All language subtitles for The.Associate.1996.720p.HULU.WEBRip.AAC2.0.H.264-NTb.EN 23.976

As the fed lowers rates,

cheers erupted
on the floor

of the New York
stock exchange.

That was quickly
followed by a...

Beverage and oil issues
are the stand-out performers.

The dow industrial average
is up 16 points to 5,114.

The dow industrial average
is up 16 points to 5,114.

Inflation outlook for its
latest credit easing.

That was all the bond
market needed to hear

as it closed with
further posted gains--

Shareholders support
for a petition,

pulling
for the spin-off.

♪ Got an itch
for the bottom line ♪

♪ I will scratch your back
if you'll scratch mine ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ It's a matter
of give and take ♪

♪ As long all the benefits ♪

♪ As long all the benefits ♪

♪ Are on my plate ♪

♪ It's nice doin' business ♪

♪ Nice doin' business ♪

♪ With you ♪

♪ You'd better
save all the kisses ♪

♪ It's all strictly business ♪

♪ You foo-oo-ool ♪

♪ There's nothing in this world
that hasn't got a price ♪

♪ A date with Lucifer ♪

♪ A place in paradise ♪

♪ Got to raise my sights ♪

♪ I've got to stock my store ♪

♪ Why be satisfied ♪

♪ Why be satisfied ♪

♪ If I can get some more? ♪

♪ It's nice doin' business ♪

♪ Nice doin' business ♪

♪ With you ♪

♪ Nice doin' business ♪

♪ Nice doin' business... ♪

Very impressive.

Nice work, Walter.

Well, this was frank
and Laurel's show.

I'm just here to
make you feel important.

Don't let Mr. Manchester
yank your chain, Carl.

Don't let Mr. Manchester
yank your chain, Carl.

Everything that comes out of this
company has his stamp on it.

Laurel and I
just do the grunt work.

Eh! I didn't
grunt once.

You know,
it's amazing.

I'm making money,

and I don't
even understand

what fuzonics
does.

Well, fuzonics is gonna change
the way the world uses energy.

Is that so?

Reader's digest just ran
a big article on it.

He's such a kidder.

Science digest.

Eh-heh. Oh, wow,
look at the time.

We're gonna be late
for our meeting. Oh.

Keep up the good work,
you two.

They're quite a team.

Reader's digest,
frank?

Like they
would've checked.

If you hadn't
corrected me,

I would've slid
right under it.

Well, if you occasionally would
look at the material I gave you,

we wouldn't have
to be worrying about it.

Laurel--heh--
I have a life.

Come
to the floor!

I know somethin', and
I'm not gonna tell ya.

I can make you tell.

I can make you tell.

No, you can't,

not unless you're
a whole lot nicer to me.

I don't have to
be nice. Watch.

Ow. Ooh.

That was nice.

All right. Here it is:

Manchester's movin' c.W.
Up to senior v.P.,

which means...

Which means the standards
for senior v.P.

Must have dropped
dramatically.

That, too, yes, and...

It means there's
a v.P. Spot open,

and guess who's next in
line to fill that spot?

Who?
I think you know who.

No. I want you
to say it.

You. It's you, baby.

You've got seniority, and, thanks
to me, you've got the most kills.

So if we kill tonight,
you are in.

So if we kill tonight,
you are in.

Now, come on. We gotta
go in 2 minutes.

Don't be late. Sally?

Yes.
2 minutes.

All right.

Harry, you got
those proposals for me?

Well, get that promotion, and maybe
I'll get some respect in xerox.

I need them
in 2 minutes.

Eh-ehh.

Oh, wow!

Tie emergency.

Oh, this--
These clouds--

This new age thing

is gonna render
people mute.

Well, Mr. Peterson,
why did you pick it?

Oh, it was a present from
that moron Carl bode.

He didn't even notice.

Save me here, please.

Save me here, please.

Harry,
I need those proposals--

30 seconds.

Proposals.

Oh! Thank you.

Uh, what about
the magazine article?

You doubt Harry?

Great.

Metals, the depletions
of resources,

soaring costs of mining...
Mm-hmm.

And something about the
iron ore made me weep.

Ok, thanks, sweetie.

You're welcome,
sweetie.

Come on. Come on. Let's go.
We're late.

Ok.

Is--wait. Is that
what you're wearing?

Yes, that's what-- what are you, Mr.
Blackwell now?

You thought I was gonna
run home for 2 minutes

and change my clothes?
Never mind.

Where we're goin'
is very dark.

Where we're goin'
is very dark.

We're going
to the Huntley club.

What are you talking
about, it's dark?

No, we're not going
to the Huntley club.

I hate that place.

We're going someplace
much hipper.

Fine, just as long
as it's quiet.

Don't worry, mom.

♪ Ow, she's a brick ♪

♪ House ♪

♪ She's mighty, mighty ♪

♪ Just lettin' it
all hang out ♪

See? You're just satisfying
your need for raw material.

But once you pick up
recon recycling,

you're gonna
cut that need 30%,

saving your company
$13 million annually.

Saving your company
$13 million annually.

♪ House... ♪

And save
$13 million annually.

How does she do it?

I think
I'm in love!

Oh, yeah. I want
to have her baby.

What's the
payback period?

16 months. Look, it's
right here on page 6.

Hey, hey!
Hey, hey, hey!

Hey, you need numbers?

This deal has the frank
Peterson seal of approval,

and you need numbers?

Aw, holy shit!
Look at that.

Here. Take it up.

Here. Take it up.

Go.

Yeah.

♪ She's mighty, mighty ♪

♪ And she's lettin' it
all hang out... ♪

What are you doing, frank?

I'm giving the clients
what they want.

I don't think
it's what Sandy wants.

Trust me, it's not
a new experience.

See?

Come on,
hurt me, baby.

Could we get
another round?

Uh-huh.

Do you like
her breasts?

What?

I'm thinking
about having mine done.

But why?

Why not? It helps.

Why not? It helps.

Next time you're in a really
important business meeting,

try showing some cleavage, see
what a difference a chest makes.

Would you excuse me?

Enh!

Oh!

Yes, I love it!

We need to talk.

Now?

Now.

Ah!

♪ She's a brick ♪

What makes you think we
can get any business done

with these guys throwin' money
at a naked contortionist?

But this is business.

We're male-bondin'
like crazy over here.

We're male-bondin'
like crazy over here.

Look, I think it's time
for us to go now.

Now, come on.
You did your job,

and
very well I might add.

So if you want
to leave, leave,

but it's a done deal. It's
not a done deal, frank!

We haven't closed yet.

They're goin' back
to Chicago tomorrow.

You do it on a conference call.
When?!

In the morning.

Frank, I'm gonna
close this tonight.

All right, OK, fine.

I want you to go over there and tell
them it's time to go back to work.

Fine. No, no, no! Come on.

Fine. No, no, no! Come on.

Don't do that. Just--
Just--just go home.

You killed him.
He loved you.

Oh, yeah!

I know what I'm doin'.

You're drunk,
you know that?

Come on. Go.
Go on. Go home.

Go celebrate
or somethin'.

♪ Shake it down,
shake it down now ♪

♪ Shake it down, shake
it down, shake it down ♪

Go ahead.

♪ Shake it down,
shake it down ♪

♪ She's a brick ♪

♪ House ♪

Yeah!

Whoo!
Coupla brews!

Coming through!
Coming through!

Morning, Sally.

Morning, Sally.

Good morning,
miss ayres.

Frank in yet?

Got in at 8:00.

What, I'm in late?

I would not presume to say
you were late, miss ayres.

Good.

Where is he?

He's at a staff meeting.

What staff meeting?

The one Manchester
called for 8:15.

Thank you.

Sure thing.
Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

I thought they
were gonna arrest us.

I thought they
were gonna arrest us.

Anyway--anyway, they keep
playin' hard-to-get,

typical dog-and-pony show
bullshit.

They're concerned about recon's
debt and payback period.

Masters of the obvious,
these guys.

Anyway, I work 'em,
I work 'em,

I hack away
at their concern,

and then about,
oh, 3:00 this morning,

pfft! I close it.

Good show.

Helluva score,
frank!

Well done.

Well done.

Oh, well, of course, I couldn't
have done it without Laurel.

Attagirl, Laurel.

Way to share the praise,
frank!

There's always enough
to go around

after you make a score
like this one, huh?

Way to hang
in there.

So you tell me
to go home last night.

You tell me I can close my own
deal on a conference call.

Our deal. Jeez, I mean, I
thought you'd be happy.

They liked it so much,

they wanted to present
it to the board

as soon as they got back.

This is a big win for us.

For you.
For you, Laurel.

For your promotion,
Laurel.

For your promotion,
Laurel.

You killed, man.

Chester was eating it up.

What are we
fighting about?

We should
be celebrating.

What are you doin'
for lunch?

Nothing.

Great.

Oh, by the way, um...

Manchester put us in charge

of buying Anton schuller's
wedding gift.

We'll pick it up
after we eat.

Oh, wait a minute.

Damn it! I already have a lunch.
It's too late to cancel.

Ahem.

What do I know
about buying a gift?

Take Sally with you.
She's got great taste.

Take Sally with you.
She's got great taste.

Oh, I just--

Why don't you
just send Sally

and I can
finish my work?

'Cause Sally doesn't
have authorization

to use the company
charge account.

Well, if miss ayres
doesn't want me to go--

No, no.
Nonsense. Nonsense.

Women love shopping
together, right?

Listen, Sally knows
Manchester's tastes,

and we really want to
keep Manchester happy,

right?

Thanks, sweetie.

All right, we're done.

All right, we're done.

You go have lunch. I'm
going back to the office.

My lunch
is at the office.

Do you want
to walk together?

I'll tell you what,
we'll grab a cab.

My treat.

Uh, sorry,
miss ayres.

I forgot my place
for a minute.

Uh, get a cab.
I'll walk.

Uh, hey, just--say!

What are you
talkin' about?

I see the way
you look at me,

when you look at me,

like I was the ghost of
Christmas past or something.

What, has frank
finally driven you nuts?

Oh, frank's a jerk.
I can deal with that,

oh, frank's a jerk.
I can deal with that,

but you--you treat me like
I was some sort of relic.

I treat you?

Yeah, like a sec--
Like a secretary,

like a career secretary.

You know,
I'm good at what I do,

and in case
you haven't noticed,

the women's movement, it didn't
quite make it down to wall street,

and affirmative action
didn't help me!

Oh, wait a minute.
It wasn't supposed to.

And just
so you're clear,

I got here through
talent and hard work.

Yeah. Miss ayres, would you
just come with me for a minute?

I--I've got somethin'
I want to show you, please.

It won't take long.
Just right over--

All right. Just-- it's right.

All right. Just-- it's right.

All right. Just let me
show you something.

So what? Frank's havin'
lunch with Manchester.

Now, of course, I've never
had lunch with Manchester.

No. No,
no, no. You.

Why wasn't I invited to
that lunch with Manchester?

So much for
times changing.

You? You--
I trained you,

you? You--
I trained you,

and you
take my promotion?

Hey, you got screwed, OK?

But I don't think that should
change things between us.

Look...

Even though...
I am your boss now,

I really want you
to think of us as a team.

Should I move my desk?

The sun's gonna be hittin'
me all afternoon here.

What?

Sally?

Sally!

Can't you see that
I'm in a meeting?

Can't you see that
I'm in a meeting?

Can we have
some privacy?

Laurel, I went
to the mat for you,

but Manchester had
already made up his mind.

So should I be screaming
at Manchester?

That's right.
Very good.

Except he's on a plane to London.
Convenient.

And, uh, listen,
confidentially,

he thinks that
women who get passed over

tend to exhibit...

Negative attitude.

Then explain to me why it's
always a man who gets passed over

who shows up at the door
with an uzi!

Hey, hey,
I'm your friend here.

No! You
are not my friend.

Friends do not do this
to each other.

Friends do not do this
to each other.

You are a lowlife,

brain-sucking pig,

who would sell his mother up
the river to get the deal!

A v.P.
Has to be a closer.

How can I close? I do all the
work, you take all the credit.

You better be premenstrual.

Baby, if I was premenstrual,
you'd be dead.

All right, can you
handle the truth?

Can you tell the truth?
Yeah. Here it is.

There is no way in hell
you would ever make v.P.

It sucks, but
that's the way it is.

You're better off workin'
for me than some stranger.

You're better off workin'
for me than some stranger.

At least
I can protect you.

Well, let me be the first to
inform you, frank, as my new boss,

I quit.

It's cold out there,
Laurel.

Sally!

Sally!

Well, hello,
gorgeous.

Hey, color you Barbra.

It's the new me.
Am I not fabulous?

Like butter.

And does babs
command top dollar?

Honey, I'm makin'
twice the amount of tips

I made when I was doin'
Marilyn and Judy.

May they rest in peace.

Which reminds me.

I have your rent check
here for July and August.

Now all I owe you for
is September and October.

Now all I owe you for
is September and October.

Well, you know,
it's November now.

Eh, you would have
to rain on my parade.

Heh! God, how the months
keep mounting up.

But Barbra never ages.

Well, here, girlfriend,
I gotta run.

I'm late for
the midnight show.

Good night,
Mrs. cupchick!

Good night,
Barbra!

All right, girls, just
talk amongst yourselves.

Good night.

You're
home late.

Yeah. I had a great day,
so don't ruin it for me.

It's nice you young girls
have your careers,

but when you come home
to an empty apartment,

what do you really have?

What do you really have?

Independence.

It's overrated.

I'm going
to make some cocoa,

and you are not invited.

I'll be up in 5 minutes.

Have the little
marshmallows I like.

150,000--that's quite
an ambitious start.

Yes. Well, I've put together
a prospectus for you,

detailing the startup
costs of the firm

and the overhead and the
projected business profits.

Are you
currently employed?

Well, if I was employed,

I probably wouldn't have time to start
up a business right now, now, would I?

Do you have any assets?

Do you have any assets?

Well, yeah, I have drive
and courage and ambition,

and if you look
at the prospectus,

you'll notice that I have a very,
very sound business mind, too.

I was thinking more like
stocks, bonds, property.

Ah.

Now we're starting to sound a little
like a men's bank, now, aren't we?

Oh, I see.

Because we're
the women's bank,

we should go against
standard banking practices

and give you this very
large, unsecured loan

because you're
the right gender?

Because you're
the right gender?

Well, you know,
it might send a message.

Right, that women don't
know how to run a bank.

Touché.

We have depositors
to protect, miss ayres,

just like the boy banks.

I'm sorry.

We must have collateral.

I have a 6-unit apartment
building that my father left me.

Miss ayres,
I admire your courage,

miss ayres,
I admire your courage,

but... Are you sure?

No, but my father took a
chance buying that building,

and I'm sure he'd like me
to take a chance on this.

All right, then
I'll draw up the papers.

Thank you.

♪ Ah-ooh oh-ooh
ah-ooh ah-ooh ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Shadoop doop ♪

♪ Shadoop doop ♪

♪ Shadoop doop ♪

♪ Sha-doobie dah-how ♪

♪ Shadoop doop ♪

♪ Whoa-oh oh ♪

♪ Shah-doww ♪

♪ Shadoop doop ♪

♪ Shadoop doop ♪

Yeah. Hi, Lisa.
It's Laurel ayres.

No, I'm not with
Manchester anymore.

I have my own firm, Laurel
ayres investments. Yes.

I have my own firm, Laurel
ayres investments. Yes.

Is Mr. Anderson in?

We were very excited
about this.

Wonderful, wonderful.

But the west coast partners,
they didn't get it.

Sorry.

No, no. No, I'm, uh...

I'm no longer
with Manchester.

I'm, uh--I've got
my own place now--

Ayres investments.

Is Mr., uh, Johnson in?

Hell of a piece of work,
Laurel. I was impressed,

but my partner, the idiot
savant didn't get it.

I didn't know
you had a partner.

My wife.

No head for business, but her
father left her the company,

no head for business, but her
father left her the company,

and she's wild
in the sack.

Come on. All you
have to do is look at it.

What do you mean
"what's in it for--"?

I'll tell you
what's in it for you.

How about 2 tickets
to the ranger/detroit game,

the one that's sold out?

Yes. I happen
to have tickets.

Yeah. I'll tell you, if you let
me read the proposal to you,

all you have to do is watch
the game and listen to me.

Let's hear it
for your own,

Let's hear it
for your own,

your very own
New York rangers!

Uhh! Unh!

Well, most of the payments
are tax-deferred.

You're lookin' at a 191/2%
return in the first year.

Sounds good, Laurel. My
partners will never go for it.

They don't want
to tick off Manchester.

No, thanks.

Oh, no. I--
I understand, but, eh...

♪ Holy Moses... ♪
did you look at it?

'Cause
I'm sure if you'd--

No, but if I could--

♪ I have seen the spectre ♪

No.

♪ He has been here ♪

♪ Too ♪
I understand.

♪ Distant cousin... ♪

No. What can you do with
a partner like that?

All right.

Thank you.

♪ Holy Moses ♪

♪ I have been removed... ♪

Miss ayres.

Come in.

Thank you.

What are you doing here?

Oh, a friend
got your announcement.

And, uh...
What did he say?

Oh, he, um...

He didn't say anything.
Um, he just laughed.

This is beautiful.

Thank you.

Oh, my gosh.

Just... Beautiful.

So... Did frank send you
here to spy or something?

No, no.
I wouldn't, uh...

No, no. I just came, hoping
that you might, um... I--

No. I just wanted to see
how you were doing.

Oh, I'm doin' great.
Everything's fabulous.

Oh, I'm doin' great.
Everything's fabulous.

I don't even have time
to take my hair down,

everything's
goin' so quick.

Great.

See?

Does that all day,
all day, all day.

Yeah.

Well...

Oh.

I'm just gonna let the
machine get it, you know.

Oh. Oh, you know,
I can do this.

Let me just get this. No.

I don't need you
to do that.

Don't worry about it.
Here.

Ayres investments.

Uh, Mr. Carl bode?

I'm sorry. She's in a meeting
with a client right now.

I'm sorry. She's in a meeting
with a client right now.

Argh! Oh, just a moment.
Just one moment.

She's coming out
of that meeting.

Miss ayres?

Carl.

Oh, you got it.

So what did you think?

Oh, great.
And you loved it.

I knew you would. That's
why I sent it to you.

I said, "who can I
send this to? Carl bode."

Is it, uh--.

Is it something
I can handle?

Can I talk to them? I mean, I
don't mind taking a meeting.

Can I talk to them? I mean, I
don't mind taking a meeting.

Oh, well...

No, I understand.
No. It's--it's fine.

Yeah. No.

I understand.

Yeah. Bye-bye.

Isn't it funny...

That all the businessmen
in this city

all have partners who hate
everything that they love?

I mean, doesn't that
strike you as amusing?

Of course, I'm kidding myself.
I know that.

These guys don't
have any partners.

They're just...

Brushing me off.

Sal, would you mind
calling frank for me

and telling him I would
like to have my old job back?

Sure.

Sure, and, uh,
while I'm doing that,

um, could you just
set your head on fire?

Who, exactly,
are you calling?

Mr. Donald fallon.

Fallon industries?

I already tried him.
He's not gonna see me.

Hello? Hello, Betty?

Hi, uh, Betty,
it's Sally dugan.

Hi, uh, Betty,
it's Sally dugan.

Yeah. I heard you
were great on the lanes.

Oh, great. Great.
Yeah, um...

Betty, I need a favor
if you could manage.

Um... Could you put Laurel ayres in on Mr.
Fallon's calendar?

He's booked for a month?
Duh!

Betty, uh, if you could manage
it for me, it would be great.

Monday night?

We'll take it.
Monday's great.

Yeah, great. Ok.

Yeah, great. Ok.

All right, I'll see
you on the lanes.

Oh, your coke.

Bye-bye, Betty.

Ok, you're in.

The rest is up to you.

Go get 'em.
Go get 'em.

Go get 'em.

After that hand,
I gotta take a leak.

All right, boys,
5-minute break.

All right, boys,
5-minute break.

You know, you just
can't lose, can ya?

You must have a full
deck up your sleeve.

Bissel.

Get me an orange juice
and soda, please.

Yes, Mr. fallon.

So...

I'm Laurel ayres.
Pleased to meet you.

You're Laurel ayres?

Yes.
Bissel.

This is Laurel ayres.

I didn't set up
the meeting, sir.

He's a control freak.

That's why
he's so good.

Ah. Well,
I have a prospectus here

I'd love you
to take a look at.

Give it to bissel.

Give it to bissel.

He'll pass it on
to the partners.

It was--it was nice
meeting you.

No.

No?
No.

No partners. This
is for your eyes only.

All proposals go through
Mr. fallon's partners.

Yes, and then
they don't read them.

Are you brushing me off?

Yes, I--

But I thought I was nice.

Listen,

I'll be honest with you.

I thought
Laurel ayres was a firm.

You know, 2 guys.

I thought I was meeting a Mr.
Laurel and a Mr. ayres.

I thought I was meeting a Mr.
Laurel and a Mr. ayres.

Oh, the--the losers
are going in.

I'll have to join them.

I'm sorry
about the mix-up.

Well, you are, actually,
meeting 2 guys.

I mean...

I'm not a guy,
but my partner is a guy,

and there are two of us.

If this is so damned important,
where is your partner?

Away...

In Asia...

At the Asian
economic summit

where he's...
A guest speaker.

Are you trying
to impress me?

Are you trying
to impress me?

That's good.

What's his name?

His name?

Yes. They give them
to babies, don't they?

Of course, and--

And they've
given one to him.

Come on, Donald!
It's your deal!

I'm coming. I'm coming.

By the way,
I accept credit cards.

Cutty.

Cutty?

Oh, it's his name.

First name Robert, second
initial "s," last name cutty.

First name Robert, second
initial "s," last name cutty.

Robert s. Cutty.

Never heard of him.

Well, he's heard of you,
Mr. fallon,

and he's very concerned about
one of your corporations--

Bamf refrigeration?

Tell him to stop worrying.
It's doing fine.

Until 1998 when the cfc
ban goes into effect.

Ban?

Yes, and you'll
have to convert,

but he's found a company
that has a device

that makes conversion
unnecessary.

It would save you millions, but, of
course, you're not interested so--

No. Wait. Wait.
Hold on.

Hold on. Yes. Yes, I am interested.
Let me see that.

Hold on. Yes. Yes, I am interested.
Let me see that.

No. What do you mean, "no"?

Let me see it.

No.
Yes.

Here.
Hand it over.

Hand it over.

All right!
I'll have it.

I'll read this
carefully.

If it's any good,
you'll hear from me.

All right.

All right.

Thank you.

Damn.

Strange woman.

Bissel, move your ass!

Any of you boys heard
of this guy cutty?

Hi. Who's this?

Hi. Who's this?

Ashley?

Ashley,
this is Laurel.

I want
to talk to Sally.

Sally,
frank's assistant?

What do you mean, you're
frank's assistant?

Where is Sally?

She's Harry's assistant?

Harry is an assistant.

Look, you don't have to
take that tone with me,

and, yes, I do
know the extension.

Good-bye.

Harry.

I can't believe
Harry got my old job.

I can't believe
Harry got my old job.

Yeah?

Mrs. cutty, I have a note for Mr.
Cutty.

I think you have
the wrong address.

It's from
Mr. fallon.

Mr. cutty?

No. He's
in the bathroom.

I'll take that.
Thank you.

Yes!

Hi. I'm here
to see Donald fallon.

That's impossible.

Actually, it's not.
My name is Laurel ayres,

and if you
check your book,

you'll see I have
an appointment with him.

The only guest
Mr. fallon has listed

is Mr. Robert cutty.

Oh! He's, uh...
He's my partner.

I'll just go tell him
he's not coming.

Miss ayres...

This is the peabody club.

I'll see if Mr. fallon
wishes to come out.

I'll see if Mr. fallon
wishes to come out.

Women aren't allowed
past the lobby.

Oh, really?

Mm. Just for the last
150 years or so.

We couldn't
get into the lobby

until 1989.

I'm Camille Scott...

Oh, hi. Mr. fallon's
personal broker.

Hello, Camille.
You look incredible.

I knew
I'd be seeing you.

Nice to see you again,
Ms. ayres.

Sir. But I wanted to see Mr.
Cutty.

Oh, well, he's
stuck in a meeting.

More important
than this one?

Call Mr. cutty.

Tell him
he's got 5 minutes

tell him
he's got 5 minutes

to get out of his meeting
and get over here.

Well, actually,
Mr. fallon,

I--i--
I can't do that.

He's--it's not that he's
in a meeting meeting.

Really?

The fact of
the matter is that

he doesn't really--
I can't--

No, j-just stop.
Stop, stop, stop.

I--

I don't jerk people around,
Ms. ayres.

I wanna be in business
with Mr. cutty.

Well, he doesn't--

So even though
I'm under no obligation...

I'm giving him
a full commission.

I'm giving him
a full commission.

Whoo.

Wow, does it--

This means you...

Bought
the entire company.

You just tell Mr. cutty

be at my office
9 A.M. tomorrow.

I--look, I--

I don't wanna lie
to you, Mr. fallon.

I'm an honest person.
He doesn't really--

He's not--

You tell Mr. cutty

that Donald fallon
doesn't do business

with people
he's never met.

But, Mr. fallon,
you just did.

Thank you very much.

Ok.

Damn. Damn.

Ok, Mr. cutty,

time to bring you
to life.

Welcome.

♪ What a man, what a man ♪

♪ What a man,
what a mighty good man ♪

♪ He's a mighty,
mighty good man ♪

♪ What a man, what a man ♪

♪ What a man, what a man ♪

♪ What a man,
what a mighty good man ♪

♪ Gotta sing it now ♪

♪ What a man, what a man ♪

Yes. ♪ What a man, what
a mighty good man ♪

Mr. cutty.

♪ I wanna take
a minute or two... ♪

Date of birth.
He's gotta be over--oh!

Over 29? 1929 is perfect.

Black Thursday.
Financial world crashin',

a new savior is born.

I like you, Mr. cutty.
I really, really do.

I like you, Mr. cutty.
I really, really do.

1967. So where have you been
all this time?

♪ What a man, what a
mighty good man ♪

You've been retired.
Yes, living in sin.

♪ What a man,
what a man ♪

♪ What a mighty
good man... ♪

You made your fortune,
so you left. Now you're back.

Where are you?

Ooh, at the Plaza.
You have such good taste.

Ooh, yes. A jock's jock.

Because you play Polo.

Because you play Polo.

You're a big-game hunter
'cause you are such a man.

What about your wife?
You're married...

To a widower? No.

Hey! Hey!

Maybe you've
never been married,

but you're 67.
So why didn't you--oh!

Looking for someone
to love,

and you've searched
the entire world,

and you haven't
found her yet...

♪ What a man,
what a man ♪

♪ What a man, what a
mighty good man ♪

But you're
a little bit different.

Now we'll make you hot
to everybody that's cool.

♪ What a man ♪

♪ What a man ♪

♪ What a mighty
good man ♪

Stockbrokers--don't they
wanna know everything?

What is your net worth,
Mr. cutty?

Unknown.

Would you like
a cup of coffee, Mr. cutty?

You look a little pale.

Ah!

Hi.

Oh, Ms. ayres.
Hello, hello.

Hi.

I got you a present.

I just wanted
to say "thank you"

I just wanted
to say "thank you"

for setting up
that fallon meeting.

You know, he bought the proposal.
Oh.

Oh. Great.
Yeah.

So now I got offices,
new partner, stationery.

A partner?

Yeah, it's no big deal.

You didn't
have to do this.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Well, if there's ever
anything I can do for you,

you just call me, OK?

And, uh, thanks again.

Ms. ayres?

Ms. ayres?

Oh, Ms. ayres?

Yeah?

I, uh--i need a job.

What are you
talkin' about?

You already got a job.

It's a dead-end job.
You and your partner,

you're gonna need
an assistant, right?

And if
the company grows,

there might be room
for advancement.

Well, you know,

my--my partner actually
does all the hiring.

Well, then set up
a meeting for me.

Well, that--that'd
be kind of difficult.

Why?

Why?

Because he's got somebody
he wants to work with

and I don't wanna
step on his feet, you know?

Not you of all people.

What are you
talkin' about? What?

"I want you,
but my partner doesn't."

Oh, come on, Sally.
That's not a brush-off.

All right,
it's a little brush-off.

Look, why do you wanna
work for us anyway?

We're a new, little,
tiny company.

Oh, gosh. I've been
watching you for 5 years.

You know,
I know how you work.

There's no one like you.
You're so good.

There's no one like you.
You're so good.

And--and
you don't know this.

But there's
nobody better than me.

But we don't
have a lot of money.

I'll take it.

Ok. You're hired.

Wow.

Wait'll you see
Mr. cutty's office.

Oh, my gosh. Can I put--

Put your stuff down.
Yeah.

Thank you.

Of course,
it's not really my taste,

but what's a girl to do?

Oh, it's beautiful.
Oh, it's so beautiful.

It's beautiful.

I'll tell him.

Look at the fireplace.
Oh, my.

Did he shoot that rhino?

Uh, it's possible.
You know, he travels so much,

he brings all kinds
of things back.

Oh, my gosh.

Look at all the famous
people he knows.

Yeah, there's enough here
to open a deli.

Yeah, there's enough here
to open a deli.

I can't wait
to see your office.

My off--well,

I don't exactly
have an office per se.

So I'll be
using this one.

There's only one desk.

Is there a problem?

No problem. It's just--

It's beautiful.

Good.

So, um, h-how
did you meet him?

So, um, h-how
did you meet him?

Who?

Uh, your partner,
Mr. cutty.

Oh. Heh heh.

He read
one of my proposals.

Oh. How'd
he get that?

I don't know. You know,
somebody gave it to him.

He loved it.

He made some extraordinary
changes to it.

You know, we got together
over the weekend

and worked on it.

I like the name "cutty."
It's strong.

Yeah, it's been
a wild Turkey.

Huh?

Wow.

What?

I just thought
I saw s--

Oh, my gosh.
It is. It's him.

Aesop Franklin.

Seriously,
his name is aesop?

Yeah.

What's he do?

What's he do? Don't you
read Omni magazine?

The guy's only
the ceo of syntonex.

Ooh, here he comes.

What is he doin' here?

Don't look. Don't look.

That guy's a ceo?

Yeah. He started a software
business in his basement.

Yeah. He started a software
business in his basement.

Oh, man. He should
get out more.

Oh, Mr. Jacobson.

Hi, how are ya? I'm
sorry I'm late.

I was outside.
I looked in the window.

I didn't think this
would be the place...

Oh! We gotta go. We gotta go.
Come on. Get your coat.

No, no. The food
hasn't come.

No, no, it doesn't matter.
Shh, shh.

We haven't
eaten yet.

We didn't eat.
Just go.

All right.
Oh, gosh.

All right.
Oh, gosh.

Jeez. Ow.
What are you doin'?

Don't you get it?
Aesop Franklin

is meeting with
Randall Jacobson.

He's the president
of hewlett packard's

personal computer
division!

So what? What do
you mean, so what?

You know
what that means?!

It means it's possible
that hewlett packard

is gonna
take over syntonex.

How do you know that?

Look at where
they're meeting.

Stingy Lulu's?

So?

They're
meeting someplace

they figure no one
is going to see them.

Hey. We saw them!

Yes, we did.

We saw them!

Yes, we saw them.

So I gotta figure out
who to tell.

We're gonna
tell somebody

who's gonna blab.

Somebody with a big--
Oh, I know who! I know!

You can trust me, Laurel.

Discretion is my creed.

Yes, it's written
all over you.

Well, let's face it.

Men like doing business
with men.

Men like doing business
with men.

You got that right.

But they wanna
sleep with us,

and that's our power.

Ah.

Why doesn't cutty

just buy
the stock himself?

Well, you know,
personal reasons.

He doesn't want everybody
knowing his business.

Maybe I should meet
with him first, in person,

see what he's attracted to.

Well, to be perfectly
honest with you,

he's awfully attracted
to syntonex.

Syntonex? That stock
is in freefall.

Their marketing strategy and
distribution base are a joke,

their marketing strategy and
distribution base are a joke,

and they're carrying
a shit load of debt.

It would be a miracle
for that stock to move up.

Well, Mr. cutty
likes miracles...

And I trust this will remain
between the two of us, eh?

Laurel.
I'm a professional.

I know.

♪ Joy to the world,
the lord has come ♪

♪ Let earth
receive her king ♪

♪ Let earth
receive her king ♪

♪ Joy to the world ♪

♪ Yeah! ♪

Syntonex stock
has tripled

and it's
still climbing.

Like I don't read
the paper?

What about cutty?

Well, it took
some digging,

but I did manage to find this
file from the business--

You can
tell me inside!

You can
tell me inside!

Yes, sir.

Everything going OK
for you out here?

Yes, thanks.

Um... Um, Ms. ayres,

when do you think
I could meet Mr. cutty?

Well, probably never.

Never?

Well, not never never.
You know,

just not ever.
He's a real globetrotter.

Well, doesn't he ever
truck to New York?

Of course he does.
He just left.

Of course he does.
He just left.

But with, you know,
faxes and phones,

I mean, why bother?

Mr. fallon.

Good morning, Ms. ayres.

So nice to see you again.

Is cutty in?

He's never in.

This early.

He's never in
this early.

Sally, you can go.

Ms. ayres, um, this
is where my desk is.

Oh, of course it is.
Heh heh.

It's where her--
Why don't you come with me

into Mr. cutty's office?

Into Mr. cutty's office?

Well, thank you.

Congratulations
on syntonex.

Thank you. Camille, you weren't
supposed to say anything.

You know
how this town is.

I'm learning.

Why didn't cutty
let his friends in on it?

Well, his friends
are also his clients,

and unfortunately,
you're still with Manchester.

He knows
Barbra Streisand?

They dated.

Listen, by the way,
Mr. cutty wants you

to sell all of his
syntonex shares at 54.

54? Most analysts
predict

it'll peak
in the sixties.

It'll peak
in the sixties.

Well, Mr. cutty's not like
most analysts, now, is he?

Ms. ayres?

Sir?

I'm ready to throw
a lot of money cutty's way--

My money.

All he needs to do
is meet with us.

Well, I did speak
to him about that,

and unfortunately,

it's just not gonna
be possible.

However, I could cancel
my 10 A.M.

Well, I might just
fly down to Florida

and crash that meeting
with Harley Mason.

You know about that?

You know about that?

Yes. Harley
called me to gloat.

Ah. Well, he may not
be gloating for long.

You see, Mr. cutty won't be
making that meeting, either,

and has put me in charge.

Really?
What's your handicap?

Oh. I don't play golf.

You see?
Mr. Harley Mason

goes to Florida
to play golf.

He never talks business

unless it's on the back 9.

Have cutty call me
and have a nice trip.

Come on, bissel.
Move your ass.

I'll take this one.

The back 9,
you boys disappear.

Yes, sir.

I wanna speak
to cutty alone.

Yes, sir.
Of course.

Yes, sir.
Of course.

Mr. Mason.

I'm Laurel ayres.
I'm Mr. cutty's partner.

Unfortunately, he's been
tied up in Bangkok,

but he did send
a replacement.

You?

Heh heh heh. I'm the queen
of the windmill hole.

That's what I do well.
But, Johnny--

Johnny Miller.

It's Johnny Miller.
Yeah.

Mind if I tag along
with you gentlemen?

Tag along? Hell, no.

And I won't even mention
how much money I lost

when you pulled that upset
at pebble beach in '94.

When you pulled that upset
at pebble beach in '94.

Well, sorry
about that.

Oh, well, don't be.
Just let me win a few holes

so I have somethin'
to brag about. Heh.

Well, now, you boys
have a good time,

and when you're done,
Mr. Mason, you come and see me,

and we'll talk
about that proposal.

Uh, Ms. ayres?
Sir?

Consider it sold.

No.

And you tell
Robert cutty that...

He's in a class
by himself.

Ain't he, though?
Heh heh heh.

You go ahead and play now.

Johnny's waitin' for you.

Johnny's waitin' for you.

Just hit a couple-a
for me.

Bye.

Ooh, excuse me, child.

Donald, you're more
than a client.

You're a friend,
and as a friend,

I feel that I have to
warn you of the danger.

Nobody even knows
who this cutty is.

He bought syntonex
before it went up,

and he sold it one point
before it went down.

And now that bastard
Harley Mason

just put
a bundle with him.

He got lucky once.

He got lucky once.

Look who cutty
chose for a partner,

for Christ's sake.

I fired her.

If I were you, frank,

I wouldn't
spread that around.

Sorry, Walter. That's
the way the cookie crumbles.

Good-bye.

If Donald fallon leaves,

others will follow.

Either get something
on cutty

or get us into bed
with him.

And now the buzz
from wall street.

Move over, Dean witter.

Step aside,
Walter Manchester.

Step aside,
Walter Manchester.

There's a new bull in town,

and his name
is Robert cutty.

This is Cindy Mason,
the New York post.

Thank you for all your faith in Mr.
Cutty.

He will not
let you down.

Uh, when will
Mr. cutty contact us?

Probably never.

What?

He never calls clients
unless something's wrong.

That's why no one
ever hears from him.

Oh, I see. Thank you,
Laurel, very much.

Gentlemen?

Thank you.
Bye-bye now.

Good day.
Thank you.

Good day.
Thank you.

Good day.
Good day.

Good day.
Good day.

So tired.

But Ms. ayres, I'm sorry.
You can't relax quite yet.

You have 3 more
Cindy Mason readers

due in one half hour.

All right. That means I
gotta go pull out the box.

The box?

Yeah. The box.

The one that has
all my great ideas

that Manchester
hated.

Oh. That box.

I--i got rid of it.

It was such a clutter
in the closet.

You what?

Um, I got rid of it.

Um, I got rid of it.

Go get it.

No. I, well--
It--it's in the garbage.

Are you crazy? Did I
hire you to take my box

that had all the great ideas
that I loved

and cutty loved and Manchester
hated and put it in the garbage?

You threw my future
in the garbage?

Ms. ayres, I--i put it all, um...
What?

In here.
What are you doing?

All your files
are in here

in a--in a program
that I designed.

It's catalogued,
it's categorized,

it's cross-
categorized,

it's indexed,
and it's referenced.

The box is in here?

Yes.

This is great!

Who knew
you had this in you?

Oh, I did. Heh.

Boy,
were you wasted on frank.

Yes.

Cutty-ayres.

Just one moment,
miss Scott.

It's that woman
for Mr. cutty.

Oh.

Camille. Hey.

Oh, Laurel, hi.

I asked to speak
with Robert.

Oh, well,
you missed him.

He was in Washington
this morning.

You know, he's on his way
to Rome to see the pope.

You know, he's on his way
to Rome to see the pope.

- The pope?
- Oh...

You know, the pope doesn't
make a move without him.

Really?
The pope!

I wanted to thank him
for the flowers.

He sent you flowers?

Oh, you didn't know?

No. Well, how could I know everything
that goes on in this man's--

I mean, he's just fab--
What, Sally?

Hold on. What?

Oh, I'm sorry,
I've got to go, Camille.

Robert's on the other line.

Robert's on the line?
Tell him I'm on the line.

Laurel?

Bye-bye now.

Hello?

Hello?

Yakita, yakita, yakita.
This woman!

This is fabulous.

This is incredible.

This is amazing!
You are just--

You're a find.

Would you tell
Mr. cutty that?

Yeah. Sure!

Gosh.

The pope.

Mr. Carter.

Hi. Frank Peterson
from Manchester investments.

Hi. Frank Peterson
from Manchester investments.

Right. I totally understand.
I'll get right to the point.

Robert cutty.

Well, I was wondering if, in any
of your overseas operations,

you've had any contact
with him.

His company--
Small. Insignificant.

Yeah, I can't even find
anyone who's met him.

♪ Mr. big stuff ♪

♪ Mm-hmm ♪

♪ Who do you think you are,
Mr. big stuff? ♪

♪ Tell me ♪

♪ You're never gonna
get my love ♪

♪ You're never gonna
get my love ♪

♪ Mr. big stuff ♪

♪ Mmm ♪

♪ You're never gonna
break my heart ♪

♪ Mr. big stuff ♪

♪ Mmm... ♪

But I hear
he's very weird,

eccentric.

He won't even
take meetings.

C-u-t-t-y.

Yes, sir, I believe
it is spelled

just like the scotch.

His phone number?

♪ Mr. big stuff ♪

Yes, I understand
you have a reservation.

Yes, I understand
you have a reservation.

It'll be at least
20 minutes.

With this
it's just a fad.

Cutty is gonna
crash and burn

and take his clients
with him.

Excuse me.

Dalton, I am here
with Donald trump.

For god's sake, how
long is it going to be?

I have checks sitting
on 2 tables.

Ah, miss ayres,
how nice to see you.

I have Mr. cutty's
usual table.

Cutty?
They're lookin' for you.

Sorry, frank,
but I'm gonna go

crash and burn
with cutty.

Call me.

♪ Mr. big stuff ♪

Newspaper, sir?

Hello,
and welcome aboard.

Please fasten
your seatbelt.

Slip the metal fitting
into the buckle,

then pull on the loose end
of the strap to tighten...

You're aesop Franklin,
aren't you?

How was your meeting
with the stockholders?

Hewlett-packard.

Hewlett-packard.

Do I know you?

Actually,
no, you don't.

I'm Laurel ayres with
cutty-ayres investments.

We've been talking a lot
about you, actually.

Seems like you're going to need
some investment counseling.

Yeah, I, uh--
I don't understand.

Well, you're selling
your company,

all that money.

You're not gonna be
able to just stick that

in a savings
account.

Oh, see--there's
the misunderstanding.

There's no money.
There's just a job.

What do you mean,
"there's no money"?

You do this
for a lousy job?

You do this
for a lousy job?

The job is not lousy.

The deal is lousy.

Then why are you
doing it?

Well, I have to.

Why?

Syntonex, is...

Bankrupt.

What?!

Bankrupt.

And the only way I can save
it is to give it away.

Oh... You don't just give
up the company. So...

Well...
All right, all right,

imagine that
you had a company

imagine that
you had a company

and that you loved this
company-- nurtured it.

You--it's
your whole life.

Right?
Right.

But your company's dying.

Well--no.

Actually, uh...

There may be another
way to save it.

I have a guy I'd
like you to talk to.

His name
is Robert cutty.

Robert cutty.
Mm-hmm.

Who are you?

I'm Laurel ayres.

You're Laurel.
Well, I'm aesop.

Aesop...
Franklin.

Yeah, Franklin.
That's right.

Page 15.
Robert cutty.

If anybody
can save it, he can.

If anybody
can save it, he can.

Sally, I'm back.

Hi. Welcome.
Welcome.

Sally, aesop.
Aesop, Sally.

Hello.

I wanted to go home,
but--but...

But we have work
to do.

Mr. cutty's going to
save aesop's company.

Now, tell me, did any files
arrive for me today?

I think so.

It's on your desk,
next to your mail.

Very good.
Thank you.

Come on, aesop.

Uh...

Uh...

These are your files?

It's a mess,
isn't it?

Is there anything
living in here?

It's hopeless.
I know it.

I can't run
a company.

I can't even run
a bath.

What am I doing
here?

What if hewlett-packard
finds out?

They'll pull out.
I'll lose everything.

Aesop. What? Sit down.

Oh. Sit down.

Sit.
Yeah.

Sit.
Yeah.

Sally, can you come in
for a second?

I have a challenge to that
fabulous program of yours.

Think this is gonna
be a problem?

No problem.

Really?

Well, maybe
a little problem.

Oh, by the way,

the envelope on top,

you're supposed to r.S.V.P.
By this evening.

Mr. fallon has invited you and Mr.
Cutty

to his annual Thanksgiving
charity ball.

It's black tie.

Well, unless
you're a pilgrim.

Well, unless
you're a pilgrim.

Sorry.

I'm--I'm--um...

Everybody in the financial
world will be there.

That's good.

That's actually
very good.

Aesop.

Aesop!
Huh?

Would you mind
being my date?

It's a perfect opportunity
to introduce you

to the movers
and the shakers.

Ok.

I mean, I love
black tie parties.

Even I look good.

I'm sure you do.

All righty, then,
thank you, Sally.

♪ Go... ♪

♪ On with the show ♪

Fabulous

oh, there's no business
like show business.

So, girlfriend, what look
are we going for this time?

Well, I don't know, Charlie,
it's such a big night,

and all these bigwigs from
wall street will be there.

And all these bigwigs from
wall street will be there.

Well... The slut look
never fails.

I know, but I have
to look intelligent.

After all, I'm representing
Robert cutty.

Slutty,
yet intelligent.

News anchor.

♪ A fine romance ♪

♪ With no kisses ♪
right there.

♪ A fine romance,
my friend ♪

♪ This is ♪

♪ This is ♪

♪ We should be like
a couple of hot tomatoes ♪

♪ But you're as cold as
yesterday's mashed potatoes... ♪

This is what I call
giving thanks.

Please don't leave me
alone with these people.

Aesop, that's my hand
you're crushing.

Shall we go in?

You all right?
Yeah.

That was a very
profitable merger.

Thank you.
Arigato!

Thank you.
Arigato!

Miss ayres.
Excuse me.

Miss ayres, my money
has never been

in more
beautiful hands.

Nor has it ever had
a better rate of return.

Cutty's amazing.
No doubt about that.

The governor remembers
him from wharton.

Isn't that funny?
He's never mentioned it.

Where is Robert
tonight?

He sent me a personal
note saying he'd be here.

Well, you see, Camille, he's
actually swamped in Bangladesh,

so he won't be here,

but I managed to bring
someone equally brilliant.

But I managed to bring
someone equally brilliant.

Huh?
Aesop Franklin,

ceo of syntonex.

Ceo?
Not anymore.

Congratulations
on the sale.

Uh...

Well, actually,
Mr. cutty may end up

disappointing
hewlett-packard.

I'm intrigued.

Camille, get Mr. Franklin
a drink.

Sure.

I love your tux.

Laurel...

It's OK. Go ahead.
Go ahead.

Tell me more.
Tell me more.

Well, Robert seems to think
that if left independent,

well, Robert seems to think
that if left independent,

syntonex can be
a money machine.

He does know
what a mess it's in.

Oh, yes, but he's fixed
worse than this.

You mean cutty's
going to reorganize

the entire company
personally?

And oversee
its management.

He's that sure?

He's putting
his own money in...

Until, of course, he finds
a few select investors.

Let me talk
to a few people.

I'll be back.

I know you will.

I know you will.

Oh--oh--ooh.

Laurel? Laurel ayres.

I'm Cindy Mason.

I write
a little column.

Oh, yes. I loved what you
wrote about Mr. cutty.

Thank you.
Thank you.

I'm flattered.

You know, Laurel,
I'd love to write

your fascinating story.

Would you?

Now I'm flattered.

A young woman
starts at the bottom,

a young woman
starts at the bottom,

stays there,
and then gets fired

and winds up
being partners

with the most talked-about
man on wall street.

That sounds
like fiction to me.

Well, the best
stories always do.

Well, they do
when I tell them.

Of course, in order to make
this story really work,

I'd have to speak
with Mr. cutty in person.

To do a story on me,

you want to speak
to Mr. cutty.

Well, it's a perfect
arrangement, isn't it?

But it's not
so perfect.

But it's not
so perfect.

You see, Mr. cutty doesn't
speak to the press.

Nice to meet you.

Laurel, it doesn't pay
not to talk to Cindy.

You know,
I like your 'do.

Do you?

Mm-hmm.

I do, too.

I'm a little shy, so I don't
want you to leave me, OK?

You stick right
with me.

Wow... Laurel!

Wow... Laurel!

You look great.

What happened?

I'm told it's
what happens to women

when they leave bad
relationships, frank.

Oh, come on.
Let's be friends.

Dance with me.
I don't want to dance.

Come on,
dance with me.

I've got some very
good news for you,

and I'm not
gonna tell you

unless you dance
with me.

Dance faster, frank. You're
making my skin crawl.

Ha, ha, I've missed
your sense of humor.

Ok, here it is.

Manchester
wants you back.

Really?
What happened?

Did they discover that
all your original ideas

did they discover that
all your original ideas

were mine?

He respects you,
Laurel.

He always has.

He wants to make you
a senior v.P.

V.P.? Senior?

You'd be one of the
highest-ranking women execs

in the business.
Wow.

But I'd also be
your boss, frank.

Well... Of course,
I'd move up, too.

Uh-huh.
Just think about it.

With Manchester
and cutty together,

we'd own wall street.

Heh heh heh.
Forget it, baby.

Manchester
doesn't get cutty,

Manchester
doesn't get cutty,

and he doesn't
get me.

Well, if it's
not Manchester,

it'll just be
someone else.

Everybody wants cutty,

and without him,
you're nothing.

You know, frank,

I can afford
to have you killed.

Should I take that
as a no?

See, interlinks
will make the nets obsolete.

Here you go.

Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh!

You can conference

with the library
in Moscow

and--and your grandmother
in south America.

Here,
you. You try it.

Very good!

It's all on a point
and click interface.

Anybody can do it.

Not me.

Hey, should we check out
your portfolio, Mr. fallon?

Don't you dare.

See...

Did you know about this
interlink software

he's developed?

It could be
revolutionary.

It could be
revolutionary.

We know.

And check this out.

Laurel, we need to
meet cutty on this.

In person. Robert
cutty in person.

You get it?

I'll try.

He's really, really not into
having personal meetings.

I'll do my best.

That's not
good enough.

All I want to hear
is when and where.

All I want to hear
is when and where.

Well I'll--
I'll call him

and I'll see
what I can set up,

and then I'll call you.

Look, look, look.

No, Mr. cutty is not in.

No, I don't.
I'm sorry.

Cutty-ayres.
Oh, dear.

Oh, just one moment.
Cutty-ayres.

You seen the paper
this morning?

That Cindy Mason!
You see what she wrote?!

This trash? The cow didn't
even mention my name!

Is it really true he's
having all these affairs?

I thought Mr. cutty was
searching for true love.

I thought Mr. cutty was
searching for true love.

He's a man. That's
how they search.

Did something happen
last night?

Happen to me?
Oh, no.

What could've possibly
happened to me?

Nobody wanted to know
anything about me.

They only wanted to know
about cutty.

I'm telling you, the guy's
a pain in my behind now.

I regret the day
that I ever made him a--

Part... Of my life.

It was like I had nothing
to do with cutty-ayres,

like I didn't exist.

Ok, um, let's go back
2 months ago.

Ok, um, let's go back
2 months ago.

Yes, 2 months b.C.

"B.C."?

Before cutty.

You just don't have
enough to do, do you?

You make these up
at your desk?

Well, before cutty
you had no job,

no prospects,
and a big debt.

Minor details.

You yourself
call him a genius.

He's more elusive
than Howard Hughes.

I've never even
met him.

And you give him
all the credit.

And you give him
all the credit.

I gave him the credit because I
wanted him to have a little respect.

Well, you got
what you wanted.

Thank you.

Ok, now, what's this
secret cutty meeting

that everybody's
been calling me about?

You don't want to know.

Well, CNN called,
the times called,

Cindy Mason called
and offered me $1,000

if I'd give her
the location--

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Cindy Mason offered you
$1,000 for the location?

Uh-huh.

What?
Heh heh heh heh.

Heh heh heh.

Call her back and tell her
you'll take it.

Call her back and tell her
you'll take it.

What?!

Tell her
you will take the money,

and call all
those people back

and tell them you'll
take their money, too.

Oh!

What are you
going to do?

I'm gonna perpetrate
a great big whammy.

Heh heh heh heh.

Where the hell
is cutty?

My feet
are killing me.

That camera touches my
hair one more time,

that camera touches my
hair one more time,

you'll be sending video
from your lower intestines.

Yeah, yeah.

Thank you.
Thank you very much.

Hello, darling.
How are you?

I thought this
meeting was secret.

So did I.

I can't believe this!

Sir? Your door's locked.

Robert, please.

Come on, come on,
it's him!

Go get it.

They're here for you, Robert!
Robert!

Mr. cutty, could we
get it right here, please?

Please, Mr. cutty!

Oh, nice!

Oh, nice!

Mr. cutty!

Why can't you people
just leave him alone?

You should know better,
Cindy.

Oh, please!

Who the hell
does cutty think he is,

standing us up like this?!

Preposterous. I thought we
were gonna get to meet cutty.

I'm wasting
my time here.

I gave up a board
meeting for this.

Obviously, someone
tipped off the press,

and he didn't
want to come through

that throng
of reporters.

Look if cutty can't even
show up for a meeting,

how the hell's he
gonna run a company?

You wanted Mr. cutty, he's here.

His ideas are right
in front of you.

His ideas are right
in front of you.

Well, thank you
very much, miss ayres.

I'm sure this'll make
for fascinating reading.

But frank is right...

Without cutty, I'm afraid I'm
gonna have to pass on this one.

I agree.
Me, too.

Garcon! My coat.

I tried.
My conscience is clear.

What?

I said to Robert,
"these are important men.

"Some of them are clients.

"We made promises.

We have a moral obligation
to these people."

We have a moral obligation
to these people."

Just a minute.

Just a minute. You--

You mean that
cutty wants--

Yes. He ran
the numbers...

And he wants to keep
syntonex to himself.

I'm sorry, darling.

I'm sorry.

This is bullshit.

Go ahead, you tell
Mr. Manchester

that you recommended
to Mr. fallon

not to go through
with this.

Mr. fallon,
I didn't say that.

What I said was--

Shut up. Shut up.

Just a minute.
Calm yourself.

I don't want to.
No, I don't want to.

All right.
Please, control yourself.

All right.
Please, control yourself.

I'm sorry.

Gentlemen, turn to page one.
Let's begin to read.

I'm so sorry.

It's all right.
It's all right.

Syntonex consolidated
financial state.

Page 2 is better.

Page 2.

Its consolidated financial
state, and consolidating--

Come on, bissel.
Move your ass!

Mr. fallon?
Mr. fallon!

What's the matter, frank,
trouble in paradise?

What's the matter, frank,
trouble in paradise?

What happened?
What happened?

What happened?

They went for it.
They went for it.

Yeah!

They went for it!
They went for it!

They went for it!
They went for it!

Come on,
I got a surprise.

Ok.

Oh, my god!
They went for it!

Ok, we all pitched in

and got a little
something, you know,

to show
our gratitude.

I hope Mr. cutty
smokes cigars.

Tell him thanks.

Tell Mr. cutty thanks
for saving our jobs.

I gotta tell you, this is my
favorite time of the year.

I gotta tell you, this is my
favorite time of the year.

When I was a kid,
every Christmas

my dad would
give me a railroad ticket.

One way?

No.

He'd buy
a ticket for him

and a ticket
for me,

and we'd get on the train
and just take trips.

One year,
we ended up in Cleveland,

and he managed
to make Cleveland wonderful.

You don't
do that anymore?

No.

He passed away,
so now I go,

I light a candle
every Christmas Eve, you know.

I light a candle
every Christmas Eve, you know.

That's a great story.

Thank you.

Think you can
handle another story?

Sure.

Robert cutty
doesn't exist.

No, you don't understand.

I made him up.
He's not real.

Oh, I've known that
for weeks.

What do you mean,
you've known that for--

What do you mean,
you've known for weeks?

Well, sure.

I mean, because
every idea cutty had,

it was already
in your files,

or I saw
you come up with it.

Why didn't you
say anything if you knew?

What, and stop getting all
those great presents?

No.

Besides, I loved it.

Besides, I loved it.

If you had to make
up a white male

in order for people to
recognize your talent,

then I thought, well,
it's my job to,

you know, keep
the illusion going

and support you.

Ha ha ha!

I cannot believe
that you knew

and didn't
say a word.

Yeah. Yeah, sure.

You are something else.

Oh. Thank you.

Listen, you know,
when I take over syntonex,

I'm gonna need somebody

to help me organize the
company and run it.

To help me organize the
company and run it.

You interested?

Are you serious?

Yes.

Yes?
Yes!

Is that a yes?

That's a nice
little yes dance. I see.

Oh, yeah!

I love the headline.

It's so
exquisitely cheap.

Oh, god.

If this doesn't
flush cutty out,

nothing will.

Know what? I think I know someone
who could help us along.

I thought you might.

I have a friend
at the s.E.C.

I have a friend
at the s.E.C.

I'm gonna have Eddie
on Laurel's tail

24 hours a day.

Incognito.

Great. Great.

Agent thompkins,
this is frank Peterson.

I'm sorry to
bother you at home,

but I thought
you might wanna hear

what's in
Cindy Mason's column

before it's published
in tomorrow morning's paper.

Good morning, Sally?

Be right there,
miss ayres!

Oh, great.

You know, you made me
feel so much better,

I had to go shopping.

I had to go shopping.

I had to go
shopping for you.

Merry Christmas.

Miss ayres, agent
thompkins of the s.E.C.

Is waiting
to meet Mr. cutty.

Agent thompkins?

How are you?
I'm Laurel ayres.

Pleased to meet you.
How can I help you?

Well, if it's not
too much trouble,

I'd like
to see Mr. cutty.

You and the rest
of the world.

Unfortunately,
he's not available,

but I will tell him
that you came by.

Wasn't aesop Franklin
your date

wasn't aesop Franklin
your date

for Donald fallon's
Thanksgiving party?

Yes, he was.
Is that illegal?

Well, I'm sure Mr. cutty can
explain everything when we meet

if you could see
that he gets this.

A judicial subpoena?

You're subpoenaing him

because I'm in a picture
with aesop Franklin?

Well, Mr. cutty's
the one

that profited personally
from the syntonex stock.

But he didn't
do anything illegal.

I'm sure that will
all be cleared up

when I meet
with him.

And if he
doesn't cooperate,

then I'm afraid
we'll have to

then I'm afraid
we'll have to

conduct a full-scale
investigation.

Happy holidays.

Well, this isn't even
close to rational.

I've gotta go see Charlie.
He's my only shot.

Well, this
is just an idea,

but what about if
you told the truth?

Are you crazy?

What do you mean,
tell the truth?

I committed fraud.
They're gonna put me in jail.

This is insane.

You know, if I had just been able
to close that syntonex deal,

everything
would've been fine.

I could've
gotten rid of cutty.

I could've
gotten rid of cutty.

Merry Christmas!
Ho ho ho!

Is Santa claus
following us?

Please, don't
get paranoid on me now.

I've got big fish
to fry here.

Come on.

He's following us.

This is crazy.

This is nuts.
Nuts. Nuts.

Not that door,
this one. Come on.

Hello, ladies.

Ok, what is it
this time?

Well, I need,
kind of, a new look.

Well, I need,
kind of, a new look.

Well, honey,
it's what I live for.

I hope so.

It's gotta be
distinguished,

rich, powerful,

old, and male.

Well, now it's
getting interesting.

And white.

White?

Yeah, he's
gotta be white.

Oh, shit.

I told you
this was crazy.

You got
a better idea?

I don't
think it's crazy.

Charlie can
work miracles.

Well, honey, I could sure
use a miracle right now.

Oh! I'm on.

Here, slip into Ethel.

Let a little sand
out of the tits.

Let a little sand
out of the tits.

I'll be back
in 10 minutes.

May I never get this old.

Hello, my name
is Robert cutty.

Lower your voice
just a few octaves.

Uh, hello, my name
is Robert cutty.

Deeper.

My name is
Robert cutty, and--

Deeper.

If I go any deeper, I'll be
talking out of my uterus.

Throw a little
male attitude in there.

Throw a little
male attitude in there.

My god. All right.

That's me, Bob cutty,

and I'm just
gonna take you

and bite your Booty
in the back of my truck.

I said male, not moron.

Done.

Is this gonna
fool the s.E.C.?

Wow. It's a miracle.

I never go on stage
with a new look

until I try it out
in public first.

Public?

In public.

Mr. cutty.

Mr. cutty.

Of course, he can expect the
best without any notice.

Confidentiality?

Madame, this
is the Plaza.

But what
about cutty?

He has to show up
for the s.E.C.

Fallon will
approach him there.

So you're sure
hewlett-packard is in?

H.P. Is in
if fallon is in.

Hold that!

Jacobson's gonna
tell him at dinner.

At the Plaza.

His favorite place.

Nice work, frank.

Charlotte, Mr. cutty
is on his way.

I want you to inspect
the royal suite personally.

I want you to inspect
the royal suite personally.

Simon, fresh flowers
all over the suite.

I don't care if you have to abduct
them from our other guests.

Jose, our best champagne and
caviar delivered at once.

Thomas, out front.
You wait for Mr. cutty only.

Now, everyone, go!

Wait.

The privacy of
our guests is sacred.

Get me Levy
at the business desk.

Randall, good
to see you.

Frank.

You remember Walter.

Randall.

Well, fallon's
meeting us

in the palm court.
Shall we?

Taxi! Taxi!

Camille, it's me, Tommy.

Guess who's
coming to town?

Miss Mason?
Frederick from the Plaza.

He is coming.

Hello, my name
is Robert cutty.

Mr. cutty?

That you,
Mr. cutty, sir?

Hello, I'm, uh,
I'm Robert cutty.

Well, can I get
your bags for you, sir?

I'm not gonna be here
long enough to need any.

Excuse me.

Mm-hmm. Got ya.

Yes, I did.

All the flowers
are in place?

The champagne, caviar,
all the appointments?

Can I get your coat
for you, Mr. cutty?!

Oh, thank you.

Oh, thank you.

Ah, Mr. cutty. Welcome
to the Plaza.

I'm Frederick
the manager.

We're so deeply
honored to have you.

And if there's anything
I can do for you

to make your stay more
pleasant, more comfortable,

please, please, don't hesitate
to call me personally.

I just want to
get to my room.

Oh, of course. Of course.
Everything is in order.

I personally have seen
to every amenity.

Hey, Tony.

You heard of
that guy cutty?

Guess what? He's here.

Cutty?

Robert cutty,
here?

Robert cutty,
here?

Maybe we could get
him to join us,

get this whole thing
finished tonight.

Frank?

Now, miss ayres...

Hmm?

Stipulated that all charges
be on her account.

Excuse me. I'm looking
for Robert cutty.

Well, cutty?

Robert cutty.

I'll find
my room myself.

Thomas. Thomas.

Maybe you can help me. I'm
looking for Robert cutty.

Please don't
hesitate to call me.

Mr. cutty?

Mr. cutty?

Sorry, sir. It's a
private elevator.

Mr. cutty?!

If everything isn't
satisfactory in your room,

sir, just call
bell hop Thomas.

The key. Thank you.

I won't say good night,

because I know you'll be
having a great night.

Hi.

Robert.

It's me. Camille.

It's me. Camille.

Camille.

Camille.

Oh, Camille.

How'd you
get in here?

Oh, let's just say
I bribed a bell hop.

Well, what
do you want?

You said you couldn't
wait to meet me.

Yes, I did, but--

Are you disappointed?
Oh, no. No. No.

But, surely, you
must be, my dear.

Not at all.

You're drop-dead gorgeous.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Whoa! Oh! Robert.

You're a genius.

All geniuses
are gorgeous.

You think
I'm a genius?

I knew it the moment
I saw the Van proposal.

You really knocked me off my
feet with the syntonex deal.

It was
luminous, insightful,

brilliant.

And those notes
you sent.

A woman waits all her life
looking for things like that.

I know.

Here, just
sit there.

Here, just
sit there.

Now, Camille--

Shh.

I don't, uh--
Robert?

No, Camille!
What're you doing?

Don't take off-ooh, Camille.
Ooh, Camille.

Oh, my goodness.

La Perla.

Ooh, you are
a man of the world.

I want you, Robert.

I want
your genius.

Fill me
with your genius.

No, Camille!

Aah! Aah! Camille!
Aah! Camille!

What's the matter?

Oh, golly.
Oh, Camille.

Oh, golly.
Oh, Camille.

Oh, I got
a charleyhorse.

Oh, here,
let me help you.

No. No! No!
Stop that!

Isn't that
what you want?

No, it isn't.

And it shouldn't be
what you want, either.

But-- you know, you're
an intelligent,

beautiful, smart woman.

You wanna get
ahead in business?

Use your brain.

Whoa.

No one's ever said anything
like that to me before.

Yeah, well,
I'm not surprised.

Oh, look,
I'm shaking.

Hold me.

No, I don't
want to hold you.

No, I don't
want to hold you.

Hold yourself.

Oh, Robert.

Look, Camille, it's not what's
down here that's important.

It's what's up here.

Think about it.

In the meantime,
get yourself together.

I'm very pleased that
you wanted to meet me.

What a man.

Listen, Thomas,

listen, Thomas,

I would really like
to do business with you,

but you're gonna
have to tell me

what room
Mr. cutty's in.

Is he with
anybody else?

I'm so sorry,
miss Mason,

but I'm not
at Liberty to say.

Oh, Mr. Frederick,
what room is he in?

Ha ha ha!

You mustn't ask
such questions.

Mr. cutty?

Mr. cutty!

That's confidential
information.

I mean, I'm not supposed
to tell you that.

Mr. cutty!

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god!

...if you know what
I'm sayin', so--

Mr. cutty, I--
Oh, shit.

Excuse me, Mr. cutty?

Sorry to bother you, but I'm frank
Peterson from Manchester investments,

and Walter Manchester and I
are having dinner tonight

with Donald fallon,

and, uh, well,
it's to discuss you--

Ahh! Gotta run.

Ah, hell.
You got me.

Mr. cutty, wait.

Ow! Shit!

Mr. cutty, I don't know what
Laurel ayres told you about me,

Mr. cutty, I don't know what
Laurel ayres told you about me,

but I have no--ow! Ow!
Ohh! Ooh!

Aah!

Where the hell
is the--

Mr. cutty! Mr. cutty!

Mr. cutty! Ooh! Ooh!
Ow!

Aah! Uhh!

Oh, my god! Oh, my...

Well, frank,
will you help me?!

My car. Just my car.
Leaving so soon?

Frank!

Stupid jerk! Cutty's
getting away!

Mr. cutty needs
his car right now!

Mr. cutty! Mr. cutty! Mr. cutty!

Mr. cutty!

Do you see him?

Get the bag!

Get in, get in!

From the frying pan,
into the fire!

Mr. cutty!
Mr. cutty, wait!

Mr. cutty!
Mr. cutty, wait!

Taxi, yo!

The press treats you
like a rock star.

How 'bout
a good cigar?

Thank you.

Actually, I was just on my
way to a business dinner

where you were going to be the
main topic of conversation.

Yes, I know. I ran into
frank Peterson in the head.

Can we talk
man to man?

Man to man.

That's it.
I like that.

Hewlett-packard wants to
stay involved with syntonex,

hewlett-packard wants to
stay involved with syntonex,

and Robert,
with you at the wheel,

they'd be damn fools
not to.

Syntonex is Laurel's baby.

If Laurel
wants a baby,

she can go find
a man and have one.

Oh, that...

Are you all right?

I suddenly got a very
bad taste in my mouth.

Is this Cuban?

Uh, no.
It's Dominican.

I don't smoke crap.

I don't smoke crap.

Oh.

I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry.

It won't happen
again.

I'm surprised you would even
give me something like that.

Listen, Robert,
frank has made a deal.

You get Laurel
to cooperate,

and they'll accept
a plea bargain.

She'll get a slap on
the wrist, probation,

lose her license.

You, old friend,

you'll be totally
in the clear.

That's a hell of a deal.

She'll be
well-compensated

and we'll end up
big winners.

And we'll end up
big winners.

Pull over.

Now, wait--wait,
wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

If you don't like
the deal, that's fine.

Just make the s.E.C.
Problem go away

and forget
the whole damn thing.

Nice to speak to you,
Mr. fallon.

No, wait--wait a minute!

Syntonex needs you,
Robert,

and you need us.

Now, you think
about that.

Next time,
they'll be Cubans!

Damn, damn, damn.

Looked like Brando
there for a minute.

All right, Mr. cutty,

what are you up to?

Go on, follow him.

Pull over!

Hold it, hold it!

All right, park it,
cabbie.

We're just gonna hang
out here for a while.

Oh, yeah, cutty,
you gonna die.

You are gonna die.

Doesn't
make any sense.

Ok, let me
get this straight.

You saw Laurel
go to the club,

but she never came back.

But she never came back.

I stayed until closing.

Cutty showed up
at the Plaza in her car

and you followed cutty
to Laurel's apartment.

He went in,
but he never came out.

I was out there
all night,

and after Laurel
left there this morning,

I knocked on the door
and nothing.

Huh? What?

What?

Nothing.

Nothing.

They obviously knew they
were being followed,

so they gave you
the slip.

Do you know what?

I say live
and let live.

I say live
and let live.

Merry Christmas.

To you, too,
you son of a bitch.

Ooh, I cannot
believe this.

Even when I create
the perfect man,

he ends up stabbing
me in the back.

Mm-hmm.

Do you want to
talk about this?

No, I don't want
to talk about it!

I'm gonna kill him.

Well, that's a good idea,

but there's one,
small problem.

What?

How are you gonna
kill someone

who doesn't exist?

Well, I don't know, but
I know he can't show up

in front of the s.E.C.
If he's dead.

That's good.

That's good.

...Cause
of the accident...

This is just the nicest
thing you've ever given me.

I'm large like that.
It's beautiful.

...Wreckage
of the craft

was found this morning
off the coast of Albania

with no signs of life.

Authorities fear the worst.

Oh, my god.

What?

Mr. cutty
was on that ship.

Oh, he was not.
Stop it.

He was.

Hello?

It was the ship.

It was the ship.

Of course. Of course!

Cutty and calimeras
are best friends!

And now he's dead.

Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh!
It's perfect!

Do you have
a black dress?

Yes.

Wear it, girl.

I will!

He was just
the most generous,

giving, loving man I ever
knew. Don't you think?

He was the best thing
that has ever happened to me

and I--I'm just so crushed
that he's...

Fish food at the bottom
of the ocean.

Fish food at the bottom
of the ocean.

Knowing that his body
will never be recovered.

They have rescued
everybody, um, on the yacht

and Mr. cutty wasn't
even on board.

Where was Mr. cutty?

Aah! It's a miracle!

You had
the watch inscribed?

Yeah.

"Dear Robert,
keep searching."

Who's Jane?

That's one of
those women he dumped

in his eternal search.

Ooh!

Got power.

Mr. cutty's
missing a foot.

Well, he had 2
when I dressed him.

You know what?
Forget about it.

They'll just figure it came
off in the explosion.

It'll be really realistic.

Um, speaking
of realism,

don't you think we
should remove this hook

that's sticking out
of the top of his head?

That's sticking out
of the top of his head?

You're standin' there.
Take it out.

Aah!

What?

Ohh! He moved!

Are you sure this is
the right thing to do?

The hook?

No. Getting rid
of Mr. cutty.

This is sort
of drastic.

No more drastic
than creating him.

Oh, I found it!

What?

Just throw it in there.

Just throw it in there.

Release the brake?

Pull the brake.

Brake!

Ha ha!

Good-bye, Mr. cutty.

Oh, god. Do you know
I'm gonna miss him?

Aah...

It didn't blow up.

What are we supposed
to do if it doesn't blow up?

I don't know.

Well, maybe we should
just leave it alone.

No, we can't
leave it alone.

How are we gonna
explain it?

Well, we can't
go down there,

so it's just--
It's resting.

No, no! Explosions
don't rest.

They either explode
or they don't.

See?

Oh.

Bye-bye.

You all right?

Yeah, I'm great now.

Whoo. It's a good thing

we don't do this
for a living.

Yeah, ain't it,
though?

All right, well...

Let's get ourselves
together,

get in the car,
and go home.

We came in that car.

I thought you were
supposed to be efficient.

I thought you were
supposed to be efficient.

I thought you would have had
this all figured out by now.

We blew up the damn car.

What do you want from me?!

We just blew up
the damn car.

Listen, listen, listen!

It's Christmas Eve.

The market is closing
in a half an hour.

There's nothing I can do.
You're gonna have to wait.

Here you go.
Thanks.

Whoo.

Laurel ayres?

Yeah. Who are you?

Police officers.

Something wrong?

You could say that.

Who are you? Hey!

Who are you? Hey!

You're under arrest for the
murder of Robert cutty.

What are you
talkin' about?!

You have the right
to remain silent...

Are you kidding?!
This is a joke.

What are you doing?!

Hey, hey! Watch my hair!

I just had it done. Hey!

If we could get this
settled kind of quick,

it's Christmas Eve.

I need to go light
a candle for my dad.

Oh, that's nice.

Well, starting
with the truth

usually saves a lot of time.
Do you mind?

No, please.

But I'm tellin' you
when I tell you this story,

you're gonna
just die laughing.

It's too much.

You ready?
Go.

I could not have
killed Robert cutty

I could not have
killed Robert cutty

because he doesn't exist.

I made him up.

Well,
if he doesn't exist,

then who's this
at the Plaza?

Ooh, that's me.

I'm dressed up
like Robert cutty,

and this is
a great picture.

Help me understand this.

First you pretended there
was a cutty. Right.

Then you pretended
to be a cutty.

Right. Then you
pretended to kill him?

Yeah. I mean,
he was takin'

all the credit
for everything.

You know, I saved
an entire company?

A whole company,

a whole company,

and you know
what they did?

They gave him
a box of cigars.

And you
resented that.

Absolutely.

So you felt
worthless.

Yes. Like you didn't exist.

You know what
I'm talkin' about.

And as long as cutty was around,
this wasn't gonna change.

That's right.
So you killed him.

I did!

Dead! Killed him,
blew him up in the car!

I mean, dead,
dead like a doornail.

Poof! He was gone.

And how did that
make you feel?

Ohh, good.
Like I knew that it would.

Thank you. Yes! Thank you, Ms.
Ayres.

Uh-uh, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.

Wait a second.

I've seen Kojak.

I've seen Kojak.

I know what
you just did. No.

I didn't kill the guy.

Look, all you gotta do
is call my secretary.

Her name's Sally dugan.

She will come down,
she will explain it all.

She was my accomplice.
Not my accomplice.

She was not my accomplice.

She's accomplished.
That's what I mean to say.

She was my helper in--

She--she can tell you
everything you need to know.

You'll see.

Sally dugan?
Yeah.

We'll do that.

Sally,
what happened?

Oh, they arrested me

in front of my whole family
at Christmas Eve dinner.

I guess they didn't
believe you, either, huh?

No, I'm an accomplice.

I'm really sorry.
I'm sorry.

It's not your fault.

No, it isn't.
It's cutty again.

Yeah.

You OK?

Yeah. I have to go
to the bathroom.

Isn't there a bathroom
we can go to?

Yeah, but did
you see it?

No.

Ooh, I couldn't.
Mm-mmm.

I couldn't.
Really?

Yeah. This could be
a very long wait.

Oh, my gosh.

Frank, I'm almost finished
with the tree.

Just a second.

Reeling in
the holiday spirit!

Reeling in
the holiday spirit!

Uh, just, uh, give me a
couple more minutes, here.

I've already unwrapped
your present...

And I'm getting cold.

Ok...

Just, uh, keep your
chestnuts roasting.

Santa's up here
making sure

it's gonna be a very
merry Christmas...

And an amazing
new year.

Ho ho ho.

Mr. Manchester! What can you
tell us about Mr. cutty?

Peterson will answer
all your questions.

All right, all right,
here it is.

Robert called me after that
commotion at the Plaza

to reschedule a meeting,

and on his way to that
meeting, he was carjacked.

Carjacked?
Was he robbed?

Yes, he was robbed.

His wallet, watch, jewelry,

everything was taken.

And then what,
Mr. Peterson?

I don't know if
there were witnesses.

Obviously, the carjacker
had enemies of his own.

And how is he now?

And how is he now?

Mr. cutty is fine.

He was
understandably shaken.

He was in fear for his life.

He wanted to get out
of New York,

so he called me

and we got on
the first plane to Europe.

All right, that's it!

This is Garrett findlay
for c.N.N.

Robert cutty is alive.

Apparently, the wall street
mystery man

was the victim
of a carjacking...

Ok, I'll call you.
All right.

The charges have been
dropped against you, too.

When'd you guys
figure out

we were tellin'
the truth?

You know that guy
you said didn't exist?

You know that guy
you said didn't exist?

Son of a bitch.

We also have
a sworn affidavit

from frank Peterson

stating that
cutty is alive and well

and on vacation
in the south of France.

I don't know.

For some reason,
I thought she'd be happy.

Laurel, please!

Please, Laurel,
don't do this to me.

It's been 3 days,
Laurel,

this is not healthy.

...At 5,114.

The s&p 500 index
is up over 2 points,

the s&p 500 index
is up over 2 points,

the nasdaq composite
is up over a half point.

Taking a look at some of
our top stories in business,

the s.E.C. Has cleared
Robert cutty

of all insider
trading charges.

This news has prompted
an announcement.

By Walter Manchester

that his company
and cutty's will now merge.

As expected, frank Peterson
has been named president...

Sally, on answering machine:
Laurel, it's Sally.

This is the 12th time
I have called you.

You've got to pick up
the phone and talk to me.

Everybody's
worried sick about you.

Everybody's
worried sick about you.

We're all worried.
You've got to stop this.

Just stop what
you're doing right now

and pick up the phone.

Pick--

The s.E.C.
Has also announced

that they have
suspended the license

of Laurel ayres,

Robert cutty's
former associate.

Officials say
an investigation--

We are talking to women,

expecting but abandoned

by wealthy
but elusive fathers.

By wealthy
but elusive fathers.

When's the baby due?

Late July.

Have you told Mr. cutty
that he's to be a father?

He won't return
my phone calls.

I love Robert cutty,

and all I want
is to meet with him...

And to talk about
the future of our son--

Our baby.

Talk about your
immaculate conception.

Excuse me, he won't
take your calls?

I don't care
if this cutty

is the richest guy
on wall street.

You take his ass
to court!

You sue his butt!
Am I right?

You sue his butt!
Am I right?

Laurel,
answer the door!

All right, Laurel,
I'm sorry,

but we're coming in.

I hate to do this,
but here it comes.

Thank you so much.
Thank you.

Laurel? Ok.

Laurel? I'll take it from here.

Thanks.
Thanks, honey.

Oh, my,
what a mess.

You crazy?

Go away.

Go away.

My gosh.

Look at this. You know,
your door's broken.

My, haven't you been busy.

Goodness sake.

Oh, you're driving
everybody crazy.

People are worried
sick about you.

Well, now I guess you can go back
and tell them that I'm fine.

I'm ensconced in
my own little world--

My couch, my TV,

and lots of people
who deliver food.

Now go away.

Oh, gosh, that's a
shame, you know,

to let them come
and take away

to let them come
and take away

this beautiful
building

that your dad worked
all his life for.

Oh, please, leave my
father out of this.

I bet you didn't
even bother to go

and light a candle for
him this year, did you?

Where were we
this year?

I think we were in jail,
were we not?

Well, you're
not in jail now.

Come on, get up and go
out and light a candle.

No. Come on, gonna get up,

gonna get dressed.
We're gonna go out.

Come on. Come on.
No.

No.
We're gonna get up,

don't fight.

Get up
and get dressed

and we can go out
and light a candle--

No. Go home.
Go home!

No. Go home.
Go home!

Oh, my gosh!

The first thing you're gonna
do is brush your teeth.

Thank you, Sally.

Thank you.

So, my friend,
what are we gonna do?

I'm going back home
and I'm going to bed.

No, I mean about
the future, you know.

Your future, my future.

Don't tie your future up
with mine, you know.

I'm done, you know.
Frank's got cutty--

Listen, you've got
to snap out of this.

Frank's got cutty.
So what? Good riddance!

He's a bunch of trouble.

Yeah, you're right.
Right!

Right. Oh, uh,
by the way,

um, you're gonna love this.
What?

The peabody club?
Mm?

They're making cutty
a member.

They're making cutty
a member.

Really?
Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

And they're voting him
businessman of the year--

As they should.

Yeah. Nobody else
had a year like cutty.

No,
that was my year.

Nobody had a year
like me.

I know. Should be
your name on that plaque.

Yeah, it should.

They're
probably gonna have

a big dinner
of some sort

with pressed chicken
and fruit cocktail.

And frank.

Yeah. Frank's gonna have to
accept the award for cutty.

Yeah. Frank's gonna have to
accept the award for cutty.

How is it possible?

I mean, he got my
promotion, he gets cutty,

he just--

You know, as long
as frank's got cutty,

he's got you.

Yeah. Because...

I am cutty.

You know what?

Yeah?

Call me.
I'm gonna call you.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.
Thank you.

Gentlemen,
good evening.

We're here tonight
to welcome

the peabody club's
newest member

and to honor him
with this year's

peabody businessman
of the year award.

Peabody businessman
of the year award.

Pardon me, ladies,
excuse me.

Pardon me.

Excuse us.

Pardon me, ladies.

I'm afraid, however,
I have some very bad news.

I've just received word

that Robert cutty

will not be with us
this evening.

It seems there's
a typhoon in Hong Kong,

so his plane
has been grounded.

So his plane
has been grounded.

But I spoke with Bob,

and, uh, I can't tell you
how disappointed he is.

He asked me to convey
his deepest regret,

and his Sincere
gratitude

for being welcomed into
this illustrious club,

and for this--this
prestigious award.

So, on behalf
of my close friend

and colleague
Robert cutty,

I'd like to humbly
accept this on his--

Mr. cutty's here.

No, he's not.
He's here.

No, he's not.
He's here.

No, he's not.
He's here.

I would like to
humbly accept this...

Cutty made it in.
He's here.

I don't believe it.

Yes! Very good. Hear!

You're not gonna
get away with this.

Watch me.

Donald, I see you're still
smoking those cheap cigars.

It's nice to
see you, Robert.

And you, Walter.

My new partner-- no,
frank, don't go anywhere.

I like it
when you're close.

Without you I wouldn't
be here tonight.

You know, gentlemen, I
managed to rent the concorde

and I beat out
that damn typhoon.

You know, on one hand,
there's something wonderful

you know, on one hand,
there's something wonderful

about being accepted
into an exclusive club.

It makes a man feel,
well, damn good.

Damn good.

You didn't know
a damn thing about me,

but you accepted me
as one of your own,

which I find amazing.

You let my work speak for itself
and look what's happened:

You've made me
businessman of the year.

But in the words
of Groucho Marx,

but in the words
of Groucho Marx,

"I don't want to be
part of a club

that would have me
as a member."

And we've got to encourage
our young people,

which is why I want
to share this award

with the young man
standing to my left

for his hard work.

He's been
an inspiration to me.

I really owe it all to him.

Take a bow.

Woof!

Holy shit!

Figures.

You know, gentlemen...

There's something
about exclusivity.

You know the word exclusive
means "to exclude."

You know the word exclusive
means "to exclude."

And I thought that would be
the case with me.

So I played by the rules.

I worked really hard.

I was very, very honest.

But I knew that I didn't
have the right image

to be accepted
into this club,

and that chances were I would
never have the right image.

Image is a funny thing...

Because underneath
the right image...

Because underneath
the right image...

Could be the wrong one.

And underneath
the wrong image...

You may just find
the real Robert cutty.

Far out.

Possibly the man
who's serving you coffee

or offering you a cigar.

Or it could be
a busboy or your waiter,

or it could be
a busboy or your waiter,

you just never know.

And gentlemen,
I want to congratulate you

for inducting into
the peabody club

your first woman member.

Yes!
Yes, yes, yes!

All right,
all right.

Thank you very much.

All right, Laurel!

All right, Laurel!

Yeah!

Next week we'll do lunch.
I'd like that.

Ha ha ha ha! Laurel,
you were fabulous!

Atta girl!
You did it!

♪ What I need, what I need
is to change my situation ♪

♪ Find a new direction ♪

♪ All that I need
and to hold my head high ♪

♪ It's all that I need
and reach for the sky ♪

♪ That's all that I need
and I-i-i-i ♪

♪ I, it's all
that I need... ♪

♪ I, it's all
that I need... ♪

I used to think
that doing business

meant, uh...

Being insensitive, cruel.

Why is it men always hurt
the ones the love the most?

Anyway, I've done
a lot of soul searching.

I feel reborn.

Uh, liberated.

I've really gotten in touch
with my feminine side,

and I feel...

Ready to change

ready to change

into the kind of
caring,

feeling executive you
want for this company.

I humbly ask for the chance
to prove that to you.

That's really wonderful.

It's remarkable

how people can change.

However...

Knowing my associate
as I do,

knowing my associate
as I do,

I'm afraid it would
really piss her off.

♪ Hey-ey! ♪

♪ Because I believe ♪

♪ That's all that we need ♪

♪ Is to stand together ♪

♪ It's all that we need ♪

♪ And I-i-i-i ♪

♪ I'll be all that I need ♪

♪ I'll be all that I need ♪

♪ What I need, what I need
is strength that you give me ♪

♪ Helped me see
completely ♪

♪ Opened my eyes ♪

♪ What I need, you and me,
we can learn from each other ♪

♪ Take part in one another ♪

♪ In building our dreams ♪

♪ Because I believe
that's all that we need ♪

♪ To stand together
is all that we need ♪

♪ And pride ♪

♪ Pride is all that we need ♪

♪ Pride is all that we need ♪

♪ And a little trust
is all that we need ♪

♪ And faith in us ♪

♪ Is all that we need ♪

♪ And I know love, love ♪

♪ Love... ♪

♪ Love is all
that we need ♪

♪ So many times playing
someone else's game ♪

♪ It's time the game
has changed ♪

♪ Heh heh ♪

♪ This time
I make the rules ♪

♪ I won't be nobody's fool ♪

♪ Ain't no one
can hold me down this time ♪

♪ This time ♪

♪ This world's
gonna be mine ♪

♪ This world's
gonna be mine ♪

♪ There's a brand-new
strength I've found ♪

♪ Now I ain't
looking back ♪

♪ Ain't backing down ♪

♪ And if the river's
too wide ♪

♪ I'll get through it ♪

♪ And if the mountain's
too high ♪

♪ That won't stop
this dream of mine ♪

♪ I'm on my way ♪
♪ I'm on my way ♪

♪ I've got a plan ♪

♪ I'm making my way
any way that I can ♪

♪ I'm making my way
any way that I can ♪

♪ River's too wide ♪

♪ Mountain's too high ♪

♪ I'm on my way,
I've got a plan ♪

♪ I'm making my way
any way that I can ♪

♪ If the river's too wide
I'll get through it ♪

♪ Af the mountain's
too high ♪

♪ That won't stop
this dream of mine ♪

♪ That won't stop
this dream of mine ♪

♪ I'm on my way ♪
♪ I'm on my way ♪

♪ I've got a plan ♪
♪ I've got a plan ♪

♪ I'm making my way
any way that I can ♪

♪ And if the river's too wide
I'll get through it ♪

♪ And if the mountain's
too high ♪

♪ That won't stop
this dream of mine ♪

♪ I'm on my way ♪
♪ I'm on my way ♪

♪ I've got a plan ♪

♪ I'm making my way
any way that I can ♪

♪ I'm making my way
any way that I can ♪

♪ Oh-ohh-oh ♪

♪ Keep hope alive ♪

♪ And you,
then you will realize ♪

♪ It's true ♪

♪ Everything in me
is coming through ♪

♪ For you ♪

♪ Keep hope alive in you ♪

♪ Keep hope alive in you ♪

♪ Then you will realize
it's true ♪

♪ God is blessing you ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ If you just keep
hope alive ♪

♪ If you just keep
hope alive ♪

♪ Today in your life ♪

♪ Today in your life ♪

♪ All you got to do ♪

♪ Is open your heart,
yeah ♪

♪ Keep hope alive ♪

♪ And you,
you will realize ♪

♪ It's true ♪

♪ Everything in me
is coming through ♪

♪ For you ♪

♪ Keep hope alive ♪

♪ Keep hope alive ♪

♪ And you, you will realize ♪

♪ It's true ♪

♪ Everything in me ♪

♪ Is coming through ♪

♪ For you,
keep hope alive... ♪

I'm gonna perpetrate
a great big whammy.

♪ Amen ♪

Ooh, yeah.