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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:53,650 --> 00:00:58,620 -This is "Dude Bro Party Massacre III." 2 00:00:58,630 --> 00:01:00,190 -What you doing, buddy? 3 00:01:00,190 --> 00:01:02,160 You mowing the lawn? 4 00:01:47,070 --> 00:01:49,670 - D-u-u-ude! 5 00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:53,080 -Br-o-o-o-o! 6 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:56,680 -P-a-a-arty! 7 00:01:56,680 --> 00:01:58,950 - Massacre! 8 00:01:58,950 --> 00:02:01,950 -Three. 9 00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:03,920 Three times this week you've been in here, 10 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:07,190 and you've yet to tell me why you keep saying "massacre." 11 00:02:07,190 --> 00:02:08,730 -It was just so painful. 12 00:02:08,730 --> 00:02:10,190 There was so much blood. 13 00:02:10,200 --> 00:02:13,060 -Brock... 14 00:02:13,070 --> 00:02:15,200 This is a safe place. 15 00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:16,900 I need you to open up. 16 00:02:19,170 --> 00:02:21,240 This is about those two previous mass murders 17 00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:23,070 on Frat Row, isn't it? 18 00:02:23,080 --> 00:02:25,580 I don't know if I can talk about that. 19 00:02:25,580 --> 00:02:27,610 It's just... 20 00:02:27,610 --> 00:02:28,280 so painful. 21 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:30,110 Okay. I'll try. 22 00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:31,820 The first party massacre started 23 00:02:31,820 --> 00:02:34,850 with a panty raid gone wrong. 24 00:02:34,850 --> 00:02:37,820 The sorority house mother was pissed. 25 00:02:37,820 --> 00:02:40,630 No one taught her how to open doors. 26 00:02:40,630 --> 00:02:42,630 But she learned. 27 00:02:42,630 --> 00:02:45,660 And she was out for revenge. 28 00:02:45,670 --> 00:02:47,930 -Oh! Little help, bro? 29 00:02:47,930 --> 00:02:50,170 Wh-- Wha-- Oh, no! 30 00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:52,070 -Road Doggie was her first victim. 31 00:02:52,070 --> 00:02:54,040 -Daddy's bro. Ugh... 32 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:56,640 -Next, she went after Cindy and C-Trunk. 33 00:02:56,640 --> 00:02:57,780 -Oh, C-Trunk. 34 00:02:57,780 --> 00:02:59,180 Oh, C-Trunk! 35 00:03:01,850 --> 00:03:04,320 -What's taking you bros so long to shower?! 36 00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:05,980 -But when she killed Coach Handsey, 37 00:03:05,990 --> 00:03:07,220 I had to wonder... -Aah! 38 00:03:07,220 --> 00:03:08,150 -...was she on our side? 39 00:03:08,150 --> 00:03:09,690 -Good throw. 40 00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:10,820 -She wasn't! -Aah! 41 00:03:10,820 --> 00:03:12,020 -Whoa! -Ohh! 42 00:03:12,030 --> 00:03:13,820 -She hunted us down! 43 00:03:15,090 --> 00:03:18,000 Frat Row was no longer a street. 44 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:19,800 It was...a river... 45 00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:21,630 -Ohh! -...of blood! 46 00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:30,110 It was the death of Scooter that rallied us together. 47 00:03:30,110 --> 00:03:33,710 -Aah! 48 00:03:33,710 --> 00:03:36,210 -The house mother was dead, see? 49 00:03:36,220 --> 00:03:39,250 And I became a full Delta Bi Theta. 50 00:03:39,250 --> 00:03:41,220 But little did we know... 51 00:03:41,220 --> 00:03:43,690 mother had a daughter. 52 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:48,790 Anyway, junior year, we raged even harder. 53 00:03:50,300 --> 00:03:52,700 We thought we were gonna live forever. 54 00:03:52,700 --> 00:03:53,730 -And then fire... 55 00:03:53,730 --> 00:03:54,970 -We were wrong. 56 00:03:54,970 --> 00:03:56,870 -Could you hold my hair back, bro? 57 00:03:56,870 --> 00:03:59,370 -Someone took her place. 58 00:04:02,270 --> 00:04:04,240 Motherface. 59 00:04:04,240 --> 00:04:08,010 The junior-year streaking contest was under way. 60 00:04:08,010 --> 00:04:09,310 I was supposed to officiate, 61 00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,750 but I couldn't go because I got pink eye. 62 00:04:11,750 --> 00:04:15,350 That fart on my face saved my life. 63 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:25,000 Too bad I couldn't say the same for Jimmy Galoshes. 64 00:04:31,100 --> 00:04:34,140 No one was safe from her wrath... 65 00:04:34,140 --> 00:04:35,940 -Yeah. "Areolas." Gonna masturbate. 66 00:04:35,940 --> 00:04:37,170 -...not even Little Spoon. 67 00:04:37,180 --> 00:04:39,010 -Aah. 68 00:04:39,010 --> 00:04:42,010 -Not Timmy and Tommy, the Birdstone twins. 69 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:47,050 -Look, babe -- no hands! 70 00:04:47,050 --> 00:04:49,990 Not concert pianist Chaz Noodlemen. 71 00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:50,920 -Aah! Aah! Aah! 72 00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:53,090 -Aah! Aah! 73 00:04:54,760 --> 00:04:57,660 -Not even our weed dealer. 74 00:04:57,660 --> 00:04:59,430 There was no way to deal with the stress. 75 00:05:00,330 --> 00:05:02,300 -Aaaah! 76 00:05:02,300 --> 00:05:04,370 -Randall went on to have three kids. 77 00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:06,040 He seems happy. I'm actually grabbing lunch 78 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:07,200 with him tomorrow. 79 00:05:07,210 --> 00:05:11,080 But then she killed Dolphman. 80 00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:13,810 It was Delta Bi genocide. 81 00:05:13,810 --> 00:05:15,180 But in the end, 82 00:05:15,180 --> 00:05:17,820 thanks to our good looks and bond of brotherhood, 83 00:05:17,820 --> 00:05:21,350 the Delta Bis triumphed once more. 84 00:05:21,350 --> 00:05:25,020 -Looks like your flame... retarded. 85 00:05:25,020 --> 00:05:27,930 -I projected an air of cool, calm confidence, 86 00:05:27,930 --> 00:05:29,360 'cause I'm Brock, you know? 87 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:31,100 But something in her eyes -- 88 00:05:31,100 --> 00:05:34,470 something told me that nothing could stop Motherface. 89 00:05:35,470 --> 00:05:38,370 ...not even the grave. 90 00:05:39,810 --> 00:05:41,210 -Brock! 91 00:05:41,210 --> 00:05:43,740 The serial killer known as Motherface is dead. 92 00:05:43,740 --> 00:05:45,840 You told me you killed her yourself. 93 00:05:45,850 --> 00:05:47,750 It's time you take your life... 94 00:05:48,980 --> 00:05:51,050 ...back. 95 00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:52,720 -Thank God my twin brother Brent 96 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:55,420 didn't want to get involved in the Greek system. 97 00:05:55,420 --> 00:05:57,420 We used to be so close. 98 00:05:57,420 --> 00:05:58,990 We haven't talked that much since we went 99 00:05:58,990 --> 00:06:02,230 to different colleges, but I still... 100 00:06:02,230 --> 00:06:04,200 feel him... 101 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:06,160 like we have some sort of... 102 00:06:06,170 --> 00:06:09,000 psychological connection. 103 00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:13,370 -Brock, I need you to tell me what you're most afraid of. 104 00:06:13,370 --> 00:06:16,140 -Besides seeing all my bros killed before my very eyes? 105 00:06:16,140 --> 00:06:17,270 -Yes, besides that. 106 00:06:17,280 --> 00:06:20,310 Please, tell me everything. 107 00:06:20,310 --> 00:06:22,080 -I don't know. 108 00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:24,080 After watching 17 of my best friends 109 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:26,820 get killed by some crazy lady, 110 00:06:26,820 --> 00:06:29,790 I guess you could say I'm a little bit afraid of women. 111 00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:31,060 -Well, then it looks like we're gonna have to 112 00:06:31,060 --> 00:06:32,920 cut this session short. 113 00:06:32,930 --> 00:06:34,490 -Oh, I thought we were making good progress. 114 00:06:34,490 --> 00:06:36,330 Really? What are you doing?! 115 00:07:00,250 --> 00:07:02,990 -Aah! Damn it, Brock Chirino, you punk! 116 00:07:02,990 --> 00:07:04,390 You're gonna kill someone with that thing! 117 00:07:04,390 --> 00:07:08,090 -No. Ernest, that's Brent Chirino, 118 00:07:08,090 --> 00:07:09,460 Brock's twin brother. 119 00:07:09,460 --> 00:07:11,160 He transferred here after Brock was killed 120 00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:14,970 in that brutal freak accident. -Oh. 121 00:07:14,970 --> 00:07:18,140 You know I've been trying to work on my temper, Sebastian. 122 00:07:18,140 --> 00:07:20,270 Brock was the coolest. 123 00:07:26,210 --> 00:07:28,450 -Hey, there goes that sexy Brent Chirino. 124 00:07:28,450 --> 00:07:30,250 Too bad his twin brother died. 125 00:07:30,250 --> 00:07:32,150 I would've loved to have been the meat 126 00:07:32,150 --> 00:07:33,850 in that Chirino sandwich. 127 00:07:33,850 --> 00:07:35,820 -Yeah, at least Brock wore a helmet! 128 00:07:35,820 --> 00:07:38,220 I'm looking at you, Brent! 129 00:07:38,220 --> 00:07:40,020 If you're hiding any drugs in your butthole, missy, 130 00:07:40,030 --> 00:07:42,960 I swear to God... 131 00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:48,470 -Brent... 132 00:07:48,470 --> 00:07:50,500 -Look out! 133 00:07:50,500 --> 00:07:51,840 -Brent. 134 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,570 -There's still time! 135 00:07:55,510 --> 00:07:56,910 -Unh! 136 00:08:03,450 --> 00:08:05,550 You really threw me for a loop. 137 00:08:05,550 --> 00:08:08,190 I was on the edge of my seat. 138 00:08:08,190 --> 00:08:11,990 Say, aren't you that fella whose cool brother was murdered? 139 00:08:11,990 --> 00:08:13,120 -Whatever. 140 00:08:13,130 --> 00:08:14,860 I don't want to talk about it. 141 00:08:14,860 --> 00:08:16,390 -Well, name's Nedry -- 142 00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:17,630 Nedry Headcheese. 143 00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:18,900 -Chirino -- 144 00:08:18,900 --> 00:08:20,330 Brent Chirino. 145 00:08:20,330 --> 00:08:22,170 -I think you'll find I have a lot to offer 146 00:08:22,170 --> 00:08:23,600 as a best friend. 147 00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:26,340 -Whatever, man. I'm not here to make friends. 148 00:08:26,340 --> 00:08:28,940 I'm here to find out who murdered my brother 149 00:08:28,940 --> 00:08:31,280 and get revenge. 150 00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:33,480 -Say, isn't this the frat 151 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:35,550 your murdered brother belonged to? 152 00:08:40,490 --> 00:08:42,150 Maybe we could pledge together, 153 00:08:42,150 --> 00:08:45,060 find out what really happened to your brother. 154 00:08:45,060 --> 00:08:45,920 I always thought... 155 00:08:45,930 --> 00:08:46,920 -I promised myself 156 00:08:46,930 --> 00:08:49,290 I would never join a fraternity. 157 00:08:49,300 --> 00:08:51,400 I already had one brother. 158 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:56,030 I don't need any other brothers. 159 00:08:56,040 --> 00:08:58,040 -And that's why, even though a pack of wolves 160 00:08:58,040 --> 00:08:59,340 took the use of my legs, 161 00:08:59,340 --> 00:09:02,440 I decided to become a zoology major. 162 00:09:02,440 --> 00:09:05,080 My whole family was once murdered by wolves. 163 00:09:09,950 --> 00:09:11,980 -Well, well, well... 164 00:09:11,980 --> 00:09:14,450 If it isn't Brock Chirino, back from the dead. 165 00:09:14,450 --> 00:09:19,060 -Actually, I'm Brock's twin brother, Brent. 166 00:09:19,060 --> 00:09:21,530 -Weird. 167 00:09:21,530 --> 00:09:23,060 Hey, you looking to pledge? 168 00:09:23,060 --> 00:09:24,930 Great to have you aboard Delta Bi. 169 00:09:24,930 --> 00:09:26,360 -Oh, I -- -But I -- 170 00:09:26,370 --> 00:09:27,670 I understand, you know? 171 00:09:27,670 --> 00:09:28,700 If you need some more time to get over 172 00:09:28,700 --> 00:09:31,200 your brother's tragic death... 173 00:09:31,200 --> 00:09:32,600 -No. 174 00:09:32,610 --> 00:09:34,140 I'm done grieving. 175 00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:37,270 I'm ready to party until my pants fall off. 176 00:09:39,010 --> 00:09:40,410 -Welcome to Delta Bi Theta. 177 00:09:40,410 --> 00:09:42,380 I think you're gonna fit right in with the guys. 178 00:09:42,380 --> 00:09:44,620 I'm Derek. I'm the friendliest guy you'll meet here. 179 00:09:44,620 --> 00:09:45,950 -Shut the fuck up, Derek! 180 00:09:45,950 --> 00:09:48,220 -Nice comeback, bro. 181 00:09:48,220 --> 00:09:49,990 Don't mind the camera. That's Z.Q. 182 00:09:49,990 --> 00:09:52,620 You should see the workout tapes he makes of us bros. 183 00:09:52,630 --> 00:09:55,490 They're very...artistic. 184 00:09:55,490 --> 00:09:57,960 -Hi. -Hello. 185 00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:00,130 -Come on. Let's go inside. 186 00:10:11,380 --> 00:10:13,340 -Siskel and Ebert say "Pizza Goblins" 187 00:10:13,350 --> 00:10:14,610 is "family magic." 188 00:10:14,610 --> 00:10:16,350 "Two thumbs way down." 189 00:10:18,320 --> 00:10:19,580 -Dragons fr-- 190 00:10:22,650 --> 00:10:24,190 -Welcome to Delta Bi. 191 00:10:24,190 --> 00:10:27,390 You'll see that the party never stops here. 192 00:10:27,390 --> 00:10:30,290 That's Spike. He rages harder than any of us. 193 00:10:32,130 --> 00:10:33,530 Classic Spike. 194 00:10:33,530 --> 00:10:35,000 That there is Sizzler. 195 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:36,370 He's trying to pledge Delta Bi, 196 00:10:36,370 --> 00:10:38,740 but he won't get in 'cause he's a vegetarian. 197 00:10:38,740 --> 00:10:39,700 -What? 198 00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:46,280 -This here is Samzy. 199 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:48,180 He has a lot of memories of your brother. 200 00:10:54,650 --> 00:10:58,690 -I made them just like you like them, Samzy -- overhard. 201 00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:01,530 - Pretty nice. - Overhard. 202 00:11:01,530 --> 00:11:03,630 Like you, Samzy. 203 00:11:03,630 --> 00:11:05,130 -Sorry. 204 00:11:05,130 --> 00:11:07,300 Samzy's a bit of a bitch. 205 00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:10,400 -Oh. That explains it. 206 00:11:17,340 --> 00:11:18,510 -This is Todd. 207 00:11:18,510 --> 00:11:20,580 We call him T-O-Double-D for short. 208 00:11:20,580 --> 00:11:22,510 He's pre-med. Smartest guy in the frat. 209 00:11:22,520 --> 00:11:23,550 -Ohh! 210 00:11:23,550 --> 00:11:25,080 Jesus, Derek, not now! 211 00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:26,820 I got a lot on my mind. 212 00:11:26,820 --> 00:11:28,690 Look at all my work that I'm doing. 213 00:11:28,690 --> 00:11:31,190 With midterms and finals for everyone, what... 214 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:36,460 Brock? -Oh, this is actually Brent, 215 00:11:36,460 --> 00:11:38,730 Brock's twin brother. 216 00:11:38,730 --> 00:11:39,700 -Weird. 217 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,300 -Surprise! -No! 218 00:11:46,070 --> 00:11:48,240 -Ugh! Samantha, what the fuck?! 219 00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:52,210 -That's Todd's girlfriend, Samantha. 220 00:11:52,210 --> 00:11:55,280 She's a psych major, which means she's a total psycho. 221 00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:57,150 But, uh, you know, she owns a motor home, 222 00:11:57,150 --> 00:11:58,450 so it's cool. -Oh. 223 00:11:58,450 --> 00:12:00,480 -Babe, you can't keep coming in here, 224 00:12:00,490 --> 00:12:02,190 bringing delicious treats for me. 225 00:12:02,190 --> 00:12:04,320 -But you deserve a treat, Todd! 226 00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:05,720 Just a little bit of pampering 227 00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,530 before our big anniversary getaway weekend 228 00:12:08,530 --> 00:12:11,260 in old-town Sacramento. 229 00:12:11,660 --> 00:12:14,200 - I guess I do deserve a treat. 230 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:15,800 -Mm-hmm. 231 00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:17,400 -But they're over on the floor. 232 00:12:28,850 --> 00:12:31,120 -Sorry I tossed your cookies back there. 233 00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:32,450 -That's okay. I'm used to it. 234 00:12:32,450 --> 00:12:34,720 -What do you mean? 235 00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:36,790 -I've always wanted to be a Delta Bi. 236 00:12:36,790 --> 00:12:39,420 -Be one of these guys? Why? 237 00:12:39,430 --> 00:12:42,260 -Delta Bi is the coolest frat in Chico, 238 00:12:42,260 --> 00:12:43,790 but I'm a girl, 239 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:46,800 so I could never join, even though I'm a legacy. 240 00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:48,670 -Listen... 241 00:12:48,670 --> 00:12:52,140 I know what it's like to not belong. 242 00:12:52,140 --> 00:12:53,540 -Brent! 243 00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:55,440 -I'm coming, guys! 244 00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:56,710 I'm coming! 245 00:12:56,710 --> 00:12:58,210 All right, I came. 246 00:12:58,210 --> 00:13:00,680 -Some pretty sweet tai chi back there. 247 00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:02,410 Knew you'd fit in here. 248 00:13:02,410 --> 00:13:04,550 -But I never knew tai chi. 249 00:13:04,550 --> 00:13:08,490 My dead brother knew tai chi. 250 00:13:08,490 --> 00:13:09,550 -You okay? 251 00:13:09,560 --> 00:13:10,820 -Sure. 252 00:13:10,820 --> 00:13:13,260 Uh, where's Brock's old room? 253 00:13:18,300 --> 00:13:19,600 -Yeah. 254 00:13:34,610 --> 00:13:39,620 -And the winner for best dancer at prom, Brent Chirino! 255 00:13:41,590 --> 00:13:43,490 -Ugh! This is my room! 256 00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:46,890 I called dibs on this room like two minutes after Brock died! 257 00:13:46,890 --> 00:13:49,260 Shit! 258 00:13:49,260 --> 00:13:50,460 You got to get out of here! 259 00:13:50,460 --> 00:13:52,300 I got to haze a pledge right now. 260 00:13:52,300 --> 00:13:54,230 -This is Turbeaux. -I'm Turbeaux. 261 00:13:54,230 --> 00:13:56,530 Shit! Pinch me, pledge. 262 00:13:56,540 --> 00:13:58,670 Oh! Pinch me harder! 263 00:13:58,670 --> 00:14:00,670 Aah! Guess I'm not dreaming. 264 00:14:00,670 --> 00:14:01,910 Brock told me about you -- 265 00:14:01,910 --> 00:14:03,840 little Brenty Brent Brent Chirino. 266 00:14:03,840 --> 00:14:06,210 Hmm! He said you're a bit of a loner. 267 00:14:06,210 --> 00:14:09,210 -Actually, Turbeaux, Brent's thinking about pledging. 268 00:14:09,220 --> 00:14:10,880 -Oh, really?! 269 00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:12,880 You want to get into this frat? 270 00:14:12,890 --> 00:14:14,790 You want to learn our secrets? 271 00:14:14,790 --> 00:14:16,390 You got to get through me. 272 00:14:16,390 --> 00:14:18,460 Sizzler! 273 00:14:18,460 --> 00:14:21,330 Or maybe you don't have what it takes to be a Delta Bi. 274 00:14:21,330 --> 00:14:22,360 -Do or die! 275 00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:23,730 -You think you can handle... 276 00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:25,330 this?! -Aah! 277 00:14:25,330 --> 00:14:27,860 -You think you can handle this?! 278 00:14:27,870 --> 00:14:28,730 -Ohh! 279 00:14:28,730 --> 00:14:30,330 -You think... 280 00:14:30,340 --> 00:14:32,840 you can handle this? 281 00:14:32,840 --> 00:14:33,700 -Aah! 282 00:14:33,710 --> 00:14:34,840 -This? -Aah! 283 00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:36,010 -This? 284 00:14:36,010 --> 00:14:37,810 -Ohh! -This? 285 00:14:37,810 --> 00:14:39,240 -Aah! Aah! Aah! Aahn=! 286 00:14:39,250 --> 00:14:41,980 -You think you can handle this?! 287 00:14:41,980 --> 00:14:43,680 Do you...think... 288 00:14:43,680 --> 00:14:47,580 you...can... handle...this?! 289 00:14:47,590 --> 00:14:49,020 Watch me not give a shit! 290 00:14:49,020 --> 00:14:50,720 Sizzler! -Ohh! 291 00:14:50,720 --> 00:14:52,560 -I don't care about you! 292 00:14:52,560 --> 00:14:54,420 I don't care where you came from! 293 00:14:54,430 --> 00:14:56,530 Your ancestors mean nothing! 294 00:14:56,530 --> 00:15:00,260 You bring shame to all of us! 295 00:15:00,270 --> 00:15:01,530 -Yes, sir. 296 00:15:01,530 --> 00:15:03,700 -Actually, Brent was thinking about 297 00:15:03,700 --> 00:15:05,700 helping us out with our senior prank. 298 00:15:07,940 --> 00:15:10,270 -Oh, really? 299 00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:13,810 Well, our pranks are pretty goddamn wild. 300 00:15:13,810 --> 00:15:15,850 This year's gonna be no different. 301 00:15:15,850 --> 00:15:17,680 Gonna be bonkers! 302 00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:20,450 We're gonna need a real party boy to pull off this prank. 303 00:15:20,450 --> 00:15:22,820 Is that you? 304 00:15:22,820 --> 00:15:24,290 You daddy's party boy? 305 00:15:24,290 --> 00:15:25,790 -Yes. 306 00:15:25,790 --> 00:15:28,430 -Look at you. You'll never be a Delta Bi. 307 00:15:28,430 --> 00:15:30,830 I'm gonna whup your ass with my big paddle now. 308 00:15:30,830 --> 00:15:32,060 It's in my closet. 309 00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:37,530 Aaaaaah! 310 00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:40,570 - Oh, man! 311 00:15:40,570 --> 00:15:41,940 -God! -I think I captured 312 00:15:41,940 --> 00:15:43,040 some genuine fear there. 313 00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:44,470 -God, guys! 314 00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:46,580 You know how I feel about baby dogs! 315 00:15:46,580 --> 00:15:48,050 -Oh! We got you so good! 316 00:15:48,050 --> 00:15:51,750 -Get the fuck out of here, Samantha! 317 00:15:51,750 --> 00:15:52,620 -Why?! 318 00:15:52,620 --> 00:15:54,720 God, guys! Guys! 319 00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:57,320 -I got this for Brock for his 16th birthday. 320 00:15:57,320 --> 00:16:00,860 It looks just like our childhood dog, Dr. Bagels. 321 00:16:00,860 --> 00:16:02,960 -To me -- to Turbeaux! -Ha! 322 00:16:02,960 --> 00:16:04,360 -To your bro! 323 00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:06,660 -But I need Turbeaux to trust me. 324 00:16:06,670 --> 00:16:09,370 -I hate puppies, too! 325 00:16:09,370 --> 00:16:11,540 Unh! 326 00:16:11,540 --> 00:16:13,940 -Really? 327 00:16:13,940 --> 00:16:17,340 Maybe you are okay, Not Brock. 328 00:16:17,340 --> 00:16:19,680 Maybe you are okay. 329 00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:23,750 Hey, Sizzler, get the window. Z.Q., shut that camera off. 330 00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:25,020 Brent, think about spending the night 331 00:16:25,020 --> 00:16:26,450 in my room once I'm all moved in. 332 00:16:26,450 --> 00:16:27,780 Let's check out these prank plans. 333 00:16:29,660 --> 00:16:33,060 -Oh. First, we're gonna need these. 334 00:16:33,060 --> 00:16:35,360 -That's tape. 335 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:37,690 -Whoo! 336 00:16:37,700 --> 00:16:40,060 Goddamn! 337 00:16:40,070 --> 00:16:42,870 -They gave us so much of that beer stuff. 338 00:16:42,870 --> 00:16:44,600 I have the spins. 339 00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:46,040 I can't even read this sign. 340 00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:47,470 -Calm down, Nedry! 341 00:16:47,470 --> 00:16:49,110 According to these plank prints, 342 00:16:49,110 --> 00:16:52,880 it says the college radio station is right up there. 343 00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:55,780 So, remember, when we get on the air, 344 00:16:55,780 --> 00:16:57,080 you're gonna say, 345 00:16:57,080 --> 00:17:01,150 "Dean Pepperstone eats farts," okay? 346 00:17:01,150 --> 00:17:02,920 And be sure not to mess it up, 347 00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:05,060 'cause I have to get into this frat 348 00:17:05,060 --> 00:17:09,490 to find out who was the murderer to my brother. 349 00:17:09,500 --> 00:17:11,560 -Whatever you say, best friend! 350 00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:13,960 - They murdered my brother! 351 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:17,130 -Chico Tower, this is Pan Am flight 912, 352 00:17:17,140 --> 00:17:18,970 requesting permission to land. 353 00:17:18,970 --> 00:17:22,940 -Okay! Dean Pepperstone eats farts! 354 00:17:22,940 --> 00:17:24,540 -Dean Pepperst-- 355 00:17:24,540 --> 00:17:26,040 Listen, this is air-traffic control tower. 356 00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:27,410 Get off this frequency! 357 00:17:27,410 --> 00:17:29,010 -You get off this frequency. 358 00:17:29,010 --> 00:17:30,680 -I am a pilot. I have a plane to land! 359 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,980 I'm gonna crash! -Dean Pepperstone eats farts! 360 00:17:32,990 --> 00:17:35,450 -Oh, God, I'm so sorry! 361 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:46,030 -You Delta Bi Thetas have done it for the last time! 362 00:17:46,030 --> 00:17:48,500 You killed 250 people, 363 00:17:48,500 --> 00:17:50,700 and I do not eat farts. 364 00:17:50,700 --> 00:17:52,500 -Listen, you need to give us a second chance. 365 00:17:52,500 --> 00:17:54,100 -I've given you enough chances! 366 00:17:54,110 --> 00:17:56,810 Need I remind you of last year's prank, 367 00:17:56,810 --> 00:17:58,510 when you broke the county dam 368 00:17:58,510 --> 00:18:02,580 and submerged Ol' Parchtown in water? 369 00:18:02,580 --> 00:18:04,510 -But we created New Lake City. 370 00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:06,150 -You drowned 4,000 people. 371 00:18:06,150 --> 00:18:08,590 -The paddle-boat business is booming there. 372 00:18:08,590 --> 00:18:12,090 -Don't make me remind you of sophomore-year prank. 373 00:18:13,990 --> 00:18:16,660 -Sophomores, get to the chopper! 374 00:18:16,660 --> 00:18:18,860 We are leaving! 375 00:18:18,860 --> 00:18:20,760 Sophomores, get to the chopper! 376 00:18:20,770 --> 00:18:22,070 -That's not fair! 377 00:18:22,070 --> 00:18:23,900 Freshman-year prank, let me remind you, 378 00:18:23,900 --> 00:18:25,600 we helped... 379 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:27,870 depose a Central American dictator. 380 00:18:27,870 --> 00:18:31,110 - That's true. Your heavy-metal hot-air balloon 381 00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:34,610 did drive General Cortez from the Brazilian embassy, 382 00:18:34,610 --> 00:18:37,480 which is why I'm only suspending you. 383 00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:38,750 -During Greek Week?! 384 00:18:38,750 --> 00:18:40,580 What's wrong with you?! 385 00:18:40,590 --> 00:18:42,250 -Come on! It's like Easter for men! 386 00:18:42,250 --> 00:18:44,220 -You can have your own Greek Week 387 00:18:44,220 --> 00:18:46,790 out at the old sorority house... 388 00:18:46,790 --> 00:18:49,190 by the lake. -What? Ugh! 389 00:18:49,190 --> 00:18:51,090 -They never pick up their dog shit! 390 00:18:51,100 --> 00:18:53,130 -It's haunted! -No! 391 00:18:54,900 --> 00:18:57,670 -Go there, brother. 392 00:18:59,800 --> 00:19:01,940 -Guys, a weekend at the lake? 393 00:19:01,940 --> 00:19:03,840 That's nothing, right? 394 00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:08,510 It'll be like a -- like a Dude Bro party! 395 00:19:08,510 --> 00:19:10,150 -Yeah. Okay. 396 00:19:10,150 --> 00:19:11,550 -Yeah. 397 00:19:11,550 --> 00:19:13,120 A Dude Bro party. 398 00:19:13,120 --> 00:19:15,020 And maybe you could invite some, 399 00:19:15,020 --> 00:19:19,060 uh, young, nubile, recently divorced women? 400 00:19:19,060 --> 00:19:20,890 -No! -No! 401 00:19:20,890 --> 00:19:21,890 -Bullshit! 402 00:19:21,890 --> 00:19:23,190 -Come on! No girls allowed! 403 00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:24,660 -Fine! Fine! Get out! 404 00:19:24,660 --> 00:19:26,830 Get out, all of you! 405 00:19:26,830 --> 00:19:28,200 -Somebody help me! 406 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,100 -Should I lock this? 407 00:19:37,110 --> 00:19:38,010 -It's done. 408 00:19:38,010 --> 00:19:39,680 -Excellent. 409 00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:45,080 Soon, the Dude Bros will taste their own blood. 410 00:19:45,080 --> 00:19:51,720 All that's required now is a virgin sacrifice. 411 00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:53,920 Virgo sacrificium. 412 00:19:53,930 --> 00:19:55,690 -Yes, yes. Virgo Sacramento. 413 00:19:55,690 --> 00:19:59,800 Whatever. -Virgo sacrificium. 414 00:20:00,570 --> 00:20:02,770 Virgo sacrificium. 415 00:20:02,770 --> 00:20:03,900 -No! 416 00:20:03,900 --> 00:20:04,670 No! 417 00:20:04,670 --> 00:20:06,670 Aah! Ohh! 418 00:20:06,670 --> 00:20:07,600 Aah! 419 00:20:07,610 --> 00:20:09,040 Aah! 420 00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:13,110 -Virgo sacrificium! 421 00:20:13,110 --> 00:20:16,950 -I'm an immortal fuck machine! 422 00:20:19,120 --> 00:20:20,720 -Buttiker, get in here! 423 00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:24,090 -Uh-oh! Someone's in trouble! 424 00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:29,860 -Yes, Chief. -Ah. Candace Buttiker. 425 00:20:29,860 --> 00:20:31,930 First in your class at Naval Academy, 426 00:20:31,930 --> 00:20:33,260 in Valencia, Florida. 427 00:20:33,270 --> 00:20:35,200 Are you ready for a real-world 428 00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:36,870 Chico police mission? 429 00:20:36,870 --> 00:20:38,070 -Oh, daddy like! 430 00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:39,640 -What have you got for me, Chief? 431 00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:41,640 -Motherface is rising on the harvest moon 432 00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:43,770 to kill the Delta Bis, 433 00:20:43,780 --> 00:20:47,210 but her plan won't work without a virgin sacrifice. 434 00:20:47,210 --> 00:20:50,110 That's where that idiot virgin Sminkle comes in 435 00:20:50,120 --> 00:20:52,180 -Aah! Fuck! My face! 436 00:20:52,180 --> 00:20:55,320 -You want me to send Officer Sminkle to his death. 437 00:20:55,320 --> 00:21:00,820 -You see, only his death will give Motherface the power 438 00:21:00,830 --> 00:21:04,890 to defeat the Delta Bis when it matters the most. 439 00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:08,000 -And, um, what would you like me to tell him? 440 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:10,870 - Watch this. 441 00:21:13,670 --> 00:21:15,810 Sminkle, get in here! 442 00:21:15,810 --> 00:21:18,040 -Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy! 443 00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:19,210 Aw, come on, Chief! 444 00:21:19,210 --> 00:21:20,710 I thought we talked about this. 445 00:21:20,710 --> 00:21:24,310 No girls allowed in the Dude Room. 446 00:21:27,790 --> 00:21:28,850 I'm fine. Ah-choo! 447 00:21:28,850 --> 00:21:30,750 -Aah! What the hell?! 448 00:21:30,760 --> 00:21:32,260 -Sminkle, um, 449 00:21:32,260 --> 00:21:34,790 I have kind of an important assignment for you, if -- 450 00:21:34,790 --> 00:21:36,190 if you think you're up for it. 451 00:21:36,190 --> 00:21:38,800 -Oh, my gosh. Oh, absolutely. 452 00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,400 Wait a second, though. Don't -- don't you hate me? 453 00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:43,770 'Cause you called me a cum bubble yesterday. 454 00:21:43,770 --> 00:21:45,740 -Well, the way you got that girl to confess 455 00:21:45,740 --> 00:21:48,440 that she was hiding those drugs in her butthole, 456 00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:50,010 that was pretty impressive. 457 00:21:50,010 --> 00:21:52,340 And I'd like to kind of give you a reward. 458 00:21:52,340 --> 00:21:55,810 You know about Chico's orange-shortage problem, right? 459 00:21:55,810 --> 00:21:58,010 -Oh, yes. It's very terrible, Chief. 460 00:21:58,020 --> 00:22:00,920 City-wide vitamin-C levels have never been lower. 461 00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:03,990 -Well, uh, turns out your old friends 462 00:22:03,990 --> 00:22:09,090 the Dude Bros are, in reality... 463 00:22:09,090 --> 00:22:11,730 bags of oranges. 464 00:22:15,370 --> 00:22:17,230 -I should've known. 465 00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:21,240 -So, what I need you to do is find them, 466 00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:22,910 bop them on the nose, 467 00:22:22,910 --> 00:22:25,410 and turn them back into their actual forms, 468 00:22:25,410 --> 00:22:27,040 which as I said earlier, 469 00:22:27,050 --> 00:22:30,750 are bags of oranges. 470 00:22:30,750 --> 00:22:32,350 Save our city, Sminkle. 471 00:22:32,350 --> 00:22:35,020 Officer Buttiker will accompany you 472 00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:40,260 to bop the Dude Bros on the nose 473 00:22:40,260 --> 00:22:48,900 and turn them back into bags of fucking oranges. 474 00:22:48,900 --> 00:22:51,800 -Got it! You won't regret this, Chief-a-rooney! 475 00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:54,970 -See? Now Officer Sminkle's Spazwagon 476 00:22:54,970 --> 00:22:56,770 is all gassed up. 477 00:22:56,780 --> 00:22:59,880 The Dude Bros are at the old sorority house by the lake. 478 00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:02,210 And get there before the harvest moon. 479 00:23:02,210 --> 00:23:04,110 The town is depending on you. 480 00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:14,960 -Come on, guys! 481 00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:19,100 Let's get some tunes in here! 482 00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:22,370 -What the shit is this?! 483 00:23:22,370 --> 00:23:23,500 -Yeah, Todd. 484 00:23:23,500 --> 00:23:26,440 What is all this about? 485 00:23:26,440 --> 00:23:30,010 -Flowers, the music, champagne, 486 00:23:30,010 --> 00:23:32,080 that banner I refuse to read... 487 00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:35,180 -Guys, Samantha loves you, 488 00:23:35,180 --> 00:23:39,020 and she wants us to have a good time by the lake. 489 00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:49,330 -Aah! 490 00:23:49,330 --> 00:23:51,560 -Hey, Todd, Samantha take your virginity yet? 491 00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:53,060 -Not yet. 492 00:23:53,060 --> 00:23:55,570 She's been really pushing me, though. 493 00:23:55,570 --> 00:23:57,470 And I'm not ready to be a dad. 494 00:23:57,470 --> 00:23:59,970 -Guys, there's baby stuff in here! Gah! 495 00:23:59,970 --> 00:24:01,940 -Hey! No! No baby stuff! 496 00:24:01,940 --> 00:24:03,470 -Baby hats... -Put that stuff back! 497 00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:06,380 No babies! -No, Todd, we're Americans! 498 00:24:06,380 --> 00:24:10,110 We can do whatever we want with no consequences! 499 00:24:10,120 --> 00:24:12,350 -No consequences in America! 500 00:24:12,350 --> 00:24:14,420 -A toast to Brent. 501 00:24:14,420 --> 00:24:16,220 -Boo! 502 00:24:16,220 --> 00:24:19,320 -Hey, now, pour that pledge a pint of Prosecco, partner. 503 00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:22,360 Chirino perfectly pulled off our senior prank. 504 00:24:22,360 --> 00:24:25,200 We wanted the whole world to know that Dean Pepperstone 505 00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:26,430 eats farts. -Thank you. 506 00:24:26,430 --> 00:24:28,300 -And I think they got the message. 507 00:24:28,300 --> 00:24:30,330 -Speech! Speech! Right now! 508 00:24:30,340 --> 00:24:32,170 -Um... 509 00:24:32,170 --> 00:24:34,540 I guess I just want to say, uh, 510 00:24:34,540 --> 00:24:41,850 I can see why my brother was so stoked on you guys. 511 00:24:41,850 --> 00:24:43,950 Um... 512 00:24:43,950 --> 00:24:46,620 and, uh... 513 00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:51,390 Titties. 514 00:24:51,390 --> 00:24:52,590 -Yeah! 515 00:24:52,590 --> 00:24:53,860 Yeah! -All right. 516 00:24:53,860 --> 00:24:54,620 -Yeah! -Whoo! 517 00:24:54,630 --> 00:24:56,560 -Yeah! 518 00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:59,160 -Yes! Oh, my favorite! 519 00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:03,070 -Yeah! -Forever's gonna start tonight! 520 00:25:03,070 --> 00:25:05,900 -Delta Bi! Do or die! -It speaks! 521 00:25:05,900 --> 00:25:08,340 -Delta Bi! Do or die! 522 00:25:08,340 --> 00:25:14,980 Delta Bi! Do or die! 523 00:25:14,980 --> 00:25:19,420 -Delta Bi! Do or die! Delta Bi! Do or die! 524 00:25:19,420 --> 00:25:22,620 -How are we gonna get across this lake? 525 00:25:31,960 --> 00:25:34,560 -Well, that's enough footage of that. 526 00:25:34,570 --> 00:25:37,170 Someone want to get his attention? 527 00:25:37,170 --> 00:25:38,170 -Come on, pledge. 528 00:25:38,170 --> 00:25:39,300 I'm over this tear shit. 529 00:25:39,300 --> 00:25:40,440 Go get us some paddy boats. 530 00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:41,540 Come on! 531 00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:48,040 -Uh...Uh, hello? 532 00:25:48,050 --> 00:25:49,310 -Go away! 533 00:25:49,310 --> 00:25:51,450 Can't you see I'm mourning the dea-- 534 00:26:05,230 --> 00:26:07,660 Oh. 535 00:26:07,670 --> 00:26:11,670 Hey! The Delta Bis! 536 00:26:11,670 --> 00:26:13,940 I was just celebrating the anniversary 537 00:26:13,940 --> 00:26:17,370 of my business finally taking off, huh? 538 00:26:17,380 --> 00:26:20,480 I have you boys to thank for that. 539 00:26:22,610 --> 00:26:25,580 Stand over there, next to my dead family! 540 00:26:25,580 --> 00:26:27,320 Come on. Yep. 541 00:26:27,320 --> 00:26:30,420 Nobody wanted to rent a paddy boat in Ol' Parchtown. 542 00:26:30,420 --> 00:26:32,660 I was swimming in debt. 543 00:26:32,660 --> 00:26:34,590 Until you boys flooded the town 544 00:26:34,590 --> 00:26:36,730 and drowned my whole family, that is. 545 00:26:36,730 --> 00:26:39,700 Now business is booming! 546 00:26:39,700 --> 00:26:42,630 Go ahead -- put your arm around my wife. 547 00:26:42,630 --> 00:26:45,400 My beautiful wife! 548 00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,640 She died doing what she loved. 549 00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:50,970 -Drowning? -Yeah. 550 00:26:50,980 --> 00:26:52,510 Not much reason for swimming lessons 551 00:26:52,510 --> 00:26:54,280 if you lived in Ol' Parchtown, 552 00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:58,380 which is what made it such a particularly funny prank. 553 00:27:02,090 --> 00:27:05,420 -Now let's do a goofy one! 554 00:27:05,420 --> 00:27:08,090 I said make it goofy! 555 00:27:20,070 --> 00:27:21,770 That's a great picture. 556 00:27:21,770 --> 00:27:25,170 Oh, man, that's my baby boy, too. 557 00:27:25,180 --> 00:27:29,350 16 months old when the water took him away. 558 00:27:29,350 --> 00:27:31,680 You guys still got it! 559 00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:34,020 Pranksters till the end! 560 00:27:34,020 --> 00:27:36,390 The bitter...end. 561 00:27:37,690 --> 00:27:39,590 You boys want to rent a paddy boat? 562 00:27:42,790 --> 00:27:45,190 What paddy boat are you gonna choose, Brock? 563 00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:48,160 -I'm Brent. -Okay. All right. 564 00:27:48,170 --> 00:27:50,570 -I trust that you have a paddy boat that will accommodate 565 00:27:50,570 --> 00:27:51,630 my lifestyle. -No. 566 00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:52,770 -Oh. 567 00:27:52,770 --> 00:27:55,440 -If I remember correctly, and I do, 568 00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:57,670 there's a handicap paddle boat about 20 miles that way. 569 00:27:57,680 --> 00:28:00,380 -Yeah! Fuck off, Nerdry! 570 00:28:00,380 --> 00:28:01,780 -Don't tell me to F off! 571 00:28:01,780 --> 00:28:03,580 I'll F you if you don't come back for me! 572 00:28:03,580 --> 00:28:06,320 -Whoa, whoa! Nerdry, come on. 573 00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:07,380 You're in college now. 574 00:28:07,390 --> 00:28:08,790 You can say "fuck." 575 00:28:08,790 --> 00:28:10,750 Give it a try. 576 00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:14,120 -F-f-f-f-f-f... 577 00:28:14,130 --> 00:28:16,060 F-f-f-f-f-f-fu-- 578 00:28:17,460 --> 00:28:19,130 You won't leave me here, will you? 579 00:28:19,130 --> 00:28:21,560 -I got to go with them. You understand. 580 00:28:21,570 --> 00:28:23,170 Here. 581 00:28:23,170 --> 00:28:25,470 In case your wheelchair breaks down. 582 00:28:25,470 --> 00:28:26,600 -Uh, thanks. 583 00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:28,340 Radical deck. 584 00:28:28,340 --> 00:28:31,170 Well, see you there, Brent. 585 00:28:31,180 --> 00:28:33,240 Don't forget to avenge your murdered brother! 586 00:28:33,240 --> 00:28:35,650 -Okay! One more picture! 587 00:28:35,650 --> 00:28:36,850 And surprise me! 588 00:28:36,850 --> 00:28:38,380 Like when you blew up the dam 589 00:28:38,380 --> 00:28:41,250 and took everyone I knew and loved! 590 00:28:48,760 --> 00:28:51,430 -Well, they don't call me Ol' Iron Arms Headcheese 591 00:28:51,430 --> 00:28:52,460 for nothing. 592 00:28:52,460 --> 00:28:54,100 Just 20 more miles, 593 00:28:54,100 --> 00:28:55,770 and I'll have an ice-cold brew waiting for me. 594 00:28:55,770 --> 00:28:59,140 Ha! 595 00:28:59,140 --> 00:29:01,640 Oh, monkey butts. 596 00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:04,710 Is it so pooping hard to load a legacy 597 00:29:04,710 --> 00:29:07,640 into a -- a whore paddle boat?! 598 00:29:07,650 --> 00:29:08,710 That's it. 599 00:29:08,710 --> 00:29:10,610 I'm gonna say it. 600 00:29:10,620 --> 00:29:12,750 F-f-f-fuck this creek! 601 00:29:14,150 --> 00:29:16,450 Those dick farts never gave two shitting bitches 602 00:29:16,450 --> 00:29:17,820 about Ol' Iron Arms. 603 00:29:17,820 --> 00:29:19,520 They'll see. 604 00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:22,390 I'll show those vagina faces what's what. 605 00:29:22,390 --> 00:29:26,630 Those Delta Bi titty jizzers will regret the day they were -- 606 00:29:26,630 --> 00:29:28,230 Guys? 607 00:29:30,730 --> 00:29:32,570 Help. 608 00:30:03,330 --> 00:30:05,400 -My psychic told me my son's head would cave in 609 00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:06,500 from a car accident, 610 00:30:06,500 --> 00:30:08,370 and hello, prom night. 611 00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:14,940 -And the number-one reason 612 00:30:14,950 --> 00:30:18,950 men and women just can't get along... 613 00:30:18,950 --> 00:30:21,180 The remote control! 614 00:30:21,190 --> 00:30:22,450 What do you think, Candace? 615 00:30:22,450 --> 00:30:24,190 Think Letterman will go for these lists? 616 00:30:24,190 --> 00:30:25,860 -I'm not here to humor you, Sminkle. 617 00:30:25,860 --> 00:30:29,330 -Top 10 reasons Letterman will go for these Top 10 lists. 618 00:30:29,330 --> 00:30:32,630 Number 10, my boundless enthusiasm. 619 00:30:32,630 --> 00:30:34,530 -32 more hours, Candace. 620 00:30:34,530 --> 00:30:37,400 -Number 9, that man is slapping a little boy. 621 00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:38,670 -What? -That man is 622 00:30:38,670 --> 00:30:40,400 slapping a little boy! -Oh, my God! 623 00:30:40,410 --> 00:30:41,800 -You think you're cooler than me 624 00:30:41,810 --> 00:30:45,240 just 'cause you got a fancy tie and a job?! 625 00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:47,910 -Yaaah! 626 00:30:47,910 --> 00:30:49,910 Here's $100 and "The Grapes of Wrath," kid! 627 00:30:49,910 --> 00:30:51,610 Get out of town! Change your name! 628 00:30:51,620 --> 00:30:53,220 Start a new life for yourself! 629 00:30:53,220 --> 00:30:55,420 Keep going! Keep going! You can do it! 630 00:30:55,420 --> 00:30:58,220 And once you get into the trees for the night, 631 00:30:58,220 --> 00:31:00,590 I want you to read that fucking book! 632 00:31:02,260 --> 00:31:04,990 -That was, uh, pretty impressive how you handled that. 633 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:08,000 -Yeah, well, every child deserves a chance. 634 00:31:09,400 --> 00:31:11,400 -Aaaaaaah! 635 00:31:11,400 --> 00:31:12,870 -I love children. 636 00:31:12,870 --> 00:31:14,840 They're the future that we screwed up for ourselves, 637 00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:17,770 you know? So innocent. 638 00:31:17,780 --> 00:31:20,710 I guess you probably don't care about this crazy dream 639 00:31:20,710 --> 00:31:22,580 that I have, but, uh... 640 00:31:24,350 --> 00:31:27,650 I want to open up a mobile library for children. 641 00:31:27,650 --> 00:31:29,650 -Really? -You see, the first time 642 00:31:29,650 --> 00:31:32,460 I read a book, my mind went bang! 643 00:31:32,460 --> 00:31:34,920 Like, anything in the universe was possible, 644 00:31:34,930 --> 00:31:37,530 and I could find it all in the pages of a book. 645 00:31:37,530 --> 00:31:39,800 And, well, that's what I want to do 646 00:31:39,800 --> 00:31:41,930 for all the children of Chico. 647 00:31:41,930 --> 00:31:44,370 I just want to bang them all. 648 00:31:47,270 --> 00:31:48,540 -Um... -I'm gonna call it 649 00:31:48,540 --> 00:31:50,670 Sminkle's Bang Bus, Candace. 650 00:31:50,680 --> 00:31:54,280 No more waiting in the public library to bang every kid I see. 651 00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:56,750 No, sir, I'm going to travel from block to block, 652 00:31:56,750 --> 00:31:58,610 screaming out my window for kids 653 00:31:58,620 --> 00:32:02,020 to climb aboard my bus and get banged silly. 654 00:32:02,020 --> 00:32:04,050 -I mean, your heart's in the right place, 655 00:32:04,060 --> 00:32:07,620 but, um, how about "bookmobile"? 656 00:32:07,630 --> 00:32:09,490 -Yeah? -Not gonna lie, Candace -- 657 00:32:09,490 --> 00:32:12,430 that sounds real boring. 658 00:32:12,430 --> 00:32:15,530 I would not want to get banged in a bookmobile. 659 00:32:17,370 --> 00:32:18,530 My bang bus. -Oh, no! 660 00:32:18,540 --> 00:32:20,340 Oh, no, no, no! -My bang bus! 661 00:32:20,340 --> 00:32:21,500 My dream! 662 00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:25,980 -Sminkle! 663 00:32:25,980 --> 00:32:27,540 -Aw, man! 664 00:32:27,550 --> 00:32:30,750 Why does it have to not be a person anymore? 665 00:32:30,750 --> 00:32:31,750 -Ugh. 666 00:32:42,860 --> 00:32:44,090 -There it is. 667 00:32:44,100 --> 00:32:46,400 The old sorority house by the lake. 668 00:33:03,410 --> 00:33:06,450 -Damn it! This place is a fucking shit-hole! 669 00:33:06,450 --> 00:33:07,880 Who did this?! 670 00:33:07,890 --> 00:33:09,650 -Aah! 671 00:33:11,720 --> 00:33:16,060 -Someone -- someone else somewhere is in here. 672 00:33:27,370 --> 00:33:31,570 -Relax, bros! It's me! -Rip Stick! 673 00:33:31,580 --> 00:33:34,040 -Thought you'd rock out on the lake without me, yeah? 674 00:33:34,050 --> 00:33:36,510 -We thought you died in the embassy. 675 00:33:40,820 --> 00:33:44,920 -Part of me did die that day. 676 00:33:44,920 --> 00:33:46,390 But now I'm back! 677 00:33:46,390 --> 00:33:48,060 Rippin' and stickin'! 678 00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:55,870 And I see I'm not the only one back from the dead, Brock. 679 00:33:55,870 --> 00:33:57,400 -Brock did die. 680 00:33:57,400 --> 00:34:00,670 That's his twin brother, Brent. 681 00:34:00,670 --> 00:34:02,040 -Weird. 682 00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:04,140 Well, let's clean this stupid shit-hole 683 00:34:04,140 --> 00:34:05,670 up so we can party, eh?! 684 00:34:05,680 --> 00:34:06,910 -Yeah! 685 00:34:06,910 --> 00:34:08,840 -All right! 686 00:35:18,980 --> 00:35:21,480 - Hey! 687 00:35:30,690 --> 00:35:32,560 -This is more like it, huh, guys? 688 00:35:33,900 --> 00:35:36,070 -Okay. Now start partying. 689 00:35:40,710 --> 00:35:42,070 -Yeah! 690 00:35:50,110 --> 00:35:52,780 -Oh! No, no! It's happening again! 691 00:35:52,780 --> 00:35:53,980 Again! It's happening again! 692 00:35:53,990 --> 00:35:55,680 -What is your problem, Samzy?! 693 00:35:55,690 --> 00:35:57,520 -Yeah, chill out, Samzy! 694 00:35:57,520 --> 00:35:58,920 -Self-righteous fuck! 695 00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:01,020 -Samzy, you need to chill out, all right? 696 00:36:01,030 --> 00:36:04,190 This is just an old house with old fuses, bro. 697 00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:05,260 -Old fuses. 698 00:36:05,260 --> 00:36:07,060 -That's what I said -- fuses. 699 00:36:07,060 --> 00:36:08,600 -Old fuses, huh? 700 00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:11,170 -They are fuses, motherfucker! -It's old! 701 00:36:11,170 --> 00:36:13,040 -The fuse box is in the shed, 702 00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:14,700 if I remember correctly. 703 00:36:14,710 --> 00:36:16,910 -Derek, you know how to be a handyman from your dad. 704 00:36:16,910 --> 00:36:18,540 Go out there. -I told you, 705 00:36:18,540 --> 00:36:20,110 I hate handyman work. 706 00:36:20,110 --> 00:36:22,980 -You never told me that, bro. You never told me that. 707 00:36:22,980 --> 00:36:25,610 I would have not said that if you had told me that earlier. 708 00:36:37,790 --> 00:36:39,130 I'm so sorry. 709 00:36:39,930 --> 00:36:41,800 -Here goes nothing. 710 00:36:50,740 --> 00:36:53,010 All right, Derek, you can do this. 711 00:36:53,010 --> 00:36:55,210 You've been working with a therapist on this. 712 00:36:55,210 --> 00:36:56,910 You can do it. 713 00:36:56,910 --> 00:36:59,250 They're just tools. 714 00:36:59,250 --> 00:37:01,720 They're all just a bunch of tools. 715 00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:07,190 Oh, no! 716 00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:24,910 All just a bunch of tools. 717 00:37:39,160 --> 00:37:41,260 Aha. Gotcha. 718 00:37:43,030 --> 00:37:45,030 Aaaah! 719 00:37:45,030 --> 00:37:47,160 -Hoes before bros! 720 00:37:49,870 --> 00:37:51,300 - Derek did it! 721 00:37:51,300 --> 00:37:52,970 The electricity! 722 00:38:02,910 --> 00:38:04,380 -Come dance with us. 723 00:38:04,380 --> 00:38:07,120 -Brent, go dance with them. Go. 724 00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:08,980 Go, go, go. 725 00:38:08,990 --> 00:38:12,920 -D-a-ance? 726 00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:14,320 With someone? 727 00:38:15,230 --> 00:38:17,360 I did that once. 728 00:38:24,100 --> 00:38:26,340 -There you are, Brent. 729 00:38:26,340 --> 00:38:27,800 What are you doing? 730 00:38:27,810 --> 00:38:30,810 Prom limo's waiting outside. -Whoo! 731 00:38:30,810 --> 00:38:32,210 -I'm scared, Brock. 732 00:38:32,210 --> 00:38:34,140 I've never been with a girl before... 733 00:38:34,150 --> 00:38:36,780 dancing-wise. 734 00:38:36,780 --> 00:38:38,250 You... 735 00:38:38,250 --> 00:38:40,080 You weren't supposed to see this. 736 00:38:40,080 --> 00:38:42,820 -Dancing is easy, Brent -- 737 00:38:42,820 --> 00:38:44,350 if you have a plan, that is. 738 00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:46,090 Here. 739 00:38:46,090 --> 00:38:47,920 Let me show you. 740 00:38:51,060 --> 00:38:54,100 Follow the natural rhythm of the music. 741 00:38:54,100 --> 00:38:56,830 Ease into her smooth curves. 742 00:38:56,830 --> 00:38:59,000 The body wants what it wants. 743 00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:00,240 -I think I'm getting it! 744 00:39:00,240 --> 00:39:02,910 -Dancing is like tai-chi fighting. 745 00:39:02,910 --> 00:39:06,340 It's all about the transference of energy. 746 00:39:06,340 --> 00:39:08,910 Just use her inertia against her. 747 00:39:08,910 --> 00:39:09,980 That's it now. 748 00:39:09,980 --> 00:39:12,310 Whoooa! 749 00:39:12,320 --> 00:39:15,120 -Oh. 750 00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:16,990 -Oh, and first thing tomorrow, 751 00:39:16,990 --> 00:39:19,890 we're gonna return that mannequin to T.J. Maxx, buddy. 752 00:39:19,890 --> 00:39:21,060 -All right. 753 00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:24,360 Oh, Brock, what am I gonna do 754 00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:26,230 when you go off to East Chico U.? 755 00:39:26,230 --> 00:39:28,460 -Hey, you'll make some friends of your own. 756 00:39:28,470 --> 00:39:30,730 -But everybody sucks but us. 757 00:39:30,740 --> 00:39:32,330 -Remember what I always say -- 758 00:39:32,340 --> 00:39:33,770 when you face a foe 759 00:39:33,770 --> 00:39:35,440 you're afraid you can't defeat -- 760 00:39:35,440 --> 00:39:36,870 Murder! 761 00:39:36,870 --> 00:39:41,080 Aahhhhhhhhhhh! 762 00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:43,480 -Aah! Aah! Aah! 763 00:39:43,480 --> 00:39:47,250 Aah! 764 00:39:47,250 --> 00:39:49,420 It's horrible! 765 00:39:49,420 --> 00:39:50,890 Someone killed! 766 00:39:50,890 --> 00:39:52,050 -What's going on, Spike? 767 00:39:52,060 --> 00:39:53,160 -Spike, tell us what happened! 768 00:39:53,160 --> 00:39:55,290 -Someone killed... 769 00:39:55,290 --> 00:39:57,530 all the beer! 770 00:39:59,760 --> 00:40:01,460 -This can... 771 00:40:01,470 --> 00:40:02,870 Shotgunned. 772 00:40:02,870 --> 00:40:04,470 -Why?! 773 00:40:04,470 --> 00:40:07,200 Who would do such a thing?! 774 00:40:07,200 --> 00:40:09,040 -Did you know about his worst fear? 775 00:40:09,040 --> 00:40:10,070 -Running out of beer? 776 00:40:10,070 --> 00:40:11,140 -I think it's pretty clear. 777 00:40:12,840 --> 00:40:14,110 -We'll get to the bottom of this. 778 00:40:14,110 --> 00:40:17,180 But right now, beer run, pledge, now! 779 00:40:17,180 --> 00:40:18,080 -I'll take the pledge. 780 00:40:18,080 --> 00:40:19,080 I was planning on getting 781 00:40:19,080 --> 00:40:20,480 some candid nature shots anyway. 782 00:40:20,480 --> 00:40:22,050 -Yeah, yeah, sounds real great. 783 00:40:22,050 --> 00:40:24,290 Just one thing, pledge! 784 00:40:25,960 --> 00:40:29,060 Welcome to the beef box, population you. 785 00:40:29,060 --> 00:40:31,790 This is where you live now, in this thing. 786 00:40:31,800 --> 00:40:34,060 Lick the inside for a 3-D experience, 787 00:40:34,060 --> 00:40:37,170 you little shit bag. 788 00:40:37,170 --> 00:40:39,300 -All these bills! 789 00:40:39,300 --> 00:40:40,940 Aaaaah! 790 00:40:40,940 --> 00:40:41,940 -Your vagina -- 791 00:40:45,340 --> 00:40:48,280 -Uh, you sure you don't want me to call my dad, 792 00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:50,080 just have him come pick us up? -No! 793 00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:52,180 I've got to fix this on my own! 794 00:40:52,180 --> 00:40:54,950 Plus, you murdered a guy! -Hey! 795 00:40:54,950 --> 00:40:56,420 Stuff happens, Candace. 796 00:40:56,420 --> 00:40:58,420 That's the real world we live in. 797 00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:02,360 Well, the wolves are coming. 798 00:41:02,360 --> 00:41:04,090 Let's spend the night here. 799 00:41:04,090 --> 00:41:06,260 Clean up the dead parts in the morning. 800 00:41:16,170 --> 00:41:18,840 - What's wrong? 801 00:41:18,840 --> 00:41:20,110 -I'm sorry. 802 00:41:20,110 --> 00:41:23,880 I've just had a hard time sleeping since... 803 00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:25,310 -Since what? 804 00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:28,550 -The Dude Bro sophomore-year prank. 805 00:41:28,550 --> 00:41:30,350 -Oh, yeah. 806 00:41:30,350 --> 00:41:31,550 The sophomore-year prank. 807 00:41:31,560 --> 00:41:34,260 I remember it well. 808 00:41:34,260 --> 00:41:35,960 -Time's up, Sminkle. 809 00:41:35,960 --> 00:41:38,430 But you know what you can get for another $200, right? 810 00:41:38,430 --> 00:41:41,030 -Who the fuck do you think you're talking to, Fantasia?! 811 00:41:41,030 --> 00:41:42,560 I own this fucking town! 812 00:41:44,130 --> 00:41:47,500 I am eternal! 813 00:41:47,500 --> 00:41:50,340 Well, I don't really remember the sophomore-year prank, 814 00:41:50,340 --> 00:41:53,640 but I'm sure it was something awful. 815 00:41:53,640 --> 00:41:56,280 We're gonna get those Dude Bros, Candace. 816 00:41:56,280 --> 00:41:58,550 I don't know if you've ever... 817 00:41:58,550 --> 00:42:01,480 bopped anybody on the nose before, but, uh... 818 00:42:01,490 --> 00:42:04,950 it sure brings about a lot of closure. 819 00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:07,520 -Yeah. -Oh, um, I kind of sleep 820 00:42:07,520 --> 00:42:09,630 with my eyes open. 821 00:42:09,630 --> 00:42:11,090 It's just a thing. 822 00:42:11,100 --> 00:42:12,290 -It's okay. 823 00:42:12,300 --> 00:42:14,560 -Hang in there, partner. 824 00:42:14,570 --> 00:42:16,470 Good night. 825 00:42:16,470 --> 00:42:18,400 -Good night. 826 00:42:22,610 --> 00:42:24,510 Sminkle? 827 00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:44,990 -Z.Q., I can't see a thing in this thing. 828 00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:47,400 -Life is tough in the beef box, pledge. 829 00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:49,030 You know, you can get out of that box 830 00:42:49,030 --> 00:42:51,000 if you just man up and beef. 831 00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:52,470 I beefed on day five. 832 00:42:52,470 --> 00:42:55,170 Spike, he beefed like every hour. 833 00:42:55,170 --> 00:42:57,040 It's like, "Spike, slow your roll, man. 834 00:42:57,040 --> 00:42:59,940 Don't beef so fast." He wouldn't listen. 835 00:42:59,940 --> 00:43:02,950 Turbeaux, he beefed before he even got in there. 836 00:43:02,950 --> 00:43:04,110 Dude's a machine. 837 00:43:04,110 --> 00:43:05,510 -Those guys seem pretty wild. 838 00:43:05,520 --> 00:43:08,050 -So fucking wild. 839 00:43:08,050 --> 00:43:09,990 -Can I tell you something, Z.Q., 840 00:43:09,990 --> 00:43:11,490 something I haven't told anyone? 841 00:43:11,490 --> 00:43:13,320 -Sure, Sizzler. 842 00:43:13,320 --> 00:43:16,360 -Sometimes, I think those guys don't respect me. 843 00:43:16,360 --> 00:43:18,960 And I'll never be a Delta Bi 844 00:43:18,960 --> 00:43:21,400 even if I get out of this cold beef box. 845 00:43:21,400 --> 00:43:23,570 -Delta Bis have to have confidence. 846 00:43:23,570 --> 00:43:25,330 In there, you have to think on your feet, 847 00:43:25,340 --> 00:43:27,340 'cause it's all you've got. 848 00:43:27,340 --> 00:43:30,670 My advice, if you're getting cold, just beef. 849 00:43:30,670 --> 00:43:33,240 Get a good steam going. -I don't want to beef. 850 00:43:33,240 --> 00:43:35,480 -Let go of your fears and beef. 851 00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:37,150 -My fear is beef! 852 00:43:37,150 --> 00:43:40,620 And pork and chicken and all that gross stuff! 853 00:43:40,620 --> 00:43:42,280 No one respects that. 854 00:43:42,290 --> 00:43:43,650 I'll never fit in here. 855 00:43:43,650 --> 00:43:45,090 -Don't get cranky with me, pledge! 856 00:43:45,090 --> 00:43:46,590 Just because I like you 857 00:43:46,590 --> 00:43:48,620 doesn't mean you're getting out of that box early. 858 00:43:51,160 --> 00:43:52,760 You, uh -- you hungry? 859 00:43:54,700 --> 00:43:59,000 You know, through my lens, I see the souls of my bros. 860 00:43:59,000 --> 00:44:01,370 I've seen your inner truth. 861 00:44:01,370 --> 00:44:03,110 You've got beef in you. 862 00:44:03,110 --> 00:44:04,440 I'm not gonna let you quit. 863 00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:06,240 You have too much potential. 864 00:44:57,790 --> 00:45:01,060 Oh, Brock, how am I supposed to avenge you 865 00:45:01,070 --> 00:45:04,530 if I can't find any stupid clues? 866 00:45:05,330 --> 00:45:07,740 Anyway, good to see you, like -- 867 00:45:09,240 --> 00:45:10,640 Whoa. 868 00:45:21,450 --> 00:45:23,520 Oh! 869 00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:25,520 Clues! 870 00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:27,390 -Oh, no! 871 00:45:31,130 --> 00:45:33,600 -Can you hold my hair back, bro? 872 00:45:35,730 --> 00:45:37,730 -Clues! 873 00:45:40,770 --> 00:45:42,240 -Brock. 874 00:45:42,240 --> 00:45:44,570 Is that you, Brock? 875 00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:50,380 -Yes. -Strange. 876 00:45:50,380 --> 00:45:55,320 I have memories of your corpse, a flagpole... 877 00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:56,320 your anus. 878 00:45:57,590 --> 00:45:59,290 -Must have been a dream. 879 00:45:59,290 --> 00:46:00,520 -I don't dream. 880 00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:02,520 -You should try it. It's fun. 881 00:46:02,530 --> 00:46:04,860 You can fly, you can fuck whatever you want. 882 00:46:04,860 --> 00:46:06,700 It's great. 883 00:46:06,700 --> 00:46:09,360 -What's that on your face, Brock? 884 00:46:09,370 --> 00:46:11,570 -It's chocolate. 885 00:46:13,670 --> 00:46:15,770 I'm saving it for later. 886 00:46:15,770 --> 00:46:16,810 -Did you miss your brother? 887 00:46:16,810 --> 00:46:18,770 -Brent? 888 00:46:18,780 --> 00:46:22,210 No, he -- he's a loser. 889 00:46:24,250 --> 00:46:25,750 -Peculiar. 890 00:46:25,750 --> 00:46:27,620 You used to cry every night 891 00:46:27,620 --> 00:46:31,850 for having pushed him away to keep him safe from this... 892 00:46:31,860 --> 00:46:33,420 nightmare. 893 00:46:35,420 --> 00:46:37,390 Dance with me, Brock. 894 00:46:37,390 --> 00:46:39,760 Dance with me, just like we did in 1986 895 00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:41,630 at the rhythm and blues mixer. 896 00:46:41,630 --> 00:46:43,570 -That's when the second string of murders started happening! 897 00:46:43,570 --> 00:46:45,570 Do you remember -- -Dance now. 898 00:46:45,570 --> 00:46:47,900 -But my investigation -- -Now we dance. 899 00:47:07,860 --> 00:47:09,220 Catch me. 900 00:47:11,460 --> 00:47:12,860 -Whoa! 901 00:47:12,860 --> 00:47:14,700 Heavy! 902 00:47:14,700 --> 00:47:15,860 Ohh! 903 00:47:15,870 --> 00:47:18,330 Oh, no! Oh, no. 904 00:47:18,340 --> 00:47:19,800 No, no, no, no, no. Come on. 905 00:47:19,800 --> 00:47:21,770 Sam-- Samzy? 906 00:47:21,770 --> 00:47:24,840 You're okay! You're okay, Samzy! 907 00:47:24,840 --> 00:47:28,580 Heavy! Come on! Come on! 908 00:47:28,580 --> 00:47:29,880 Think, Brent. Think, Brent. 909 00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:31,580 Everybody likes you. You're a good guy. 910 00:47:31,580 --> 00:47:33,620 They'll believe you. Samzy, Samzy... 911 00:47:33,620 --> 00:47:35,520 -Oh, my God! 912 00:47:37,620 --> 00:47:40,760 I see what's going on here. 913 00:47:40,760 --> 00:47:43,490 He's wasted on beer! 914 00:47:43,490 --> 00:47:45,760 You lied to me! 915 00:47:45,760 --> 00:47:47,830 Aah! 916 00:47:51,330 --> 00:47:52,670 -This coffee's so lame. 917 00:47:52,670 --> 00:47:56,270 -Aah! -Did somebody say orange juice? 918 00:47:56,270 --> 00:47:58,270 -Oh, oh, oh God! 919 00:47:58,280 --> 00:47:59,840 The beer! 920 00:47:59,840 --> 00:48:02,280 Oh, God! Oh, God! 921 00:48:02,280 --> 00:48:03,950 Oh, fuck you, tree! No! 922 00:48:03,950 --> 00:48:08,650 Oh, beer! No! No! 923 00:48:08,650 --> 00:48:10,890 Oh, God, no! Oh, no! 924 00:48:10,890 --> 00:48:11,990 Aah! 925 00:48:18,490 --> 00:48:20,800 Oh, it can't be! 926 00:48:20,800 --> 00:48:23,300 Oh, beer! 927 00:48:23,300 --> 00:48:25,770 Beer! 928 00:48:25,770 --> 00:48:27,370 Oh, beer! 929 00:48:27,370 --> 00:48:29,670 Oh! 930 00:48:29,670 --> 00:48:33,680 Oh, it's still cold! 931 00:48:33,680 --> 00:48:35,780 Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho! 932 00:48:35,780 --> 00:48:37,450 Oh! 933 00:48:37,450 --> 00:48:41,520 Oh, perfect! Now I just need the tap. 934 00:48:42,020 --> 00:48:43,720 Where's the... 935 00:48:43,720 --> 00:48:45,290 Where's the tap?! 936 00:49:16,020 --> 00:49:18,390 -It's all head. 937 00:49:25,490 --> 00:49:27,600 -So, Hamlet's not in the play. 938 00:49:27,600 --> 00:49:29,730 -No, he's in it. It's just not about him. 939 00:49:29,730 --> 00:49:31,370 It's about these two side characters 940 00:49:31,370 --> 00:49:32,570 that nobody thought were important. 941 00:49:32,570 --> 00:49:34,870 -Seems unnecessarily pretentious. 942 00:49:37,870 --> 00:49:39,810 -What?! Aah! 943 00:49:39,810 --> 00:49:41,340 -Boom! 944 00:49:41,350 --> 00:49:43,040 Oh, yeah! 945 00:49:46,820 --> 00:49:48,480 -All right, pledge. 946 00:49:48,490 --> 00:49:49,750 You're in the final stretch 947 00:49:49,750 --> 00:49:51,950 of the Delta Bi biannual bicep gauntlet. 948 00:49:51,960 --> 00:49:53,790 You've lost to pretty much every bro here. 949 00:49:53,790 --> 00:49:54,990 Now you're gonna face me. 950 00:49:54,990 --> 00:49:55,990 And if you lose, 951 00:49:55,990 --> 00:49:57,490 you're going in the barrel, 952 00:49:57,490 --> 00:49:58,590 and I'm gonna read what you've been writing 953 00:49:58,600 --> 00:50:00,460 in that stupid diary of yours! 954 00:50:00,460 --> 00:50:02,000 -My journal. 955 00:50:02,000 --> 00:50:03,800 -All right. 956 00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:05,370 -Kick his ass. 957 00:50:05,370 --> 00:50:07,000 3, tres, go! 958 00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:12,510 -I already know what today's entry's gonna be. 959 00:50:12,510 --> 00:50:13,740 "Dear Diary, I lost, 960 00:50:13,740 --> 00:50:15,610 and now I'm in a barrel." -No. 961 00:50:15,610 --> 00:50:16,640 -Yeah! -No. 962 00:50:16,650 --> 00:50:17,950 -Yeah! -Please. 963 00:50:17,950 --> 00:50:19,810 -"Please" what? -Please don't beat me! 964 00:50:19,820 --> 00:50:20,920 -Okay. Maybe. 965 00:50:20,920 --> 00:50:22,920 Just kidding. -Ohh! 966 00:50:22,920 --> 00:50:25,050 - Aah! 967 00:50:25,060 --> 00:50:26,990 -Yeah! -Yay! 968 00:50:26,990 --> 00:50:28,520 -Hey, guys! -Aww! 969 00:50:28,530 --> 00:50:30,760 -Babe, what the fuck are you doing here?! 970 00:50:30,760 --> 00:50:32,130 -Yeah! What the fuck, Samantha?! 971 00:50:32,130 --> 00:50:33,600 -What the fuck, Todd?! 972 00:50:33,600 --> 00:50:34,800 You can't let your girlfriend come! 973 00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:35,800 You know the rules! 974 00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:36,970 -I didn't let her come! 975 00:50:36,970 --> 00:50:37,930 What?! 976 00:50:37,930 --> 00:50:39,770 Babe, you can't be here. 977 00:50:39,770 --> 00:50:42,000 -I know you guys like beer, so I brought beer 978 00:50:42,010 --> 00:50:43,810 so you guys like me. Right? 979 00:50:43,810 --> 00:50:46,880 -We can like beer without having to like you, Samantha. 980 00:50:46,880 --> 00:50:48,940 Samzy, get the beer! -Sorry. 981 00:50:48,950 --> 00:50:51,880 -See? Now we hate her. -Yeah, fuck her. 982 00:50:51,880 --> 00:50:54,050 -Don't we have an extra room? -Oh, yeah. 983 00:50:54,050 --> 00:50:55,150 We got all the room in the world. 984 00:50:55,150 --> 00:50:56,850 It's called outside! 985 00:50:56,850 --> 00:50:59,650 -The rules do state that during bicep bi-annuals, 986 00:50:59,660 --> 00:51:03,560 all females have to stay outside... 987 00:51:03,560 --> 00:51:05,530 where there is more room. 988 00:51:05,530 --> 00:51:06,830 -But I brought beer, 989 00:51:06,830 --> 00:51:08,830 and you guys stole my motor home! 990 00:51:08,830 --> 00:51:10,730 -Todd, you broke the rules. You got to go with her. 991 00:51:10,730 --> 00:51:12,430 -You can't let me go outside with her! 992 00:51:12,440 --> 00:51:14,970 She's gonna try and take my virginity. 993 00:51:14,970 --> 00:51:16,910 -No, I would never. 994 00:51:16,910 --> 00:51:18,470 -If I remember correctly, 995 00:51:18,480 --> 00:51:22,210 and I do, there's a tent in the shed out back. 996 00:51:22,210 --> 00:51:24,710 -Yep, there's a tent in the shed. 997 00:51:24,710 --> 00:51:26,450 -The tent's located in the shed. 998 00:51:26,450 --> 00:51:28,550 -That's where the tent is. In the shed. 999 00:51:28,550 --> 00:51:30,890 -Tent's in the shed. Tent's in the shed. 1000 00:51:30,890 --> 00:51:32,450 Tent's in the shed. 1001 00:51:32,460 --> 00:51:33,560 -No! 1002 00:51:33,560 --> 00:51:34,820 -What's it gonna be? 1003 00:51:34,830 --> 00:51:37,560 Are you a Delta Bi or a Samantha guy? 1004 00:51:40,830 --> 00:51:42,730 -What do you think? 1005 00:51:50,140 --> 00:51:51,740 -Tent's in the shed. 1006 00:51:55,210 --> 00:51:58,610 -Looks like you get a stay of execution, pledge. 1007 00:52:05,690 --> 00:52:07,820 -I don't even want to look at you right now! 1008 00:52:07,820 --> 00:52:14,200 You've ruined my l-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ife! 1009 00:52:14,200 --> 00:52:16,560 We're getting this tent, and we're going to bed! 1010 00:52:16,570 --> 00:52:18,270 That's it! 1011 00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:23,040 -Oh, that's fine! That's fine. 1012 00:52:23,040 --> 00:52:24,110 -Babe... -We can just go to bed. 1013 00:52:24,110 --> 00:52:25,610 -Yeah, I'm tired. 1014 00:52:25,610 --> 00:52:26,880 -I didn't mean to get you kicked out. 1015 00:52:26,880 --> 00:52:28,180 -Babe... -I am so sorry 1016 00:52:28,180 --> 00:52:29,980 that I'm a girl, baby. -You should be! 1017 00:52:29,980 --> 00:52:31,610 -Who needs the Delta Bis? 1018 00:52:31,620 --> 00:52:33,210 I think they're just jealous of you anyway. 1019 00:52:33,220 --> 00:52:35,250 -Babe, babe! 1020 00:52:35,250 --> 00:52:36,950 -Yeah, you are the smartest bro in the frat. 1021 00:52:36,950 --> 00:52:39,920 I mean, you've got career prospects, healthy gums, 1022 00:52:39,920 --> 00:52:41,760 I mean, amazing bone structure. -Stop. Your hands are cold. 1023 00:52:41,760 --> 00:52:43,220 -That tickles. -Your body is 1024 00:52:43,230 --> 00:52:45,630 so fucking jacked and fertile! 1025 00:52:45,630 --> 00:52:48,830 It's like your sperm count must be in the billions or something. 1026 00:52:48,830 --> 00:52:50,900 -Oh, oh! 1027 00:52:50,900 --> 00:52:52,530 Babe... -I mean, those Delta Bis 1028 00:52:52,540 --> 00:52:55,940 should be getting on their knees to worship you. 1029 00:52:55,940 --> 00:52:57,610 -Tell me more about my bros. 1030 00:52:57,610 --> 00:52:59,570 -Oh. Found it. 1031 00:53:01,010 --> 00:53:03,550 -Oh. 1032 00:53:03,550 --> 00:53:05,250 Oh, Samantha. 1033 00:53:05,250 --> 00:53:06,650 Oh, baby. 1034 00:53:06,650 --> 00:53:08,080 -Stay on target. -Oh, Sam. 1035 00:53:08,080 --> 00:53:09,920 -Eye on the prize! 1036 00:53:09,920 --> 00:53:11,590 -These air holes you poked in the condom aren't working, babe. 1037 00:53:11,590 --> 00:53:12,790 -No, stay the course! 1038 00:53:12,790 --> 00:53:14,560 -Little Todd still can't breathe. 1039 00:53:14,560 --> 00:53:17,130 He looks like a -- a dude jammed into something. 1040 00:53:17,130 --> 00:53:18,960 -It's usually hard. 1041 00:53:18,960 --> 00:53:20,560 -It normally is! 1042 00:53:20,560 --> 00:53:21,900 -Does this help? 1043 00:53:21,900 --> 00:53:24,570 -Yeah. Yeah, that's better. -Okay, good. 1044 00:53:24,570 --> 00:53:26,330 -Okay. -You've got this, Todd! 1045 00:53:26,340 --> 00:53:28,000 You are in the zone! 1046 00:53:28,000 --> 00:53:30,200 You are in the home stretch! -Please! 1047 00:53:30,210 --> 00:53:32,170 -You are killing it back there! -Don't look at me! 1048 00:53:34,880 --> 00:53:38,210 -Ahh, I'm having sex. 1049 00:53:38,210 --> 00:53:40,950 -Don't you quit now, boy! Don't you quit now! 1050 00:53:40,950 --> 00:53:42,350 -Now -- now I lost it. 1051 00:53:42,350 --> 00:53:44,750 -Put your Delta Bi seed in me! 1052 00:53:44,750 --> 00:53:46,050 -My seed?! 1053 00:53:46,060 --> 00:53:47,990 Aah! 1054 00:53:56,900 --> 00:53:59,070 -Thank you, Toddy. 1055 00:54:01,710 --> 00:54:02,800 Mm. 1056 00:54:04,840 --> 00:54:06,640 -Should've pulled out. 1057 00:54:11,820 --> 00:54:13,210 -How much further, Z.Q.? 1058 00:54:13,220 --> 00:54:15,720 -Our journey will end when it ends, Sizzler. 1059 00:54:15,720 --> 00:54:17,650 And once you beef, a whole new journey 1060 00:54:17,650 --> 00:54:18,720 begins for you. 1061 00:54:18,720 --> 00:54:20,990 - Oh! 1062 00:54:20,990 --> 00:54:23,730 What's that?! -Tree noises. 1063 00:54:25,760 --> 00:54:27,330 Aah! 1064 00:54:33,040 --> 00:54:34,670 Oh. Oh, no! 1065 00:54:34,670 --> 00:54:37,040 Oh! -Z.Q., are you okay?! 1066 00:54:37,040 --> 00:54:38,740 -No! I'm not okay! 1067 00:54:38,740 --> 00:54:40,340 Kick my camera in my general direction! 1068 00:54:40,340 --> 00:54:42,040 This is an incredible scene! 1069 00:54:42,050 --> 00:54:43,750 -I'm getting out of this thing. -No! 1070 00:54:43,750 --> 00:54:44,810 -But I could save you! I just 1071 00:54:44,810 --> 00:54:45,910 have to get out of this box! 1072 00:54:45,920 --> 00:54:48,750 -Not until you beef! Sizzler! 1073 00:54:52,290 --> 00:54:54,820 -I'm trapped! I'm trapped! 1074 00:54:56,160 --> 00:54:58,730 -No! Ha ha! I'm on my way! 1075 00:54:58,730 --> 00:54:59,890 I have a rope! 1076 00:54:59,900 --> 00:55:00,800 Hang tight, Sizzler! -Aah! 1077 00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:03,300 Aah! 1078 00:55:06,140 --> 00:55:08,900 Amazing! 1079 00:55:11,210 --> 00:55:12,970 -Rainin' men. 1080 00:55:13,940 --> 00:55:16,940 -Come on, Got to beef! 1081 00:55:16,950 --> 00:55:18,210 Got to beef! 1082 00:55:18,210 --> 00:55:21,720 I got to beef! Aaah! 1083 00:55:21,720 --> 00:55:28,260 Aaah! 1084 00:55:28,260 --> 00:55:31,230 -And the, uh, number-one reason 1085 00:55:31,230 --> 00:55:36,730 why cops just can't catch a break, uh... 1086 00:55:36,730 --> 00:55:38,000 My dad beat me, 1087 00:55:38,000 --> 00:55:40,700 and now I sleep with my eyes open! 1088 00:55:42,070 --> 00:55:43,140 -Boo! 1089 00:55:43,140 --> 00:55:44,270 -God! No! 1090 00:55:44,270 --> 00:55:46,270 -You can tell he's a virgin! 1091 00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:48,440 Oranges! 1092 00:55:48,450 --> 00:55:51,910 Oranges! Oranges! Get away from me! 1093 00:55:51,920 --> 00:55:53,980 -Sminkle! Wake up! 1094 00:55:53,980 --> 00:55:55,780 -Number 6, please don't kill me! 1095 00:55:55,790 --> 00:55:57,920 -It's just a dream! We've got to move this car, 1096 00:55:57,920 --> 00:55:59,390 and I can't do it on my own. 1097 00:55:59,390 --> 00:56:01,990 I need your muscles. -Oh. 1098 00:56:01,990 --> 00:56:04,460 Well, why didn't you say so? 1099 00:56:04,460 --> 00:56:07,230 All I need is a hearty breakfast and, uh... 1100 00:56:07,230 --> 00:56:08,900 Hey. 1101 00:56:08,900 --> 00:56:11,870 The wolves cleaned up all the deadness. 1102 00:56:11,870 --> 00:56:15,070 And they filled up the tires. 1103 00:56:15,070 --> 00:56:18,410 Boy...those wolves are... 1104 00:56:20,880 --> 00:56:24,180 ...getting pretty smart. 1105 00:56:24,180 --> 00:56:26,280 -Just push, damn it! 1106 00:56:26,280 --> 00:56:27,880 -Brace yourself, 1107 00:56:27,880 --> 00:56:31,290 'cause you just bought yourself a one-way ticket 1108 00:56:31,290 --> 00:56:34,490 to the motherfucking gun show! 1109 00:56:37,060 --> 00:56:42,400 Fu-- Havin' a good time at the gun show! 1110 00:56:42,400 --> 00:56:45,030 Havin' a good -- 1111 00:56:45,030 --> 00:56:48,900 Aah! Oh, those Dream Bros were right -- 1112 00:56:48,910 --> 00:56:52,040 I can't do anything right. 1113 00:56:52,040 --> 00:56:55,910 -Look, here are the top 10 reasons why Sminkle is great. 1114 00:56:55,910 --> 00:56:59,210 10, he greets every day with a smile. 1115 00:56:59,220 --> 00:57:01,850 9, he wants to help children. 1116 00:57:01,850 --> 00:57:04,050 -I want to bang children! 1117 00:57:04,050 --> 00:57:07,050 -8, he wants to bang children's minds. 1118 00:57:07,060 --> 00:57:09,490 -No, it's not as catchy. No, it's too long. 1119 00:57:09,490 --> 00:57:11,260 It's too thought-out. It's too involved. 1120 00:57:11,260 --> 00:57:13,430 -7, he wants to bang children. 1121 00:57:13,430 --> 00:57:16,300 -Bang 'em good. -Don't give up, Sminkle. 1122 00:57:16,300 --> 00:57:18,000 We got to get you to the lake house 1123 00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:20,230 so that you can solve Chico's orange crisis! 1124 00:57:20,240 --> 00:57:23,870 -Virgin strength! 1125 00:57:23,870 --> 00:57:27,210 -Ah! 6, he's asleep right now 1126 00:57:27,210 --> 00:57:28,110 yet still somehow pushing. 1127 00:57:28,110 --> 00:57:29,580 Uh... 1128 00:57:29,580 --> 00:57:31,550 I, uh... 1129 00:57:31,550 --> 00:57:33,450 2, he's awake right now, 1130 00:57:33,450 --> 00:57:34,820 and that's a good thing! 1131 00:57:36,890 --> 00:57:41,190 1, he probably doesn't deserve to die. 1132 00:57:43,060 --> 00:57:45,030 Yes! -Yes! 1133 00:57:45,030 --> 00:57:46,530 -Oh, my God! Yes, yes, yes, yes! 1134 00:57:46,530 --> 00:57:47,560 -Whoo-hoo-hoo! 1135 00:57:54,500 --> 00:57:56,070 -Oh, no. 1136 00:58:15,260 --> 00:58:16,890 -Oh, no. I forgot my keys! 1137 00:58:16,890 --> 00:58:18,230 Aah! 1138 00:58:18,230 --> 00:58:20,330 -Every year, thousands of idiots are -- 1139 00:58:30,310 --> 00:58:32,240 -Guys! 1140 00:58:48,420 --> 00:58:50,460 -Hey, friend, come on in. 1141 00:58:50,460 --> 00:58:52,430 It's nice, and it's warm. 1142 00:58:52,430 --> 00:58:55,400 -Quit remembering your dead brother and jump in the water. 1143 00:58:55,400 --> 00:58:56,900 -Brent, come on, man! 1144 00:58:56,900 --> 00:58:58,430 You can do it! Brent! 1145 00:58:58,430 --> 00:59:00,030 Oh, take off that shirt. 1146 00:59:00,040 --> 00:59:02,200 You'll love it! 1147 00:59:02,210 --> 00:59:04,110 -Come on in, bro. Get in the water. 1148 00:59:04,110 --> 00:59:06,440 -In the water! -It's so wet! 1149 00:59:06,440 --> 00:59:07,910 -Yay! 1150 00:59:07,910 --> 00:59:09,110 You did it! 1151 00:59:09,110 --> 00:59:11,380 Congrats, buddy. 1152 00:59:11,380 --> 00:59:13,180 -We're having such a good time. 1153 00:59:13,180 --> 00:59:16,280 -Aren't we, Brent? -Yeah. 1154 00:59:16,290 --> 00:59:18,450 I guess we are. 1155 00:59:18,450 --> 00:59:20,050 Yeah! 1156 00:59:20,060 --> 00:59:21,160 -Told you so. 1157 00:59:21,160 --> 00:59:22,960 -Nice catch. 1158 00:59:22,960 --> 00:59:24,260 -Whoa! -Oh, no! 1159 00:59:26,360 --> 00:59:27,600 -Daddy, no, don't go. 1160 00:59:27,600 --> 00:59:29,100 I'm sorry I'm a girl. 1161 00:59:29,100 --> 00:59:30,530 Daddy, no! No! 1162 00:59:30,530 --> 00:59:32,470 No, I promise I'll have you a grandson. 1163 00:59:32,470 --> 00:59:34,270 It'll make it all better! Wait. 1164 00:59:34,270 --> 00:59:35,670 What's that, daddy? 1165 00:59:35,670 --> 00:59:38,470 You -- you'll be right back? Oh, okay. 1166 00:59:38,470 --> 00:59:40,570 I'll wait here on the stoop for you. 1167 00:59:40,580 --> 00:59:42,210 Bye. 1168 00:59:42,210 --> 00:59:44,610 Mm. 1169 00:59:44,610 --> 00:59:46,480 Oh, Todd, I had the most wonderful -- 1170 00:59:46,480 --> 00:59:49,150 Aah! Aaaaaah! 1171 00:59:53,320 --> 00:59:55,420 -Whoo! Yeah! 1172 00:59:55,430 --> 00:59:57,090 -Shh! -Oh! 1173 00:59:57,090 --> 00:59:59,360 Look, guys, Z.Q.'s overcome his fear of heights! 1174 00:59:59,360 --> 01:00:00,560 -Wow! 1175 01:01:22,540 --> 01:01:24,210 -Oh, my God! Torsos! 1176 01:01:24,510 --> 01:01:27,050 -Hey! Todd is dead! Help me! 1177 01:01:36,060 --> 01:01:37,590 -So, Z.Q.'s dead? 1178 01:01:37,590 --> 01:01:39,730 Samantha shows up covered in blood? 1179 01:01:39,730 --> 01:01:42,600 I knew she couldn't be trusted, but she's a killer! 1180 01:01:42,600 --> 01:01:44,730 - Please let me in! 1181 01:01:44,730 --> 01:01:47,470 I just got punched in the face, and my boyfriend's dead! 1182 01:01:47,470 --> 01:01:50,600 This weekend is not going at all how I planned it. 1183 01:01:50,610 --> 01:01:52,410 -Brent, you get the door. 1184 01:01:52,410 --> 01:01:54,680 Samzy, you played ball in college, right? 1185 01:01:54,680 --> 01:01:57,480 -Starting pitcher, East Chico Rapiers. 1186 01:01:57,480 --> 01:01:58,480 -Batter's up, bro. 1187 01:01:58,480 --> 01:01:59,610 -Guys, I don't know -- 1188 01:01:59,620 --> 01:02:01,120 -We're killing the killer! 1189 01:02:01,120 --> 01:02:03,820 It's just like old times, Brock! Remember? 1190 01:02:03,820 --> 01:02:06,090 Go, Rapiers! 1191 01:02:06,090 --> 01:02:07,320 -Please! 1192 01:02:07,320 --> 01:02:08,760 -Just move. 1193 01:02:08,760 --> 01:02:11,160 Your brother's more Rapier than you'll ever be. 1194 01:02:11,160 --> 01:02:13,130 -Please let me in! 1195 01:02:13,130 --> 01:02:15,260 -Who is it? -It's Samantha! 1196 01:02:15,260 --> 01:02:17,160 -Samantha who? 1197 01:02:17,170 --> 01:02:19,200 -Samantha Samantha! Let me in! 1198 01:02:19,200 --> 01:02:20,270 I'm Todd's girlfriend! 1199 01:02:20,270 --> 01:02:21,800 I've tried to bang all of you! 1200 01:02:21,800 --> 01:02:24,310 -Todd doesn't have a girlfriend. 1201 01:02:24,310 --> 01:02:26,270 He's still discovering himself. 1202 01:02:26,280 --> 01:02:27,880 -Just let me in. 1203 01:02:27,880 --> 01:02:30,240 -Okay. 1204 01:02:32,780 --> 01:02:34,120 -Ohh! 1205 01:02:34,120 --> 01:02:36,320 -Go, Rapiers! 1206 01:02:36,320 --> 01:02:38,790 -Wait a minute. Samantha couldn't be Motherface. 1207 01:02:38,790 --> 01:02:41,520 Todd told me she was on that Booze Cruise in Cabo 1208 01:02:41,520 --> 01:02:42,820 when Brock died. 1209 01:02:42,830 --> 01:02:45,130 Guys, Samantha couldn't be Motherface. 1210 01:02:45,130 --> 01:02:46,690 Todd told me she was on that Booze Cruise 1211 01:02:46,700 --> 01:02:48,130 in Cabo when Brock died. 1212 01:02:48,130 --> 01:02:49,400 -Whoa! 1213 01:02:49,400 --> 01:02:51,270 Motherface? -Motherface is dead! 1214 01:02:51,270 --> 01:02:52,570 We killed her twice, Brock, remember? 1215 01:02:52,570 --> 01:02:54,270 Rememb-- Br-Br-Broc-- Broc-- 1216 01:02:54,270 --> 01:02:55,500 Broc-- Broc-- 1217 01:02:55,510 --> 01:02:57,170 Broc-- Broc-- Broc-- 1218 01:02:57,170 --> 01:02:58,540 -Ba-gawk! She's dead. 1219 01:02:58,540 --> 01:03:00,370 Motherface is dead. -She's dead. 1220 01:03:00,380 --> 01:03:03,810 But Samantha is here, alive, covered in blood! 1221 01:03:03,810 --> 01:03:05,550 -We're all covered in blood! 1222 01:03:05,550 --> 01:03:07,920 Are you guys daft or something?! 1223 01:03:07,920 --> 01:03:10,220 Motherface is back! 1224 01:03:10,220 --> 01:03:13,190 She killed Todd, she killed Z.Q., 1225 01:03:13,190 --> 01:03:15,360 and she killed my brother, Brock! 1226 01:03:15,360 --> 01:03:16,790 -Samzy, throw another bat at him. 1227 01:03:16,790 --> 01:03:18,430 -I'm out of bats. -Fine. 1228 01:03:18,430 --> 01:03:21,230 I'll defeat him using good looks and logic. 1229 01:03:21,230 --> 01:03:24,200 You are stu-pid. 1230 01:03:24,200 --> 01:03:25,500 -Brock, you always had a plan 1231 01:03:25,500 --> 01:03:26,570 when these kinds of things happened. 1232 01:03:26,570 --> 01:03:27,570 Brock, What's the plan? 1233 01:03:27,570 --> 01:03:29,340 -Don't drag Brock into this! 1234 01:03:29,340 --> 01:03:32,410 -Don't tell him where to drag my dead brother! 1235 01:03:32,410 --> 01:03:35,510 I already lost him once when he joined the Delta Bis, 1236 01:03:35,510 --> 01:03:38,850 and then you let him get murdered by Motherface 1237 01:03:38,850 --> 01:03:40,610 right under your noses! 1238 01:03:40,620 --> 01:03:42,680 -That's fine. You know what? 1239 01:03:42,690 --> 01:03:43,780 I'm rescinding your pledge. 1240 01:03:43,790 --> 01:03:45,820 -Oh, no! 1241 01:03:45,820 --> 01:03:47,690 I don't care! 1242 01:03:47,690 --> 01:03:49,320 I'm not even here to pledge! 1243 01:03:49,330 --> 01:03:50,820 I'm here for Brock -- 1244 01:03:50,830 --> 01:03:54,630 to find out what happened to him and avenge his death, 1245 01:03:54,630 --> 01:03:58,470 not to bro out with you dudes! 1246 01:03:58,470 --> 01:04:01,200 -You lied to us. -No. 1247 01:04:01,200 --> 01:04:02,370 No, no, no, no, no. 1248 01:04:02,370 --> 01:04:04,940 -I trusted you! 1249 01:04:04,940 --> 01:04:08,380 -Who are you?! 1250 01:04:08,380 --> 01:04:11,480 -New plan -- time to beat the shit out of 1251 01:04:11,480 --> 01:04:13,610 dead Brock's living brother, Brent. 1252 01:04:14,920 --> 01:04:17,620 -Brock has a brother? -I told you, Samzy. 1253 01:04:17,620 --> 01:04:19,620 God damn it. -Oh, my God! 1254 01:04:19,620 --> 01:04:21,620 You're little Brent Chirino! 1255 01:04:21,620 --> 01:04:24,490 I have heard so much about you. 1256 01:04:24,490 --> 01:04:25,860 You can -- Wow. Okay. 1257 01:04:25,860 --> 01:04:28,260 So you can understand how meeting someone 1258 01:04:28,260 --> 01:04:30,460 that looks exactly like somebody that you thought was dead 1259 01:04:30,470 --> 01:04:33,330 would be exceptionally confusing. 1260 01:04:35,270 --> 01:04:39,240 -What the hell are you doing out of the beef box, pledge?! 1261 01:04:42,540 --> 01:04:45,010 -Amazing! 1262 01:04:47,480 --> 01:04:48,520 -Rainin' men. 1263 01:04:48,520 --> 01:04:50,020 -Oh, God -- Z.Q. 1264 01:04:50,020 --> 01:04:51,550 -Aah! -There! 1265 01:04:51,550 --> 01:04:53,920 That's where I beefed. 1266 01:04:53,920 --> 01:04:55,820 -Pause the tape. 1267 01:04:57,890 --> 01:05:00,590 Enhance. 1268 01:05:00,600 --> 01:05:04,030 I said enhance, damn you! 1269 01:05:04,030 --> 01:05:07,300 Now squint. 1270 01:05:07,300 --> 01:05:08,400 -Motherface! 1271 01:05:08,400 --> 01:05:09,670 -Who? -I knew it. 1272 01:05:09,670 --> 01:05:10,700 -Yes. -Whoa. 1273 01:05:10,710 --> 01:05:13,010 -It's true. 1274 01:05:13,010 --> 01:05:14,540 She's back. 1275 01:05:14,540 --> 01:05:16,040 But I've been investigating, 1276 01:05:16,050 --> 01:05:19,910 and I think I know who she is and how to stop her. 1277 01:05:19,920 --> 01:05:21,920 I thought I could do it alone. 1278 01:05:21,920 --> 01:05:23,650 But I need you. 1279 01:05:25,750 --> 01:05:27,350 You're the only bros I have left. 1280 01:05:27,360 --> 01:05:32,290 -Step aside, Brock's identical twin brother. 1281 01:05:32,300 --> 01:05:34,800 Let a real Delta Bi handle this. 1282 01:05:34,800 --> 01:05:38,070 You see, after surviving two party massacres myself, 1283 01:05:38,070 --> 01:05:42,740 I grew weary of relying on Brock's plans to save us all. 1284 01:05:42,740 --> 01:05:46,010 To wit, I created an identical robot duplicate of myself 1285 01:05:46,010 --> 01:05:50,780 for one, singular purpose -- to kill Motherface. 1286 01:05:50,780 --> 01:05:54,580 -Weird. -It's up in the attic. 1287 01:05:54,580 --> 01:05:56,550 -Oh! 1288 01:05:56,550 --> 01:05:58,450 Oh! That's it! 1289 01:05:58,450 --> 01:05:59,850 Robot! 1290 01:05:59,860 --> 01:06:01,690 In the attic. 1291 01:06:01,690 --> 01:06:03,690 -Oh! -Okay. 1292 01:06:03,690 --> 01:06:07,430 Well, with that in mind, you bros just kick your feet up 1293 01:06:07,430 --> 01:06:09,730 and let me and Robo-Samzy take care of this one. 1294 01:06:09,730 --> 01:06:11,470 -I don't know if you should -- -Just, uh... 1295 01:06:15,470 --> 01:06:17,740 That's odd. There appears to be some kind of malfunction. 1296 01:06:17,740 --> 01:06:19,870 I'll just do a quick check -- -No! No! 1297 01:06:19,880 --> 01:06:23,340 I was just thinking, maybe, if that doesn't work, 1298 01:06:23,350 --> 01:06:25,750 then we should have a plan B. 1299 01:06:25,750 --> 01:06:28,080 - I got this one. 1300 01:06:28,080 --> 01:06:30,750 -Yeah, there he goes. 1301 01:06:30,750 --> 01:06:33,550 -Secret door open. 1302 01:06:33,560 --> 01:06:36,120 -And there he's going. 1303 01:06:36,130 --> 01:06:38,660 Oh, Jesus. -Robo-Samzy? 1304 01:06:38,660 --> 01:06:39,830 Robo-Samzy?! 1305 01:06:39,830 --> 01:06:41,900 Oh, no! Robo-Samzy! 1306 01:06:41,900 --> 01:06:44,630 You didn't try to dance, did you?! 1307 01:06:44,630 --> 01:06:48,000 You beautiful fool! Who did this to you?! 1308 01:06:48,000 --> 01:06:51,140 -It was...Bro... 1309 01:06:55,780 --> 01:06:57,680 -What is going on?! 1310 01:07:00,680 --> 01:07:06,620 Aah! Aah! Aah! 1311 01:07:06,620 --> 01:07:08,420 Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! 1312 01:07:08,420 --> 01:07:10,060 -I don't like that guy. 1313 01:07:12,390 --> 01:07:13,790 -Aah! Aah! 1314 01:07:18,430 --> 01:07:19,800 -What is happening?! 1315 01:07:19,800 --> 01:07:21,600 I had a plan this time! 1316 01:07:21,600 --> 01:07:23,100 I watched you die! 1317 01:07:23,110 --> 01:07:23,970 Twice! 1318 01:07:27,840 --> 01:07:28,780 Hmm? 1319 01:07:33,480 --> 01:07:35,450 -Why are you hitting yourself, huh? 1320 01:07:38,820 --> 01:07:41,090 -What are you -- I'm a little bitch! 1321 01:07:41,090 --> 01:07:44,020 I'm a little bitch! 1322 01:07:44,030 --> 01:07:45,860 I'm a little bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, 1323 01:07:45,860 --> 01:07:48,130 bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch! 1324 01:07:48,130 --> 01:07:49,460 -You killed my mother. 1325 01:07:51,530 --> 01:07:52,800 And my sister. 1326 01:07:55,040 --> 01:07:57,540 You at least deserve a tongue-lashing. 1327 01:07:57,540 --> 01:07:58,940 -Aah! 1328 01:07:58,940 --> 01:08:00,170 Aah! Aah! 1329 01:08:00,180 --> 01:08:03,010 Aah! Aah! 1330 01:08:03,010 --> 01:08:05,080 Aah! 1331 01:08:15,120 --> 01:08:17,860 -What? No tongue? 1332 01:08:40,620 --> 01:08:42,650 -Call now, and we'll send you a second -- 1333 01:08:42,650 --> 01:08:44,850 Are you bored of the same -- 1334 01:08:44,850 --> 01:08:47,620 - No, no. Please. Please, God. 1335 01:08:47,620 --> 01:08:48,920 Please. Oh, no. 1336 01:08:48,920 --> 01:08:50,520 Oh, God, Candace. 1337 01:08:57,870 --> 01:09:01,130 Oh, God! 1338 01:09:06,040 --> 01:09:07,980 Virgin...tears. 1339 01:09:07,980 --> 01:09:09,010 --Aah. 1340 01:09:09,010 --> 01:09:11,080 Ugh. 1341 01:09:11,080 --> 01:09:13,010 Ew. 1342 01:09:13,020 --> 01:09:15,850 -You saved my life. -Well, yeah, you big dummy. 1343 01:09:15,850 --> 01:09:18,020 I mean, you know, honestly, this is the longest time 1344 01:09:18,020 --> 01:09:19,290 I've ever spent with another person, 1345 01:09:19,290 --> 01:09:20,950 and I've never really had a friend, 1346 01:09:20,960 --> 01:09:22,260 and no one's ever listened to my top 10 lists before 1347 01:09:22,260 --> 01:09:23,720 or had such pretty hair, 1348 01:09:23,730 --> 01:09:25,060 and when we were flying through the air, 1349 01:09:25,060 --> 01:09:26,790 I really thought we had a moment there, 1350 01:09:26,800 --> 01:09:28,160 and I honestly thought I could spend the rest of my life 1351 01:09:28,160 --> 01:09:29,860 flying through the air next to this person! 1352 01:09:29,870 --> 01:09:30,900 And I was honestly glad we didn't wear seat belts! 1353 01:09:30,900 --> 01:09:32,100 You know, fuck safety! 1354 01:09:32,100 --> 01:09:33,970 And I really thought that I lost you! 1355 01:09:33,970 --> 01:09:35,140 -Oh, Sminkle. 1356 01:09:35,140 --> 01:09:37,940 -Oh, Candace. 1357 01:09:37,940 --> 01:09:39,210 -I'm sorry. 1358 01:09:39,210 --> 01:09:40,610 -There's another guy, isn't there. 1359 01:09:40,610 --> 01:09:41,780 Gosh darn it. I should've known. 1360 01:09:41,780 --> 01:09:44,280 Classic Candace. 1361 01:09:44,280 --> 01:09:46,780 - Nice work, officer. 1362 01:09:55,160 --> 01:09:56,890 -Hey. 1363 01:09:56,890 --> 01:09:59,590 Sorry I abandoned you back there. 1364 01:09:59,600 --> 01:10:01,060 -That's okay, daddy -- 1365 01:10:01,060 --> 01:10:03,600 - I mean, Brent. - Brent. 1366 01:10:06,270 --> 01:10:08,200 I'm cold. 1367 01:10:23,280 --> 01:10:24,920 Are we gonna die, Brent? 1368 01:10:36,030 --> 01:10:37,800 -Hey, Sizzler, great job. 1369 01:10:37,800 --> 01:10:39,830 Why don't you go fuck off for a sec, all right? 1370 01:10:39,840 --> 01:10:43,240 -Sure. I'll go get my organic veggies upstairs. 1371 01:10:43,240 --> 01:10:44,910 -Grab a big bag of dicks. I don't care. 1372 01:10:47,640 --> 01:10:50,040 -Hey. 1373 01:10:50,050 --> 01:10:51,880 -Brock meant a lot to me. 1374 01:10:51,880 --> 01:10:55,250 And I thought, like a idiot, 1375 01:10:55,250 --> 01:10:57,620 that maybe you'd be like him, 1376 01:10:57,620 --> 01:10:59,220 and we could go on like nothing ever happened. 1377 01:10:59,220 --> 01:11:01,720 But something did happen. 1378 01:11:01,720 --> 01:11:02,790 You lied to me! 1379 01:11:02,790 --> 01:11:04,020 -Turbeaux, you can trust me. 1380 01:11:04,030 --> 01:11:05,860 We're in this together. -No! 1381 01:11:05,860 --> 01:11:08,030 Brock planned all my workouts for me! 1382 01:11:08,030 --> 01:11:10,300 We were supposed to do traps and lats the day he died! 1383 01:11:10,300 --> 01:11:12,130 Now look at me! 1384 01:11:12,130 --> 01:11:15,770 -If we do 10 sets of 20 reps on the lat pull-down machine, 1385 01:11:15,770 --> 01:11:19,170 I swear, we will sculpt you the V-taper of your dreams. 1386 01:11:19,170 --> 01:11:20,910 -You lied to me! 1387 01:11:20,910 --> 01:11:22,640 -I swear, I will never lie to you again. 1388 01:11:22,650 --> 01:11:23,980 -What if it's my birthday? 1389 01:11:23,980 --> 01:11:25,850 You take me to a quiet little bistro dinner. 1390 01:11:25,850 --> 01:11:27,180 Nothing too fancy? 1391 01:11:27,180 --> 01:11:29,750 And then you act like you "forgot your keys." 1392 01:11:29,750 --> 01:11:30,850 Then the lights go out. 1393 01:11:30,850 --> 01:11:32,290 Who turned out the lights? 1394 01:11:32,290 --> 01:11:33,990 Then the lights go back on. 1395 01:11:33,990 --> 01:11:35,360 All my friends are there. 1396 01:11:35,360 --> 01:11:36,890 And you know what it is? 1397 01:11:36,890 --> 01:11:40,190 It's a goddamn surprise birthday party! 1398 01:11:40,200 --> 01:11:44,200 Garcon, bring out the fucking raspberry brown butter torte 1399 01:11:44,200 --> 01:11:47,700 that reads "Happy 23rd B-Day, Turbeaux! 1400 01:11:47,700 --> 01:11:50,200 Love your lying friend, 1401 01:11:50,210 --> 01:11:52,770 the sack of shit that he is, Brent!" 1402 01:11:52,780 --> 01:11:55,380 -I swear, I will ruin every surprise party 1403 01:11:55,380 --> 01:11:57,680 that anyone ever throws you! 1404 01:11:57,680 --> 01:11:58,880 -But I love surprises! 1405 01:11:58,880 --> 01:12:00,150 -What's your problem, man?! 1406 01:12:00,150 --> 01:12:02,750 -I have a hairy dick! 1407 01:12:08,090 --> 01:12:09,220 -Wh-what? 1408 01:12:11,690 --> 01:12:14,700 -You know how I hate little baby dogs 1409 01:12:14,700 --> 01:12:17,060 and their little hairy baby dog dicks? 1410 01:12:17,070 --> 01:12:18,470 -Yeah, I guess, yeah. 1411 01:12:18,470 --> 01:12:22,000 -When I look at a little baby dog, Brent... 1412 01:12:22,000 --> 01:12:25,070 I see the parts of me that I hate! 1413 01:12:25,070 --> 01:12:28,440 I hate my little hairy baby dog dick! 1414 01:12:29,710 --> 01:12:31,240 -That's cool, man. 1415 01:12:31,250 --> 01:12:34,150 That's...That's normal... 1416 01:12:34,150 --> 01:12:38,250 for us...to have...problems... 1417 01:12:38,250 --> 01:12:42,160 with our -- with our dicks. 1418 01:12:42,160 --> 01:12:43,320 -Really? 1419 01:12:43,330 --> 01:12:46,490 -Sure. 1420 01:12:46,500 --> 01:12:48,230 -All right. 1421 01:12:48,230 --> 01:12:49,230 All right. 1422 01:12:49,230 --> 01:12:52,030 Well, me and my fuzz rod, 1423 01:12:52,030 --> 01:12:53,870 we're gonna... 1424 01:12:53,870 --> 01:12:58,240 go down to the cellar and...get some more wood. 1425 01:13:00,240 --> 01:13:02,380 All right. Good talk. 1426 01:13:11,250 --> 01:13:12,790 -What? 1427 01:13:12,790 --> 01:13:15,290 Who's been pillaging my veg stash?! 1428 01:13:17,530 --> 01:13:19,160 What am I gonna eat? 1429 01:13:36,380 --> 01:13:40,180 Aww. You're just hungry. That's cool. 1430 01:13:40,180 --> 01:13:43,050 What's mine is yours, rabbit friend. 1431 01:13:51,290 --> 01:13:52,930 No, I can't! I'm a vegetarian! 1432 01:13:52,930 --> 01:13:54,130 Meat upsets my stom-- 1433 01:13:59,070 --> 01:14:03,400 Oh, n-o-o-o-o! 1434 01:14:35,270 --> 01:14:37,300 -All right! 1435 01:14:44,310 --> 01:14:48,010 One bullet? Cool. 1436 01:14:49,450 --> 01:14:50,550 Oh! 1437 01:14:56,520 --> 01:14:58,460 I'm not afraid of you. 1438 01:15:13,980 --> 01:15:16,580 Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! 1439 01:15:16,580 --> 01:15:18,110 I'm a puppet! 1440 01:15:18,110 --> 01:15:20,010 Aah! 1441 01:15:20,020 --> 01:15:21,010 Oh, my God! 1442 01:15:21,020 --> 01:15:22,220 Ohh! Ohh! 1443 01:15:22,220 --> 01:15:24,920 I hate my little hairy baby dog dick! 1444 01:15:24,920 --> 01:15:27,120 I have a hairy dick! 1445 01:15:27,120 --> 01:15:29,160 Baby hairy dick! 1446 01:15:29,160 --> 01:15:32,460 I hate my little hairy baby dog dick! 1447 01:15:32,460 --> 01:15:34,930 I have a hairy dick! 1448 01:15:41,500 --> 01:15:43,240 You're so small! 1449 01:15:45,370 --> 01:15:47,070 -What was that? -Turbeaux's dead. 1450 01:15:47,080 --> 01:15:48,640 -And Sizzler? 1451 01:15:48,640 --> 01:15:50,940 -Honestly, I forgot who Sizzler was, 1452 01:15:50,950 --> 01:15:53,650 but I should play it cool. 1453 01:15:53,650 --> 01:15:55,920 Let's split up and look for him. 1454 01:16:00,150 --> 01:16:03,690 -Sizzler? 1455 01:16:07,530 --> 01:16:11,300 -Sizzler? 1456 01:16:14,470 --> 01:16:18,570 -Sizzler? 1457 01:16:18,570 --> 01:16:20,470 Sizzler? 1458 01:16:24,350 --> 01:16:25,450 -Sizzler? 1459 01:16:26,950 --> 01:16:29,220 -Sizzler? 1460 01:16:29,220 --> 01:16:31,720 Oh! Sizzler?! 1461 01:16:35,590 --> 01:16:37,160 -Sizzler? 1462 01:16:39,230 --> 01:16:41,490 Sizzler? 1463 01:16:41,500 --> 01:16:43,430 Sizzler? 1464 01:16:43,430 --> 01:16:46,430 -Relzzis? 1465 01:16:47,600 --> 01:16:49,740 -Relzzis? 1466 01:16:49,740 --> 01:16:52,110 -Sizzler? 1467 01:16:52,110 --> 01:16:54,040 -Relzzis? 1468 01:16:54,040 --> 01:16:55,540 Relzzis? 1469 01:16:55,540 --> 01:16:57,380 Sizzler? 1470 01:16:57,380 --> 01:16:58,410 Relzzis? 1471 01:16:58,750 --> 01:17:00,750 Relzzis? 1472 01:17:00,750 --> 01:17:03,050 -Sizzler? 1473 01:17:04,050 --> 01:17:05,990 -Sizzler? 1474 01:17:10,590 --> 01:17:13,330 Oh, my God! Oh, God! 1475 01:17:17,200 --> 01:17:19,100 -Whoa, Sizzler? 1476 01:17:20,100 --> 01:17:22,070 Shit. 1477 01:17:22,070 --> 01:17:25,440 Looks like it's just the two of us. 1478 01:17:25,440 --> 01:17:28,270 -No. 1479 01:17:28,280 --> 01:17:30,180 There's a third. 1480 01:17:34,350 --> 01:17:37,020 -T-O-Double-D? -Mm-hmm. 1481 01:17:38,020 --> 01:17:39,420 -It's the last Delta Bi. 1482 01:17:51,300 --> 01:17:53,800 -We have Steve Guttenberg here in the studio 1483 01:17:53,800 --> 01:17:55,440 to talk to us about his upcoming movie, 1484 01:17:55,440 --> 01:17:58,410 "3 Men and a Baby." -Can't wait! 1485 01:17:58,410 --> 01:17:59,770 See you after the late-night morning movie. 1486 01:17:59,780 --> 01:18:02,080 -Stay tuned! -Sizzler? 1487 01:18:03,350 --> 01:18:06,210 Oh, God! Todd Jr., no! 1488 01:18:06,210 --> 01:18:09,480 Fetus! 1489 01:18:09,480 --> 01:18:11,050 -I wish you'd be more positive. 1490 01:18:11,050 --> 01:18:13,050 -I've had a bad day. -Oh, no. 1491 01:18:13,060 --> 01:18:14,450 Motherface got you guys, too. 1492 01:18:14,460 --> 01:18:16,060 -Oh, you don't care. 1493 01:18:16,060 --> 01:18:17,760 You don't even know our names. 1494 01:18:17,760 --> 01:18:19,590 -Yea-- yeah, I do. 1495 01:18:19,590 --> 01:18:21,190 -Name us. 1496 01:18:21,200 --> 01:18:23,100 -Todd -- no. Turtleneck. 1497 01:18:23,100 --> 01:18:25,670 Turtleneck bro... 1498 01:18:25,670 --> 01:18:28,200 Flannel bro. 1499 01:18:28,200 --> 01:18:29,500 -Lucky guess. 1500 01:18:29,500 --> 01:18:31,640 Only 'cause we're named after our shirts. 1501 01:18:31,640 --> 01:18:34,540 Can you even name one good time we've had together? 1502 01:18:34,540 --> 01:18:36,440 -Yeah! 1503 01:18:40,210 --> 01:18:42,480 -No. 1504 01:18:46,560 --> 01:18:48,390 Aah! Ohh! 1505 01:18:48,390 --> 01:18:50,160 Ohh, ohh! 1506 01:18:52,130 --> 01:18:53,660 -You're alone, Brent. 1507 01:18:53,660 --> 01:18:55,330 You never avenged your brother. 1508 01:18:55,330 --> 01:18:57,160 You never solved your mystery. 1509 01:18:57,170 --> 01:18:59,300 -Oh, you're wrong. 1510 01:18:59,300 --> 01:19:04,740 I'm ready to avenge my brother because I solved my mystery. 1511 01:19:04,740 --> 01:19:08,140 I know who you are, Motherface. 1512 01:19:08,140 --> 01:19:10,410 You're Ronald Reagan. 1513 01:19:14,450 --> 01:19:15,520 -No -- no, I'm not. 1514 01:19:15,520 --> 01:19:17,350 -Think about it, Mr. President. 1515 01:19:17,350 --> 01:19:20,750 The Dude Bros freshman-year prank deposed General Cortez. 1516 01:19:20,760 --> 01:19:23,790 -Your heavy-metal hot-air balloon did drive General Cortez 1517 01:19:23,790 --> 01:19:25,260 from the Brazilian embassy. 1518 01:19:25,260 --> 01:19:27,630 -So you could install a puppet dictator 1519 01:19:27,630 --> 01:19:29,800 and turn the tide in Central America. 1520 01:19:29,800 --> 01:19:33,600 Oh, with their powerful pecs and extreme athleticism, 1521 01:19:33,600 --> 01:19:37,770 the Delta Bis were you personal Delta Force. 1522 01:19:40,670 --> 01:19:42,480 -This is ridiculous. -Sophomore year, 1523 01:19:42,480 --> 01:19:43,810 they sold arms to Iran, 1524 01:19:43,810 --> 01:19:46,550 but that went south, didn't it, Ronnie? 1525 01:19:46,550 --> 01:19:49,680 So you decommissioned them to a frat house in East Chico. 1526 01:19:49,680 --> 01:19:51,380 How convenient. 1527 01:19:51,390 --> 01:19:53,690 Oh, except you forgot about one thing. 1528 01:19:53,690 --> 01:19:56,260 You can't turn off training like that, can you? 1529 01:19:56,260 --> 01:19:58,260 No. Not like a light switch. 1530 01:19:58,260 --> 01:20:00,260 -Part of me did die that day. 1531 01:20:00,260 --> 01:20:03,300 -So, two days ago, when they brought down two planes, 1532 01:20:03,300 --> 01:20:06,670 you got a sex change, you appointed an imposter 1533 01:20:06,670 --> 01:20:08,600 to take your place in D.C., 1534 01:20:08,600 --> 01:20:13,440 and donned the face of Chico's most notorious killer. 1535 01:20:13,440 --> 01:20:16,310 Admit it, Motherface. 1536 01:20:16,310 --> 01:20:20,410 You are our nation's 40th president. 1537 01:20:24,420 --> 01:20:25,950 -Damn it, Brent. 1538 01:20:25,950 --> 01:20:28,220 How did you know? 1539 01:20:28,220 --> 01:20:29,960 -I solved it! 1540 01:20:33,560 --> 01:20:35,260 Oh, damn it! 1541 01:20:35,260 --> 01:20:37,430 I really thought I had that one! 1542 01:20:37,430 --> 01:20:39,400 Oh! 1543 01:20:39,400 --> 01:20:41,770 I'm ready to avenge my brother, Motherface, 1544 01:20:41,770 --> 01:20:43,570 because I know who you are. 1545 01:20:43,570 --> 01:20:45,470 -Did you know about his worst fear? 1546 01:20:45,470 --> 01:20:47,210 -Running out of beer? 1547 01:20:47,210 --> 01:20:49,610 -You knew all kinds of personal information about us. 1548 01:20:49,610 --> 01:20:51,440 -No babies! My seed! 1549 01:20:51,450 --> 01:20:52,550 Aaah! 1550 01:20:52,550 --> 01:20:53,910 -My fear is beef! 1551 01:20:53,920 --> 01:20:56,950 And pork and chicken and all that gross stuff! 1552 01:20:56,950 --> 01:20:59,490 -I told you -- I hate handyman work. 1553 01:20:59,490 --> 01:21:00,890 Aaah! 1554 01:21:00,890 --> 01:21:02,620 -Z.Q.'s overcome his fear of heights! 1555 01:21:02,620 --> 01:21:03,590 -Wow! -We never established 1556 01:21:03,590 --> 01:21:04,960 he was afraid of heights. 1557 01:21:04,960 --> 01:21:06,430 -Eh, who cares? This whole thing's a mess. 1558 01:21:06,430 --> 01:21:08,430 -This is fucking stupid. -Guys... 1559 01:21:08,430 --> 01:21:11,660 And that's because you're Turbeaux -- 1560 01:21:11,670 --> 01:21:13,470 the school therapist! 1561 01:21:13,470 --> 01:21:14,800 Ow! Why?! 1562 01:21:14,800 --> 01:21:16,600 -Why? 1563 01:21:16,610 --> 01:21:19,610 Haven't you been investigating any of this shit?! 1564 01:21:19,610 --> 01:21:23,680 Your brother murdered my mom and my twin sister! 1565 01:21:24,280 --> 01:21:27,810 I swore that the reign of terror of your kind was over. 1566 01:21:27,820 --> 01:21:29,280 I swore that I would find 1567 01:21:29,280 --> 01:21:31,650 the Delta Bis deepest, darkest fears, 1568 01:21:31,650 --> 01:21:33,520 starting with your brothers, 1569 01:21:33,520 --> 01:21:35,520 and use it to slaughter them! 1570 01:21:35,520 --> 01:21:39,660 -Hey, my brother was -- -Oh, shut the fuck up. 1571 01:21:39,660 --> 01:21:41,560 I was their therapist! 1572 01:21:41,560 --> 01:21:44,400 Oh, the things these guys told me. 1573 01:21:44,400 --> 01:21:46,300 Did you know that, two months ago, 1574 01:21:46,300 --> 01:21:48,430 Derek hit a 9-year-old with his car 1575 01:21:48,440 --> 01:21:51,400 and then buried her under the football field, huh? 1576 01:21:51,410 --> 01:21:55,640 And Samzy put Coca-Cola and Pop Rocks in the fuselage 1577 01:21:55,640 --> 01:21:58,340 of the Challenger shuttle as a goof! 1578 01:21:58,350 --> 01:22:01,980 -Hey, what about patient-doctor confidentiality? 1579 01:22:01,980 --> 01:22:04,520 -Oh, the sense of entitlement on these bros! 1580 01:22:04,520 --> 01:22:06,920 -Tai chi! 1581 01:22:08,420 --> 01:22:10,720 -Why did you join their ranks, Brent? 1582 01:22:10,730 --> 01:22:14,730 You could've ended this cycle of meaningless destruction. 1583 01:22:14,730 --> 01:22:17,300 -I just wanted to have the feeling of... 1584 01:22:17,300 --> 01:22:19,430 brotherhood again. 1585 01:22:19,430 --> 01:22:21,800 I...I had a good time. 1586 01:22:21,800 --> 01:22:24,440 -Oh, fuck you! 1587 01:22:24,440 --> 01:22:26,010 What about sisterhood?! 1588 01:22:26,010 --> 01:22:28,040 My sister was my best friend. 1589 01:22:28,040 --> 01:22:31,510 None of you motherfuckers have any sense of goddamn empathy. 1590 01:22:31,510 --> 01:22:34,510 They crashed a plane into an orphanage. 1591 01:22:34,520 --> 01:22:36,450 An orphanage! 1592 01:22:37,890 --> 01:22:40,850 -Well, I was behind the planes, not them. 1593 01:22:41,990 --> 01:22:43,960 -You are just like Brock. 1594 01:22:46,830 --> 01:22:48,060 Do you know why your brother 1595 01:22:48,060 --> 01:22:50,660 went to a different college than you? 1596 01:22:50,670 --> 01:22:52,530 -East Chico U. has an urban-development major. 1597 01:22:52,530 --> 01:22:54,530 He wanted to be a city planner. 1598 01:22:54,540 --> 01:22:57,400 -He told me he needed space. 1599 01:22:58,510 --> 01:23:05,610 -N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o! 1600 01:23:05,610 --> 01:23:08,510 -Not so motherfucking fast, Motherface! 1601 01:23:09,750 --> 01:23:12,450 -Nedry?! -That's fucking right, bitch! 1602 01:23:12,450 --> 01:23:15,090 -You're doing it, Nedry! You're swearing! 1603 01:23:15,090 --> 01:23:16,620 -Looks like I fucking 1604 01:23:16,620 --> 01:23:18,790 handicapped your advantage, Motherface. 1605 01:23:18,790 --> 01:23:21,430 See, I've gained mastery over all these animals! 1606 01:23:21,430 --> 01:23:22,800 Look at my beasts! 1607 01:23:22,800 --> 01:23:24,960 I've forgiven the wolves that slayed my family 1608 01:23:24,970 --> 01:23:26,500 and become their leader. 1609 01:23:26,500 --> 01:23:28,400 You want to see some cold-ass shit? 1610 01:23:28,400 --> 01:23:30,000 Ca-caw! 1611 01:23:33,370 --> 01:23:35,380 This here is a motherfucking bald eagle, 1612 01:23:35,380 --> 01:23:36,980 the most majestic creature in America, 1613 01:23:36,980 --> 01:23:39,680 and I made him my bitch! 1614 01:23:39,680 --> 01:23:42,650 And it's about to motherfuck your face, Motherface! 1615 01:23:42,650 --> 01:23:46,020 Because you know, birds of a feather, flock -- 1616 01:23:46,020 --> 01:23:48,150 together. 1617 01:24:00,730 --> 01:24:02,840 -Whoa! 1618 01:24:02,840 --> 01:24:03,970 Tai ch-- 1619 01:24:06,880 --> 01:24:08,470 -What's the matter? 1620 01:24:08,480 --> 01:24:09,880 All choked up? 1621 01:24:25,830 --> 01:24:28,530 Use her inertia against her. 1622 01:24:34,840 --> 01:24:36,570 -Is it really you? 1623 01:24:36,570 --> 01:24:38,000 -It's really me. 1624 01:24:38,010 --> 01:24:39,770 It's Brock. 1625 01:24:39,770 --> 01:24:41,010 -Weird. 1626 01:24:41,010 --> 01:24:43,840 I...thought you needed space. 1627 01:24:43,850 --> 01:24:47,050 -Hey. We've had our space. 1628 01:24:47,050 --> 01:24:48,950 And we'll never need space again, 1629 01:24:48,950 --> 01:24:51,750 because I'll always be with you... 1630 01:24:51,750 --> 01:24:54,220 within you. 1631 01:24:54,220 --> 01:24:56,490 Yeah. You'll see. 1632 01:25:00,760 --> 01:25:03,460 Oh, crumbles! 1633 01:25:04,800 --> 01:25:07,530 Virgin sacrifice. Oh! 1634 01:25:11,740 --> 01:25:14,870 Oh, if only I was a roly-poly bag of oranges! 1635 01:25:14,880 --> 01:25:16,610 I'd bop myself on the nose 1636 01:25:16,610 --> 01:25:19,750 and tumble and fumble right out of this tender trap. 1637 01:25:19,750 --> 01:25:21,150 -Sminkle, it's me. 1638 01:25:21,150 --> 01:25:24,020 Let's get you out of here. 1639 01:25:24,020 --> 01:25:27,490 -You lied to me. 1640 01:25:27,490 --> 01:25:29,890 You all lied to me. 1641 01:25:29,890 --> 01:25:33,030 And the Dude Bros aren't really bags of oranges, are they? 1642 01:25:33,030 --> 01:25:35,130 And every moment we spent in my bang bus 1643 01:25:35,130 --> 01:25:37,200 meant nothing, did it. 1644 01:25:37,200 --> 01:25:38,900 Well, fine, Candace. 1645 01:25:38,900 --> 01:25:40,700 If dying a virgin is the only way 1646 01:25:40,700 --> 01:25:42,900 I can save my beloved Chico, 1647 01:25:42,900 --> 01:25:45,910 then I guess that's all I'm good for. 1648 01:25:48,040 --> 01:25:50,180 -Not if I can help it. 1649 01:25:50,180 --> 01:25:52,040 -What are you doing? 1650 01:25:52,050 --> 01:25:53,780 -Saving your life. 1651 01:25:55,820 --> 01:25:58,750 -She's too powerful, Brock. I let you down. 1652 01:25:58,750 --> 01:26:01,290 -Hey, remember what I always say -- 1653 01:26:01,290 --> 01:26:04,260 if you face a foe you're afraid you can't defeat, 1654 01:26:04,260 --> 01:26:06,130 you got to let your bros in. 1655 01:26:06,130 --> 01:26:07,230 Let us in, Brent. 1656 01:26:07,230 --> 01:26:09,800 Let us all...in. 1657 01:26:14,970 --> 01:26:19,940 All along, Brent, you just needed to let you bros in. 1658 01:26:22,940 --> 01:26:24,540 -I'm ready. 1659 01:26:26,980 --> 01:26:31,580 Bros, enter me! 1660 01:26:31,590 --> 01:26:33,120 Oh! 1661 01:26:34,050 --> 01:26:36,090 Oh! 1662 01:26:36,090 --> 01:26:37,220 Oh-ho-ho! 1663 01:26:37,620 --> 01:26:39,930 Unh! -You're doing it. 1664 01:26:47,730 --> 01:26:49,140 -Oh! 1665 01:26:49,140 --> 01:26:50,800 Oh-ho-ho! 1666 01:26:50,810 --> 01:26:53,040 Unh! 1667 01:26:53,040 --> 01:26:54,610 Oh! 1668 01:26:54,610 --> 01:26:57,240 -Whoa! We're not virgin anymore. 1669 01:26:57,250 --> 01:27:00,710 I feel so free! 1670 01:27:00,720 --> 01:27:01,350 -Ah! 1671 01:27:01,350 --> 01:27:02,880 Oh! 1672 01:27:35,850 --> 01:27:39,390 -I'll always be with you, Brent.... 1673 01:27:39,390 --> 01:27:44,290 inside your butt giving you powers. 1674 01:27:44,290 --> 01:27:46,190 -Bye-bye. 1675 01:27:58,210 --> 01:28:02,170 -And that's the number 1 reason why Candace and I are in love. 1676 01:28:02,180 --> 01:28:03,910 -You fool! 1677 01:28:03,910 --> 01:28:07,280 You had one simple destiny, Sminkle -- 1678 01:28:07,280 --> 01:28:08,710 to stop the Dude Bros, 1679 01:28:08,720 --> 01:28:10,420 and you balls'd it up! 1680 01:28:10,420 --> 01:28:12,750 Do you have any idea 1681 01:28:12,750 --> 01:28:17,420 how much work and taxpayer money went into this?! 1682 01:28:17,430 --> 01:28:19,830 I learned Latin. 1683 01:28:19,830 --> 01:28:21,930 And making all those blood candles? 1684 01:28:21,930 --> 01:28:25,730 Jesus, I -- I killed so many ducks. 1685 01:28:25,730 --> 01:28:30,770 And Debra... made a lovely cake. 1686 01:28:30,770 --> 01:28:34,770 I ate a goddamn nicoise salad 1687 01:28:34,780 --> 01:28:37,380 to make room for this cocksucker, 1688 01:28:37,380 --> 01:28:39,810 and now I can't even look at it! 1689 01:28:41,980 --> 01:28:45,020 And you -- you said I could trust you! 1690 01:28:45,020 --> 01:28:47,450 And you fall in love with him?! 1691 01:28:47,460 --> 01:28:49,120 -Chief, you got a call 1692 01:28:49,120 --> 01:28:53,390 from the Imperial Dark Majesty on line 1. 1693 01:28:53,390 --> 01:28:59,300 -That's, uh -- that's Eric, and I have to take this. 1694 01:29:04,840 --> 01:29:06,370 -Well, we did it, Candy! 1695 01:29:06,370 --> 01:29:08,870 And all because you taught me to believe in myself. 1696 01:29:08,880 --> 01:29:10,780 -Well, I don't want to take all the credit. 1697 01:29:10,780 --> 01:29:13,880 I mean, you did teach me a thing or two, as well. 1698 01:29:13,880 --> 01:29:16,380 -Hey, I got a silly, crazy, little old idea. 1699 01:29:16,380 --> 01:29:18,250 What say you and me become a boyfriend-girlfriend 1700 01:29:18,250 --> 01:29:21,890 mystery-solving team, banging kids on the side? 1701 01:29:21,890 --> 01:29:24,390 I already know what our first case will be -- 1702 01:29:24,390 --> 01:29:27,730 the Chico County Orange Crisis. 1703 01:29:27,730 --> 01:29:31,200 -About that, I already cracked the case. 1704 01:29:31,200 --> 01:29:35,230 -Wow. That was fucking fast. 1705 01:29:35,240 --> 01:29:39,000 Where are your clues, partner? 1706 01:29:39,010 --> 01:29:41,240 -I'm a bag of oranges. 1707 01:29:47,050 --> 01:29:48,150 -What? 1708 01:29:48,150 --> 01:29:52,020 -I'm a bag of oranges. 1709 01:29:52,020 --> 01:29:54,150 -That's not a clue. That's not a clue. 1710 01:29:54,160 --> 01:29:55,290 -Search your feelings. 1711 01:29:55,290 --> 01:29:58,160 You know it to be true. 1712 01:29:58,160 --> 01:30:01,260 -Bag of oranges, get in here! 1713 01:30:01,260 --> 01:30:03,960 -Top 10 reasons magic isn't real. 1714 01:30:03,970 --> 01:30:06,170 Number 10, I have prayed to a genie 1715 01:30:06,170 --> 01:30:08,200 to take me away from my abusive home life, 1716 01:30:08,200 --> 01:30:10,100 and it never showed up. 1717 01:30:10,100 --> 01:30:12,140 Candace, please, no! 1718 01:30:12,140 --> 01:30:15,880 Ew! Oh, gosh! 1719 01:30:15,880 --> 01:30:17,380 But I love you! 1720 01:30:17,380 --> 01:30:19,350 -If you love me, you know what you have to do. 1721 01:30:19,350 --> 01:30:21,910 -I do. 1722 01:30:21,920 --> 01:30:25,020 -Look, he's talking to that bag of oranges again. 1723 01:30:25,020 --> 01:30:27,020 -Do it. Save Chico. 1724 01:30:29,460 --> 01:30:31,090 -I will always... 1725 01:30:31,090 --> 01:30:32,830 love you. 1726 01:30:38,500 --> 01:30:41,230 N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o! 1727 01:30:41,240 --> 01:30:43,000 -I don't want to call things too early, 1728 01:30:43,000 --> 01:30:44,400 but up here in the sky, 1729 01:30:44,410 --> 01:30:46,170 it looks like Chico's orange crisis 1730 01:30:46,170 --> 01:30:47,840 might be solved. 1731 01:33:19,390 --> 01:33:21,360 -Whoo! 1732 01:41:44,060 --> 01:41:45,700 -Hi, my baby! 1733 01:41:45,700 --> 01:41:47,930 -Sizzler?! -My baby! 1734 01:41:47,940 --> 01:41:50,470 -Sizzler? 110792

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