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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,620 --> 00:00:05,000 [thunder and lightning] 2 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:17,689 [lightning] 3 00:00:17,689 --> 00:00:24,724 [electronic music] 4 00:00:24,724 --> 00:00:27,413 That is the show, I'd like to thank my guest Roger Griffith of Cal Tec, 5 00:00:27,413 --> 00:00:30,137 fashion designer and my new BFF, Deven Crane. 6 00:00:30,137 --> 00:00:33,206 And of course the always loquacious, Brian Eno. 7 00:00:33,206 --> 00:00:37,793 And now, unfortunately, 8 00:00:37,793 --> 00:00:40,827 This. [audience laughs] 9 00:00:40,827 --> 00:00:44,586 Yesterday, I suffered 10 00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:48,689 from what some are calling, an on air meltdown. 11 00:00:48,689 --> 00:00:51,620 [audience laughter] 12 00:00:51,620 --> 00:00:53,827 The powers that be are convinced that I 13 00:00:53,827 --> 00:00:56,965 said some things, and did some things that I shouldn't have done. 14 00:00:56,965 --> 00:01:04,827 And those powers, including my wife and producer of this show, Claire, 15 00:01:04,827 --> 00:01:08,103 have uh made it clear that I need to publicly apologize.. 16 00:01:08,103 --> 00:01:09,448 [audience laughs] 17 00:01:09,448 --> 00:01:11,448 Now. 18 00:01:11,448 --> 00:01:14,655 And if I do then, I get to keep my show. 19 00:01:14,655 --> 00:01:18,551 [giggles] 20 00:01:18,551 --> 00:01:22,517 Here's the thing, I could apologize all day long, 21 00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:26,172 but that is not going to get my show back, 22 00:01:26,172 --> 00:01:31,379 because the truth is, it hasn't been my show for quite some time. 23 00:01:31,379 --> 00:01:36,034 so I'm not going to apologize. Not going to do it. 24 00:01:36,034 --> 00:01:38,551 I'm going to leave. 25 00:01:38,551 --> 00:01:42,517 [audience laughs] You just watched my last show. 26 00:01:42,517 --> 00:01:46,206 I know, I want to thank all of you for taking 27 00:01:46,206 --> 00:01:50,103 this journey with me for all these years. 28 00:01:50,103 --> 00:01:56,931 and I know, that our paths will cross again. 29 00:01:56,931 --> 00:01:58,793 So for the last time, I'm Dick Romans 30 00:01:58,793 --> 00:02:02,655 from somewhere in Los Angeles, this has been 31 00:02:02,655 --> 00:02:14,931 And, Or None of the Above. 32 00:02:14,931 --> 00:02:19,275 [crickets] 33 00:02:19,275 --> 00:02:22,655 Ok, hiatus is over, enough is enough. 34 00:02:22,655 --> 00:02:25,000 Time to get back to the.. in the swing, 35 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,000 time to get to the old 36 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:33,413 Dick Roman's magic, here we go. 37 00:02:33,413 --> 00:02:38,896 [clears throat] today is April... 38 00:02:38,896 --> 00:02:44,241 [crickets] 39 00:02:44,241 --> 00:02:48,344 Doesn't matter. 40 00:02:48,344 --> 00:02:54,172 It's all the same day anyway. 41 00:02:54,172 --> 00:02:57,379 Today on the show we have a very special guest. 42 00:02:57,379 --> 00:03:02,241 So happy that he is here with us today. 43 00:03:02,241 --> 00:03:05,344 Dick Romans, world class fuck up. 44 00:03:05,344 --> 00:03:10,517 and his dog. And later in the show... 45 00:03:10,517 --> 00:03:14,896 we'll have uh Dick Romans pop by to... 46 00:03:14,896 --> 00:03:18,172 set himself on fire. 47 00:03:18,172 --> 00:03:24,655 That should be fun. 48 00:03:24,655 --> 00:03:26,793 Alright. 49 00:03:26,793 --> 00:03:30,413 It's your turn to be Dick Romans, go ahead. 50 00:03:30,413 --> 00:03:49,689 It's easier than it looks. 51 00:03:49,689 --> 00:03:56,241 [upbeat music] 52 00:03:56,241 --> 00:03:57,551 ♪ One, two, three four 53 00:03:57,551 --> 00:04:13,931 [banjo music] 54 00:04:13,931 --> 00:04:18,620 ♪ I'm not afraid of nothing ♪ 55 00:04:18,620 --> 00:04:23,758 - Seriously? 56 00:04:23,758 --> 00:04:24,931 ♪ I'm winning 57 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,379 in my way ♪ 58 00:04:27,379 --> 00:04:31,034 - Hurry up. [grunts] 59 00:04:31,034 --> 00:04:33,689 ♪ No more waiting on 60 00:04:33,689 --> 00:04:37,586 tomorrow ♪ 61 00:04:37,586 --> 00:04:40,137 - Come on now. 62 00:04:40,137 --> 00:04:43,448 ♪ This dog's gonna have his day ♪ 63 00:04:43,448 --> 00:04:48,379 - Let's go. 64 00:04:48,379 --> 00:04:52,586 ♪ And danger don't discourage 65 00:04:52,586 --> 00:04:57,586 [crash] 66 00:04:57,586 --> 00:04:59,344 [footsteps] 67 00:04:59,344 --> 00:05:04,310 Claire? 68 00:05:04,310 --> 00:05:08,137 Why is the front door locked? 69 00:05:08,137 --> 00:05:43,137 What the hell, Claire? 70 00:05:43,137 --> 00:05:48,862 [glass clinks] 71 00:05:48,862 --> 00:05:56,551 [liquid pouring] 72 00:05:56,551 --> 00:06:24,482 [glass clinks] 73 00:06:24,482 --> 00:06:29,827 That's better. 74 00:06:29,827 --> 00:06:32,827 - [Dick] This is not a typical divorce, pNeil ok, it's not about 75 00:06:32,827 --> 00:06:33,758 the house, car, and the dog. 76 00:06:33,758 --> 00:06:36,172 - [Neil] Look, try and calm down. Ok... 77 00:06:36,172 --> 00:06:38,206 I, I have everything. I'm reviewing it. 78 00:06:38,206 --> 00:06:39,965 - My entire life is in this envelope, 79 00:06:39,965 --> 00:06:42,793 ten years of creative collaboration, and a production company. 80 00:06:42,793 --> 00:06:45,172 And [blustering] 81 00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:47,034 - [Dick] Fucking everything!! 82 00:06:47,034 --> 00:06:49,172 - [Neil] I need you to think happy thoughts, you have to think 83 00:06:49,172 --> 00:06:51,000 positive ok, everything is going to be great. 84 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:52,793 You have to take a big deep breath Ok?p 85 00:06:52,793 --> 00:06:54,103 - [Dick] I'm going to tell you how to do it, I'm going to tell you 86 00:06:54,103 --> 00:06:55,793 how to do your job. 87 00:06:55,793 --> 00:06:57,931 You go back to everybody, and you say, I talked to Dick, 88 00:06:57,931 --> 00:06:59,379 and Dick said I'm not signing the papers that are in the envelope. 89 00:06:59,379 --> 00:07:02,586 Under no circumstance. Ever. 90 00:07:02,586 --> 00:07:04,724 - [Neil] Look I'll tell you what. 91 00:07:04,724 --> 00:07:07,448 Go to one of them fruit and nut places go get yourself Kombucha tea. 92 00:07:07,448 --> 00:07:09,275 Kombucha. 93 00:07:09,275 --> 00:07:10,793 I'm going to send you some wellness cream. Use it. 94 00:07:10,793 --> 00:07:12,482 - [Dick] I love you but that doesn't make any, 95 00:07:12,482 --> 00:07:15,034 - I don't even.. that's the worst.. 96 00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:17,034 - [Neil] Dickie look, I gotta go to meet a couple of douchebags, 97 00:07:17,034 --> 00:07:18,275 about some shit, okay? I got to go. 98 00:07:18,275 --> 00:07:25,344 You got to go, yeah. Well... [dial tone] 99 00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:28,551 [slow guitar music] 100 00:07:28,551 --> 00:07:32,517 Non canine issues that are complex 101 00:07:32,517 --> 00:07:36,275 and um, yeah, so. 102 00:07:36,275 --> 00:07:38,551 I just wanted to tell you that you're not... 103 00:07:38,551 --> 00:07:40,689 that I love you and you're going to be fine. 104 00:07:40,689 --> 00:07:44,068 That we're going to be alright together. 105 00:07:44,068 --> 00:07:47,827 We're going to sort it out. 106 00:07:47,827 --> 00:07:50,137 [sighs] 107 00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:59,344 [knocking] 108 00:07:59,344 --> 00:08:01,310 - [Lenny] Hi. - [Dick] Hi, can I help you with something? 109 00:08:01,310 --> 00:08:04,034 - [Lenny] Yeah, I'm here for Claire. 110 00:08:04,034 --> 00:08:05,931 [Dick] Oh.. 111 00:08:05,931 --> 00:08:10,103 Um.. [exhales] 112 00:08:10,103 --> 00:08:13,827 this is a, little awkward. - [Lenny] Huh. 113 00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,931 [Dick] Um.. 114 00:08:15,931 --> 00:08:20,000 Claire, unfortunately had 115 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:23,655 a really bad accident at the uh.. 116 00:08:23,655 --> 00:08:24,862 airport. 117 00:08:24,862 --> 00:08:26,862 - [Lenny] Oh my god. 118 00:08:26,862 --> 00:08:29,586 - Well, we can cry for God all we want, but it's not going to bring 119 00:08:29,586 --> 00:08:32,344 Claire's face back. 120 00:08:32,344 --> 00:08:34,896 - [Lenny] What? - [Dick] Claire's face was sheared off.. 121 00:08:34,896 --> 00:08:37,103 by an airplane propeller. 122 00:08:37,103 --> 00:08:39,413 - [Lenny] What? - [Dick] Claire, was actually fooling around 123 00:08:39,413 --> 00:08:44,206 acting like a little, "Oh everything's so fun on an airplane!" 124 00:08:44,206 --> 00:08:45,241 On the airport tarmac." 125 00:08:45,241 --> 00:08:47,551 And then, whack! 126 00:08:47,551 --> 00:08:51,000 The thing just cut her head in half. 127 00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:52,172 - [Lenny] Who are you? 128 00:08:52,172 --> 00:08:53,655 - [Dick] Who are you? 129 00:08:53,655 --> 00:08:54,896 - [Lenny] I'm the caterer. 130 00:08:54,896 --> 00:08:56,896 - [Dick] Oh it's nice to meet you, the caterer. 131 00:08:56,896 --> 00:08:58,034 - [Lenny] Nice to meet you. 132 00:08:58,034 --> 00:08:59,206 - [Dick] Are you stepping in for Lenny? 133 00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:01,413 - Yeah, no. I'm Lenny, I'm Lenny Wright. 134 00:09:01,413 --> 00:09:04,965 Wright Caterers. I'm dropping stuff off for the party. 135 00:09:04,965 --> 00:09:08,793 - Ooh, there's a party huh? Am I invited, I love parties, Lenny. 136 00:09:08,793 --> 00:09:10,827 [laughing] - [Lenny] I mean I don't know. 137 00:09:10,827 --> 00:09:14,862 Are you not hosting a party for 20 people? 138 00:09:14,862 --> 00:09:17,000 Anniversary party? [Dick] What? 139 00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:29,000 - [Lenny] All week? 140 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,551 [Dick] There's a party? 141 00:09:30,551 --> 00:09:32,655 - [Lenny] Yeah. - [Dick] What's today? 142 00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:35,862 - [Lenny] Thursday. 143 00:09:35,862 --> 00:09:37,448 - [Dick] Fuck. 144 00:09:37,448 --> 00:09:39,793 - [Lenny] Looks like you got your hands full but I got to... 145 00:09:39,793 --> 00:09:42,655 - [Dick] Yeah look, Lenny the caterer in about 24 hours I got a bunch of people 146 00:09:42,655 --> 00:09:44,724 descending on my home to celebrate a ten yea anniversary 147 00:09:44,724 --> 00:09:46,413 that was never consummated because my wife 148 00:09:46,413 --> 00:09:49,413 Claire, the ass face, decided to divorce me 149 00:09:49,413 --> 00:09:51,517 this morning so please, 150 00:09:51,517 --> 00:09:53,517 if you'll excuse I'm trying to stop an embarrassment 151 00:09:53,517 --> 00:09:55,448 of legendary proportions from unfolding. 152 00:09:55,448 --> 00:09:56,758 Thank you. 153 00:09:56,758 --> 00:10:02,068 - [Lenny] Alright, well what do I do about this? 154 00:10:02,068 --> 00:10:03,655 - [Dick] It's a lot of crap. 155 00:10:03,655 --> 00:10:06,586 - [Lenny] It's a lot of work. - [Dick] The booze is ours? 156 00:10:06,586 --> 00:10:08,896 - [Lenny] Yep, it goes in the bar. 157 00:10:08,896 --> 00:10:11,896 - [Dick] Huh, alright, well you can take that inside. I'll take the booze. 158 00:10:11,896 --> 00:10:13,965 - Ok. - What's this? 159 00:10:13,965 --> 00:10:16,068 - [Lenny] That's my lasagna, - Oh and what's in the... 160 00:10:16,068 --> 00:10:20,862 - Cheesecake. - [Dick] Oh my god. Wow. 161 00:10:20,862 --> 00:10:26,068 Ok, time out. Cheesecake. 162 00:10:26,068 --> 00:10:30,413 Try the lasagna, and the booze. 163 00:10:30,413 --> 00:10:32,827 - What do you want me to do with the rest of the stuff? 164 00:10:32,827 --> 00:10:38,241 - [Dick] I don't know. Lenny, find some skinny kids, feed them. 165 00:10:38,241 --> 00:10:40,310 [phone ringing] - Hey Dickie, how are you brother? How are things up there? 166 00:10:40,310 --> 00:10:42,931 - [Dick] Not good, really not good right now, 167 00:10:42,931 --> 00:10:44,827 man it's dire up here. Ok. 168 00:10:44,827 --> 00:10:46,965 Claire left. 169 00:10:46,965 --> 00:10:49,000 - [Micky] Wait a minute. Left, left? 170 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,931 - She left. Divorce. And now I got to cancel the week. 171 00:10:51,931 --> 00:10:53,620 - [Micky] The week, what was the week? 172 00:10:53,620 --> 00:10:56,137 - [Dick] The week, it's the anniversary week, is this week, 173 00:10:56,137 --> 00:10:57,551 you were coming up here right? 174 00:10:57,551 --> 00:10:59,551 - [Micky] Probably? 175 00:10:59,551 --> 00:11:02,448 - [Dick] Micky, really? you know what? It doesn't matter. 176 00:11:02,448 --> 00:11:03,896 There's events planned on every day. 177 00:11:03,896 --> 00:11:05,586 There's a bunch of people coming up here right now. 178 00:11:05,586 --> 00:11:07,689 - [Micky] Hold on second, I'm here for you. 179 00:11:07,689 --> 00:11:09,793 What can I do for you, little brother? 180 00:11:09,793 --> 00:11:12,206 - [Dick] I don't know, I don't want you to go 181 00:11:12,206 --> 00:11:13,586 out of your way to do anything. 182 00:11:13,586 --> 00:11:16,724 I don't know, still come up anyway. 183 00:11:16,724 --> 00:11:18,689 - [Micky] Solo [mumbling] - [Dick] Some brother time? I don't know.... 184 00:11:18,689 --> 00:11:21,137 - [Micky] Yup! Yes! Good! - [Dick] Yeah? 185 00:11:21,137 --> 00:11:23,551 - [Micky] What?! No. - [Woman] Wait? 186 00:11:23,551 --> 00:11:25,724 - [Micky] Not you. I can't Dick. 187 00:11:25,724 --> 00:11:27,551 This is just not a good time. 188 00:11:27,551 --> 00:11:30,000 Hey, you know what? I got a better idea, 189 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:31,655 why don't you come down and see me, get a little L.A. time. 190 00:11:31,655 --> 00:11:34,137 We'll catch up, get a little hummus. 191 00:11:34,137 --> 00:11:36,068 Pick up a bunch of uppers and go paint balling? 192 00:11:36,068 --> 00:11:38,448 [aside] Why are you laughing at that? p[Woman] That sounds awesome. 193 00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:40,758 - [Micky] People paint ball. 194 00:11:40,758 --> 00:11:42,793 - [Dick] I'm not in that state of mind right now. 195 00:11:42,793 --> 00:11:44,931 Alright, we'll listen man you sound good, 196 00:11:44,931 --> 00:11:47,344 and really glad you called, and give Claire my love. 197 00:11:47,344 --> 00:11:51,793 Yeah, you too, and like I said... [dial tone] Did you hang up? 198 00:11:51,793 --> 00:11:56,413 Son of a bitch. 199 00:11:56,413 --> 00:11:59,206 Hi, Patty, John, I'm sorry I have to do this right now. 200 00:11:59,206 --> 00:12:01,275 I'm calling to... I got to cancel the week. 201 00:12:01,275 --> 00:12:05,724 Thomas, Jessie, it's Dick, I got to talk to you, 202 00:12:05,724 --> 00:12:06,931 The week. 203 00:12:06,931 --> 00:12:08,551 We're concealing the week. 204 00:12:08,551 --> 00:12:09,896 I'm trying to send everybody emails, and stuff 205 00:12:09,896 --> 00:12:12,379 Claire, just fucking bailed on me. 206 00:12:12,379 --> 00:12:13,862 Everybody is coming in 24 hrs 207 00:12:13,862 --> 00:12:15,896 I'm just trying to get everybody to stay goddamn home 208 00:12:15,896 --> 00:12:19,000 Weren't you invited? 209 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:23,448 It's life, we'll figure it out one way or the other, 210 00:12:23,448 --> 00:12:24,448 or we won't. 211 00:12:24,448 --> 00:12:26,448 Ah, this is so shitty dude. 212 00:12:26,448 --> 00:12:28,275 I can't control everything in the universe. 213 00:12:28,275 --> 00:12:31,000 People think I can, but I can't. 214 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,896 If you hear from Claire. Tell her that 215 00:12:33,896 --> 00:12:36,206 I've been thinking about her a lot. 216 00:12:36,206 --> 00:12:38,344 And I hate her guts. 217 00:12:38,344 --> 00:12:40,689 Could you tell her that her father died? 218 00:12:40,689 --> 00:12:43,379 Just tell her that some people home invaded the house. 219 00:12:43,379 --> 00:12:45,034 And that I was killed. 220 00:12:45,034 --> 00:12:48,965 Bye bye. 221 00:12:48,965 --> 00:12:53,655 [country music] 222 00:12:53,655 --> 00:12:56,827 Want a taste? 223 00:12:56,827 --> 00:12:58,517 You know what? 224 00:12:58,517 --> 00:13:01,310 This is kind of an opportunity. 225 00:13:01,310 --> 00:13:04,379 We could do stuff that we could never do before. 226 00:13:04,379 --> 00:13:06,068 You want to sleep in the bed? 227 00:13:06,068 --> 00:13:12,310 Done. I can wear my hat. 228 00:13:12,310 --> 00:13:14,137 I could wear my hat. 229 00:13:14,137 --> 00:13:20,103 Ok, what do you think? 230 00:13:20,103 --> 00:13:23,103 I know what we can do! 231 00:13:23,103 --> 00:13:25,620 Let's break some of Mommy's shit. 232 00:13:25,620 --> 00:13:28,655 [guitar music] 233 00:13:28,655 --> 00:13:31,482 [high pitched voice] Don't you just love this color Dick? 234 00:13:31,482 --> 00:13:33,931 You should paint your office that color! 235 00:13:33,931 --> 00:13:39,758 Let's buy only wine glasses since we live in the wine country! 236 00:13:39,758 --> 00:13:42,931 ♪ Well it's time to go! Yeah it's time to go! ♪ 237 00:13:42,931 --> 00:13:44,827 - It's a bunt! 238 00:13:44,827 --> 00:13:47,206 ♪ Kisses that last all through 239 00:13:47,206 --> 00:13:52,862 the night, round and round like a satellite ♪ 240 00:13:52,862 --> 00:13:57,655 ♪ Over stocked clown car that's ready to go ♪ 241 00:13:57,655 --> 00:14:00,517 [growling] ♪ When it's time to go 242 00:14:00,517 --> 00:14:02,724 ♪ Yeah it's time to go 243 00:14:02,724 --> 00:14:06,172 Give me the dress! 244 00:14:06,172 --> 00:14:10,310 Don't waste all the toothpaste Dick! 245 00:14:10,310 --> 00:14:13,896 You're using too much! 246 00:14:13,896 --> 00:14:18,137 All you need is a pea sized amount. 247 00:14:18,137 --> 00:14:22,000 Just a tiny, little pea size. 248 00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:26,793 Then you can 249 00:14:26,793 --> 00:14:30,896 I don't care about your rules about toothpaste! 250 00:14:30,896 --> 00:14:34,931 I don't care about toothpaste rules, they don't apply to me anymore. 251 00:14:34,931 --> 00:14:37,896 So this is how much toothpaste I use. 252 00:14:37,896 --> 00:14:39,862 This is what I like to use. 253 00:14:39,862 --> 00:14:43,862 This is the amount that is satisfying for me, right here. 254 00:14:43,862 --> 00:14:45,344 This is it. 255 00:14:45,344 --> 00:14:48,724 [high pitch voice] Dick, I want a divorce! 256 00:14:48,724 --> 00:14:52,068 ♪ Red hot love burning in my veins, 257 00:14:52,068 --> 00:14:55,137 now memories are the scant remains ♪ 258 00:14:55,137 --> 00:14:59,172 ♪ I walked a million miles just to wake up with the after glow. 259 00:14:59,172 --> 00:15:04,586 Don't shoot arrows at nothing Dick! 260 00:15:04,586 --> 00:15:06,896 ♪ Well it's time to go, yeah it's time to go! ♪ 261 00:15:06,896 --> 00:15:11,275 [crash] 262 00:15:11,275 --> 00:15:28,000 [upbeat guitar music] 263 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:31,689 I'm not an orthopedist Dick, but the imaging was negative 264 00:15:31,689 --> 00:15:36,758 so my guess is you probably have some low grade patella 265 00:15:36,758 --> 00:15:39,758 tendon damage and, or medial meniscus bruising 266 00:15:39,758 --> 00:15:43,103 either way, it ain't very serious, and it ain't life threatening. 267 00:15:43,103 --> 00:15:48,034 Alright, let's see now, I got a.. goddammit. 268 00:15:48,034 --> 00:15:49,896 - [Dick] What are you looking for? 269 00:15:49,896 --> 00:15:51,689 - Oh, bear with me. Patty? 270 00:15:51,689 --> 00:15:56,551 Oh what the hell! Nevermind Patty, found it! 271 00:15:56,551 --> 00:15:58,896 Haha, look at that there. [groans] 272 00:15:58,896 --> 00:16:01,689 Now three very important steps when you are putting this brace on. 273 00:16:01,689 --> 00:16:07,448 One, always apply the brace from the ankle to the thigh like this. 274 00:16:07,448 --> 00:16:09,724 Step two. Always make sure the knee setting is 275 00:16:09,724 --> 00:16:11,586 set at minus two. 276 00:16:11,586 --> 00:16:14,655 And three, and this is the most important step of all. 277 00:16:14,655 --> 00:16:20,172 After you've completed steps one and two, 278 00:16:20,172 --> 00:16:23,034 get a small tube of salve. You squeeze about a 279 00:16:23,034 --> 00:16:24,620 dime sized amount 280 00:16:24,620 --> 00:16:26,413 into the palm of your hand and rub that vigorously 281 00:16:26,413 --> 00:16:30,137 into your vagina. [giggling] 282 00:16:30,137 --> 00:16:32,241 - [Dick] Can I go now? 283 00:16:32,241 --> 00:16:34,034 - Does that mean I can back to my bird watching? 284 00:16:34,034 --> 00:16:38,034 - [Dick] Sure. - [Doctor] Scram. 285 00:16:38,034 --> 00:16:46,551 [car engine] 286 00:16:46,551 --> 00:16:50,620 [rattling] 287 00:16:50,620 --> 00:16:58,931 [clattering] 288 00:16:58,931 --> 00:17:11,793 [groans] 289 00:17:11,793 --> 00:17:15,689 Minor set back. 290 00:17:15,689 --> 00:17:19,931 Not a big deal, we'll get 'em tomorrow 291 00:17:19,931 --> 00:17:24,103 we'll take over the world. 292 00:17:24,103 --> 00:17:45,034 [upbeat guitar music] 293 00:17:45,034 --> 00:17:49,103 ♪ Don't do it, don't do it again 294 00:17:49,103 --> 00:17:54,827 to your self my friend, oh friend ♪ 295 00:17:54,827 --> 00:17:59,068 ♪ You know 296 00:17:59,068 --> 00:18:05,931 I get hurt in the end. ♪ 297 00:18:05,931 --> 00:18:10,137 ♪ Come on, come on come home 298 00:18:10,137 --> 00:18:14,586 you know I get so alone. Alone ♪ 299 00:18:14,586 --> 00:18:19,724 Does it show? ♪ 300 00:18:19,724 --> 00:18:29,689 ♪ I need an anecdote 301 00:18:29,689 --> 00:18:34,689 ♪ I get so alone 302 00:18:34,689 --> 00:18:38,413 [liquid pouring] 303 00:18:38,413 --> 00:18:39,724 [grunt] 304 00:18:39,724 --> 00:18:45,827 Yeah! Yeah! That's sweet! 305 00:18:45,827 --> 00:18:52,724 [beeping] 306 00:18:52,724 --> 00:18:54,724 [beeping] No, no, no. 307 00:18:54,724 --> 00:18:56,413 No, we're all filled up on the douche bag department. 308 00:18:56,413 --> 00:19:00,137 - [Thomas] Whoo! Part - tay! 309 00:19:00,137 --> 00:19:03,517 - [Dick] Thomas, what, hey! 310 00:19:03,517 --> 00:19:05,448 - My god, what happened to your leg? 311 00:19:05,448 --> 00:19:06,827 - What the hell's going on buddy? [Dick] I was just chopping 312 00:19:06,827 --> 00:19:08,172 some wood and I, I fell down. 313 00:19:08,172 --> 00:19:10,448 - In your robe? 314 00:19:10,448 --> 00:19:12,448 - You really shouldn't be walking around with an axe, Dick. 315 00:19:12,448 --> 00:19:13,689 If I could, just real quick.. [Tom] Bud, where are your pants? 316 00:19:13,689 --> 00:19:15,793 - [Dick] You're not supposed to be here. 317 00:19:15,793 --> 00:19:17,413 - Why? - [Tom] Yeah, missed the party? 318 00:19:17,413 --> 00:19:21,620 - No, see the thing, Tommy, the party's canceled, Claire.. 319 00:19:21,620 --> 00:19:25,620 wants a divorce. - Oh god. - What? 320 00:19:25,620 --> 00:19:27,793 - [Dick] I left you guys a message. 321 00:19:27,793 --> 00:19:29,620 I sent you an email, I explained the whole thing in an email. 322 00:19:29,620 --> 00:19:32,068 - No, Dick I changed the email to a different email. 323 00:19:32,068 --> 00:19:35,000 - I left a message on the phone. - A home phone? - [Dick] Maybe 324 00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:37,827 - I think so. - No Dick, nobody checks the home phone, 325 00:19:37,827 --> 00:19:40,241 you gotta call my cell. 326 00:19:40,241 --> 00:19:42,758 - Here's what we're going to do, you can drop the farm implement, and we'll put some 327 00:19:42,758 --> 00:19:45,379 trousers on you. And I'll make a meal.pWe'll talk about this. 328 00:19:45,379 --> 00:19:47,344 - [Dick] No, no, no... 329 00:19:47,344 --> 00:19:49,206 - [Tom] We're doing something here. 330 00:19:49,206 --> 00:19:51,275 - [Dick] No, no you don't have to do it. 331 00:19:51,275 --> 00:19:55,896 - You guys are so alive together, so electric. - Oh yeah we were electric alright. 332 00:19:55,896 --> 00:19:59,137 But then the wires got really old and we burnt our fucking house down. 333 00:19:59,137 --> 00:20:04,689 - God, your wires aren't old, nobodies house has burned down. 334 00:20:04,689 --> 00:20:06,448 - [Dick] That's really god damned good. 335 00:20:06,448 --> 00:20:09,000 - [Tom] No need to bring Him into it. 336 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:13,586 You can make this recipe right here in the comfort of your home. 337 00:20:13,586 --> 00:20:17,310 Using my latest endeavor. - Ahhh 338 00:20:17,310 --> 00:20:19,551 Look at that handsome devil, huh, on the cover 339 00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:23,310 of another book. And it's an Atheist cook book. 340 00:20:23,310 --> 00:20:25,517 Yes and it is personalized to you. 341 00:20:25,517 --> 00:20:29,827 - [Dick] That's really sweet buddy. Thank you. 342 00:20:29,827 --> 00:20:31,344 - [Tom] Sure. 343 00:20:31,344 --> 00:20:32,724 - [Dick] Should I burnt it now, or wait 344 00:20:32,724 --> 00:20:38,310 till you guys leave. "Claire" 345 00:20:38,310 --> 00:20:41,413 - [Tom] I'm an asshole. - I like the peace, love, and pepper part. 346 00:20:41,413 --> 00:20:44,862 Tomorrow, good question, I was thinking I found these 347 00:20:44,862 --> 00:20:51,551 cute purple dinner napkins, and these little Hi-C juice boxes 348 00:20:51,551 --> 00:20:53,931 and like a shit load of cyanide, and what I thought I'd do is 349 00:20:53,931 --> 00:20:58,275 off myself with the dog and catch a little comet tail out to a different world 350 00:20:58,275 --> 00:21:02,413 a better place, it's a heaven's gate... 351 00:21:02,413 --> 00:21:04,344 I know it's kind of little bit dated but... 352 00:21:04,344 --> 00:21:07,482 - [Jessie] I don't really think suicide jokes are funny. 353 00:21:07,482 --> 00:21:09,689 Well, we're going to stay here until you're back on your feet. 354 00:21:09,689 --> 00:21:12,862 - [Dick] No. - [Tom] Yes. - [Dick] I am fine. 355 00:21:12,862 --> 00:21:17,965 - She's right. - [Dick] I'm fine In fact, I have a plan 356 00:21:17,965 --> 00:21:24,620 A real non suicide plan. 357 00:21:24,620 --> 00:21:26,896 I'm going to go and 358 00:21:26,896 --> 00:21:30,758 do all the things this week that we had planned 359 00:21:30,758 --> 00:21:32,551 for the anniversary celebration 360 00:21:32,551 --> 00:21:35,172 I'm going to go and do those things to show Claire 361 00:21:35,172 --> 00:21:39,137 - [Jessie] To show her what? 362 00:21:39,137 --> 00:21:42,655 - [Dick] I'm ok. 363 00:21:42,655 --> 00:21:49,000 A vision quest, you know, I'm bucia, a little code du sue. 364 00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:52,103 Those crazy fucking Indians would dig a hole, all the way out 365 00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:57,379 in the tribe, vision quest, in the pit, you know? 366 00:21:57,379 --> 00:22:01,034 - Ok, didn't these guys have 367 00:22:01,034 --> 00:22:04,172 medicine man to guide them? - Not always. - [Tom] Here we are. 368 00:22:04,172 --> 00:22:07,965 We could be your medicine men. - Well, I'd be your medicine woman. 369 00:22:07,965 --> 00:22:13,931 - I was really focusing on the part where I was in the hole alone. 370 00:22:13,931 --> 00:22:16,379 - Dick, we're going to stay here, we're going to do this with you. It's fate. 371 00:22:16,379 --> 00:22:18,068 - [Tom] Well let's not go crazy. 372 00:22:18,068 --> 00:22:20,448 - What is on the schedule for tomorrow? 373 00:22:20,448 --> 00:22:25,137 - I'm sure it's some shit. 374 00:22:25,137 --> 00:22:33,862 [thoughtful music] 375 00:22:33,862 --> 00:22:49,034 - Ok, time to wake up. 376 00:22:49,034 --> 00:22:52,793 ♪ And she's everything 377 00:22:52,793 --> 00:22:59,379 I wanted to forget ♪ 378 00:22:59,379 --> 00:23:02,275 Flashing eyelashes ♪ 379 00:23:02,275 --> 00:23:04,344 - [Tom] Well there's your problem right there, 380 00:23:04,344 --> 00:23:05,413 you're looking for meaning at the end 381 00:23:05,413 --> 00:23:08,103 and not in the whole of it. 382 00:23:08,103 --> 00:23:10,862 Ask yourself, do you really need to find a happy ending in all this? 383 00:23:10,862 --> 00:23:12,758 Is that really going to help? 384 00:23:12,758 --> 00:23:17,172 - [Dick] Ah Tommy, when did you become such an asshole? 385 00:23:17,172 --> 00:23:19,965 Jesus Christ. 386 00:23:19,965 --> 00:23:26,655 Claire was here. And now she's not. 387 00:23:26,655 --> 00:23:31,965 Don't look for meaning where there isn't any. 388 00:23:31,965 --> 00:23:36,103 ♪ And it's good just to be bad 389 00:23:36,103 --> 00:23:44,275 Anything but being sad ♪ 390 00:23:44,275 --> 00:23:46,413 Action notes ♪ 391 00:23:46,413 --> 00:23:53,000 [chattering] 392 00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:57,103 [giggling] I think I was fucking around. 393 00:23:57,103 --> 00:24:38,827 [laughing] It's just funny. 394 00:24:38,827 --> 00:24:43,034 [sighs] 395 00:24:43,034 --> 00:24:52,379 - [Jessie] I've always loved you. 396 00:24:52,379 --> 00:24:58,241 It's not like its unmanageable, hmmm? Right? 397 00:24:58,241 --> 00:25:06,655 I love my husband, I love my family 398 00:25:06,655 --> 00:25:14,931 [kissing] 399 00:25:14,931 --> 00:25:23,310 - [Dick] Jessie, no I can't 400 00:25:23,310 --> 00:25:39,965 [sigh] 401 00:25:39,965 --> 00:25:52,034 [sighing] 402 00:25:52,034 --> 00:25:53,965 - [Tom] Do not be a bitch to me! 403 00:25:53,965 --> 00:25:56,965 - [Jessie] Did we finally find a crack in your impervious philosophy of 404 00:25:56,965 --> 00:25:59,827 random, fucking meaninglessness. 405 00:25:59,827 --> 00:26:01,310 - [Tom]I have been more than tolerant of your little 406 00:26:01,310 --> 00:26:03,413 sexual awakening glory hole thing. 407 00:26:03,413 --> 00:26:05,448 - [Jessie] We talked about this. 408 00:26:05,448 --> 00:26:08,758 - We sure as hell never talked about Dick! 409 00:26:08,758 --> 00:26:10,551 - [Dick] Wait, what? 410 00:26:10,551 --> 00:26:12,827 - I'm not going to do this, I'm not going to let you rewrite this, 411 00:26:12,827 --> 00:26:14,413 you don't get to be mad. 412 00:26:14,413 --> 00:26:17,000 - Jess, can I just say, he gets to be a little mad. 413 00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:18,793 - [Tom and Jessie] shut up Dick! 414 00:26:18,793 --> 00:26:20,448 - [Dick] Ok, I'm understand that people are really pissed off right now, 415 00:26:20,448 --> 00:26:24,965 and I get it. All I'm trying to, I just think that maybe 416 00:26:24,965 --> 00:26:28,896 we can get through this, without it being such a big deal. 417 00:26:28,896 --> 00:26:33,034 - [Tom] Oh so your grand opus of self destruction 418 00:26:33,034 --> 00:26:35,827 isn't over yet? 419 00:26:35,827 --> 00:26:38,275 You fucked up your own marriage so you figured hey why not take ours down with you? 420 00:26:38,275 --> 00:26:40,034 You little piece of shit. 421 00:26:40,034 --> 00:26:42,448 - No Tom, all I'm saying is that 422 00:26:42,448 --> 00:26:46,551 yeah, okay, my penis was inside your wife. 423 00:26:46,551 --> 00:26:48,241 [Jessie groans] 424 00:26:48,241 --> 00:26:51,137 so hold, on I'm not finished. But now my penis is not 425 00:26:51,137 --> 00:26:53,448 inside of your wife. 426 00:26:53,448 --> 00:26:56,724 [Jessie groans] What I'm suggesting is.. 427 00:26:56,724 --> 00:26:59,862 we don't try to find meaning 428 00:26:59,862 --> 00:27:02,034 when there isn't any. 429 00:27:02,034 --> 00:27:05,724 Right? 430 00:27:05,724 --> 00:27:10,241 [whack] [groaning] - [Jessie] Wow, Thomas. 431 00:27:10,241 --> 00:27:13,620 - You know what, that's fair. That's a fair move. 432 00:27:13,620 --> 00:27:14,931 [Jessie] Oh my god! 433 00:27:14,931 --> 00:27:21,206 Oh he hit me right at the top of the head. [groaning] 434 00:27:21,206 --> 00:27:27,344 - [Tom] You know what really pisses me off. 435 00:27:27,344 --> 00:27:33,103 You orchestrated this whole thing Jess. 436 00:27:33,103 --> 00:27:35,137 You weren't worried about Dick. 437 00:27:35,137 --> 00:27:40,862 You didn't want to take care of him. You wanted to bone him. 438 00:27:40,862 --> 00:27:42,758 - [Jessie] Oh really, well who's making up stories now, Thomas? 439 00:27:42,758 --> 00:27:44,931 - You had sexual intercourse with the man on the porch. 440 00:27:44,931 --> 00:27:47,517 - [Jessie] Yes that has been very clearly established but 441 00:27:47,517 --> 00:27:52,620 I didn't plan it, I didn't orchestrate Claire leaving Dick 442 00:27:52,620 --> 00:27:54,448 and I certainly didn't cancel the party. 443 00:27:54,448 --> 00:27:56,034 And anyway when we got the email 444 00:27:56,034 --> 00:28:00,862 you were the one who said we should come up. 445 00:28:00,862 --> 00:28:03,068 - [Dick] Wait. What? 446 00:28:03,068 --> 00:28:07,000 - [Jessie] Yes Dick, we got the email. 447 00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:08,862 - Then what the hell are you doing here? 448 00:28:08,862 --> 00:28:12,034 - [Jessie] We thought you should be around friends and we knew 449 00:28:12,034 --> 00:28:14,206 you wouldn't let us if we told you. 450 00:28:14,206 --> 00:28:16,965 But that was his idea. Do you remember that Thomas? 451 00:28:16,965 --> 00:28:20,586 Huh? We've already booked the baby sitter, why don't we just go up? 452 00:28:20,586 --> 00:28:24,068 We'll drink a bunch of wine, we'll hang out with Dick we'll relax. 453 00:28:24,068 --> 00:28:27,241 Fucking revisionist. 454 00:28:27,241 --> 00:28:33,034 You know, I'm not going to apologize for anything. God. 455 00:28:33,034 --> 00:28:36,413 I for twelve years had planned nothing but focused on this family. 456 00:28:36,413 --> 00:28:38,689 [clattering] 457 00:28:38,689 --> 00:28:41,482 I have managed my career. 458 00:28:41,482 --> 00:28:46,724 three children, your career... - [Dick] Okay, time to go! 459 00:28:46,724 --> 00:28:48,793 - What? - [Dick] I love you but you're both 460 00:28:48,793 --> 00:28:51,034 fucking crazy and I need you out of my house. 461 00:28:51,034 --> 00:28:53,793 - Come on Dick! 462 00:28:53,793 --> 00:28:55,206 - No come on Dick, time to go. - [Jessie] We're working through something here, 463 00:28:55,206 --> 00:28:59,793 it's really important and kind of involves you. 464 00:28:59,793 --> 00:29:01,793 - No, doesn't involve me at all. Really doesn't. 465 00:29:01,793 --> 00:29:03,793 - [Tom] Ok brother, it's probably 2:30 in the morning 466 00:29:03,793 --> 00:29:06,137 and we are going to have to drive all the way back to LA. 467 00:29:06,137 --> 00:29:10,310 - [Jessie] It's not safe Dick. 468 00:29:10,310 --> 00:29:13,517 - Okay. You can spend the night. 469 00:29:13,517 --> 00:29:16,862 But you're out of here at seven a.m. - [Tom] That's a tad early. 470 00:29:16,862 --> 00:29:21,827 - [Dick] Seven a.m.! 471 00:29:21,827 --> 00:29:25,482 Good night! 472 00:29:25,482 --> 00:29:29,758 ♪ You told me to be safe but I know 473 00:29:29,758 --> 00:29:33,793 I can't be safe ♪ 474 00:29:33,793 --> 00:29:38,103 [guitar music] ♪ I can't help but to move forward 475 00:29:38,103 --> 00:29:42,137 I can't see what I'm headed toward ♪ 476 00:29:42,137 --> 00:29:46,517 ♪ Trouble in the wind 477 00:29:46,517 --> 00:29:50,586 ♪ I feel it now 478 00:29:50,586 --> 00:29:54,862 all over me again ♪ [duck quacks] 479 00:29:54,862 --> 00:29:59,034 ♪ All over me again 480 00:29:59,034 --> 00:30:03,206 ♪ Trouble like before 481 00:30:03,206 --> 00:30:07,413 ♪ Don't want to hide from 482 00:30:07,413 --> 00:30:11,655 Trouble anymore, No no no ♪ 483 00:30:11,655 --> 00:30:15,724 Trouble anymore ♪ 484 00:30:15,724 --> 00:30:26,137 [car door closes] 485 00:30:26,137 --> 00:30:31,344 Oh no, no no, don't even stop. 486 00:30:31,344 --> 00:30:33,620 Just keep going, keep going. 487 00:30:33,620 --> 00:30:38,862 Oh you crazy bastard. 488 00:30:38,862 --> 00:30:42,620 [clears throat] Hey buddy. 489 00:30:42,620 --> 00:30:44,931 - [Tom] I fixed it. 490 00:30:44,931 --> 00:30:49,103 ♪ You told me what I want 491 00:30:49,103 --> 00:30:53,448 that's not what I want ♪ 492 00:30:53,448 --> 00:30:57,482 ♪ I don't want to have to fake 493 00:30:57,482 --> 00:31:01,586 this I can't fix it while you break this. ♪ 494 00:31:01,586 --> 00:31:05,827 Break it. Trouble in the wind ♪ 495 00:31:05,827 --> 00:31:09,931 [guitar music] 496 00:31:09,931 --> 00:31:16,896 Tennis. 497 00:31:16,896 --> 00:31:18,931 That's better, we're getting there. 498 00:31:18,931 --> 00:31:21,793 You're just shaking hands with the racket. I want you moving. Moving the whole time. 499 00:31:21,793 --> 00:31:27,068 [grunts] 500 00:31:27,068 --> 00:31:30,724 Out. [gasp] 501 00:31:30,724 --> 00:31:32,724 - [Dick] T.O. T.O 502 00:31:32,724 --> 00:31:37,931 - T.O. 503 00:31:37,931 --> 00:31:40,758 It's a beautiful day. - [Dick] Hmmmm 504 00:31:40,758 --> 00:31:45,000 I mean have you ever had a day this good in your life. 505 00:31:45,000 --> 00:31:50,034 Um yeah. 506 00:31:50,034 --> 00:31:53,103 You smoke? - [Dick] No, quit years ago. 507 00:31:53,103 --> 00:31:55,344 - How about this guy? 508 00:31:55,344 --> 00:31:58,827 - [Dick] Oh yeah, yeah peace pipe? - Yeah. - Sure why not. 509 00:31:58,827 --> 00:32:01,620 - Why don't you get on that. - Ok - Just like it looks. 510 00:32:01,620 --> 00:32:05,517 - [Dick] Nice and easy. - Jump right in. 511 00:32:05,517 --> 00:32:06,655 [inhale] 512 00:32:06,655 --> 00:32:10,620 Wow. I get that one. 513 00:32:10,620 --> 00:32:12,310 - Yeah. Good, right? 514 00:32:12,310 --> 00:32:14,310 - Yeah, it's really good, really good. 515 00:32:14,310 --> 00:32:18,551 [lighter flicks] - [Dick] You got the look man. 516 00:32:18,551 --> 00:32:23,724 You're rocking a crazy great look. I love that headband. 517 00:32:23,724 --> 00:32:25,620 You love the headband? - [Dick] I do. 518 00:32:25,620 --> 00:32:29,068 - I'm getting you a headband. I can get you a headband. 519 00:32:29,068 --> 00:32:32,758 You're a broken man. 520 00:32:32,758 --> 00:32:34,931 - Yeah, I mean, it's a little bit of patella. 521 00:32:34,931 --> 00:32:40,103 Meniscus. I know what you're saying. 522 00:32:40,103 --> 00:32:44,931 And you came to me for a lesson. 523 00:32:44,931 --> 00:32:50,620 Dick Romans. 524 00:32:50,620 --> 00:32:53,758 - [Dick] I mean, tennis. 525 00:32:53,758 --> 00:32:55,896 - Yeah. Sure. 526 00:32:55,896 --> 00:32:57,517 - Tennis lesson. 527 00:32:57,517 --> 00:33:02,482 Right. A tennis lesson. [Dick laughs] 528 00:33:02,482 --> 00:33:04,758 There's a little more going on though. Wouldn't you say? 529 00:33:04,758 --> 00:33:08,517 Yep. 530 00:33:08,517 --> 00:33:14,241 Tennis is not just forehands and backhands, right? 531 00:33:14,241 --> 00:33:16,379 I mean it is those things. 532 00:33:16,379 --> 00:33:17,896 - [Dick] Because without those things you know 533 00:33:17,896 --> 00:33:19,896 it's not really even tennis. 534 00:33:19,896 --> 00:33:22,379 - It's not even tennis right. You have to have forehands and backhands. 535 00:33:22,379 --> 00:33:26,586 You have to have spin, lob, you got to have the racket. 536 00:33:26,586 --> 00:33:28,344 - [Dick] There are a lot of things.. 537 00:33:28,344 --> 00:33:30,620 - There are a lot things. That's very well said. 538 00:33:30,620 --> 00:33:32,241 We are having a moment here. This is best friends stuff, 539 00:33:32,241 --> 00:33:36,275 my point is, tennis lessons, life lessons. 540 00:33:36,275 --> 00:33:39,620 Life you only live once. 541 00:33:39,620 --> 00:33:48,172 But tennis, you get to serve twice. 542 00:33:48,172 --> 00:33:49,724 - [Dick] Wow. 543 00:33:49,724 --> 00:33:51,344 - I mean that's the business. 544 00:33:51,344 --> 00:33:55,758 Am I in your head? Cause I feel like I'm in your head. 545 00:33:55,758 --> 00:33:58,827 - [Dick] It doesn't work though if you ace everybody. - Yeah. 546 00:33:58,827 --> 00:34:02,655 - I mean if you're somebody that just constantly aces people you don't need a... 547 00:34:02,655 --> 00:34:07,034 you don't need the second serve. You're winning right off the bat. 548 00:34:07,034 --> 00:34:10,931 You're just a winner. So, it's a good quote. 549 00:34:10,931 --> 00:34:20,448 But it's kind of little bit more of a loser quote. 550 00:34:20,448 --> 00:34:30,827 [guitar music] 551 00:34:30,827 --> 00:34:37,931 ♪ I'm just trying to understand 552 00:34:37,931 --> 00:34:40,931 ♪ Where I jump and where I land ♪ 553 00:34:40,931 --> 00:34:44,896 - Unbelievable. 554 00:34:44,896 --> 00:34:48,758 ♪ When I'm with you 555 00:34:48,758 --> 00:34:53,448 Hey! It's Steve! - Lenny. 556 00:34:53,448 --> 00:34:57,000 - Lenny! I thought we already solved the whole food situation. 557 00:34:57,000 --> 00:35:01,241 - No, we're good. I come in peace. - [Dick] By the way, I gotta tell ya.. 558 00:35:01,241 --> 00:35:04,137 the lasagna, unbelievable. - Well I'm glad you liked it. 559 00:35:04,137 --> 00:35:06,413 - [Dick] I really liked it. 560 00:35:06,413 --> 00:35:09,482 - [Lenny] I made you a dish, here. Sample platter. 561 00:35:09,482 --> 00:35:11,379 I know you're going through a little something 562 00:35:11,379 --> 00:35:13,965 and I figured you could use another good meal. 563 00:35:13,965 --> 00:35:16,517 Looks like things are getting a little worse around here. 564 00:35:16,517 --> 00:35:21,931 You're probably not hip to all the men's fashion for Spring. 565 00:35:21,931 --> 00:35:23,793 This is basically called bracing 566 00:35:23,793 --> 00:35:27,758 It's all over Japan. The kids are wearing neck braces, 567 00:35:27,758 --> 00:35:29,310 like prostetic shoes and different types of hands. 568 00:35:29,310 --> 00:35:30,862 - Ah well. I guess I'm in. 569 00:35:30,862 --> 00:35:33,655 - [Dick] You're on the cutting edge of fashion. 570 00:35:33,655 --> 00:35:38,413 Oh, look at this, unbelievable. Oh, solids! 571 00:35:38,413 --> 00:35:40,413 Bless your heart Lenny! 572 00:35:40,413 --> 00:35:43,310 - Well, good luck Dick! 573 00:35:43,310 --> 00:35:48,379 - [Dick] Good luck to you, or whatever. pHey Lenn? 574 00:35:48,379 --> 00:35:50,965 What are you doing tomorrow? 575 00:35:50,965 --> 00:35:52,517 - [Lenny] What do you mean? 576 00:35:52,517 --> 00:35:56,379 - [Dick] I'm kind of on this bizarre 577 00:35:56,379 --> 00:35:59,551 accidental vision quest, 578 00:35:59,551 --> 00:36:02,034 and I got a wine tasting tomorrow, 579 00:36:02,034 --> 00:36:05,103 and I thought maybe you would want to ... 580 00:36:05,103 --> 00:36:06,931 I don't know. Come with me. 581 00:36:06,931 --> 00:36:08,758 - [Lenny] Oh god, that sounds great. 582 00:36:08,758 --> 00:36:12,482 But I'm booked. I'm catering this big event for a guy. 583 00:36:12,482 --> 00:36:15,724 - Gotcha. No worries. We got it. No big deal. 584 00:36:15,724 --> 00:36:17,793 - His wife died. 585 00:36:17,793 --> 00:36:20,965 - Really? You know some guys have all the luck. 586 00:36:20,965 --> 00:36:23,206 - [Lenny] It was terrible, you know 587 00:36:23,206 --> 00:36:23,896 her face got chopped off by an airplane propeller. 588 00:36:23,896 --> 00:36:27,344 - You're kidding me. 589 00:36:27,344 --> 00:36:30,310 So it's going around? - [Lenny] Yeah. 590 00:36:30,310 --> 00:36:34,517 - So you can, come with me? Or you can't? 591 00:36:34,517 --> 00:36:38,758 Come on! - [Lenny] All right. I'm in. 592 00:36:38,758 --> 00:36:40,137 - [Dick] Yeah! 593 00:36:40,137 --> 00:36:41,172 It'll be fun, I promise. 594 00:36:41,172 --> 00:36:53,758 [guitar music] 595 00:36:53,758 --> 00:36:57,862 ♪ Let's never fall 596 00:36:57,862 --> 00:37:02,965 in love ♪ 597 00:37:02,965 --> 00:37:06,344 ♪ Our hearts can only 598 00:37:06,344 --> 00:37:07,620 - Wow. 599 00:37:07,620 --> 00:37:10,655 Ready to get drunk? 600 00:37:10,655 --> 00:37:13,620 - [Lenny] Hey where's your hat? - My hat? I usually don't wear it in public. 601 00:37:13,620 --> 00:37:16,000 - Why it's a great hat! 602 00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:17,862 Really, you think so? Me too. Claire hates it, she calls it my douchebag hat. 603 00:37:17,862 --> 00:37:19,862 - Oh I don't think it has anything to do with that. 604 00:37:19,862 --> 00:37:23,310 - Oh funny, get in the bus. 605 00:37:23,310 --> 00:37:31,689 ♪ [rap music] 606 00:37:31,689 --> 00:37:34,896 Hey can you turn this up? 607 00:37:34,896 --> 00:37:37,206 [Dick giggles] 608 00:37:37,206 --> 00:37:39,862 You like this song? Yeah, I like it a lot. 609 00:37:39,862 --> 00:37:42,310 Is this your jam? That's cool. 610 00:37:42,310 --> 00:37:44,275 - What? A girl can't like gangster rap? 611 00:37:44,275 --> 00:37:46,206 - No, a girl can like gangster rap. 612 00:37:46,206 --> 00:37:49,000 A girl like you, can't like gangster rap. 613 00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:53,103 [hiss] - Let me blow your mind, are you ready for this? 614 00:37:53,103 --> 00:37:57,103 I used to be in all girl country gangster 615 00:37:57,103 --> 00:37:59,206 rap band. 616 00:37:59,206 --> 00:38:00,862 - [Dick] Bull shit. - Honest. 617 00:38:00,862 --> 00:38:02,724 - You were never were in a country all girl gangster rap band. 618 00:38:02,724 --> 00:38:04,689 - [Lenny] I was. [Dick] No I don't believe you. 619 00:38:04,689 --> 00:38:07,000 I don't even want to hear anymore. - Whatever. 620 00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:09,379 - Just be quiet. No one needs pretty girls spitting lies all over the place. 621 00:38:09,379 --> 00:38:11,206 Give me the name of the band and three tracks right now. 622 00:38:11,206 --> 00:38:13,724 - We were the DLP. Three tracks? 623 00:38:13,724 --> 00:38:17,344 Top That Guy, Two at Once, and Bitches Gotta Eat. 624 00:38:17,344 --> 00:38:19,448 - What did the DLP stand for? 625 00:38:19,448 --> 00:38:22,034 - I don't know you well enough. 626 00:38:22,034 --> 00:38:24,689 - Alright nevermind. - Dick Lovin' Posse. 627 00:38:24,689 --> 00:38:29,689 [laughing] 628 00:38:29,689 --> 00:38:32,103 - [Dick] Really? - [Lenny] Yeah! We were young! 629 00:38:32,103 --> 00:38:33,241 - [Dick] This feels good to me now. 630 00:38:33,241 --> 00:38:34,827 Now I feel not so worried. 631 00:38:34,827 --> 00:38:37,137 Because at first, when you got on the bus you seemed 632 00:38:37,137 --> 00:38:38,310 in a bad mood but now we're going to have fun. 633 00:38:38,310 --> 00:38:41,034 Let's go! Why aren't we drinking yet? 634 00:38:41,034 --> 00:39:01,827 [rap music] ♪ 635 00:39:01,827 --> 00:39:04,482 - [Dick] I'm going to turn this wine into a cocktail. 636 00:39:04,482 --> 00:39:10,310 This is where I do my thing. Now the party is about to start. p- You've lost your mind. 637 00:39:10,310 --> 00:39:11,827 Holy crap. That's awful. 638 00:39:11,827 --> 00:39:36,655 [rap music] ♪ 639 00:39:36,655 --> 00:39:40,758 Are you okay? 640 00:39:40,758 --> 00:39:44,931 - I'm a huge fan. [Dick] Thank you. - I mean I loved your show. 641 00:39:44,931 --> 00:39:49,034 - I just, I love everything about you. 642 00:39:49,034 --> 00:39:58,034 Thank you. Thank you. 643 00:39:58,034 --> 00:40:01,310 What was that? - [Dick] I don't know, we should go outside. 644 00:40:01,310 --> 00:40:02,965 [Jessie] What was that? - I don't know what to tell you. 645 00:40:02,965 --> 00:40:05,827 I think she thinks I'm somebody else. p- Okay I'm going to go. 646 00:40:05,827 --> 00:40:07,965 Thank you! 647 00:40:07,965 --> 00:40:11,586 I didn't want to raise him in Atlanta, and my husband had family out here. 648 00:40:11,586 --> 00:40:14,379 And I thought this seems like a really great place 649 00:40:14,379 --> 00:40:16,275 for a kid to grow up. 650 00:40:16,275 --> 00:40:19,241 - Huh. I didn't know you had a kid. 651 00:40:19,241 --> 00:40:23,655 That's cool. - Stewart. Ten. He's a cool dude. 652 00:40:23,655 --> 00:40:28,758 He's weird but he's cool. - Yeah. 653 00:40:28,758 --> 00:40:30,896 Oh I got to sit my ass down for a second. 654 00:40:30,896 --> 00:40:33,724 - You okay? - Yeah fine. 655 00:40:33,724 --> 00:40:39,586 So what happened to your husband, did he split? p- Not exactly. 656 00:40:39,586 --> 00:40:43,413 I mean he kind of split. He died. - Jesus Christ, I'm sorry. 657 00:40:43,413 --> 00:40:51,379 I'm sorry that was graceless. - It's okay. 658 00:40:51,379 --> 00:40:53,758 Not that face please. 659 00:40:53,758 --> 00:40:57,724 Why does everyone always assume it's such a sad story. 660 00:40:57,724 --> 00:41:02,620 It wasn't a great marriage. He wasn't a great man. 661 00:41:02,620 --> 00:41:06,724 I mean don't get me wrong it's not like I hated him or anything. 662 00:41:06,724 --> 00:41:08,517 He was a good father. 663 00:41:08,517 --> 00:41:12,655 We should of split up way before then. And we would've of but then 664 00:41:12,655 --> 00:41:16,862 he got sick and I spent two years taking care of him. 665 00:41:16,862 --> 00:41:21,103 I couldn't let him do it alone. 666 00:41:21,103 --> 00:41:25,103 And I put my life on hold, it was pretty bad. 667 00:41:25,103 --> 00:41:29,344 It was hard on all of us. 668 00:41:29,344 --> 00:41:36,620 But it's better now. It's just better. 669 00:41:36,620 --> 00:41:40,758 I started this business, and I got a great kid. 670 00:41:40,758 --> 00:41:44,862 I'm living and doing well. 671 00:41:44,862 --> 00:41:46,551 Who knows maybe someday people will stop looking at me 672 00:41:46,551 --> 00:41:53,586 like I'm some poor fragile widow. Like you are right now. 673 00:41:53,586 --> 00:41:54,620 - I am. I'm sorry. 674 00:41:54,620 --> 00:41:58,758 - It's okay. I get it. 675 00:41:58,758 --> 00:42:06,103 Death. It gives us this need to idealize everything and everyone. 676 00:42:06,103 --> 00:42:08,310 But the truth and 677 00:42:08,310 --> 00:42:13,931 I'm talking the real truth here because I've been drinking all day, and screw it. 678 00:42:13,931 --> 00:42:16,137 I'm happier now than I've ever been. 679 00:42:16,137 --> 00:42:32,137 was when my husband was alive. 680 00:42:32,137 --> 00:42:35,655 Does that make me a bad person? 681 00:42:35,655 --> 00:42:43,551 - I think it makes you a fucking fascinating person. 682 00:42:43,551 --> 00:42:47,068 - Okay. [laughs] 683 00:42:47,068 --> 00:42:49,862 So what about you, big tv star? 684 00:42:49,862 --> 00:42:52,896 What happened to you? 685 00:42:52,896 --> 00:42:59,275 [laughs] - [Dick] Indeed. 686 00:42:59,275 --> 00:43:05,586 Claire was my producer and we fell in love. 687 00:43:05,586 --> 00:43:10,586 And it was great. We got hitched. 688 00:43:10,586 --> 00:43:11,724 Then the day before 689 00:43:11,724 --> 00:43:16,413 anniversary week, she split. 690 00:43:16,413 --> 00:43:19,551 She had to be pretty desperate to get out cause 691 00:43:19,551 --> 00:43:23,724 she didn't bother canceling the anniversary week, 692 00:43:23,724 --> 00:43:25,689 and Claire is not like that. 693 00:43:25,689 --> 00:43:29,310 She's detail oriented. You worked with her. 694 00:43:29,310 --> 00:43:32,034 - She's got things in order. 695 00:43:32,034 --> 00:43:37,931 - It's just a fucking week. 696 00:43:37,931 --> 00:43:41,172 All you got to do is hug a few friends, 697 00:43:41,172 --> 00:43:42,965 have some hors d'oeuvres, 698 00:43:42,965 --> 00:43:54,862 pretend you're having a good time. 699 00:43:54,862 --> 00:44:03,827 [guitar music] 700 00:44:03,827 --> 00:44:07,931 - [Lenny] Thanks Bert! - [Bert] You're welcome. 701 00:44:07,931 --> 00:44:11,862 - [Lenny] That was fun. - [Dick] Yeah. What is this? 702 00:44:11,862 --> 00:44:16,000 Pleasure way, 2004? - Oh five. 703 00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:19,724 Oh five! This is the bitching year! - [Lenny] It was Roger's. 704 00:44:19,724 --> 00:44:24,689 Dead husband? Wow he had really good taste in recreational vehicles. 705 00:44:24,689 --> 00:44:27,344 Hey hey, can I ask you something real quick? - [Lenny] Shoot. 706 00:44:27,344 --> 00:44:29,379 - You think that maybe you'd want 707 00:44:29,379 --> 00:44:31,655 to do an interview with me for my new show? 708 00:44:31,655 --> 00:44:33,655 I know its a strange question. - I don't know. 709 00:44:33,655 --> 00:44:35,586 It's no big deal, no pressure, you, me, a microphone. 710 00:44:35,586 --> 00:44:38,482 We shoot the shit for a little while. - Why me? 711 00:44:38,482 --> 00:44:40,620 - Cause I like the stories that you tell. 712 00:44:40,620 --> 00:44:43,413 [laughs] I'm going to have to get back to you on that. 713 00:44:43,413 --> 00:44:46,379 - Alright get back to me. Sure you don't want to go 714 00:44:46,379 --> 00:44:48,758 do some donuts with Bert in the Safeway parking lot? 715 00:44:48,758 --> 00:44:51,344 Come on! - I got to get some sleep. - [Dick] Ok. 716 00:44:51,344 --> 00:44:57,586 See you later. I had fun too! - [Lenny] Alright! 717 00:44:57,586 --> 00:45:01,827 Alright Bert, get my broken ass home. 718 00:45:01,827 --> 00:45:04,724 [guitar music] 719 00:45:04,724 --> 00:45:10,965 ♪ I want to fall 720 00:45:10,965 --> 00:45:15,103 ♪ I want to fall with you 721 00:45:15,103 --> 00:45:19,896 [phone ringing] 722 00:45:19,896 --> 00:45:25,689 - [Dick] Claire? - Dick? 723 00:45:25,689 --> 00:45:27,896 - Hey. Hello? 724 00:45:27,896 --> 00:45:31,896 - Hi, it's me, it's Lenny. 725 00:45:31,896 --> 00:45:35,034 - Oh. Hey! - Hey! 726 00:45:35,034 --> 00:45:38,551 You are an extremely aggressive caterer. 727 00:45:38,551 --> 00:45:42,517 I think I made myself pretty clear that I don't need any more food. 728 00:45:42,517 --> 00:45:44,310 - Um no, that's not it. - [Dick] Ok. 729 00:45:44,310 --> 00:45:48,379 - Um I need to ask you for a favor. 730 00:45:48,379 --> 00:45:53,724 - Is this? A booty call? 731 00:45:53,724 --> 00:45:59,379 - [Lenny] No. - [Dick] You're calling for sexual favors and I'm not sure 732 00:45:59,379 --> 00:46:03,517 I'm actually fine with it. I'm ok. Ask the favor. 733 00:46:03,517 --> 00:46:05,517 - Ok, I hope this isn't too weird, but 734 00:46:05,517 --> 00:46:09,310 I have this big meeting tomorrow. 735 00:46:09,310 --> 00:46:13,206 With a new client. It just came up and I.. 736 00:46:13,206 --> 00:46:15,172 I don't, I tried every... I don't have anyone. 737 00:46:15,172 --> 00:46:17,655 - Do you want me to watch your kid for you? Is that what you're asking? 738 00:46:17,655 --> 00:46:19,034 - Yeah. - [Dick] Done. 739 00:46:19,034 --> 00:46:20,379 It's... Lenny fine. 740 00:46:20,379 --> 00:46:22,724 See, I can watch your kid. Absolutely, no problem. 741 00:46:22,724 --> 00:46:24,620 - Yeah? - [Dick] Yeah. 742 00:46:24,620 --> 00:46:26,827 - Really? - [Dick] Yeah, sure. Yeah kids love me. 743 00:46:26,827 --> 00:46:32,413 - Ok cool. I mean I don't want to you know, interrupt your 744 00:46:32,413 --> 00:46:35,379 unintentional vision quest or whatever. 745 00:46:35,379 --> 00:46:37,068 - [Dick] no, you're not going to mess up anything. 746 00:46:37,068 --> 00:46:42,206 Tomorrow is bunch of crap at the house anyway. 747 00:46:42,206 --> 00:46:45,620 It's various sporting activities around the Roman's property. 748 00:46:45,620 --> 00:46:48,862 Drop the kid off and he'll be my competition. 749 00:46:48,862 --> 00:46:50,206 - Ok. - [Dick] Yeah? 750 00:46:50,206 --> 00:46:52,310 That would be fun I think for him, I don't know. 751 00:46:52,310 --> 00:46:55,413 - [Dick] Is that good? Is it great? Are you relieved that I'm doing that for you. 752 00:46:55,413 --> 00:46:58,448 - [Lenny] I am I really appreciate it. 753 00:46:58,448 --> 00:47:00,620 I have to ask you a question. 754 00:47:00,620 --> 00:47:03,862 Are you going to drink any more tonight? 755 00:47:03,862 --> 00:47:07,586 [Dick] Mmmm, nope. 756 00:47:07,586 --> 00:47:09,586 - [Lenny] Oh good, cool. - [Dick] No.. - [Lenny] Alright. 757 00:47:09,586 --> 00:47:12,413 - I'm probably just going to hit the sack. - [Lenny] Ok. 758 00:47:12,413 --> 00:47:14,965 - [Lenny] Are you sure it's not too weird? 759 00:47:14,965 --> 00:47:18,862 - No, it's super weird but that's what life is, right? 760 00:47:18,862 --> 00:47:22,689 I mean, it's really weird. You don't know me, I could be a psycho. 761 00:47:22,689 --> 00:47:24,827 I could have seventeen bodies buried underneath the house. 762 00:47:24,827 --> 00:47:26,965 - [Lenny] Stop please, this is hard enough for me as it is. 763 00:47:26,965 --> 00:47:31,517 - You stop. I'm joking. I don't have seventeen bodies buried underneath my house. 764 00:47:31,517 --> 00:47:36,793 I have sixteen actually. Your son would be the seventeenth. 765 00:47:36,793 --> 00:47:40,827 You didn't think that's funny at all did you? Ok. 766 00:47:40,827 --> 00:47:44,655 Okay. Come on. You laughed a little bit I know you did. 767 00:47:44,655 --> 00:47:48,068 - [Lenny] Ok, bye. - Ok, bye bye. - Thanks Dick. 768 00:47:48,068 --> 00:47:56,724 - You're welcome Lenny. You're welcome. 769 00:47:56,724 --> 00:47:59,241 - [Dick] What are you doing? - What? 770 00:47:59,241 --> 00:48:00,827 - [Dick] You say goodbye and then people hang up. 771 00:48:00,827 --> 00:48:02,758 - Oh yeah. - [Dick] I'm hanging up now goodbye. 772 00:48:02,758 --> 00:48:30,000 - Ok bye. 773 00:48:30,000 --> 00:48:34,517 - [Dick] Today I talk life, death, and axes with financial hatchet man 774 00:48:34,517 --> 00:48:38,103 Dag Tomaz and debate advanced M theory with physicist slash pop 775 00:48:38,103 --> 00:48:43,068 superstar Ashoki Sen or none of the above. 776 00:48:43,068 --> 00:48:44,310 [applause] 777 00:48:44,310 --> 00:48:49,241 Dag! Welcome to the show. 778 00:48:49,241 --> 00:48:51,758 - [Torsten] And its all about aligning yourself 779 00:48:51,758 --> 00:48:54,137 with what is happening at the moment, always being in the moment. 780 00:48:54,137 --> 00:48:56,206 - [Dick] Mmm Hmmm. Can you help me this Torsten? 781 00:48:56,206 --> 00:48:58,448 - [Torsten] Do you have a problem with it? 782 00:48:58,448 --> 00:48:59,620 - I have a huge problem with it, because while you were talking 783 00:48:59,620 --> 00:49:01,827 I was drifting off thinking about my laundry. 784 00:49:01,827 --> 00:49:04,931 - [Torsten] Where did you go? - To the dry cleaner. 785 00:49:04,931 --> 00:49:06,689 Was that a sexual relationship? - We were intimate briefly. 786 00:49:06,689 --> 00:49:08,724 - You just outed Marina Abramovich. 787 00:49:08,724 --> 00:49:11,000 It was like going to Baskin Robbins and having a small sample. 788 00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:13,103 - [Dick] It was just a small taste. - It was a taste of something. 789 00:49:13,103 --> 00:49:15,586 - Do you know what I do when I got to Baskin Robbins and I have a taste? 790 00:49:15,586 --> 00:49:17,655 I say I'll have the blueberry cheesecake surprise and they give me 791 00:49:17,655 --> 00:49:23,862 a little bit of it and I go [gags] ah God! That's disgusting. 792 00:49:23,862 --> 00:49:28,206 You serve this shit?! And then I leave. They hate that. 793 00:49:28,206 --> 00:49:32,275 Hey listen, talk to me about what the hells going on 794 00:49:32,275 --> 00:49:34,689 between you and Michio? 795 00:49:34,689 --> 00:49:37,068 - I mean he's the Dane Cook of astrophysicists. A sell out. 796 00:49:37,068 --> 00:49:40,344 - See its stuff like that, that's gets us into trouble. What are you doing? 797 00:49:40,344 --> 00:49:44,793 - Good Lord! - Fight the real enemy! - [laughing] And or none of the above. 798 00:49:44,793 --> 00:49:48,827 We're never coming back on tv again, we're done. 799 00:49:48,827 --> 00:49:50,896 So you were the guy with the prairie dog? - Pretty much. 800 00:49:50,896 --> 00:49:52,068 - Cause I have my own prairie dog, I don't know if you know this. 801 00:49:52,068 --> 00:49:54,724 - Oh, you do? 802 00:49:54,724 --> 00:49:57,310 Yeah, live via Skype, from Las Vegas, pornography super star Prairie Dog! 803 00:49:57,310 --> 00:49:59,551 - PD! - What's up Dick! 804 00:49:59,551 --> 00:50:01,482 - What's up buddy see what I got on set? - what the hell is that thing? 805 00:50:01,482 --> 00:50:05,586 - That's a prairie dog, that's a real prairie dog and you're a sex prairie dog. 806 00:50:05,586 --> 00:50:07,793 [laughing] 807 00:50:07,793 --> 00:50:13,965 [speaking Japanese] 808 00:50:13,965 --> 00:50:17,931 - Thank you. - Thank you. 809 00:50:17,931 --> 00:50:22,068 [typing] 810 00:50:22,068 --> 00:50:32,275 [click] 811 00:50:32,275 --> 00:50:34,551 In the American 812 00:50:34,551 --> 00:50:38,689 propaganda war Dick, you, you are a domestic terrorist. 813 00:50:38,689 --> 00:50:42,827 - We'll be back! Irving Petty. - And we're clear! - Thank god. 814 00:50:42,827 --> 00:50:44,896 [clears throat] Not right now. Get Claire on the phone for me please. 815 00:50:44,896 --> 00:50:47,034 Claire, why are there no writers on the goddamn floor right now? 816 00:50:47,034 --> 00:50:51,241 Cause is it your fucking show or is it my fucking show? Cause I'm not... 817 00:50:51,241 --> 00:50:55,551 that's a whole other thing now. - Fifteen seconds - Oh goddamn it!! 818 00:50:55,551 --> 00:50:59,655 - What are charging for this piece of shit? Thirty seven fifty? 819 00:50:59,655 --> 00:51:01,689 U. S. Dollars? Yeah, because I'm done with you. 820 00:51:01,689 --> 00:51:03,862 Get the fuck off my show, get him off. 821 00:51:03,862 --> 00:51:07,896 I'm your guest. You invited me. - You in fact are not my guest. 822 00:51:07,896 --> 00:51:12,034 So please find an exit. I'm done. Craig? He's done. 823 00:51:12,034 --> 00:51:13,827 Dick you can't light that in here. 824 00:51:13,827 --> 00:51:16,827 Don't tell me what I can and cannot light in my own goddamn show. 825 00:51:16,827 --> 00:51:20,482 This is my show! 826 00:51:20,482 --> 00:51:22,965 [ripping] 827 00:51:22,965 --> 00:51:25,000 - What are you doing? - Want to see what I can light? I'll show you what I can light. 828 00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:28,655 Alright light this bitch on fire. - Now you're a book burner, congratulations. 829 00:51:28,655 --> 00:51:32,620 - [Dick] [yelling] It's burning! That's it, your book is on fire. 830 00:51:32,620 --> 00:51:36,586 Don't you dare, don't you dare do it. I started the fire! 831 00:51:36,586 --> 00:51:48,034 I started the fire! I started the fire! 832 00:51:48,034 --> 00:52:00,517 [guitar music] 833 00:52:00,517 --> 00:52:03,827 [guitar music] 834 00:52:03,827 --> 00:52:07,793 ♪ In a pale yellow 835 00:52:07,793 --> 00:52:09,068 [quacking] 836 00:52:09,068 --> 00:52:13,724 ♪ yellow pit 837 00:52:13,724 --> 00:52:15,275 ♪ in my mind 838 00:52:15,275 --> 00:52:17,103 - [Dick] Come on, time to wake up 839 00:52:17,103 --> 00:52:21,103 we got people coming over. 840 00:52:21,103 --> 00:52:24,379 - [Lenny] This is an adventure right? So call me if you need anything. 841 00:52:24,379 --> 00:52:26,068 - [Dick] Good morning everybody! 842 00:52:26,068 --> 00:52:30,379 - [Lenny] Hey douchebag. - [Dick] Hey how's it going champ? 843 00:52:30,379 --> 00:52:34,689 Oh Stewart, sorry, Stewart. - [Lenny] Stewart is a little... 844 00:52:34,689 --> 00:52:38,689 I think you guys are going to get along just fine. 845 00:52:38,689 --> 00:52:42,724 - Oh yeah we're going to be great. - [Lenny] Yeah. You good? 846 00:52:42,724 --> 00:52:47,034 I'll see you tonight. - [Stewart] Okay. 847 00:52:47,034 --> 00:52:51,137 - [Lenny] Thanks. You know. [sniffs] 848 00:52:51,137 --> 00:52:55,275 Alright, have fun! - [Stewart] Bye mom! 849 00:52:55,275 --> 00:52:59,344 What sort of stuff are you into Stewart?P- I don't know, do you have apfrisbee? 850 00:52:59,344 --> 00:53:03,862 - Do I have a frisbee? No I don't have a frisbee but they got ultimate frisbee on tv. 851 00:53:03,862 --> 00:53:07,344 We could watch that. - [Stewart] They don't have ultimate frisbee. 852 00:53:07,344 --> 00:53:09,655 - [Dick] Oh yeah you don't think so? 853 00:53:09,655 --> 00:53:12,551 I bet, what if I showed you? Would you believe me then? 854 00:53:12,551 --> 00:53:15,206 How about boxing? - [Stewart] Yeah. 855 00:53:15,206 --> 00:53:16,931 - [Dick] You like boxing? Alright let's do it. 856 00:53:16,931 --> 00:53:20,758 Right, right, [punching] 857 00:53:20,758 --> 00:53:23,103 Good, right, right, right. 858 00:53:23,103 --> 00:53:24,862 [whack] 859 00:53:24,862 --> 00:53:29,793 Didn't see that coming? Always got to look... [punch] Argh! 860 00:53:29,793 --> 00:53:46,517 [guitar music] 861 00:53:46,517 --> 00:53:50,655 - [Doctor] What the hell did you do? - [Dick] We were boxing. 862 00:53:50,655 --> 00:53:52,724 - It's a common mistake with this kind of knee injury. 863 00:53:52,724 --> 00:53:54,827 Everybody goes back to boxing a little too soon. 864 00:53:54,827 --> 00:53:59,034 Fucking moron. [Stewart] The cat looks like a jerk. 865 00:53:59,034 --> 00:54:03,172 - [Doctor] What? - [Stewart] It looks mean. 866 00:54:03,172 --> 00:54:05,275 - [Doctor] Tugger? - [Dick] Tugger? 867 00:54:05,275 --> 00:54:07,379 [Stewart] Tugger looks like an asshole. 868 00:54:07,379 --> 00:54:11,586 [laughing] Well what do you know about cats? 869 00:54:11,586 --> 00:54:13,586 - I know what they look like when they're going to scratch you. 870 00:54:13,586 --> 00:54:15,482 - [Doctor] That cat would lay down his goddamn life for me. 871 00:54:15,482 --> 00:54:19,413 - [Stewart] I don't think so. 872 00:54:19,413 --> 00:54:20,689 - [Doctor] You little shit. - [Dick] Okay, no, no, no. 873 00:54:20,689 --> 00:54:23,965 It's best for him to be in the waiting room. 874 00:54:23,965 --> 00:54:28,137 Let's go Stewart, go. I'll be out there in a second bud. 875 00:54:28,137 --> 00:54:32,206 - Somebody should have a few words with that kid. I mean you can't just insult a man's cat. 876 00:54:32,206 --> 00:54:36,413 - You're on the knee, Doc. - Are you all out of your pussy cream? 877 00:54:36,413 --> 00:54:38,862 - I could probably use another tube. 878 00:54:38,862 --> 00:54:40,965 - Yeah I thought maybe you could. I'm going to need to see you in a couple days. 879 00:54:40,965 --> 00:54:43,206 - [Dick] Really? - [Doctor] Yeah, really. - [Dick] Oh shit. 880 00:54:43,206 --> 00:54:57,241 [upbeat music] 881 00:54:57,241 --> 00:55:01,275 So do you think my mom is cute or something? 882 00:55:01,275 --> 00:55:05,482 - [Dick] Ummmm. 883 00:55:05,482 --> 00:55:07,793 I have never thought about it, 884 00:55:07,793 --> 00:55:15,517 whether she was cute or not. [clears throat] 885 00:55:15,517 --> 00:55:18,344 Why do you think she's cute? - [Stewart] No, she's my mom. 886 00:55:18,344 --> 00:55:22,689 - [Dick] Right. Yeah, of course. 887 00:55:22,689 --> 00:55:26,448 It's a stupid question. I don't know why I asked that question. 888 00:55:26,448 --> 00:55:29,551 - [Stewart] Mom's a pretty good cook but she cuts herself a lot. 889 00:55:29,551 --> 00:55:33,103 There's probably a lot of blood in that food that she gave you. 890 00:55:33,103 --> 00:55:35,413 - Really? - [Stewart] Yeah really. 891 00:55:35,413 --> 00:55:38,965 - [Dick] Thank you for the heads up. That's disgusting. 892 00:55:38,965 --> 00:55:43,172 - [Stewart] Yeah. - Glad I have the information. - Yeah. 893 00:55:43,172 --> 00:55:46,482 - [Dick] What is your deal Stewart? Hmm? 894 00:55:46,482 --> 00:55:50,896 I never saw my doctor get so pissed off. And I got you tell you, 895 00:55:50,896 --> 00:55:52,896 I like pissing him off. 896 00:55:52,896 --> 00:55:58,241 - [Stewart] You know every day is like the same. 897 00:55:58,241 --> 00:56:01,517 It makes me mad. 898 00:56:01,517 --> 00:56:04,689 [grunts] 899 00:56:04,689 --> 00:56:06,275 - [Dick] You what the bad news is? - [Stewart] What? 900 00:56:06,275 --> 00:56:10,551 That feeling doesn't ever go away. 901 00:56:10,551 --> 00:56:13,517 You know what the good news is? 902 00:56:13,517 --> 00:56:15,551 - [Stewart] No. 903 00:56:15,551 --> 00:56:17,517 - [Dick] In a few years, you'll be old enough you can drink. 904 00:56:17,517 --> 00:56:22,586 - How is that going to help? - [Dick] Trust me. It helps. 905 00:56:22,586 --> 00:56:24,655 Have you figured out this maze yet? 906 00:56:24,655 --> 00:56:26,862 - [Stewart] No. 907 00:56:26,862 --> 00:56:29,275 - [Dick] This is the hardest maze I've ever done in my life. 908 00:56:29,275 --> 00:56:32,448 Yeah, you know what, can I talk to you for a second? 909 00:56:32,448 --> 00:56:33,724 Watch this. Watch and learn. 910 00:56:33,724 --> 00:56:36,206 - [Waitress] Hi! - [Dick] Hi how are you? 911 00:56:36,206 --> 00:56:37,793 - Great how are you? 912 00:56:37,793 --> 00:56:40,068 - Oh we're great. We're working on this mazes over here, 913 00:56:40,068 --> 00:56:42,241 and we're having some trouble getting out. 914 00:56:42,241 --> 00:56:44,448 - [Waitress] What do you mean? 915 00:56:44,448 --> 00:56:46,965 - Well we wondered if you maybe had some sort answer key 916 00:56:46,965 --> 00:56:48,586 or maybe a cheat sheet we could look at and figure out how to 917 00:56:48,586 --> 00:56:50,655 get out of the maze. 918 00:56:50,655 --> 00:56:53,931 - Yeah, I don't know. [laughs] - [Dick] Has anyone ever solved the maze? 919 00:56:53,931 --> 00:56:55,655 - [Waitress] I don't know. 920 00:56:55,655 --> 00:57:00,068 You don't know. Jump and down and say yeah we got out! 921 00:57:00,068 --> 00:57:02,965 Yeah, I don't know. 922 00:57:02,965 --> 00:57:05,793 Do you just keep saying I don't know? I mean you can't hand out broken mazes to kids 923 00:57:05,793 --> 00:57:08,758 cause then they wind up heart broken and looking like this kid looks right now. 924 00:57:08,758 --> 00:57:12,965 Look at him, he's wrecked. You did that. It's not right. 925 00:57:12,965 --> 00:57:16,137 It's not right. 926 00:57:16,137 --> 00:57:18,275 - [Waitress] Do you want some coffee? 927 00:57:18,275 --> 00:57:20,137 - [Dick] No, don't need a coffee. 928 00:57:20,137 --> 00:57:21,586 Be great to have a maze we can get out of. 929 00:57:21,586 --> 00:57:24,448 - [Waitress] Yeah I bet. So can you clear up those crutches? 930 00:57:24,448 --> 00:57:31,793 Cause they're blocking the walkway. 931 00:57:31,793 --> 00:57:35,896 - [Stewart] Asshole. - [Dick] Thank you. 932 00:57:35,896 --> 00:57:41,517 You talking about her right? 933 00:57:41,517 --> 00:57:43,137 Up high. 934 00:57:43,137 --> 00:57:49,310 ♪ You only need me when you're drunk ♪ 935 00:57:49,310 --> 00:57:52,689 ♪ You only claim me when push comes to shove ♪ 936 00:57:52,689 --> 00:57:55,344 [quacking] 937 00:57:55,344 --> 00:57:59,793 Hey, hey listen hold on a second. 938 00:57:59,793 --> 00:58:02,551 Tell me what you have Neil give me some good news 939 00:58:02,551 --> 00:58:04,551 because I swear to God, I'm completely in the dark. 940 00:58:04,551 --> 00:58:08,620 - Yeah Dickie listen, I spoke to Claire's lawyers. 941 00:58:08,620 --> 00:58:11,413 She doesn't want to see you, doesn't want to talk to you, 942 00:58:11,413 --> 00:58:13,862 she doesn't want arbitration, doesn't want mediation, and... 943 00:58:13,862 --> 00:58:15,482 - [Dick] Jesus Christ 944 00:58:15,482 --> 00:58:18,379 - And uh, Dickie, there's worse news. 945 00:58:18,379 --> 00:58:21,413 - Oh great, as long as there's worse news, let's hear it. 946 00:58:21,413 --> 00:58:23,448 - [Neil] Normally I wouldn't bring this up, 947 00:58:23,448 --> 00:58:27,137 but I read your horoscope this morning. And this is literally, 948 00:58:27,137 --> 00:58:32,379 the worst month in twelve years for you to be getting a divorce. 949 00:58:32,379 --> 00:58:36,379 And I'm not talking about the horoscopes in the back of some bullshit LA times, Dickie. 950 00:58:36,379 --> 00:58:38,862 This is the guy that Ronald Regan used. 951 00:58:38,862 --> 00:58:41,448 - [Dick] Oh fantastic - [Neil] Imagine that, okay? 952 00:58:41,448 --> 00:58:45,689 - [Neil] Exclusive club, members only invited. 953 00:58:45,689 --> 00:58:50,000 This is the worst time for you to be thinking about getting a divorce. 954 00:58:50,000 --> 00:58:53,172 - [Dick] I don't have a lot of control over that Neil. 955 00:58:53,172 --> 00:58:55,448 Maybe buy her something, something meaningful. 956 00:58:55,448 --> 00:58:58,655 I use Etsy, are you familiar with Etsy? This woman, 957 00:58:58,655 --> 00:59:04,620 this lady makes personalized baskets, handmade they're wonderful. 958 00:59:04,620 --> 00:59:06,862 Maybe you should think about getting Claire that? You know? 959 00:59:06,862 --> 00:59:08,724 It'll show her that you're trying. 960 00:59:08,724 --> 00:59:12,689 - [Dick] Um, I don't even know what to say to that. 961 00:59:12,689 --> 00:59:16,793 How do I pull that off exactly when she doesn't want to have contact with me? 962 00:59:16,793 --> 00:59:20,896 Now you're telling me that I should get her a fruit basket. 963 00:59:20,896 --> 00:59:25,103 Based on Ronald Reagan's horoscope. [Neil] They're not just baskets Dickie, they're 964 00:59:25,103 --> 00:59:30,000 customized to the individual. - [Dick] Let me ask you something. Is this the top 965 00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:33,275 This is the good stuff? - [Neil] I'm sorry Dickie okay? 966 00:59:33,275 --> 00:59:37,620 This is hard on all of us pal. I mean you and Claire are that couple. 967 00:59:37,620 --> 00:59:41,793 If you two can't make it work than what hope do me and Julie have? 968 00:59:41,793 --> 00:59:45,896 I'm fucked. You know that? - [Dick] Yeah I am too. I gotta go. 969 00:59:45,896 --> 00:59:54,241 Goodbye. 970 00:59:54,241 --> 01:00:02,517 - [Dick] Shhh. He's sleeping. 971 01:00:02,517 --> 01:00:07,517 Wow. He's out? - [Dick] Out. 972 01:00:07,517 --> 01:00:09,310 They like each other. Come on. 973 01:00:09,310 --> 01:00:11,275 - [Lenny] So how'd it go? 974 01:00:11,275 --> 01:00:15,586 - It went really well. You know what I did? p[Lenny] What? 975 01:00:15,586 --> 01:00:17,344 I had him bake cookies for you. - You guys baked cookies? 976 01:00:17,344 --> 01:00:20,034 Yeah you got to taste one of those. 977 01:00:20,034 --> 01:00:24,068 They are horrible. Right? 978 01:00:24,068 --> 01:00:25,413 - [Lenny] What? Oh my god. 979 01:00:25,413 --> 01:00:28,275 - [Dick] That's the worst cookie. 980 01:00:28,275 --> 01:00:32,000 There's a urine kind of taste to them. I don't know how you get that in a cookie. 981 01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:33,655 - Why did you make me eat that? 982 01:00:33,655 --> 01:00:36,103 - Your son made those. He takes after you.p- [Lenny] No. 983 01:00:36,103 --> 01:00:40,827 - No, he doesn't. Cause you actually cook really well. How did it go today? 984 01:00:40,827 --> 01:00:44,793 - Good, yeah, it was a tasting 985 01:00:44,793 --> 01:00:47,413 for a big country club wedding and I nailed it. 986 01:00:47,413 --> 01:00:56,482 - [Dick] Course you did. - Yeah. 987 01:00:56,482 --> 01:00:59,000 That it might be fun to do that thing. 988 01:00:59,000 --> 01:01:01,413 You know the interview thing that you were talking about. 989 01:01:01,413 --> 01:01:03,379 - [Dick] Oh yeah. - [Lenny] Yeah. - [Dick] Yeah 990 01:01:03,379 --> 01:01:05,344 - [Lenny] You know, if you were serious. - [Dick] Dead serious. 991 01:01:05,344 --> 01:01:09,448 - Let me know. - Okay, I'll let you know right now 992 01:01:09,448 --> 01:01:11,068 You mean you want to do it right now? 993 01:01:11,068 --> 01:01:14,620 Yeah, let's do it right now. 994 01:01:14,620 --> 01:01:19,206 Ok, he's drunk. He's been drinking all day, he's not going anywhere. 995 01:01:19,206 --> 01:01:21,068 Come on, it'll be a blast. - [Lenny] Okay. 996 01:01:21,068 --> 01:01:26,068 - [Dick] Yeah? - [Lenny] Yeah. 997 01:01:26,068 --> 01:01:37,068 [clears throat] 998 01:01:37,068 --> 01:01:38,689 Today. 999 01:01:38,689 --> 01:01:41,724 Is April 11th, could you state your name for the record please? 1000 01:01:41,724 --> 01:01:46,482 Lenny Jane Wright. - Lenny Jane Wright. 1001 01:01:46,482 --> 01:01:50,103 What should we talk about today? We could talk about boxing, 1002 01:01:50,103 --> 01:01:53,689 we could talk about cats. We could talk about cat boxes. We could talk about.. 1003 01:01:53,689 --> 01:01:58,620 Only children, single mothers milk of human kindness, the DLP? 1004 01:01:58,620 --> 01:02:04,344 Coincidence. - Let's talk about coincidence. 1005 01:02:04,344 --> 01:02:08,517 I was almost an Icelander. 1006 01:02:08,517 --> 01:02:11,103 That might be my favorite sentence I have ever heard. 1007 01:02:11,103 --> 01:02:17,896 [laughs] When I was in the fifth grade, um.. 1008 01:02:17,896 --> 01:02:20,034 my father was in between jobs 1009 01:02:20,034 --> 01:02:23,379 and he worked with computers and satellites. 1010 01:02:23,379 --> 01:02:25,965 And he got this job offer in Iceland. 1011 01:02:25,965 --> 01:02:30,896 So he hired me and my brother and an Icelandic tutor. 1012 01:02:30,896 --> 01:02:34,655 And we spent the entire summer 1013 01:02:34,655 --> 01:02:37,862 three days a week learning Icelandic with Johannes 1014 01:02:37,862 --> 01:02:39,448 - [Dick] Ah Johannes. 1015 01:02:39,448 --> 01:02:42,931 Anyway, so he was a college student on break touring America 1016 01:02:42,931 --> 01:02:45,551 and he became part of the family. 1017 01:02:45,551 --> 01:02:47,896 He put part of his trip on hold so that he could stay 1018 01:02:47,896 --> 01:02:50,862 and teach us and get us ready. 1019 01:02:50,862 --> 01:02:54,310 Because Georgia to Iceland that is a huge adjustment. 1020 01:02:54,310 --> 01:02:56,275 - [Dick] That's a big jump. - Yeah. 1021 01:02:56,275 --> 01:02:58,827 Anyway my father, he goes over there 1022 01:02:58,827 --> 01:03:00,758 to look for a house and to get us into school 1023 01:03:00,758 --> 01:03:03,724 and when he comes back 1024 01:03:03,724 --> 01:03:07,655 he shows us this super 8 mm film that he shot 1025 01:03:07,655 --> 01:03:10,482 of this street festival in Reykjavik. 1026 01:03:10,482 --> 01:03:14,344 And there is no sound, so Johannes is talking us through it 1027 01:03:14,344 --> 01:03:15,482 and he's telling us all 1028 01:03:15,482 --> 01:03:20,931 about about the city, and the food. 1029 01:03:20,931 --> 01:03:23,758 and the clothing and all of a sudden 1030 01:03:23,758 --> 01:03:27,103 he just starts crying. 1031 01:03:27,103 --> 01:03:30,586 Nobody knows what is going on. 1032 01:03:30,586 --> 01:03:35,034 And he just gets up and he leaves. 1033 01:03:35,034 --> 01:03:38,172 And we don't hear from him for like a week. 1034 01:03:38,172 --> 01:03:46,827 And one night my dad gets this call and Johannes went back to Iceland. 1035 01:03:46,827 --> 01:03:51,931 Now um, the reason was because, 1036 01:03:51,931 --> 01:03:53,758 the film my dad showed us. 1037 01:03:53,758 --> 01:03:56,206 of the street festival, 1038 01:03:56,206 --> 01:03:58,103 in the crowd 1039 01:03:58,103 --> 01:04:01,448 Johannes saw his fiancè 1040 01:04:01,448 --> 01:04:10,275 making out with his best friend. 1041 01:04:10,275 --> 01:04:14,827 - [Dick] Ouch. - [Lenny] Yeah. 1042 01:04:14,827 --> 01:04:21,275 That's my first memory of anything completely true. 1043 01:04:21,275 --> 01:04:26,413 It was proven right there in front of all us. 1044 01:04:26,413 --> 01:04:30,103 It was real. 1045 01:04:30,103 --> 01:04:34,241 Just like your final show. 1046 01:04:34,241 --> 01:04:35,793 The one that never aired. 1047 01:04:35,793 --> 01:04:39,827 - [Dick] Truthfully, there wasn't much to air. 1048 01:04:39,827 --> 01:04:42,068 - [Lenny] January 13, 2012. 1049 01:04:42,068 --> 01:04:44,517 - [Dick] You've done your homework. 1050 01:04:44,517 --> 01:04:49,931 - The day that your show died. 1051 01:04:49,931 --> 01:04:54,689 was the same day that my husband died. 1052 01:04:54,689 --> 01:05:01,724 January 13, 2012. 1053 01:05:01,724 --> 01:05:06,862 It can't just be coincidence. 1054 01:05:06,862 --> 01:05:10,517 It's the truth. 1055 01:05:10,517 --> 01:05:13,310 And it's not good. 1056 01:05:13,310 --> 01:05:20,931 It's not beautiful. It's just true. 1057 01:05:20,931 --> 01:05:22,862 I feel like 1058 01:05:22,862 --> 01:05:26,896 life keeps showing me this over and over again. 1059 01:05:26,896 --> 01:05:31,000 I don't know what it means. 1060 01:05:31,000 --> 01:05:34,586 Maybe that's why we're here. 1061 01:05:34,586 --> 01:05:47,000 To figure it out. 1062 01:05:47,000 --> 01:05:50,137 [door shuts] 1063 01:05:50,137 --> 01:05:53,344 You like it? - [Stewart] Sort of. 1064 01:05:53,344 --> 01:05:58,517 - [Dick] Not a hundred percent? - [Stewart] Yeah. 1065 01:05:58,517 --> 01:06:06,620 [footsteps] 1066 01:06:06,620 --> 01:06:08,758 [door shuts] 1067 01:06:08,758 --> 01:06:12,655 - [Lenny] You spoil him. - [Dick] He's a good kid. 1068 01:06:12,655 --> 01:06:15,137 - Yeah. 1069 01:06:15,137 --> 01:06:21,620 - Thanks. - Thanks yeah. [laughs] 1070 01:06:21,620 --> 01:06:24,413 - [Dick] Oh give me a hug. [nervous laugh] 1071 01:06:24,413 --> 01:06:29,206 Thanks. - [Lenny] Yeah.. 1072 01:06:29,206 --> 01:06:34,000 oh, okay... hey! Wow. 1073 01:06:34,000 --> 01:06:40,137 - [Dick] I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 1074 01:06:40,137 --> 01:06:44,965 [engine starts] You know what? I'm sorry. 1075 01:06:44,965 --> 01:06:47,068 - Lenny? 1076 01:06:47,068 --> 01:06:52,275 Ok, it's really narrow, you want to watch out going back. - [Lenny] I got it! 1077 01:06:52,275 --> 01:06:59,793 - [Lenny] [groans] - It's all right, take it slow through that it's really narrow. 1078 01:06:59,793 --> 01:07:06,724 [sad music] 1079 01:07:06,724 --> 01:07:10,620 ♪ Our hearts 1080 01:07:10,620 --> 01:07:16,034 can only betray us ♪ 1081 01:07:16,034 --> 01:07:20,689 ♪ I can't afford to care 1082 01:07:20,689 --> 01:07:23,724 [quacking] 1083 01:07:23,724 --> 01:07:26,827 What? - [Operator] Please hold for Mr. Young. 1084 01:07:26,827 --> 01:07:28,862 - [Jaron] Are you ignoring me? - [Dick] No I'm sorry. 1085 01:07:28,862 --> 01:07:31,482 - No, no I'm sorry for even bothering to do this. 1086 01:07:31,482 --> 01:07:33,137 Did you get any of my texts? 1087 01:07:33,137 --> 01:07:36,137 - [Dick] Yeah I got your texts, I miss you too. 1088 01:07:36,137 --> 01:07:38,793 I got a lot going right on now Jaron. 1089 01:07:38,793 --> 01:07:41,620 - [Jaron] Shit. I got a lot going on too. That's why I need to see you. 1090 01:07:41,620 --> 01:07:43,689 I need to break bread with my favorite egghead. 1091 01:07:43,689 --> 01:07:45,965 - [Dick] I'm kind of on lock down now buddy. It's complicated. 1092 01:07:45,965 --> 01:07:48,655 Life is complicated. Hey man, 1093 01:07:48,655 --> 01:07:50,896 have you read the trades lately? Do you have any idea 1094 01:07:50,896 --> 01:07:53,068 what's going on in this industry that you are a part of? 1095 01:07:53,068 --> 01:07:54,862 If not, let me explain it to you Dick. 1096 01:07:54,862 --> 01:07:58,482 As of a few days ago, I'm officially president of the network. 1097 01:07:58,482 --> 01:08:00,758 - [Dick] Hey Congratulations! Good for you. 1098 01:08:00,758 --> 01:08:03,620 - [Jaron] Yes, yes, and now I'm on the phone with you. 1099 01:08:03,620 --> 01:08:05,620 Should I be flattered? 1100 01:08:05,620 --> 01:08:07,586 Yes, mother fucker, you should be flattered. 1101 01:08:07,586 --> 01:08:08,793 In fact you should be on an airplane heading to Los Angeles 1102 01:08:08,793 --> 01:08:10,655 to come sit down with me. 1103 01:08:10,655 --> 01:08:12,689 - [Dick] Oh boy that sounds tempting. 1104 01:08:12,689 --> 01:08:14,724 - [Jaron] Good I'm sending you a ticket. 1105 01:08:14,724 --> 01:08:16,724 - [Dick] Oh no, now you can't, cause my mailbox got wiped out in a twister 1106 01:08:16,724 --> 01:08:18,206 - [Jaron] An e-ticket stupid. 1107 01:08:18,206 --> 01:08:20,275 - [Dick] What do you want to see me for? That bridge is burned. 1108 01:08:20,275 --> 01:08:22,310 - [Jaron] The bridge is mine now, I'm the one who says 1109 01:08:22,310 --> 01:08:23,655 if it's it burnt or not. Okay? 1110 01:08:23,655 --> 01:08:25,241 Right now I say the bridge is not burned. 1111 01:08:25,241 --> 01:08:28,793 What don't you understand about me being president? 1112 01:08:28,793 --> 01:08:31,724 So come on man, stop playing around. You owe me a one on one. 1113 01:08:31,724 --> 01:08:33,724 I need to see your face. 1114 01:08:33,724 --> 01:08:35,896 - [Dick] Then Skype me and we'll have a little conversation over Skype. 1115 01:08:35,896 --> 01:08:38,862 - [Jaron] Hey, hey, don't nobody use Skype no more. 1116 01:08:38,862 --> 01:08:41,586 Why do you got to be so obstinate from Jump Street, Dick? 1117 01:08:41,586 --> 01:08:43,827 - [Dick] I'm not being obstinate. 1118 01:08:43,827 --> 01:08:46,000 - No, no, see this right here, this behavior right here 1119 01:08:46,000 --> 01:08:49,206 is why people passionately don't like you. 1120 01:08:49,206 --> 01:08:52,448 okay, why people like me have to fight for dumb asses like you. 1121 01:08:52,448 --> 01:08:53,931 - [Dick] But I didn't ask you to fight for me. 1122 01:08:53,931 --> 01:08:57,000 - Shhh. Stop it. Okay. 1123 01:08:57,000 --> 01:08:59,620 Cause you wouldn't know what is good for you if it was blowing you. 1124 01:08:59,620 --> 01:09:02,310 I do. I know what's good for you. 1125 01:09:02,310 --> 01:09:04,793 This is what love feels like. 1126 01:09:04,793 --> 01:09:07,689 Bring your ass down to L.A. 1127 01:09:07,689 --> 01:09:09,931 - [Dick] Listen, congratulations on the promotion. 1128 01:09:09,931 --> 01:09:11,655 - Thank you. 1129 01:09:11,655 --> 01:09:13,827 And here's my advice, when they push you out of the window 1130 01:09:13,827 --> 01:09:15,793 which they're going to do. 1131 01:09:15,793 --> 01:09:16,793 Try to aim for the bodies of your predecessors, 1132 01:09:16,793 --> 01:09:19,620 that'll soften the blow. 1133 01:09:19,620 --> 01:09:23,379 - I'll keep that in mind. Now my advice to you. 1134 01:09:23,379 --> 01:09:25,965 When your friend who also happens to be the President 1135 01:09:25,965 --> 01:09:31,034 of a network tells you that this is your last chance 1136 01:09:31,034 --> 01:09:34,137 he's not fucking around. 1137 01:09:34,137 --> 01:09:38,793 I will see you Thursday at eleven a.m. 1138 01:09:38,793 --> 01:10:03,344 [guitar music] 1139 01:10:03,344 --> 01:10:05,206 ♪ Everybody wants their cigarettes 1140 01:10:05,206 --> 01:10:07,724 ♪ everybody lies and everyone 1141 01:10:07,724 --> 01:10:09,655 ♪ gets in front of me 1142 01:10:09,655 --> 01:10:21,689 ♪ in front of me 1143 01:10:21,689 --> 01:10:25,206 - Dick. - Lenny. 1144 01:10:25,206 --> 01:10:29,068 I think we should probably talk about yesterday 1145 01:10:29,068 --> 01:10:34,758 Can I just, for a real quick... 1146 01:10:34,758 --> 01:10:39,344 ...about yesterday and the kiss. The attempted kiss. 1147 01:10:39,344 --> 01:10:42,241 It was all my fault. 1148 01:10:42,241 --> 01:10:47,137 It was a compulsiveness and or impulsiveness on my part 1149 01:10:47,137 --> 01:10:50,206 and we're not even that. It was an attraction, in the moment. 1150 01:10:50,206 --> 01:10:51,931 I was feeling an attraction towards you 1151 01:10:51,931 --> 01:10:55,931 but I shouldn't have 1152 01:10:55,931 --> 01:11:02,034 I shouldn't have done that. 1153 01:11:02,034 --> 01:11:03,827 I never had to apologize 1154 01:11:03,827 --> 01:11:08,965 for trying to kiss somebody before so it's a little weird. 1155 01:11:08,965 --> 01:11:10,931 - [Lenny] Weird? - [Dick] It's not about the kiss though 1156 01:11:10,931 --> 01:11:17,000 I mean it is, and I'm sorry I don't want to take away from that 1157 01:11:17,000 --> 01:11:19,965 I have been giving this a lot of thought and what I've come up with is 1158 01:11:19,965 --> 01:11:25,068 I'm having legitimate feelings for you 1159 01:11:25,068 --> 01:11:28,655 - [Lenny] Legitimate feelings? 1160 01:11:28,655 --> 01:11:32,413 - [Dick] Romantic, love feelings. 1161 01:11:32,413 --> 01:11:36,413 - [Lenny] No. - [Dick] No, no, you got to hear me out. 1162 01:11:36,413 --> 01:11:38,413 Please Lenny 1163 01:11:38,413 --> 01:11:40,827 - [Lenny] No, Dick, this is bull shit. 1164 01:11:40,827 --> 01:11:42,965 - No its not bullshit. 1165 01:11:42,965 --> 01:11:44,724 - Oh yeah, it is, it's bull shit. I don't need to hear it. 1166 01:11:44,724 --> 01:11:53,241 [door slams] 1167 01:11:53,241 --> 01:11:57,896 What makes you think you have legitimate love feelings? 1168 01:11:57,896 --> 01:12:01,517 Everything. You. 1169 01:12:01,517 --> 01:12:05,137 We're in all girl gangster rap band 1170 01:12:05,137 --> 01:12:11,517 and so many things. You like my hat. 1171 01:12:11,517 --> 01:12:13,620 Your son is super cool. Stewart. And he's always saying asshole. 1172 01:12:13,620 --> 01:12:16,931 and I think that's funny. And I really, I like your food. 1173 01:12:16,931 --> 01:12:20,827 And I love the way that you tell stories and Lenny I think 1174 01:12:20,827 --> 01:12:22,206 that you and I are are funny and sad in the same way. 1175 01:12:22,206 --> 01:12:27,551 - [Lenny] Okay. [door slams] 1176 01:12:27,551 --> 01:12:30,344 What's your problem? Which one? 1177 01:12:30,344 --> 01:12:33,241 No jokes asshole. I'm trying to raise a kid here, 1178 01:12:33,241 --> 01:12:35,482 I'm trying to keep a business afloat. 1179 01:12:35,482 --> 01:12:38,655 You think you're going to knock on my door 1180 01:12:38,655 --> 01:12:43,862 and sweep me off my feet. Because I said I liked your hat? 1181 01:12:43,862 --> 01:12:45,482 Or am I just some twitchy blonde that is going 1182 01:12:45,482 --> 01:12:48,241 to jump into your arms because after three days 1183 01:12:48,241 --> 01:12:52,137 you think you have romantic love feelings. 1184 01:12:52,137 --> 01:12:57,965 Your wife just left you. Grow the fuck up Romans. 1185 01:12:57,965 --> 01:13:00,172 I don't need this particularly headache in my life right now. 1186 01:13:00,172 --> 01:13:04,206 You're not going to complete me. 1187 01:13:04,206 --> 01:13:06,793 [door slams] 1188 01:13:06,793 --> 01:13:13,344 Oh god. 1189 01:13:13,344 --> 01:13:35,034 [door shuts] [exhales] 1190 01:13:35,034 --> 01:13:38,137 It's fine.. it's fine. 1191 01:13:38,137 --> 01:13:46,827 [engine starts] 1192 01:13:46,827 --> 01:13:59,758 [guitar music] 1193 01:13:59,758 --> 01:14:04,482 ♪ I'm going to hell 1194 01:14:04,482 --> 01:14:10,000 ♪ There's nothing to do 1195 01:14:10,000 --> 01:14:15,103 ♪ So I'm going to say my prayers ♪ 1196 01:14:15,103 --> 01:14:20,172 ♪ and drink my liquor too 1197 01:14:20,172 --> 01:14:25,310 ♪ I feel all inept 1198 01:14:25,310 --> 01:14:30,413 ♪ I'll be the one in white 1199 01:14:30,413 --> 01:14:36,034 ♪ grinning like a fool 1200 01:14:36,034 --> 01:14:41,137 ♪ and to see my wife 1201 01:14:41,137 --> 01:14:46,103 ♪ that I held your heart 1202 01:14:46,103 --> 01:14:51,586 ♪ I thought I knew you well 1203 01:14:51,586 --> 01:15:00,931 [barking] 1204 01:15:00,931 --> 01:15:03,620 I love you 1205 01:15:03,620 --> 01:15:06,655 I love you too 1206 01:15:06,655 --> 01:15:14,137 Thank you 1207 01:15:14,137 --> 01:15:15,965 [ticking] 1208 01:15:15,965 --> 01:15:18,689 - [Dick] That's a great painting 1209 01:15:18,689 --> 01:15:22,862 - There's a crazy story behind that painting. p- Oh yeah? 1210 01:15:22,862 --> 01:15:31,068 [fast tense music] 1211 01:15:31,068 --> 01:15:33,206 - [Mick] What? - [Dick] Are you going to tell me the story? 1212 01:15:33,206 --> 01:15:34,655 - Do you want to hear it? - Ok. 1213 01:15:34,655 --> 01:15:38,000 - I was in Costa Rica and I was on a bus that broke down 1214 01:15:38,000 --> 01:15:40,034 right outside of [speaks Spanish] 1215 01:15:40,034 --> 01:15:42,862 so this chick, she wanders off the bus 1216 01:15:42,862 --> 01:15:45,448 I think to get some fresh air, stretch her legs. 1217 01:15:45,448 --> 01:15:47,724 She steps right into a fox trap. 1218 01:15:47,724 --> 01:15:51,758 You know your brother, man, I just go into hero mode. 1219 01:15:51,758 --> 01:15:53,758 I didn't do anything medical or that great 1220 01:15:53,758 --> 01:15:56,551 I just fashioned her a tourniquet from some cocoa bolo branches. 1221 01:15:56,551 --> 01:15:59,344 Sprinkled water on her lips, - [Dick] Kept her hydrated. 1222 01:15:59,344 --> 01:16:01,965 - [Mick] I let her use my ipod 1223 01:16:01,965 --> 01:16:03,413 Because I think that music has a really calming soothing effect 1224 01:16:03,413 --> 01:16:04,793 on people. There were tracks that I were working on 1225 01:16:04,793 --> 01:16:07,000 they weren't mastered so I was a first a little.. 1226 01:16:07,000 --> 01:16:09,034 She didn't seem to mind too much. 1227 01:16:09,034 --> 01:16:11,275 She was screaming pretty loud. I don't even know if she heard the music. 1228 01:16:11,275 --> 01:16:14,068 After she got out of the hospital, she invited me to stay with her. 1229 01:16:14,068 --> 01:16:17,586 Which was super cool you know, she had this rad little place on the beach 1230 01:16:17,586 --> 01:16:18,896 You would have really dug it. We just lived, man and hung out. 1231 01:16:18,896 --> 01:16:23,275 And I made music. 1232 01:16:23,275 --> 01:16:27,310 And she painted, we laughed, and we made love every day. 1233 01:16:27,310 --> 01:16:30,620 Mostly in the mouth because I couldn't stand to look at her 1234 01:16:30,620 --> 01:16:31,862 from the waist down because it was really tough 1235 01:16:31,862 --> 01:16:33,000 her leg was so disgusting. 1236 01:16:33,000 --> 01:16:34,275 To me, it's life 1237 01:16:34,275 --> 01:16:37,034 It's sort of wobbly and unpredictable 1238 01:16:37,034 --> 01:16:38,931 but you have to embrace it. 1239 01:16:38,931 --> 01:16:40,724 Before I spilt I stole that painting. 1240 01:16:40,724 --> 01:16:43,137 [Dick grunts] 1241 01:16:43,137 --> 01:16:46,620 So was next for you? Didn't you have this sort of deal going down 1242 01:16:46,620 --> 01:16:49,310 - [Dick] At the network maybe, who cares, it's probably just a run around, it doesn't matter. 1243 01:16:49,310 --> 01:16:52,862 - [Mick] No it does, you have to stay positive with this kind of thing. 1244 01:16:52,862 --> 01:16:55,896 - [Dick] Do you have to really? Staying positive can help you? 1245 01:16:55,896 --> 01:16:58,068 - I think it would be great, you know change of scenery for you, 1246 01:16:58,068 --> 01:17:00,482 come out to L.A., kind of boost your energy a little bit. 1247 01:17:00,482 --> 01:17:02,068 LA is great for that what would be cool 1248 01:17:02,068 --> 01:17:04,896 is you'd be here for the birth too 1249 01:17:04,896 --> 01:17:06,689 - [Dick] Birth? Of what? 1250 01:17:06,689 --> 01:17:12,793 - [Mick] Baby's due in early September. 1251 01:17:12,793 --> 01:17:17,034 - [Dick] What are... I'm just not sure what the fuck you're talking about man. 1252 01:17:17,034 --> 01:17:18,103 - [Mick] Lydia is pregnant. 1253 01:17:18,103 --> 01:17:19,965 - [Dick] Oh. 1254 01:17:19,965 --> 01:17:21,965 Who's Lydia? 1255 01:17:21,965 --> 01:17:24,689 [Mick] Lydia is my lady. 1256 01:17:24,689 --> 01:17:26,379 And she's pregnant with your baby. That's what you tell me right now, 1257 01:17:26,379 --> 01:17:28,862 that you're going to have a baby in a couple months. 1258 01:17:28,862 --> 01:17:33,379 That's it. This is the first time I'm hearing about this Mick. 1259 01:17:33,379 --> 01:17:35,482 - [Mick] I thought I told you. 1260 01:17:35,482 --> 01:17:36,655 - [Dick] Dude! 1261 01:17:36,655 --> 01:17:40,517 Come here, really? 1262 01:17:40,517 --> 01:17:41,827 - [Mick] Yeah. Surprised you. 1263 01:17:41,827 --> 01:17:46,655 - [Dick] It's beautiful man, it's beautiful. 1264 01:17:46,655 --> 01:17:48,103 And crazy and funny. 1265 01:17:48,103 --> 01:17:52,655 And sad. 1266 01:17:52,655 --> 01:17:54,620 - [Mick] Why sad? 1267 01:17:54,620 --> 01:17:56,793 I don't know. I don't even know why I said it. 1268 01:17:56,793 --> 01:18:00,517 I really don't 1269 01:18:00,517 --> 01:18:02,275 - [Mick] cause I know what you mean. 1270 01:18:02,275 --> 01:18:05,000 - [Dick] It's weird right? 1271 01:18:05,000 --> 01:18:09,896 It is a little sad. 1272 01:18:09,896 --> 01:18:18,379 [electronic music] 1273 01:18:18,379 --> 01:18:22,413 - [Dick] You know what have been really sweet is if I was 1274 01:18:22,413 --> 01:18:24,689 good enough husband to get one of those mugs 1275 01:18:24,689 --> 01:18:28,241 that says world's greatest husband. 1276 01:18:28,241 --> 01:18:30,172 - [Mick] I got seven Grammys. 1277 01:18:30,172 --> 01:18:33,655 - [Dick] Seven Grammys? - [Mick] So what. 1278 01:18:33,655 --> 01:18:37,551 - [Dick] So what? 1279 01:18:37,551 --> 01:18:43,172 - [Mick] I tell you so what, it feels great. 1280 01:18:43,172 --> 01:18:45,310 - [Dick] It's not about the mugs, 1281 01:18:45,310 --> 01:18:46,931 I don't care about the mugs. 1282 01:18:46,931 --> 01:18:50,034 I'm lost. I'm stuck. 1283 01:18:50,034 --> 01:18:55,137 - [Mick] I'm like in a maze. 1284 01:18:55,137 --> 01:18:58,344 I was in Glastonbury for a little 1285 01:18:58,344 --> 01:19:01,103 it was a little festival, there's was I party I wound up at 1286 01:19:01,103 --> 01:19:04,551 over at Annie Lennox's castle, and she has this hedge maze. 1287 01:19:04,551 --> 01:19:06,482 It's one of these traditional old fashioned 1288 01:19:06,482 --> 01:19:09,482 it was real, there I was in the middle of this hedge maze 1289 01:19:09,482 --> 01:19:12,103 and I'm not doing too well. 1290 01:19:12,103 --> 01:19:14,310 I kind of stop, and I plant myself 1291 01:19:14,310 --> 01:19:15,448 because I don't want get any further in. 1292 01:19:15,448 --> 01:19:17,793 Anyway, here comes Annie Lennox 1293 01:19:17,793 --> 01:19:21,965 and she grabs my hand and looks me directly in the eyes 1294 01:19:21,965 --> 01:19:23,793 she said put your hand on the maze wall 1295 01:19:23,793 --> 01:19:27,965 and you leave it there. 1296 01:19:27,965 --> 01:19:30,172 As long as you have your hand on the wall and keep moving, 1297 01:19:30,172 --> 01:19:35,172 you'll find your way out. 1298 01:19:35,172 --> 01:19:37,379 Oh man. It was amazing. 1299 01:19:37,379 --> 01:19:41,310 - [Dick] So you made it out of the maze? 1300 01:19:41,310 --> 01:19:45,896 - [Mick] No, I don't believe I did. 1301 01:19:45,896 --> 01:19:48,689 [sigh] 1302 01:19:48,689 --> 01:20:03,655 - [Dick] I think it might be time for bed. 1303 01:20:03,655 --> 01:20:05,724 [ding] 1304 01:20:05,724 --> 01:20:08,862 - [Dick] Look they might be using Jaron to lure me down here so they can 1305 01:20:08,862 --> 01:20:11,689 take turns throwing cinder blocks at me. If things get ugly 1306 01:20:11,689 --> 01:20:17,551 I want you to start kicking some throats. 1307 01:20:17,551 --> 01:20:25,517 Oh oof. 1308 01:20:25,517 --> 01:20:33,896 [faint rock music] 1309 01:20:33,896 --> 01:20:38,137 By chance do you have one of those mini scissors, the travel size? 1310 01:20:38,137 --> 01:20:44,344 I don't want to pull this. Lose a button. 1311 01:20:44,344 --> 01:20:50,482 No? 1312 01:20:50,482 --> 01:21:05,517 [spits] 1313 01:21:05,517 --> 01:21:09,448 Gentleman, Mr. Young is ready for you. 1314 01:21:09,448 --> 01:21:11,551 - [Jaron] Where is he? There's my.. 1315 01:21:11,551 --> 01:21:14,000 What the hell? - [Dick] I know. 1316 01:21:14,000 --> 01:21:16,000 - what you Robo Cop, you Steve Austin? 1317 01:21:16,000 --> 01:21:19,724 You got like a fake eye and shit. What happened to you? 1318 01:21:19,724 --> 01:21:21,586 - [Dick] You think that's bad you should have seen the bear I strangled. 1319 01:21:21,586 --> 01:21:24,448 - [Jaron] In the mountains? - [Dick] Yeah big old black bear. 1320 01:21:24,448 --> 01:21:26,206 - Oh you said it was a black bear. You stupid... 1321 01:21:26,206 --> 01:21:29,000 You're strangling gummy bears. 1322 01:21:29,000 --> 01:21:32,862 You got a belly and shit. Alright you guys, Harvard, Columbia, Wharton, 1323 01:21:32,862 --> 01:21:35,068 Columbia, Wharton, 1324 01:21:35,068 --> 01:21:39,068 meet Dick Romans and his man, Neil something. 1325 01:21:39,068 --> 01:21:40,862 - [Caroline] It's Caroline. - 1326 01:21:40,862 --> 01:21:43,655 - Nice to meet you. - Really great to meet you. 1327 01:21:43,655 --> 01:21:45,103 - Oh, okay 1328 01:21:45,103 --> 01:21:46,931 - [Jaron] Well listen man, this is what happens when you're good 1329 01:21:46,931 --> 01:21:48,793 when you stay in Los Angeles, you could keep your head out of your ass, 1330 01:21:48,793 --> 01:21:51,275 and frankly 1331 01:21:51,275 --> 01:21:55,000 don't set shit on fire. [laughing] 1332 01:21:55,000 --> 01:21:59,137 - [Dick] Well let me be the first one to say that the chair fits you. 1333 01:21:59,137 --> 01:22:01,344 - [Jaron]Yeah? - [Dick] Yeah. 1334 01:22:01,344 --> 01:22:03,275 - [Jaron] Thank you brother - [Dick] Congratulations 1335 01:22:03,275 --> 01:22:09,034 I only have one question. 1336 01:22:09,034 --> 01:22:11,517 And that is what the fuck am I doing here? 1337 01:22:11,517 --> 01:22:14,827 [laughing] This brings back bad memories. 1338 01:22:14,827 --> 01:22:20,137 [laughing] 1339 01:22:20,137 --> 01:22:25,310 I got your show. We've got your show. 1340 01:22:25,310 --> 01:22:28,172 We've got your shit. It's huge. 1341 01:22:28,172 --> 01:22:30,034 This is the show that your momma popped you out of the belly for. 1342 01:22:30,034 --> 01:22:33,000 You're home. 1343 01:22:33,000 --> 01:22:37,137 And your safe. Your boy's president. 1344 01:22:37,137 --> 01:22:38,862 Can I get my pitch on. 1345 01:22:38,862 --> 01:22:40,862 - [Dick] Sure. 1346 01:22:40,862 --> 01:22:44,206 You remember we used to talk about the info-tainment shows of the seventies? 1347 01:22:44,206 --> 01:22:46,931 Real People, That's Incredible, even 60 Minutes right? 1348 01:22:46,931 --> 01:22:50,344 You know they interviewed people on a quest to find a real America. 1349 01:22:50,344 --> 01:22:55,724 On our show, our quest is to find the real Dick Romans. 1350 01:22:55,724 --> 01:22:57,344 Okay? 1351 01:22:57,344 --> 01:23:00,310 It's all about you. 1352 01:23:00,310 --> 01:23:02,827 Alright this is your chance to shout from the rooftop, push the envelope, show the world 1353 01:23:02,827 --> 01:23:05,137 who you truly are, show them the things that you like... 1354 01:23:05,137 --> 01:23:08,724 [inspirational music] 1355 01:23:08,724 --> 01:23:11,724 - [Neil] What is that? - [Dick] What? - [Neil] The look on your face? 1356 01:23:11,724 --> 01:23:13,965 What is that? - [Dick] I'm thinking. It's a lot to process. 1357 01:23:13,965 --> 01:23:16,758 - [Neil] Yeah well process saying yes, because that happens only one in million 1358 01:23:16,758 --> 01:23:19,724 this is a new beginning for you Dickie, you need this. 1359 01:23:19,724 --> 01:23:21,758 - [Dick] Yeah, how do you know it's not a dead end? 1360 01:23:21,758 --> 01:23:24,000 - [Neil] It's not a dead end. We got a lot of work to do, 1361 01:23:24,000 --> 01:23:27,206 I got to get you complete control. I'm going to send a lot of emails right now, 1362 01:23:27,206 --> 01:23:31,034 have her start draft up the paperwork. This is really exciting stuff Dickie. 1363 01:23:31,034 --> 01:23:34,620 - [Dick] What's the matter with me? 1364 01:23:34,620 --> 01:23:36,206 Why I am here? 1365 01:23:36,206 --> 01:23:41,448 - [Neil] Why are you here? You're starting over. 1366 01:23:41,448 --> 01:23:46,034 - [Dick] I don't want to start over. 1367 01:23:46,034 --> 01:23:47,793 Is Claire in Los Angeles? 1368 01:23:47,793 --> 01:23:50,344 - [Neil] Yeah but she's not going to talk to you. 1369 01:23:50,344 --> 01:23:51,241 I don't need her to talk to me. 1370 01:23:51,241 --> 01:23:53,103 I just want her to sit down. 1371 01:23:53,103 --> 01:23:58,310 Could you do that for me? 1372 01:23:58,310 --> 01:24:04,448 - [Neil] I can try. 1373 01:24:04,448 --> 01:24:12,034 Yeah. 1374 01:24:12,034 --> 01:24:24,620 [Dick] Let's go this way. 1375 01:24:24,620 --> 01:24:34,379 [gentle music] 1376 01:24:34,379 --> 01:24:49,551 [waves gently crashing] 1377 01:24:49,551 --> 01:24:57,724 [silverware clattering] [seagulls calling] 1378 01:24:57,724 --> 01:25:10,206 [footsteps] 1379 01:25:10,206 --> 01:25:22,793 [clears throat] 1380 01:25:22,793 --> 01:25:50,931 [Claire] Okay, can I go now? 1381 01:25:50,931 --> 01:26:04,482 Okay, let's do it. 1382 01:26:04,482 --> 01:26:11,724 [rustling] 1383 01:26:11,724 --> 01:26:29,448 - [Dick] What's today? - [Claire] Fourteenth. 1384 01:26:29,448 --> 01:26:43,344 - [Dick] Happy anniversary. 1385 01:26:43,344 --> 01:26:52,137 I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. 1386 01:26:52,137 --> 01:26:54,655 I loved you with everything that I had 1387 01:26:54,655 --> 01:27:23,655 and I'm just starting to understand that I didn't have very much. 1388 01:27:23,655 --> 01:27:38,586 [guitar music] 1389 01:27:38,586 --> 01:27:44,517 ♪ Keeping secrets softly ♪ 1390 01:27:44,517 --> 01:27:48,586 ♪ spoken love to linger 1391 01:27:48,586 --> 01:27:51,206 [knocking] 1392 01:27:51,206 --> 01:27:54,034 ♪ This is golden 1393 01:27:54,034 --> 01:27:56,724 ♪ help me break this 1394 01:27:56,724 --> 01:27:59,000 - Dick? - Lenny. 1395 01:27:59,000 --> 01:28:05,241 - Hi. - Hi. 1396 01:28:05,241 --> 01:28:10,413 - I'm sorry for disturbing you, I just had a really quick question that I wanted to ask. 1397 01:28:10,413 --> 01:28:16,241 - [Lenny] Could I say something first? - [Dick] Sure. 1398 01:28:16,241 --> 01:28:20,172 - It's just that 1399 01:28:20,172 --> 01:28:23,379 you know, last time you came by 1400 01:28:23,379 --> 01:28:26,827 I couldn't do that right then. Okay? 1401 01:28:26,827 --> 01:28:31,827 My mind couldn't do that. 1402 01:28:31,827 --> 01:28:35,137 I just couldn't process the idea of a romantic gesture 1403 01:28:35,137 --> 01:28:36,931 from you 1404 01:28:36,931 --> 01:28:38,586 or anybody, or nobody 1405 01:28:38,586 --> 01:28:42,724 You know what I mean? - [Dick] I do. 1406 01:28:42,724 --> 01:28:48,931 - The idea of being kissed 1407 01:28:48,931 --> 01:28:51,034 It just felt so wrong 1408 01:28:51,034 --> 01:28:56,137 With all the unhappiness 1409 01:28:56,137 --> 01:28:57,931 death and the guilt. 1410 01:28:57,931 --> 01:28:59,931 But I turned all that, I shut it off 1411 01:28:59,931 --> 01:29:04,206 all that stuff 1412 01:29:04,206 --> 01:29:06,275 You started fiddling with all those knobs 1413 01:29:06,275 --> 01:29:10,344 and it really just kind of pissed me off. 1414 01:29:10,344 --> 01:29:13,724 Does any of this make any sense? - [Dick] Total sense. 1415 01:29:13,724 --> 01:29:17,137 Okay. 1416 01:29:17,137 --> 01:29:25,241 I've been giving it a lot of thought. 1417 01:29:25,241 --> 01:29:31,137 I think that we could be good friends - [Dick] Yeah. 1418 01:29:31,137 --> 01:29:36,827 and if we're good friends then who knows what. - [Dick] Who knows? 1419 01:29:36,827 --> 01:29:39,931 I think you're a good man. 1420 01:29:39,931 --> 01:29:42,620 - [Dick] Thank you. 1421 01:29:42,620 --> 01:29:47,724 - [Lenny] I like you. - [Dick] I like you too. 1422 01:29:47,724 --> 01:29:54,931 [laughing] 1423 01:29:54,931 --> 01:29:59,827 Was there something you wanted to say? 1424 01:29:59,827 --> 01:30:03,413 - [Dick] Oh, I just joined up with the fire patrol 1425 01:30:03,413 --> 01:30:06,241 and was just making sure that your brush was cut back to the legal standard 1426 01:30:06,241 --> 01:30:08,379 and you're doing fine. - [Lenny] Thank you. 1427 01:30:08,379 --> 01:30:12,931 Carry on ma'am, your brush is... - [Lenny] Just tell me. 1428 01:30:12,931 --> 01:30:17,068 - [Dick] No, I don't think I can. Probably better if I don't. 1429 01:30:17,068 --> 01:30:19,586 - [Lenny] Speak. 1430 01:30:19,586 --> 01:30:22,655 - [Dick] You ever consider selling the RV? 1431 01:30:22,655 --> 01:30:28,586 To me. [laughing] 1432 01:30:28,586 --> 01:30:30,931 - [Lenny] It's not for sale. - [Dick] Okay, I was just checking. 1433 01:30:30,931 --> 01:30:34,103 Of course it's not for sale. Ok yeah. 1434 01:30:34,103 --> 01:30:39,068 I was just checking. I know it's weird. But thanks though. 1435 01:30:39,068 --> 01:30:42,827 We're going to be in touch in soon right? 1436 01:30:42,827 --> 01:30:47,724 We'll go on one of our famous wine tasting expeditions. 1437 01:30:47,724 --> 01:30:49,620 - [Lenny] Dick? 1438 01:30:49,620 --> 01:30:53,206 - [Dick] Yep? 1439 01:30:53,206 --> 01:30:56,724 You could borrow it. 1440 01:30:56,724 --> 01:30:58,172 - [Dick] I could borrow it. 1441 01:30:58,172 --> 01:31:02,000 [Lenny] Yeah. 1442 01:31:02,000 --> 01:31:27,827 [adventurous music] 1443 01:31:27,827 --> 01:31:29,103 Alright. 1444 01:31:29,103 --> 01:31:38,137 Ready to go? 1445 01:31:38,137 --> 01:31:43,827 [guitar music] 1446 01:31:43,827 --> 01:31:48,931 ♪ I'm living on a chance 1447 01:31:48,931 --> 01:31:53,896 ♪ The one embrace romance 1448 01:31:53,896 --> 01:31:59,689 ♪ I'm standing in the sun 1449 01:31:59,689 --> 01:32:04,448 ♪ Waiting for it to come - [Dick] Ah dammit. 1450 01:32:04,448 --> 01:32:08,241 ♪ I won't let go of love 1451 01:32:08,241 --> 01:32:10,586 ♪ till this life 1452 01:32:10,586 --> 01:32:18,068 ♪ I been dreaming of is mine 1453 01:32:18,068 --> 01:32:25,103 ♪ I've dreamed it a hundred times ♪ 1454 01:32:25,103 --> 01:32:36,034 [guitar music] 1455 01:32:36,034 --> 01:32:41,413 ♪ I'm sailing into the deep 1456 01:32:41,413 --> 01:32:46,068 ♪ I'm holding onto the keys 1457 01:32:46,068 --> 01:32:51,172 ♪ could you be around 1458 01:32:51,172 --> 01:32:54,344 ♪ look what I found 1459 01:32:54,344 --> 01:32:58,689 ♪ I won't let go of love 1460 01:32:58,689 --> 01:33:02,862 ♪ till this life 1461 01:33:02,862 --> 01:33:07,068 ♪ I been dreaming of is mine 1462 01:33:07,068 --> 01:33:31,103 ♪ I've dreamed it a hundred times ♪ 1463 01:33:31,103 --> 01:33:36,137 ♪ I won't let go of love 1464 01:33:36,137 --> 01:33:40,310 ♪ till this life 1465 01:33:40,310 --> 01:33:44,482 ♪ I been dreaming of is mine 1466 01:33:44,482 --> 01:33:50,103 ♪ I've dreamed it a hundred times ♪ 1467 01:33:50,103 --> 01:33:58,344 ♪ No I won't let go of love 1468 01:33:58,344 --> 01:34:03,344 ♪ Till this life I've been dreaming of is mine ♪ 1469 01:34:03,344 --> 01:34:09,482 ♪ I've dreamed it a hundred times ♪ 1470 01:34:09,482 --> 01:34:31,482 [upbeat music] 1471 01:34:31,482 --> 01:34:35,275 ♪ I want to play with fire 1472 01:34:35,275 --> 01:34:39,379 ♪ I want to get burned 1473 01:34:39,379 --> 01:34:42,827 ♪ I want to make the same mistakes♪ 1474 01:34:42,827 --> 01:34:47,344 ♪ I'm too old to learn 1475 01:34:47,344 --> 01:34:50,241 ♪ I want a lay down with you 1476 01:34:50,241 --> 01:34:54,275 ♪ I want to make you laugh 1477 01:34:54,275 --> 01:34:57,344 ♪ I want to sound good to you 1478 01:34:57,344 --> 01:34:59,724 ♪ I want to make you proud 1479 01:34:59,724 --> 01:35:03,965 ♪ because every time you move upon me ♪ 1480 01:35:03,965 --> 01:35:07,413 ♪ I can only catch my breath 1481 01:35:07,413 --> 01:35:10,103 ♪ I don't care where I'm going ♪ 1482 01:35:10,103 --> 01:35:26,413 ♪ long as you come with 1483 01:35:26,413 --> 01:35:30,413 ♪ I want to play with fire 1484 01:35:30,413 --> 01:35:34,137 ♪ I want to get burned 1485 01:35:34,137 --> 01:35:37,310 ♪ I want to make the same mistakes ♪ 1486 01:35:37,310 --> 01:35:41,310 ♪ I'm too dumb to learn 1487 01:35:41,310 --> 01:35:44,827 ♪ I want a lay down with you 1488 01:35:44,827 --> 01:35:48,551 ♪ I want to make you laugh 1489 01:35:48,551 --> 01:35:51,793 ♪ I want to sound good to you 1490 01:35:51,793 --> 01:35:54,206 ♪ I want to make you proud 1491 01:35:54,206 --> 01:35:57,103 ♪ Because everytime you move upon me ♪ 1492 01:35:57,103 --> 01:36:02,103 ♪ I can only catch my breath 1493 01:36:02,103 --> 01:36:04,448 ♪ And I don't care where I'm going ♪ 1494 01:36:04,448 --> 01:36:16,827 ♪ As long you come with 1495 01:36:16,827 --> 01:36:20,241 ♪ Every time you move upon me 1496 01:36:20,241 --> 01:36:23,689 ♪ I can only catch my breath 1497 01:36:23,689 --> 01:36:26,103 ♪ And I don't care where I'm going ♪ 1498 01:36:26,103 --> 01:36:31,241 ♪ As long as you come with 1499 01:36:31,241 --> 01:36:34,482 ♪ Every time you move upon me 1500 01:36:34,482 --> 01:36:38,379 ♪ I can only catch my breath 1501 01:36:38,379 --> 01:36:40,931 ♪ And I don't care where I'm going ♪ 1502 01:36:40,931 --> 01:36:43,103 ♪ As long as you come with 1503 01:36:43,103 --> 01:36:45,862 ♪ As long as you come with 1504 01:36:45,862 --> 01:36:49,862 ♪ As long as you come with 113239

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