35,042 --> 00:16:37,142
Don't blame Alex. It's all my fault.
401
00:16:37,144 --> 00:16:39,411
Ever since I gave him
the mint at the dance,
402
00:16:39,413 --> 00:16:41,647
you know, the one he choked on
and spat into your mouth.
403
00:16:41,649 --> 00:16:43,282
Yeah, I remember.
404
00:16:43,284 --> 00:16:44,950
Well, ever since the Mint-cident,
405
00:16:44,952 --> 00:16:46,752
coined that term myself,
406
00:16:46,754 --> 00:16:48,520
I've trying to make up for it
by playing matchmaker.
407
00:16:48,522 --> 00:16:51,323
And when we saw you and Phil Ricozzi
sitting together on the bus...
408
00:16:51,325 --> 00:16:52,958
Phil Ricozzi?
409
00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:54,860
I wouldn't be into that guy
in a million years.
410
00:16:54,862 --> 00:16:56,428
Have you seen his Plumber King spot?
411
00:16:56,430 --> 00:16:58,363
Yeah, with that stupid slogan.
412
00:16:58,365 --> 00:17:00,933
"Nothing beats a Royal Flush."
413
00:17:03,370 --> 00:17:05,404
Oh, royal flush.
414
00:17:05,406 --> 00:17:06,738
I just got that.
415
00:17:06,740 --> 00:17:08,974
- But still Phil sucked.
- Agreed.
416
00:17:11,111 --> 00:17:13,478
Mmm, how's it so moist
all the way through?
417
00:17:13,480 --> 00:17:15,948
You know I can give you the recipe.
418
00:17:15,950 --> 00:17:17,583
- Nah, I don't want it.
- Oh, my God.
419
00:17:17,585 --> 00:17:19,042
You are killing me.
420
00:17:19,120 --> 00:17:21,019
You haven't missed any three
pointers this whole quarter.
421
00:17:21,021 --> 00:17:22,151
How are you so good at this?
422
00:17:22,156 --> 00:17:24,056
My players, you know,
they get to bed early.
423
00:17:24,058 --> 00:17:24,940
They eat right.
424
00:17:25,026 --> 00:17:27,860
They are not allowed in that nightclub
from Grand Theft Auto.
425
00:17:28,542 --> 00:17:30,596
Oh, and then before the
game starts I just press
426
00:17:30,598 --> 00:17:33,065
X, X, square, down, X,
circle, circle, circle.
427
00:17:34,368 --> 00:17:36,468
Wait. You use a cheat code?
428
00:17:36,470 --> 00:17:37,970
It's silly, I know.
429
00:17:38,932 --> 00:17:39,838
Wait, so you were cheating?
430
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:43,075
Oh, come on, if the game lets you do it,
it's not really cheating, right?
431
00:17:44,345 --> 00:17:46,011
So let me get this straight.
432
00:17:46,013 --> 00:17:48,680
- You come into my house...
- Technically my house.
433
00:17:48,682 --> 00:17:51,183
And without any consideration
for anyone else's feelings,
434
00:17:51,185 --> 00:17:52,985
just because you felt like it,
you cheated?
435
00:17:52,987 --> 00:17:55,520
Okay, I think I can see
where this is going.
436
00:17:55,522 --> 00:17:57,189
Cheater!
437
00:17:58,225 --> 00:18:00,492
I think he's coming to.
438
00:18:02,529 --> 00:18:03,929
Are you okay, man?
439
00:18:08,435 --> 00:18:09,835
What happened?
440
00:18:09,837 --> 00:18:11,570
Well you punched Ben in the face,
441
00:18:11,572 --> 00:18:13,372
and then you screamed, "My wrist!"
442
00:18:13,374 --> 00:18:15,974
Then you fainted like a
lady in a Jane Austen novel.
443
00:18:15,976 --> 00:18:17,709
Hey, let me take a look at it,
all right?
444
00:18:17,711 --> 00:18:19,278
Sorry, man, I don't know what happened.
445
00:18:19,280 --> 00:18:21,914
I do. You got a lot
of repressed aggression
446
00:18:21,916 --> 00:18:23,582
against the guy who
slept with your wife,
447
00:18:23,584 --> 00:18:25,450
and I think you needed to get it out.
448
00:18:25,452 --> 00:18:26,919
I did.
449
00:18:26,921 --> 00:18:28,407
I suddenly feel so much better.
450
00:18:28,689 --> 00:18:30,489
Except for my wrist.
451
00:18:30,491 --> 00:18:32,971
- How's your jaw?
- It's fine.
452
00:18:33,257 --> 00:18:35,360
You're probably still in shock.
453
00:18:35,362 --> 00:18:36,895
Yeah, that's probably it.
454
00:18:36,897 --> 00:18:38,230
Yeah.
455
00:18:38,232 --> 00:18:40,098
Look, you were right, Darryl.
456
00:18:40,100 --> 00:18:41,900
Ever since the divorce,
I've all these feelings
457
00:18:41,902 --> 00:18:43,902
of anger and hurt just bottled up.
458
00:18:43,904 --> 00:18:46,772
It all came out in one ferocious punch
like I was a young Mike Tyson.
459
00:18:46,774 --> 00:18:48,373
Well, how young are we talking here?
460
00:18:48,375 --> 00:18:51,343
- Like age 4?
- I'm having a moment.
461
00:18:51,345 --> 00:18:54,680
Ben, I appreciate you
helping me get to this point,
462
00:18:54,682 --> 00:18:56,782
but I don't think we should be friends.
463
00:18:57,690 --> 00:18:59,017
Totally get it, man.
464
00:19:00,002 --> 00:19:01,279
We had a good run.
465
00:19:05,626 --> 00:19:07,526
I have something else
I want to say to that guy.
466
00:19:07,528 --> 00:19:09,294
You want to get that
banana bread recipe?
467
00:19:09,296 --> 00:19:12,397
- Just so moist.
- So moist.
468
00:19:12,399 --> 00:19:13,865
So let me get this straight.
469
00:19:13,867 --> 00:19:15,300
You could date any of these women.
470
00:19:15,302 --> 00:19:17,369
Or these women.
471
00:19:17,371 --> 00:19:18,971
Or this guy.
472
00:19:18,973 --> 00:19:20,939
How did he sneak in there?
473
00:19:20,941 --> 00:19:24,376
But instead you choose someone
you've hated for 20 years.
474
00:19:24,378 --> 00:19:27,412
Hm. I don't know what to tell you.
475
00:19:27,414 --> 00:19:29,948
The heart wants what the heart...
476
00:19:29,950 --> 00:19:32,084
is incredibly annoyed by.
477
00:19:32,086 --> 00:19:34,252
So, you and Kelly,
are you guys a thing now?
478
00:19:34,254 --> 00:19:37,222
Don't know.
But I like that I like someone.
479
00:19:37,224 --> 00:19:40,292
And I like that it's not Eleanor.
480
00:19:40,294 --> 00:19:41,927
Me too.
481
00:19:44,852 --> 00:19:46,064
You know, this guy's kinda cute.
482
00:19:47,735 --> 00:19:50,936
Hi, I'm Brad,
but the ladies call me rad.
483
00:19:50,938 --> 00:19:53,372
Nope.
484
00:19:53,374 --> 00:19:56,675
Sometimes you find love
in unexpected places.
485
00:19:56,677 --> 00:19:59,478
But sometimes you just
have to let it find you.
486
00:20:01,022 --> 00:20:03,181
Hey, I'm going to the post office.
I can take that for you if you want.
487
00:20:03,183 --> 00:20:05,117
Oh, no, thanks,
Susan's coming by to pick it up.
488
00:20:05,119 --> 00:20:07,152
- Susan?
- What?
489
00:20:07,154 --> 00:20:09,121
I'm just sending a box.
490
00:20:09,123 --> 00:20:11,957
To your parents who
live five miles away?
491
00:20:11,959 --> 00:20:14,574
- And with nothing in it?
- You're right.
492
00:20:14,609 --> 00:20:16,661
I should probably throw
some laundry in there, huh?
493
00:20:16,663 --> 00:20:18,229
I'm proud of you, buddy.
494
00:20:20,034 --> 00:20:23,902
Other times, you're just happy
to find out you're still in the game.
495
00:20:25,616 --> 00:20:27,072
Today was a disaster.
496
00:20:27,074 --> 00:20:30,842
Except for one huge piece
of information I uncovered.
497
00:20:30,844 --> 00:20:33,211
Nori doesn't like Phil Ricozzi.
498
00:20:33,213 --> 00:20:35,414
She doesn't? God, that's great.
499
00:20:35,416 --> 00:20:37,516
That's one huge rival eliminated.
500
00:20:37,518 --> 00:20:41,153
Yeah, now there's no one left
standing in your way, little bro.
501
00:20:41,155 --> 00:20:42,521
No one at all.
502
00:20:54,514 --> 00:20:56,268
Oh, crap.
503
00:20:57,269 --> 00:20:59,269
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
37134
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.