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>> Announcer: TONIGHT JOIN
JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS ‐
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SHAQUILLE O'NEAL, JOHN LITHGOW,
MUSICAL GUEST OZUNA AND THE
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00:00:12,973 --> 00:00:18,646
LEGENDARY ROOTS CREW
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00:00:18,646 --> 00:00:23,117
IT IS "THE TONIGHT SHOW" AT
HOME EDITION
AND NOW HERE IS JIMMY.
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00:00:23,117 --> 00:00:28,522
WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW."
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING
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IT IS THURSDAY WHICH BASICALLY
MEANS IT'S FRIDAY, REALLY.
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00:00:30,257 --> 00:00:32,226
RIGHT?
SO, WE MADE IT THROUGH ANOTHER
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WEEK
I'M SO HAPPY TO ANYONE THAT IS
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HOME AND STAYING SAFE AND
WEARING THE MASKS AND TO ANYONE
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00:00:36,397 --> 00:00:43,470
WHO IS SUFFERING WITH THIS
AWFUL PANDEMIC
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00:00:43,470 --> 00:00:46,774
I WISH YOU A SPEEDY, SPEEDY
RECOVERY
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00:00:46,774 --> 00:00:48,209
I AM GOING TO TRY TO MAKE YOU
LAUGH RIGHT NOW.
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00:00:48,209 --> 00:00:52,012
HERE ARE SOME JOKES.
LET'S GET TO SOME NEWS, GUYS
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AS THE CORONAVIRUS CONTINUES TO
SPREAD ACROSS THE COUNTRY, A
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00:00:55,849 --> 00:00:59,787
A NEW POLL FINDS THAT IF CASES
KEEP SPIKING, 65% OF AMERICANS
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00:00:59,787 --> 00:01:01,989
SUPPORT RETURNING TO LOCKDOWN.
FIRST OFF, WHAT DO YOU MEAN
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00:01:01,989 --> 00:01:10,231
RETURNING TO LOCKDOWN?
I HAVEN'T LEFT
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MY HAIR LOOKS LIKE A WIG
WHAT
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YOU KNOW YOUR COUNTRY IS DOING
WELL WHEN SHUTTING EVERYTHING
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DOWN IS POLLING HIGHER THAN
BOTH PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES
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PEOPLE SUPPORT ANOTHER LOCKDOWN
ESPECIALLY AFTER THEY GOT
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35 SAVE THE DATES FOR ALL THE
WEDDINGS THAT GOT MOVED.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
LOCKDOWN
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I'M HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS
76% OF AMERICANS
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OVER 55 SUPPORT RETURNING TO
LOCKDOWN
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00:01:37,458 --> 00:01:38,692
THEY SAID THEY FINALLY FIGURED
OUT HOW TO USE NETFLIX AND THEY
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ARE NOT STOPPING NOW
DON'T MAKE ME LEAVE, REALLY?
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BY THE WAY, MY DAD'S WATCHED
EVERYTHING
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I THINK HE THINKS THE ONE
SCREEN IS EVERYTHING ON
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NETFLIX.
SO, I'M LIKE, GREAT.
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SO HE DOES THAT.
HE'S DONE TV'S MOVIES.
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I HAVE NOT EVEN TOLD HIM WHAT
SEARCH DOES.
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>> DON'T
>> Jimmy: HE'S HAPPY
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THAT'S RIGHT
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THE CORONAVIRUS IS AFFECTING
EVERYONE, EVEN THOSE CLOSE TO
THE PRESIDENT.
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>> DOZENS OF SECRET SERVICE
AGENTS ARE BEING TOLD TO
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QUARANTINE AFTER WORKING AT
PRESIDENT TRUMP'S RALLY IN
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TULSA, OKLAHOMA WHERE A HUGE
SWATH OF PEOPLE DID NOT WEAR
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MASKS.
>> Jimmy: SERIOUSLY, YOU KNOW
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WE ARE IN CRAZY TIMES WHEN THE
SECRET SERVICE NEEDS PROTECTION
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FROM THE PRESIDENT
IF YOU ARE WORRIED ABOUT
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TRUMP'S SAFETY, DON'T.
HE'S FINE.
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WHILE THE AGENTS ARE
QUARANTINED, TRUMP WILL BE
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GUARDED BY ERIC AND DON JR.
USING A PAIR OF SPONGEBOB
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WALKIE‐TALKIES
"CAN YOU HEAR ME?"
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"YEAH.
"I AM RIGHT NEXT TO YOU.
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"OKAY.
WELL, A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE
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BLAMING THE TRUMP
ADMINISTRATION FOR MISHANDLING
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THE VIRUS.
BUT NOT EVERYTHING HAS GONE
WRONG, RIGHT
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>> A STARTLING NEW REPORT OUT
TODAY THAT MORE THAN 1 MILLION
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DEAD AMERICANS GOT THOSE
PANDEMIC STIMULUS CHECKS
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TOTALING $1.4 BILLION.
>> Jimmy: I PAY DEAD PEOPLE.
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EVEN DEAD PEOPLE WERE LIKE
ONLY $1,200 FOR THREE MONTHS
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THANKS, I GUESS.
THAT IS A TOUGH GAFF FOR TRUMP
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IN WHAT OTHERWISE HAS BEEN A
A FLAWLESS YEAR.
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WOULDN'T YOU AGREE
YEP, 1 MILLION DEAD PEOPLE
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RECEIVE CHECKS
EVEN PEOPLE INVESTING IN QUIBI
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THINK THAT IS A WASTE OF MONEY
TRUMP WAS LIKE, "IT WILL ALL BE
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00:03:22,663 --> 00:03:27,167
WORTH IT WHEN THEY HEAD TO THE
POLLS IN NOVEMBER.
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ACTUALLY TRUMP IS FURIOUS ABOUT
THE MISTAKE AND ASKED THAT ALL
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THE DEAD PEOPLE IMMEDIATELY
SEND THEIR CHECKS BACK
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AS IF THINGS WERE NOT BAD
ENOUGH, I HEARD THAT A BUNCH OF
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HAND SANITIZER WAS RECALLED FOR
CONTAINING LETHAL TOXINS
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THAT IS INSANE
I HAVE BEEN USING SO MUCH HAND
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SANITIZER THESE DAYS
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ANYWAYS, ONE OF THESE COMPANIES
JUST PUT OUT A NEW AD.
CHECK IT OUT
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♪
>> FOR YEARS, CLEANSE YOUR
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HANDS SANITIZER HAS BEEN ONE OF
THE MOST TRUSTED NAMES IN
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CLEAN.
AND NOW WITH THE CORONAVIRUS
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PANDEMIC, HAND SANITIZER IS
MORE IMPORTANT THAN EVER
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BUT MAYBE YOU HEARD THAT OUR
PRODUCT CONTAINS TOXIC
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METHANOL
WHOOPS
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YEAH, THAT IS ON US.
LUCKILY YOU CAN CONTINUE TO USE
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OUR HAND SANITIZER WORRY FREE.
WITH OUR NEW CLEANSIER HAND
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SANITIZER SANITIZER.
OUR HAND SANITIZER SANITIZER IS
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THE FIRSTHAND SANITIZER THAT
SANITIZES YOUR HAND SANITIZED
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HANDS TO KEEP THEM HAND
SANITIZER FREE
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SIMPLY USE OUR HAND SANITIZER
AS NORMAL, KEEPING IN MIND THAT
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EXPOSURE TO METHANOL CAN LEAD
TO NAUSEA, VOMITED, BLURRED
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00:04:22,256 --> 00:04:23,457
VISION OR DEATH, THEN WASH AWAY
THE HAND SANITIZER WITH OUR
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SANITIZER SANITIZER BEFORE YOUR
NERVOUS SYSTEM TOTALLY SHUTS
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DOWN
HA‐HA.
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SO EASY.
IT WILL ALMOST BE LIKE WE
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DIDN'T TRY TO KILL YOU WITH
SOMETHING THAT'S SUPPOSED TO
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KEEP YOU SAFE.
WHEN YOU ARE DONE JUST THROW
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BOTH BOTTLES INTO A HAZARDOUS
WASTE CONTAINER, BURN IT AND
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THEN THROW THE ASHES IN THE
OCEAN.
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TA‐DA!
CLEANSIER HAND SANITIZER
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SANITIZER KEEPS SANITIZING
UNTIL ALL THE SANITIZER IS
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00:04:45,979 --> 00:04:52,753
SANITIZED.
>> Jimmy: JUST ORDERED IT ON
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AMAZON
[ CLEARS THROAT
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WELL, THIS IS GOING VIRAL DOWN
IN PALM BEACH, FLORIDA
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THEY HELD A TOWN HALL TO TALK
ABOUT A NEW MASK MANDATE
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A LOT OF PEOPLE SHOWED UP TO
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SPEAK AGAINST IT AND WHAT THEY
SAID WAS PRETTY ‐‐ WELL, JUST
WATCH.
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00:05:06,166 --> 00:05:09,603
SOMEBODY TO WEAR A MASK KNOWING
THAT THAT MASK IS KILLING
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PEOPLE
EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU THAT
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00:05:12,773 --> 00:05:18,045
ARE OBEYING THE DEVIL'S LAWS
ARE GOING TO BE ARRESTED
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00:05:18,045 --> 00:05:20,881
>> KEEP TAKING THE ROAD OF
LEAST RESISTANCE
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KEEP LISTENING TO THE TV
BRAINWASHING YOU FROM BIRTH.
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>> AND THEY WANT TO THROW GOD'S
WONDERFUL BREATHING SYSTEM OUT
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THE DOOR
YOU ARE ALL TURNING YOUR BACKS
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ON IT.
>> DOCTOR, I REALLY HAVE MANY
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QUESTION MARKS ABOUT YOUR
DEGREES AND WHAT YOU REALLY
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KNOW
AND I WOULD ASK SUGGESTIVELY
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THAT YOU GO BACK TO SCHOOL AND
GET EDUCATED
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>> Jimmy: IF YOU THINK THAT IS
UPSETTING, TRUMP JUST PUT THEM
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IN CHARGE OF THE CORONAVIRUS
TASK FORCE
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SO
THAT'S RIGHT
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NOT ONLY IS THE CLIP VIRAL BUT
SO ARE THE PEOPLE.
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00:05:54,548 --> 00:05:55,582
THAT WAS LIKE A DRAMATIC
READING OF YOUR UNCLE'S
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00:05:55,582 --> 00:06:03,991
FACEBOOK POSTS
[ LAUGHTER ]
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00:06:03,991 --> 00:06:08,195
THIS ONE I LIKE.
THIS IS THE ONE.
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00:06:08,195 --> 00:06:11,031
FINALLY, CITY OFFICIALS WERE
LIKE, ARE YOU HEAR FOR BATH
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00:06:11,031 --> 00:06:14,101
SALTS ANONYMOUS?
BECAUSE THAT IS DOWN THE HALL.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
BATH SALTS ANONYMOUS, COME ON.
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THAT'S NOT A REAL THING.
IF YOU WANT TO MEET THESE
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00:06:23,510 --> 00:06:24,745
PEOPLE IN PERSON I SHOULD ADD
THEY WILL BE SIGNING AUTOGRAPHS
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AT A RECENTLY PULLED DOWN
5G TOWER
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AFTERWARD, FLORIDA OFFICIALS WE
LIKE, THAT WAS ACTUALLY ONE OF
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00:06:35,956 --> 00:06:42,429
OUR BETTER MEETINGS, DON'T YOU
THINK?
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00:06:42,429 --> 00:06:43,597
WELL, IT HAS BEEN A FEW DAYS
SINCE NEW YORK STARTED PHASE 2
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OF REOPENING, AND PEOPLE ARE
EXCITED THAT OUTDOOR DINING IS
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00:06:44,765 --> 00:06:50,604
ALLOWED.
YEAH
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00:06:50,604 --> 00:06:51,738
STREETS AND SIDEWALKS ARE
FILLED WITH TABLES AND CHAIRS
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AND PEOPLE ARE ALREADY LEAVING
YELP REVIEWS ABOUT THEIR
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00:06:52,873 --> 00:06:56,743
EXPERIENCES.
TAKE A LOOK.
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00:06:56,743 --> 00:06:59,146
THIS ONE SAYS, THE BAKED
CHICKEN WAS VERY JUICY PROBABLY
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00:06:59,146 --> 00:07:02,316
BECAUSE SOMEONE'S WINDOW AIR
CONDITIONER WAS DRIPPING ON IT
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00:07:02,316 --> 00:07:03,417
THIS NEXT ONE SAYS, GREAT
SERVICE, BUT IT WAS HARD TO
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00:07:03,417 --> 00:07:07,654
HEAR THE SPECIALS OVER ALL OF
THE ILLEGAL FIREWORKS.
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00:07:07,654 --> 00:07:08,922
THIS ONE SAYS, IT'S ALWAYS BEEN
MY DREAM TO DINE AL FRESCO AT
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00:07:08,922 --> 00:07:16,964
THE PENN STATION HOOTERS
[ LAUGHTER ]
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AL FRESCO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
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00:07:21,001 --> 00:07:25,706
[ DING ]
THIS NEXT ONE SAYS, THERE WAS
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00:07:25,706 --> 00:07:27,074
A HAIR IN MY FOOD BUT IT WAS
MINE BECAUSE I HAVEN'T GOTTEN
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00:07:27,074 --> 00:07:33,780
A HAIRCUT SINCE FEBRUARY
THIS NEXT ONE SAYS, A VERY
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00:07:33,780 --> 00:07:35,082
SHORT WAIT BUT THE ONLY THING
ON THE MENU WAS LEFTOVER BANANA
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00:07:35,082 --> 00:07:40,454
BREAD.
I GET THAT
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00:07:40,454 --> 00:07:43,523
LASTLY, THIS ONE SAYS, RISKING
MY LIFE WAS SO WORTH TWO COORS
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00:07:43,523 --> 00:07:47,160
LIGHTS AND A PLATE OF JALAPENO
POPPERS.
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00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:47,794
AND FINALLY, GUYS, THERE IS
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00:07:47,794 --> 00:07:51,465
A LOT OF UNCERTAINTY ABOUT
SPORTS BUT THERE IS ONE EVENT
THAT IS COMING BACK.
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00:07:52,699 --> 00:07:53,934
>> THE 146th KENTUCKY DERBY
WILL BE HELD ON SEPTEMBER 5th
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00:07:53,934 --> 00:07:55,068
AND SPECTATORS WILL BE ALLOWED
ACCORDING TO THE CHURCHILL
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00:07:55,068 --> 00:08:00,574
DOWNS RACE TRACK
>> Jimmy: FOR FANS IT WILL BE
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00:08:00,574 --> 00:08:01,775
THE MOST EXCITING TWO MINUTES
IN SPORTS FOLLOWED BY THE MOST
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BORING TWO WEEKS IN QUARANTINE
IN THE MIDST OF THIS
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00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:08,849
CHALLENGING YEAR THOUGH, I
THINK IT WILL BE KIND OF FUN TO
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00:08:08,849 --> 00:08:11,885
WATCH A MAN IN A SEERSUCKER
SUIT THROW UP A MINT JULEP
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00:08:11,885 --> 00:08:16,590
DON'T YOU THINK?
ORGANIZERS SAY THOUGH THAT THEY
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00:08:16,590 --> 00:08:17,724
WILL TAKE EVERY SAFETY
PRECAUTION BEFORE STRAPPING AN
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00:08:17,724 --> 00:08:29,269
80‐POUND MAN TO A HORSE RUNNING
40 MILES PER HOUR. OKAY.
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00:08:29,269 --> 00:08:35,008
THAT DOESN'T SOUND ‐‐ I KNOW
IT IS NOT YOU, IS IT
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00:08:35,008 --> 00:08:41,081
LET THEM DO IT
HERE IS THE LAST ONE
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00:08:41,081 --> 00:08:42,716
THE GOOD NEWS IS THE HATS ARE
BIG ENOUGH THAT THEY
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00:08:42,716 --> 00:08:45,352
AUTOMATICALLY MAKE YOU SOCIAL
DISTANCE
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00:08:45,352 --> 00:08:47,320
THERE YOU GO
ALL RIGHT EVERYBODY.
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00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:49,623
THAT IS MY MONOLOGUE
WHAT A GREAT SHOW WE HAVE
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00:08:49,623 --> 00:08:50,757
TONIGHT.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL, ONE OF MY
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00:08:50,757 --> 00:08:53,026
FAVORITE GUESTS, IS ON THE
SHOW
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00:08:53,026 --> 00:08:54,194
REALLY WE HAVE KNOWN HIM SINCE
THE LATE 90s ‐‐ EVEN BEFORE
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THAT, HE'S ALWAYS BEEN A
A FRIEND
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00:08:57,264 --> 00:08:58,899
I LOVE THAT GUY.
ALSO, SPEAKING OF GREAT FRIENDS
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00:08:58,899 --> 00:09:01,968
AND GREAT GUESTS, JOHN LITHGOW
IS ON THE SHOW
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00:09:01,968 --> 00:09:04,271
AND I MIGHT INTRODUCE HIM TO MY
DOG, GARY, WHO HE'S PAINTED
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00:09:04,271 --> 00:09:07,874
A PICTURE FOR.
OF
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00:09:07,874 --> 00:09:12,245
I GUESS IT WAS FOR US.
IT WAS OF HER.
169
00:09:12,245 --> 00:09:14,214
AND WE ALSO HAVE GREAT MUSIC
FROM OZUNA
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00:09:14,214 --> 00:09:19,019
OZUNA!
I LOVE OZUNA
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00:09:19,019 --> 00:09:21,655
AND MAYBE A LITTLE FUN GAME
WITH DEMI LOVATO
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00:09:21,655 --> 00:09:23,857
THAT'S WHAT I AM SAYING.
I DON'T KNOW
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00:09:23,857 --> 00:09:25,525
VERY, VERY EXCITING SHOW
VERY, VERY [ DING ] EXCITING
174
00:09:25,525 --> 00:09:28,628
SHOW
I DID NOT EVEN LET YOU KNOW
175
00:09:28,628 --> 00:09:31,031
THIS YET
I CAVED.
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00:09:31,031 --> 00:09:34,868
I CAVED.
AND I FINALLY JOINED TIKTOK.
177
00:09:34,868 --> 00:09:36,069
I JOINED TIKTOK AND I AM GOING
TO POST MY VERY FIRST TIKTOK
178
00:09:36,069 --> 00:09:38,371
VIDEO.
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00:09:38,371 --> 00:09:45,545
MY VERY FIRST "VIDYA."
HERE IT IS RIGHT HERE.
MY VERY FIRST TIKTOK
180
00:09:58,525 --> 00:10:25,886
♪
♪
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00:10:28,855 --> 00:10:34,895
♪
♪ >> Jimmy: IS THIS ‐‐ IS THIS
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00:10:34,895 --> 00:10:40,133
MY LIFE NOW?
POINTING AT LITTLE BOXES AND
183
00:10:40,133 --> 00:10:43,069
SAYING I AM BLUE DABA DEE DABA
DIE.
184
00:10:43,069 --> 00:10:46,373
I AM A 45‐YEAR‐OLD MAN
WHAT WAS I TRYING TO PROVE BY
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00:10:46,373 --> 00:10:50,177
JOINING TIKTOK
THAT I WAS COOL?
186
00:10:50,177 --> 00:10:53,480
HERE IS THE THING, JIMMY
YOU ARE COOL
187
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:55,882
YOU HAVE AN AMAZING WIFE
YOU HAVE TWO BEAUTIFUL
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00:10:55,882 --> 00:10:59,352
DAUGHTERS.
MOST IMPORTANTLY YOU HAVE
189
00:10:59,352 --> 00:11:01,440
A SLIDE IN YOUR HOUSE.
190
00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:08,715
MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP POINTING
TOWARDS CAPTIONS AND START
POINTING TOWARDS YOUR HEART.
191
00:11:28,043 --> 00:11:29,067
♪
>> Jimmy: WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK
192
00:11:29,067 --> 00:11:30,240
TO PLAY A VERY FUN GAME WITH
THE ONE AND ONLY DEMI LOVATO
193
00:11:50,947 --> 00:11:51,681
♪
>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK,
194
00:11:51,681 --> 00:11:53,340
EVERYBODY.
WE ARE ABOUT TO PLAY GOOGLE
195
00:11:53,340 --> 00:11:56,811
TRANSLATE SONGS WITH ONE OF OUR
FAVORITES.
196
00:11:56,811 --> 00:11:59,547
SHE HAS A NICE PART IN
"EUROVISION," WHICH IS ‐‐ TO
197
00:11:59,547 --> 00:12:00,181
WILL FERRELL AND RACHEL MCADAMS
198
00:12:00,181 --> 00:12:07,154
MOVIE ON NETFLIX TOMORROW,
JUNE 26th.
HERE IS THE GREAT DEMI LOVATO.
199
00:12:07,154 --> 00:12:11,258
I AM HERE WITH DEMI LOVATO
>> HELLO
200
00:12:11,258 --> 00:12:13,957
>> Jimmy: SO GOOD TO SEE YOU
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING
201
00:12:13,957 --> 00:12:16,860
BACK TO THE SHOW
DEMI, YOU ARE AN AMAZING SINGER
202
00:12:16,860 --> 00:12:21,765
AND YOU ARE APPEARING IN THE
NEW MOVIE, "EUROVISION."
203
00:12:21,765 --> 00:12:24,101
WHICH BY THE WAY, YOU ARE
UNBELIEVABLE IN.
204
00:12:24,101 --> 00:12:27,571
OH, MY GOSH.
>> THANK YOU
205
00:12:27,571 --> 00:12:31,008
>> Jimmy: I KNOW HOW FUN THAT
YOU ARE AND ALL OF THAT STUFF.
206
00:12:31,008 --> 00:12:34,778
AND ‐‐ BUT, MAN, OH, MAN
WITH WILL FERRELL, COME ON
207
00:12:34,778 --> 00:12:37,915
I THINK EVERYONE GETS FUNNIER.
BUT DUDE, HE WAS MY MOVE THAT I
208
00:12:37,915 --> 00:12:43,153
DON'T WANT TO SPOIL ANYTHING
>> THANK YOU
209
00:12:43,153 --> 00:12:45,355
>> Jimmy: IT WAS SO DUMB
IT IS SO DUMB, IT MADE ME LAUGH
210
00:12:45,355 --> 00:12:46,623
SO HARD LIKE SOMEONE TOLD YOU,
LIKE A COACH TOLD YOU THAT THAT
211
00:12:46,623 --> 00:12:53,764
WAS THE THING TO DO.
>> RIGHT
212
00:12:53,764 --> 00:12:55,532
>> Jimmy: YOU ARE UNBELIEVABLY
FUNNY.
213
00:12:55,532 --> 00:12:58,802
>> OH, THANK YOU SO MUCH
I HAD SO MUCH FUN SHOOTING IT.
214
00:12:58,802 --> 00:13:03,740
>> Jimmy: GOSH
WELL, ANYWAYS, OBVIOUSLY, WE
215
00:13:03,740 --> 00:13:05,075
HAVE SUNG ON THE SHOW BEFORE
I ALWAYS LOVED HEARING YOUR
216
00:13:05,075 --> 00:13:06,977
VOICE.
BUT I WANT TO DO A FUN GAME
217
00:13:06,977 --> 00:13:10,180
WITH YOU TONIGHT
AND I WANTED TO SING SOME SONGS
218
00:13:10,180 --> 00:13:12,149
WITH YOU
BUT HERE IS THE CATCH.
219
00:13:12,149 --> 00:13:16,086
TO MIX THINGS UP, WE FED THESE
SONGS INTO GOOGLE TRANSLATE.
220
00:13:16,086 --> 00:13:17,287
SO I HAVE A BUNCH OF RANDOM
SONGS, AND WE PUT THEM THROUGH
221
00:13:17,287 --> 00:13:18,489
GOOGLE TRANSLATE, SO WE ARE
GOING TO PERFORM JUMBLED LYRICS
222
00:13:18,489 --> 00:13:22,559
RIGHT NOW.
IT'S TIME FOR GOOGLE TRANSLATE
223
00:13:22,559 --> 00:13:28,232
SONGS.
♪
224
00:13:28,232 --> 00:13:29,967
SO IF YOU'VE EVER USED GOOGLE
TRANSLATE, YOU KNOW IT IS NOT
225
00:13:29,967 --> 00:13:32,469
ALWAYS PERFECT
FOR EXAMPLE, WHEN TRANSLATED TO
226
00:13:32,469 --> 00:13:33,637
RUSSIAN AND BACK, "THE TONIGHT
SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON,"
227
00:13:33,637 --> 00:13:39,710
BECOMES "STARRING SHOW WITH
JIMMY FALLON, STARRING."
228
00:13:39,710 --> 00:13:43,213
SO WE DID THE SAME THING WITH
SONG LYRICS.
229
00:13:43,213 --> 00:13:45,282
SOME PEOPLE HAVE DONE THIS
ONLINE, IT'S SUPER FUN. SO
230
00:13:45,282 --> 00:13:46,450
DEMI, IF YOU DON'T MIND, YOU
WILL GO FIRST AND YOU WILL BE
231
00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:47,518
SINGING THE GOOGLE TRANSLATE
VERSION OF "WALKING ON
232
00:13:47,518 --> 00:13:56,760
SUNSHINE," WHICH IS NOW CALLED,
"NOW MOM'S IN THE SUN NOW.
233
00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:58,962
YOU READY?
>> I'M READY
234
00:13:58,962 --> 00:14:00,497
>> Jimmy: LET'S START THE
MUSIC.
235
00:14:00,497 --> 00:14:07,037
♪
♪ THERE WAS A TIM
236
00:14:07,037 --> 00:14:14,044
THAT BEES LOVE
ME AND THOUGHT
237
00:14:14,044 --> 00:14:15,913
I COULD GRIND ♪
♪ AND I WILL NO
238
00:14:15,913 --> 00:14:18,949
WAIT FOR YOU T
HIT THE SU
239
00:14:18,949 --> 00:14:26,523
WITH A DOOR ♪
♪ I WILL CONGRATULATE YOU
240
00:14:26,523 --> 00:14:35,599
ON GRASPING E‐MAIL ♪
♪ I CANNOT WAIT
241
00:14:35,599 --> 00:14:40,404
TO WRITE ON YO
WHEN YOU FINALLY MOVE ♪
242
00:14:40,404 --> 00:14:44,908
♪ NOW MOM'S I
THE SUN NOW, WATER
243
00:14:44,908 --> 00:14:49,479
NOW MOM'S IN
THE SUN NOW, WATER ♪
244
00:14:49,479 --> 00:14:54,418
♪ NOW MOM'S I
THE SUN NOW, WATER
245
00:14:54,418 --> 00:15:02,159
THE QUALITY'S POOR ♪
>> Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH.
246
00:15:02,159 --> 00:15:04,795
THANK YOU FOR THAT
>> THAT WAS SO FUN
247
00:15:04,795 --> 00:15:06,196
YEAH, OF COURSE.
>> Jimmy: THAT WAS GREAT
248
00:15:06,196 --> 00:15:07,731
IT IS MY TURN.
AND I WILL BE PERFORMING THE
249
00:15:07,731 --> 00:15:08,765
GOOGLE TRANSLATED VERSION OF
"SOMEONE YOU LOVED" BY
250
00:15:08,765 --> 00:15:14,504
LEWIS CAPALDI, I LOVE THAT
SONG
251
00:15:14,504 --> 00:15:18,242
NOW IT IS CALLED "ALL MY
FAVORITE CARPETS."
252
00:15:18,242 --> 00:15:27,317
WHAT
♪
253
00:15:27,317 --> 00:15:31,922
♪ PLEASE COMMENT THAT
THIS IS TOO SIMILA
254
00:15:31,922 --> 00:15:35,759
I HOPE I GOT EXCITED ABOUT
HAVING MY OUCH ♪
255
00:15:35,759 --> 00:15:39,329
♪ I LOST HIS BLOO
DURING THE DUS
256
00:15:39,329 --> 00:15:43,700
PLEASE TRY TO MAKE I
INTO MY SECTION ♪
257
00:15:43,700 --> 00:15:48,639
♪ I HIT MY BUTLER
ROLLED UP MY CARPET ♪
258
00:15:48,639 --> 00:15:50,474
♪ I'LL LET YOU TAKE
A LOOK AT AL
259
00:15:50,474 --> 00:15:59,783
OF MY CARPETS ♪
>> OH, BRAVO
260
00:15:59,783 --> 00:16:02,219
BRAVO.
YES.
261
00:16:02,219 --> 00:16:03,854
>> Jimmy: I LOVE YOU
YOU ARE TOO NICE
262
00:16:03,854 --> 00:16:08,258
ALL RIGHT, IT IS YOUR TURN
AGAIN FOR THIS LAST ROUND.
263
00:16:08,258 --> 00:16:09,459
YOU WILL BE SINGING THE GOOGLE
TRANSLATE VERSION OF ONE OF
264
00:16:09,459 --> 00:16:13,563
YOUR OWN HITS WHICH I LOVE,
SORRY, NOT SORRY
265
00:16:13,563 --> 00:16:15,899
WHICH, WHEN TRANSLATED, IT IS
CALLED "APOLOGIZE TO MY
266
00:16:15,899 --> 00:16:27,344
INFANT."
WHENEVER YOU'RE READY.
267
00:16:27,344 --> 00:16:31,081
♪ NOW I LIED TO MY DO
AND MY CHILD IS THE WORS
268
00:16:31,081 --> 00:16:35,652
YOU'RE WATCHING THE SEX TIME
AND I DON'T WHERE IT IS ♪
269
00:16:35,652 --> 00:16:38,622
♪ AND I WOULD LIK
TO MAKE IT MOR
270
00:16:38,622 --> 00:16:42,025
AGREEABLE BUT NO ♪
♪ I WILL APOLOGIZ
271
00:16:42,025 --> 00:16:44,961
TO MY INFANT
I WILL APOLOGIZE
272
00:16:44,961 --> 00:16:48,465
TO MY INFANT ♪
♪ FEELING SIC
273
00:16:48,465 --> 00:16:51,735
WHEN YOU FEEL SICK
I KNEW THAT YOU'RE
274
00:16:51,735 --> 00:16:55,105
STANDING ON TOP OF ME ♪
♪ I WILL APOLOGIZ
275
00:16:55,105 --> 00:16:58,508
TO MY INFANT
I WILL APOLOGIZE
276
00:16:58,508 --> 00:17:02,346
TO MY INFANT ♪
♪ I WAS AFFECTED BY
277
00:17:02,346 --> 00:17:05,816
THE TWISTING OF BOARDS
I THINK IT'S HOT
278
00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:10,587
WHEN I'M ON FIRE ♪
>> Jimmy: YOU ARE HOT WHEN YOU
279
00:17:10,587 --> 00:17:12,422
ARE ON FIRE.
>> OH, THANK YOU. >> Jimmy:
280
00:17:12,422 --> 00:17:15,792
THAT WAS AWESOME
THANK YOU DEMI LOVATO.
281
00:17:15,792 --> 00:17:17,027
CHECK HER OUT IN THE NEW MOVIE
"EUROVISION SONG CONTEST: THE
282
00:17:17,027 --> 00:17:23,433
STORY OF FIRE SAGA" STREAMING
ON NETFLIX JUNE 26th
283
00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:25,402
YOU ARE THE BEST BUD
THANK YOU. >> YOU ARE THE BEST
284
00:17:25,402 --> 00:17:30,207
SEE YOU.
>> Jimmy: GOSH, I LOVE DEMI.
285
00:17:30,207 --> 00:17:31,308
WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL WHO I ALSO
286
00:17:31,308 --> 00:17:33,172
LOVE
COME ON BACK, EVERYBODY.
287
00:17:52,659 --> 00:17:55,369
♪
>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK
288
00:17:55,369 --> 00:17:57,271
EVERYBODY.
THIS NEXT GUY IS AN NBA LEGEND,
289
00:17:57,271 --> 00:17:58,439
OLYMPIC GOLD MEDAL WINNER, A
A HALL OF FAMER, ALL‐STAR AND
290
00:17:58,439 --> 00:18:08,115
JUST ALL AROUND GREAT, GREAT
HUMAN.
291
00:18:08,115 --> 00:18:09,984
HE'S DOING THIS THING THIS
SATURDAY
292
00:18:09,984 --> 00:18:12,720
ALL PROCEEDS GO TO GREAT
THINGS
293
00:18:12,720 --> 00:18:14,121
WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT THIS
IT'S CALLED "SHAQ'S FUN HOUSE
294
00:18:14,121 --> 00:18:17,091
VS. GRONK BEACH.
tHAT'S RIGHT, ROB GRONKOWSKI
295
00:18:17,091 --> 00:18:20,294
VS. SHAQ
IT'S AWESOME
296
00:18:20,294 --> 00:18:23,731
HERE'S MY CONVERSATION WITH
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL
297
00:18:23,731 --> 00:18:27,134
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL, I'M SO HAPPY
YOU'RE HERE AND ON MY SHOW
298
00:18:27,134 --> 00:18:28,869
I LOVE SEEING YOU, MAN
I WISH I COULD SEE YOU IN
299
00:18:28,869 --> 00:18:30,404
PERSON
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE ONE OF MY
300
00:18:30,404 --> 00:18:35,209
FAVORITE GUESTS.
♪
301
00:18:35,209 --> 00:19:00,334
♪
♪
♪
302
00:19:04,505 --> 00:19:07,575
>> Jimmy: I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
DOING.
303
00:19:07,575 --> 00:19:11,412
>> I KNOW YOU KNOW
[ LAUGHTER ]
304
00:19:11,412 --> 00:19:13,714
>> Jimmy: YOU GOT ME THOUGH.
YOU GOT ME
305
00:19:13,714 --> 00:19:15,349
YOU'RE PLAYING MUSIC FOR WHITE
PEOPLE
306
00:19:15,349 --> 00:19:21,021
>> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: GOD.
307
00:19:21,021 --> 00:19:22,323
HOOK, LINE AND SINKER, I FELL
FOR IT AND I STARTED TO DANCING
308
00:19:22,323 --> 00:19:24,291
TO EVERY SINGLE ‐‐
I KNEW EVERY WORD TO EVERY ONE
309
00:19:24,291 --> 00:19:28,596
OF THEM.
SO MAD, I WAS SO MAD YOU DID
310
00:19:28,596 --> 00:19:33,067
THAT
YOU GOT ME, MAN.
311
00:19:33,067 --> 00:19:37,771
[ LAUGHTER ]
ARE YOU READY FOR THIS
312
00:19:37,771 --> 00:19:41,475
>> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: Y'ALL READY FOR THIS
313
00:19:41,475 --> 00:19:43,544
THAT'S ANOTHER WHITE PERSON ONE
TOO, RIGHT
314
00:19:43,544 --> 00:19:46,447
>> NO.
OH YEAH, Y'ALL READY FOR THIS?
315
00:19:46,447 --> 00:19:54,355
♪
>> Jimmy: HERE'S WHAT WE SHOULD
316
00:19:54,355 --> 00:19:58,125
DO ONE DAY, READY FOR THIS
IT'S CALLED THE DJ SYNC.
317
00:19:58,125 --> 00:20:01,495
OKAY, NOW IT LOOKS LIKE I'M
DJING, BUT REALLY BEHIND THE
318
00:20:01,495 --> 00:20:03,430
CURTAIN YOU'RE LIKE "WIZARD OF
OZ" BEHIND THE CURTAIN
319
00:20:03,430 --> 00:20:05,065
YOU'RE THE ONE DJING FOR ALL OF
THESE PEOPLE
320
00:20:05,065 --> 00:20:06,834
>> LET'S DO IT
>> Jimmy: LIKE A "WIZARD OF OZ"
321
00:20:06,834 --> 00:20:08,569
FEST
YOU DON'T KNOW WHO ‐
322
00:20:08,569 --> 00:20:10,004
YOU THINK IT'S ME THE WHOLE
TIME
323
00:20:10,004 --> 00:20:11,839
I'M LIKE, "BY THE WAY, I DON'T
EVEN KNOW HOW TO DJ.
324
00:20:11,839 --> 00:20:14,041
IT'S SHAQ.
>> YEAH, LET'S DO IT
325
00:20:14,041 --> 00:20:16,110
I'M DOWN
>> Jimmy: LAST TIME I THINK I
326
00:20:16,110 --> 00:20:17,344
HAD YOU ON THE SHOW WAS JANUARY
AND THEN TWO AND A HALF MONTHS
327
00:20:17,344 --> 00:20:22,349
LATER, WOW
WHAT A DIFFERENT WORLD
328
00:20:22,349 --> 00:20:23,884
>> YEAH.
A DIFFERENT WORLD, YOU KNOW,
329
00:20:23,884 --> 00:20:26,620
THE COVID.
YOU KNOW, IF ANYONE'S FAMILY
330
00:20:26,620 --> 00:20:32,359
HAS BEEN AFFECTED BY COVID, I
WANT TO SEND OUT MY BEST WISHES
331
00:20:32,359 --> 00:20:36,397
TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY
YOU KNOW, THERE'S A LOT OF
332
00:20:36,397 --> 00:20:38,198
STUFF GOING ON AND ‐
YOU KNOW, HOPEFULLY IT ALL
333
00:20:38,198 --> 00:20:42,303
COMES BACK TO WHERE IT USED TO
BE
334
00:20:42,303 --> 00:20:44,038
IT WASN'T PERFECT, YOU KNOW.
THERE'S STILL A LOT OF SOCIAL
335
00:20:44,038 --> 00:20:46,974
INJUSTICES GOING ON.
BUT I THINK IF WE COULD JUST
336
00:20:46,974 --> 00:20:50,811
CONTINUE TO UNDERSTAND EACH
OTHER, AND JUST HAVE CERTAIN
337
00:20:50,811 --> 00:20:54,315
CONVERSATIONS, YOU KNOW, THE
WORLD WILL BE A BETTER PLACE
338
00:20:54,315 --> 00:20:56,817
>> Jimmy: HOW IS YOUR FAMILY,
IS EVERYONE OKAY AND SAFE?
339
00:20:56,817 --> 00:21:02,523
>> YEAH, MY FAMILY IS OKAY
YOU KNOW, CAN'T COMPLAIN
340
00:21:02,523 --> 00:21:03,624
MOM, BROTHER, SISTERS,
CHILDREN, FRIENDS, FAMILY,
341
00:21:03,624 --> 00:21:08,762
EVERYBODY IS FINE.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S GOOD.
342
00:21:08,762 --> 00:21:10,731
THAT'S GOOD.
EVERYONE'S MISSING SPORTS RIGHT
343
00:21:10,731 --> 00:21:14,101
NOW.
DO YOU MISS COMMENTING
344
00:21:14,101 --> 00:21:16,537
DO YOU MISS GETTING IN FIGHTS
WITH BARKLEY
345
00:21:16,537 --> 00:21:21,342
>> I DO.
I DO MISS SPORTS, YOU KNOW
346
00:21:21,342 --> 00:21:23,510
I SAID EARLIER, YOU KNOW, THE
GENERAL AND I, WE'RE DOING THAT
347
00:21:23,510 --> 00:21:24,712
PARTY BECAUSE WE KNOW THAT
THERE'S TWO THINGS THAT ALWAYS
348
00:21:24,712 --> 00:21:28,449
BRING PEOPLE TOGETHER NO MATTER
WHAT'S GOING ON.
349
00:21:28,449 --> 00:21:32,152
THAT'S SPORTS AND MUSIC.
AT A FESTIVAL, YOU CAN BE
350
00:21:32,152 --> 00:21:34,221
SITTING NEXT TO A GUY THAT'S A
A DIFFERENT COLOR, A DIFFERENT
351
00:21:34,221 --> 00:21:36,090
RACE, YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING
ABOUT HIM, BUT Y'ALL ARE
352
00:21:36,090 --> 00:21:38,192
JAMMING.
YOU'RE HAVING FUN.
353
00:21:38,192 --> 00:21:40,060
WHICH PROMPTS YOU TO GO, "HEY
BROTHER, HOW YOU DOING
354
00:21:40,060 --> 00:21:42,196
HEY SIR, HOW YOU DOING?"
NOW WE HAVE DIALOGUE
355
00:21:42,196 --> 00:21:44,064
NOW WE HAVE RESPECT.
NOW WE CAN, YOU KNOW, GET TO
356
00:21:44,064 --> 00:21:47,568
KNOW EACH OTHER.
AND SPORTS DOES THE SAME THING
357
00:21:47,568 --> 00:21:50,404
I DIDN'T, WHEN I ‐
I DIDN'T PROBABLY INTERACT WITH
358
00:21:50,404 --> 00:21:55,776
MY FIRST WHITE GUY UNTIL I WENT
TO GERMANY
359
00:21:55,776 --> 00:21:59,380
I'M FROM THE PROJECTS.
I WENT TO MILITARY SCHOOL.
360
00:21:59,380 --> 00:22:00,648
YOU KNOW, WE SEE THEM, BUT WE
DON'T EVER REALLY INTERACT WITH
361
00:22:00,648 --> 00:22:01,548
THEM
WHEN I STARTED TO PLAY SPORTS
362
00:22:01,548 --> 00:22:03,784
THEN I REALIZED THAT, HEY.
OKAY
363
00:22:03,784 --> 00:22:05,586
YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU'RE DIFFERENT, BUT WE HAVE
364
00:22:05,586 --> 00:22:08,489
THE SAME VIEWS ON THINGS
YOU KNOW I LIKE YOU.
365
00:22:08,489 --> 00:22:11,925
I RESPECT YOU.
YOU KNOW, I'M VERY SUCCESSFUL,
366
00:22:11,925 --> 00:22:15,562
BUT I DIDN'T DO IT ALL BY
MYSELF
367
00:22:15,562 --> 00:22:16,864
I'VE HAD A LOT OF TEAMMATES AND
WE ARE FORCED TO COME TOGETHER
368
00:22:16,864 --> 00:22:19,600
FOR THE COMMON CAUSE OF
WINNING.
369
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:20,834
AND IF AMERICA CAN USE THE
SPORTS MODEL, WE'RE FORCED TO
370
00:22:20,834 --> 00:22:22,002
BE TOGETHER, FORCED TO LIVE
TOGETHER FOR THE COMMON CAUSE
371
00:22:22,002 --> 00:22:29,243
OF PEACE, THE WORLD WOULD BE A
A BETTER PLACE
372
00:22:29,243 --> 00:22:30,878
SO ‐
>> Jimmy: WELL SAID.
373
00:22:30,878 --> 00:22:36,116
>> YEAH.
YOU KNOW, IT IS A GREAT THING.
374
00:22:36,116 --> 00:22:37,418
>> Jimmy: I HEARD THAT THEY ARE
MAKING ‐‐ OR THEY'RE WORKING ON
375
00:22:37,418 --> 00:22:42,990
A KOBE DOCUMENTARY THAT'S
SIMILAR TO "THE LAST DANCE."
376
00:22:42,990 --> 00:22:50,531
AND I KNOW THAT YOU OBVIOUSLY
KNEW HIM REALLY WELL
377
00:22:50,531 --> 00:22:53,167
I HAVEN'T REALLY TALKED TO YOU
THAT MUCH SINCE THAT
378
00:22:53,167 --> 00:22:54,702
CAUSE IT WAS SO FRESH, YOU
KNOW
379
00:22:54,702 --> 00:22:58,038
BUT I KNOW YOU MISS HIM.
DO YOU REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME
380
00:22:58,038 --> 00:23:02,710
YOU MET KOBE
>> ACTUALLY KOBE REMINDED ME OF
381
00:23:02,710 --> 00:23:08,015
THIS STORY
I WAS IN ORLANDO
382
00:23:08,015 --> 00:23:10,284
AND HIM AND HIS FAMILY CAME IN
THE LOCKER ROOM.
383
00:23:10,284 --> 00:23:11,418
AND HE ASKED PENNY FOR AN
AUTOGRAPH AND I GUESS PENNY
384
00:23:11,418 --> 00:23:15,122
KIND OF BLEW HIM OFF OR
WHATEVER
385
00:23:15,122 --> 00:23:17,624
I'M NOT SURE
I DON'T KNOW
386
00:23:17,624 --> 00:23:19,960
BUT THIS IS WHAT KOBE WAS
TELLING ME
387
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:23,530
HE SAID HE CAME UP TO ME AND I
WAS REAL NICE TO HIM
388
00:23:23,530 --> 00:23:25,833
I NEVER KNEW THAT UNTIL ONE DAY
HE TOLD ME
389
00:23:25,833 --> 00:23:28,569
HE WAS LIKE, "YOU REMEMBER ME?
I WAS LIKE, "NO.
390
00:23:28,569 --> 00:23:30,404
HE WAS LIKE, "I CAME IN THE
LOCKER ROOM.
391
00:23:30,404 --> 00:23:31,405
I WAS LIKE, "OH YEAH, THAT WAS
YOU.
392
00:23:31,405 --> 00:23:32,706
WHAT I REALIZED AND LOVED ABOUT
HIM EARLY ON WAS THAT HE WANTED
393
00:23:32,706 --> 00:23:38,512
THE SPOT
HE WANTED TO BE THE BEST
394
00:23:38,512 --> 00:23:40,514
KOBE AND MYSELF, WE PROBABLTY
COULD HAVE GOT ONE OR TWO ON
395
00:23:40,514 --> 00:23:42,983
OUR OWN.
BUT IF IT WASN'T FOR
396
00:23:42,983 --> 00:23:44,184
BRIAN SHAW, RICK FOX, BIG SHOT
BOB, THE GUYS THAT I CALL THE
397
00:23:44,184 --> 00:23:49,423
OTHERS, I DEFINETLY WOULDN'T
HAVE FOUR.
398
00:23:49,423 --> 00:23:50,691
FOR EXAMPLE, YOUR SHOW, YOU'RE
LARRY BIRD, BUT YOU GOT THE
399
00:23:50,691 --> 00:23:51,825
ROOTS, YOU GOT MAGIC JOHNSON,
YOU GOT JORDAN, YOU HAVE
400
00:23:51,825 --> 00:24:00,100
BARKLEY.
THAT'S WHY YOUR SHOW IS LIKE
401
00:24:00,100 --> 00:24:01,301
ONE OF THE ‐‐ IF NOT THE TOP
SHOW OUT THERE, AND YOU'VE BEEN
402
00:24:01,301 --> 00:24:06,340
DOING IT FOR A LONG TIME
AND I REMEMBER I MET YOU IN
403
00:24:06,340 --> 00:24:09,510
BEVERLEY HILLS IN THE ELEVATOR
WITH YOUR LOVELY PARENTS
404
00:24:09,510 --> 00:24:11,245
YOU WERE LIKE, "SHAQ, I GOT
A SECRET
405
00:24:11,245 --> 00:24:13,981
I GOT TELL SOMEBODY.
DON'T TELL NOBODY.
406
00:24:13,981 --> 00:24:17,050
I WAS LIKE, "WHAT?" AND YOU
TOLD ME THE ANNOUNCEMENT, AND I
407
00:24:17,050 --> 00:24:19,820
WAS SO HAPPY FOR YOU CAUSE YOU
HAD A BIG SMILE ON YOUR FACE
408
00:24:19,820 --> 00:24:20,988
AND I KNEW YOUR CAREER CAUSE I
HAD BEEN TO A COUPLE OF YOUR
409
00:24:20,988 --> 00:24:23,090
SHOWS.
I'VE SEEN YOU.
410
00:24:23,090 --> 00:24:24,291
I NEVER WANTED TO BOTHER YOU,
BUT I KNEW THAT WHEN YOU TOOK
411
00:24:24,291 --> 00:24:25,459
OVER THE SHOW, I KNEW THAT YOU
WAS GONNA WIN MULTIPLE
412
00:24:25,459 --> 00:24:28,996
CHAMPIONSHIPS.
BUT WHAT I WANT PEOPLE TO GET
413
00:24:28,996 --> 00:24:30,130
OUT OF IT IS THAT NO MATTER
WHAT YOU MAY HEAR, WHAT YOU
414
00:24:30,130 --> 00:24:36,770
SEE, IT WAS ALL IN THE INTEREST
OF WINNING
415
00:24:36,770 --> 00:24:37,938
AND IF I HAD IT ALL OVER TO DO
IT AGAIN, I'D DO IT THE SAME
416
00:24:37,938 --> 00:24:41,675
WAY.
>> Jimmy GOOD.
417
00:24:41,675 --> 00:24:44,411
>> I ALWAYS RESPECTED THE KID
AND HE ALWAYS RESPECTED ME
418
00:24:44,411 --> 00:24:45,546
I'M LEARNING FROM THIS NOW
BECAUSE SHORTLY BEFORE KOBE
419
00:24:45,546 --> 00:24:49,449
PASSED AWAY, MY SISTER PASSED
AWAY
420
00:24:49,449 --> 00:24:52,085
SO YOU KNOW, IT'S BEEN REALLY
TOUGH FOR ME
421
00:24:52,085 --> 00:24:53,287
SO, I WANT TO URGE EVERYBODY
OUT THERE, IF YOU WANT TO SAY
422
00:24:53,287 --> 00:24:55,622
SOMETHING TO ANYBODY, DON'T
WAIT
423
00:24:55,622 --> 00:24:57,291
I DON'T CARE IF YOU EVER HAD
ARGUMENTS OR IF YOU LOVE THEM,
424
00:24:57,291 --> 00:24:59,660
IF YOU MISS.
IF YOU MISS THEM PICK UP YOUR
425
00:24:59,660 --> 00:25:02,296
PHONE AND TELL THEM YOU MISS
THEM RIGHT THEN.
426
00:25:02,296 --> 00:25:03,497
IF YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT THEM,
MAKE SURE YOU CALL THEM RIGHT
427
00:25:03,497 --> 00:25:05,966
AWAY
CAUSE I WOULD LOVE NOW TO EVEN
428
00:25:05,966 --> 00:25:07,134
CALL HIM AND SAY, "KOBE, I'M
GOING TO POST A PICTURE OF US
429
00:25:07,134 --> 00:25:12,239
WINNING THE CHAMPIONSHIP
20 YEARS AGO
430
00:25:12,239 --> 00:25:16,176
DO YOU BELIEVE WE'RE THAT OLD?
LIKE, I CAN'T DO THAT ANYMORE.
431
00:25:16,176 --> 00:25:17,845
AND WE NEVER REALLY TALKED ON
THE PHONE A LOT.
432
00:25:17,845 --> 00:25:21,415
CAUSE, YOU KNOW, THAT'S HOW WE
AS PLAYERS ARE
433
00:25:21,415 --> 00:25:22,549
WE SPEND A LOT OF TIME
TOGETHER, BUT WE HAVE OTHER
434
00:25:22,549 --> 00:25:25,152
LIVES. WE HAVE WIVES
WE HAVE CHILDREN
435
00:25:25,152 --> 00:25:29,089
WE HAVE BUSINESSES
SO WE SPEND MORE TIME ON THAT.
436
00:25:29,089 --> 00:25:34,361
BUT HE DID A GREAT JOB OF
KEEPING IN TOUCH WITH MY KIDS.
437
00:25:34,361 --> 00:25:35,629
YOU KNOW, HE WAS ALWAYS SWEET
TO HIS KIDS, AND I'LL ALWAYS BE
438
00:25:35,629 --> 00:25:39,533
SWEET TO HIS KIDS.
BUT YOU KNOW, I JUST WISH I
439
00:25:39,533 --> 00:25:42,636
COULD HAVE SAID AT LEAST, "HI.
OR, "YOU MISSED ME, I WAS WIDE
440
00:25:42,636 --> 00:25:45,572
OPEN."
OR, "HEY, YOU NEVER TOLD ME HOW
441
00:25:45,572 --> 00:25:48,575
TO SHOOT FREE THROWS."
OR, "HEY, YOU GOT FIVE
442
00:25:48,575 --> 00:25:50,210
I GOT FOUR
SHOULD I COME BACK THIS YEAR
443
00:25:50,210 --> 00:25:54,114
AND PLAY WITH LeBRON."
LIKE, JUST TO ‐‐
444
00:25:54,114 --> 00:25:55,983
YOU KNOW JUST SHOOT THE BREEZE
AND THAT' MY ONLY REGRET, AND
445
00:25:55,983 --> 00:25:58,485
SAME THING WITH MY SISTER.
I DIDN'T REALLY GET TO SPEND A
446
00:25:58,485 --> 00:26:02,522
A LOT OF TIME WITH HER, YOU
KNOW, I WAS WORKING AND TRYING
447
00:26:02,522 --> 00:26:05,859
TO PROVIDE FOR THE FAMILY.
BUT IT JUST HAUNTS ME EVERY DAY
448
00:26:05,859 --> 00:26:11,298
THAT I COULDN'T EXPRESS MY LAST
FEELINGS TOWARDS HER
449
00:26:11,298 --> 00:26:12,532
SO YEAH, PEOPLE OUT THERE
LISTENING OR WATCHING, IF YOU
450
00:26:12,532 --> 00:26:16,570
WANT TO CALL AND TALK TO
SOMEBODY, DO NOT WAIT.
451
00:26:16,570 --> 00:26:19,640
>> Jimmy: MORE WITH SHAQ WHEN
WE COME BACK
452
00:26:19,640 --> 00:26:20,465
♪
453
00:26:38,453 --> 00:26:40,174
>> Jimmy: HERE IS MORE OF MY
CONVERSATION WITH
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL
454
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:44,568
>> Jimmy: I WANT TO TALK ABOUT
SHAQ'S FUN HOUSE VS. GRONK
455
00:26:44,568 --> 00:26:46,537
BEACH.
YOU GUYS GOING HEAD‐TO‐HEAD.
456
00:26:46,537 --> 00:26:49,707
ALL OF THESE CHALLENGES.
IT'S GONNA BE SUPER FUN.
457
00:26:49,707 --> 00:26:53,110
BUT IT'S RAISING A LOT OF ‐‐
MONEY AND ‐‐ FOR CHARITY
458
00:26:53,110 --> 00:26:54,411
AND ‐‐ DO YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT
THAT AND HOW YOU GOT INVOLVED
459
00:26:54,411 --> 00:26:57,581
IN GENERAL AND ‐
>> YEAH.
460
00:26:57,581 --> 00:26:59,617
YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE THERE'S ‐
YOU KNOW MORE PEOPLE THAT NEED
461
00:26:59,617 --> 00:27:01,652
AFFORDABLE INSURANCE THAN THERE
ARE SPOILED RICH GUYS LIKE ME
462
00:27:01,652 --> 00:27:04,288
AND YOU.
BUT ANYWAY, THE GENERAL AND I,
463
00:27:04,288 --> 00:27:08,626
WE SAID OKAY
WE WANT TO DO SOMETHING BIG TO
464
00:27:08,626 --> 00:27:10,861
ENLIGHTEN PEOPLE, YOU KNOW, TO
MAKE THEM HAPPY.
465
00:27:10,861 --> 00:27:14,431
SO, YOU KNOW, GRONK, YOU KNOW,
WE ARE GOING TO RAISE MONEY FOR
466
00:27:14,431 --> 00:27:16,934
SOCIAL INJUSTICES AND WE'RE
GONNA GIVE MONEY TO THE NAACP,
467
00:27:16,934 --> 00:27:18,836
THE BOYS AND GIRLS CLUB.
WE JUST, YOU KNOW, WE WANNA
468
00:27:18,836 --> 00:27:24,174
URGE PEOPLE, LET'S GET BACK ON
TRACK AND LET'S HAVE FUN
469
00:27:24,174 --> 00:27:27,111
AND I'M BRINGING MY FIANCE TO
THE EVENT.
470
00:27:27,111 --> 00:27:28,746
WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW HER
NAME
471
00:27:28,746 --> 00:27:33,384
>> Jimmy: YES.
♪
472
00:27:33,384 --> 00:27:35,653
I GOT IT
ROSANNA.
473
00:27:35,653 --> 00:27:42,793
>> YES
♪
474
00:27:42,793 --> 00:27:43,894
[ JIMMY STUTTERING ]
>> YES
475
00:27:43,894 --> 00:27:46,096
♪ I'MA BRING MY GIRLFRIEN
TO ‐
476
00:27:46,096 --> 00:27:49,133
ROSANNA ♪
>> Jimmy: I GOT SOME TRIVIA
477
00:27:49,133 --> 00:27:52,169
THAT YOU PROBABLY DON'T KNOW
>> WHAT?
478
00:27:52,169 --> 00:27:55,139
>> Jimmy: WHAT OTHER SONG DID
SHE INSPIRE.
479
00:27:55,139 --> 00:27:57,308
IT'S ROSANNA ARQUETTE.
>> I DON'T KNOW.
480
00:27:57,308 --> 00:27:59,276
I DON'T KNOW
>> Jimmy: "IN YOUR EYES,"
481
00:27:59,276 --> 00:28:02,546
PETER GABRIEL.
>> OH.
482
00:28:02,546 --> 00:28:06,183
I DON'T HAVE THAT ONE.
>> Jimmy: SHE'S MAGIC.
483
00:28:06,183 --> 00:28:07,685
>> I DON'T HAVE THAT ONE
>> Jimmy: SHE'S MAGIC.
484
00:28:07,685 --> 00:28:09,320
>> SHE IS MAGIC.
I DON'T HAVE THAT ONE.
485
00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:17,194
WHAT ABOUT THIS ONE THOUGH
♪
486
00:28:17,194 --> 00:28:18,796
>> Jimmy: "ROCK YOU LIKE A
A HURRICANE.
487
00:28:18,796 --> 00:28:24,969
♪ HERE I AM ♪
>> SO YOU KNOW EVERY SONG.
488
00:28:24,969 --> 00:28:26,503
>> Jimmy: I'LL BE DANCING, BUT
DUDE, YOU KNOW HOW TO GET ME
489
00:28:26,503 --> 00:28:29,006
YOU GOT ME
WHAT ARE THE CHALLENGES YOU ARE
490
00:28:29,006 --> 00:28:32,176
GONNA GO AGAINST GRONK WITH?
>> I THINK WE ARE GOING WITH A
491
00:28:32,176 --> 00:28:33,777
A WING CHANGE.
WE'RE PLAYING A GAME OF
492
00:28:33,777 --> 00:28:36,981
H‐O‐R‐S‐E.
>> Jimmy: WINGS YOU GOT, 'CAUSE
493
00:28:36,981 --> 00:28:39,850
YOU GOT ‐‐ BIG CHICKEN SHAQ.
>> YEAH, BIG CHICKEN SHAQ.
494
00:28:39,850 --> 00:28:41,051
SO YES, WE'LL DO SOME BIG
CHICKEN SHAQ
495
00:28:41,051 --> 00:28:43,887
>> Jimmy: YOU GOT THAT
YOU'D BEAT HIM AT THAT
496
00:28:43,887 --> 00:28:45,122
>> AND THE COMPETITION THAT I
STILL OWE YOU ONE 'CAUSE LAST
497
00:28:45,122 --> 00:28:48,292
TIME YOU BEAT ME AT THIS
COMPETITION.
498
00:28:48,292 --> 00:28:51,128
THE LIP SYNC BATTLE.
I STILL OWE YOU.
499
00:28:51,128 --> 00:28:52,229
YES.
>> Jimmy: NO, YOU WERE GOOD
500
00:28:52,229 --> 00:28:53,864
THOUGH
YOU WERE GOOD THOUGH
501
00:28:53,864 --> 00:28:55,032
YEAH, YEAH
YOU'RE DOING THE LIP SYNC
502
00:28:55,032 --> 00:28:58,636
BATTLE WITH GRONK?
>> YEAH, I'M DOING LIP SYNC
503
00:28:58,636 --> 00:28:59,803
BATTLE
>> Jimmy: I CAN'T WAIT TO PLAY
504
00:28:59,803 --> 00:29:01,872
WITH YOU AND SEE YOU AGAIN,
BUDDY.
505
00:29:01,872 --> 00:29:04,108
KEEP DOING WHAT YOU ARE DOING
AND KEEP MAKING PEOPLE HAPPY
506
00:29:04,108 --> 00:29:05,976
AND MAKING PEOPLE FEEL ‐‐
MAKING THE WORLD A BETTER
507
00:29:05,976 --> 00:29:10,648
PLACE, MAN
YOU ARE ONE IN A MILLION, BUD.
508
00:29:10,648 --> 00:29:12,082
>> ALL RIGHT, BRO.
>> Jimmy: THANK YOU AGAIN FOR
509
00:29:12,082 --> 00:29:13,283
THIS
I APPRECIATE IT.
510
00:29:13,283 --> 00:29:14,485
>> NO PROBLEM.
♪
511
00:29:14,485 --> 00:29:15,753
>> Jimmy: STICK AROUND FOR
JOHN LITHGOW. WE WILL BE RIGHT
512
00:29:15,753 --> 00:29:16,296
BACK EVERYBODY
♪
513
00:29:35,403 --> 00:29:37,519
>> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS ONE
OF OUR FAVORITES
514
00:29:37,519 --> 00:29:39,663
HE IS AN EMMY, TONY AND
GOLDEN GLOBE WINNER.
515
00:29:39,663 --> 00:29:43,398
HE'S AN AUTHOR
HE'S JUST ‐‐ MAN
516
00:29:43,398 --> 00:29:45,601
JACK OF ALL ‐‐ HE'S JUST
UNBELIEVABLE
517
00:29:45,601 --> 00:29:47,369
I KNOW HE'S ONE OF YOUR
ALL‐TIME FAVORITES
518
00:29:47,369 --> 00:29:48,670
ME TOO
ME TOO
519
00:29:48,670 --> 00:29:50,739
WE LOVE HIM.
I'M GONNA TALK TO HIM.
520
00:29:50,739 --> 00:29:51,840
HE'S JUST IN THIS NEW
"PERRY MASON" REMAKE THAT'S ON
521
00:29:51,840 --> 00:29:56,311
HBO.
THAT'S THE BIGGEST DEBUT IN TWO
522
00:29:56,311 --> 00:30:00,816
YEARS ON HBO
HERE IS MY CONVERSATION WITH
THE GREAT JOHN LITHGOW
523
00:30:02,484 --> 00:30:04,853
>> Jimmy: LOOK AT THIS GUY
>> JIMMY
524
00:30:04,853 --> 00:30:08,357
HOW'S IT ‐‐ HOME WITH JIMMY.
HOW ARE YOU?
525
00:30:08,357 --> 00:30:10,759
GREAT TO SEE YOU
>> Jimmy: YOU LOOK GREAT, BUD.
526
00:30:10,759 --> 00:30:13,161
COME ON.
I'M SO HAPPY YOU ARE HERE.
527
00:30:13,161 --> 00:30:15,464
>> OH, I HAVE BEEN SO LOOKING
FORWARD TO THIS.
528
00:30:15,464 --> 00:30:16,665
>> THERE'S SOMEBODY I WANT TO
INTRODUCE YOU THAT'S REALLY
529
00:30:16,665 --> 00:30:18,066
WANTED TO MEET YOU FOR A LONG
TIME
530
00:30:18,066 --> 00:30:19,701
>> OH, IS IT GARY?
>> Jimmy: YES!
531
00:30:19,701 --> 00:30:22,037
GARY
>> YES, LET ME SEE HIM
532
00:30:22,037 --> 00:30:25,073
OH, MY GOD
>> Jimmy: UP, UP, GET UP
533
00:30:25,073 --> 00:30:28,910
COME ON.
YEAH
534
00:30:28,910 --> 00:30:30,879
>> I FINALLY GET TO MEET HIM
HER.
535
00:30:30,879 --> 00:30:33,749
>> Jimmy: THIS IS HER.
THIS IS GARY
536
00:30:33,749 --> 00:30:39,621
>> OH GOD, SHE'S GORGEOUS.
SUCH A GENTLE SOUL
537
00:30:39,621 --> 00:30:41,590
WONDERFUL.
DOES SHE MAKE MANY APPEARANCES
538
00:30:41,590 --> 00:30:44,993
WHILE YOU ARE AT HOME?
>> Jimmy: SHE MADE A COUPLE AND
539
00:30:44,993 --> 00:30:45,861
IT KIND OF WENT TO HER HEAD
A LITTLE BIT
540
00:30:45,861 --> 00:30:49,665
SHE GOT REALLY ‐
>> A DIVA?
541
00:30:49,665 --> 00:30:54,036
>> Jimmy: YEAH
TOTAL DIVA
542
00:30:54,036 --> 00:30:55,237
BUT SHE ALREADY HAS A PAINTING
BY YOU ON OUR WALL
543
00:30:55,237 --> 00:30:57,439
>> I KNOW.
THAT'S WHAT SPOILS HER
544
00:30:57,439 --> 00:30:58,640
YOU SHOULD NEVER HAVE DONE
THAT
545
00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:01,043
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, GARY.
546
00:31:01,043 --> 00:31:02,778
YOU CAN GO
NOW YOU CAN GO
547
00:31:02,778 --> 00:31:04,312
GOOD JOB
>> HOW OLD ARE YOUR KIDS NOW
548
00:31:04,312 --> 00:31:06,882
>> Jimmy: WINNIE IS SEVEN ‐‐
WINNIE IS SIX ABOUT TO BE SEVEN
549
00:31:06,882 --> 00:31:11,453
NEXT MONTH, AND FRANNY IS FIVE
THEY'RE REALLY CUTE.
550
00:31:11,453 --> 00:31:14,289
THEY'RE REALLY CUTE.
YEAH ‐‐ IT'S THE BEST THING IN
551
00:31:14,289 --> 00:31:17,025
THE WORLD.
AND ARE YOU ABOUT TO BECOME
552
00:31:17,025 --> 00:31:21,730
A GRANDFATHER AGAIN?
>> WELL, A THIRD TIME, YES
553
00:31:21,730 --> 00:31:24,800
MY DAUGHTER IS ABOUT TWO WEEKS
AWAY
554
00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:26,034
WE JUST SPENT A COUPLE OF WEEKS
IN TUCSON HELPING HER FEATHER
555
00:31:26,034 --> 00:31:29,404
THE NEST
IT WAS GREAT
556
00:31:29,404 --> 00:31:30,572
>> Jimmy: I AM SENDING HER A
A BOOK
557
00:31:30,572 --> 00:31:34,309
>> OH, GREAT
HOW WONDERFUL.
558
00:31:34,309 --> 00:31:36,111
>> Jimmy: SHE'LL HAVE IT ‐
SHE'LL HAVE IT ‐‐ SHE'LL HAVE
559
00:31:36,111 --> 00:31:37,679
IT BY NEXT WEEK.
SHE WON'T EVEN BE ABLE ‐
560
00:31:37,679 --> 00:31:40,082
>> WONDERFUL
>> Jimmy: OH THAT'S THE BEST
561
00:31:40,082 --> 00:31:42,851
YOU MUST BE THE BEST
GRANDFATHER.
562
00:31:42,851 --> 00:31:47,189
>> MY OLDER GRAND KIDS ARE
NOW 12 AND 15.
563
00:31:47,189 --> 00:31:48,490
AND I HAVE BEEN TAKING THEM TO
BROADWAY SHOWS THEIR WHOLE
564
00:31:48,490 --> 00:31:56,832
LIVES.
AND MORE RECENTLY, I ‐‐ I'VE ‐
565
00:31:56,832 --> 00:31:59,568
I'VE BEEN ‐‐ YOU KNOW, THEY'RE
LEARNING AT HOME
566
00:31:59,568 --> 00:32:04,039
THEY'RE HOME SCHOOLED DURING
THIS TERRIBLE PERIOD
567
00:32:04,039 --> 00:32:05,240
SO THEY GATHERED TOGETHER
A GROUP OF FIVE KIDS AND I HAVE
568
00:32:05,240 --> 00:32:09,511
BEEN GIVING THEM WRITING
CLASSES.
569
00:32:09,511 --> 00:32:13,582
YOU KNOW, ASSIGNING THEM
E. B. WHITE AND GEORGE ORWELL
570
00:32:13,582 --> 00:32:15,450
"ANIMAL FARM" AND ‐‐
>> Jimmy: YEAH
571
00:32:15,450 --> 00:32:16,685
>> YOU KNOW, TAKE ‐‐ HAVING
THEM WRITE LITTLE ESSAYS AND
572
00:32:16,685 --> 00:32:25,894
MARKING UP THEIR ESSAYS.
THEY RANGE IN AGE FROM 8 TO 15
573
00:32:25,894 --> 00:32:27,162
>> SPEAKING OF WRITING, I THINK
THE LAST TIME YOU WERE ON THE
574
00:32:27,162 --> 00:32:28,430
SHOW WE TALKED ABOUT YOUR BOOK
THAT ENDED UP BEING A SMASH
575
00:32:28,430 --> 00:32:31,166
HIT.
>> IT DEBUTED AT NUMBER THREE
576
00:32:31,166 --> 00:32:32,234
ON THE "NEW YORK TIMES"
NON‐FICTION BEST SELLER LIST
577
00:32:32,234 --> 00:32:39,241
BETWEEN ROMAN PHARAOH AND
RACHEL MADDOW.
578
00:32:39,241 --> 00:32:43,311
HOW 'BOUT THAT
[ LAUGHTER ]
579
00:32:43,311 --> 00:32:45,380
SO THEY ASKED ME TO WRITE
ANOTHER ONE.
580
00:32:45,380 --> 00:32:46,481
I SUBMITTED THE LAST POEM AND
THE LAST ILLUSTRATION ON
581
00:32:46,481 --> 00:32:50,352
JUNE 1st
>> Jimmy: OH, DO YOU REMEMBER
582
00:32:50,352 --> 00:32:53,922
WHAT THE LAST POEM WAS
>> YES
583
00:32:53,922 --> 00:32:59,060
IT'S CALLED "TRUMPTY DUMPTY
WANTED A TITLE."
584
00:32:59,060 --> 00:33:00,195
THE TITLE OF THE BOOK IS
"TRUMPTY DUMPTY WANTED A CROWN"
585
00:33:00,195 --> 00:33:01,363
AND THAT'S A THREAD THAT GOES
THROUGH IT HOW DONALD TRUMP,
586
00:33:01,363 --> 00:33:08,370
BIT BY BIT IS ACTING MORE AND
MORE MONARCIC.
587
00:33:08,370 --> 00:33:11,106
>> Jimmy: WHAT'S THE COVER OF
THIS LOOK LIKE
588
00:33:11,106 --> 00:33:12,407
>> OH, AS A MATTER OF FACT THEY
SENT ME AN ADVANCED READER
589
00:33:12,407 --> 00:33:16,444
SAMPLE
THIS IS NOT THE BOOK
590
00:33:16,444 --> 00:33:18,580
>> Jimmy: YEP.
>> THIS IS ‐‐ BUT IT DOES HAVE
591
00:33:18,580 --> 00:33:22,384
THE TITLE AND THAT'S MY
ILLUSTRATION ON THE FRONT.
592
00:33:22,384 --> 00:33:26,388
IF YOU CAN GET A GOOD LOOK AT
IT
593
00:33:26,388 --> 00:33:29,558
"TRUMPTY DUMPTY WANTED A
A CROWN.
594
00:33:29,558 --> 00:33:31,126
AND THERE HE IS.
>> Jimmy: WHEN IS THAT GONNA
595
00:33:31,126 --> 00:33:34,596
COME OUT
DO YOU KNOW YET OR NO?
596
00:33:34,596 --> 00:33:36,765
>> THEY JUST ‐‐ ACTUALLY, I HIT
ALL OF MY DEADLINES.
597
00:33:36,765 --> 00:33:37,632
SO THEY MOVED UP THE
PUBLICATION DATE TO
598
00:33:37,632 --> 00:33:43,038
SEPTEMBER 29th
SO I'LL GET ON TV AND RECITE
599
00:33:43,038 --> 00:33:45,640
ALL KINDS OF POEMS FOR YOU AND
EVERYBODY.
600
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:47,075
>> Jimmy: YEAH, HOPEFULLY WE'LL
HAVE YOU BACK.
601
00:33:47,075 --> 00:33:49,678
I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT
WHAT YOU HAVE GOING ON NOW
602
00:33:49,678 --> 00:33:52,280
WHICH, YOU ALWAYS HAVE
SOMETHING GOING ON
603
00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:55,183
BUT "PERRY MASON" ON HBO
>> SO GOOD
604
00:33:55,183 --> 00:33:57,886
SO GOOD.
HAVE YOU SEEN ANY OF IT?
605
00:33:57,886 --> 00:34:00,822
>> Jimmy: YES.
THE WORLD SAW IT
606
00:34:00,822 --> 00:34:03,258
IT WAS THE BIGGEST DEBUT IN HBO
IN TWO YEARS
607
00:34:03,258 --> 00:34:06,528
>> IT IS SO GOOD
IT IS SO GOOD.
608
00:34:06,528 --> 00:34:10,098
AND IT WAS SO MUCH FUN TO DO
YOU CAN IMA ‐‐ I MEAN, YOU LOOK
609
00:34:10,098 --> 00:34:12,901
AT ALL THOSE GREAT ACTORS.
ACTING WITH THEM WAS JUST SUCH
610
00:34:12,901 --> 00:34:19,975
A JOY.
>> Jimmy: YEAH
611
00:34:19,975 --> 00:34:21,176
AND WAS IT ‐‐ BEING IN L. A. IN
THAT PERIOD, THAT TIME PERIOD.
612
00:34:21,176 --> 00:34:22,510
WAS IT THE 30s
WHEN WAS THAT.
613
00:34:22,510 --> 00:34:25,113
>> YEAH.
YEAH
614
00:34:25,113 --> 00:34:26,314
THESE TWO GREAT WRITERS,
ROLIN JONES AND RON FITZGERALD,
615
00:34:26,314 --> 00:34:27,549
THEY TOOK "PERRY MASON," THE
CLASSIC 50s CRIME LAW AND ORDER
616
00:34:27,549 --> 00:34:28,617
SERIES AND THEY TOOK IT BACK
20 YEARS TO THE 1930s IN
617
00:34:28,617 --> 00:34:29,584
LOS ANGELES WHEN
EARL STANLEY GARDNER ACTUALLY
618
00:34:29,584 --> 00:34:45,734
WROTE THE "PERRY MASON"
STORIES.
619
00:34:45,734 --> 00:34:46,935
AND THEY WROTE IT IN THAT MODE
AND WE SHOT IT IN LOS ANGELES
620
00:34:46,935 --> 00:34:47,769
IN ‐‐ SORT OF THE ERA OF
CHINATOWN AND
621
00:34:47,769 --> 00:34:56,945
L.A. CONFIDENTIAL, THAT
WONDERFUL FEELING.
622
00:34:56,945 --> 00:34:58,113
BUT THEN THE SENSIBILITY OF THE
SERIES TAKES IT FORWARD
623
00:34:58,113 --> 00:35:02,317
50 YEARS
I MEAN, HERE'S A ‐‐ HERE IS
624
00:35:02,317 --> 00:35:07,923
A "PERRY MASON" SERIES THAT
DEALS WITH RACIAL INJUSTICE AND
625
00:35:07,923 --> 00:35:17,132
POLICE BRUTALITY AND CORRUPTION
IN POLICE AND LAW.
626
00:35:17,132 --> 00:35:18,300
AND YET IT HAS THE FEELING OF
A WONDERFUL 1930s LIKE CRIME
627
00:35:18,300 --> 00:35:25,206
NOIRE DIRECTED BY SOMEONE LIKE
HOWARD HAWKS
628
00:35:25,206 --> 00:35:28,944
IT'S JUST A WONDERFUL SERIES
AND MATTHEW RHYS HAS COMPLETELY
629
00:35:28,944 --> 00:35:33,748
REIMAGINED IT.
HE SORT OF ERASED THE MEMORY OF
630
00:35:33,748 --> 00:35:36,618
RAYMOND BURR FOREVER
>> Jimmy: WELL I SORT OF
631
00:35:36,618 --> 00:35:37,485
FEEL ‐‐ 'CAUSE I KNEW
RAYMOND BURR, I KNOW
632
00:35:37,485 --> 00:35:40,956
"PERRY MASON" THE ORIGINAL TV
SERIES AND I GO, "OH YEAH.
633
00:35:40,956 --> 00:35:44,326
I TOTALLY ‐‐ AND IT IS LIKE,
"OH, NOT QUITE."
634
00:35:44,326 --> 00:35:48,830
THIS IS DARKER
>> YOU WATCH THE FIRST TEN
635
00:35:48,830 --> 00:35:50,131
MINUTES OF THIS AND IT IS LIKE
JUMPING ON A ROLLER COASTER AND
636
00:35:50,131 --> 00:35:51,232
SAYING, "WAIT A MINUTE, I
THOUGHT I WAS GETTING ON A
637
00:35:51,232 --> 00:35:54,736
A SUBWAY."
IT'S JUST GREAT.
638
00:35:54,736 --> 00:35:56,171
>> Jimmy: I ALWAYS LOVE SEEING
YOU.
639
00:35:56,171 --> 00:35:59,774
I WANT TO SEE YOU IN PERSON.
AND I WANT YOU ON BEFORE THE
640
00:35:59,774 --> 00:36:02,510
BOOK COMES OUT, BECAUSE I NEED
TO TLAK TO YOU WHENEVER.
641
00:36:02,510 --> 00:36:04,479
YOU HAVE AN OPEN LINE TO MY
ZOOM
642
00:36:04,479 --> 00:36:07,882
WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO.
I'LL GIVE YOU SOCIAL DISTANCE.
643
00:36:07,882 --> 00:36:09,751
YOU CAN COME TO MY HOUSE
YOU CAN LIVE WITH US
644
00:36:09,751 --> 00:36:11,686
WE WOULD LOVE YOU.
>> JIMMY, IT'S ALWAYS GREAT TO
645
00:36:11,686 --> 00:36:14,889
DO YOUR SHOW
I'LL COME TO 30 ROCK WITH
646
00:36:14,889 --> 00:36:18,560
A MASK ON IF YOU WOULD LIKE.
>> Jimmy: YES.
647
00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:19,761
>> AND I AM SO DELIGHTED TO
FINALLY MEET THE SUBJECT OF MY
648
00:36:19,761 --> 00:36:22,297
ART.
GARY
649
00:36:22,297 --> 00:36:24,599
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: BYE, BUD
650
00:36:24,599 --> 00:36:25,567
♪
>> Jimmy: THANK YOU
651
00:36:25,567 --> 00:36:26,768
JOHN LITHGOW
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH A
652
00:36:26,768 --> 00:36:29,704
A PERFORMANCE BY OZUNA
COME ON BACK
653
00:36:29,704 --> 00:36:30,551
♪
654
00:36:49,819 --> 00:36:52,924
>> Jimmy: PERFORMING A MEDLEY
OF THE SONGS "CARAMELO" AND
"MAMACITA" HERE IS OZUNA
655
00:36:54,258 --> 00:37:05,469
♪
[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE
656
00:37:05,469 --> 00:37:11,475
♪
657
00:37:11,475 --> 00:37:56,854
[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE
♪
♪
658
00:37:59,290 --> 00:38:28,486
[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE
♪
659
00:38:31,455 --> 00:38:54,111
♪
[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE
660
00:38:57,181 --> 00:39:29,747
♪
♪
[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE
661
00:39:31,182 --> 00:39:53,170
♪
♪
662
00:39:53,170 --> 00:40:19,730
[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE
♪
663
00:40:19,730 --> 00:40:22,800
♪
[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE
664
00:40:22,800 --> 00:40:32,343
♪
♪
665
00:40:32,343 --> 00:40:33,644
>> Jimmy: IT'S BEAUTIFUL
♪
666
00:40:33,644 --> 00:40:34,712
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING
THE SHOW
667
00:40:34,712 --> 00:40:36,046
WE HAVE ANOTHER SHOW TOMORROW
NIGHT.
668
00:40:36,046 --> 00:40:37,448
WASH YOUR HANDS, DON'T TOUCH
YOUR FACE.
669
00:40:37,448 --> 00:40:50,361
STAY SAFE.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
56572
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