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Aah!
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D'oh!
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Is she gonna be okay, Doc?
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She's just fine.
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- And here's the baby.
- Oh...
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I know how to hold one of these.
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D'oh!
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- Sync and corrections by ByDem -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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You're watching The Learning Network,
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00:00:53,334 --> 00:00:54,466
where minds grow.
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Stay tuned for...
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Apocalypse Week,
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Ebola Meteor,
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Nukes of Hazard,
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Jesus Christ Superstorm,
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But first... Nostradamus: The
man who saw the future.
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The following film, made in 1982,
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was thought to be lost forever.
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Actually, it was misplaced in a box
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for the comedy Doctor Detroit.
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But its predictions are
more terrifying than ever.
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Hello, I'm Orson... Welles,
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director of Citizen Kane...
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Boring.
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as well as the lower left-hand square
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on Hollywood Squares.
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Ooh, right next to Ruth Buzzi.
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In 1555, the prophet Nostradamus
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foretold a terrifying series
of predictions,
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all of which came to pass.
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First, his own death. Second,
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large wars in Europe,
similar to the large wars
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he observed in Europe.
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And the breakup of Fleetwood Mac.
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But Nostradamus's
final quatrain contained
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one more prediction yet to come:
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that shortly after the
Antichrist becomes president...
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A Flaming mushroom
spreads across the sky.
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This champagne is terrible.
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It tastes like dryer sheets.
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But what does said mushroom signify?
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Nothing less than World War III.
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Ugh, who'd fall for this malarkey?
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Smithers, I'm scared.
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Release the comforting hounds.
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Oh, excellent. Now, make them into rugs.
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Anyone left alive will surely
find themselves envying...
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Who? Who could we possibly envy?
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- the dead.
- Aah!
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Smithers, the end is nigh,
and we must prepare.
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Round up this town's greatest minds.
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- Should I order pizza?
- Uh-huh.
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One large cheese, double-cut.
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Attention, fellow members
_
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of the Springfield chapter of Mensa.
_
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Mr. Burns has called us here
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to solve an unknown problem
of global importance.
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But first, Tri-Ominoes!
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I say we write and solve
our own acrostics.
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Yes, after we recite all the words
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in the Declaration of Independence
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in alphabetical order.
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A, A, A, A, A, A.
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Abdicated. Abolish. Abolishing.
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Absolute. Absolved.
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Silence, you thinkertons.
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I summoned you here because
the world is about to end.
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No, it isn't. What are you afraid of?
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Global warming?
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A.I.? Some sort of plague?
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As smarty-pantalones,
I am asking you to help with
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the Montgomery Burns Doomsday Ark.
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This space vehicle will lead
humanity's best and brightest
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to a better life under my stern rule.
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Oh, gee heavens.
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Will there be someone for
your more personal needs?
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Concubines. Many concubines.
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I'll work my way in.
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I need you to tell me who is worthy
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of surviving the apocalypse with me.
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I only want the sharpest razors
in this town's Halloween candy.
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Oh, don't worry, Mr. Burns,
this is what Mensa does best...
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make everyone else feel stupid.
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The only word in English
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with three consecutive
double letters is...
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- Oh, um...
- Um...
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Um, "gooseberry."
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No, "coffee." Coffee-oo.
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- Uh, balloon-an-ing.
- Bookkeeper.
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- Damn it.
- Ha!
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It's simple. All we need to do is
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give everyone in town an IQ test.
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The highest scores get on the ark...
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Mensa members grandfathered in.
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Sounds good to me.
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Grandfathered!
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Not so fast. Flavin.
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Being intelligent people,
I am quite sure
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that you will take this well.
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IQs are meaningless.
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Heresy!
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I have the ultimate test
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that measures something
far more significant:
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your overall worth as a human.
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Impossible.
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Intelligence is the only quotient
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that tells you how important you are.
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Ask any of us who did well on
a test we took when we were six.
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Well, you may be the brightest,
but you are not the best.
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00:05:03,430 --> 00:05:06,932
Your worthiness as a human being
is best measured, people,
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00:05:06,968 --> 00:05:10,903
by the Personal Value Quotient.
That's P.V.Q.
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Oh! Ow! All right,
enough with the pelting
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and the bonking
and the compass in my neck.
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Garvik. In order to defuse
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your obvious hostilities,
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I will make my presentation
entertaining, all right?
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With a one, and a two, and a 3.14159.
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Forgive me if it seems like
I'm attacking,
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but I find the old IQ test
badly lacking.
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If you want to find out
just what someone can do,
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you need to learn that subject's P.V.Q.
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♪ It tests for ♪
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♪ Sympathy and empathy ♪
♪ and group collaboration ♪
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♪ Artistry and neatness ♪
♪ and complex socialization ♪
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♪ And every single aspect ♪
♪ of a personality ♪
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♪ Hey, the P.V.Q. ♪
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♪ Is A.O.K. with me ♪
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00:06:04,725 --> 00:06:07,726
♪ It tests for sarcasm and prudence ♪
129
00:06:07,795 --> 00:06:09,896
♪ Not if you're Isaac Newton ♪
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00:06:09,964 --> 00:06:11,430
♪ Confidence, ambition ♪
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♪ And the teams for whom ♪
♪ you're rootin' ♪
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♪ So it's all the little foibles ♪
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♪ That can make a person whole ♪
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♪ Trust the P.V.Q. ♪
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♪ The yardstick for the soul ♪
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♪ Now, people, you're all geniuses ♪
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- Oh, please...
- My, my, well, thank you.
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♪ You can see this is no lark ♪
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♪ Emotional intelligence ♪
♪ is needed for the ark ♪
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00:06:39,593 --> 00:06:41,326
- Uh-huh.
- Hmm...
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♪ You mean earnestness and ego ♪
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♪ And if they make a mean burrito ♪
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♪ And the social grace to know ♪
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♪ When not to wear a Speedo ♪
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♪ Every trait that integrates ♪
♪ a winning personality ♪
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♪ Yes, the P.V.Q. ♪
_
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♪ Is what we'll do to find out who ♪
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♪ Will see us through ♪
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♪ Yes, the P.V.Q. ♪
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♪ Is A.O.K. ♪
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♪ With me... ♪
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Oivik!
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Anyone have a song in rebuttal?
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♪ You got to have hear... ♪
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Oh, balderdash.
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We're going with this man's test.
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- Oh, wonderful.
- To determine who is worthy
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of a seat on my ark.
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Uh, but, sir, how do we
get everyone in town
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to take a test without
telling them what it's about?
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00:07:35,610 --> 00:07:36,884
_
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Mandatory test.
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Mandatory test!
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Mandatory for everyone
not ringing a bell.
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What's the point of this test again?
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The way I look at it, the more things
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secret corporations know
about us, the better, huh?
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I like when drones show up
bringing me things
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I needed but didn't know.
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Hmm.
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Wow, I am out of deodorant.
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We all knew.
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Remove all stray marks.
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Number two pencil only.
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And for God's sake, relax!
_
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This question asks about
the price of underwear,
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as if I were some landed aristocrat.
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Hey, can I copy off you?
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Be my guest.
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00:08:20,060 --> 00:08:23,795
"Day is to night as early is to..."
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Late. Booyah!
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Booyah!
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Booyah!
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The one test I don't bring my earmuffs.
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The results are in.
_
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00:08:41,915 --> 00:08:43,582
The newest and most accurate measure
_
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00:08:43,650 --> 00:08:46,385
of our intelligence on a
scale from one to 500...
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00:08:46,453 --> 00:08:48,388
500 being best.
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- Boring.
- Don't shut it off.
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I need my score.
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00:08:54,562 --> 00:08:56,195
Thank you.
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00:08:56,264 --> 00:08:58,730
Now we'll run everyone's scores
past the screen really fast,
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00:08:58,799 --> 00:09:00,399
from best to worst,
trusting that you'll pause
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00:09:00,467 --> 00:09:02,368
at only your name.
195
00:09:03,638 --> 00:09:05,971
Pause it!
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00:09:06,039 --> 00:09:09,107
475, my sweet spot. Excellent.
197
00:09:09,177 --> 00:09:10,777
But room to improve.
198
00:09:12,514 --> 00:09:16,182
What?! I am one below Ralph? Ralph?
199
00:09:16,216 --> 00:09:18,884
Honey, it doesn't mean
Ralph's smarter than you.
200
00:09:18,919 --> 00:09:22,522
It just means he's
a more valuable person.
201
00:09:22,557 --> 00:09:25,091
- Ralph?
- Keep scrolling.
202
00:09:26,161 --> 00:09:28,594
Ooh, 311.
203
00:09:28,663 --> 00:09:31,230
Above average, but not
enough to make people mad.
204
00:09:31,298 --> 00:09:34,700
And, it's the number you call
to complain about potholes.
205
00:09:34,769 --> 00:09:38,604
Ooh. "H. Simpson: 265."
206
00:09:38,673 --> 00:09:40,306
Exactly the number of days in a year.
207
00:09:41,842 --> 00:09:43,809
Well, that's good.
Let's change the channel.
208
00:09:43,878 --> 00:09:45,378
But we don't know your score.
209
00:09:45,413 --> 00:09:47,779
Like I said, that's good.
210
00:09:47,816 --> 00:09:51,017
Hmm, not there. Not there. Not there.
211
00:10:00,928 --> 00:10:03,162
I don't need any test.
212
00:10:03,230 --> 00:10:05,030
I'm street-smart.
213
00:10:06,301 --> 00:10:07,767
Haw-haw!
214
00:10:09,274 --> 00:10:13,005
I refuse to accept that
my little guy has no future.
215
00:10:13,005 --> 00:10:15,422
He can learn how to
put in adding machine tape.
216
00:10:15,422 --> 00:10:17,188
That's how I got through the Depression,
217
00:10:17,224 --> 00:10:19,658
and letting the FBI know
which bugle boys
218
00:10:19,726 --> 00:10:21,692
were about to turn boogie-woogie.
219
00:10:21,761 --> 00:10:23,562
We're not giving up on Bart.
220
00:10:23,629 --> 00:10:25,429
And I'm not giving up on you, Homer.
221
00:10:25,499 --> 00:10:27,499
What, you're still trying? In what way?
222
00:10:27,533 --> 00:10:30,302
My will is 38 pages
of me yelling at you.
223
00:10:30,336 --> 00:10:32,037
Ooh, I'm in the will.
224
00:10:35,442 --> 00:10:38,009
Charles. Listen to me, Charles.
225
00:10:38,077 --> 00:10:39,711
Not now, Satan.
226
00:10:39,779 --> 00:10:42,013
I'm not Satan, I'm Orson Welles.
227
00:10:42,048 --> 00:10:45,149
Satan would sell wine before its time.
228
00:10:45,219 --> 00:10:48,820
Yes. Now, have you taken
my warning seriously?
229
00:10:48,889 --> 00:10:50,822
Oh, but I did.
I've already started the ark.
230
00:10:50,890 --> 00:10:52,389
Very good. Now I must go.
231
00:10:52,459 --> 00:10:54,692
God commissioned me to direct a rainbow,
232
00:10:54,761 --> 00:10:56,894
and I've spent half my budget on indigo.
233
00:10:56,963 --> 00:10:59,730
The only answer is to play "red" myself.
234
00:10:59,799 --> 00:11:01,486
Smithers.
235
00:11:01,537 --> 00:11:03,534
Speed up production on the ark.
Put everyone on it.
236
00:11:03,604 --> 00:11:06,104
Ply them with all the rum
and salt it takes.
237
00:11:12,312 --> 00:11:15,618
Eh, there's no nap like a scaffold nap.
238
00:11:17,784 --> 00:11:19,583
Hey, what do you think
we're building, anyway?
239
00:11:19,620 --> 00:11:21,753
I'm betting it's a new
Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
240
00:11:21,822 --> 00:11:23,654
Maybe this one will keep somebody out.
241
00:11:25,057 --> 00:11:27,024
How can Ralph score higher than me?
242
00:11:27,059 --> 00:11:29,193
That's-that's just wrong.
243
00:11:29,263 --> 00:11:31,962
But all my self-esteem comes from tests.
244
00:11:32,032 --> 00:11:35,700
Should I really be pulling
on this string?
245
00:11:35,769 --> 00:11:37,601
I am not worse than Ralph!
246
00:11:39,773 --> 00:11:42,234
- Hi, Ralph.
- Hi, Ralph.
247
00:11:42,469 --> 00:11:44,075
- Hi, Ralph.
- Hi, Ralph.
248
00:11:44,144 --> 00:11:46,912
I miss the string through my ears.
249
00:11:48,514 --> 00:11:49,614
All right, Lisa.
250
00:11:49,682 --> 00:11:52,082
Watch, do not judge.
251
00:11:53,153 --> 00:11:55,287
What makes him superior?
_
252
00:11:56,289 --> 00:11:59,591
Whee!
253
00:11:59,625 --> 00:12:01,259
I'm okay.
254
00:12:03,529 --> 00:12:05,529
You have reached the Wiggum residence.
255
00:12:05,566 --> 00:12:08,299
If Ralph is stuck in
something, press one.
256
00:12:08,368 --> 00:12:11,068
If something is stuck in
Ralph, press two.
257
00:12:11,138 --> 00:12:14,639
If this is Ralph, Daddy
is not in the phone.
258
00:12:14,707 --> 00:12:17,609
Do not open the phone looking for me.
259
00:12:17,677 --> 00:12:18,909
What are you doing?
260
00:12:18,946 --> 00:12:20,144
The only thing I'm good at.
261
00:12:20,213 --> 00:12:21,245
Nothing.
262
00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:22,581
That tears it.
263
00:12:22,615 --> 00:12:24,349
We're going to see Professor Frink,
264
00:12:24,384 --> 00:12:27,284
and find out exactly
what happened on that test.
265
00:12:27,354 --> 00:12:28,687
Got a little present for you, Bart.
266
00:12:28,754 --> 00:12:32,123
It's called The Bible For The Slow. Mm?
267
00:12:32,192 --> 00:12:33,524
He's not going to take it.
_
268
00:12:33,559 --> 00:12:35,360
Okily-dokily.
269
00:12:35,394 --> 00:12:38,864
Professor Frink, your stupid
test ruined my son's life.
270
00:12:38,932 --> 00:12:40,831
Hey, that test is like a son to me.
271
00:12:40,868 --> 00:12:42,801
I raised it from a quiz.
272
00:12:42,870 --> 00:12:44,501
I've known my son since he was born,
273
00:12:44,571 --> 00:12:46,937
and he's not anywhere near as stupid
274
00:12:47,006 --> 00:12:48,840
as your stupid test says he is.
275
00:12:48,908 --> 00:12:53,043
And if you think so,
you're stupid, stupid, stupid!
276
00:12:53,113 --> 00:12:54,678
Wow, Marge.
277
00:12:54,748 --> 00:12:56,881
You really love Bart.
278
00:12:56,950 --> 00:12:59,283
All right, all right, let me recheck it.
279
00:12:59,352 --> 00:13:01,119
Uh, rechecking, rechecking.
280
00:13:01,187 --> 00:13:02,486
Put-upon sigh.
281
00:13:02,556 --> 00:13:03,621
Oivik.
282
00:13:03,657 --> 00:13:05,789
Rechecking... ah, here we are.
283
00:13:05,859 --> 00:13:07,158
Uh, Simpson, B.
284
00:13:07,193 --> 00:13:10,828
That's not a "B."
285
00:13:10,898 --> 00:13:12,330
Well, yes, it is, you see, the two...
286
00:13:12,399 --> 00:13:13,932
oh, my garvik!
287
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:15,966
There was a mistake. Well, your son
288
00:13:16,036 --> 00:13:17,869
has above-average intelligence.
289
00:13:17,937 --> 00:13:19,203
You did it, boy.
290
00:13:19,273 --> 00:13:20,504
No, that just looks like a "B."
291
00:13:20,573 --> 00:13:23,008
The real unfortunate is H. Simpson.
292
00:13:23,076 --> 00:13:24,975
I mean, what a clod!
293
00:13:25,044 --> 00:13:28,113
Worst handwriting and brain in town.
294
00:13:28,181 --> 00:13:29,114
- D'oh!
- Hey!
295
00:13:29,149 --> 00:13:30,514
I'm H. Simpson.
296
00:13:30,583 --> 00:13:32,250
Oh, well, it's very nice to meet you.
297
00:13:32,318 --> 00:13:33,485
Would you like some water?
298
00:13:33,552 --> 00:13:34,519
- Smartwater?
- No.
299
00:13:36,897 --> 00:13:38,462
- Homie, aren't you coming?
- Bye-bye.
300
00:13:38,499 --> 00:13:41,590
I can't. I'll be a laughing
stock when everyone finds out
301
00:13:41,590 --> 00:13:43,222
I'm the stupidest man in town.
302
00:13:43,292 --> 00:13:44,457
How are they gonna find out?
303
00:13:44,527 --> 00:13:45,993
I just tweeted it.
304
00:13:46,062 --> 00:13:48,928
Marge, you have to get ahead
of these stories.
305
00:13:48,952 --> 00:13:53,068
_
306
00:13:53,068 --> 00:13:55,536
I'm sorry, sir, you belong here.
307
00:13:55,604 --> 00:13:57,538
Oh! Oh.
_
308
00:13:57,832 --> 00:14:00,086
_
309
00:14:00,086 --> 00:14:02,946
_
310
00:14:03,446 --> 00:14:04,677
Look thou be true.
_
311
00:14:04,746 --> 00:14:06,212
Do not give dalliance.
312
00:14:06,248 --> 00:14:08,349
Too much of the rein.
313
00:14:10,552 --> 00:14:13,153
Why does Oscar skate in his trash can?
_
314
00:14:13,221 --> 00:14:14,488
It makes no sense!
315
00:14:16,759 --> 00:14:18,558
I'll cheer up here.
_
316
00:14:18,582 --> 00:14:19,628
_
317
00:14:19,628 --> 00:14:21,995
One "stupid," please?
318
00:14:22,063 --> 00:14:23,831
Okay, you gave me $40.
319
00:14:23,899 --> 00:14:25,231
Here's two dollars back.
320
00:14:25,301 --> 00:14:27,267
Unless you want splash insurance.
321
00:14:27,302 --> 00:14:29,068
- How much is that?
- Another ten.
322
00:14:29,105 --> 00:14:30,269
Uh, here's $20.
323
00:14:30,338 --> 00:14:32,206
And two more for you.
324
00:14:37,548 --> 00:14:39,683
Insurance doesn't cover
entryway splashes.
325
00:14:39,683 --> 00:14:41,196
D'oh!
326
00:14:41,196 --> 00:14:43,917
Hey, Homer, uh, we was watching
Jeopardy!, but, uh,
327
00:14:43,985 --> 00:14:46,953
tell you what, we'll just talk
about shapes and colors now.
328
00:14:47,023 --> 00:14:49,188
I like blue rectangles.
329
00:14:49,258 --> 00:14:51,024
Rectangles. You know, Homer.
330
00:14:51,092 --> 00:14:53,293
The ones with four sides.
331
00:14:53,328 --> 00:14:54,894
Listen, you.
332
00:14:54,963 --> 00:14:57,730
I've known my shapes since I was 16!
333
00:14:57,799 --> 00:15:00,768
Put him down, Homer,
and I'll give you a cookie.
334
00:15:00,836 --> 00:15:02,469
That's a coaster.
335
00:15:02,538 --> 00:15:04,104
Ooh! Dummy's wising up.
336
00:15:04,173 --> 00:15:06,139
I'll take the cookie.
337
00:15:06,207 --> 00:15:10,144
I never thought I'd say this,
but I'm too depressed for Moe's.
338
00:15:16,451 --> 00:15:17,650
Heya, Homer.
339
00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:20,888
I'm sorry. I know I'm taking up
too much of the bed.
340
00:15:20,956 --> 00:15:22,822
Oh, sweetie.
341
00:15:22,892 --> 00:15:26,125
What the entire world thinks
doesn't affect how I see you.
342
00:15:26,195 --> 00:15:27,961
Well, how do you see me?
343
00:15:28,029 --> 00:15:31,731
The hair and body
of a dashing Friar Tuck.
344
00:15:31,801 --> 00:15:34,735
Ooh.
345
00:15:34,803 --> 00:15:36,336
But what about my brains?
346
00:15:36,404 --> 00:15:38,739
My favorite character
in The Wizard of Oz
347
00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:41,707
was always the Scarecrow.
348
00:15:41,777 --> 00:15:43,342
I knew it. Thanks to that test,
349
00:15:43,412 --> 00:15:45,278
you see me as stupid first
and Homer third.
350
00:15:45,346 --> 00:15:46,647
I mean, second.
351
00:15:46,682 --> 00:15:47,713
I know second.
352
00:15:47,783 --> 00:15:48,981
I won't let you give up.
353
00:15:49,051 --> 00:15:51,217
We're going to start improving you.
354
00:15:51,253 --> 00:15:53,187
Oh, Marge. No one ever did
anything useful
355
00:15:53,254 --> 00:15:54,822
after the age of 39.
356
00:15:54,889 --> 00:15:56,657
George W. Bush sobered up.
357
00:15:56,692 --> 00:15:58,158
And became president.
358
00:15:58,226 --> 00:15:59,759
Too huge mistakes.
359
00:15:59,828 --> 00:16:01,461
Homie, this whole mix-up happened
360
00:16:01,529 --> 00:16:03,596
because of your sloppy handwriting.
361
00:16:03,666 --> 00:16:06,466
We'll start with that,
improving your handwriting.
362
00:16:06,534 --> 00:16:10,269
Right now, my hand just wants
to crawl in my pocket and cry.
363
00:16:10,339 --> 00:16:13,506
Now this hand is jealous.
364
00:16:13,542 --> 00:16:14,875
Mwah.
365
00:16:14,943 --> 00:16:16,643
I know where this is going.
366
00:16:16,711 --> 00:16:20,514
Um, I do, too, but you say it first.
367
00:16:20,582 --> 00:16:22,115
Snuggling.
368
00:16:22,183 --> 00:16:23,649
Ooh.
369
00:16:25,620 --> 00:16:27,187
_
370
00:16:27,222 --> 00:16:30,657
What is his secret? What is his secret?!
371
00:16:30,725 --> 00:16:32,893
I'm going to Dizzyland.
372
00:16:32,927 --> 00:16:37,097
_
373
00:16:40,402 --> 00:16:42,503
Want to see me do a cartwheel?
374
00:16:42,571 --> 00:16:44,403
- No! No, no, no!
- Good point.
375
00:16:44,472 --> 00:16:47,240
On the other hand, whee!
376
00:16:48,977 --> 00:16:51,010
Don't worry, Lou,
I've seen that in cartoons.
377
00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:54,014
Swee'Pea, Mr. Magoo, they were fine.
378
00:16:54,082 --> 00:16:55,581
What about Sylvester the Cat?
379
00:16:55,650 --> 00:16:57,817
Never be a cat in a cartoon, Lou.
380
00:16:57,852 --> 00:16:59,019
Never.
381
00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:07,426
The beam must have
a fulcrum I can move to
382
00:17:07,496 --> 00:17:08,595
that would stabilize it.
383
00:17:08,663 --> 00:17:10,797
Think, Lisa, think.
384
00:17:14,236 --> 00:17:15,536
Oh!
385
00:17:20,075 --> 00:17:22,041
Two for two.
386
00:17:23,979 --> 00:17:27,346
Young man, didn't I tell you
to sit and stay in that house?
387
00:17:27,415 --> 00:17:29,348
I thought you were talking to the dog.
388
00:17:29,417 --> 00:17:30,784
We don't have a dog.
389
00:17:30,853 --> 00:17:32,719
Then what's been pooping in my bedroom?
390
00:17:32,755 --> 00:17:36,789
Professor, how on Earth did he
get a higher score than me?
391
00:17:36,858 --> 00:17:40,661
Okay, Lisa, I am going
to give you ten more points
392
00:17:40,729 --> 00:17:43,063
for one of the most important
skills of all:
393
00:17:43,132 --> 00:17:46,700
discovering huge flaws in
my test without telling anyone.
394
00:17:48,636 --> 00:17:51,137
You mean, after all this,
after all I've gone through,
395
00:17:51,207 --> 00:17:54,907
you're just gonna fudge my score
and I should be happy?
396
00:17:54,977 --> 00:17:57,243
Well, after all,
that's how I got into, uh...
397
00:17:57,313 --> 00:17:58,979
Oh, I can't say it.
398
00:17:59,013 --> 00:18:00,346
The lowest of the Ivys.
399
00:18:00,415 --> 00:18:01,981
Oh, God, help me... Cornell!
400
00:18:02,050 --> 00:18:03,150
Cornell! God!
401
00:18:03,219 --> 00:18:04,317
It's okay, you're fine.
402
00:18:04,353 --> 00:18:05,986
Oh, gloyvik.
403
00:18:06,055 --> 00:18:07,854
Okay, Homie, buckle up.
404
00:18:07,923 --> 00:18:11,391
Because there's no limit to how
neat your handwriting can get.
405
00:18:11,460 --> 00:18:12,759
Marge, I don't know.
406
00:18:12,827 --> 00:18:14,861
You can't teach an old dog new tricks.
407
00:18:18,299 --> 00:18:19,599
I'll help you.
408
00:18:24,573 --> 00:18:27,340
Lisa, turn off that oldies station!
409
00:18:40,224 --> 00:18:46,577
_
410
00:18:51,866 --> 00:18:53,599
Dearest Marjorie,
411
00:18:53,635 --> 00:18:56,470
what words are adequate
to describe your beauty?
412
00:18:56,538 --> 00:18:59,806
Like, a bowling ball,
fresh out of a polisher.
413
00:18:59,842 --> 00:19:00,973
Oh.
414
00:19:01,042 --> 00:19:02,409
I've always dreamed
415
00:19:02,478 --> 00:19:06,313
Homie would write me
cursive love letters.
416
00:19:11,686 --> 00:19:15,221
You are as beautiful
as your sisters are hideous.
417
00:19:15,290 --> 00:19:17,490
Oh...
418
00:19:23,464 --> 00:19:25,332
Oh, Homie.
419
00:19:25,401 --> 00:19:26,967
Mwah. Oh.
420
00:19:27,036 --> 00:19:29,403
I'm married to a writer.
421
00:19:29,438 --> 00:19:30,737
I really am.
422
00:19:36,318 --> 00:19:37,884
Welcome, all of you.
423
00:19:37,921 --> 00:19:39,854
You are the chosen people.
424
00:19:39,923 --> 00:19:42,390
Chosen to be my slaves.
425
00:19:42,459 --> 00:19:44,357
I am no one's slave.
426
00:19:44,426 --> 00:19:45,625
Well, doesn't matter what you think.
427
00:19:45,694 --> 00:19:46,927
The doors are sealed.
428
00:19:46,996 --> 00:19:49,163
Not this one.
429
00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:52,165
Wait, wait, you haven't heard
about the retirement plan.
430
00:19:52,201 --> 00:19:54,501
There isn't one.
431
00:19:54,570 --> 00:19:55,836
Fine, I don't need them.
432
00:19:55,904 --> 00:19:57,572
I don't need anyone.
_
433
00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:04,377
Oh. Why did you have me go back
for your slippers?
434
00:20:04,413 --> 00:20:06,780
How could you turn on me so quickly?
435
00:20:06,805 --> 00:20:12,190
- Sync and corrections by ByDem -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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