All language subtitles for The Princess Bride (1987) 720p 5.1 BRRiP x264 AAC [Team Nanban]

A Team Nanban (594mgnav) Release

(BOY couemwe)

(TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALL GAME
PLAYING ON VIDEO GAME)

(ELECTRONIC BEEPING)

Hi, honey.

Hi, Mom.

You feeling any better?

A little bit.

Guess what?

What?

Your grandfather's here.

Mom, can't you tell him
I'm sick?

You're sick?

That's why he's here.

He'll pinch my cheek.

I hate that.

Maybe he won't.

Hey, how is the sickie? Huh?

I think I'll leave
you two pals alone.

I brought you
a special present.

What is it?

Open it up.

A book?

That's right.

When I was your age,
television was called books.

And this is a special book.

It was the book my father used
to read to me when I was sick,

and I used to read it
to your father.

And today,
I'm gonna read it to you.

Has it got any sports in it?

Are you kidding?

Fencing, fighting,
torture, revenge,

giants, monsters,
chases, escapes,

true love, miracles.

Doesn't sound too bad.
I'll try and stay awake.

Well, thank you very much.
Very nice of you.

Your vote of confidence
is overwhelming.

All right.

"The Princess Bride,"

"by S. Morgenstern."

"Chapter one."

"Buttercup was raised on a small
farm in the country of Florin."

"Her favorite pastimes
were riding her horse"

"and tormenting the farm boy
that worked there."

"His name was Westley, but
she never called him that."

Isn't that
a wonderful beginning?

GRANDSON:
Yeah, it's really good.

"Nothing gave Buttercup as much
pleasure as ordering Westley around."

Farm Boy,
polish my horse's saddle.

I want to see my face
shining in it by morning.

As you wish.

GRANDFATHER: "'As you wish'
was all he ever said to her."

Farm Boy,
fill these with water.

Please?

As you wish.

"That day,
she was amazed to discover"

"that when he was saying,
'As you wish, '"

"what he meant was,
'l love you.'."

"And even more amazing was the day she
realized she truly loved him back."

Farm Boy,

fetch me that pitcher.

As you wish.

GRANDSONI Hold it. Hold it.

What is this?
Are you trying to trick me?

Where's the sports?

Is this a kissing book?

Wait. Just wait.

When does it get good?

Keep your shirt on.
Let me read.

"Westley had no money
for marriage,"

"so he packed his few
belongings and left the farm"

"to seek his fortune
across the sea."

"It was a very emotional time
for Buttercup."

GRANDSON: I don't believe this.

I fear I'll never
see you again.

Of course you will.

But what if something
happens to you?

Hear this now.

I will always come for you.

But how can you be sure?

This is true love.

Do you think this happens
every day?

"GRAN DFATHER: " Westley didn't
reach his destination.

"His ship was attacked
by the Dread Pirate Roberts,"

"who never left captives alive."

"When Buttercup got the news
that Westley was murdered..."

GRANDSON:
Murdered by pirates is good.

"...she went into her room
and shut the door."

"And for days,
she neither slept nor ate."

I will never love again.

(SHEEP BLEATING)

"Five years later, the main square of
Florin City was filled as never before"

"to hear the announcement of the great
Prince Humperdinck's bride-to-be."

My people, a month from now,

our country will have
its 500th anniversary.

On that sundown,
I shall marry a lady

who was once
a commoner like yourselves.

But perhaps

you will not find her common.

HOW.

Would you like to meet her?

ALL: Yes!

My people,

the Princess Buttercup!

(BUGLES PLAYING)

"GRAN DFATHER: " Buttercup's
emptiness consumed her.

"Although the law of the land
gave Humperdinck the right"

"to choose his bride,"

"she did not love him."

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

"Despite Humperdinck's reassurance
that she would grow to love him,"

"the only joy she found
was in her daily ride."

(NEIGHING)

MAN: A word, my lady?

We are but poor,
lost circus performers.

Is there a village nearby?

There is nothing nearby,
not for miles.

Then there will be no one
to hear you scream.

(GASPS)

What is that you're ripping?

It is fabric from the uniform
of an army officer of Guilder.

Who is Guilder?

The country across the sea.

The sworn enemy of Florin.

Go! Once the horse
reaches the castle,

the fabric will make
the prince suspect

the Guilderians
have abducted his love.

When he finds her body dead
on the Guilder frontier,

his suspicions will be
totally confirmed.

You never said anything
about killing anyone.

I've hired you
to help me start a war.

It's a prestigious line of work

with a long
and glorious tradition.

I just don't think it's right
killing an innocent girl.

Am I going mad

or did the word "think"
escape your lips?

You were not hired for your brains,
you hippopotamic landmass!

I agree with Fezzik.

The sot has spoken.

What happens to her is not
truly your concern.

I will kill her. And remember this.
Never forget this!

When I found you, you were so slobbering
drunk you couldn't buy brandy!

And you! Friendless. Brainless.

Helpless! Hopeless!

Do you want me to send you
back to where you were?

Unemployed? In Greenland?

That Vizzini,

he can fuss.

Fuss. Fuss.

I think he like
to scream at us.

Probably he means no harm.

He's really very short
on charm.

You have
a great gift for rhyme.

Yes. Yes. Some other time.

\/IZZINII Enough Of that!

INIGO: Fezzik,
are there rocks ahead?

FEZZIK: If there are,
we'll all be dead.

VIZZINI: No more rhymes now,
I mean it!

Anybody want a peanut?

(VIZZINI GRUNTING)

We'll reach the cliffs by dawn.

Why are you doing that?

Are you sure
nobody's follow us?

That would be inconceivable.

Despite what you think,
you will be caught.

And when you are, the Prince
will see you all hanged.

Of all the necks
on this boat, Highness,

the one you should be
worrying about is your own.

Stop doing that! We can all relax.
It's almost over.

You are sure
nobody's follow us?

As I told you,

it would be absolutely, totally and
in all other ways inconceivable.

No one in Guilder knows
what we've done

and no one in Florin could
have gotten here so fast.

Out of curiosity,
why do you ask?

No reason. Suddenly, I just
happen to look behind us

and something is there.

What?

Probably some local fisherman out for
a pleasure cruise at night through

eel-infested waters.

(WATER SPLASHES)

What? Go in! Get after her!

I don't swim.

I only dog paddle.

(GRUNTS)

Veer left!

Left! Left!

(SHRIEKING)

VIZZINI: Do you know what
that sound is, Highness?

Those are the shrieking eels!

If you don't believe me,
just wait.

They always grow louder when they're
about to feed on human flesh!

(GASPS)

If you swim back now, I promise
no harm will come to you.

IdoubtyouWlget such an
offer from the eels.

(SHRIEKING)

(SCREAMING)

She doesn't get eaten
by the eels at this time.

What?

The eel doesn't get her.

I'm explaining to you
because you look nervous.

I wasn't nervous.

Maybe I was a little bit concerned,
but that's not the same thing.

Because we can stop now
if you want.

No, you could read
a little bit more if you want.

"Do you know what
that sound is, Highness?"

"Those are the shrieking eels."

We're past that, Grandpa.
You read it already.

Oh. Oh, my goodness.

I did. I'm sorry.
I beg your pardon.

All right. All right. Let's
see, she was in the water.

The eel was coming after her.

She was frightened. The eel started
to charge her, and then...

Put her down.
Just put her down.

I think he's getting closer.

He's no concern of ours.
Sail on!

I suppose you think
you're brave, don't you?

Only compared to some.

INIGO: Look!
He's right on top of us!

I wonder if he is using
the same wind we are using.

Whoever he is,
he's too late. See?

The Cliffs of Insanity!

Hurry up! Move the thing!

And that other thing!

Move it!

We're safe. Only Fezzik is
strong enough to go up our way.

He'll have to sail around for
hours till he finds a harbor.

(BIRDS CAWING)

He's climbing the rope
and he's gaining on us.

Inconceivable.

Faster!

FEZZIK: I thought
I was going faster.

You were supposed
to be this colossus.

You were this great legendary thing.
And yet, he gains!

Well, I'm carrying three people,
and he got only himself.

I do not accept excuses.

I'm just going to have to find
myself a new giant, that's all.

Don't say that, Vizzini.
Please?

Did I make it clear
that your job is at stake?

He's got very good arms.

He didn't fall? Inconceivable.

You keep using that word.

I do not think it means
what you think it means.

INIGO: My God. He's climbing.

Whoever he is, he's obviously seen us with
the Princess and must, therefore, die.

You, carry her. We'll head
straight for the Guilder frontier.

Catch up when he's dead. If he falls, fine.
If not, the sword.

I'm going to duel him
left-handed.

You know what a hurry we're in!

It's the only way
I can be satisfied.

If I use my right,
over too quickly.

Oh, have it your way.

You be careful. People in
masks cannot be trusted.

I'm waiting!

Hello there!

Slow going?

Look, I don't mean to be rude, but
this is not as easy as it looks,

so I'd appreciate it
if you wouldn't distract me.

Sorry. Thank you.

I don't suppose
you could speed things up?

If you're in such a hurry, you could
lower a rope or a tree branch,

or find something useful to do.

I could do that.
I've got some rope up here.

But I do not think
you would accept my help,

since I am only waiting around
to kill you.

That does put a damper
on our relationship.

But I promise I will not kill
you until you reach the top.

That's very comforting, but I'm
afraid you'll just have to wait.

I hate waiting.

I could give you my word
as a Spaniard.

(GRUNTING) No good.
I've known too many Spaniards.

Is there any way
you'll trust me?

Nothing comes to mind.

I swear on the soul of my
father, Domingo Montoya,

you will reach the top alive.

Throw me the rope.

Thank you.

We'll wait... wait... wait
until you're ready.

Again, thank you.

I do not mean to pry,

but you don't by any chance happen to
have six fingers on your right hand?

Do you always begin
conversations this way?

My father was slaughtered
by a six-fingered man.

He was a great sword maker,
my father.

When the six-fingered man appeared
and requested a special sword,

my father took the job.

He slaved a year
before he was done.

I've never seen its equal.

The six-fingered man
returned and demanded it,

but at one-tenth
his promised price.

My father refused.

Without a word, the six-fingered
man slashed him through the heart.

I loved my father.

So, naturally, I challenged
his murderer to a duel.

I failed.

The six-fingered man
leave me alive.

But he gave me this.

How old were you?

I was 11 years old.

When I was strong enough,

I dedicated my life
to the study of fencing.

So, the next time we meet,
I will not fail.

I will go up to the
six-fingered man and say,

"Hello. My name
is Inigo Montoya."

"You killed my father.
Prepare to die."

You've done nothing
but study swordplay?

More pursue it
than study, lately.

You see, I cannot find him.

It has been 20 years now. I'm
starting to lose confidence.

I just work for Vizzini
to pay the bills.

There's not a lot of money
in revenge.

Well, I certainly hope
you find him someday.

You're ready then?

Whether I am or not,
you've been more than fair.

You seem a decent fellow.
I hate to kill you.

You seem a decent fellow.
I hate to die.

Begin.

You are using Bonetti's
defense against me, huh?

I thought it fitting,
considering the rocky terrain.

Naturally, you must expect me
to attack with Capo Ferro.

Naturally. But I find that Thibault
cancels out Capo Ferro, don't you?

Unless the enemy
has studied his Agrippa.

Which I have!

You are wonderful. Thank you.

I've worked hard to become so.

I admit that you are
better than I am.

Then why are you smiling?

Because I know something
you don't know.

And what is that?

I am not left-handed.

(GRUNTING)

You are amazing.

I ought to be, after 20 years.

(GRUNTING) There's something
I ought to tell you.

Tell me.

I'm not left-handed either.

Who are you?

No one of consequence.

I must know.

Get used to disappointment.

Okay.

(GRUNTING)

(PANTING)

Kill me quickly.

I would as soon destroy
a stained-glass window

as an artist like yourself.

However, since I can't have
you following me, either...

(GROANS)

Please understand, I hold you
in the highest respect.

Inconceivable! Give her to me.

Catch up with us quickly.

What do I do?

Finish him.
Finish him your way!

Oh, good. My way.
Thank you, Vizzini.

Which one's my way?

Pick up one of those rocks.
Get behind the boulder.

In a few minutes, the man in black
will come running around the bend.

The minute his head is in
view, hit it with the rock!

My Way's not
very sportsmanlike.

I did that on purpose.
I didn't have to miss.

I believe you.

So what happens now?

We face each other
as God intended.

Sportsmanlike. No tricks. No weapons.
Skill against skill alone.

You mean, you'll put down your
rock and I'll put down my sword,

and we'll try and kill each
other like civilized people?

I can kill you now.

Frankly, I think the odds are slightly
in your favor at hand-fighting.

It's not my fault for being the
biggest and the strongest.

I don't even exercise.

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTING)

Look, are you just fiddling
around with me, or what?

I just want you to feel
you're doing well.

I hate for people
to die embarrassed.

You're quick.

And a good thing, too.

Why are you wearing a mask?

Were you burned by acid
or something like that?

No, it's just that they're
terribly comfortable.

I think everyone will be
wearing them in the future.

(GRUNTING) I just figured why
you give me so much trouble.

(GROANING)

Why's that, do you think?

Well, I haven't fought
just one person for so long.

I've been specializing
in groups,

battling gangs for local
charities, that kind of thing.

Why should that make
such a... difference?

Well, you see,
you use different moves.

(GRUNTING) when you're
fighting half a dozen people

than when you only have to be
worried about one.

I do not envy you the headache
you will have when you awake.

But in the meantime, rest well
and dream of large women.

There was a mighty duel.

It ranged all over.
They were both masters.

Who won? How did it end?

The loser ran off alone,

but the winner

followed those footprints
toward Guilder.

Shall we track them both?

The loser is nothing.
Only the Princess matters.

Clearly, this was all planned
by warriors of Guilder.

We must all be ready
for whatever lies ahead.

Could this be a trap?

I always think
everything could be a trap,

which is why I'm still alive.

So, it is down to you

and it is down to me.

If you wish her dead, by all
means, keep moving forward.

Let me explain.

There's nothing to explain.

You're trying to kidnap
what I've rightfully stolen.

Perhaps an arrangement
can be reached?

There will be no arrangement,
and you're killing her.

(GASPS)

Well, if there can be no arrangement,
then we are at an impasse.

I'm afraid so. I can't compete
with you physically,

and you're no match
for my brains.

You're that smart?

Let me put it this way.

Have you ever heard of Plato,
Aristotle, Socrates?

Yes.

Morons.

Really?

In that case, I challenge you
to a battle of wits.

For the Princess?

To the death?

Iaccept.

Good, then pour the wine.

Inhale this, but do not touch.

I smell nothing.

What you do not smell is
called iocane powder.

It is odorless, tasteless,
dissolves instantly in liquid,

and is among the more deadly
poisons known to man.

Hmm.

(CHUCKLES)

All right. Where is the poison?

The battle of wits has begun.

It ends when you decide,
and we both drink

and find out who is right
and who is dead.

But it's so simple.

All I have to do is divine
from what I know of you.

Are you the sort of man

who would put the poison into
his own goblet or his enemy's?

Now, a clever man would put the
poison into his own goblet

because he would know that only a great
fool would reach for what he was given.

I'm not a great fool, so I can clearly
not choose the wine in front of you.

But you must have known
I was not a great fool.

You would've counted on it, so I can clearly
not choose the wine in front of me.

You've made your decision,
then?

Not remotely.

Becauseiocane comes from
Australia, as everyone knows,

and Australia is entirely
peopled with criminals,

and criminals are used to
having people not trust them,

as you are not trusted by me,

so I can clearly not choose
the wine in front of you.

Truly, you have
a dizzying intellect.

Wait till I get going.

Where was I? Australia.

Yes. Australia.

And you must have suspected I would
have known the powder's origin,

so I can clearly not choose
the wine in front of me.

You're just stalling now.

You'd like to think that,
wouldn't you?

You've beaten my giant, which means
you're exceptionally strong,

so you could've put the poison
in your own goblet,

trusting on your strength
to save you,

so I can clearly not choose
the wine in front of you.

But you've also bested my Spaniard,
which means you must've studied,

and in studying, you must have
learned that man is mortal,

so you would've put the poison as
far from yourself as possible,

so I can clearly not choose
the wine in front of me.

You're trying to trick me into giving
away something. It won't work.

It has worked!
You've given everything away.

I know where the poison is.

Then make your choice.

I will, and I choose...

What in the world can that be?

What? Where?

I don't see anything.

I could've sworn
I saw something.

No matter.

(CHUCKUNG)

What's so funny?

I'll tell you in a minute.

First, let's drink,

me from my glass
and you from yours.

(CHUCKUNG)

You guessed wrong.

You only think I guessed wrong.

That's what's so funny. I switched
glasses while your back was turned!

(LAUGHING) You fool, you fell victim
to one of the classic blunders.

The most famous is never get
involved in a land war in Asia,

but only slightly less
well known is this.

Never go in against a Sicilian
when death is on the line!

(LAUGHING)

Who are you?

I'm no one to be trifled with.

That is all you ever need know.

To think, all that time it was
your cup that was poisoned.

They were both poisoned.

I spent the last few years building
up an immunity to iocane powder.

Someone has beaten a giant.

There will be great suffering
in Guilder if she dies.

Catch your breath.

If you'll release me,

whatever you ask for ransom,
you'll get it, I promise you.

(LAUGHING)

And what is that worth,
the promise of a woman?

You're very funny, Highness.

I was giving you a chance. It does
not matter where you take me.

There's no greater hunter
than Prince Humperdinck.

He can track a falcon on a cloudy day.
He can find you.

You think your dearest love
will save you?

I never said
he was my dearest love,

and yes, he will save me.
That I know.

You admit to me
you do not love your fiancé?

He knows I do not love him.

Are not capable of love,
is what you mean.

I have loved more deeply than a killer
like yourself could ever dream.

That was a warning, Highness.

The next time,
my hand flies on its own,

for where I come from, there are
penalties when a woman lies.

Iocane. I'd bet my life on it.

And there are
the Princess's footprints.

She is alive, or was,
an hour ago.

If she is otherwise when I find
her, I shall be very put out.

Rest, Highness.

I know who you are.

Your cruelty
reveals everything.

You're the Dread Pirate Roberts.
Admit it.

With pride.
What can I do for you?

You can die slowly,
cut into a thousand pieces.

(CLICKING TONGUE)

Hardly complimentary,
Your Highness.

Why loose your venom on me?

You killed my love.

It's possible.
I kill a lot of people.

Who was this love of yours?
Another prince like this one?

Ugly, rich and scabby?

No, a farm boy. Poor.

Poor and perfect.

With eyes like the sea
after a storm.

On the high seas
your ship attacked,

and the Dread Pirate Roberts
never takes prisoners.

I can't afford
to make exceptions.

I mean, once word leaks out that a pirate
has gone soft, people begin to disobey you,

and then it's nothing but work,
work, work all the time.

You mock my pain!

Life is pain, Highness.

Anyone who says differently
is selling something.

I remember this farm boy
of yours, I think.

This would be what?
Five years ago?

Does it bother you to hear?

Nothing you can say
will upset me.

He died well.
That should please you.

No bribe attempts
or blubbering.

He simply said, "Please.
Please, I need to live."

it was the "please"
that caught my memory.

I asked him what was
so important for him.

"True love," he replied.

And then he spoke of a girl of
surpassing beauty and faithfulness.

I can only assume he meant you.

You should bless me
for destroying him

before he found out
what you really are.

And what am I?

Faithfulness he talked of, madam.
Your enduring faithfulness.

Now tell me truly. When you
found out he was gone,

did you get engaged to your
prince that same hour,

or did you wait a whole week
out of respect for the dead?

You mocked me once. Never do it again!
I died that day!

(HORSES GALLOPING)

You can die, too,
for all I care!

(SHOUTING) As you Wish!

Oh, my sweet Westley!
What have I done?

(GROANS)

(GROANING)

Disappeared. He must
have seen us closing in.

Which might account
for his panicking into error.

Unless I am wrong,
and I am never wrong,

they are headed dead
into the Fire Swamp.

Can you move at all?

Move? You're alive.

If you want, I can fly.

I told you I would always
come for you.

Why didn't you wait for me?

Well, you were dead.

Death cannot stop true love.

All it can do
is delay it for a while.

I will never doubt again.

There will never be a need.

GRANDSON: Oh, no, no, please.

What is it? What's the matter?

They're kissing again. Do we
have to hear the kissing part?

Someday, you may not
mind so much.

Skip on to the Fire Swamp.
That sounded good.

Oh.

You're sick. I'll humor you.

So, now, where were we here?

Oh, okay.

GRANDFATHER: "Westley and Buttercup
raced along the ravine floor."

(HORSE NEIGHING)

Ha! Your pig fiancé
is too late.

A few more steps and we'll
be safe in the Fire Swamp.

We'll never survive.

Nonsense.

You're only saying that
because no one ever has.

(ANIMAL SQUEALING)

(GROWLING)

It's not that bad.

I'm not saying I'd like to
build a summer home here,

but the trees
are actually quite lovely.

(THUDDING)

(OMINOUS POPPING)

(GASPS)

Well, now,
that was an adventure.

Singed a bit, were you?

YOu?

(OMINOUS POPPING)

Well, one thing I will say,

the Fire Swamp certainly does
keep you on your toes.

This will all soon be
but a happy memory,

because Roberts' ship, Revenge,
is anchored at the far end,

and I, as you know, am Roberts.

But how is that possible,

since he's been
marauding 20 years

and you only left me
five years ago?

I, myself, am often surprised
at life's little quirks.

(OMINOUS POPPING)

See, what I told you before
about saying "please" was true.

It intrigued Roberts, as did
my description of your beauty.

Finally Roberts
decided something.

He said, "All right, Westley."

"I've never had a valet.
You can try it for tonight."

"I'll most likely kill you
in the morning."

Three years, he said that.

"Good night, Westley.
Good work."

"Sleep well. I'll most likely
kill you in the morning."

It was a fine time for me. I was
learning to fence, to fight,

anything anyone would teach me.

And Roberts and I
eventually became friends.

And then it happened.

What? Go on.

Roberts had grown so rich
he wanted to retire,

so he took me to his cabin
and told me a secret.

"I am not the Dread
Pirate Roberts," he said.

"My name is Ryan.

"I inherited the ship from the
previous Dread Pirate Roberts,

"just as you
will inherit it from me.

"The man I inherited it from was not
the real Dread Pirate Roberts either.

"His name was Cummerbund. The real
Roberts has been retired 15 years

"and living like a king
in Patagonia." Thank you.

Then he explained the name
was the important thing

for inspiring
the necessary fear.

You see, no one would surrender
to the Dread Pirate Westley.

So, we sailed ashore,
took on an entirely new crew,

and he stayed aboard
for a while, as first mate,

all the time
calling me Roberts.

Once the crew believed,
he left the ship,

and I have been Roberts
ever since.

Except, now
that we're together,

I shall retire and hand the
name over to someone else.

Is everything clear to you?

(GASPING)

(SNIFFING)

(BOTH GASPING)

(couemwe)

(couemwe)

(couemwe)

(ANIMAL SNARLING)

We'll never succeed.

We may as well die here.

No. No.
We have already succeeded.

I mean, what are the three
terrors of the Fire Swamp?

One, the flame spurt.
No problem.

There's a popping sound preceding each.
We can avoid that.

Two, the lightning sand,

but you were clever enough to
discover what that looks like,

so in the future,
we can avoid that, too.

Westley, what about
the R.O.U.S.s?

Rodents of Unusual Size?

I don't think they exist.

(GROWLING)

(SNARLING)

(SCREAMING)

Westley!

(GROANING)

(OMINOUS POPPING)

(ANIMAL SHRIEKING)

(SQUEALING)

We did it.

Now, was that so terrible?

(HORSE NEIGHING)

Surrender.

You mean, you wish
to surrender to me?

Very well. I accept.

I give you
full marks for bravery.

Don't make yourself a fool.

But how will you capture us?

We know the secrets
of the Fire Swamp.

We can live there
quite happily for some time,

so whenever you feel like
dying, feel free to visit.

HUMPERDINCK: I tell you
once again, surrender!

WESTLEY: It will not happen.

For the last time, surrender!

Death first!

Will you promise
not to hurt him?

What was that?

What was that?

If we surrender,
and I return with you,

will you promise
not to hurt this man?

May I live a thousand years
and never hunt again.

He is a sailor
on the pirate ship Revenge.

Promise to return him
to his ship.

I swear it will be done.

Once we are out of sight,

take him back to Florin and throw
him in the Pit of Despair.

I swear it will be done.

I thought you were dead once,
and it almost destroyed me.

I could not bear it if you died
again, not when I could save you.

Come, sir.

We must get you to your ship.

We are men of action.
Lies do not become us.

Well spoken, sir.

What is it?

You have six fingers
on your right hand.

Someone was looking for you.

Where am I?

(HOARSELY) The Pit of Despair.

Don't even think...

(CLEARING THROAT)

(NORMALLY) Don't even think about trying to escape.
The chains are far too thick.

And don't dream of being rescued either.
The only way in is secret.

Only the Prince, the Count and
I know how to get in and out.

Then I'm here till I die?

Till they kill you, yeah.

Then why bother curing me?

The Prince and the Count
always insist

on everyone being healthy
before they're broken.

So, it's to be torture?

I can cope with torture.

You don't believe me?

You survived the Fire Swamp.
You must be very brave.

But nobody withstands
the machine.

She's been like that
ever since the Fire Swamp.

It's my father's failing
health that's upsetting her.

Of course.

"GRANDFATHER: " The King died
that very night,

"and before the following dawn,".

"Buttercup and Humperdinck
were married."

"And at noon, she met her subjects
again, this time as their queen."

My father's final words were...

GRANDSON:
Hold it. Hold it, Grandpa.

You read that wrong.
She doesn't marry Humperdinck.

She marries Westley.
I'm just sure of it.

After all
that Westley did for her,

if she didn't marry him,
it wouldn't be fair.

Well, who says life is fair?

Where is that written?
Life isn't always fair.

I'm telling you,
you're messing up the story.

Now, get it right!

Do you want me
to go on with this?

Yes. All right then.
No more interruptions.

"At noon, she met her subjects
again, this time as their queen."

My father's final words were,

"Love her as I loved her,"

"and there will be joy."

I present to you your queen,

Queen Buttercup.

(PEOPLE MUTTERING)

(BUGLES PLAYING)

WOMAN: Boo!

Boo!

Boo!

Why do you do this?

Because you had love in your
hands and you gave it up!

But they would've killed
Westley if I hadn't done it.

Your true love lives,

and you marry another!

True love saved her
in the Fire Swamp

and she treated it
like garbage.

And that's what she is,
the queen of refuse!

So bow down to her
if you want, bow to her.

Bow to the queen of slime,
the queen of filth,

the queen of putrescence!

Boo! Boo!

Rubbish! Filth! Slime!

Muck! Boo! Boo!

Boo!

(GASPING)

"GRANDFATHER: " it was 1O days
till the wedding.

"The King still lived, but Buttercup's
nightmares were growing steadily worse."

GRANDSON: See? Didn't I tell you she'd
never marry that rotten Humperdinck?

Yes, you're very smart.
Shut up.

It comes to this. I love Westley.
I always have.

I know now, I always will.

If you tell me
I must marry you in 10 days,

please believe
I will be dead by morning.

I could never cause you grief.

Consider our wedding off.

You, uh, returned
this Westley to his ship?

Yes.

Then we will simply alert him.

Beloved,

are you certain
he still wants you?

After all, it was you who did
the leaving in the Fire Swamp.

Not to mention that, uh, pirates are
not known to be men of their words.

My Westley
will always come for me.

Uh...

I suggest a deal.

You write four copies
of a letter.

Hlsend my four fastest ships,
one in each direction.

The Dread Pirate Roberts is always
close to Florin this time of year.

We'll run up the white flag
and deliver your message.

If Westley wants you,
bless you both.

If not,

please consider me as an
alternative to suicide.

Are we agreed?

Your princess is really
quite a winning creature.

A trifle simple, perhaps,
but her appeal is undeniable.

I know. The people
are quite taken with her.

It's odd,

but when I hired Vizzini to have her
murdered on our engagement day,

I thought that was clever.

But it's going to be
so much more moving

when I strangle her
on our wedding night.

Once Guilder is blamed, the
nation will be truly outraged.

They'll demand we go to war.

(CHUCKUNG)

Now, where is that secret knot?

It's impossible to find.

Ah!

Are you coming down
into the pit?

Westley's got
his strength back.

I'm starting him
on the machine tonight.

Tyrone,

you know how much I love
watching you work.

But I've got my country's
500th anniversary to plan,

my wedding to arrange,
my wife to murder,

and Guilder to frame for it.
I'm swamped.

Get some rest.

If you haven't got your health,
you haven't got anything.

Beautiful, isn't it?

Took me half a lifetime
to invent it.

I'm sure you've discovered my deep
and abiding interest in pain.

At present, I'm writing the
definitive work on the subject.

So, I want you to be
totally honest with me

on how the machine
makes you feel.

This being our first try,
I'll use the lowest setting.

(GROANING)

(GRUNTING)

As you know, the concept of the
suction pump is centuries old.

Really, that's all this is,

except that instead of sucking
water, I'm sucking life.

Pvejustsucked
one year of your life away.

I might one day
go as high as five,

but I really don't know
what that would do to you.

So, let's just start
with what we have.

What did this do to you?
Tell me.

And remember, this is for
posterity, so be honest.

How do you feel?

(WHIMPERING)

Interesting.

(YELLIN CLEARS THROAT)

Yellin.

Sire.

As Chief Enforcer
of all Florin,

I trust you with this secret.

Killers from Guilder are
infiltrating the Thieves' Forest

and plan to murder my bride
on our wedding night.

My spy network has
heard no such news.

Any word from Westley?

Too soon, my angel.

Paflence.

He will come for me.

Of course.

She will not be murdered!

On the day of the wedding, I want
the Thieves' Forest emptied,

and every inhabitant arrested.

(SIGHING) Many of the thieves
will resist.

My regular enforcers
will be inadequate.

Form a Brute Squad, then!

I want the Thieves' Forest
emptied before I wed.

It won't be easy, sire.

Try ruling the world sometime.

(PEOPLE CLAMORING)

"GRANDFATHER: " The day
of the wedding arrived.

"The Brute Squad had their hands full
carrying out Humperdinck's orders."

(NEIGHING)

(MEN SHOUTING)

ls everybody out? Almost.

There's a Spaniard
giving us some trouble.

Well, you give him
some trouble.

Move.

I am waiting for you, Vizzini.

You told me to go back
to the beginning, so I have.

This is where I am
and this is where I'll stay.

I will not be moved.

Ho, there!

I do not budge.
Keep your "Ho, there."

But the Prince gave orders.

(GRUNTING)

So did Vizzini.

When a job went wrong, you
went back to the beginning.

Well, this is where we got the
job, so it's the beginning.

And I am staying
till Vizzini comes.

You, Brute, come here!

I am waiting

for Vizzini.

You surely are a meanie.

Hello.

It's you.

True.

(GROANS)

You don't look so good.

(SPUTTERING)

You don't smell so good either.

Perhaps not. I feel fine.

(THUDDING)

"GRANDFATHER: " Fezzik and Inigo
were reunited.

"And as Fezzik nursed his
inebriated friend back to health,

"he told Inigo
of Vizzini's death

"and the existence
of Count Rugen,

"the six-fingered man.

"Considering Inigo 's
life-long search,

"he handled the news
surprisingly well.

"Fezzik took great care
in reviving Inigo. ".

That's enough! That's enough!

Where is this Rugen now,
so I may kill him?

He's with the Prince
in the castle.

But the castle gate
is guarded by 30 men.

(GRUNTING)

How many could you handle?

I don't think more than 10.

Leaving 20 for me.

At my best, I could
never defeat that many.

I need Vizzini to plan.
I have no gift for strategy.

But Vizzini is dead.

No. Not Vizzini.

I need the man in black.

What?

Look. He bested you
with strength, your greatness.

He bested me with steel.

He must have
outthought Vizzini.

And a man who can do that can
plan my castle onslaught any day.

Let's go. Where?

Find the man in black,
obviously.

But you don't know where he is.

Don't bother me with trifles.

After 20 years, at last my
father's soul will be at peace.

There will be blood tonight!

Rise and report.

YELLIN: The Thieves' Forest
is emptied.

Thirty men guard
the castle gate.

Double it.
My princess must be safe.

The gate has but one key.

And I carry that.

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

Ah! My dulcet darling.

Tonight, we marry.

Tomorrow morning, your men will
escort us to Florin Channel,

where every ship in my armada waits
to accompany us on our honeymoon.

Every ship but your
four fastest, you mean.

Every ship
but the four you sent.

Yes. Yes, of course.
Naturally, not those four.

(CLEARING THROAT) Your Majesty.

You never sent the ships.

Don't bother lying.

It doesn't matter. Westley
will come for me anyway.

You're a silly girl.

Yes, I am a silly girl,

for not having seen sooner that
you are nothing but a coward

with a heart full of fear.

I would not say such things
if I were you.

Why not? You can't hurt me.

Westley and I are joined
by the bonds of love.

And you cannot track that,

not with
a thousand bloodhounds.

And you cannot break it,
not with a thousand swords.

And when I say you're a coward,

that is only because you are the slimiest
weakling ever to crawl the earth!

I would not say
such things if I were you!

You truly love each other, and so
you might have been truly happy.

Not one couple in a century
has that chance,

no matter what
the storybooks say.

And so,
I think no man in a century

will suffer as greatly
as you will.

Not to 50!

(YELLING)

(YELLING)

Fezzik. Fezzik, listen.

Do you hear?

That is the sound
of ultimate suffering.

My heart made that sound when
Rugen slaughtered my father.

The man in black makes it now.

The man in black?

His true love is marrying
another tonight,

so who else has the cause
for ultimate suffering?

Excuse me. Pardon me, it's important.
Fezzik, please.

(SHOUTING) Everybody, move!

Thank you.

INIGO:
Where is the man in black?

You get there
from this grove, yes?

Fezzik, jog his memory.

I'm sorry, Inigo. I didn't
meant to jog him so hard.

Inigo?

Father, I have failed you
for 20 years.

Now, our misery can end.

Somewhere...

Somewhere close by
is a man who can help us.

I cannot find him alone.
I need you.

I need you to guide my sword.

Please.

Guide my sword.

He's dead.

Just is not fair.

Grandpa, Grandpa, wait. Wait.

What did Fezzik mean,
"He's dead"?

I mean, he didn't mean "dead."

Westley's only faking, right?

You want me
to read this or not?

Who gets Humperdinck?

I don't understand.

Who kills Prince Humperdinck?

At the end?
Somebody's gotta do it.

Is it Inigo? Who?

Nobody. Nobody kills him.

He lives.

You mean, he wins?

Jesus, Grandpa, what did you
read me this thing for?

You know, you've been very sick

and you're taking this story
very seriously.

I think we ought to stop now.

No, I'm okay. I'm okay.

Sit down. I'm all right.

Okay.

All right, now, let's see.
Where were we?

Oh, yes.

In the Pit of Despair.

Well...

The Montoyas have
never taken defeat easily.

Come along, Fezzik.
Bring the body.

The body?

Have you any money?

I have a little.

I just hope it's enough
to buy a miracle, that's all.

MIRACLE MAX: Go away!

What? What?

Are you the Miracle Max who worked
for the King all those years?

The King's
stinking son fired me,

and thank you so much for bringing
up such a painful subject.

While you're at it, why don't
you give me a nice paper cut

and pour lemon juice on it?

We're closed!

Beat it, or I'll call
the Brute Squad.

I'm on the Brute Squad.

You are the Brute Squad.

We need a miracle.
It's very important.

Look, I'm retired. And besides,

why would you want someone
the King's stinking son fired?

I might kill whoever
you wanted me to miracle.

He's already dead.

He is, huh? I'll take a look.
Bring him in.

I've seen worse.

Sir?

Sir? Huh?

We're in a terrible rush.

Don't rush me, sonny. You rush a
miracle man, you get rotten miracles.

You got money?

Sixty-five.

(SCOFFING)
I never worked for so little,

except once, and that was
a very noble cause.

This is noble, sir.

His wife is crippled.

His children are
on the brink of starvation.

Are you a rotten liar.

I need him to help avenge my
father, murdered these 20 years.

Your first story was better.
Where's that bellows cranny?

He probably owes you money, huh?
Well, I'll ask him.

He's dead. He can't talk.

(SCATTING)

Look who knows so much, huh.

Well, it just so happens that your
friend here is only mostly dead.

There's a big difference between
mostly dead and all dead.

Please, open his mouth.

Now, mostly dead
is slightly alive.

Now, all dead...
Well, with all dead,

there's usually only one thing
that you can do.

What's that?

Go through his clothes
and look for loose change.

Hey!

Hello in there! Hey!

What's so important? What you got
here that's worth living for?

True

love.

True love. You heard him.

You could not ask for
a more noble cause than that.

Sonny, true love is the
greatest thing in the world,

except for a nice M.L.T.

A mutton, lettuce
and tomato sandwich

when the mutton
is nice and lean

and the tomato is ripe.

(SMACKING LIPS)
They're so perky. I love that.

But that's not what he said. He
distinctly said, "To blave."

And as we all know, "to
blave" means "to bluff." Huh?

So you're probably playing
cards and he cheated...

Liar! Liar!

Liar!

Get back, witch!

I'm not a witch, I'm your wife!

But after what you just said,

I'm not even sure
I want to be that anymore.

You never had it so good.

"True love."
He said "true love," Max.

Don't say another word,
Valerie.

He's afraid. Ever since Prince Humperdinck
fired him, his confidence is shattered.

Why'd you say that name? You promised
me that you'd never say that name!

What, Humperdinck?

(SHOUTING) Humperdinck! Humperdinck!
Humperdinck!

Humperdinck! Humperdinck!

I'm not listening!

True love lies expiring,

(SHUDDERING) and you don't have the
decency to say why you won't help.

Nobody's hearing nothing.

Humperdinck! Humperdinck!

INIGO:
This is Buttercup's true love.

If you heal him, he will
stop Humperdinck's wedding.

Humperdinck!

Wait, wait.

I make him better,
Humperdinck suffers?

Humiliations galore.

(LAUGHING)

(SCATTING)

That is a noble cause. Give me the 65.
I'm on the job.

(EXCLAIMS)

That's a miracle pill?

The chocolate coating
makes it go down easier.

But you have to wait
15 minutes for full potency.

And you shouldn't go in swimming
after for at least... What?

An hour. A good hour.
Yeah, an hour.

Thank you for everything.

Okay.

Bye-bye, boys.

Have fun storming the castle.

Think it'll work?

It would take a miracle.

Bye-bye! Bye!

(SHEEP BLEATING)

(GRUNTING)

Inigo, there's more than 30.

What's the difference?

We've got him. Help me here.

We'll have to force-feed him.

Has it been 15 minutes?

We can't wait.

The Wedding's in half an hour.

We must strike in the hustle
and the bustle beforehand.

Tilt his head back.

Open his mouth.

How long do we have to wait before
if we know if the miracle works?

Your guess is as good as mine.

I'll beat you at your part.
I'll take you both together!

I guess not very long.

Why won't my arms move?

You've been
mostly dead all day.

We had Miracle Max make a
pill to bring you back.

Who are you? Are we enemies?

Why am I on this wall?
Where is Buttercup?

Let me explain.

No, there is too much.
Let me sum up.

Buttercup is marrying Humperdinck
in a little less than half an hour,

so all we have to do is
get in, break up the wedding,

steal the princess, make our escape.
After I kill Count Rugen.

That doesn't leave much time
for dilly-dallying.

You just wiggled your finger.
That's wonderful.

I've always been a quick healer.
What are our liabilities?

There is but one working castle gate.
Come on.

And it is guarded by 60 men.

And our assets?

Your brains, Fezzik's
strength, my steel.

That's it? Impossible.

If I had a month to plan, maybe I could
come up with something, but this...

You just shook your head.
That doesn't make you happy?

My brains, his steel and your
strength against 60 men,

and you think a little head jiggle
is supposed to make me happy? Hmm?

If we only had a wheelbarrow,
that would be something.

Where did we put the
wheelbarrow the albino had?

Over the albino, I think.

Why didn't you list that among
our assets in the first place?

(SIGHING)

What I wouldn't give
for a holocaust cloak.

There, we cannot help you.

Will this do?

Where did you get that?

At Miracle Max's.

It fit so nice,
he said I could keep it.

All right, all right.
Come on. Help me up.

Now, I'll need a sword, eventually.
Why?

You can't even lift one.

True, but that's hardly
common knowledge, is it?

Thank you. Now, there may be
problems once we're inside.

I'll say.
How do I find the Count?

Once I do,
how do I find you again?

Once I find you again,
how do we escape?

Don't pester him.
He's had a hard day.

Right. Right. Sorry.

Inigo. What?

I hope we win.

HUMPERDINCK: You don't seem
excited, my little muffin.

Should I be?

Brides often are, I'm told.

I do not marry tonight.

My Westley will save me.

(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

(ORGAN PLAYING)

(GARBLING) Marriage.

Marriage is what
brings us together

today.

Marriage,
that blessed arrangement,

that dream

within a dream.

YELLIN: Stand your ground, men!
Stand your ground!

(PEOPLE MURMURING)

YELLIN: Stand your ground!

I am the Dread Pirate Roberts!

(MEN EXCLAIMING)

There will be no survivors!

Now? Not yet.

My men are here, I am here,

but soon you will not be here.

Now! Light him.

The Dread Pirate Roberts

takes no survivors.

All your worst nightmares

are about to come true!

Thenlove,

true love,

will follow you

forever.

The Dread Pirate Roberts.

(HOARSELY)
is here for your souls!

(ALL CLAMORING)

YELLIN: Stay where you are!
Stand and fight.

Stay where you are!

So treasure your love...

Skip to the end.

Have you the ring?

(RUMBLING)

Here comes my Westley now.

Fezzik, the portcullis!

(GRUNTING)

Your Westley is dead.

I killed him myself.

Then why is there fear
behind your eyes?

Give us the gate key.

I have no gate key.

Fezzik, tear his arms off.

Oh, you mean this gate key.

And do you,
Princess Buttercup...

Man and wife!
Say, "Man and wife!"

Man and wife.

Escort the bride to the honeymoon suite.
I'll be there shortly.

He didn't come.

Kill the dark one
and the giant,

but leave the third
for questioning.

(GRUNTING)

Hello.
My name is Inigo Montoya.

You killed my father.
Prepare to die.

Fezzik! I need you!

I can't leave him alone.

He's getting away from me,
Fezzik! Please!

Fezzik!

I'll be right back.

(GRUNTING)

Thank you.

Strange wedding.

Yes, a very strange wedding.

Come along.

What was that for?

Because you've always been
so kind to me.

And I won't be
seeing you again,

since I'm killing myself once
we reach the honeymoon suite.

Won't that be nice?
She kissed me!

(LAUGHING)

(GROANS)

Sorry, Father.

I tried.

I tried.

You must be
that little Spanish brat

I taught a lesson to
all those years ago.

Simply incredible.

Have you been chasing me your
whole life, only to fail now?

I think that's the worst thing
I've ever heard.

How marvelous.

WESTLEY: There's a shortage of
perfect breasts in this world.

It would be a pity
to damage yours.

Westley! Oh, Westley, darling!

Westley, why won't you hold me?

Gently.

At a time like this?

That's all you can
think to say? "Gently"?

Gently!

(GRUNTS)

TYRONE: Good heavens.
Are you still trying to win?

You've got an overdeveloped
sense of vengeance.

It's going to get you
into trouble someday.

Hello.
My name is Inigo Montoya.

You killed my father.

Prepare to die.

Hello.
My name is Inigo Montoya.

You killed my father.

Prepare to die.

Hello!
My name is Inigo Montoya.

You killed my father.
Prepare to die.

Stop saying that!

(GROANS)

Hello!
My name is Inigo Montoya!

You killed my father!

Prepare to die. No!

Offer me money. Yes.

Power, too. Promise me that.

All that I have and more.
Please.

Offer me everything I ask for.

Anything you want.

(GROANS)

I want my father back,
you son of a bitch.

Westley,
will you ever forgive me?

What hideous sin
have you committed lately?

I got married. I didn't want to.
It all happened so fast.

It never happened. What?

It never happened.

But it did. I was there.

This old man said,
"Man and wife."

Did you say, "I do"?

No. We sort of
skipped that part.

Then you're not married.

If you didn't say it,
you didn't do it.

Wouldn't you agree,
Your Highness?

A technicality that will
shortly be remedied.

But first things first.

To the death. WESTLEY: No!

To the pain.

I don't think I'm quite
familiar with that phrase.

I'll explain.

And I'll use small words, so that
you'll be sure to understand,

you Warthog-faced buffoon.

That may be the first time in my
life a man has dared insult me.

It won't be the last.

"To the pain" means
the first thing you lose

will be your feet,
below the ankles.

Then your hands at the wrists.
Next, your nose.

And then my tongue, I suppose? I
killed you too quickly the last time,

a mistake I don't mean
to duplicate tonight.

I wasn't finished!

The next thing you lose will be your
left eye, followed by your right.

And then my ears. I understand.
Let's get on with it.

Wrong! Your ears you keep,
and I'll tell you why.

So that every shriek of every
child at seeing your hideousness

will be yours to cherish.

Every babe that weeps
at your approach,

every woman who cries out,
"Dear, God, what is that thing?"

will echo in your perfect ears.

That is what
"to the pain" means.

It means I leave you
in anguish,

wallowing in freakish
misery forever.

I think you're bluffing.

It's possible, pig.

I might be bluffing.

It's conceivable,
you miserable, vomitous mass,

that I'm only lying here because
I lack the strength to stand.

Then again,

perhaps I have
the strength after all.

Drop your sword.

(SWORD DROPS)

Have a seat.

Tie him up.

Make it as tight as you like.

HUMPERDINCKI Oh.

Where's Fezzik?

I thought he was with you. No.

In that case...

Help him.

Why does Westley need helping?

INIGO: Because he has
no strength.

I knew it. I knew you were bluffing!
I knew he was bluffing.

Shall I dispatch him for you?

Thank you, but no.
Whatever happens to us,

I want him to live a long life,
alone with his cowardice.

FEZZIKI Inigo!

Inigo, where are you?

Oh, there you are.

Inigo, I saw
the prince's stables.

And there they were.
Four white horses.

And I thought, "There are four of
us, if we ever find the lady."

Hello, lady.

So I took them with me, in case
we ever bumped into each other.

I guess we just did.

Fezzik, you did
something right.

Don't worry,
I won't let it go to my head.

You know, it's very strange.

I have been in
the revenge business so long,

now that it's over,

I don't know what to do
with the rest of my life.

Have you ever
considered piracy?

You'd make a wonderful
Dread Pirate Roberts.

GRANDFATHER:
"They rode to freedom."

"And as dawn arose, Westley and
Buttercup knew they were safe."

"A wave of love
swept over them,"

"and as they reached
for each other..."

What? What?

No, it's kissing again.
You don't want to hear that.

L...l don't mind so much.

Okay.

"Since the invention of the kiss,
there have been five kisses"

"that were rated the most
passionate, the most pure."

"This one left them all behind."

"The end."

Now, I think
you ought to go to sleep.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

All right.

Solong.

Grandpa?

Maybe you could come over and
read it again to me tomorrow.

As you wish.

A Team Nanban (594mgnav) Release

(STORYBOOK LOVE PLAYING)

Come my love
I'll tell you a tale.

Of a boy and girl
and their love story.

And how he loved her
Oh, so much.

And all the charms
she did possess.

Now this did happen
once upon a time.

When things were not so complex.

And how he worshipped
the ground she walked.

And when he looked in her eyes.

He became obsessed.

My love is like
a storybook story.

But it's as real
as the feelings I feel.

My love is like
a storybook story.

But it's as real
as the feelings I feel.

It's as real
as the feelings I feel.

"He said, " Don't you know
I love you, oh, so much.

"And lay my heart
at the foot of your dress?"

"She said, " Don't you know
that storybook loves.

"Always have a happy ending?"

Then he swooped her up
just like in the books.

And on his stallion
they rode away.

My love is like
a storybook story.

But it's as real
as the feelings I feel.

My love is like
a storybook story.

But it's as real
as the feelings I feel.

It's as real
as the feelings I feel