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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,467 You can't ignore me forever, Sebas. 2 00:00:08,551 --> 00:00:09,431 Smile! 3 00:00:11,679 --> 00:00:15,019 -At least let me explain. -Facing each other, please. 4 00:00:16,142 --> 00:00:19,352 Will that change the fact that you ruined our relationship 5 00:00:19,437 --> 00:00:22,607 and that you're also ruining my only chance to revive my career? 6 00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:24,685 Choke him, please. 7 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:27,986 -Adán called me. -And you accepted. 8 00:00:28,070 --> 00:00:31,030 Yes, because I need to talk to you, not to bother you. 9 00:00:31,615 --> 00:00:34,075 Intentions don't matter. 10 00:00:34,160 --> 00:00:35,540 I want to help you. 11 00:00:37,121 --> 00:00:40,541 If you want to help, you should be loyal. 12 00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:42,794 Fine, fine. I understand. 13 00:00:42,877 --> 00:00:45,417 -Now, please, let me talk. -Raise the weapons. 14 00:00:47,590 --> 00:00:51,050 Please leave me alone on the only week I don't have to see you. 15 00:00:51,135 --> 00:00:52,335 Show your weapons. 16 00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:58,345 I feel terrible too, Sebas. Let me talk to you, okay? 17 00:00:58,434 --> 00:00:59,394 Foot up and kiss. 18 00:01:00,311 --> 00:01:02,441 I won't talk to you until they yell "action." 19 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:04,574 Goodbye, Lucía. 20 00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:11,025 HOW TO SURVIVE BEING SINGLE 21 00:01:11,113 --> 00:01:14,033 This is a huge cake for a big-ass bachelor's party. 22 00:01:15,701 --> 00:01:17,241 Okay! 23 00:01:17,328 --> 00:01:18,868 Lord Boobies. 24 00:01:18,954 --> 00:01:23,174 I finished his Tinder profile. I said he's a vegan. 25 00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,880 -Cool, women are into that. -They love it. 26 00:01:25,961 --> 00:01:29,671 Tinder is crap. You can't connect through an algorithm. 27 00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:33,637 Relax, Fabiana. Not everybody likes to pick up dates at libraries. 28 00:01:33,719 --> 00:01:36,349 Of course, you'd have to know how to read. 29 00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:38,220 Mafer, where should I put this? 30 00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:40,477 I told you 20 times. On the table. 31 00:01:40,559 --> 00:01:42,649 Kids, concentrate. 32 00:01:42,728 --> 00:01:46,068 I devoted eight hours to this for Sebastián to get over Lucía. 33 00:01:46,148 --> 00:01:47,648 Don't worry about him. 34 00:01:47,733 --> 00:01:51,243 After tonight, he'll be too busy to think about Lucía. 35 00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:52,660 Why? 36 00:01:53,531 --> 00:01:54,571 He'll be fucking a lot! 37 00:01:55,741 --> 00:01:59,501 -It's ready. -Hey, the cake goes on that table. 38 00:01:59,578 --> 00:02:02,328 There are nine tables, sorry. Okay? 39 00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:05,790 -What's up? Are you ready? -Yes. 40 00:02:05,876 --> 00:02:07,246 Everyone knows what to do? 41 00:02:07,336 --> 00:02:08,546 -Obviously. -Yes. 42 00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:11,419 If you won't do this for Sebastián, just do it for me. 43 00:02:11,882 --> 00:02:14,592 -Why for you? -If something hurts him, it kills me. 44 00:02:14,677 --> 00:02:15,967 Really? 45 00:02:16,679 --> 00:02:18,309 I don't see what's so funny. 46 00:02:19,765 --> 00:02:22,975 These are cool. Hold them from the bottom. 47 00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:25,690 No, Lorenza. I don't know why you allowed it. 48 00:02:25,771 --> 00:02:28,071 You're my manager, why did you accept? 49 00:02:28,190 --> 00:02:30,940 -Sur--! -Listen up, I'll make it quick. 50 00:02:31,026 --> 00:02:34,946 This is my opportunity. No! You don't get it. I don't care, bye. 51 00:02:35,030 --> 00:02:36,950 Surprise! 52 00:02:38,242 --> 00:02:39,542 What's going on? 53 00:02:39,577 --> 00:02:42,247 Welcome to your re-bachelor party. 54 00:02:42,329 --> 00:02:44,669 -Okay. -For your new life, dude. 55 00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:50,376 Come on! 56 00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:55,844 What the fuck, man? 57 00:02:55,926 --> 00:02:58,096 -Come on, Fabiana! -Sorry. 58 00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,888 You nearly killed him, you can't pull these pranks. 59 00:03:00,973 --> 00:03:03,483 -I didn't buy the confetti. -Holy shit, Fabiana. 60 00:03:03,559 --> 00:03:06,599 -Are you okay? -Besides getting hit by confetti, 61 00:03:06,687 --> 00:03:08,267 Lucía is trying to ruin my life. 62 00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:11,815 She had the main actress fired so she could get the part. 63 00:03:11,901 --> 00:03:14,111 I can't believe that bitch. Eat something. 64 00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:16,954 Relax, I don't think she did it on purpose. 65 00:03:17,031 --> 00:03:20,531 In any case, your life has to go on. 66 00:03:20,618 --> 00:03:22,448 What would you do in my shoes? 67 00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:25,656 Me? I would work on myself, go to therapy. 68 00:03:25,748 --> 00:03:29,538 Ask my inner child, "What's wrong, why are you crying?" 69 00:03:29,627 --> 00:03:31,797 The important thing is that you're single. 70 00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:34,419 That means less crying and more fucking. 71 00:03:34,506 --> 00:03:36,796 -Check it out. -Are you serious? 72 00:03:36,884 --> 00:03:40,014 -A Tinder account in my name? -Yes, this is for you. 73 00:03:40,095 --> 00:03:43,135 It was hard work, we invested in it. Enjoy it. 74 00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:46,193 -Eight hours. -You look good in that photo, dude. 75 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,727 You guys are shitting me. Where did you get these? 76 00:03:49,813 --> 00:03:51,523 They're from my old portfolio. 77 00:03:51,607 --> 00:03:53,977 Your best time, you look great. 78 00:03:54,068 --> 00:03:55,188 You look perfect. 79 00:03:55,277 --> 00:03:58,777 We analyzed a bunch of profiles and those are the best options. 80 00:03:58,864 --> 00:04:01,454 The best. And only two who matched. 81 00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:02,953 You have a new message, man. 82 00:04:03,035 --> 00:04:04,235 It's from Beatriz. 83 00:04:04,328 --> 00:04:07,248 If Beatriz wrote, the other one will too. That's how it works. 84 00:04:07,331 --> 00:04:08,671 How do you know, Daniel? 85 00:04:09,208 --> 00:04:10,418 I heard. 86 00:04:10,501 --> 00:04:12,131 The other girl will message you. 87 00:04:19,969 --> 00:04:22,969 -Beatriz wrote to you. -Yeah, that's good for starters. 88 00:04:23,055 --> 00:04:25,175 I'm not ready for this, I'm not in the mood. 89 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:29,225 You have to use technology. Nowadays, hooking up is a cinch. 90 00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:34,151 Once I got a girl, and all I had to do was send her an eggplant and unicorn emoji. 91 00:04:34,233 --> 00:04:36,193 We didn't exchange any words. 92 00:04:37,194 --> 00:04:39,034 -This is the future, man! -And... 93 00:04:39,113 --> 00:04:42,163 Don't waste your matches, you never know when it's the last one. 94 00:04:42,241 --> 00:04:44,581 You have to go out and forget about Lucía. 95 00:04:46,704 --> 00:04:48,964 Okay. Okay, right. 96 00:04:49,039 --> 00:04:49,959 On one condition. 97 00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:52,791 That you go with me. I'm not going alone. 98 00:04:52,876 --> 00:04:55,876 Don't be stupid, you're acting like a child. 99 00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:58,843 You're Sebastián Ybarra, international movie star. 100 00:04:58,924 --> 00:05:00,264 Believe it, dude! 101 00:05:00,342 --> 00:05:03,222 Wait a minute. We could all go out... 102 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:06,223 -but not together. -Yeah! 103 00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:10,436 You and Mafer will get a migraine and cancel at the last minute. 104 00:05:10,519 --> 00:05:12,479 Listen, buddies. Attention. 105 00:05:13,063 --> 00:05:16,363 We're all going together in support of our buddy Sebi who needs us. 106 00:05:16,442 --> 00:05:19,862 Should I write, send an emoji? 107 00:05:19,945 --> 00:05:22,735 -Send the dick pic now or...? -No! 108 00:05:23,282 --> 00:05:24,702 Calm down, champ. 109 00:05:24,783 --> 00:05:28,373 The only important thing here, the golden rule is, don't talk about your ex. 110 00:05:31,623 --> 00:05:33,133 Never talk about my ex. 111 00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:37,299 It's my first date since I broke up with my ex. 112 00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:43,930 Is this the first time you've gone out through Tinder? 113 00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:47,261 Forget Tinder, this is the first time I've gone out, period. 114 00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:49,765 My friends opened my account. 115 00:05:52,644 --> 00:05:54,524 Sorry for interrupting. 116 00:05:54,605 --> 00:05:59,025 I know that you're having dinner, but this crazy chick wants a photo with Teo. 117 00:05:59,109 --> 00:06:00,569 -Will you take it? -Sure. 118 00:06:00,652 --> 00:06:03,322 Make sure it's a good photo, for my FB page. 119 00:06:03,405 --> 00:06:04,945 Okay. 120 00:06:05,032 --> 00:06:06,282 Smile. 121 00:06:11,163 --> 00:06:13,123 Thank you, darling. 122 00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:17,915 Imagine what I'm going to do with this picture. 123 00:06:20,130 --> 00:06:23,260 Bon appétit, have a good time. 124 00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:33,233 What's up? How did it go? Is he nervous? 125 00:06:33,310 --> 00:06:38,520 I can't believe you're buddies with the poor, broken-hearted Teo from Dumped. 126 00:06:38,607 --> 00:06:40,227 You should have said so before. 127 00:06:40,317 --> 00:06:42,947 He's been my best friend since we were little. 128 00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:47,068 Yes, but I didn't believe you, dear. At all. 129 00:06:47,157 --> 00:06:51,867 For me, a glass of champagne and a diet soda as a chaser. 130 00:06:51,954 --> 00:06:53,964 And for you? 131 00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:56,879 I... A glass of water, please. 132 00:06:58,001 --> 00:07:01,841 -Are you famous or something? -No. She thought I was someone else. 133 00:07:05,926 --> 00:07:08,136 -What are you searching for? -Nothing. 134 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:14,271 Maybe we can continue our dinner without our phones. 135 00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:17,811 People think that phones connect, but they actually disconnect us. 136 00:07:17,896 --> 00:07:19,396 Teo, from Dumped. 137 00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:22,533 "She cheated. Sebastián Ybarra loses it at the premiere." 138 00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:23,819 That's fake news. 139 00:07:23,902 --> 00:07:26,662 Should I believe you or the six million views? 140 00:07:26,738 --> 00:07:31,288 If you don't mind, I'd like you to respect my privacy and my past. 141 00:07:31,702 --> 00:07:32,912 Let's talk about... 142 00:07:33,704 --> 00:07:34,914 About us. 143 00:07:35,664 --> 00:07:36,964 There is no "us." 144 00:07:38,584 --> 00:07:40,004 Are you a YouTuber? 145 00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:44,920 Good evening. Table for two? 146 00:07:45,007 --> 00:07:47,297 -Yes, thank you. -Follow me. 147 00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:50,304 I don't drink because I work out early every morning. 148 00:07:50,387 --> 00:07:51,807 Please, come in. 149 00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:53,389 Yo, bitch! 150 00:07:54,057 --> 00:07:55,347 Thought we wouldn't come? 151 00:07:55,434 --> 00:07:57,274 We go out on Tuesdays too, Fish. 152 00:07:57,352 --> 00:08:01,272 -Who's this? -Two very good friends. 153 00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:04,106 This is Melodi, we met on DrugWags.net. 154 00:08:04,193 --> 00:08:05,653 -Hi. -What's up? 155 00:08:05,736 --> 00:08:07,816 Oh, that's great. 156 00:08:08,447 --> 00:08:09,447 Yeah. 157 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:12,700 -Fish! -Coming. 158 00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:15,704 Yes. I'm going. See you later, I'm going with her. 159 00:08:15,787 --> 00:08:18,327 I'm glad you came to have fun on a Tuesday. 160 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:21,125 -Fish! -Coming, coming! 161 00:08:21,210 --> 00:08:23,840 -A bottle of tequila. -Daniel, a bottle? 162 00:08:23,921 --> 00:08:25,921 Are we boring people? 163 00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:28,586 No. I can't believe they thought we wouldn't come. 164 00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:31,385 -Are we really like that? -No. 165 00:08:32,262 --> 00:08:33,932 -Cheers, love. -Cheers. 166 00:08:36,433 --> 00:08:38,523 So they stop saying that we get migraines. 167 00:08:38,602 --> 00:08:39,942 Damn them. 168 00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,810 -Hey, Lina. -Hello. 169 00:08:41,897 --> 00:08:43,817 -Is my table ready? -Sure, Gon. 170 00:08:43,899 --> 00:08:45,609 -Thanks. -Welcome to the Arango. 171 00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:49,612 This is my spot. It's very low-key, but they have the best tapas, 172 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,776 and the chef is a close friend of mine. 173 00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:55,703 See? They know what I like. 174 00:08:56,703 --> 00:08:59,463 And any minute now... 175 00:09:02,084 --> 00:09:04,174 Like a Swiss watch, damn it. 176 00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:08,797 Try it, enjoy it, savor it. You're in heaven, Francesca. 177 00:09:09,299 --> 00:09:13,509 You may take photos. Just don't tag me because I'm an extremely private person. 178 00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:15,144 Well, I'm an actor. 179 00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:17,555 -Really? -Yes. 180 00:09:18,725 --> 00:09:21,435 -Can I ask you a question? -Sure, sure. 181 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:22,770 Is it hard to cry on cue? 182 00:09:23,355 --> 00:09:25,435 -Not that hard. -Come on, cry. 183 00:09:27,401 --> 00:09:29,781 It's not that easy either. It's like... 184 00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:35,201 It's an acting process, you have to think of something emotional, 185 00:09:35,284 --> 00:09:37,874 something that makes you think of... 186 00:09:40,372 --> 00:09:44,542 Like my whore of an ex who fucked a guy on a balcony. 187 00:09:44,626 --> 00:09:46,036 Let's talk about something else. 188 00:09:46,128 --> 00:09:47,878 No, don't worry. I'm fine. 189 00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:53,140 But she wasn't fine. If she'd been fine, she wouldn't have fucked a dude on a balcony. 190 00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:55,218 Maybe you didn't listen to her. 191 00:09:55,304 --> 00:09:56,514 It did hurt me. 192 00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,984 Because I love her, you know? 193 00:10:00,559 --> 00:10:02,389 I used to love her. I did. 194 00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:04,774 But I also hate her. 195 00:10:04,855 --> 00:10:07,605 I hate her. And I don't know if I'll ever forgive her. 196 00:10:08,150 --> 00:10:11,610 Use all those feelings... to cry. 197 00:10:13,989 --> 00:10:16,279 It's a great place, right? 198 00:10:18,243 --> 00:10:19,373 Welcome. 199 00:10:19,453 --> 00:10:22,543 Do you have a table closer to that side? 200 00:10:23,457 --> 00:10:24,827 They're all reserved. 201 00:10:25,375 --> 00:10:27,285 -Fabiana? -Hey. 202 00:10:27,377 --> 00:10:28,917 It's been so long. 203 00:10:30,213 --> 00:10:31,633 You look great without braces. 204 00:10:32,174 --> 00:10:34,844 How rude of me. I'm Gonzalo Torres, this is Francesca. 205 00:10:34,926 --> 00:10:36,256 -My pleasure. -Likewise. 206 00:10:36,887 --> 00:10:38,847 I'm Professor Berberto Strung. 207 00:10:38,930 --> 00:10:42,430 -It's a pleasure, professor. -Will you join us for an appetizer? 208 00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:44,517 No, they want to be alone. 209 00:10:44,603 --> 00:10:49,073 Maybe we can join you later, professor. Thank you. 210 00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:50,149 Please. 211 00:10:51,610 --> 00:10:53,450 What a gentleman! 212 00:10:56,615 --> 00:10:58,115 -Don't start, creep. -Okay. 213 00:11:09,920 --> 00:11:10,750 Hey, Mafer. 214 00:11:11,463 --> 00:11:13,343 -Can I tell you something? -Go ahead. 215 00:11:13,423 --> 00:11:14,423 Something. 216 00:11:15,133 --> 00:11:16,433 You're wasted. 217 00:11:16,510 --> 00:11:18,550 Seriously now. 218 00:11:18,637 --> 00:11:22,557 We can't turn into Sebastián and Lucía... 219 00:11:22,641 --> 00:11:24,231 No. I swear, we won't. 220 00:11:24,309 --> 00:11:26,139 I swear. 221 00:11:26,228 --> 00:11:31,018 I can't turn into Lucía, and you can't turn into Sebastián. 222 00:11:31,108 --> 00:11:32,528 -That's-- -Hey. 223 00:11:33,610 --> 00:11:35,820 Are you okay? Totally wasted. 224 00:11:35,904 --> 00:11:38,914 Fuck, yeah, so they don't think we're boring. Team "Dafer." 225 00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:40,080 Fuckers. 226 00:11:40,784 --> 00:11:42,204 Okay. 227 00:11:42,285 --> 00:11:45,865 Quick. I said I was going to the bathroom, she'll think I took a dump. 228 00:11:45,956 --> 00:11:50,246 One, she tried to make me cry. Two, I keep talking about Lucía. 229 00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:51,705 It's been like that all night. 230 00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:52,995 Sebas, listen. 231 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:55,880 Beatriz is your amuse-bouche. 232 00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:59,636 She's here to rinse from your lips the bitter taste of Lucía. 233 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:03,059 -What is that? -You have to be firm, 234 00:12:03,140 --> 00:12:04,980 don't show any weakness. 235 00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:06,688 On the contrary. 236 00:12:06,768 --> 00:12:11,518 Show that you're vulnerable, that you're in a totally screwed-up situation. 237 00:12:12,023 --> 00:12:17,783 We women love men who are in touch with their feelings. 238 00:12:17,863 --> 00:12:19,613 Okay, okay. 239 00:12:19,698 --> 00:12:21,448 Okay. 240 00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:22,873 Just a minute. 241 00:12:23,285 --> 00:12:25,035 Vulnerability... 242 00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:27,040 without weakness. 243 00:12:27,122 --> 00:12:29,252 -Yes, yes! -Okay. 244 00:12:29,332 --> 00:12:30,832 That's my champ! 245 00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:39,011 What's up, professor? 246 00:12:40,135 --> 00:12:41,635 -Go ahead. -After you. 247 00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:43,100 No. 248 00:12:43,180 --> 00:12:44,430 After you. 249 00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:48,976 So what, are you dating Fabiana? 250 00:12:49,060 --> 00:12:50,850 Yes, she's a smart young woman. 251 00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:53,267 Exactly. She's kind of young for you. 252 00:12:53,356 --> 00:12:54,976 Intellect has no age. 253 00:12:55,066 --> 00:12:57,606 I bet you're married. 254 00:12:58,195 --> 00:12:59,105 I'm a widower. 255 00:13:00,864 --> 00:13:02,124 Sorry, I apologize. 256 00:13:02,199 --> 00:13:04,239 -Any other questions? -No. 257 00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:06,243 Well... 258 00:13:10,749 --> 00:13:12,169 We started off on the wrong foot. 259 00:13:12,626 --> 00:13:15,126 I was vulnerable, that's all. 260 00:13:15,629 --> 00:13:17,259 But I'd really like to get to know you. 261 00:13:17,339 --> 00:13:20,339 Your profile said you're a chocolatier. Want to order dessert? 262 00:13:20,842 --> 00:13:22,932 That means I make chocolate. 263 00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:25,100 Of course, of course. 264 00:13:25,180 --> 00:13:27,640 I own a brand of organic cocoa. 265 00:13:27,724 --> 00:13:29,524 A fair-trade crop. 266 00:13:30,227 --> 00:13:33,517 Give me your link to put on my social media and we can promote it. 267 00:13:35,023 --> 00:13:36,023 No. 268 00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:42,198 -Are you really on Tinder? -Constantly. 269 00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:44,740 Aren't we, like, on a date? You and me? 270 00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:47,544 Yeah. But nowadays we can't waste time. 271 00:13:47,619 --> 00:13:48,789 Besides, you won't cry. 272 00:13:48,870 --> 00:13:50,120 Make me some chocolate. 273 00:13:56,545 --> 00:13:57,455 Will you cry now? 274 00:13:57,546 --> 00:14:00,756 -Why do you insist? -Because you're an actor. 275 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:02,300 I didn't choose to be hurt. 276 00:14:02,384 --> 00:14:06,184 Lucía had a thousand ways to tell me that she was done 277 00:14:06,263 --> 00:14:08,223 and she chose the lamest. 278 00:14:11,142 --> 00:14:12,352 Damn it. 279 00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:15,395 I thought you were gonna cry this time. 280 00:14:17,899 --> 00:14:20,529 Well... I'll be right back. 281 00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:28,450 I've come to the conclusion 282 00:14:28,535 --> 00:14:31,955 that every human relationship is subjective. 283 00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:33,788 Nobody hurts or is hurt. 284 00:14:34,583 --> 00:14:37,543 We are all simply intoxicated by our egos, 285 00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:39,047 which block us from loving... 286 00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:42,469 -selflessly and periodically... -Selflessly and periodically... 287 00:14:42,549 --> 00:14:45,589 -in the brief times of love. -in the brief times of love. 288 00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:50,640 -To me, you are... -Say it. 289 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:56,400 I don't know, you're like the Plato of human relationships. 290 00:15:05,530 --> 00:15:07,700 The girl is on Tinder. This isn't working. 291 00:15:07,782 --> 00:15:09,372 It's the story of my life. 292 00:15:09,451 --> 00:15:11,411 Don't let her intimidate you, darling. 293 00:15:11,494 --> 00:15:15,214 We women like dudes who dominate us. 294 00:15:15,290 --> 00:15:19,460 -That's right, bro. -Who make us sweat in passion. 295 00:15:20,170 --> 00:15:24,380 Seduce her like a real "macho" and she'll fall for you, I bet my mother! 296 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:29,009 That's what I was about to say. 297 00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:32,675 -Then I have to dominate her. -Dominate her. 298 00:15:32,766 --> 00:15:35,806 -Seduction... with passion. -With passion. 299 00:15:36,561 --> 00:15:38,311 Yeah! Yeah. 300 00:15:38,396 --> 00:15:39,646 Do it, honey. 301 00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,954 We can keep talking if you want. 302 00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:51,909 Hello, chick. 303 00:15:53,036 --> 00:15:54,286 You know what the problem is? 304 00:15:54,371 --> 00:15:56,331 We're repressing sexual tension. 305 00:15:57,165 --> 00:15:58,575 -Sexual tension? -Fuck, yeah. 306 00:16:00,001 --> 00:16:04,671 No. I literally don't feel it. 307 00:16:04,756 --> 00:16:06,256 I'm going to turn you on. 308 00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,221 Okay. 309 00:16:08,301 --> 00:16:10,801 Whatever you snorted, I want some too. 310 00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:13,767 I'm going to give you takeout, cowgirl. 311 00:16:15,642 --> 00:16:16,392 Cowgirl? 312 00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:18,725 Okay, okay. 313 00:16:19,312 --> 00:16:23,022 Now it's me who needs the restroom. Excuse me. 314 00:16:29,864 --> 00:16:35,334 Why do some people lose the flame in their relationship? 315 00:16:36,454 --> 00:16:39,874 I don't know, but the worst part is when they run out of wax. 316 00:16:39,958 --> 00:16:43,418 Because then, how can you relight that flame? 317 00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:48,966 Why is the obsession with the flame and not the wax? 318 00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:50,010 I don't know, but... 319 00:16:50,719 --> 00:16:53,809 people like us, who work on the wax, 320 00:16:53,888 --> 00:16:56,218 don't get their flame blown out. 321 00:16:58,393 --> 00:16:59,643 No way. 322 00:17:00,228 --> 00:17:01,808 Our flame blew out, Daniel. 323 00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:05,283 Do you have a lighter? 324 00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,068 No. Do you? 325 00:17:07,152 --> 00:17:08,112 No. 326 00:17:09,112 --> 00:17:10,412 Too bad. 327 00:17:18,121 --> 00:17:19,121 What? 328 00:17:19,205 --> 00:17:21,285 No, just-- You don't understand anything. 329 00:17:21,374 --> 00:17:23,924 It was only an analogy. 330 00:17:24,002 --> 00:17:27,922 If wax is the base and passion is the flame, 331 00:17:28,006 --> 00:17:29,416 the lighter is desire. 332 00:17:29,507 --> 00:17:31,627 What happens when there's no desire? 333 00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:34,511 I don't get it. 334 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:38,426 I feel like we're in limbo. 335 00:17:38,516 --> 00:17:41,226 We've lived together for some time, 336 00:17:41,311 --> 00:17:43,311 but we're not married. 337 00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:47,026 I think we've become comfortable, accustomed and lazy. 338 00:17:47,525 --> 00:17:51,645 And we're letting more and more time go by in an impasse. 339 00:17:51,738 --> 00:17:54,778 Mafer, we have to give it time. 340 00:17:56,659 --> 00:17:57,489 Give it time? 341 00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:11,423 Listen, he only wants to fuck you. 342 00:18:14,344 --> 00:18:16,604 Thanks for the news. Me too. 343 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:19,640 He's using you. 344 00:18:21,226 --> 00:18:24,016 Please don't ruin my date. 345 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:25,653 I'm just trying to help. 346 00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:29,152 Shit. Thanks for helping me, "Dad." 347 00:18:32,237 --> 00:18:33,357 I'm going to the restroom. 348 00:18:44,582 --> 00:18:46,632 Are you all right, Mafer? 349 00:18:46,709 --> 00:18:47,499 Fuck! 350 00:18:57,053 --> 00:18:58,563 Why are you crying, girl? 351 00:18:58,638 --> 00:19:01,718 Life. Daniel doesn't see himself having a future with me. 352 00:19:02,308 --> 00:19:03,638 How much did you two drink? 353 00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:06,943 -Just a little. -I think it was more than that. 354 00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:10,071 We did it so you'd stop saying that we're boring. 355 00:19:12,527 --> 00:19:14,027 Are you all right? 356 00:19:14,737 --> 00:19:16,737 -Great. -Why are you crying? 357 00:19:16,823 --> 00:19:19,243 I see I'm not the only one with a lame date. 358 00:19:19,325 --> 00:19:21,615 Oh, that's gross! 359 00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:24,963 I'm an expert on vomit. 360 00:19:25,039 --> 00:19:28,079 This will do wonders for you, want some? 361 00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:32,170 -Anybody? -No, thanks. 362 00:19:33,256 --> 00:19:34,756 Go to hell, then. 363 00:19:36,968 --> 00:19:38,048 Listen, Mafer. 364 00:19:44,559 --> 00:19:46,269 Pharmacy for Mr. Berberto? 365 00:19:48,062 --> 00:19:49,862 Yes, that's me. 366 00:19:49,939 --> 00:19:51,519 -How nice of you. -Excuse me. 367 00:19:57,822 --> 00:19:59,202 ADULT DIAPERS 368 00:20:06,247 --> 00:20:07,617 VIAGRA 369 00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:31,809 I think you'll be needing these. 370 00:20:35,777 --> 00:20:38,737 I tried to be dominant, and she laughed at me. 371 00:20:38,821 --> 00:20:40,531 -What now? -Forget her. 372 00:20:40,615 --> 00:20:43,445 You deserve better, dude. Whatever. 373 00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:45,410 Thank you so much. 374 00:20:47,121 --> 00:20:50,291 -I think I'm going to cry. -That's a personal problem. 375 00:20:50,375 --> 00:20:53,705 Hey, fuckers, where's Mafer? I really screwed up with her. 376 00:20:53,795 --> 00:20:54,955 What'd you do, man? 377 00:20:55,046 --> 00:20:59,466 I'm drunk and said something stupid about giving it time. 378 00:20:59,550 --> 00:21:02,010 Hey, concentrate. 379 00:21:02,095 --> 00:21:05,255 The thing is, you and Mafer are the best couple I know. 380 00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:09,388 Don't fuck it up. Go find her and show her that you love her. Okay? 381 00:21:09,894 --> 00:21:11,734 You're right. 382 00:21:11,813 --> 00:21:14,863 -Do you have a lighter? -I do. Here. 383 00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:17,819 We have the wax, man. 384 00:21:19,862 --> 00:21:21,072 We have the wax. 385 00:21:21,155 --> 00:21:25,235 What? What's wrong with everyone? What the hell was that? 386 00:21:25,326 --> 00:21:26,576 Assholes... 387 00:21:27,954 --> 00:21:29,714 I have to get rid of the professor. 388 00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:32,209 Okay. Who is he, the damn professor? 389 00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:34,421 That old geezer who's with Fabiana. 390 00:21:34,502 --> 00:21:36,712 -Which one? -Don't look now. 391 00:21:36,796 --> 00:21:39,716 He took a Golden X with Ensure. 392 00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,179 -Right in front of me! -What? 393 00:21:41,259 --> 00:21:43,849 Why don't you let Fabiana enjoy her date? 394 00:21:43,928 --> 00:21:47,638 I don't trust that jerk. He's taking advantage of Fabi. 395 00:21:47,724 --> 00:21:50,854 He thinks he's slyer than Gonzo. I need you to help me. 396 00:21:50,935 --> 00:21:53,855 No. I'm the one who needs help, that's why you're here. 397 00:21:53,938 --> 00:21:56,478 -I could help you. -Thanks, man. 398 00:21:56,566 --> 00:21:57,566 Only you. 399 00:21:57,859 --> 00:22:00,029 But help me help you. 400 00:22:00,111 --> 00:22:02,781 -Are you bribing me, Fish? -Yes. 401 00:22:02,864 --> 00:22:05,834 -How much? -My bill plus 15 percent. 402 00:22:05,908 --> 00:22:08,658 -Holy fuck, what did you order? -Come on, man. 403 00:22:08,745 --> 00:22:11,205 -At least pay the tip. -All right! 404 00:22:12,081 --> 00:22:14,631 -Okay. -This is what we're going to do. 405 00:22:14,709 --> 00:22:17,669 Give me advice with Beatriz because this isn't working. 406 00:22:17,754 --> 00:22:21,224 Sebastián, if your date doesn't work, go home and jerk off. 407 00:22:21,299 --> 00:22:24,139 -Like all normal people. -Shit, that's your advice? 408 00:22:24,218 --> 00:22:25,888 What can I say, man? 409 00:22:27,263 --> 00:22:28,893 I think that's how your night will end. 410 00:22:29,515 --> 00:22:31,515 It's not that bad either. 411 00:22:31,601 --> 00:22:33,061 Just jack it. 412 00:22:33,144 --> 00:22:34,854 I can't believe you guys. 413 00:22:35,855 --> 00:22:38,475 -This is my idea... -Here's the check! 414 00:22:38,566 --> 00:22:41,526 -Stop ordering stuff! -Just a minute. 415 00:22:41,611 --> 00:22:46,031 Darling, remember I told you earlier that at some point I'd ask you for a favor? 416 00:22:46,115 --> 00:22:47,615 You want a threesome? 417 00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:52,370 -No, you're going to help me. -Exactly. Listen to him. 418 00:22:52,455 --> 00:22:54,165 -Okay, then. -This is the plan... 419 00:22:54,957 --> 00:22:56,287 -How do I look? -Good. 420 00:23:08,805 --> 00:23:11,515 Darling, I'm sorry about what I said. 421 00:23:11,599 --> 00:23:13,639 I didn't mean to hurt you. 422 00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:17,556 I just don't want us to end up alone and turned off... 423 00:23:17,647 --> 00:23:18,557 without a flame. 424 00:23:19,065 --> 00:23:21,435 That won't happen. You know why? 425 00:23:23,653 --> 00:23:24,993 Because we have the flame. 426 00:23:29,117 --> 00:23:30,907 María Fernanda Azpe, 427 00:23:33,746 --> 00:23:35,116 will you marry me? 428 00:23:43,714 --> 00:23:44,724 Yes. 429 00:23:51,264 --> 00:23:53,314 -Did you throw up? -No. 430 00:24:03,151 --> 00:24:04,151 Shit! 431 00:24:05,153 --> 00:24:06,153 Damn candle. 432 00:24:06,237 --> 00:24:08,567 -Team Dafer, fuckers. -Yeah! 433 00:24:11,117 --> 00:24:14,367 That was fun, I hope we can go out again sometime. 434 00:24:14,453 --> 00:24:16,873 Thanks a lot for the invitation. 435 00:24:16,956 --> 00:24:19,746 We don't have to lie, it really sucked. 436 00:24:19,834 --> 00:24:21,544 We'll never go out again, will we? 437 00:24:21,627 --> 00:24:24,707 -Unless you go viral again. -Right. 438 00:24:26,174 --> 00:24:28,514 -My ride is here. -Who? 439 00:24:29,260 --> 00:24:31,050 My second date. 440 00:24:31,137 --> 00:24:34,307 Or did you think I'd finish the night on such a low note? 441 00:24:35,808 --> 00:24:36,808 Of course. 442 00:24:38,144 --> 00:24:41,114 Well, I actually... 443 00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:45,740 thought I'd have more time to... 444 00:24:45,818 --> 00:24:49,278 I think I'm a good person, and... 445 00:24:50,072 --> 00:24:51,992 You're cool, but... 446 00:24:53,576 --> 00:24:54,906 I wanted to... 447 00:24:56,454 --> 00:24:58,874 -I just... -See? 448 00:24:59,790 --> 00:25:02,630 See? See how I can cry? 449 00:25:04,545 --> 00:25:07,005 -Yes, you can! -Yeah. 450 00:25:07,423 --> 00:25:09,933 Do you want me to try and cancel the second date? 451 00:25:10,009 --> 00:25:12,259 No, there. I'm fine. 452 00:25:12,345 --> 00:25:14,305 -Fine. -All right, then. 453 00:25:23,356 --> 00:25:24,436 Loser. 454 00:25:29,654 --> 00:25:31,994 Why so early? Is it past your bedtime? 455 00:25:33,074 --> 00:25:34,534 No, we have to go. 456 00:25:34,867 --> 00:25:38,447 Professor Berberto Strung! 457 00:25:39,622 --> 00:25:41,332 That's me. Good evening. Excuse me. 458 00:25:41,415 --> 00:25:43,535 You don't remember me, jerk? 459 00:25:43,626 --> 00:25:47,706 Just so you recall, we fucked good and hard. 460 00:25:48,506 --> 00:25:50,296 -Remember. -You're confused, miss. 461 00:25:50,383 --> 00:25:52,223 You're a stud, professor! 462 00:25:52,301 --> 00:25:55,511 Fabiana, this isn't what you think. 463 00:25:55,596 --> 00:25:58,766 Come on. Stop pretending you didn't like it, wimp. 464 00:25:58,849 --> 00:26:01,769 -You can't deny you were with me! -You're wrong. 465 00:26:01,852 --> 00:26:05,982 Hey, old man! Stop touching my woman! 466 00:26:06,065 --> 00:26:08,565 This is a mistake. I don't know her. 467 00:26:08,651 --> 00:26:09,991 What mistake, fucker? 468 00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:13,859 What the hell is going on, Fish? You too? 469 00:26:13,948 --> 00:26:16,278 What? You two know each other? 470 00:26:16,367 --> 00:26:17,287 No! 471 00:26:18,828 --> 00:26:20,658 What kind of sick friends do you have? 472 00:26:20,746 --> 00:26:22,826 -They're screwing around. -Fabiana. 473 00:26:22,915 --> 00:26:26,245 I don't have time to waste on immature kids. 474 00:26:26,335 --> 00:26:27,995 I'm Berberto Strung. 475 00:26:29,046 --> 00:26:31,546 It's never been so complicated to get laid. 476 00:26:32,049 --> 00:26:33,049 Really? 477 00:26:33,134 --> 00:26:34,934 -I told you. -Shut up! 478 00:26:35,011 --> 00:26:38,971 Shall we? I know a new place, and it's vegan. 479 00:26:39,890 --> 00:26:41,600 Try growing some marbles. 480 00:26:41,684 --> 00:26:44,274 You can't go off with this creep, Francesca! 481 00:26:47,148 --> 00:26:49,898 -You went too far, Gonzo. -I did you a favor. 482 00:26:49,984 --> 00:26:51,824 I don't need any favors from you. 483 00:26:51,902 --> 00:26:55,412 He's a douche bag who wants to fuck you just because you're his fan. 484 00:26:55,489 --> 00:26:59,619 That's all I wanted too because I'm his fan, stupid! 485 00:26:59,702 --> 00:27:02,502 Just so you know, I'm not getting laid tonight either. 486 00:27:21,057 --> 00:27:23,677 Hey, is the baby comfy enough? 487 00:27:23,768 --> 00:27:25,898 Just... No. 488 00:27:26,395 --> 00:27:29,895 No, sorry. I just came out for some air, I didn't mean to... 489 00:27:30,524 --> 00:27:33,574 You can get air away from my bike. 490 00:27:34,195 --> 00:27:37,195 Yes. Sorry, I don't want any trouble. I apologize. 491 00:27:38,657 --> 00:27:40,527 Hey, I'm kidding! 492 00:27:40,618 --> 00:27:43,248 -Bye, people! -See you later. 493 00:27:43,329 --> 00:27:47,079 Julieta, that's my name. Do you have a name, baby face? 494 00:27:47,833 --> 00:27:50,343 Yeah. Sebastián. Pleased to meet you. 495 00:27:50,836 --> 00:27:52,336 Have you been crying, Sebastián? 496 00:27:54,423 --> 00:27:57,393 Yes, I have, actually. 497 00:27:58,010 --> 00:28:00,680 How cute. I love men who cry. 498 00:28:00,763 --> 00:28:02,353 -You do? -I do. 499 00:28:03,808 --> 00:28:06,018 -You're leaving? -Yes. 500 00:28:07,019 --> 00:28:08,979 -How can I find you? -What? 501 00:28:09,438 --> 00:28:11,768 -Give me your number? -I don't have a phone. 502 00:28:11,857 --> 00:28:15,647 -Your social media accounts, then. -I don't have social media or anything. 503 00:28:19,949 --> 00:28:21,579 How can I find you again? 504 00:28:22,660 --> 00:28:27,540 I don't know. If we already coincided once, we might run into each other again. Bye. 505 00:28:38,717 --> 00:28:39,887 Hey! 37011

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