subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for Harriet.the.Spy.1996.720p.WEB-DL.DD5.1.h.264-fiend

Afrikaans

Akan

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic Download

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bemba

Bengali

Bihari

Bosnian Download

Breton

Bulgarian

Cambodian

Catalan

Cebuano

Cherokee

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish Download

Dutch Download

English

Esperanto

Estonian

Ewe

Faroese

Filipino

Finnish

French Download

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Guarani

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Interlingua

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Kinyarwanda

Kirundi

Kongo

Korean

Krio (Sierra Leone)

Kurdish

Kurdish (Soranî)

Kyrgyz

Laothian

Latin

Latvian

Lingala

Lithuanian

Lozi

Luganda

Luo

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mauritian Creole

Moldavian

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Montenegrin

Nepali

Nigerian Pidgin

Northern Sotho

Norwegian

Norwegian (Nynorsk)

Occitan

Oriya

Oromo

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese (Brazil)

Portuguese (Portugal) Download

Punjabi

Quechua

Romanian

Romansh

Runyakitara

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Serbo-Croatian

Sesotho

Setswana

Seychellois Creole

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhalese

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish Download

Spanish (Latin American)

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Tatar

Telugu

Thai

Tigrinya

Tonga

Tshiluba

Tumbuka

Turkish

Turkmen

Twi

Uighur

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Wolof

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:03:26,071 --> 00:03:28,403 Boy with ringlets. 2 00:03:31,643 --> 00:03:34,135 Man with tattoos. 3 00:03:36,048 --> 00:03:38,016 Girl on... 4 00:03:38,050 --> 00:03:40,713 a leash? 5 00:03:40,754 --> 00:03:42,688 Man, if my parents ever tried 6 00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:45,749 putting me in one of those things, 7 00:03:45,826 --> 00:03:47,521 I'd trade them in. 8 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:50,258 This kid looks like she can roll over and fetch. 9 00:03:51,933 --> 00:03:53,457 I learn everything I can 10 00:03:53,501 --> 00:03:55,662 and I write down everything I see. 11 00:03:55,703 --> 00:03:57,934 Golly says if I want to be a writer 12 00:03:57,973 --> 00:03:59,702 then I'd better start now. 13 00:04:01,944 --> 00:04:05,210 Which is why I am a spy. 14 00:04:12,390 --> 00:04:14,881 Lady with a purse. 15 00:04:14,925 --> 00:04:16,893 Man with... 16 00:04:16,927 --> 00:04:19,521 her wallet. 17 00:04:19,563 --> 00:04:21,156 Oh, help! 18 00:04:21,199 --> 00:04:22,928 Please! 19 00:04:25,203 --> 00:04:26,192 Stop him! 20 00:04:26,238 --> 00:04:27,637 Stop him! 21 00:04:40,554 --> 00:04:42,852 Quack 22 00:04:42,890 --> 00:04:44,916 Quack, quack 23 00:04:44,959 --> 00:04:46,426 Quack 24 00:04:46,461 --> 00:04:49,089 Quack, quack 25 00:04:49,130 --> 00:04:51,496 And... done. 26 00:04:55,371 --> 00:04:57,271 What is it? 27 00:04:57,306 --> 00:04:58,273 It's Nanomichi. 28 00:04:58,307 --> 00:05:00,401 You know, the god of storm and thunder. 29 00:05:00,444 --> 00:05:02,378 - Cool, huh? - Okay, come on, hurry up 30 00:05:02,412 --> 00:05:03,379 before it dries. 31 00:05:03,413 --> 00:05:04,380 - Yeah. - Yeah. 32 00:05:04,414 --> 00:05:05,904 Okay, ready? 33 00:05:05,949 --> 00:05:07,211 Here, give me your foot. 34 00:05:07,250 --> 00:05:08,718 The secret tattoo. 35 00:05:08,786 --> 00:05:11,653 My best friends Sport, Janie and I thought 36 00:05:11,689 --> 00:05:13,554 we should be blood buddies. 37 00:05:13,591 --> 00:05:15,957 But this was so much less painful. 38 00:05:18,630 --> 00:05:20,461 Just remember the rule. 39 00:05:20,499 --> 00:05:23,491 If anyone sees the secret tattoo... 40 00:05:23,535 --> 00:05:25,970 ...swift and painful death. 41 00:05:35,583 --> 00:05:38,814 It's... starting. 42 00:05:40,455 --> 00:05:43,356 Here comes... 43 00:05:43,391 --> 00:05:47,760 nice Marion Hawthorne. 44 00:05:47,829 --> 00:05:49,092 It's happening. 45 00:05:49,132 --> 00:05:51,225 I can feel it happening. 46 00:05:51,267 --> 00:05:52,666 Good Lord. 47 00:05:52,702 --> 00:05:54,727 It's the dreaded Hawthorne effect. 48 00:05:56,840 --> 00:05:58,171 Oh. 49 00:06:03,213 --> 00:06:05,705 Good morning, Janie, Simon... 50 00:06:05,783 --> 00:06:07,683 and Harriet. 51 00:06:09,053 --> 00:06:11,112 Harri... et! 52 00:06:11,156 --> 00:06:14,024 I got to get to class. 53 00:06:14,059 --> 00:06:15,856 See ya. 54 00:06:15,895 --> 00:06:17,954 See you guys in a few. 55 00:06:21,067 --> 00:06:22,762 Sixth grade. 56 00:06:24,271 --> 00:06:29,710 All the usual suspects are back in action. 57 00:06:29,744 --> 00:06:33,544 First of all there's Rachel Hennessy, 58 00:06:33,581 --> 00:06:35,742 Marion's second in command. 59 00:06:35,850 --> 00:06:39,218 The only thing more pathetic than being Marion Hawthorne 60 00:06:39,254 --> 00:06:42,746 is wanting to be Marion Hawthorne. 61 00:06:45,128 --> 00:06:46,857 Pinky Whitehead, 62 00:06:46,896 --> 00:06:48,887 the human fish belly. 63 00:06:48,932 --> 00:06:51,298 If Janie's theory is right, then Pinky's DNA 64 00:06:51,334 --> 00:06:54,168 was combined with a pint of vanilla yogurt at birth. 65 00:06:54,205 --> 00:06:56,799 Carrie Andrews thinks she's cool... 66 00:06:58,442 --> 00:07:00,877 'cause she spent her summer vacation growing boobs. 67 00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:06,574 Laura Peters looks like someone pinched her face 68 00:07:06,618 --> 00:07:08,951 and it stuck that way. 69 00:07:08,988 --> 00:07:11,422 The boy with purple socks. 70 00:07:11,457 --> 00:07:13,550 A man of mystery. 71 00:07:13,593 --> 00:07:15,527 He never talks. 72 00:07:15,561 --> 00:07:18,725 If I were known only by my footwear, 73 00:07:18,765 --> 00:07:20,699 I'd hang myself. 74 00:07:20,734 --> 00:07:24,466 Beth Ellen Hansen always looks like she's about to cry. 75 00:07:24,505 --> 00:07:26,871 I wish someone would just kick her 76 00:07:26,908 --> 00:07:28,398 and get it over with. 77 00:07:30,078 --> 00:07:32,877 And then of course, there's our teacher... 78 00:07:32,915 --> 00:07:34,348 Miss Elson. 79 00:07:34,383 --> 00:07:36,647 She's nice, and polite. 80 00:07:36,685 --> 00:07:39,381 I bet one day she goes on a psycho killing spree, 81 00:07:39,421 --> 00:07:41,185 and all her neighbors will say... 82 00:07:41,224 --> 00:07:43,215 "She was nice and polite." 83 00:07:43,260 --> 00:07:47,094 Well, from what your last two teachers tell me, 84 00:07:47,130 --> 00:07:49,998 it looks like d�ja vu all over again. 85 00:07:54,839 --> 00:07:59,174 It's time to vote for a sixth grade class president. 86 00:07:59,211 --> 00:08:03,113 And for the third year in a row... 87 00:08:03,148 --> 00:08:06,243 we're down to our final two nominees, 88 00:08:06,286 --> 00:08:09,983 and they are Harriet Welsch 89 00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:13,084 and Marion Hawthorne. 90 00:08:13,127 --> 00:08:16,858 And so, as you may know, 91 00:08:16,897 --> 00:08:19,833 the duties of the class president include 92 00:08:19,868 --> 00:08:24,202 taking attendance, reporting bad behavior 93 00:08:24,239 --> 00:08:30,509 and best of all, editing the sixth grade newspaper. 94 00:08:32,782 --> 00:08:35,046 And now we vote. 95 00:08:36,453 --> 00:08:39,980 Marion Hawthorne... again. 96 00:08:40,023 --> 00:08:42,856 Three years in a row. 97 00:08:42,893 --> 00:08:46,261 You know what? I think I'll invent a poison. 98 00:08:46,297 --> 00:08:47,286 A really good, 99 00:08:47,332 --> 00:08:49,459 clean, untraceable poison. 100 00:08:49,500 --> 00:08:50,967 One that fries your brains 101 00:08:51,002 --> 00:08:53,471 and makes all your bodily fluids boil at once. 102 00:08:53,505 --> 00:08:54,767 - Could you? - Check it out. 103 00:08:54,873 --> 00:08:57,205 One day I'd be like, "Oh, hi, Marion. 104 00:08:57,242 --> 00:08:59,233 "Oh, no, I'm not finishing this soda." 105 00:08:59,278 --> 00:09:00,439 And she'd be like... 106 00:09:06,986 --> 00:09:08,921 I'm serious. 107 00:09:08,956 --> 00:09:10,583 Any of you guys want to come over? 108 00:09:10,624 --> 00:09:11,682 I got to get home. 109 00:09:11,726 --> 00:09:13,557 If my amoebas start incubating, 110 00:09:13,594 --> 00:09:15,425 they really stink up the house. 111 00:09:15,463 --> 00:09:16,590 Harriet? 112 00:09:16,631 --> 00:09:18,599 Sorry. Spy time. 113 00:09:50,869 --> 00:09:53,133 Spy route. 114 00:09:53,171 --> 00:09:55,002 Harrison Withers' place. 115 00:09:55,039 --> 00:09:57,201 Higher altitude, lower risk. 116 00:09:57,243 --> 00:09:58,642 But always a show. 117 00:10:02,982 --> 00:10:06,976 Yeah, everybody's gonna have some grease today... 118 00:10:07,020 --> 00:10:12,323 All right, now, Jelly Roll. Yeah. 119 00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:14,885 Lady Day 120 00:10:14,929 --> 00:10:18,387 Come what may, whatever you say 121 00:10:18,432 --> 00:10:20,298 We all gonna have a good time 122 00:10:20,335 --> 00:10:22,496 A little bit for you, Satchmo 123 00:10:22,538 --> 00:10:24,028 You, Bessie 124 00:10:24,072 --> 00:10:26,472 And how 'bout you, Jelly Roll? 125 00:10:26,508 --> 00:10:29,740 Golly says, people who love work love life. 126 00:10:29,779 --> 00:10:30,939 Dizzy, Dizzy 127 00:10:30,980 --> 00:10:32,811 I like Harrison Withers, 128 00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:35,545 'cause he's a guy that loves both. 129 00:10:35,586 --> 00:10:37,645 Scooby dah... 130 00:10:37,688 --> 00:10:39,519 Scooby-dooby, du-day 131 00:10:39,557 --> 00:10:41,787 Okay, that's it. 132 00:10:45,931 --> 00:10:47,831 Curiously, Harrison lives 133 00:10:47,866 --> 00:10:49,458 for his cats. 134 00:10:49,501 --> 00:10:51,732 Wow! Birdland. 135 00:10:54,207 --> 00:10:56,698 But his work is for the birds. 136 00:10:59,813 --> 00:11:01,974 Charlie Parker. 137 00:11:02,015 --> 00:11:04,575 Yardbird. 138 00:11:04,618 --> 00:11:08,521 In any case, his cages are the most beautiful 139 00:11:08,556 --> 00:11:09,887 I've ever seen. 140 00:11:41,059 --> 00:11:42,321 It's him. 141 00:11:42,361 --> 00:11:44,829 The Health Department has it in for Harrison, 142 00:11:44,930 --> 00:11:47,091 'cause they say he's got too many cats. 143 00:11:48,167 --> 00:11:49,828 I know, I know. 144 00:11:49,903 --> 00:11:53,964 Too bad for them, Harrison has a system. 145 00:11:54,007 --> 00:11:56,602 See a hat, don't be home. 146 00:11:56,644 --> 00:11:59,875 No hat, no problem. 147 00:12:02,483 --> 00:12:05,942 Another score for the cat fan. 148 00:12:17,333 --> 00:12:18,698 Hey. 149 00:12:18,734 --> 00:12:20,794 Hey. 150 00:12:20,837 --> 00:12:22,202 Want some necklace? 151 00:12:22,239 --> 00:12:24,469 How about you, man? 152 00:12:24,508 --> 00:12:26,738 Ew. You got it all spitty. 153 00:12:26,777 --> 00:12:28,609 Tastes better that way. 154 00:12:28,646 --> 00:12:29,806 Good. 155 00:12:29,847 --> 00:12:31,815 Hey, Harriet, what are you writing? 156 00:12:31,849 --> 00:12:32,975 Notes. 157 00:12:33,017 --> 00:12:34,314 Can we read them? 158 00:12:34,352 --> 00:12:36,480 Can you read this? 159 00:12:36,522 --> 00:12:37,489 Okay, okay. 160 00:12:37,523 --> 00:12:38,512 I just wanted to know 161 00:12:38,557 --> 00:12:40,457 why you're always writing like a maniac. 162 00:12:40,492 --> 00:12:42,483 I want to remember everything. 163 00:12:42,528 --> 00:12:44,258 I want to know everything. 164 00:12:44,297 --> 00:12:45,696 Well, you must realize, Harriet, 165 00:12:45,732 --> 00:12:47,723 knowing everything won't do you a bit of good 166 00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,826 unless you use it to put beauty in this world. 167 00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:51,098 True or false? 168 00:12:51,138 --> 00:12:51,832 True. 169 00:12:51,872 --> 00:12:52,839 Of course it is. 170 00:12:52,873 --> 00:12:54,272 Harriet, your mother called. 171 00:12:54,308 --> 00:12:55,468 She's going to be late. 172 00:12:55,509 --> 00:12:56,635 Come on, Sport, Janie. 173 00:12:56,677 --> 00:12:58,304 I'll have you home before dinner. 174 00:12:58,346 --> 00:13:00,212 Golly always takes us places. 175 00:13:00,248 --> 00:13:03,217 She sees things other people barely notice. 176 00:13:03,251 --> 00:13:07,689 She's my nanny and... well, she's Golly. 177 00:13:07,724 --> 00:13:09,282 Okay, survey of the day. 178 00:13:09,325 --> 00:13:10,724 Today's question is: 179 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:12,660 What wouldn't you eat for a million dollars? 180 00:13:12,695 --> 00:13:14,595 Bratwurst. 181 00:13:14,630 --> 00:13:15,598 Sport? 182 00:13:15,632 --> 00:13:18,965 Um... camel boogers, dried roadkill, 183 00:13:19,003 --> 00:13:20,766 and my dad's meatloaf. 184 00:13:20,804 --> 00:13:21,964 Janie? 185 00:13:25,076 --> 00:13:28,671 It's the last day of summer. 186 00:13:28,713 --> 00:13:30,738 Sad but true. 187 00:13:30,782 --> 00:13:33,149 Au revoir, monsieur soleil. 188 00:13:33,185 --> 00:13:34,812 Farewell! 189 00:13:34,887 --> 00:13:35,819 So long, bye-bye. 190 00:13:35,888 --> 00:13:36,820 Sayonara! 191 00:13:36,889 --> 00:13:39,154 - Good-bye... - We're here. 192 00:13:44,498 --> 00:13:45,829 Is this a garden? 193 00:13:45,899 --> 00:13:46,832 What a place! 194 00:13:46,901 --> 00:13:47,833 What is this? 195 00:13:47,902 --> 00:13:49,062 Golly, what's that? 196 00:13:49,103 --> 00:13:52,095 That's Mrs. W., a very good friend of mine. 197 00:13:52,140 --> 00:13:53,402 Kind of unusual. 198 00:13:53,441 --> 00:13:55,410 You know, there are as many ways to live 199 00:13:55,444 --> 00:13:56,843 as there are people in this world. 200 00:13:56,912 --> 00:13:59,312 And each one deserves a closer look. 201 00:13:59,348 --> 00:14:01,179 Welcome! 202 00:14:01,216 --> 00:14:02,410 Come on in. 203 00:14:02,451 --> 00:14:03,419 Hi. 204 00:14:03,453 --> 00:14:04,420 - Hi. - Hi. 205 00:14:04,454 --> 00:14:05,682 Hi. 206 00:14:05,722 --> 00:14:07,781 Look around. 207 00:14:07,857 --> 00:14:09,552 Have fun. 208 00:14:11,295 --> 00:14:13,263 Whoa! Awesome! 209 00:14:21,106 --> 00:14:22,164 Bop, bop, bop, bop! 210 00:14:30,683 --> 00:14:32,480 Do-wat, do-wat, do-wat 211 00:14:32,518 --> 00:14:33,883 I'm goin'! 212 00:14:39,626 --> 00:14:42,026 Ooh. 213 00:14:55,544 --> 00:14:56,476 I'm goin'! 214 00:15:03,353 --> 00:15:04,445 Hey, you guys... 215 00:15:04,488 --> 00:15:06,980 what do you say I propose a toast? 216 00:15:07,024 --> 00:15:09,458 Come on. 217 00:15:12,797 --> 00:15:14,560 Oh... go away. 218 00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:16,568 Say it quick, before it stops fizzing. 219 00:15:16,602 --> 00:15:19,093 Shake it up, take a sip, and wish for what you want 220 00:15:19,138 --> 00:15:20,105 most in the world. 221 00:15:20,139 --> 00:15:21,606 Okay. 222 00:15:21,640 --> 00:15:24,007 I want to replicate my own DNA 223 00:15:24,043 --> 00:15:25,772 and win the Nobel Peace Prize. Yeah. 224 00:15:27,514 --> 00:15:28,481 Oh! 225 00:15:28,515 --> 00:15:29,641 Very good, Janie. 226 00:15:29,682 --> 00:15:30,707 Okay, shake it up, Sport. 227 00:15:30,751 --> 00:15:31,740 Shake it up. 228 00:15:31,785 --> 00:15:33,377 I want to play more baseball games 229 00:15:33,420 --> 00:15:34,512 than Cal Ripkin, Jr. 230 00:15:34,555 --> 00:15:35,852 Oh, yeah! 231 00:15:36,790 --> 00:15:38,952 And get filthy rich doing it. 232 00:15:38,994 --> 00:15:39,983 Oh, yeah! 233 00:15:40,028 --> 00:15:42,826 Shake it, Harriet. 234 00:15:42,931 --> 00:15:44,489 I want to see the whole world 235 00:15:44,533 --> 00:15:46,525 and I want to write down everything. 236 00:15:55,312 --> 00:15:56,574 Harriet, slow down. 237 00:15:56,613 --> 00:15:59,173 That's very impressive. 238 00:15:59,216 --> 00:16:00,410 Harriet? 239 00:16:01,485 --> 00:16:02,453 I'm goin'! 240 00:16:02,487 --> 00:16:03,579 That's good, Harriet. 241 00:16:03,621 --> 00:16:04,986 That's very pretty, isn't it, Janie? 242 00:16:05,023 --> 00:16:06,012 Yes, I like it. 243 00:16:08,259 --> 00:16:09,521 Got you! 244 00:16:29,217 --> 00:16:30,980 Hey, wait up. 245 00:16:33,956 --> 00:16:36,619 Everybody, hello! It sucks, sixth grade! 246 00:16:36,659 --> 00:16:38,024 Feet off the bed, please. 247 00:16:38,061 --> 00:16:39,756 Okay. 248 00:16:42,132 --> 00:16:43,157 Feet off. 249 00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:44,599 Oh, the heinie bounce. 250 00:16:44,635 --> 00:16:45,602 Good choice. 251 00:16:45,636 --> 00:16:47,103 Very cute, Harriet, very cute. 252 00:16:47,138 --> 00:16:48,435 The neighbors will ask me, 253 00:16:48,472 --> 00:16:50,167 "What happened to Harriet Welsch?" 254 00:16:50,207 --> 00:16:51,175 "I don't know," I'll answer. 255 00:16:51,209 --> 00:16:52,176 "Such a shame. 256 00:16:52,210 --> 00:16:54,405 "She disappeared without a trace. 257 00:16:54,446 --> 00:16:56,573 And she was so adorable." 258 00:16:56,615 --> 00:16:58,641 How long have you been with me, Golly? 259 00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:00,208 Since you were born. 260 00:17:00,253 --> 00:17:03,154 11 years and 12,000 tomato sandwiches ago. 261 00:17:03,189 --> 00:17:05,123 And you'll never leave me, right? 262 00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:07,024 Well, I won't leave you "leave you," Harriet, 263 00:17:07,061 --> 00:17:09,291 but, you know, one day you're going to be big enough. 264 00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:12,492 And well... well, big enough to take care of yourself. 265 00:17:12,533 --> 00:17:13,625 And when that day comes 266 00:17:13,667 --> 00:17:15,397 you won't need me and I'll be gone. 267 00:17:15,437 --> 00:17:16,995 But you know what? 268 00:17:17,038 --> 00:17:19,006 That day is not today. 269 00:17:19,040 --> 00:17:20,803 And now, it's time for bed. 270 00:17:20,842 --> 00:17:22,606 Are Mom and Dad tucking me in? 271 00:17:22,645 --> 00:17:23,612 No. 272 00:17:23,646 --> 00:17:25,637 They're at a very fancy party 273 00:17:25,681 --> 00:17:28,741 and I bet they're thinking about you right now. Really. 274 00:17:28,784 --> 00:17:31,276 Listen, I think I can hear 'em. 275 00:17:31,321 --> 00:17:33,221 Harriet... 276 00:17:33,256 --> 00:17:36,225 listen to everything Golly says to you. 277 00:17:36,259 --> 00:17:40,253 We're drinking champagne and eating caviar, Harriet. 278 00:17:40,298 --> 00:17:41,629 Come on. 279 00:17:41,666 --> 00:17:43,964 Let's go to bed. 280 00:17:44,001 --> 00:17:45,468 Who's going to bed? 281 00:17:45,503 --> 00:17:47,062 Uh, you are, tough guy. 282 00:17:47,106 --> 00:17:48,573 - Come on. - Ow! Ow! 283 00:17:48,607 --> 00:17:49,596 Child abuse! Child abuse! 284 00:17:49,641 --> 00:17:51,006 Oh, you think that's child abuse? 285 00:17:51,043 --> 00:17:52,510 You haven't even... How about that? 286 00:17:52,544 --> 00:17:54,274 What about that? What about one of these? 287 00:17:56,716 --> 00:17:59,310 Stand still, you little booger. 288 00:17:59,352 --> 00:18:00,979 Ugh! 289 00:18:03,357 --> 00:18:05,518 I'm telling you, just give me the big knife 290 00:18:05,559 --> 00:18:06,924 and this will all be over. 291 00:18:06,961 --> 00:18:08,622 Harriet, dear, you have taken 292 00:18:08,662 --> 00:18:10,790 a tomato sandwich to school with you... 293 00:18:10,832 --> 00:18:11,799 With mayonnaise. 294 00:18:11,833 --> 00:18:13,130 ...with mayonnaise every day 295 00:18:13,168 --> 00:18:14,396 for that past five years. 296 00:18:14,436 --> 00:18:15,460 Don't you want a little variety? 297 00:18:15,504 --> 00:18:16,471 Nope. 298 00:18:16,505 --> 00:18:19,270 Not even cream cheese with olive? 299 00:18:19,308 --> 00:18:20,366 Yum-yum-yum! 300 00:18:20,409 --> 00:18:23,037 Or how about pastrami? Roast beef? 301 00:18:23,079 --> 00:18:25,639 How about the fancy cucumber kind, 302 00:18:25,681 --> 00:18:27,547 with the crust cut off? 303 00:18:27,584 --> 00:18:31,520 Mom, I can't help it if I know what I like. 304 00:18:31,555 --> 00:18:34,423 And I know that I like tomato. 305 00:18:45,404 --> 00:18:47,929 After school spy route... 306 00:18:47,973 --> 00:18:50,568 Hong Fat's Food Emporium 307 00:19:39,632 --> 00:19:42,362 Holy cats, a veggie thief. 308 00:19:42,401 --> 00:19:44,631 This must be investigated thoroughly. 309 00:19:55,950 --> 00:19:58,646 Frankie, you took the truck last week. 310 00:19:58,686 --> 00:20:00,551 Wasn't that enough? 311 00:20:00,588 --> 00:20:01,680 Stop walking around. 312 00:20:01,723 --> 00:20:04,056 Frankie, go do some homework. 313 00:20:04,093 --> 00:20:05,219 I've done my homework. 314 00:20:05,261 --> 00:20:06,228 Do some reading. 315 00:20:06,262 --> 00:20:07,490 Watch TV. Do something. 316 00:20:07,529 --> 00:20:08,996 Grandpa, all I need is the truck. 317 00:20:09,031 --> 00:20:10,260 I know you know that I mean. 318 00:20:14,471 --> 00:20:16,268 Come on, Ma, let me have the truck. 319 00:20:18,476 --> 00:20:19,443 I got a date! 320 00:20:19,477 --> 00:20:21,035 What do you take me for? 321 00:20:21,078 --> 00:20:24,206 The Hong Fats have a son... Frankie. 322 00:20:24,248 --> 00:20:26,547 He's cool; American style. 323 00:20:26,585 --> 00:20:28,883 His parents are Chinese-style cool. 324 00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:30,547 Frankie likes going out, 325 00:20:30,589 --> 00:20:32,887 but they'd rather he work in the store, 326 00:20:32,924 --> 00:20:36,190 selling milk and bread and lizards. 327 00:20:37,463 --> 00:20:39,431 Ugh! 328 00:20:50,211 --> 00:20:53,647 I mean, do I try to interfere with your bookkeeping?! 329 00:20:53,682 --> 00:20:54,910 My business is comedy! 330 00:20:54,949 --> 00:20:56,143 That's what I do! 331 00:20:56,184 --> 00:20:57,743 I'm funny! I'm the funny guy! 332 00:20:57,787 --> 00:20:58,754 Yes, you are. 333 00:20:58,788 --> 00:21:00,449 They're the money guys. 334 00:21:00,489 --> 00:21:01,456 Okay, slippery, 335 00:21:01,490 --> 00:21:02,457 bath time's over. 336 00:21:02,491 --> 00:21:03,719 Come out with your hands up. 337 00:21:03,759 --> 00:21:04,726 But I just got in. 338 00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:06,353 Oh, sure. I believe that one. 339 00:21:06,396 --> 00:21:08,364 Let's see your fingers, prune girl. 340 00:21:08,398 --> 00:21:10,195 Talk to the hand, 'cause the face 341 00:21:10,233 --> 00:21:11,325 ain't gonna listen. 342 00:21:11,368 --> 00:21:12,995 He asked me to come up 343 00:21:13,036 --> 00:21:14,800 with something new, something fresh. 344 00:21:14,839 --> 00:21:16,067 You read it. It was good. 345 00:21:16,107 --> 00:21:17,631 - Yes. - It was the funniest script 346 00:21:17,675 --> 00:21:18,664 we've had all year! 347 00:21:18,710 --> 00:21:20,439 Yes, it was. So what was their problem? 348 00:21:20,478 --> 00:21:21,969 Hey, I want to hear. 349 00:21:22,014 --> 00:21:24,278 Oh, yeah? I want to sing opera, 350 00:21:24,316 --> 00:21:26,147 but I can't, so I don't. 351 00:21:26,185 --> 00:21:27,345 That downstairs is... 352 00:21:27,386 --> 00:21:32,222 Well, your dad has a high-pressure job. 353 00:21:32,258 --> 00:21:33,555 What's a high-pressure job? 354 00:21:33,593 --> 00:21:35,527 It's when you don't get to do what you want 355 00:21:35,562 --> 00:21:36,586 and when you do, 356 00:21:36,629 --> 00:21:37,892 you don't have time to do it. 357 00:21:37,932 --> 00:21:40,765 Do spies have high-pressure jobs? 358 00:21:40,801 --> 00:21:42,564 Only when they're caught. 359 00:21:42,603 --> 00:21:43,900 I'm never caught. 360 00:21:43,938 --> 00:21:45,098 You're right. 361 00:21:45,139 --> 00:21:46,300 You never are. 362 00:21:46,341 --> 00:21:47,968 Oh, look, a ugly water bug! 363 00:21:49,611 --> 00:21:50,669 Hey! 364 00:21:50,712 --> 00:21:51,736 Caught ya. 365 00:21:52,814 --> 00:21:54,077 Here she is. 366 00:21:58,521 --> 00:21:59,488 Night. 367 00:21:59,522 --> 00:22:00,489 Good night. 368 00:22:00,523 --> 00:22:02,515 Good night. You want me to tuck you in? 369 00:22:02,559 --> 00:22:03,685 Golly can do it. 370 00:22:07,564 --> 00:22:09,499 "'The time has come,' the Walrus said. 371 00:22:09,534 --> 00:22:11,024 "To talk of many things." 372 00:22:11,069 --> 00:22:12,559 "Of shoes and ships and sealing wax." 373 00:22:12,604 --> 00:22:13,628 "Of cabbages and kings." 374 00:22:13,671 --> 00:22:15,002 "And why the sea is boiling hot." 375 00:22:15,039 --> 00:22:16,336 "And whether pigs have wings."' 376 00:22:16,374 --> 00:22:17,341 - Do you have any wings? - Yeah. 377 00:22:17,375 --> 00:22:18,365 Let me see. 378 00:22:28,922 --> 00:22:30,150 Crap? No, no. 379 00:22:30,190 --> 00:22:31,714 This stuff is beyond crap. 380 00:22:31,758 --> 00:22:34,557 This is what crap wants to be when it grows up. 381 00:22:34,595 --> 00:22:35,721 Listen to this. 382 00:22:35,763 --> 00:22:37,993 "A Question Corner by Marion Hawthorne. 383 00:22:38,032 --> 00:22:40,432 "Horse riding, for those who can afford it 384 00:22:40,468 --> 00:22:42,061 "is a very wonderful sport. 385 00:22:42,104 --> 00:22:44,902 "Every weekend, my father takes me riding 386 00:22:44,973 --> 00:22:47,840 and we laugh together as we ride." 387 00:22:49,379 --> 00:22:51,540 Does she mention her mom pays for dork lessons? 388 00:22:51,581 --> 00:22:52,548 Man, once that 389 00:22:52,582 --> 00:22:55,517 disintegration ray is complete... bzzt! 390 00:22:55,552 --> 00:22:57,247 She's molecular toast. 391 00:22:57,287 --> 00:22:58,516 - Oh, yeah. - Oh, yeah. 392 00:22:58,556 --> 00:23:00,285 Mom and Dad's night out. 393 00:23:00,324 --> 00:23:03,191 Me and Golly's night in. 394 00:23:03,227 --> 00:23:04,421 Hello. 395 00:23:06,898 --> 00:23:08,058 What's that smell? 396 00:23:08,099 --> 00:23:09,862 Delicious German bratwurst. 397 00:23:09,901 --> 00:23:11,869 We hate bratwurst. 398 00:23:11,903 --> 00:23:13,531 I love bratwurst. 399 00:23:13,573 --> 00:23:14,699 Since when? 400 00:23:15,908 --> 00:23:17,068 I'll get it! 401 00:23:17,109 --> 00:23:18,701 No. No, no. I will get it. 402 00:23:18,744 --> 00:23:20,268 I'll get it! I'll get it! I'll get it! 403 00:23:20,313 --> 00:23:22,282 I'll get it! I'll get it! I'll get it! 404 00:23:22,316 --> 00:23:23,510 I said I'll get it 405 00:23:23,550 --> 00:23:24,881 and I mean I'll get it. 406 00:23:24,918 --> 00:23:26,442 - I got it! - No. 407 00:23:26,487 --> 00:23:28,887 I'll get it! 408 00:23:28,922 --> 00:23:30,550 Good evening, Katherine. 409 00:23:30,592 --> 00:23:32,219 The veggie thief. 410 00:23:32,260 --> 00:23:33,557 Katherine? 411 00:23:33,595 --> 00:23:35,062 Harriet Ann Welsch, 412 00:23:35,096 --> 00:23:36,893 Mr. George Waldenstein. 413 00:23:36,931 --> 00:23:38,627 How do you do? 414 00:23:38,667 --> 00:23:41,227 Yeah. 415 00:23:41,270 --> 00:23:43,431 I've seen him around. 416 00:23:43,472 --> 00:23:45,270 Bet he stole that pineapple. 417 00:24:19,446 --> 00:24:20,413 Good soup. 418 00:24:20,447 --> 00:24:21,607 Harriet, 419 00:24:21,649 --> 00:24:22,980 where are your manners? 420 00:24:23,017 --> 00:24:23,984 I don't know. 421 00:24:24,018 --> 00:24:26,044 Maybe somebody stole them. 422 00:25:01,360 --> 00:25:03,021 Hey, you cheated. 423 00:25:04,229 --> 00:25:05,390 Oh, you win. 424 00:25:05,432 --> 00:25:06,626 My congratulations. 425 00:25:06,666 --> 00:25:08,600 Yeah, well, I know some stuff. 426 00:25:08,635 --> 00:25:10,034 So, you're 427 00:25:10,070 --> 00:25:11,037 a delivery boy? 428 00:25:11,071 --> 00:25:12,504 Mm-hmm. 429 00:25:12,539 --> 00:25:15,873 Well, no offense, but, uh, you're like, what, 45? 430 00:25:15,910 --> 00:25:17,207 Ish. 431 00:25:17,244 --> 00:25:19,872 Shouldn't you be a delivery man by now? 432 00:25:19,947 --> 00:25:21,438 Harriet! 433 00:25:21,483 --> 00:25:23,542 Well, Harriet, I'll tell you. 434 00:25:23,585 --> 00:25:25,883 Not long ago, I had another life. 435 00:25:25,921 --> 00:25:28,014 I had a big business, I had a lot of money, 436 00:25:28,056 --> 00:25:29,024 and you know what? 437 00:25:29,058 --> 00:25:32,425 I was the most miserable man alive. 438 00:25:32,462 --> 00:25:34,396 So, one day, I told my wife that... 439 00:25:34,430 --> 00:25:36,091 - Wife? - I told my wife that I 440 00:25:36,132 --> 00:25:38,328 wanted to start all over again and if she wanted to, 441 00:25:38,369 --> 00:25:39,768 she could start all over with me. 442 00:25:39,803 --> 00:25:41,395 So what happened? 443 00:25:41,438 --> 00:25:44,236 Oh, she left me, but that's all right, that was her choice. 444 00:25:44,274 --> 00:25:46,743 My choice was to become a delivery boy... well, man. 445 00:25:46,778 --> 00:25:48,507 I don't have the business, of course. 446 00:25:48,546 --> 00:25:49,672 I don't have the money. 447 00:25:49,714 --> 00:25:51,682 You know what? 448 00:25:51,716 --> 00:25:54,083 My life is sweet again. 449 00:25:56,722 --> 00:25:58,690 Hmm. 450 00:26:01,128 --> 00:26:02,356 The wurst! 451 00:26:02,396 --> 00:26:04,523 Oh, no! My wurst! 452 00:26:04,564 --> 00:26:05,690 No, no! 453 00:26:05,732 --> 00:26:07,996 Oh... 454 00:26:08,035 --> 00:26:10,004 Oh, Lord. 455 00:26:10,038 --> 00:26:11,300 Oh, no. No. 456 00:26:11,339 --> 00:26:12,431 Don't be sad, Katherine. 457 00:26:12,473 --> 00:26:13,872 This is a blessing in disguise. 458 00:26:13,941 --> 00:26:15,704 That's a pretty good disguise. 459 00:26:15,743 --> 00:26:16,768 Don't you see? 460 00:26:16,812 --> 00:26:18,404 The three of us have to go out for dinner. 461 00:26:18,447 --> 00:26:19,414 - No. - Yeah! 462 00:26:19,448 --> 00:26:21,882 Yes, dinner and a movie! 463 00:26:21,917 --> 00:26:23,817 Movie, movie, movie! Come on, Golly! 464 00:26:23,852 --> 00:26:25,411 The idea seems popular enough. 465 00:26:25,455 --> 00:26:26,649 Yes, but the Welschs... 466 00:26:26,690 --> 00:26:27,657 Will be out. 467 00:26:27,691 --> 00:26:29,886 Till million o'clock! 468 00:26:29,926 --> 00:26:32,588 - Oh, please, Golly. - Please, oh, please? 469 00:26:32,629 --> 00:26:35,292 Oh, please, please, please, oh, please. 470 00:26:35,332 --> 00:26:37,232 Oh, please, please, please. 471 00:26:37,268 --> 00:26:38,530 What the heck. 472 00:27:24,087 --> 00:27:25,111 This is absurd. 473 00:27:39,972 --> 00:27:40,768 Yes! 474 00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:43,671 Don't speak. 475 00:27:45,945 --> 00:27:49,608 Wait! Wait for me! I'm not dead. 476 00:27:56,958 --> 00:27:58,585 Are you okay? 477 00:27:58,626 --> 00:28:00,857 Yeah. 478 00:28:00,896 --> 00:28:02,090 Hey. 479 00:28:02,130 --> 00:28:04,121 How come all the lights are on? 480 00:28:04,166 --> 00:28:05,997 Where is my child? 481 00:28:06,034 --> 00:28:07,831 Uh-oh. 482 00:28:07,869 --> 00:28:09,394 Harriet? Harriet, what are you doing 483 00:28:09,439 --> 00:28:10,406 in that contraption? 484 00:28:10,440 --> 00:28:11,873 Come in here at once. 485 00:28:11,941 --> 00:28:12,999 Miss Golly, what are you doing 486 00:28:13,042 --> 00:28:14,839 with my child, at this hour, without my consent? 487 00:28:14,877 --> 00:28:16,105 - Who is that? - My name is... 488 00:28:16,145 --> 00:28:17,113 - Shut up! - I'm sorry. 489 00:28:17,147 --> 00:28:18,614 We only went to dinner and then a movie. 490 00:28:18,649 --> 00:28:20,583 Harriet is not your daughter, Miss Golly. 491 00:28:20,617 --> 00:28:22,517 She is mine, and you have no idea, none, 492 00:28:22,553 --> 00:28:24,077 what it is like to come home and find 493 00:28:24,121 --> 00:28:25,885 - that your child is missing. - We had no idea 494 00:28:25,957 --> 00:28:27,015 that you'd be home this soon. 495 00:28:27,058 --> 00:28:28,685 I don't care. I don't care what you did 496 00:28:28,727 --> 00:28:29,785 or where you went or why. 497 00:28:29,828 --> 00:28:31,693 All I know is this can never happen again. 498 00:28:31,730 --> 00:28:35,189 Miss Golly... you are fired. 499 00:28:35,234 --> 00:28:36,201 What?! No! 500 00:28:36,235 --> 00:28:37,532 Just a moment. 501 00:28:37,570 --> 00:28:39,629 This is my fault. Please. 502 00:28:39,672 --> 00:28:41,903 Well, it seems awfully sudden. 503 00:28:41,942 --> 00:28:43,102 Actually... 504 00:28:43,143 --> 00:28:46,442 maybe it's not. 505 00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:48,915 I think you're right, Mrs. Welsch. 506 00:28:48,950 --> 00:28:50,815 It is time for me to go. 507 00:28:51,819 --> 00:28:52,786 What? 508 00:28:52,820 --> 00:28:53,844 What? 509 00:28:53,888 --> 00:28:55,287 What? 510 00:28:58,160 --> 00:29:00,287 Now, look, I admit, I lost it... 511 00:29:00,329 --> 00:29:02,058 because, I just... I was frightened. 512 00:29:02,097 --> 00:29:04,532 But the thing is, the fact is we need you, Golly. 513 00:29:04,567 --> 00:29:06,535 We can't do it alone. 514 00:29:06,569 --> 00:29:09,470 We all spoke out of turn, I think. 515 00:29:09,506 --> 00:29:11,201 None of this is causing... 516 00:29:11,241 --> 00:29:13,039 Absolutely not. 517 00:29:13,077 --> 00:29:14,044 Absolutely, no. 518 00:29:14,078 --> 00:29:16,672 I mean, I think we were talking about... 519 00:29:16,714 --> 00:29:18,113 our feelings out there. 520 00:29:18,149 --> 00:29:20,014 You were afraid and-and-and now 521 00:29:20,051 --> 00:29:22,316 what we should be focusing on, right? 522 00:29:22,354 --> 00:29:23,514 Is-is Harriet. 523 00:29:23,555 --> 00:29:25,045 Look, I'm sorry. 524 00:29:25,090 --> 00:29:26,421 - I lost my head out there. - Look. There. 525 00:29:26,458 --> 00:29:27,823 - No, no. - I was just... 526 00:29:27,859 --> 00:29:29,885 but you can't go... I mean, we need you. 527 00:29:29,996 --> 00:29:31,827 Harriet would never stand for it. 528 00:29:31,864 --> 00:29:33,195 Please, won't you reconsider? 529 00:29:33,232 --> 00:29:34,699 You know, it's not about 530 00:29:34,734 --> 00:29:36,167 what happened outside tonight. 531 00:29:36,202 --> 00:29:37,192 It really isn't. 532 00:29:37,237 --> 00:29:38,397 But Golly... 533 00:29:38,439 --> 00:29:40,907 I just... no, I think it's time. I really do. 534 00:29:40,974 --> 00:29:43,568 Harriet can take care of herself now, so she should. 535 00:29:43,610 --> 00:29:44,703 But Harriet's just... 536 00:29:44,746 --> 00:29:45,872 She's just a little girl. 537 00:29:45,914 --> 00:29:47,404 You know, it's the right thing. 538 00:29:47,449 --> 00:29:49,212 It's the right thing for all of us... 539 00:29:49,250 --> 00:29:54,245 for me, for you and for Harriet. 540 00:29:54,290 --> 00:29:57,259 Are you sure? 541 00:29:57,293 --> 00:29:59,853 Yeah, I am. 542 00:30:09,674 --> 00:30:12,108 "'The time has come," the Walrus said," 543 00:30:12,143 --> 00:30:13,633 "To talk of many things... 544 00:30:13,678 --> 00:30:16,739 "Of shoes and ships and sealing wax..." 545 00:30:21,653 --> 00:30:24,122 "Of cabbages and kings... 546 00:30:24,157 --> 00:30:27,558 "And why the sea is boiling hot... 547 00:30:27,594 --> 00:30:30,961 And whether pigs have wings." 548 00:30:54,790 --> 00:30:56,952 Where you going to go? 549 00:30:56,994 --> 00:30:58,985 Well, I don't really know. 550 00:30:59,062 --> 00:31:01,121 I'm thinking I may travel. 551 00:31:01,165 --> 00:31:04,693 Are you going to go be some other kid's nanny now? 552 00:31:04,736 --> 00:31:07,933 And love them more than you? 553 00:31:08,039 --> 00:31:09,199 Never. 554 00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:12,677 Remember, in my life, in this world 555 00:31:12,711 --> 00:31:15,680 there will always only be one Harriet. 556 00:31:19,018 --> 00:31:20,611 So get back to work... you've lost nearly 557 00:31:20,654 --> 00:31:21,882 an entire day on your notebook. 558 00:31:21,922 --> 00:31:23,685 It doesn't matter. 559 00:31:23,723 --> 00:31:25,884 It doesn't matter? 560 00:31:25,926 --> 00:31:27,621 Did I hear you say "It doesn't matter"? 561 00:31:27,661 --> 00:31:29,129 Because I thought I heard you say 562 00:31:29,163 --> 00:31:30,130 "It doesn't matter," 563 00:31:30,164 --> 00:31:31,654 but Harriet wouldn't say that, would she? 564 00:31:31,699 --> 00:31:32,666 Now come on... 565 00:31:32,700 --> 00:31:34,395 just because you're on your own, 566 00:31:34,435 --> 00:31:36,666 doesn't mean the world stops turning, 567 00:31:36,705 --> 00:31:38,969 or that there are no more fascinating people 568 00:31:39,041 --> 00:31:41,168 to observe and fill your notebooks with. 569 00:31:41,210 --> 00:31:43,110 That's your job, Harriet. 570 00:31:43,145 --> 00:31:44,977 That's your job for life. 571 00:31:45,081 --> 00:31:47,242 And when you're all grown up 572 00:31:47,283 --> 00:31:49,547 and you sell your first novel, 573 00:31:49,586 --> 00:31:51,953 I'll be first in line at that bookstore, 574 00:31:51,989 --> 00:31:53,752 getting my autographed copy. 575 00:31:53,791 --> 00:31:56,521 I hope. 576 00:31:59,296 --> 00:32:01,322 I'm not going to cry. 577 00:32:02,601 --> 00:32:04,899 I'm not going to cry. 578 00:32:04,936 --> 00:32:06,403 I'm not going to cry. 579 00:32:06,438 --> 00:32:08,031 Ah, it's okay to cry. 580 00:32:08,074 --> 00:32:09,939 But whatever you do, don't laugh. 581 00:32:10,009 --> 00:32:11,408 No, Harriet, 582 00:32:11,444 --> 00:32:14,675 I will not tolerate laughter as I leave, no. 583 00:32:15,748 --> 00:32:16,738 Hey... 584 00:32:16,783 --> 00:32:18,273 come here. 585 00:32:21,888 --> 00:32:23,753 You remember... 586 00:32:23,791 --> 00:32:26,259 a good spy can get in there and fight. 587 00:32:50,221 --> 00:32:53,156 Good-bye, Harriet the Spy. 588 00:33:12,445 --> 00:33:13,810 I was kind of worried, you know? 589 00:33:13,847 --> 00:33:15,940 I kind of thought, "Well, there's something wrong 590 00:33:15,982 --> 00:33:17,347 with me or something," and so... 591 00:33:19,787 --> 00:33:23,154 Growing up from girl to woman, 592 00:33:23,190 --> 00:33:25,784 there's so much to get used to. 593 00:33:25,826 --> 00:33:30,059 This is the time when a whole new set of feelings unfold. 594 00:33:30,098 --> 00:33:34,626 Feelings about yourself and your maturing body... 595 00:33:34,669 --> 00:33:38,970 Everything's the same as when Golly was here. 596 00:33:39,075 --> 00:33:43,273 It looks the same... 597 00:33:43,312 --> 00:33:46,214 it smells the same... 598 00:33:46,250 --> 00:33:48,218 but there's this tiny hole inside me 599 00:33:48,252 --> 00:33:49,810 that wasn't there before. 600 00:33:53,458 --> 00:33:56,450 It's like... 601 00:33:56,494 --> 00:33:58,689 like a splinter in your finger... 602 00:34:02,001 --> 00:34:05,095 only this one's right above my stomach. 603 00:34:17,451 --> 00:34:18,782 Harriet, 604 00:34:18,819 --> 00:34:20,411 are you okay? 605 00:34:20,454 --> 00:34:23,048 Uh-huh. 606 00:34:34,137 --> 00:34:37,436 Something's... different. 607 00:34:48,954 --> 00:34:50,751 No cats? 608 00:34:50,789 --> 00:34:54,520 How can Harrison Withers not have a billion cats around? 609 00:35:12,814 --> 00:35:14,611 They finally nailed him. 610 00:35:25,628 --> 00:35:29,963 I will always remember that face. 611 00:35:30,066 --> 00:35:36,097 That's the face you make when you really lose something. 612 00:35:41,012 --> 00:35:45,245 Uh-oh, Frankie took the truck. 613 00:36:00,501 --> 00:36:02,059 Speak English! 614 00:36:02,102 --> 00:36:04,935 Oh, okay, you want us to speak English, huh?! 615 00:36:05,005 --> 00:36:06,870 Well, you are a jerk, huh? 616 00:36:06,907 --> 00:36:09,570 I tell you, "Don't take the truck. 617 00:36:09,611 --> 00:36:10,771 You smash the truck." 618 00:36:10,812 --> 00:36:12,109 Well, you tell me now, 619 00:36:12,147 --> 00:36:13,637 Mr. Wise Guy, was one date worth it? 620 00:36:13,682 --> 00:36:14,944 ...we have people here shopping! 621 00:36:15,050 --> 00:36:16,518 Yeah. 622 00:36:21,357 --> 00:36:22,881 Hey, all right, Grandpa. 623 00:36:22,925 --> 00:36:24,086 It's cool, right? 624 00:36:24,127 --> 00:36:25,856 It wasn't a big deal, huh? 625 00:36:25,896 --> 00:36:27,193 I knew you'd understand, right? 626 00:36:30,600 --> 00:36:34,264 Sometimes I think families everywhere 627 00:36:34,305 --> 00:36:36,432 are exactly the same. 628 00:36:36,474 --> 00:36:38,135 Everybody get back to work. 629 00:36:38,176 --> 00:36:40,441 Mom, Dad, please? Grandpa! 630 00:36:40,479 --> 00:36:42,674 Just calm down. 631 00:36:46,318 --> 00:36:47,308 Too exciting. 632 00:36:51,191 --> 00:36:53,716 $6.75. 633 00:37:09,211 --> 00:37:10,838 You got it or not? 634 00:37:25,395 --> 00:37:27,296 Hey, Sport. 635 00:37:27,332 --> 00:37:28,799 How you doing? 636 00:37:28,833 --> 00:37:31,358 Hi. 637 00:37:33,271 --> 00:37:36,764 Um, I saw you drop this outside. 638 00:37:36,809 --> 00:37:38,470 Oh... 639 00:37:39,879 --> 00:37:41,710 Thanks. 640 00:37:52,326 --> 00:37:54,351 I got to go. 641 00:38:06,509 --> 00:38:10,776 Now it's time for our annual sixth grade holiday pageant. 642 00:38:10,814 --> 00:38:13,647 So... pageant ideas... 643 00:38:13,683 --> 00:38:16,175 who would like to make a suggestion? 644 00:38:16,220 --> 00:38:18,085 Simon. 645 00:38:18,122 --> 00:38:19,350 Pirates. 646 00:38:19,390 --> 00:38:22,484 Okay. 647 00:38:24,163 --> 00:38:27,098 Good dramatic potential, if not exactly seasonal. 648 00:38:27,132 --> 00:38:28,759 Anyone else? 649 00:38:30,602 --> 00:38:32,468 How 'bout the Manhattan Project? 650 00:38:32,505 --> 00:38:34,234 I can be J. Robert Oppenheimer 651 00:38:34,274 --> 00:38:35,969 and with the right chemicals, 652 00:38:36,075 --> 00:38:38,066 I know I can do a mushroom cloud. 653 00:38:38,111 --> 00:38:40,103 That's impressive, Janie. 654 00:38:40,147 --> 00:38:44,083 But I believe there's a taste issue involved. 655 00:38:44,118 --> 00:38:45,107 Ballet. 656 00:38:45,152 --> 00:38:46,312 Pilgrims. 657 00:38:46,353 --> 00:38:47,651 Musical. 658 00:38:47,689 --> 00:38:49,486 Swan Lake. 659 00:38:53,028 --> 00:38:54,393 Jazz. 660 00:38:54,429 --> 00:38:55,419 Vlad the lmpaler. 661 00:38:55,464 --> 00:38:57,557 Yeah, that's cool! 662 00:38:57,600 --> 00:39:01,127 I think the most excellent idea for a pageant 663 00:39:01,170 --> 00:39:03,662 would be a giant holiday feast. 664 00:39:03,707 --> 00:39:08,110 Something healthy, low in fat, and very delicious, of course. 665 00:39:08,145 --> 00:39:10,579 There could be parts for everybody. 666 00:39:10,614 --> 00:39:14,711 Uh, grains, vegetables 667 00:39:14,752 --> 00:39:18,483 and best of all, a shiny, silver centerpiece. 668 00:39:18,523 --> 00:39:20,458 That's a very good idea, Marion. 669 00:39:20,492 --> 00:39:22,858 You could play the barf bag. 670 00:39:22,895 --> 00:39:25,762 She made me an onion. 671 00:39:25,798 --> 00:39:26,891 Tell me about it. 672 00:39:26,933 --> 00:39:30,334 "You, my dear, are a great big squash." 673 00:39:30,370 --> 00:39:32,133 I'd like to squash her. 674 00:39:32,172 --> 00:39:34,436 I've got something better. Come here. 675 00:39:40,915 --> 00:39:42,405 Smell this. 676 00:39:42,450 --> 00:39:43,645 Ugh! 677 00:39:43,685 --> 00:39:44,982 What is that? 678 00:39:45,053 --> 00:39:46,213 You like it? 679 00:39:46,255 --> 00:39:47,984 Wait, I mean you hate it. 680 00:39:48,056 --> 00:39:50,821 It's like something crawled up my nose and then died. 681 00:39:50,860 --> 00:39:51,827 Excellent. 682 00:39:51,861 --> 00:39:53,658 It's a sulfur-based alkaloid. 683 00:39:53,696 --> 00:39:55,755 I want it to chemically fuse with combustibles. 684 00:39:55,798 --> 00:39:58,494 And, in English, that would mean... 685 00:39:58,535 --> 00:39:59,661 Stink bomb. 686 00:39:59,703 --> 00:40:01,295 Stink bomb. 687 00:40:01,338 --> 00:40:02,999 We tape it to the school air ducts, 688 00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:04,132 attach it to a timer, 689 00:40:04,174 --> 00:40:06,666 and five minutes before the school play starts... 690 00:40:08,146 --> 00:40:09,204 Empty auditorium. 691 00:40:10,382 --> 00:40:13,215 Hey... 692 00:40:13,251 --> 00:40:14,913 What are you girls doing? 693 00:40:14,954 --> 00:40:16,615 Nothing. Nothing. 694 00:40:16,656 --> 00:40:19,284 Are you getting ready for your big stage debut? 695 00:40:19,325 --> 00:40:20,451 Actually, Mrs. Gibbs, 696 00:40:20,493 --> 00:40:22,860 Janie and I were just talking about the school play. 697 00:40:22,896 --> 00:40:24,022 Right, Janie? 698 00:40:24,064 --> 00:40:25,964 Yeah, we're really looking forward to it. 699 00:40:27,567 --> 00:40:29,501 Good, good. 700 00:40:29,536 --> 00:40:31,300 That's good. 701 00:40:31,339 --> 00:40:33,967 Janie, what is this supposed to be? 702 00:40:34,008 --> 00:40:35,032 No, Mom. 703 00:40:35,076 --> 00:40:35,667 Don't touch it. 704 00:40:39,181 --> 00:40:40,307 What?! 705 00:40:40,349 --> 00:40:41,577 Janie! 706 00:40:41,617 --> 00:40:43,710 It's an experiment with mold. 707 00:40:43,752 --> 00:40:45,879 Oh... Janie! 708 00:40:45,921 --> 00:40:49,289 That's where my Veronica's Closet bra went to, huh? 709 00:40:49,326 --> 00:40:51,157 You know, I'm sick to death 710 00:40:51,194 --> 00:40:53,059 of this mad scientist baloney. 711 00:40:53,096 --> 00:40:54,154 Look at this. Look at this. 712 00:40:54,197 --> 00:40:55,256 Girl, we got to talk. 713 00:40:55,299 --> 00:40:56,994 I don't know what I'm going to do with you, 714 00:40:57,034 --> 00:40:59,059 but we're going to talk. 715 00:40:59,103 --> 00:41:01,264 Some of Janie's experiments really creep me out. 716 00:41:01,305 --> 00:41:05,572 I wonder if she'll grow up to be a billion-IQ genius, 717 00:41:05,610 --> 00:41:07,874 or a total nutcase. 718 00:42:10,784 --> 00:42:12,775 Sport, Sport... 719 00:42:21,362 --> 00:42:22,955 Chicken man. 720 00:42:29,438 --> 00:42:31,100 Do it again, do it again. 721 00:42:45,856 --> 00:42:48,348 Sport. 722 00:42:48,393 --> 00:42:50,884 Sport... 723 00:42:50,929 --> 00:42:52,920 Sport! 724 00:42:54,233 --> 00:42:56,098 Help me. 725 00:42:59,839 --> 00:43:01,966 Hey, Harriet. 726 00:43:02,007 --> 00:43:03,475 Hey. 727 00:43:03,510 --> 00:43:06,104 All right, come on. 728 00:43:17,325 --> 00:43:19,351 How does it look? 729 00:43:19,394 --> 00:43:21,885 Uh... give me the mousse. 730 00:43:24,266 --> 00:43:26,030 No, no... 731 00:43:26,069 --> 00:43:29,800 Don't worry, it's just one of Dad's nightmares. 732 00:43:29,839 --> 00:43:31,204 I mean day-mares. 733 00:43:31,241 --> 00:43:33,232 He says it happens to all great writers 734 00:43:33,276 --> 00:43:35,006 before they get their big break. 735 00:43:35,045 --> 00:43:37,775 Hmm, a real writer. 736 00:43:43,121 --> 00:43:45,919 My dad calls guys like your dad "a starving artist." 737 00:43:45,957 --> 00:43:47,618 Who's starving? 738 00:43:47,659 --> 00:43:51,528 I cook, I clean, I do the dishes and the books. 739 00:43:51,564 --> 00:43:53,395 What do you mean, do the books? 740 00:43:55,668 --> 00:43:58,365 These are the books. 741 00:43:58,405 --> 00:44:00,373 Every week I get a check. 742 00:44:00,407 --> 00:44:02,102 I write the amount down in here, 743 00:44:02,142 --> 00:44:05,373 I pay the bills and then whatever's left is food money. 744 00:44:05,412 --> 00:44:06,971 I hate money. 745 00:44:07,015 --> 00:44:10,178 You'd like it a lot more if you didn't have any. 746 00:44:10,218 --> 00:44:13,085 I got to get to work. 747 00:44:21,898 --> 00:44:24,389 Hey, Sport? 748 00:44:24,434 --> 00:44:25,799 No! Don't. 749 00:44:25,835 --> 00:44:26,995 Yeah, yeah, come on. 750 00:44:27,037 --> 00:44:28,129 Strike a pose. 751 00:44:37,114 --> 00:44:40,812 Spy route: Brand-new stalk. 752 00:44:40,852 --> 00:44:43,343 Home of Agatha K. Plummer, 753 00:44:43,388 --> 00:44:47,553 a big private house with big-type security. 754 00:44:47,593 --> 00:44:50,790 Until today. 755 00:45:16,558 --> 00:45:18,789 A spy must choose ingenious tricks, 756 00:45:18,828 --> 00:45:21,820 must blend into her surroundings. 757 00:45:21,864 --> 00:45:23,832 Hiya, Freckles. 758 00:45:23,866 --> 00:45:26,995 Must live with being called... "Freckles." 759 00:45:37,749 --> 00:45:40,013 Here we go, in you go. 760 00:45:42,088 --> 00:45:44,056 Here he is. 761 00:45:44,123 --> 00:45:45,647 So, here's the little monster. 762 00:45:45,691 --> 00:45:48,524 Bye. Wave to the man. 763 00:45:51,898 --> 00:45:53,058 Are you happy? 764 00:45:53,100 --> 00:45:55,227 Good. 765 00:46:08,150 --> 00:46:10,448 Oh, score! 766 00:46:55,003 --> 00:46:57,062 Quiet. Quiet, puppy dog. 767 00:46:57,138 --> 00:46:58,696 Go away! 768 00:47:00,275 --> 00:47:01,436 Don't, don't, don't. Go away. 769 00:47:02,545 --> 00:47:05,343 Pee-wee, don't make me come in there. 770 00:47:05,381 --> 00:47:06,871 Away. 771 00:47:08,050 --> 00:47:10,042 Go away! 772 00:47:12,255 --> 00:47:15,224 Pee-wee... get away 773 00:47:15,258 --> 00:47:17,693 from that dumbwaiter. 774 00:47:17,728 --> 00:47:19,821 Shut up. 775 00:47:20,898 --> 00:47:23,924 Stupid fuzzball. 776 00:47:23,968 --> 00:47:27,871 I ought to shave you down and teach you to hunt. 777 00:48:28,841 --> 00:48:30,469 Shut up! 778 00:48:33,880 --> 00:48:36,371 No, no. 779 00:48:36,416 --> 00:48:37,714 No, darling. 780 00:48:37,752 --> 00:48:40,744 If you want to talk about something delicious... 781 00:48:41,923 --> 00:48:43,049 ...I have 782 00:48:43,124 --> 00:48:44,591 something delicious. 783 00:48:44,625 --> 00:48:47,424 I have the secret of life. 784 00:48:47,462 --> 00:48:48,759 Yes, darling. 785 00:48:48,797 --> 00:48:49,991 You simply 786 00:48:50,032 --> 00:48:51,556 crawl into your bed, 787 00:48:51,600 --> 00:48:54,263 and you never, ever leave it again. 788 00:48:55,438 --> 00:48:56,632 Never... 789 00:48:56,673 --> 00:48:59,642 Ah, sweet Liberace. 790 00:49:03,881 --> 00:49:05,280 What was that? 791 00:49:05,316 --> 00:49:06,840 I have no idea. 792 00:49:06,884 --> 00:49:09,011 Then why don't you 793 00:49:09,087 --> 00:49:12,386 go over there and get an idea? 794 00:49:15,060 --> 00:49:17,029 And if it's that rat... 795 00:49:17,096 --> 00:49:19,030 kill it! 796 00:49:19,098 --> 00:49:20,827 Oh, Mrs. Plummer, 797 00:49:20,866 --> 00:49:21,890 I'm sure 798 00:49:21,934 --> 00:49:23,925 it's absolutely nothing. 799 00:49:33,481 --> 00:49:35,506 Oh, well... 800 00:49:38,019 --> 00:49:40,044 A good spy never gets caught. 801 00:49:40,088 --> 00:49:42,057 A good spy never gets caught. 802 00:49:42,091 --> 00:49:45,857 A good spy never gets caught. 803 00:49:45,894 --> 00:49:48,522 I am the suckiest spy on earth. 804 00:49:50,567 --> 00:49:52,831 Hey, Harriet, check this out. 805 00:49:52,869 --> 00:49:55,963 "This year's winter pageant promises 806 00:49:56,006 --> 00:49:59,408 "to be truly inspiring, as Miss Elson's 807 00:49:59,443 --> 00:50:03,277 "sixth grade class presents a holiday feast, 808 00:50:03,314 --> 00:50:06,011 "starring a turkey, vegetables, 809 00:50:06,051 --> 00:50:08,383 "and a grand finale 810 00:50:08,420 --> 00:50:12,322 of delicious, dancing... gravy." 811 00:50:13,726 --> 00:50:15,455 Oh, my God. 812 00:50:17,664 --> 00:50:20,224 I'd like to see her split a turkey suit 813 00:50:20,266 --> 00:50:22,462 with butt-breath Pinky Whitehead. 814 00:50:23,937 --> 00:50:25,097 Hurry up. 815 00:50:25,139 --> 00:50:26,401 You're so slow. 816 00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:27,964 Come on, you guys. 817 00:50:28,008 --> 00:50:29,874 Harriet, you want to go play in the park? 818 00:50:29,911 --> 00:50:32,141 Or do you have to do that top secret spy deal again? 819 00:50:34,149 --> 00:50:36,208 No. I can play. 820 00:50:36,251 --> 00:50:37,241 You can? 821 00:50:38,255 --> 00:50:39,654 Yeah, come on. 822 00:50:39,690 --> 00:50:40,816 No way. 823 00:50:40,857 --> 00:50:42,586 I still say we play "Buy the Volvo." 824 00:50:42,626 --> 00:50:43,752 No way. 825 00:50:43,794 --> 00:50:45,126 - That's stupid. - No. 826 00:50:45,196 --> 00:50:46,254 No way! 827 00:50:46,297 --> 00:50:47,491 You guys, I can be the dealer. 828 00:50:47,532 --> 00:50:48,999 You guys can be the couples looking 829 00:50:49,033 --> 00:50:50,762 for a sassy yet affordable family vehicle. 830 00:50:50,802 --> 00:50:51,860 Get real. 831 00:50:51,903 --> 00:50:53,462 Yeah, right. 832 00:50:53,505 --> 00:50:55,234 Okay, I've got it: Hide and Seek. 833 00:50:55,274 --> 00:50:57,139 - No. - Hide and Seek? 834 00:50:57,209 --> 00:50:57,937 I am set. 835 00:50:57,976 --> 00:50:59,307 That's retarded. 836 00:50:59,345 --> 00:51:00,277 Red Rover, Red Rover. 837 00:51:00,312 --> 00:51:01,302 No! 838 00:51:01,348 --> 00:51:02,576 That's a kid's game. 839 00:51:02,615 --> 00:51:04,048 I don't think so. 840 00:51:05,318 --> 00:51:06,717 - Kick the can. - Kick... 841 00:51:08,188 --> 00:51:10,089 What about Spin the Bottle? 842 00:51:10,124 --> 00:51:11,250 Ew! 843 00:51:11,292 --> 00:51:12,452 Yeah, right. 844 00:51:13,728 --> 00:51:14,956 I got it. 845 00:51:14,995 --> 00:51:16,257 Bumper tag. 846 00:51:16,297 --> 00:51:17,959 See, now, that's a good idea. 847 00:51:17,999 --> 00:51:19,091 Eenie-meenie, miney-mo, 848 00:51:19,167 --> 00:51:20,464 Catch a tiger by the toe. 849 00:51:20,502 --> 00:51:21,867 If he hollers, let him go. 850 00:51:21,903 --> 00:51:24,633 My mom said to pick the very best one, 851 00:51:24,674 --> 00:51:26,642 and you are 852 00:51:26,676 --> 00:51:27,836 it. 853 00:51:32,515 --> 00:51:33,983 Away, you foolish mortals! 854 00:51:36,153 --> 00:51:38,144 Beth's it! 855 00:52:17,099 --> 00:52:18,259 Got you! 856 00:52:20,135 --> 00:52:21,364 You run fast, 857 00:52:21,404 --> 00:52:23,964 but now I shall destroy you. 858 00:52:25,175 --> 00:52:26,164 Yeah. 859 00:52:59,046 --> 00:53:01,208 Oh. 860 00:53:06,621 --> 00:53:07,781 You winded? 861 00:53:07,822 --> 00:53:09,222 Nope. 862 00:53:09,258 --> 00:53:11,317 Me, too. 863 00:53:13,062 --> 00:53:15,155 Upsey-daisy. 864 00:53:19,469 --> 00:53:21,460 Time to move. 865 00:53:31,516 --> 00:53:33,417 Where's my notebook? 866 00:53:33,452 --> 00:53:34,680 Your what? 867 00:53:34,720 --> 00:53:36,779 My notebook! 868 00:53:40,793 --> 00:53:42,522 Oh, my God. 869 00:53:44,063 --> 00:53:45,030 Boy... 870 00:53:45,064 --> 00:53:46,361 - Wait, wait. No, wait. - Carrie... 871 00:53:46,399 --> 00:53:47,730 Carrie. Carrie, Carrie, Carrie. 872 00:53:47,767 --> 00:53:48,735 Andrews. 873 00:53:48,769 --> 00:53:49,736 Get this. Get... Okay. 874 00:53:49,770 --> 00:53:51,533 "Carrie Andrews thinks she's so cool 875 00:53:51,572 --> 00:53:53,437 "'cause she spent her summer vacation 876 00:53:53,474 --> 00:53:54,964 growing boobs." 877 00:53:58,213 --> 00:53:59,612 - Come on, read some more. - Okay. 878 00:53:59,648 --> 00:54:01,013 Hold on, hold on. 879 00:54:01,049 --> 00:54:02,175 Okay. 880 00:54:02,217 --> 00:54:04,208 "Now, the Boy with the Purple Socks 881 00:54:04,253 --> 00:54:05,550 is a man of mystery." 882 00:54:05,588 --> 00:54:07,351 Mystery! 883 00:54:07,390 --> 00:54:09,051 Hold on, you guys, you guys. 884 00:54:09,091 --> 00:54:10,080 Listen, listen, listen. 885 00:54:10,192 --> 00:54:11,557 "The only thing more pathetic 886 00:54:11,594 --> 00:54:12,960 "than being Marion Hawthorne, 887 00:54:12,996 --> 00:54:15,430 is wanting to be Marion Hawthorne." 888 00:54:15,465 --> 00:54:16,796 Oh, Rachel. 889 00:54:16,833 --> 00:54:18,027 Rachel. 890 00:54:18,068 --> 00:54:19,433 She is... 891 00:54:19,469 --> 00:54:20,937 - Jealous. - She's jealous. 892 00:54:20,972 --> 00:54:22,200 It's pure jealousy. 893 00:54:22,240 --> 00:54:23,571 You give that back now! 894 00:54:23,608 --> 00:54:25,473 Looks like there's something in here for everyone. 895 00:54:25,510 --> 00:54:27,068 You heard her, Marion. 896 00:54:27,111 --> 00:54:30,570 Give it back before I pound you into the cement. 897 00:54:30,616 --> 00:54:33,050 Ooh, I'm so scared. 898 00:54:33,085 --> 00:54:34,313 Hey, maybe there is something 899 00:54:34,353 --> 00:54:35,513 in here for you. 900 00:54:41,861 --> 00:54:43,089 Janie... 901 00:54:43,129 --> 00:54:44,825 Janie, Janie, Janie... 902 00:54:44,865 --> 00:54:46,025 Come and get it. 903 00:54:46,067 --> 00:54:47,591 Read it. Come on. 904 00:54:47,635 --> 00:54:49,125 What does it say? 905 00:54:49,236 --> 00:54:51,466 - Come on. - Janie, Janie. 906 00:54:51,505 --> 00:54:53,531 "Janie really creeps me out." 907 00:54:53,575 --> 00:54:54,735 Ooh. 908 00:54:54,776 --> 00:54:57,870 "I wonder if she'll grow up to be... 909 00:54:57,913 --> 00:55:00,280 a total nutcase..."? 910 00:55:00,316 --> 00:55:01,613 A nutcase! 911 00:55:02,785 --> 00:55:04,082 Oh. 912 00:55:04,120 --> 00:55:05,280 Hey. 913 00:55:05,321 --> 00:55:06,583 Her best friend. 914 00:55:06,623 --> 00:55:08,421 That's her best friend. 915 00:55:09,827 --> 00:55:11,021 Beth. 916 00:55:12,730 --> 00:55:15,597 "I wish someone would kick Beth Ellen." 917 00:55:15,633 --> 00:55:16,760 Oh! 918 00:55:20,005 --> 00:55:21,973 Uh, Laura. 919 00:55:22,007 --> 00:55:27,241 "Laura Peters... her face looks totally... 920 00:55:27,279 --> 00:55:28,405 pinched." 921 00:55:28,447 --> 00:55:30,779 Oh. 922 00:55:35,656 --> 00:55:37,647 "If I were the boy with the purple socks... 923 00:55:38,659 --> 00:55:40,787 I'd hang myself." 924 00:55:42,497 --> 00:55:44,624 Something else. 925 00:55:44,666 --> 00:55:45,894 Cut it out, Marion. 926 00:55:45,933 --> 00:55:48,334 Oh. 927 00:55:48,370 --> 00:55:50,600 Maybe there is something in here for Sport. 928 00:55:50,639 --> 00:55:52,334 No! 929 00:55:52,374 --> 00:55:53,466 "Sport..." 930 00:55:53,509 --> 00:55:54,441 Shut up! 931 00:55:54,476 --> 00:55:55,443 Fine, then. 932 00:55:55,477 --> 00:55:56,638 I'll read it right out loud 933 00:55:56,680 --> 00:55:57,669 so everybody can hear. 934 00:55:59,282 --> 00:55:59,941 No! 935 00:56:01,718 --> 00:56:03,914 "Sport is so poor, he can't even afford food. 936 00:56:03,954 --> 00:56:06,081 "Why can't his father 937 00:56:06,190 --> 00:56:07,589 just get a real job?" 938 00:56:08,759 --> 00:56:10,784 Oh, and get this, as well. 939 00:56:10,828 --> 00:56:13,821 "One day, I had to pretend he dropped a dollar 940 00:56:13,865 --> 00:56:16,834 just so he could afford some milk and bread." 941 00:56:16,868 --> 00:56:19,359 Oh. 942 00:56:19,404 --> 00:56:21,464 Ooh, harsh. 943 00:56:21,507 --> 00:56:23,372 Oh, oh, oh. 944 00:56:24,477 --> 00:56:26,672 That's mean. 945 00:56:26,713 --> 00:56:29,342 Sport, I... 946 00:56:29,383 --> 00:56:30,509 I-I got to go. 947 00:56:30,551 --> 00:56:32,314 It-it's spaghetti night. 948 00:56:32,352 --> 00:56:34,115 I got to make spaghetti. 949 00:56:34,154 --> 00:56:36,146 I can't stay here anymore. 950 00:56:38,359 --> 00:56:40,623 Harriet... 951 00:56:40,662 --> 00:56:43,597 sit over there till we decide what to do with you next. 952 00:56:44,867 --> 00:56:46,027 Wait. What's this? 953 00:56:46,068 --> 00:56:47,933 "I learn everything I can 954 00:56:47,970 --> 00:56:50,495 "and I write down everything I see. 955 00:56:50,539 --> 00:56:53,373 "Golly says if I want to be a writer, 956 00:56:53,410 --> 00:56:55,469 "then I'd better start now, 957 00:56:55,512 --> 00:56:56,706 "which is why 958 00:56:56,747 --> 00:56:58,078 I'm a spy." 959 00:57:03,654 --> 00:57:04,882 My position is bad. 960 00:57:04,922 --> 00:57:06,822 My position is terrible. 961 00:57:06,858 --> 00:57:08,827 My position could not be worse. 962 00:57:08,861 --> 00:57:11,523 Golly would know what to do. 963 00:57:14,933 --> 00:57:17,300 Harriet? 964 00:57:18,772 --> 00:57:21,502 Harriet, are you all right? 965 00:57:21,541 --> 00:57:23,372 Fine. 966 00:57:23,409 --> 00:57:24,741 Do you want anything? 967 00:57:24,779 --> 00:57:26,212 No. 968 00:57:26,247 --> 00:57:28,408 You sure? 969 00:57:44,700 --> 00:57:46,930 Ole Golly, Ole Golly, Ole Golly, 970 00:57:46,969 --> 00:57:49,029 Ole Golly, Ole Golly, 971 00:57:49,072 --> 00:57:52,974 Ole Golly, Ole Golly, Ole Golly. 972 00:57:53,010 --> 00:57:55,444 Harriet? 973 00:57:55,479 --> 00:57:56,811 I said 974 00:57:56,848 --> 00:57:57,974 I'm fine. 975 00:57:58,016 --> 00:58:00,109 Really. 976 00:58:20,174 --> 00:58:21,300 Lookit. 977 00:58:21,341 --> 00:58:22,535 Oh, my God. 978 00:58:29,718 --> 00:58:31,743 Hey, Sport. 979 00:58:35,758 --> 00:58:37,749 Janie. 980 00:58:39,729 --> 00:58:41,162 You hear something? 981 00:58:42,164 --> 00:58:44,156 No. 982 00:59:00,719 --> 00:59:02,084 Plug this in over there. 983 00:59:02,121 --> 00:59:03,247 Over there? 984 00:59:03,288 --> 00:59:05,256 Um, well, that one's closer. 985 00:59:05,290 --> 00:59:07,987 Carrie? Carrie? 986 00:59:11,731 --> 00:59:12,959 Oh, my... 987 00:59:19,240 --> 00:59:22,676 Sport? Sport, catch. 988 00:59:44,168 --> 00:59:46,602 Let me see. 989 01:00:00,619 --> 01:00:03,144 We love our teacher, and our best friend 990 01:00:03,189 --> 01:00:05,454 We'll stay together 991 01:00:05,492 --> 01:00:07,153 Until the end 992 01:00:07,194 --> 01:00:09,253 We're moving up... 993 01:00:10,730 --> 01:00:15,259 ...and together, we'll always have fun 994 01:00:15,303 --> 01:00:19,297 We love our teacher, and our best friend 995 01:00:19,341 --> 01:00:21,605 We'll stay together 996 01:00:21,643 --> 01:00:24,612 Until the end 997 01:00:24,646 --> 01:00:28,014 We're one for all, and all for one 998 01:00:28,051 --> 01:00:31,578 And together, we'll always have fun... 999 01:00:41,398 --> 01:00:44,095 I will always have a notebook. 1000 01:00:44,135 --> 01:00:46,126 Only Golly understands this. 1001 01:00:46,171 --> 01:00:48,969 I will write down everything, and I'll know everything. 1002 01:00:49,007 --> 01:00:50,770 And I'll take everything I know, 1003 01:00:50,809 --> 01:00:52,175 and write my memoirs, 1004 01:00:52,211 --> 01:00:53,610 and be a huge, big, celebrity, 1005 01:00:53,646 --> 01:00:54,943 and go on all the talk shows 1006 01:00:54,981 --> 01:00:56,778 and tell them Marion Hawthorne smells. 1007 01:00:56,816 --> 01:01:00,719 And... won't that rock? 1008 01:01:10,064 --> 01:01:11,326 What smells? 1009 01:01:11,366 --> 01:01:12,663 Eww! 1010 01:01:12,700 --> 01:01:13,758 Did something die? 1011 01:01:16,505 --> 01:01:18,496 - Get away. - Eww! 1012 01:01:23,947 --> 01:01:27,178 Where's your notebook, Harriet? 1013 01:01:27,217 --> 01:01:29,481 I don't know, Marion. 1014 01:01:29,519 --> 01:01:32,614 Have you looked up your butt? 1015 01:01:34,058 --> 01:01:36,390 You all better stop being mean to me, 1016 01:01:36,427 --> 01:01:37,985 or else, I'm going to... 1017 01:01:38,029 --> 01:01:39,292 Or else, what? 1018 01:01:39,331 --> 01:01:41,196 Yeah, what are you gonna do about it? 1019 01:01:41,233 --> 01:01:42,757 I'm gonna get you real bad. 1020 01:01:42,801 --> 01:01:43,893 I'm gonna... 1021 01:01:43,936 --> 01:01:47,338 No, that's where you're wrong, Harriet the Spy. 1022 01:01:47,373 --> 01:01:49,671 We're gonna get you so bad... 1023 01:01:49,709 --> 01:01:51,108 and you know why? 1024 01:01:51,144 --> 01:01:52,873 'Cause we have a plan. 1025 01:01:52,912 --> 01:01:53,901 Yeah! 1026 01:02:35,227 --> 01:02:38,355 I don't like giving orders twice, you know. 1027 01:02:38,397 --> 01:02:42,197 I told you to nail it to the side, not to the right. 1028 01:02:42,267 --> 01:02:46,204 One, two, three, heave! 1029 01:02:49,943 --> 01:02:51,502 I need more nails. 1030 01:02:53,180 --> 01:02:56,047 Harder, harder. 1031 01:03:05,227 --> 01:03:07,196 Hold it, hold it. 1032 01:03:10,099 --> 01:03:12,693 A club for catching spies? 1033 01:03:12,735 --> 01:03:15,432 I'm doomed. 1034 01:03:22,279 --> 01:03:25,306 "If Golly said choose between being a spy 1035 01:03:25,350 --> 01:03:27,341 "and having friends... 1036 01:03:31,757 --> 01:03:33,588 I'd pick spy." 1037 01:03:39,433 --> 01:03:41,958 Maybe you're not allowed to have both." 1038 01:03:51,312 --> 01:03:52,301 Ugh! 1039 01:03:54,683 --> 01:03:56,207 Get her! 1040 01:04:21,847 --> 01:04:23,747 Spy-catchers are everywhere. 1041 01:04:23,782 --> 01:04:25,750 My route is ruined. 1042 01:04:25,784 --> 01:04:28,117 No one can stand in my way. 1043 01:04:32,692 --> 01:04:33,954 Forget that my heart sank 1044 01:04:33,993 --> 01:04:36,053 when I saw you standing there with that policeman. 1045 01:04:36,096 --> 01:04:37,188 This is your mother talking. 1046 01:04:37,297 --> 01:04:39,288 But when I ask you for some kind of explanation, 1047 01:04:39,333 --> 01:04:40,300 it's like... 1048 01:04:40,334 --> 01:04:41,301 It's not that big a deal. 1049 01:04:41,335 --> 01:04:42,302 Oh, no... wrong. 1050 01:04:42,336 --> 01:04:43,634 Being brought home by the cops 1051 01:04:43,671 --> 01:04:44,797 is a very big deal, Harriet. 1052 01:04:44,839 --> 01:04:46,466 Cop. Cop. 1053 01:04:46,508 --> 01:04:49,705 One guy. That's it. 1054 01:04:49,744 --> 01:04:51,770 No, that's not it; we've spoken with Miss Elson. 1055 01:04:51,814 --> 01:04:52,906 You remember school? 1056 01:04:52,948 --> 01:04:54,779 And she tells us that you've done 1057 01:04:54,817 --> 01:04:56,148 zero schoolwork in days. 1058 01:04:56,185 --> 01:04:58,312 All you do is play with your notebook. 1059 01:04:58,354 --> 01:05:00,289 It's not play, it's work. 1060 01:05:00,323 --> 01:05:02,621 School is your work, Harriet. 1061 01:05:02,659 --> 01:05:06,653 Yeah, well, she can shut up, 'cause I'm learning tons. 1062 01:05:06,697 --> 01:05:07,664 Oh, yes? 1063 01:05:07,698 --> 01:05:09,256 Well, not about history, huh? 1064 01:05:09,300 --> 01:05:10,324 Not about geography. 1065 01:05:10,368 --> 01:05:11,335 Not even English. 1066 01:05:11,369 --> 01:05:13,360 I swear, if it's not in your notebook, 1067 01:05:13,404 --> 01:05:15,703 it's as if you don't want to know about it. 1068 01:05:15,741 --> 01:05:18,175 So what? 1069 01:05:20,078 --> 01:05:21,602 Harriet... 1070 01:05:27,620 --> 01:05:31,455 This... obsession you've developed 1071 01:05:31,492 --> 01:05:34,154 is not entirely healthy. 1072 01:05:34,195 --> 01:05:37,722 Now, we've made a decision. 1073 01:05:37,765 --> 01:05:38,790 And-And we, uh... 1074 01:05:38,834 --> 01:05:39,926 We want you to stop 1075 01:05:39,968 --> 01:05:41,196 with the notebook. 1076 01:05:45,207 --> 01:05:48,336 S-Stop writing? 1077 01:05:48,377 --> 01:05:52,541 Not forever, just as an experiment. 1078 01:05:52,582 --> 01:05:54,847 Harriet, the world is filled with so many things 1079 01:05:54,885 --> 01:05:56,512 a person like yourself could enjoy. 1080 01:05:56,553 --> 01:05:58,111 Well, that's right. 1081 01:05:58,155 --> 01:06:01,090 And you're going to find that, sometimes 1082 01:06:01,124 --> 01:06:03,958 just experiencing them can be enough. 1083 01:06:03,995 --> 01:06:08,159 That's how I experience things... with my notebook. 1084 01:06:08,266 --> 01:06:09,460 Harriet... 1085 01:06:09,500 --> 01:06:12,368 No. Let's see you experience things 1086 01:06:12,404 --> 01:06:15,635 without your unhealthy obsessions, huh? 1087 01:06:15,674 --> 01:06:18,165 Every day you come home, and pour yourself a big martini. 1088 01:06:18,278 --> 01:06:19,768 How come you don't give that up? 1089 01:06:19,813 --> 01:06:21,804 And how many days go by 1090 01:06:21,848 --> 01:06:23,577 without you going to a stupid party? 1091 01:06:23,617 --> 01:06:26,485 Or buying some other piece of crappy jewelry... like, two? 1092 01:06:26,520 --> 01:06:28,181 Don't take that tone with us, young lady. 1093 01:06:28,289 --> 01:06:30,519 We're your parents. We make the rules in this house. 1094 01:06:30,558 --> 01:06:31,752 Now, hand over the notebook. 1095 01:06:31,792 --> 01:06:33,726 I threw it away. 1096 01:06:33,761 --> 01:06:36,128 You're sitting on it. 1097 01:06:36,164 --> 01:06:38,792 I'm not moving. 1098 01:06:40,302 --> 01:06:42,328 If you make me move you, 1099 01:06:42,372 --> 01:06:44,431 I will move you. 1100 01:07:00,458 --> 01:07:02,824 I'll just get another one. 1101 01:07:02,861 --> 01:07:03,850 Oh? 1102 01:07:03,895 --> 01:07:06,660 Miss Elson will be checking. 1103 01:07:08,834 --> 01:07:10,301 Harriet? 1104 01:07:11,537 --> 01:07:13,505 Don't you want to talk about this? 1105 01:07:13,539 --> 01:07:14,973 No. 1106 01:07:21,148 --> 01:07:25,677 Harriet... did we forget? 1107 01:07:25,720 --> 01:07:29,121 Notebook check. 1108 01:07:39,736 --> 01:07:41,169 Dweeb! 1109 01:08:49,915 --> 01:08:52,509 Hey... 1110 01:09:14,443 --> 01:09:17,469 Harriet the Spy, Harriet the Spy... 1111 01:09:20,816 --> 01:09:24,810 Harriet the Spy, Harriet the Spy... 1112 01:09:29,693 --> 01:09:31,160 Oops! 1113 01:09:32,496 --> 01:09:33,656 I'm sorry! 1114 01:09:33,697 --> 01:09:35,460 You did that on purpose! 1115 01:09:35,499 --> 01:09:37,592 It was an accident, I swear. 1116 01:09:37,634 --> 01:09:39,626 - Here, let me help you. - No! 1117 01:09:44,142 --> 01:09:45,200 Get away! 1118 01:09:45,243 --> 01:09:47,804 Get away! 1119 01:09:49,315 --> 01:09:51,112 That's it, work together, 1120 01:09:51,150 --> 01:09:53,618 and we'll have Harriet cleaned up in no time. 1121 01:09:53,653 --> 01:09:54,813 Don't worry, Harriet, 1122 01:09:54,855 --> 01:09:57,050 we'll all help you. 1123 01:09:57,090 --> 01:09:58,079 No, stop it. 1124 01:09:58,125 --> 01:09:59,615 I don't need your help. 1125 01:09:59,659 --> 01:10:00,887 You all get away! 1126 01:10:00,927 --> 01:10:02,054 No! 1127 01:10:02,096 --> 01:10:04,087 No! 1128 01:10:10,339 --> 01:10:11,806 Harriet! 1129 01:10:11,840 --> 01:10:13,068 Wait! 1130 01:10:13,108 --> 01:10:15,235 Whoa... 1131 01:10:15,277 --> 01:10:17,712 Well, that wasn't very dignified. 1132 01:11:41,874 --> 01:11:45,436 "To be... or not to be... 1133 01:11:45,479 --> 01:11:47,811 "That is the question. 1134 01:11:47,848 --> 01:11:49,611 Wait. 1135 01:11:49,650 --> 01:11:51,481 Is that a question? 1136 01:11:54,155 --> 01:12:00,424 "Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer 1137 01:12:00,461 --> 01:12:02,657 "The slings and arrows 1138 01:12:02,698 --> 01:12:04,893 "Of outrageous fortune 1139 01:12:04,934 --> 01:12:06,765 "Or to take arms 1140 01:12:06,802 --> 01:12:10,204 "Against a sea of terribles 1141 01:12:12,542 --> 01:12:14,237 "And by optioning, end them? 1142 01:12:14,277 --> 01:12:15,244 "To die... 1143 01:12:15,278 --> 01:12:16,404 I want to die. 1144 01:12:16,446 --> 01:12:18,244 "To sleep no more 1145 01:12:18,316 --> 01:12:20,580 "And by a sleep to say 1146 01:12:20,618 --> 01:12:22,609 "We end the heart-chat 1147 01:12:22,653 --> 01:12:24,985 "And the thousand nags of shock... 1148 01:12:25,022 --> 01:12:27,184 "The flesh 1149 01:12:27,225 --> 01:12:30,160 "is here, too... 1150 01:12:30,195 --> 01:12:32,663 "'Tis a consummation 1151 01:12:32,698 --> 01:12:38,137 "Development to be wished 1152 01:12:38,171 --> 01:12:44,907 To die... to sleep no more." 1153 01:12:44,945 --> 01:12:48,608 There are many signs that Tom is changing from a boy to a man. 1154 01:12:48,649 --> 01:12:50,481 Tom is getting a deeper voice 1155 01:12:50,518 --> 01:12:53,282 and sometimes it gives him a little trouble. 1156 01:12:53,321 --> 01:12:54,618 Don't be insulting 1157 01:12:54,656 --> 01:12:56,283 my... friend. 1158 01:12:56,324 --> 01:12:59,886 This is an actual photograph of vocal chords taken through 1159 01:12:59,929 --> 01:13:01,829 a special instrument. 1160 01:13:01,864 --> 01:13:04,230 The chords vibrate when the person breathes out. 1161 01:13:05,502 --> 01:13:08,062 The larynx is here at the top of the windpipe 1162 01:13:08,105 --> 01:13:11,597 and is the housing for the vocal cords. 1163 01:13:36,970 --> 01:13:39,462 Bra on a pole! Bra on a pole! 1164 01:13:47,482 --> 01:13:49,313 Oh, no. 1165 01:14:06,503 --> 01:14:08,562 Hello, Marion. 1166 01:14:08,605 --> 01:14:11,234 Get away from me, Harriet. 1167 01:14:11,276 --> 01:14:15,906 Or what, you gonna tell your father? 1168 01:14:15,947 --> 01:14:18,712 I heard my parents talking. 1169 01:14:19,952 --> 01:14:21,920 You don't have a father. 1170 01:14:21,954 --> 01:14:25,584 All those stories about horseback riding are garbage. 1171 01:14:25,625 --> 01:14:27,752 You made them all up. 1172 01:14:27,794 --> 01:14:30,922 Your father lives in Amsterdam. 1173 01:14:30,964 --> 01:14:34,594 He hasn't seen you in three years. 1174 01:14:34,635 --> 01:14:37,798 And you want to know why, Marion? 1175 01:14:40,308 --> 01:14:43,278 'Cause he doesn't love you. 1176 01:14:43,312 --> 01:14:45,303 Move. 1177 01:15:49,819 --> 01:15:51,980 Harriet? 1178 01:15:53,157 --> 01:15:55,819 Harriet, come down here. 1179 01:15:59,864 --> 01:16:02,732 Harriet, what's happened to you? 1180 01:16:02,768 --> 01:16:06,226 We've gotten calls from every parent at school. 1181 01:16:06,338 --> 01:16:08,329 They're all either furious or terrified. 1182 01:16:08,373 --> 01:16:09,739 Marion Hawthorne can't stop crying. 1183 01:16:09,776 --> 01:16:11,903 Laura Peters has locked herself in the bathroom 1184 01:16:11,945 --> 01:16:13,139 and won't come out. 1185 01:16:13,179 --> 01:16:14,806 The only parents we haven't heard from 1186 01:16:14,847 --> 01:16:15,939 are Pinky Whitehead's. 1187 01:16:17,618 --> 01:16:19,210 I'm not answering that. 1188 01:16:19,253 --> 01:16:20,811 I always hated school myself. 1189 01:16:20,854 --> 01:16:22,116 No, now, see, that's the problem. 1190 01:16:22,156 --> 01:16:23,214 What? I know... 1191 01:16:23,257 --> 01:16:24,885 Something is very wrong here, Ben, and you need 1192 01:16:24,926 --> 01:16:26,120 ...to take this seriously. - I am! 1193 01:16:26,161 --> 01:16:27,560 - No, come on. - I'm just as serious as... 1194 01:16:27,596 --> 01:16:28,585 You know what you're doing. 1195 01:16:28,630 --> 01:16:30,257 - You're coming in and teasing... - No, I'm not. 1196 01:16:30,332 --> 01:16:31,264 We have a really bad situation. 1197 01:16:31,333 --> 01:16:32,733 We don't know what the situation is at all. 1198 01:16:32,768 --> 01:16:34,565 You always come in and make jokes and then I have to come in 1199 01:16:34,604 --> 01:16:35,593 Do we know what the situation is? 1200 01:16:35,638 --> 01:16:36,605 ...and be the grumpy one. 1201 01:16:36,639 --> 01:16:37,765 Maybe we should find out what it is. 1202 01:16:37,807 --> 01:16:40,902 I'm fine, I'm fine... 1203 01:16:40,944 --> 01:16:42,969 I'm fine, I'm fine... 1204 01:16:43,013 --> 01:16:45,106 I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine... 1205 01:16:45,148 --> 01:16:46,740 I'm fine! 1206 01:16:47,784 --> 01:16:49,047 No, sweetheart. 1207 01:16:49,087 --> 01:16:52,147 I can't understand how this is fine. 1208 01:16:53,992 --> 01:16:56,324 Harriet, uh, uh, can you explain this? 1209 01:17:23,125 --> 01:17:25,252 Well, what do we do now? 1210 01:17:25,360 --> 01:17:26,827 We can do anything you like. 1211 01:17:26,862 --> 01:17:28,728 What am I supposed to do? 1212 01:17:28,765 --> 01:17:30,357 How about a game? 1213 01:17:30,400 --> 01:17:32,129 Do you play chess? 1214 01:17:32,168 --> 01:17:34,932 Golly was going to teach me, but... 1215 01:17:34,971 --> 01:17:36,097 Golly? 1216 01:17:36,139 --> 01:17:37,471 Who's he? 1217 01:17:38,809 --> 01:17:40,936 Just somebody. 1218 01:17:42,713 --> 01:17:46,275 You sit here and play with this stuff all day? 1219 01:17:46,351 --> 01:17:47,613 Don't you have toys at home? 1220 01:17:47,652 --> 01:17:48,812 Yeah. 1221 01:17:48,853 --> 01:17:50,252 But I'm 11. 1222 01:18:01,535 --> 01:18:04,436 You stink. 1223 01:18:04,471 --> 01:18:05,870 What are you doing? 1224 01:18:05,906 --> 01:18:07,237 Just taking notes. 1225 01:18:07,274 --> 01:18:08,606 Are they the mean, 1226 01:18:08,643 --> 01:18:13,205 nasty kind... or the regular kind? 1227 01:18:13,247 --> 01:18:15,112 Why? 1228 01:18:15,149 --> 01:18:16,742 Because... 1229 01:18:16,785 --> 01:18:18,082 I'm just telling you, 1230 01:18:18,120 --> 01:18:21,556 it's tough getting away with the nasty kind these days. 1231 01:18:21,590 --> 01:18:23,285 Thanks for the advice. 1232 01:18:24,294 --> 01:18:26,262 Nobody ever takes 1233 01:18:26,329 --> 01:18:28,490 your notebook away from you, I bet. 1234 01:18:29,399 --> 01:18:32,061 Tell you what. 1235 01:18:32,102 --> 01:18:34,571 How about I give you a notebook. 1236 01:18:34,605 --> 01:18:38,439 Would you like that? 1237 01:18:38,476 --> 01:18:40,911 Yeah. Sure. 1238 01:18:40,946 --> 01:18:42,436 This guy's not bad. 1239 01:18:42,481 --> 01:18:44,847 Definitely one of those people 1240 01:18:44,883 --> 01:18:47,545 Golly says deserves a closer look. 1241 01:18:47,586 --> 01:18:51,284 At least he knows the value of a good notebook. 1242 01:18:51,324 --> 01:18:52,848 Harriet? 1243 01:18:52,892 --> 01:18:54,257 Hmm? 1244 01:18:54,293 --> 01:18:55,726 It's time to go. 1245 01:18:56,764 --> 01:18:59,631 Can I keep the notebook? 1246 01:18:59,666 --> 01:19:02,100 I'll have to talk to your parents about that. 1247 01:19:09,444 --> 01:19:11,742 Well, what did he say? 1248 01:19:11,780 --> 01:19:13,510 What did he say? 1249 01:19:13,549 --> 01:19:17,417 Well, he says that, uh, you're fine. 1250 01:19:17,453 --> 01:19:22,255 And, uh, you're a wonderful girl and very smart 1251 01:19:22,292 --> 01:19:25,420 and you'll be a terrific writer some day. 1252 01:19:25,462 --> 01:19:27,953 I could've told you that. 1253 01:19:53,828 --> 01:19:56,388 I didn't read it. 1254 01:19:56,430 --> 01:19:58,295 Good. 1255 01:19:58,332 --> 01:20:00,233 You know, Harriet, 1256 01:20:00,268 --> 01:20:05,171 uh, someday... when you grow up... you might have children. 1257 01:20:06,208 --> 01:20:07,232 Doubt it. 1258 01:20:07,275 --> 01:20:09,574 Well, not tomorrow, 1259 01:20:09,612 --> 01:20:12,137 or soon, but some day. 1260 01:20:12,181 --> 01:20:13,773 Maybe. 1261 01:20:13,816 --> 01:20:15,750 And, if you do, 1262 01:20:15,785 --> 01:20:18,983 you're going to try really hard to understand them. 1263 01:20:19,022 --> 01:20:20,319 But I keep telling you... 1264 01:20:20,390 --> 01:20:22,449 I know, you told me about the notebook. 1265 01:20:22,493 --> 01:20:24,291 And even though you're telling me, 1266 01:20:24,329 --> 01:20:25,921 and even though I'm listening, 1267 01:20:25,964 --> 01:20:28,660 I still don't understand it, Harriet. 1268 01:20:28,700 --> 01:20:32,000 Is that why you took it away? 1269 01:20:32,037 --> 01:20:34,369 We made a mistake. 1270 01:20:37,376 --> 01:20:40,835 Don't do it again, okay? 1271 01:20:40,881 --> 01:20:42,371 We try. 1272 01:20:47,220 --> 01:20:48,347 Mom? 1273 01:20:48,389 --> 01:20:49,515 Yeah? 1274 01:20:49,557 --> 01:20:50,956 Will you tuck me in? 1275 01:20:50,992 --> 01:20:53,222 Sure. 1276 01:20:56,565 --> 01:20:58,829 There we go. 1277 01:21:07,210 --> 01:21:08,541 Green. 1278 01:21:08,578 --> 01:21:10,045 G-R-E-E-N. 1279 01:21:10,079 --> 01:21:12,810 Aren't you going to work on your notebook today? 1280 01:21:12,850 --> 01:21:13,942 Yeah. Pick a number. 1281 01:21:14,985 --> 01:21:16,213 Seven. 1282 01:21:16,253 --> 01:21:19,051 One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. 1283 01:21:19,089 --> 01:21:20,614 All right. 1284 01:21:21,660 --> 01:21:23,628 "Turn around." 1285 01:21:23,662 --> 01:21:25,254 That's not a fortune. 1286 01:21:25,297 --> 01:21:26,662 Turn around. 1287 01:21:26,698 --> 01:21:28,564 Why? 1288 01:21:28,601 --> 01:21:30,660 Turn around. 1289 01:21:30,703 --> 01:21:33,035 Golly? 1290 01:21:34,373 --> 01:21:35,932 Golly! 1291 01:21:47,055 --> 01:21:48,682 Why, Harriet the Spy, 1292 01:21:48,723 --> 01:21:50,520 I believe you've grown a full inch. 1293 01:21:50,558 --> 01:21:52,857 Nuh-uh. 1294 01:21:52,895 --> 01:21:54,692 You certainly have grown. 1295 01:21:54,730 --> 01:21:56,630 Oh, Golly! 1296 01:21:57,666 --> 01:22:00,465 So what do I do now, Golly? 1297 01:22:00,503 --> 01:22:03,529 "Beauty is truth, truth beauty. 1298 01:22:03,573 --> 01:22:05,302 "That is all ye know on Earth 1299 01:22:05,408 --> 01:22:06,636 and all ye need to know." 1300 01:22:06,676 --> 01:22:08,304 John Keats. 1301 01:22:08,412 --> 01:22:10,277 What is that supposed to mean? 1302 01:22:10,314 --> 01:22:11,872 It means you've got trouble. 1303 01:22:11,916 --> 01:22:13,508 You wrote down the truth in your notebook, 1304 01:22:13,551 --> 01:22:15,713 and your friends, who weren't supposed to see it, did. 1305 01:22:15,754 --> 01:22:17,654 Now there are only two things for you to do, 1306 01:22:17,689 --> 01:22:19,816 and you're not going to like either one of them. 1307 01:22:19,858 --> 01:22:22,190 Like what? 1308 01:22:22,227 --> 01:22:26,426 Well, you have to apologize and you have to lie. 1309 01:22:26,466 --> 01:22:29,264 But you said never to lie. 1310 01:22:29,302 --> 01:22:31,669 I know, I did. 1311 01:22:31,705 --> 01:22:34,503 Let me see how I can explain this. 1312 01:22:34,541 --> 01:22:39,240 Sometimes a little lie that makes people feel better 1313 01:22:39,279 --> 01:22:41,339 isn't really wrong. 1314 01:22:41,383 --> 01:22:43,851 You know, like, you can thank someone 1315 01:22:43,885 --> 01:22:46,547 for a meal they cooked you, even if you hated it. 1316 01:22:46,588 --> 01:22:48,716 You could tell a sick friend that they look better, 1317 01:22:48,758 --> 01:22:51,056 even if they don't. 1318 01:22:51,093 --> 01:22:55,223 Sometimes a really small lie can be a really big help. 1319 01:22:55,264 --> 01:22:58,826 They tried to squash me like a bug. 1320 01:22:58,869 --> 01:23:00,996 It's too hard. 1321 01:23:01,038 --> 01:23:02,767 It's not worth it. 1322 01:23:02,806 --> 01:23:05,537 Aw, never say that, Harriet. 1323 01:23:05,576 --> 01:23:06,975 You're worth it. 1324 01:23:07,011 --> 01:23:09,002 You're an individual, and you know something? 1325 01:23:09,047 --> 01:23:10,537 That makes people nervous. 1326 01:23:10,581 --> 01:23:12,982 And it's going to keep making people nervous your whole life. 1327 01:23:13,018 --> 01:23:14,315 My whole life? 1328 01:23:14,386 --> 01:23:15,478 Yep. 1329 01:23:15,521 --> 01:23:17,216 What do I do? 1330 01:23:17,256 --> 01:23:19,851 You stay true to Harriet and you accept the cost. 1331 01:23:19,893 --> 01:23:21,019 Now, come on. 1332 01:23:21,061 --> 01:23:23,325 That's enough lessons for today, okay? 1333 01:23:23,396 --> 01:23:25,091 You're 11. 1334 01:23:25,131 --> 01:23:27,999 I think it's time for you to start writing something 1335 01:23:28,035 --> 01:23:29,969 other than notes. 1336 01:23:30,004 --> 01:23:31,528 Like what? 1337 01:23:31,572 --> 01:23:33,233 You'll think of something. 1338 01:23:33,274 --> 01:23:36,676 Can't you come back for just a little while? 1339 01:23:36,712 --> 01:23:40,307 Oh, no, I never go back. Only forward. 1340 01:23:40,348 --> 01:23:42,441 And you know what else? 1341 01:23:42,484 --> 01:23:44,885 Good friends are one of life's blessings. 1342 01:23:44,921 --> 01:23:47,219 Don't give them up without a fight. 1343 01:23:58,970 --> 01:24:02,463 Replicate. Replicate. 1344 01:24:04,043 --> 01:24:05,305 Stupid spores. 1345 01:24:05,344 --> 01:24:06,902 Hi, Janie. 1346 01:24:07,914 --> 01:24:09,541 Look what you made me do. 1347 01:24:09,582 --> 01:24:11,140 This stuff is going to eat 1348 01:24:11,184 --> 01:24:12,651 right through the floor. 1349 01:24:12,686 --> 01:24:17,624 Three months of incubation down the porcelain pee hole. 1350 01:24:19,427 --> 01:24:22,863 If you roll the rug over it, it won't show so much. 1351 01:24:22,897 --> 01:24:25,765 Oh, so next time you can ruin the rug? 1352 01:24:25,801 --> 01:24:26,893 No. 1353 01:24:26,935 --> 01:24:28,459 Then why are you here? 1354 01:24:28,503 --> 01:24:30,869 I just want to say that... 1355 01:24:30,906 --> 01:24:33,933 What? 1356 01:24:33,977 --> 01:24:36,036 Forget it. 1357 01:24:36,079 --> 01:24:37,671 Fine. 1358 01:24:37,714 --> 01:24:39,307 Forget it. 1359 01:24:49,060 --> 01:24:52,359 I'm sorry, Janie, okay? 1360 01:24:52,464 --> 01:24:55,263 I'm sorry. 1361 01:24:59,905 --> 01:25:01,532 Will you take a look at this. 1362 01:25:01,574 --> 01:25:02,871 Huh? Huh? 1363 01:25:02,908 --> 01:25:05,207 What do you think of your old man now, Sport? 1364 01:25:05,245 --> 01:25:08,180 10,000 smackaroos. 1365 01:25:11,018 --> 01:25:13,249 No more paying with change. 1366 01:25:13,287 --> 01:25:16,051 No more, no more spaghetti. 1367 01:25:16,090 --> 01:25:17,853 Going to feel like steak. 1368 01:25:17,892 --> 01:25:20,054 And you know those fancy basketball sneakers 1369 01:25:20,095 --> 01:25:22,086 with the, with the buckles and the Velcro 1370 01:25:22,131 --> 01:25:23,496 and the crap all over them? 1371 01:25:23,532 --> 01:25:25,762 Their yours, buddy boy, all yours. 1372 01:25:31,374 --> 01:25:32,341 Hello? 1373 01:25:32,442 --> 01:25:33,466 Murray. 1374 01:25:33,510 --> 01:25:35,342 Hey, hey, I take it all back. 1375 01:25:35,446 --> 01:25:37,175 All agents aren't useless. 1376 01:25:37,214 --> 01:25:39,512 Oh, I'm kidding you, I'm kidding you, man. 1377 01:25:40,718 --> 01:25:42,151 You know I was always in your corner. 1378 01:25:42,186 --> 01:25:43,449 Oh, yeah, I knew you'd come through. 1379 01:25:43,488 --> 01:25:44,546 Well, Sport and I are gonna do 1380 01:25:44,589 --> 01:25:45,613 a little celebrating today... 1381 01:25:45,657 --> 01:25:49,184 - Hey. - Hey. 1382 01:25:49,227 --> 01:25:51,560 Sold his book? 1383 01:25:51,597 --> 01:25:53,360 Got a real job. 1384 01:25:53,466 --> 01:25:55,491 Hey, Harriet, you hear the good news? 1385 01:25:55,535 --> 01:25:56,729 You're a writer. 1386 01:25:57,970 --> 01:25:59,768 So how's it feel? 1387 01:25:59,807 --> 01:26:02,105 Oh, big slice off heaven, 1388 01:26:02,142 --> 01:26:03,973 side order of fries. 1389 01:26:04,011 --> 01:26:05,603 Say, you hungry? 1390 01:26:05,646 --> 01:26:07,444 I feel like going to the fanciest, 1391 01:26:07,482 --> 01:26:09,143 schmanciest restaurant in town. 1392 01:26:09,184 --> 01:26:10,412 We'll abuse the waiter. 1393 01:26:10,452 --> 01:26:11,680 Who's with me? Harriet? 1394 01:26:11,719 --> 01:26:12,913 She can't come. 1395 01:26:12,954 --> 01:26:14,546 What do you mean, she can't come? 1396 01:26:14,589 --> 01:26:15,887 You haven't even asked her. 1397 01:26:15,925 --> 01:26:18,052 I said she can't come. 1398 01:26:21,397 --> 01:26:23,525 You can't be my friend if you're not my friend. 1399 01:26:30,540 --> 01:26:33,305 I'm sorry, Sport. 1400 01:26:33,344 --> 01:26:36,074 I'm sorry. 1401 01:26:43,989 --> 01:26:48,484 No one will forgive me. 1402 01:26:48,528 --> 01:26:51,861 Things will never be the same. 1403 01:27:07,115 --> 01:27:10,778 I have nothing left to lose. 1404 01:27:13,256 --> 01:27:15,747 Someone told me the only reason 1405 01:27:15,791 --> 01:27:18,123 you guys play with me is because of my mom's cake. 1406 01:27:18,161 --> 01:27:21,029 Well, it is very good cake. 1407 01:27:23,934 --> 01:27:28,133 Yeah, but how come we get these pieces and you get those? 1408 01:27:28,173 --> 01:27:30,141 We told you, we're officers. 1409 01:27:30,175 --> 01:27:31,699 And we need our strength. 1410 01:27:31,743 --> 01:27:33,643 You get to fix the clubhouse. 1411 01:27:35,214 --> 01:27:36,841 Somebody's dreaming. 1412 01:27:36,882 --> 01:27:39,646 I am so bored. 1413 01:27:39,685 --> 01:27:41,585 If you don't like it, you can leave. 1414 01:27:41,620 --> 01:27:43,680 Hey, you're right. 1415 01:27:47,360 --> 01:27:48,987 Wait up. 1416 01:27:49,029 --> 01:27:51,089 Anybody sick of listening to her 1417 01:27:51,132 --> 01:27:52,963 ought to get a life. 1418 01:27:54,402 --> 01:27:56,870 Okay, but you can't come back! 1419 01:27:56,904 --> 01:27:59,339 We're voting! It's official! 1420 01:28:26,638 --> 01:28:28,799 Shh! Teacher! There she is. 1421 01:28:30,175 --> 01:28:31,336 Good morning. 1422 01:28:31,377 --> 01:28:32,742 Today, we are... 1423 01:28:32,778 --> 01:28:34,712 Yes, Harriet? 1424 01:28:39,620 --> 01:28:42,851 Miss Elson, I've been thinking a lot, 1425 01:28:42,889 --> 01:28:44,447 and you know how class president 1426 01:28:44,491 --> 01:28:48,758 automatically gets to be editor of the sixth grade newspaper? 1427 01:28:48,796 --> 01:28:51,856 Yes. 1428 01:28:51,899 --> 01:28:57,236 Well, I think... 1429 01:28:57,273 --> 01:29:00,174 I think that it's too much for one person 1430 01:29:00,209 --> 01:29:02,974 and that it's not fair to everybody 1431 01:29:03,013 --> 01:29:06,278 because everybody deserves a chance. 1432 01:29:08,485 --> 01:29:10,453 And... 1433 01:29:12,757 --> 01:29:14,816 And we should change it. 1434 01:29:14,859 --> 01:29:16,486 Objection! 1435 01:29:16,527 --> 01:29:18,188 This isn't a courtroom, Marion. 1436 01:29:19,765 --> 01:29:22,928 I like that idea, Harriet. 1437 01:29:22,968 --> 01:29:24,697 Let's see what the class thinks. 1438 01:29:24,736 --> 01:29:26,328 Miss Elson, I think 1439 01:29:26,405 --> 01:29:28,704 I speak for everyone when I say 1440 01:29:28,741 --> 01:29:32,438 this is, this is a really, really stupid idea. 1441 01:29:32,478 --> 01:29:34,105 That is one opinion. 1442 01:29:35,649 --> 01:29:37,742 But let's take a vote. 1443 01:29:37,785 --> 01:29:41,949 Marion is now editor of the Guidepost. 1444 01:29:41,989 --> 01:29:45,824 Would anyone like to nominate another candidate? 1445 01:29:52,902 --> 01:29:57,805 Well, I guess if no one has anything to say... 1446 01:29:59,743 --> 01:30:02,268 I have something to say. 1447 01:30:08,653 --> 01:30:13,647 I think that Harriet's a very good writer and... 1448 01:30:13,691 --> 01:30:17,219 if we only listen to one person's opinion 1449 01:30:17,262 --> 01:30:19,958 we may never get anywhere new. 1450 01:30:19,998 --> 01:30:23,833 But Harriet might have something very original 1451 01:30:23,870 --> 01:30:26,668 and I'd like to read what she has to write. 1452 01:30:31,846 --> 01:30:34,713 Is there a second? 1453 01:30:34,749 --> 01:30:37,183 I second it. 1454 01:30:42,657 --> 01:30:44,716 I third it. 1455 01:30:48,564 --> 01:30:49,895 Okay, then. 1456 01:30:49,932 --> 01:30:53,766 Harriet Welsch is now a candidate for editor. 1457 01:30:55,305 --> 01:30:56,932 Who votes for Harriet? 1458 01:31:28,342 --> 01:31:31,573 That... is that. 1459 01:31:31,612 --> 01:31:33,944 Yes. 1460 01:31:57,174 --> 01:31:59,143 I am on a mission to be a great writer. 1461 01:32:01,279 --> 01:32:02,712 A good friend once told me 1462 01:32:02,747 --> 01:32:06,240 that all great writers try to see everything. 1463 01:32:06,285 --> 01:32:09,220 Okay, here goes: 1464 01:32:09,255 --> 01:32:12,190 I knew this guy once. 1465 01:32:12,225 --> 01:32:14,387 He used to be a bajillionaire. 1466 01:32:14,428 --> 01:32:16,487 Now he rides a bike. 1467 01:32:16,530 --> 01:32:19,158 Want to know the freaky part? 1468 01:32:21,468 --> 01:32:23,835 He says the bike's better. 1469 01:32:23,872 --> 01:32:26,432 Please write in if you think he's lying. 1470 01:32:31,580 --> 01:32:35,539 There's a difference between looking at stuff 1471 01:32:35,584 --> 01:32:37,882 and really seeing it. 1472 01:32:39,890 --> 01:32:41,517 Look who's here. 1473 01:32:41,558 --> 01:32:43,185 Give them some bread, huh? 1474 01:32:43,226 --> 01:32:45,057 Here you are. 1475 01:32:45,095 --> 01:32:47,428 To really see, 1476 01:32:47,498 --> 01:32:49,989 you've got to get a closer look. 1477 01:32:51,068 --> 01:32:52,092 Why, thank you. 1478 01:32:52,136 --> 01:32:53,103 So much. 1479 01:32:53,137 --> 01:32:54,366 A cabbage. 1480 01:32:54,406 --> 01:32:57,170 Carrots in here for you. 1481 01:32:57,209 --> 01:32:58,699 And a sausage. 1482 01:33:13,427 --> 01:33:15,395 I've noticed that, sometimes, 1483 01:33:15,429 --> 01:33:18,365 stuff you think is broken forever 1484 01:33:18,400 --> 01:33:21,836 is actually totally fixable. 1485 01:33:23,872 --> 01:33:28,207 But some stuff is supposed to fall apart. 1486 01:33:28,244 --> 01:33:29,302 Speaking of which, 1487 01:33:29,345 --> 01:33:32,143 certain high ranking officials of a certain 1488 01:33:32,181 --> 01:33:34,742 secret club had better de-dorkify themselves 1489 01:33:34,785 --> 01:33:36,412 in a hurry... 1490 01:33:37,187 --> 01:33:39,018 or else everybody's going back 1491 01:33:39,056 --> 01:33:41,422 to where they were in the first place. 1492 01:33:41,458 --> 01:33:43,427 This reporter believes 1493 01:33:43,494 --> 01:33:46,725 that de-dorkification is a difficult, 1494 01:33:46,764 --> 01:33:48,664 but not impossible, process. 1495 01:33:48,700 --> 01:33:51,101 Mostly, you've got to want to be cured. 1496 01:33:54,573 --> 01:33:58,977 But I'm pretty sure it's a two steps forward, 1497 01:33:59,012 --> 01:34:02,038 one step back kind of deal. 1498 01:34:02,082 --> 01:34:05,540 In theater news, Miss Elson's sixth grade holiday pageant 1499 01:34:05,585 --> 01:34:09,886 was the theatrical controversy of the season. 1500 01:34:10,925 --> 01:34:13,291 Some were happy to see it, 1501 01:34:13,327 --> 01:34:15,319 and who am I to argue? 1502 01:34:31,382 --> 01:34:34,613 Others say... it stunk. 1503 01:34:38,223 --> 01:34:40,851 This reporter has no comment. 1504 01:34:40,892 --> 01:34:42,792 And, hey, stupid school board, 1505 01:34:42,827 --> 01:34:45,523 give Miss Elson a raise, would you? 1506 01:34:46,565 --> 01:34:49,329 She's not so bad, as teachers go. 1507 01:34:49,368 --> 01:34:52,064 And she puts up with a lot. 1508 01:34:53,306 --> 01:34:55,798 There's evidence to suggest that Janie Gibbs 1509 01:34:55,842 --> 01:34:58,743 will grow up to be the world's greatest scientist. 1510 01:34:58,779 --> 01:35:02,113 So far, she has shown amazing progress in the areas 1511 01:35:02,150 --> 01:35:05,244 of mold manipulation and chemical combustibles. 1512 01:35:05,286 --> 01:35:08,312 We have also learned that Sport's father 1513 01:35:08,356 --> 01:35:10,552 is rolling in dough from his latest book, 1514 01:35:10,592 --> 01:35:13,060 which just goes to show, if you stick to what you love... 1515 01:35:13,095 --> 01:35:16,724 and work like a dog... you will succeed. 1516 01:35:16,765 --> 01:35:19,394 For those of you who don't know, a retraction 1517 01:35:19,502 --> 01:35:21,970 is when a newspaper takes something back. 1518 01:35:22,005 --> 01:35:25,601 This newspaper would like to retract certain statements 1519 01:35:25,643 --> 01:35:26,803 in a certain notebook 1520 01:35:26,844 --> 01:35:29,244 which may have hurt certain people's feelings. 1521 01:35:29,280 --> 01:35:30,406 They were lies. 1522 01:35:30,448 --> 01:35:32,746 And those that weren't lies... 1523 01:35:32,783 --> 01:35:34,411 were mean. 1524 01:35:34,453 --> 01:35:37,616 Like, just because a person's father is far away 1525 01:35:37,656 --> 01:35:39,954 does not mean he doesn't love you. 1526 01:35:39,991 --> 01:35:41,584 Anyway, don't think about it. 1527 01:35:44,997 --> 01:35:46,362 The truth is important, 1528 01:35:46,399 --> 01:35:49,858 but so are your friends. 1529 01:35:51,805 --> 01:35:56,435 And if you can have them both, then it's a good life. 1530 01:35:56,477 --> 01:36:02,212 Until next issue, I remain your faithful correspondent, 1531 01:36:02,250 --> 01:36:08,986 Harriet M. Welsch. 1532 01:36:13,497 --> 01:36:15,328 Get up offa that thing 1533 01:36:15,365 --> 01:36:18,266 And dance till you feel better 1534 01:36:18,301 --> 01:36:19,393 Get up offa that thing 1535 01:36:19,469 --> 01:36:21,836 And dance till you... sing it now 1536 01:36:21,873 --> 01:36:23,898 Get up offa that thing 1537 01:36:23,941 --> 01:36:25,966 And dance till you feel better 1538 01:36:26,010 --> 01:36:28,240 Get up offa that thing 1539 01:36:28,279 --> 01:36:29,975 Just try to release that pressure 1540 01:36:30,015 --> 01:36:31,414 Get up offa that thing 1541 01:36:31,450 --> 01:36:34,248 And shake till you feel better 1542 01:36:34,286 --> 01:36:35,776 Get up offa that thing 1543 01:36:35,821 --> 01:36:37,414 And shake... say it now 1544 01:36:37,457 --> 01:36:40,085 Get up offa that thing 1545 01:36:40,126 --> 01:36:41,593 And shake till you feel better 1546 01:36:41,628 --> 01:36:43,425 Get up offa that thing 1547 01:36:43,463 --> 01:36:45,989 Try to release that pressure 1548 01:36:46,033 --> 01:36:47,591 Get up off... 1549 01:36:47,635 --> 01:36:49,432 Huh 1550 01:36:49,470 --> 01:36:50,596 Good God 1551 01:36:50,638 --> 01:36:52,401 So good 1552 01:36:54,209 --> 01:36:55,176 Uhh 1553 01:36:55,210 --> 01:36:57,075 Everybody ready? 1554 01:37:00,315 --> 01:37:01,613 Follow me 1555 01:37:01,651 --> 01:37:04,211 Get up offa that thing 1556 01:37:04,253 --> 01:37:06,551 And shake till you feel better 1557 01:37:06,589 --> 01:37:08,022 Get up offa that thing 1558 01:37:08,057 --> 01:37:09,548 And shake till you... say it now 1559 01:37:09,593 --> 01:37:12,027 Get up offa that thing 1560 01:37:12,062 --> 01:37:14,530 And shake till you feel better 1561 01:37:14,565 --> 01:37:16,795 Get up offa that thing 1562 01:37:16,834 --> 01:37:18,564 Just try to release that pressure 1563 01:37:18,603 --> 01:37:20,161 Get up offa that thing 1564 01:37:20,205 --> 01:37:22,366 And shake till you feel better 1565 01:37:22,407 --> 01:37:24,568 Get up offa that thing 1566 01:37:24,609 --> 01:37:27,010 And shake till you... sing it now 1567 01:37:27,046 --> 01:37:29,378 Get up offa that thing 1568 01:37:29,415 --> 01:37:30,973 And shake till you feel better 1569 01:37:31,016 --> 01:37:33,178 Get up offa that thing 1570 01:37:33,220 --> 01:37:34,778 Ooh... so good 1571 01:37:41,262 --> 01:37:42,422 Huh! 1572 01:37:42,530 --> 01:37:43,861 Whoo-hoo! 1573 01:37:51,273 --> 01:37:53,366 Get up offa that thing 1574 01:37:53,408 --> 01:37:54,375 Eew, a stink bomb! 1575 01:37:54,409 --> 01:37:56,809 Get up offa that thing 1576 01:37:59,015 --> 01:38:01,279 Get up offa that thing 1577 01:38:01,317 --> 01:38:03,376 Dance till you feel better 1578 01:38:03,486 --> 01:38:05,387 Get up offa that thing 1579 01:38:05,489 --> 01:38:07,047 Just try to release that pressure 1580 01:38:07,091 --> 01:38:08,251 Wait a minute 1581 01:38:11,595 --> 01:38:13,689 Funky 1582 01:38:14,733 --> 01:38:17,395 I need it. 1583 01:38:40,129 --> 01:38:42,927 A crack in the door 1584 01:38:42,965 --> 01:38:46,231 A slit in the vines 1585 01:38:46,269 --> 01:38:49,432 A hole in the fence 1586 01:38:49,472 --> 01:38:51,440 So easy to find 1587 01:38:51,474 --> 01:38:57,778 People doing people things 1588 01:38:57,815 --> 01:39:04,380 Whatever that might be 1589 01:39:04,423 --> 01:39:11,227 They go on about their business 1590 01:39:11,264 --> 01:39:17,568 Too wrapped up to see 1591 01:39:17,605 --> 01:39:21,063 In the shadows 1592 01:39:21,108 --> 01:39:26,911 My unblinking eye 1593 01:39:26,948 --> 01:39:32,443 I love... the secretive life 1594 01:39:36,959 --> 01:39:40,087 I hide in the park, behind a bush 1595 01:39:40,129 --> 01:39:42,098 I see runners and skaters 1596 01:39:42,132 --> 01:39:46,762 And a half naked man showing off his tattoos 1597 01:39:46,803 --> 01:39:50,262 And I see old Mr. Gray in his bad toupee 1598 01:39:50,308 --> 01:39:53,436 With some dumb girl about half his age 1599 01:39:53,478 --> 01:39:59,782 - People doing people things - Definitely not his wife 1600 01:39:59,818 --> 01:40:06,622 Are calling out to me 1601 01:40:06,660 --> 01:40:12,793 All their grand and foolish schemes 1602 01:40:12,833 --> 01:40:19,796 It's better than TV 1603 01:40:19,840 --> 01:40:29,149 They're so funny, I could almost cry 1604 01:40:29,185 --> 01:40:35,488 I love... the secretive life 1605 01:40:35,525 --> 01:40:38,984 There's Johnny's dad on his third martini 1606 01:40:39,029 --> 01:40:40,826 And his nose is getting bigger 1607 01:40:40,864 --> 01:40:44,322 As I watch him through the kitchen window 1608 01:40:44,368 --> 01:40:48,999 They really oughta close those blinds 1609 01:40:49,040 --> 01:40:52,009 And under my coat, I got a microrecorder 1610 01:40:52,043 --> 01:40:55,502 A pad, and a pencil, and a picture of you 1611 01:40:55,548 --> 01:40:58,847 I can't believe you did that 1612 01:40:58,884 --> 01:41:01,786 I see two love birds walking by 1613 01:41:01,822 --> 01:41:05,121 With that sick and dreamy look in their eye 1614 01:41:05,158 --> 01:41:08,788 And there's a big fat cop with a Magnum mustache 1615 01:41:08,830 --> 01:41:12,459 Trying so hard to look mean 1616 01:41:12,500 --> 01:41:15,333 The secretive life 105548