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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,135 --> 00:00:11,379 Captioning sponsored by PARAMOUNT PICTURES 2 00:00:11,379 --> 00:00:16,717 Captioning sponsored by PARAMOUNT PICTURES 3 00:00:16,750 --> 00:00:24,125 * Here, there's hills of desert cheap wine * 4 00:00:24,158 --> 00:00:31,532 * Here, there's psychic mocha hotline * 5 00:00:31,565 --> 00:00:34,335 * I'm feeling nothing 6 00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:37,305 * It feels fine 7 00:00:37,338 --> 00:00:41,242 * I'm feeling nothing 8 00:00:47,381 --> 00:00:51,685 * Mo... jo 9 00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:56,224 * Mojo in the sunshine 10 00:00:56,257 --> 00:01:00,328 * Mud slide 11 00:01:00,361 --> 00:01:04,298 * Free-range chocolate shoeshine * 12 00:01:04,332 --> 00:01:07,501 * I'm feeling nothing 13 00:01:07,535 --> 00:01:10,438 * It feels fine 14 00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:13,307 * I'm feeling nothing 15 00:01:13,341 --> 00:01:15,709 * For all to shine. 16 00:01:15,743 --> 00:01:18,746 ( siren blaring ) 17 00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:22,250 MAN: Well, that's what's brilliant about you, Mr. Feldman. 18 00:01:22,283 --> 00:01:24,318 No one else would have thought of building 19 00:01:24,352 --> 00:01:25,753 a residential mini-mall. 20 00:01:25,786 --> 00:01:28,122 Now that I've got everyone else on the block 21 00:01:28,156 --> 00:01:29,590 to agree to your offer, I think we're... 22 00:01:29,623 --> 00:01:32,393 It's got to be everyone on the block-- everyone-- 23 00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:34,128 or the deal's off. 24 00:01:34,162 --> 00:01:36,130 Oh, we're headed into the canyon. 25 00:01:36,164 --> 00:01:37,265 I think I'm losing you. 26 00:01:37,298 --> 00:01:38,599 Mr. Feldman. 27 00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:40,268 Cut the crap, Dittmeyer. 28 00:01:40,301 --> 00:01:42,603 Did you get everyone or not? 29 00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:45,273 Well, there's this one family that's holding out. 30 00:01:45,306 --> 00:01:46,607 Then sweeten the deal. 31 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:47,608 Up the offer. 32 00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:49,143 It's not that simple. 33 00:01:49,177 --> 00:01:51,445 It's like they're not interested in money. 34 00:01:51,479 --> 00:01:53,347 It's like they're not normal. 35 00:01:53,381 --> 00:01:54,682 Why the hell not? 36 00:01:54,715 --> 00:01:56,884 What's their story? 37 00:01:56,917 --> 00:02:00,788 * Here's the story of a lovely lady * 38 00:02:00,821 --> 00:02:05,159 * Who was bringing up three very lovely girls * 39 00:02:05,193 --> 00:02:09,630 * All of them had hair of gold like their mother * 40 00:02:09,663 --> 00:02:12,300 * The youngest one in curls 41 00:02:12,333 --> 00:02:16,337 * It's a story of a man named Brady * 42 00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:19,640 * Who was busy with three boys of his own * 43 00:02:19,673 --> 00:02:23,811 * They were four men living all together * 44 00:02:23,844 --> 00:02:27,448 * Yet they were all alone 45 00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:30,684 * Till the one day when the lady met this fellow * 46 00:02:30,718 --> 00:02:34,355 * And they knew that it was much more than a hunch * 47 00:02:34,388 --> 00:02:38,326 * That this group must somehow form a family * 48 00:02:38,359 --> 00:02:41,462 * That's the way we all became the Brady Bunch * 49 00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:44,198 * The Brady Bunch 50 00:02:44,232 --> 00:02:46,267 * The Brady Bunch 51 00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:50,838 * That's the way we became the Brady Bunch. * 52 00:02:58,979 --> 00:03:00,448 ( sighs ) 53 00:03:10,358 --> 00:03:13,494 ( heavy metal music playing ) 54 00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:15,329 ( grunts ) 55 00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:19,233 Don't worry about me. 56 00:03:19,267 --> 00:03:21,302 I'm okay. 57 00:03:22,403 --> 00:03:23,504 Morning, Mrs. Brady. 58 00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:24,605 Oh, thanks, Alice. 59 00:03:24,638 --> 00:03:25,673 Morning, Alice. 60 00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:28,208 Careful, Mr. Brady. Don't bend over. 61 00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:31,545 We've gotten 62 00:03:31,579 --> 00:03:33,714 the Dittmeyers' mail again, sweetheart. 63 00:03:33,747 --> 00:03:35,516 You'd think, after all these years 64 00:03:35,549 --> 00:03:37,251 they'd know who lives where. 65 00:03:37,285 --> 00:03:40,421 Well, I always know where to deliver my mail. 66 00:03:40,454 --> 00:03:41,355 Mr. Brady... 67 00:03:41,389 --> 00:03:43,357 ( lisping ): Mommy, Marcia's been 68 00:03:43,391 --> 00:03:45,426 in the bathroom for a super-long time. 69 00:03:45,459 --> 00:03:46,727 Now, Cindy, we've told you before-- 70 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:48,429 no one likes a tattletale. 71 00:03:48,462 --> 00:03:50,030 But, Daddy... 72 00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,365 Your father's right, sweetheart. 73 00:03:51,399 --> 00:03:52,366 Why don't you 74 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:53,567 help Alice make some cookies? 75 00:03:53,601 --> 00:03:54,702 Okay, Mommy. 76 00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:57,037 But can my doll help, too? 77 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:59,039 As long as it's not Betsy Wetsy. 78 00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:01,709 She makes my cookies soggy woggy. 79 00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:02,910 Oh, Alice. 80 00:04:04,445 --> 00:04:05,613 Mmm. 81 00:04:05,646 --> 00:04:08,982 4,998... 82 00:04:09,016 --> 00:04:10,751 Come on, Marcia, open up. 83 00:04:10,784 --> 00:04:12,420 I've got to shave. 84 00:04:12,453 --> 00:04:15,055 4,999... 85 00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:18,426 Gosh, Marcia, there are other people in this family 86 00:04:18,459 --> 00:04:19,593 besides you. 87 00:04:19,627 --> 00:04:21,929 5,000. 88 00:04:21,962 --> 00:04:23,431 JAN: Come on, Marcia. 89 00:04:23,464 --> 00:04:26,934 Doug Simpson's sure to notice me today. 90 00:04:26,967 --> 00:04:28,602 All finished. 91 00:04:28,636 --> 00:04:29,603 Finally. 92 00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:30,938 Greg. 93 00:04:30,971 --> 00:04:33,607 Jan, you're just going to have to wait your turn. 94 00:04:33,641 --> 00:04:35,409 It's never my turn. 95 00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:46,587 Jan, did you move my trophies? 96 00:04:46,620 --> 00:04:49,323 Yes. I couldn't look in the mirror 97 00:04:49,357 --> 00:04:53,093 without seeing the awards of the great Marcia Brady. 98 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,796 ( clears throat ) 99 00:04:55,829 --> 00:04:58,966 I believe these are my white kneesocks. 100 00:04:58,999 --> 00:05:01,935 Not everything in this room is yours. 101 00:05:08,075 --> 00:05:11,044 See, Jan? I told you they were mine. 102 00:05:11,078 --> 00:05:13,647 Now, put them back, and don't forget to close 103 00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:14,982 the drawer when you're done. 104 00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:18,486 She has every right to be mad. 105 00:05:18,519 --> 00:05:20,654 They are her socks. 106 00:05:20,688 --> 00:05:23,991 But why does Marcia get all the socks? 107 00:05:24,024 --> 00:05:26,660 Why does Marcia get all the trophies? 108 00:05:26,694 --> 00:05:30,598 Why does Marcia get all the good drawers? 109 00:05:30,631 --> 00:05:33,734 Yeah. Why does Marcia get everything? 110 00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,771 Marcia, Marcia, Marcia. 111 00:05:40,007 --> 00:05:42,610 It's closed! 112 00:05:42,643 --> 00:05:45,012 Come on, Greg. Hurry up. 113 00:05:45,045 --> 00:05:47,681 ( voice cracking ): Boy, he's worse than Marcia. 114 00:05:47,715 --> 00:05:49,383 Hmm. 115 00:05:49,417 --> 00:05:51,852 Hey, what's wrong with your voice? 116 00:05:51,885 --> 00:05:54,855 Well, my libido is increasing at a rapid rate 117 00:05:54,888 --> 00:05:56,524 and the surge of hormones 118 00:05:56,557 --> 00:06:00,394 causes dramatic physical and emotional changes. 119 00:06:00,428 --> 00:06:04,164 Well, that's what Miss Lynley told us in health class. 120 00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:05,866 Finally. 121 00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:07,568 Yeah. 122 00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:10,738 Well, you kids have no idea what it takes to impress a chick. 123 00:06:10,771 --> 00:06:12,540 Maybe, someday, when you're older 124 00:06:12,573 --> 00:06:14,842 you'll get hip to what it's like being a man. 125 00:06:15,909 --> 00:06:17,578 Good news, Greg. 126 00:06:17,611 --> 00:06:20,414 I'm putting on your favorite Scooby Doo bedsheets. 127 00:06:20,448 --> 00:06:21,549 ( laughing ) 128 00:06:21,582 --> 00:06:24,017 Scooby Dooby doo! 129 00:06:25,619 --> 00:06:29,089 Honey, I think you've stirred that enough. 130 00:06:29,122 --> 00:06:30,491 I'm not stirring. 131 00:06:30,524 --> 00:06:34,562 I'm looking for Kitty Carryall's underpants. 132 00:06:34,595 --> 00:06:35,896 I tell you what. 133 00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:37,898 Why don't I take over the cookies, 134 00:06:37,931 --> 00:06:40,434 and you run these letters to the Dittmeyers 135 00:06:40,468 --> 00:06:43,170 and see if they've gotten any of our mail by mistake. 136 00:06:43,203 --> 00:06:44,538 Okay, Mommy. 137 00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:01,822 ( siren blaring ) 138 00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:03,056 Missy, 139 00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:05,025 get your butt-ugly face down here! 140 00:07:05,058 --> 00:07:06,994 Hello, Eric. Are your parents home? 141 00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:09,497 Blow off, cheeseball. 142 00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:12,032 Missy! 143 00:07:12,065 --> 00:07:15,469 Shut up before you have a toxic dump. 144 00:07:15,503 --> 00:07:16,504 Hello, Missy. 145 00:07:16,537 --> 00:07:18,138 How's your science project coming? 146 00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:19,206 I finished mine. 147 00:07:19,239 --> 00:07:21,208 What are you going to do? 148 00:07:21,241 --> 00:07:24,111 Hand in your face and call it barf mold? 149 00:07:24,144 --> 00:07:27,948 ( imitating lisp ): Thee you on the theethaw, Thindy. 150 00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:28,649 Bye. 151 00:07:28,682 --> 00:07:31,952 ( tires screeching ) 152 00:07:33,654 --> 00:07:36,089 Look, Mr. Feldman, I promised they'd sell, and they will. 153 00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:36,857 Like the Bates deal. 154 00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,526 Yeah, I know I took it in the rear 155 00:07:38,559 --> 00:07:39,660 on that subdivision, but this time, 156 00:07:39,693 --> 00:07:40,661 I'm the one who's doing the screwing. 157 00:07:40,694 --> 00:07:42,663 Yeah, well, just make sure one holdout family 158 00:07:42,696 --> 00:07:44,131 doesn't wreck this. You hear me? 159 00:07:44,164 --> 00:07:45,265 Look, can I call you back? 160 00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:46,634 Yeah. Thanks. 161 00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:48,636 Hello, Mr. Dittmeyer. 162 00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:50,638 Why are you here? 163 00:07:50,671 --> 00:07:51,639 Oh. 164 00:07:51,672 --> 00:07:52,973 Thanks. 165 00:07:53,006 --> 00:07:53,907 Mom asked me to ask you 166 00:07:53,941 --> 00:07:55,943 if there's mail for us here by mistake. 167 00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:57,578 I... I don't understand you. 168 00:07:57,611 --> 00:07:58,979 What do you want? 169 00:07:59,012 --> 00:08:00,180 Mom asked me to ask you 170 00:08:00,213 --> 00:08:02,215 if there's any mail for us here by mistake. 171 00:08:02,249 --> 00:08:03,751 What? 172 00:08:03,784 --> 00:08:04,718 Mom asked me to ask you 173 00:08:04,752 --> 00:08:06,987 if there's any mail for us here by mistake. 174 00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:08,155 Nope. Not a clue. 175 00:08:08,188 --> 00:08:11,792 She wants the Bradys' mail, Larry! 176 00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,160 Thank you, darling. 177 00:08:13,193 --> 00:08:15,729 So kind of you to climb out from under your hangover. 178 00:08:15,763 --> 00:08:17,164 Let's see. Where did I file your mail? 179 00:08:17,197 --> 00:08:18,566 Oh, yes. 180 00:08:22,903 --> 00:08:24,204 Hi, honey. 181 00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:25,205 Hi. 182 00:08:25,238 --> 00:08:26,640 How's your daddy? 183 00:08:26,674 --> 00:08:27,174 He's fine. 184 00:08:27,207 --> 00:08:29,777 Mrs. Brady's lucky 185 00:08:29,810 --> 00:08:32,279 to have a big, strong, virile man like that. 186 00:08:34,815 --> 00:08:36,984 Tell you what, sweetie. 187 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,552 Next Christmas, you tell you daddy 188 00:08:38,586 --> 00:08:40,554 I'd be more than happy to wrap his package. 189 00:08:40,588 --> 00:08:41,889 Okay. 190 00:08:41,922 --> 00:08:42,956 Here. Hit the road, bad seed. 191 00:08:42,990 --> 00:08:45,959 Excuse me, but the juice will make your shoes slip. 192 00:08:45,993 --> 00:08:47,761 ( laughing ): What? 193 00:08:47,795 --> 00:08:49,697 Your shoes'll slip in the juice. 194 00:08:50,698 --> 00:08:51,832 Oh. 195 00:08:53,233 --> 00:08:54,568 Bye. 196 00:08:54,602 --> 00:08:56,536 Bye-bye. 197 00:09:01,141 --> 00:09:04,211 ( laughing ) 198 00:09:07,014 --> 00:09:10,984 Daddy, Mrs. Dittmeyer said that she'd be glad 199 00:09:11,018 --> 00:09:13,621 to wrap your package this Christmas. 200 00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:15,623 Hmm... really? 201 00:09:15,656 --> 00:09:17,691 How is Mrs. Dittmeyer? 202 00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:20,260 Mr. Dittmeyer says she's overhung. 203 00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:22,195 But he's not in a good mood 204 00:09:22,229 --> 00:09:25,132 because she's taking it in the rear. 205 00:09:25,165 --> 00:09:27,167 Must be that paperboy again. 206 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:30,170 Cindy, that's Mr. Dittmeyer's business. 207 00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:31,905 Remember, nobody likes a snitch. 208 00:09:31,939 --> 00:09:33,073 I'm not a snitch. 209 00:09:33,106 --> 00:09:34,942 I just tell it like it is. 210 00:09:34,975 --> 00:09:36,844 You know, Cindy, when you tattle on someone, 211 00:09:36,877 --> 00:09:38,278 you're not just telling on them. 212 00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:39,312 You're telling on yourself. 213 00:09:39,346 --> 00:09:41,048 And, by tattling on someone, 214 00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:43,150 you're really just telling them, 215 00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:44,317 "I'm a tattletale." 216 00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:46,353 Now, is that the tale you want to tell? 217 00:09:46,386 --> 00:09:48,989 I never thought of it like that. 218 00:09:49,022 --> 00:09:51,291 Sweetheart, it's time to get 219 00:09:51,324 --> 00:09:52,960 your school things together, honey. 220 00:09:52,993 --> 00:09:55,195 Okay, Mommy. 221 00:09:55,228 --> 00:09:57,264 Hmm... 222 00:09:57,297 --> 00:09:58,766 What is it, Mike? 223 00:09:58,799 --> 00:10:00,668 It's a letter from the county. 224 00:10:00,701 --> 00:10:03,336 They say we haven't paid our property taxes. 225 00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:05,038 Haven't paid our taxes? 226 00:10:05,072 --> 00:10:06,674 We always pay our taxes. 227 00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,942 Well, they say it's the fifth notice 228 00:10:08,976 --> 00:10:11,912 and we owe them $20,000 by the end of the week 229 00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:13,747 or they'll auction our house. 230 00:10:13,781 --> 00:10:16,016 $20,000?! 231 00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:18,185 There has to be a mix-up. 232 00:10:18,218 --> 00:10:20,053 Well, we better call someone. 233 00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:21,421 We are? 234 00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:23,123 You do? 235 00:10:23,156 --> 00:10:25,158 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 236 00:10:25,192 --> 00:10:26,960 I see. 237 00:10:26,994 --> 00:10:28,696 We should?! 238 00:10:28,729 --> 00:10:29,963 You are?! 239 00:10:29,997 --> 00:10:31,198 Uh-huh. 240 00:10:31,231 --> 00:10:34,034 All right. Good-bye. 241 00:10:36,103 --> 00:10:37,204 ( sighs ) 242 00:10:37,237 --> 00:10:38,739 We owe them. 243 00:10:38,772 --> 00:10:40,073 Oh, Mike. 244 00:10:40,107 --> 00:10:41,942 Well, don't you worry, honey. 245 00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:43,343 We'll find the money. 246 00:10:43,376 --> 00:10:44,678 Find the money? 247 00:10:44,712 --> 00:10:46,213 But we used our savings 248 00:10:46,246 --> 00:10:49,216 to go to the Grand Canyon and Hawaii. 249 00:10:49,249 --> 00:10:51,819 What are we going to do, Mike? 250 00:10:55,889 --> 00:10:57,858 Okay, troops... 251 00:10:57,891 --> 00:10:59,192 time for school! 252 00:10:59,226 --> 00:11:00,193 Greg! 253 00:11:00,227 --> 00:11:01,194 Marcia! 254 00:11:01,228 --> 00:11:02,195 Peter! 255 00:11:02,229 --> 00:11:03,196 Jan! 256 00:11:03,230 --> 00:11:04,197 Bobby! 257 00:11:04,231 --> 00:11:05,198 Cindy! 258 00:11:05,232 --> 00:11:06,333 Oh! Oh! 259 00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:07,868 Oh! Oh! 260 00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:10,203 Do we always have to walk so close? 261 00:11:10,237 --> 00:11:12,172 ALL: Oh, Jan. 262 00:11:12,205 --> 00:11:14,341 Uh... Mom, can I borrow your car today? 263 00:11:14,374 --> 00:11:16,343 I want to ask Donna Leonard 264 00:11:16,376 --> 00:11:18,345 to go out for a soda after school. 265 00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:20,413 All right, but no hot-rodding. 266 00:11:20,447 --> 00:11:21,782 Thanks, Mom. 267 00:11:21,815 --> 00:11:24,284 She's the most far-out chick in my class. 268 00:11:24,317 --> 00:11:25,853 You wouldn't believe 269 00:11:25,886 --> 00:11:27,054 how much I dig her. 270 00:11:27,087 --> 00:11:28,055 Sure, I would. 271 00:11:28,088 --> 00:11:29,489 I've been digging Sam so long, 272 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:31,024 by the time he proposes, 273 00:11:31,058 --> 00:11:32,192 I'll be six feet under. 274 00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:33,293 ( all laughing ) 275 00:11:33,326 --> 00:11:36,997 Oh, Alice, what would we do without you? 276 00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:38,498 Probably eat out. 277 00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:40,067 ( all laughing ) 278 00:11:41,501 --> 00:11:44,004 Hey, why the long face, Bobby? 279 00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:46,506 Well, ever since I became a safety monitor 280 00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:48,141 at school... 281 00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:49,442 nobody will talk to me. 282 00:11:49,476 --> 00:11:51,879 They think I'm some kind of fink. 283 00:11:51,912 --> 00:11:53,914 Bobby, people like to be corrected 284 00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:56,049 when they're doing something wrong. 285 00:11:56,083 --> 00:11:58,018 That's how we improve ourselves. 286 00:11:58,051 --> 00:12:00,320 Right, Dad. 287 00:12:00,353 --> 00:12:02,289 And, if your sister would wear her glasses, 288 00:12:02,322 --> 00:12:04,024 she just might improve her eyesight. 289 00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:06,159 Marcia doesn't have to wear glasses. 290 00:12:06,193 --> 00:12:08,195 Besides, all my friends at school 291 00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,530 say glasses make me look positively goofy. 292 00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:14,401 Now, honey, you look very lovely with your glasses on. 293 00:12:14,434 --> 00:12:15,936 Doesn't she, kids? 294 00:12:15,969 --> 00:12:18,105 Far out, Jan. Yeah. Yeah. 295 00:12:18,138 --> 00:12:19,239 GREG: You look great. 296 00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:21,174 Yeah, I mean it. Outtasight. 297 00:12:21,208 --> 00:12:22,342 ( all murmuring agreement ) 298 00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:25,412 MIKE: All right, troops, off to school. 299 00:12:25,445 --> 00:12:26,413 CAROL: Good-bye. 300 00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:27,414 Have a good day. 301 00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:28,548 GREG: Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad. 302 00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:29,549 Bye, Mom. 303 00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:30,550 Come on, Marcia. 304 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:31,551 I'm coming. 305 00:12:31,584 --> 00:12:32,986 Jan, a real friend 306 00:12:33,020 --> 00:12:34,421 likes you for who you are, 307 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:36,156 not what's on your face. 308 00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:37,457 If you judge your friends 309 00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:38,892 for passing judgment on you, 310 00:12:38,926 --> 00:12:40,393 you're not only judging yourself 311 00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,295 you're judging your friends for judging you. 312 00:12:42,329 --> 00:12:43,864 And that would be using bad judgment. 313 00:12:43,897 --> 00:12:46,333 I never thought of it that way. 314 00:12:46,366 --> 00:12:48,301 CAROL: Jan? 315 00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:51,504 Oh. 316 00:12:56,009 --> 00:12:57,477 Bye. 317 00:12:57,510 --> 00:12:58,979 CAROL: Bye, honey. 318 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,315 ( sighs ) 319 00:13:15,362 --> 00:13:17,030 Bye, Bobby. 320 00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:18,398 Bye, Jan. 321 00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:21,301 Oh! 322 00:13:26,273 --> 00:13:27,440 Oh! Oh! 323 00:13:33,513 --> 00:13:34,314 ( loud crash ) 324 00:13:34,347 --> 00:13:35,482 Ow! 325 00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:40,253 ( dog barking ) 326 00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:41,388 ( horn honking ) 327 00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:44,124 ( tires screeching ) 328 00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:46,459 Stupid little punk kid, stay out 329 00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:47,527 of the road! 330 00:13:48,595 --> 00:13:50,430 ( brakes screeching ) 331 00:13:50,463 --> 00:13:52,399 ( horn honking ) 332 00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:56,203 Davy Jones is the most. 333 00:13:56,236 --> 00:13:57,637 I sure wish he'd write back. 334 00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:59,372 I wrote him over a month ago. 335 00:13:59,406 --> 00:14:02,042 But, Marcia, he gets millions of letters. 336 00:14:02,075 --> 00:14:03,911 But I president of his fan club 337 00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:04,912 and I invited him 338 00:14:04,945 --> 00:14:06,613 to entertain at the school dance. 339 00:14:06,646 --> 00:14:08,381 A big rock star like that 340 00:14:08,415 --> 00:14:11,351 can't just drop everything for our dance. 341 00:14:11,384 --> 00:14:13,386 Geez, you can be so silly sometimes. 342 00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:15,455 Everybody out. This is a carjack. 343 00:14:15,488 --> 00:14:17,557 Well, of course this is a car. 344 00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:20,427 But my name's not Jack-- it's Greg. 345 00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:22,229 And this is my sister Marcia. 346 00:14:22,262 --> 00:14:23,363 Hi. 347 00:14:23,396 --> 00:14:24,331 And you are? 348 00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:25,899 Eddie. Wait a minute. Didn't you hear me? 349 00:14:25,933 --> 00:14:26,934 Get out now! 350 00:14:26,967 --> 00:14:28,601 This is a carjacking. 351 00:14:28,635 --> 00:14:30,403 Greg, I think he has a flat tire. 352 00:14:30,437 --> 00:14:32,139 He must need a jack. 353 00:14:32,172 --> 00:14:33,140 Sorry, Eddie. 354 00:14:33,173 --> 00:14:35,108 We don't have a jack. 355 00:14:35,142 --> 00:14:36,376 But don't worry. I'll call AAA 356 00:14:36,409 --> 00:14:37,410 as soon as we get to school. 357 00:14:37,444 --> 00:14:39,312 It was so nice to meet you. 358 00:14:39,346 --> 00:14:40,313 Bye-bye. 359 00:14:40,347 --> 00:14:41,381 ( horn honking ) 360 00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:43,483 MAN: Hey, you moron! 361 00:14:43,516 --> 00:14:45,452 Out of the way, jerk! 362 00:14:46,619 --> 00:14:48,922 Now, don't worry about the house, honey. 363 00:14:48,956 --> 00:14:51,591 I'm sure Mr. Phillips will advance me the money. 364 00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:53,293 Oh, of course he will. 365 00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:55,495 You're the best player on his team. 366 00:14:55,528 --> 00:14:57,464 Mmm. Go get 'em, tiger. 367 00:14:59,166 --> 00:15:00,968 Tiger... Tiger... 368 00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:03,603 Whatever happened to that dog? 369 00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:04,637 Ha! Brady. 370 00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:06,273 Morning, Larry. 371 00:15:06,306 --> 00:15:09,309 You know, I was just reading about some beautiful property 372 00:15:09,342 --> 00:15:10,477 available up in Utah. 373 00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:13,346 I'll bet you'd feel right at home there. 374 00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:15,548 Blue skies, clean living, Osmonds. 375 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:18,618 Thanks, Larry, but I'm still not interested in moving. 376 00:15:18,651 --> 00:15:20,087 I love this house. 377 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:23,056 Carol loves it, the kids love it, Alice loves it. 378 00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:25,358 It was our first house all together. 379 00:15:25,392 --> 00:15:27,160 Half a mil-- take it or leave it. 380 00:15:27,194 --> 00:15:31,331 Like I said, there's nothing that could get us to sell. 381 00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:33,600 I designed this house myself. 382 00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:35,468 It's in perfect condition. 383 00:15:35,502 --> 00:15:39,606 Carol thinks so, the kids think so, Alice thinks so. 384 00:15:39,639 --> 00:15:41,374 Sorry. 385 00:15:41,408 --> 00:15:44,544 Well, you can't blame a guy for trying, huh? 386 00:15:44,577 --> 00:15:48,181 ( laughing ) 387 00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:51,084 Putz. 388 00:15:58,591 --> 00:16:01,528 Uh... excuse me, Mr. Dittmeyer... 389 00:16:01,561 --> 00:16:03,496 but, as a member of the safety patrol, 390 00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:06,033 I must warn you that your hedge is overgrown 391 00:16:06,066 --> 00:16:08,001 and can block the view of the street 392 00:16:08,035 --> 00:16:09,136 for oncoming traffic. 393 00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:11,038 I know this because I was on my bike 394 00:16:11,071 --> 00:16:13,140 and checked out the sight lines myself. 395 00:16:13,173 --> 00:16:14,774 Hmm. Well, you see, Billy... 396 00:16:14,807 --> 00:16:15,575 Bobby. 397 00:16:15,608 --> 00:16:17,010 Like it matters. 398 00:16:17,044 --> 00:16:18,611 I grew my hedge tall for a reason. 399 00:16:19,779 --> 00:16:22,582 So I wouldn't have to see your family. 400 00:16:22,615 --> 00:16:24,651 Thank you for your concern. 401 00:16:32,725 --> 00:16:34,627 ( horn honking ) 402 00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:35,728 ( glass breaking ) 403 00:16:35,762 --> 00:16:37,130 MAN: Loco! Loco! 404 00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:38,565 ( alarm blaring ) 405 00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:42,069 You are standing too close to the vehicle. 406 00:16:42,102 --> 00:16:44,537 * I've seen the future, and this is... * 407 00:16:51,578 --> 00:16:53,546 ( horn honking ) 408 00:17:03,723 --> 00:17:05,692 * ...warmer, girl 409 00:17:05,725 --> 00:17:08,161 * Making the music softer... 410 00:17:11,664 --> 00:17:12,799 See you later. 411 00:17:18,605 --> 00:17:20,707 Hey, there, groovy chick. 412 00:17:20,740 --> 00:17:22,242 Oh, great. 413 00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:26,313 Do I look like a yellow, fuzzy baby bird to you? 414 00:17:26,346 --> 00:17:27,780 Hey, that's funny, Donna. 415 00:17:27,814 --> 00:17:30,517 You know, you are really happening in a far-out way. 416 00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:31,718 How about you and me 417 00:17:31,751 --> 00:17:33,586 going out for a soda after school? 418 00:17:33,620 --> 00:17:35,455 Sorry. I got a step class. 419 00:17:35,488 --> 00:17:37,290 If you're having problems with your steps 420 00:17:37,324 --> 00:17:39,759 maybe you should let me carry your books to history class. 421 00:17:39,792 --> 00:17:42,762 I can hold my own books, and it's not history-- 422 00:17:42,795 --> 00:17:44,531 it's "herstory." 423 00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:45,732 Wow. 424 00:17:50,337 --> 00:17:51,738 Hi, everybody. 425 00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:57,644 * A goddess on a mountaintop 426 00:17:57,677 --> 00:18:03,316 * Was burnin' like a silver flame... * 427 00:18:03,350 --> 00:18:04,317 Hey, Marcia. 428 00:18:04,351 --> 00:18:05,652 Hello, Doug Simpson. 429 00:18:05,685 --> 00:18:08,155 * And Venus was her name... 430 00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:10,423 God, she drives me crazy! 431 00:18:10,457 --> 00:18:12,559 DOUG: I got to have that. 432 00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:14,727 I live next door to her. 433 00:18:14,761 --> 00:18:16,396 And she's harder to get into 434 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,165 than a Pearl Jam concert. 435 00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:20,433 What are you guys talking about? 436 00:18:20,467 --> 00:18:22,735 Just how twisted the Bradys are. 437 00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:23,870 Especially Marcia. 438 00:18:23,903 --> 00:18:25,705 What a retro-wannabe. 439 00:18:25,738 --> 00:18:28,241 I think Peter's a babe. 440 00:18:28,275 --> 00:18:31,144 Well, in a Gilligan sort of way. 441 00:18:31,178 --> 00:18:32,479 What, are you nuts? 442 00:18:32,512 --> 00:18:33,480 ( bell rings ) 443 00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:34,481 Biology. 444 00:18:34,514 --> 00:18:35,782 Take notes. 445 00:18:37,484 --> 00:18:38,751 What? 446 00:18:39,852 --> 00:18:41,488 * Wow! 447 00:18:41,521 --> 00:18:43,156 * She's got it 448 00:18:43,190 --> 00:18:46,593 * Yeah, baby, she's got it... 449 00:18:46,626 --> 00:18:48,261 ( sighs ) 450 00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:49,596 Hi, Marcia. 451 00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:50,763 Hi. 452 00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:52,765 Oh, guess what? My mom said I can sleep over. 453 00:18:52,799 --> 00:18:53,900 Oh, really? 454 00:18:53,933 --> 00:18:55,735 That's great, Noreen. Guess what else. 455 00:18:55,768 --> 00:18:57,537 Doug just said hi to me. 456 00:18:57,570 --> 00:18:59,172 He is so dreamy, isn't he? 457 00:18:59,206 --> 00:19:00,507 Yeah, I guess. 458 00:19:00,540 --> 00:19:01,508 ( signs ) 459 00:19:01,541 --> 00:19:02,909 If you like 460 00:19:02,942 --> 00:19:04,311 that sort of thing. 461 00:19:04,344 --> 00:19:06,913 So, can I carry your books to class? 462 00:19:06,946 --> 00:19:08,915 Sure, Noreen. 463 00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:11,684 After all, you are my best friend. 464 00:19:11,718 --> 00:19:13,353 Uh-oh. 465 00:19:13,386 --> 00:19:14,487 Here comes Doug. 466 00:19:14,521 --> 00:19:14,854 Go away. 467 00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:15,855 Sure. 468 00:19:15,888 --> 00:19:16,623 No, no. Stay. 469 00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:17,490 Okay. 470 00:19:17,524 --> 00:19:18,558 No, no. Leave. 471 00:19:18,591 --> 00:19:18,991 Fine. 472 00:19:19,025 --> 00:19:19,659 No, no. Stay. 473 00:19:19,692 --> 00:19:20,793 And pretend I just said 474 00:19:20,827 --> 00:19:22,395 something really funny. 475 00:19:22,429 --> 00:19:23,730 What? Oh. 476 00:19:23,763 --> 00:19:25,732 ( laughing ) 477 00:19:25,765 --> 00:19:26,899 DOUG: Hi, Marcia. 478 00:19:26,933 --> 00:19:28,835 ( laughs and snorts ) 479 00:19:28,868 --> 00:19:29,869 What's up? 480 00:19:29,902 --> 00:19:30,870 Oh. Um... hi, Doug. 481 00:19:30,903 --> 00:19:31,938 Listen, I was just wondering, 482 00:19:31,971 --> 00:19:33,273 if you're not doing anything 483 00:19:33,306 --> 00:19:36,276 Friday night, maybe you'd like to go 484 00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:37,710 to the dance with me. 485 00:19:37,744 --> 00:19:39,612 Sure. That would be a blast. 486 00:19:40,747 --> 00:19:42,882 Cool. You'll hear from me. 487 00:19:42,915 --> 00:19:44,284 Great. 488 00:19:46,753 --> 00:19:49,689 He's so outtasight. 489 00:19:50,890 --> 00:19:51,991 ( sighs ) 490 00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:53,726 Oh, my gosh! 491 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:55,395 I just remembered. 492 00:19:55,428 --> 00:19:56,396 What? 493 00:19:56,429 --> 00:19:57,630 I already told Charlie 494 00:19:57,664 --> 00:19:59,466 I would go to the dance with him. 495 00:19:59,499 --> 00:20:00,633 So? 496 00:20:00,667 --> 00:20:03,236 So I can't go out with two boys at once. 497 00:20:03,270 --> 00:20:07,407 I like Charlie, but Doug is so cute. 498 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,377 And, after all, he is the big man on campus. 499 00:20:11,778 --> 00:20:13,813 Noreen, what am I going to do? 500 00:20:13,846 --> 00:20:17,550 This is the worst mess I've ever gotten myself into. 501 00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:18,551 The worst! 502 00:20:18,585 --> 00:20:19,552 Oh... 503 00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:21,721 My life is over! 504 00:20:21,754 --> 00:20:23,923 ( bell rings ) 505 00:20:23,956 --> 00:20:27,427 TEACHER: So, that is what males experience 506 00:20:27,460 --> 00:20:29,762 during the onset of puberty. 507 00:20:29,796 --> 00:20:33,600 Now, as far as the young women are concerned... 508 00:20:33,633 --> 00:20:36,403 First, we begin with ovulation and its effect 509 00:20:36,436 --> 00:20:38,938 on the female body. 510 00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:39,806 ( snoring ) 511 00:20:39,839 --> 00:20:41,341 Peter? 512 00:20:41,374 --> 00:20:42,642 Yes, Miss Lynley? 513 00:20:42,675 --> 00:20:44,777 Why don't you come up here 514 00:20:44,811 --> 00:20:47,914 and take the pointer... and we will trace 515 00:20:47,947 --> 00:20:50,583 the path of the ovum through the fallopian tube, 516 00:20:50,617 --> 00:20:55,288 where the uterine lining is flushed through the vagina. 517 00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:58,658 Ohh... 518 00:20:58,691 --> 00:21:00,660 Oh! Peter! 519 00:21:00,693 --> 00:21:02,895 Peter! 520 00:21:03,930 --> 00:21:06,833 So, Jan, what can I help you with? 521 00:21:06,866 --> 00:21:08,501 Teen pregnancy? 522 00:21:08,535 --> 00:21:09,802 Bulimia? 523 00:21:09,836 --> 00:21:11,971 Suicidal tendencies? 524 00:21:12,004 --> 00:21:15,375 No. It's my stupid glasses. 525 00:21:15,408 --> 00:21:17,377 Oh. 526 00:21:17,410 --> 00:21:18,811 I know I should wear them. 527 00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:21,748 I look at myself in the mirror every morning 528 00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:24,717 and I say to myself, "Jan, put on your glasses." 529 00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:27,520 But then I say, "You look like a super creep. 530 00:21:27,554 --> 00:21:28,821 Take them off." 531 00:21:28,855 --> 00:21:31,691 It's like my head tells me to do different things 532 00:21:31,724 --> 00:21:32,859 and I get very confused. 533 00:21:32,892 --> 00:21:34,461 Inner voices? 534 00:21:34,494 --> 00:21:36,463 Good. That's good. 535 00:21:36,496 --> 00:21:38,565 Let's explore that. 536 00:21:38,598 --> 00:21:40,467 What does she mean, "inner voices"? 537 00:21:40,500 --> 00:21:42,702 I don't think that's any of her business. 538 00:21:42,735 --> 00:21:44,837 But it's her job to ask questions. 539 00:21:44,871 --> 00:21:47,006 You are so dumb. 540 00:21:47,039 --> 00:21:49,008 I don't have "inner voices." 541 00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:50,710 Now, Jan, 542 00:21:50,743 --> 00:21:53,346 paranoid schizophrenia is very common 543 00:21:53,380 --> 00:21:55,982 amongst children of blended families. 544 00:21:56,015 --> 00:21:58,585 You are the middle child, aren't you? 545 00:21:58,618 --> 00:21:59,752 Middle child? 546 00:21:59,786 --> 00:22:02,722 Don't you mean Marcia Brady's little sister? 547 00:22:02,755 --> 00:22:05,858 Wait a minute. She's just trying to help. 548 00:22:06,893 --> 00:22:08,160 Help? Wake up! 549 00:22:08,194 --> 00:22:11,464 She's just looking for an excuse to bring up Marcia. 550 00:22:11,498 --> 00:22:12,899 Marcia! Marcia! Marcia! 551 00:22:12,932 --> 00:22:15,535 Yes! I'm in the middle! 552 00:22:15,568 --> 00:22:18,405 Well, it sounds like you have a serious case 553 00:22:18,438 --> 00:22:19,872 of... 554 00:22:19,906 --> 00:22:21,841 "middle child syndrome." 555 00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:23,743 But you needn't worry. 556 00:22:23,776 --> 00:22:25,845 Here's a copy of my book... 557 00:22:27,414 --> 00:22:29,048 and my tapes. 558 00:22:29,081 --> 00:22:31,050 In the meantime, 559 00:22:31,083 --> 00:22:33,753 do something to make yourself stand out-- 560 00:22:33,786 --> 00:22:36,022 give you your own look-- 561 00:22:36,055 --> 00:22:38,658 apart from your siblings. 562 00:22:38,691 --> 00:22:40,593 A new look. 563 00:22:40,627 --> 00:22:41,528 That's it. 564 00:22:41,561 --> 00:22:44,130 Gee, thanks, Mrs. Cummings. 565 00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:47,066 Jan, come back 566 00:22:47,099 --> 00:22:48,601 when you're pregnant. 567 00:22:49,902 --> 00:22:53,172 And, girl, you better work. 568 00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:55,475 * Work it down 569 00:22:55,508 --> 00:22:57,176 * Do your thing... 570 00:22:57,209 --> 00:23:00,046 BOY: There ain't no justice! 571 00:23:00,079 --> 00:23:01,180 Hi, Holly. 572 00:23:01,213 --> 00:23:02,181 Hi. 573 00:23:02,214 --> 00:23:03,816 Can I give you a hand? 574 00:23:03,850 --> 00:23:05,017 Yeah. Thanks. 575 00:23:06,218 --> 00:23:07,554 I'm over here. 576 00:23:08,988 --> 00:23:11,023 Hey... 577 00:23:11,057 --> 00:23:12,892 Petey. 578 00:23:12,925 --> 00:23:14,193 Look, Leon. 579 00:23:14,226 --> 00:23:16,028 It's Holly's little friend. 580 00:23:16,062 --> 00:23:18,898 Hey, knock it off or I'll... 581 00:23:18,931 --> 00:23:20,567 Or you'll what? 582 00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:22,134 Dittmeyer! 583 00:23:22,168 --> 00:23:24,537 Do it and die. 584 00:23:30,777 --> 00:23:33,045 I'm going to get you, Brady. 585 00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:36,983 A $20,000 advance? 586 00:23:37,016 --> 00:23:38,918 I'd like to, Mike, 587 00:23:38,951 --> 00:23:40,920 but we're still hurting from the recession. 588 00:23:40,953 --> 00:23:44,090 I only have three developers coming all this week. 589 00:23:44,123 --> 00:23:46,826 Let me have a shot at those projects, Mr. Phillips. 590 00:23:46,859 --> 00:23:48,928 If I can sell one of them my design 591 00:23:48,961 --> 00:23:50,763 you could front me the advance, right? 592 00:23:50,797 --> 00:23:53,232 Sure, but... 593 00:23:53,265 --> 00:23:56,803 How should I put this delicately, Mike? 594 00:23:58,237 --> 00:24:02,074 Your designs are from another time. 595 00:24:02,108 --> 00:24:05,578 That's kind of you to say, Mr. Phillips. 596 00:24:05,612 --> 00:24:06,846 I've always thought 597 00:24:06,879 --> 00:24:09,115 of my style as "classic," as well. 598 00:24:09,148 --> 00:24:10,683 I'll get right to work. 599 00:24:14,286 --> 00:24:17,156 Well, Mr. Amir, what do you think? 600 00:24:17,189 --> 00:24:18,891 I love it. 601 00:24:18,925 --> 00:24:21,694 But it's too... 602 00:24:21,728 --> 00:24:23,129 interesting. 603 00:24:23,162 --> 00:24:24,631 I want something simple. 604 00:24:24,664 --> 00:24:26,799 A couple of self-serve pump 605 00:24:26,833 --> 00:24:28,768 and a Slurpee machine. 606 00:24:30,837 --> 00:24:32,071 Sorry. 607 00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:37,143 It's only strike one, Mr. Phillips. 608 00:24:37,176 --> 00:24:39,979 I've still got two more times at bat. 609 00:24:40,012 --> 00:24:43,282 ( whistling a sprightly tune ) 610 00:24:43,315 --> 00:24:45,151 Cinderella, 611 00:24:45,184 --> 00:24:46,819 dressed in yellow, 612 00:24:46,853 --> 00:24:48,154 went to the ball 613 00:24:48,187 --> 00:24:49,922 to kiss the fellow. 614 00:24:49,956 --> 00:24:52,158 Hey, Heidi, go yodel in your own yard, huh? 615 00:24:52,191 --> 00:24:54,126 Okay, Mr. Dittmeyer. 616 00:25:02,168 --> 00:25:03,970 Whoa! 617 00:25:19,351 --> 00:25:21,020 Hey! 618 00:25:21,053 --> 00:25:22,288 Hey, little girl! 619 00:25:24,190 --> 00:25:26,025 I got to get something 620 00:25:26,058 --> 00:25:27,159 out of my truck. 621 00:25:27,193 --> 00:25:28,728 Don't let anybody 622 00:25:28,761 --> 00:25:30,763 touch this wire. 623 00:25:30,797 --> 00:25:33,265 Can you do that? Of course. 624 00:25:38,871 --> 00:25:40,973 Daddy, there's a Brady in our yard! 625 00:25:44,711 --> 00:25:46,713 I thought I told you 626 00:25:46,746 --> 00:25:47,680 to stay 627 00:25:47,714 --> 00:25:48,881 in your own yard. 628 00:25:48,915 --> 00:25:51,651 Yes. But you see, Mr. Dittmeyer, I'm simply standing here... 629 00:25:51,684 --> 00:25:53,686 You know, the lisp thing is really getting old. 630 00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:56,155 So why don't you hop back on the Swiss Miss package 631 00:25:56,188 --> 00:25:57,724 where you belong, huh? 632 00:25:57,757 --> 00:25:58,991 Okay. 633 00:25:59,025 --> 00:26:00,326 Oh. 634 00:26:00,359 --> 00:26:03,329 Don't forget your jump rope. 635 00:26:03,362 --> 00:26:05,231 ( screaming ) 636 00:26:05,264 --> 00:26:07,967 Ohh... 637 00:26:12,739 --> 00:26:14,841 Try it and you're Spam. 638 00:26:14,874 --> 00:26:16,142 ( whimpering ) 639 00:26:20,012 --> 00:26:22,081 Well, Mr. Brady, 640 00:26:22,114 --> 00:26:24,784 did you hit a home run today? 641 00:26:24,817 --> 00:26:29,055 My design didn't even make it to first base. 642 00:26:33,225 --> 00:26:35,161 ( sighs ) 643 00:26:36,763 --> 00:26:38,330 You know, maybe we should think 644 00:26:38,364 --> 00:26:41,000 about taking Mr. Dittmeyer up on his offer. 645 00:26:41,033 --> 00:26:44,203 You're serious about selling the house? 646 00:26:44,236 --> 00:26:46,072 Carol, I designed this house myself-- 647 00:26:46,105 --> 00:26:47,206 every color, every brick, 648 00:26:47,239 --> 00:26:48,741 every sheet of Formica. 649 00:26:48,775 --> 00:26:51,110 If I knew another way out, I'd take it. 650 00:26:51,143 --> 00:26:52,779 But where else are we going to find 651 00:26:52,812 --> 00:26:54,647 $20,000 by the end of the week? 652 00:26:54,681 --> 00:26:56,148 Oh, no. 653 00:26:56,182 --> 00:26:58,885 We're going to have to sell our house. 654 00:27:02,789 --> 00:27:05,725 * Clowns never laughed before 655 00:27:05,758 --> 00:27:09,829 * Beanstalks never grew * 656 00:27:09,862 --> 00:27:13,099 * No one ever loved... 657 00:27:14,100 --> 00:27:15,668 What is it, Cindy? 658 00:27:15,702 --> 00:27:18,237 I'm busy writing a song for Danielle. 659 00:27:18,270 --> 00:27:20,873 I have to tell you something. 660 00:27:20,907 --> 00:27:22,241 Okay. 661 00:27:22,274 --> 00:27:23,409 But I can't tell you, 662 00:27:23,442 --> 00:27:25,011 'cause that would be tattling. 663 00:27:25,044 --> 00:27:26,078 Come on, Cindy. 664 00:27:26,112 --> 00:27:28,180 If it's important, it's not tattling. 665 00:27:28,214 --> 00:27:29,315 I'm never going to tell 666 00:27:29,348 --> 00:27:31,751 that Mom and Dad have to sell the house 667 00:27:31,784 --> 00:27:33,085 because they owe 668 00:27:33,119 --> 00:27:34,253 $20,000. 669 00:27:34,286 --> 00:27:36,288 Oops. 670 00:27:37,489 --> 00:27:39,225 And that's why I called this meeting. 671 00:27:39,258 --> 00:27:40,960 Greg, what are we going to do? 672 00:27:40,993 --> 00:27:44,130 Yeah. If we don't raise $20,000 in one week, 673 00:27:44,163 --> 00:27:45,264 we'll have to move. 674 00:27:45,297 --> 00:27:47,133 And go to a new school. 675 00:27:47,166 --> 00:27:48,334 And make new friends. 676 00:27:48,367 --> 00:27:51,137 But, Jan, you don't have any friends. 677 00:27:51,170 --> 00:27:53,272 Wait. We can save the house. 678 00:27:53,305 --> 00:27:55,441 We can raise the money ourselves. 679 00:27:55,474 --> 00:27:57,143 But how? 680 00:27:57,176 --> 00:27:59,111 Well, we can each get jobs and earn extra money. 681 00:27:59,145 --> 00:28:01,147 ( voice cracking ): Hey, neato idea. 682 00:28:01,180 --> 00:28:03,349 Gee, there are so many things I'm good at. 683 00:28:03,382 --> 00:28:04,784 I wouldn't know where to start. 684 00:28:04,817 --> 00:28:08,721 ( mimicking ): Oh, I'm just so perfect at so many things. 685 00:28:08,755 --> 00:28:10,189 You're just jealous, Jan. 686 00:28:10,222 --> 00:28:12,324 I'm going to make some serious cash. 687 00:28:12,358 --> 00:28:14,994 Oh, yeah? Well, I bet I can make more than you. 688 00:28:15,027 --> 00:28:16,128 With what, shrimpo? 689 00:28:16,162 --> 00:28:17,463 Your tooth fairy money? 690 00:28:17,496 --> 00:28:19,165 Who are you calling "shrimpo"? 691 00:28:19,198 --> 00:28:20,299 Hey, Mom always said 692 00:28:20,332 --> 00:28:22,301 don't play ball in the house. 693 00:28:22,334 --> 00:28:24,270 ( all arguing ) 694 00:28:24,303 --> 00:28:26,205 Hey, you guys, stop fighting! 695 00:28:26,238 --> 00:28:28,307 If we're going to save this house for Mom and Dad, 696 00:28:28,340 --> 00:28:29,475 we've each got to make 697 00:28:29,508 --> 00:28:31,043 as much as we can. 698 00:28:31,077 --> 00:28:32,078 Yeah. 699 00:28:32,111 --> 00:28:33,112 Yeah. 700 00:28:33,145 --> 00:28:34,046 Yeah. 701 00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:35,247 Yeah. 702 00:28:42,889 --> 00:28:45,892 MARCIA: But, Jan, you don't have any friends. 703 00:28:45,925 --> 00:28:47,994 You're just jealous, Jan. 704 00:28:59,906 --> 00:29:02,108 Jan! What are you doing? 705 00:29:02,141 --> 00:29:03,275 Go back to sleep, Cindy. 706 00:29:03,309 --> 00:29:04,811 Jan, don't! 707 00:29:04,844 --> 00:29:06,913 Marcia's hair is so beautiful. 708 00:29:06,946 --> 00:29:08,180 Exactly. That's why 709 00:29:08,214 --> 00:29:11,050 I'm going to get a lot of money 710 00:29:11,083 --> 00:29:12,819 when I sell it. 711 00:29:14,020 --> 00:29:17,857 ( laughing ) 712 00:29:17,890 --> 00:29:19,291 ( screaming ) 713 00:29:19,325 --> 00:29:20,860 Jan, 714 00:29:20,893 --> 00:29:22,528 what are you doing? 715 00:29:22,561 --> 00:29:24,263 Oh, Marcia. 716 00:29:24,296 --> 00:29:26,265 I love your hair. 717 00:29:26,298 --> 00:29:28,835 Ooh! What a groovy hairdo. 718 00:29:28,868 --> 00:29:30,837 Oh, you're so beautiful! 719 00:29:30,870 --> 00:29:32,304 No! She's supposed 720 00:29:32,338 --> 00:29:33,439 to look bad. 721 00:29:33,472 --> 00:29:36,242 No! Nooooo! 722 00:29:36,275 --> 00:29:38,510 ( alarm ringing ) 723 00:29:40,947 --> 00:29:44,383 What a horrible dream. 724 00:29:44,416 --> 00:29:47,887 ( pretending to play ) 725 00:29:51,490 --> 00:29:53,525 Greg, have you gone bananas? 726 00:29:53,559 --> 00:29:58,064 No. I just found a way to save our house. 727 00:29:58,097 --> 00:30:00,599 I'm going to become a rock star. 728 00:30:00,632 --> 00:30:04,203 That's great, Greg, but I need some advice 729 00:30:04,236 --> 00:30:06,205 about something really important. 730 00:30:06,238 --> 00:30:08,074 See, Charlie asked me to the dance 731 00:30:08,107 --> 00:30:09,308 and I said yes. 732 00:30:09,341 --> 00:30:12,178 Then Doug asked me, and I said yes to him, too. 733 00:30:12,211 --> 00:30:13,345 What am I going to do? 734 00:30:13,379 --> 00:30:17,183 Well, you just tell the guy you don't want to go with 735 00:30:17,216 --> 00:30:19,351 that something suddenly came up. 736 00:30:19,385 --> 00:30:20,619 And that works? 737 00:30:20,652 --> 00:30:24,823 Sure. Girls say it to me all the time. 738 00:30:28,995 --> 00:30:30,262 Hey, Marcia. 739 00:30:30,296 --> 00:30:31,898 Oh, hi, Charlie. 740 00:30:31,931 --> 00:30:34,333 I can't wait until the dance Friday night. 741 00:30:34,366 --> 00:30:37,136 Oh. Um... 742 00:30:37,169 --> 00:30:39,438 about the dance, Charlie... 743 00:30:39,471 --> 00:30:42,508 well, something suddenly came up. 744 00:30:42,541 --> 00:30:45,311 Oh. 745 00:30:45,344 --> 00:30:47,613 Oh, well, you know, that's okay. 746 00:30:47,646 --> 00:30:49,315 Maybe some other time? 747 00:30:49,348 --> 00:30:50,883 Sure. 748 00:30:50,917 --> 00:30:52,218 Bye. 749 00:30:52,251 --> 00:30:53,419 Bye. 750 00:30:54,486 --> 00:30:56,122 Greg was right. 751 00:30:57,323 --> 00:31:00,126 Well, that takes care of that problem. 752 00:31:01,293 --> 00:31:03,295 Let's see what's next. 753 00:31:05,431 --> 00:31:07,366 Hmm. 754 00:31:12,038 --> 00:31:15,007 * Clowns never laughed before 755 00:31:15,041 --> 00:31:17,476 * Beanstalks never grew... * 756 00:31:17,509 --> 00:31:19,111 BOBBY: "Attention! 757 00:31:19,145 --> 00:31:21,580 "Missing school office supplies. 758 00:31:21,613 --> 00:31:23,249 Reward offered." 759 00:31:23,282 --> 00:31:26,185 Office supplies? I don't know what you're talking about. 760 00:31:26,218 --> 00:31:27,353 Yeah. I heard it before. 761 00:31:27,386 --> 00:31:29,488 You know, I've got reward money 762 00:31:29,521 --> 00:31:30,923 riding on this. 763 00:31:30,957 --> 00:31:32,558 Now, spread 'em. 764 00:31:34,193 --> 00:31:36,495 Oh, come on, Mrs. Whitfield! 765 00:31:36,528 --> 00:31:39,098 You're going to have to do 766 00:31:39,131 --> 00:31:40,299 better than that! 767 00:31:49,341 --> 00:31:50,709 Boy, you sure have 768 00:31:50,742 --> 00:31:54,446 some strong thigh muscles, Mrs. Whitfield. 769 00:31:55,481 --> 00:31:56,648 But I've been here for hours! 770 00:31:56,682 --> 00:31:58,517 Please! You won't regret it! 771 00:31:58,550 --> 00:31:59,685 I guarantee it! Please. 772 00:31:59,718 --> 00:32:02,521 Weren't you ever a kid with a dream 773 00:32:02,554 --> 00:32:04,256 of making something of yourself? 774 00:32:04,290 --> 00:32:05,424 ( sighing ) 775 00:32:08,560 --> 00:32:11,263 ( chuckling ): "Clowns"? 776 00:32:11,297 --> 00:32:12,264 "Beanstalks"? 777 00:32:12,298 --> 00:32:15,101 What the hell is this? 778 00:32:15,134 --> 00:32:17,436 This is a guaranteed gold record! 779 00:32:17,469 --> 00:32:20,039 * Clowns never laughed before * 780 00:32:20,072 --> 00:32:21,540 * And beanstalks... 781 00:32:21,573 --> 00:32:23,175 No. 782 00:32:23,209 --> 00:32:25,444 Look, what did you say 783 00:32:25,477 --> 00:32:26,678 your name was again? 784 00:32:26,712 --> 00:32:28,514 Bravo... Johnny Bravo. 785 00:32:28,547 --> 00:32:29,548 Listen... 786 00:32:29,581 --> 00:32:30,682 "Bravo..." 787 00:32:30,716 --> 00:32:33,352 today's sound is raw, with an edge. 788 00:32:33,385 --> 00:32:35,721 Seattle... grunge... garage bands... 789 00:32:35,754 --> 00:32:38,590 Don't they have beanstalks in Seattle? 790 00:32:38,624 --> 00:32:40,659 ( door slams ) 791 00:32:40,692 --> 00:32:44,130 Well, hey, there, groovy chick. 792 00:32:44,163 --> 00:32:46,632 Mmm... uh-uh. 793 00:32:46,665 --> 00:32:48,200 Yeah. It went fabulous. 794 00:32:48,234 --> 00:32:50,436 Put the head back on, Fletcher. 795 00:32:50,469 --> 00:32:52,471 Listen, I am closing in on the, uh... 796 00:32:52,504 --> 00:32:53,739 on the Bradys, though. 797 00:32:53,772 --> 00:32:54,540 ( phone rings ) 798 00:32:54,573 --> 00:32:56,208 Can I call you back, Mr. Feldman? 799 00:32:56,242 --> 00:32:57,409 My car phone's ringing. 800 00:32:59,711 --> 00:33:01,213 Hello. 801 00:33:01,247 --> 00:33:02,748 WOMAN: Hello. I'm calling from a marketing firm. 802 00:33:02,781 --> 00:33:05,384 We'd just like a few minutes of your time... 803 00:33:05,417 --> 00:33:06,418 Ow! 804 00:33:06,452 --> 00:33:08,154 ( groaning ) 805 00:33:08,187 --> 00:33:10,556 Do you ever use pens and pencils? 806 00:33:10,589 --> 00:33:12,058 I know you do... 807 00:33:13,592 --> 00:33:15,561 Oh, hi, Mrs. Dittmeyer! 808 00:33:15,594 --> 00:33:18,097 I'm here to see Eric. 809 00:33:18,130 --> 00:33:19,098 Oh, hi, Greggie. 810 00:33:19,131 --> 00:33:21,400 Oh, Greg... 811 00:33:21,433 --> 00:33:22,601 I'm so glad you're here. 812 00:33:22,634 --> 00:33:24,470 I've got some more of your mail. 813 00:33:24,503 --> 00:33:25,571 ( chuckling ): Oh. 814 00:33:25,604 --> 00:33:27,606 Oh, gee, your hands are full. 815 00:33:27,639 --> 00:33:29,275 Let me just... 816 00:33:31,743 --> 00:33:33,312 My, you've... 817 00:33:33,345 --> 00:33:34,346 gotten so big. 818 00:33:34,380 --> 00:33:36,582 You're almost as big as your daddy. 819 00:33:36,615 --> 00:33:38,584 And I'm still growing. 820 00:33:38,617 --> 00:33:41,153 Right... before my very eyes. 821 00:33:42,654 --> 00:33:44,590 Your pants are... so tight. 822 00:33:44,623 --> 00:33:45,791 Hey, Mrs. Dittmeyer. 823 00:33:45,824 --> 00:33:46,792 Peter! 824 00:33:46,825 --> 00:33:48,560 Can I mow your lawn? 825 00:33:48,594 --> 00:33:51,297 I'm trying to earn some extra money. 826 00:33:51,330 --> 00:33:52,598 Sure. 827 00:33:52,631 --> 00:33:54,800 ( chuckling ): Two Bradys... 828 00:33:54,833 --> 00:33:57,136 Tell you what-- when you boys are done, 829 00:33:57,169 --> 00:34:00,206 why don't you come inside and help me make a sandwich? 830 00:34:09,515 --> 00:34:12,318 Penny for your thoughts. 831 00:34:12,351 --> 00:34:14,820 How about 20,000 of them? 832 00:34:14,853 --> 00:34:17,389 You're worried about the house, aren't you? 833 00:34:17,423 --> 00:34:19,691 I told you I'd take care of everything. 834 00:34:22,161 --> 00:34:25,431 Oh, Mike, it's just that we're so happy here. 835 00:34:25,464 --> 00:34:27,533 I sure would miss our kitchen 836 00:34:27,566 --> 00:34:28,734 and our garden... 837 00:34:28,767 --> 00:34:29,835 and Alice! 838 00:34:29,868 --> 00:34:30,702 If we lose her, 839 00:34:30,736 --> 00:34:32,604 who'll make the lunches I pass out? 840 00:34:32,638 --> 00:34:34,240 And who'll answer the phone: 841 00:34:34,273 --> 00:34:35,841 ( imitating Alice ): "Brady residence." 842 00:34:35,874 --> 00:34:37,376 And who'll help me... 843 00:34:37,409 --> 00:34:41,480 Honey, Alice isn't going anywhere, and neither are we. 844 00:34:41,513 --> 00:34:45,751 Besides, she doesn't do everything around her. 845 00:34:48,587 --> 00:34:52,124 Time to put your bookmark in, Mr. Brady. 846 00:34:56,895 --> 00:34:59,231 ( snoring ) 847 00:35:02,434 --> 00:35:07,273 I sure am glad your mom let you sleep over 848 00:35:07,306 --> 00:35:09,141 on a school night. 849 00:35:09,175 --> 00:35:13,212 Marcia, I have to tell you something. 850 00:35:13,245 --> 00:35:14,613 Hmm? 851 00:35:14,646 --> 00:35:19,651 You are the prettiest girl in the entire school. 852 00:35:19,685 --> 00:35:21,253 I know. 853 00:35:21,287 --> 00:35:25,557 But how can I use my good looks and sparkling personality 854 00:35:25,591 --> 00:35:28,194 to make money and save our house? 855 00:35:29,795 --> 00:35:31,763 That's it! 856 00:35:31,797 --> 00:35:35,401 I could be a teen model! 857 00:35:35,434 --> 00:35:36,902 Oh, thanks, Noreen! 858 00:35:36,935 --> 00:35:38,937 You're the greatest! 859 00:35:38,970 --> 00:35:40,672 Oh... 860 00:35:42,774 --> 00:35:44,310 Noreen? 861 00:35:44,343 --> 00:35:45,411 Hmm? 862 00:35:45,444 --> 00:35:46,878 Is that you? 863 00:35:46,912 --> 00:35:48,214 Oh! Oh, I'm sorry. 864 00:35:48,247 --> 00:35:50,216 I thought that was my leg. 865 00:35:50,249 --> 00:35:51,483 Oh... 866 00:35:51,517 --> 00:35:53,319 Night. 867 00:35:53,352 --> 00:35:55,287 Sweet dreams, Marcia. 868 00:36:00,692 --> 00:36:03,729 I still don't know why you had to tag along. 869 00:36:03,762 --> 00:36:04,863 This is my thing. 870 00:36:04,896 --> 00:36:09,301 You're not the only one who can be a model, you know. 871 00:36:10,536 --> 00:36:13,539 Ooh... those are pretty pictures. 872 00:36:13,572 --> 00:36:15,941 What have you modeled for? 873 00:36:15,974 --> 00:36:17,943 Guess. 874 00:36:17,976 --> 00:36:21,947 Um... are you a Breck girl? 875 00:36:21,980 --> 00:36:23,282 No. "Guess" jeans. 876 00:36:23,315 --> 00:36:25,351 Okay, um... 877 00:36:25,384 --> 00:36:27,319 Levis... Wrangler... 878 00:36:27,353 --> 00:36:29,521 Oshkosh B'Gosh? 879 00:36:29,555 --> 00:36:30,589 WOMAN: Brady girls? 880 00:36:30,622 --> 00:36:32,324 That's us. 881 00:36:32,358 --> 00:36:34,826 So... you're professional models? 882 00:36:34,860 --> 00:36:37,463 Yes, we are! Of course! 883 00:36:37,496 --> 00:36:39,698 So, what do you have to show me? 884 00:36:39,731 --> 00:36:41,300 Plenty. 885 00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:46,204 ( exotic music playing ) 886 00:37:00,919 --> 00:37:02,854 ( stops music ) 887 00:37:04,022 --> 00:37:05,724 Oh... 888 00:37:05,757 --> 00:37:07,526 Why don't we take five? 889 00:37:07,559 --> 00:37:08,894 You. 890 00:37:09,995 --> 00:37:11,530 Wow... 891 00:37:15,801 --> 00:37:17,035 Thank you! 892 00:37:17,068 --> 00:37:18,704 Why does everyone always choose Marcia?! 893 00:37:18,737 --> 00:37:20,572 What does she have that I don't have?! 894 00:37:20,606 --> 00:37:24,376 Now, Marcia, I may be able to use you, 895 00:37:24,410 --> 00:37:26,712 but first, you're going to have to do 896 00:37:26,745 --> 00:37:28,447 a little work on yourself. 897 00:37:28,480 --> 00:37:30,916 You mean like walking with a book on my head? 898 00:37:30,949 --> 00:37:32,918 No. I mean like cutting that mousy hair, 899 00:37:32,951 --> 00:37:33,952 capping those teeth 900 00:37:33,985 --> 00:37:36,788 and losing about 30 pounds, my little sausage. 901 00:37:36,822 --> 00:37:38,790 How do you feel about 902 00:37:38,824 --> 00:37:40,892 breast implants? 903 00:37:40,926 --> 00:37:43,695 Cut my hair?! 904 00:37:43,729 --> 00:37:44,963 ( sighing ) 905 00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:51,637 And, after much consideration, Mr. Swanson, 906 00:37:51,670 --> 00:37:54,940 I designed a structure especially for your needs. 907 00:37:54,973 --> 00:37:56,475 So, what do you think? 908 00:37:56,508 --> 00:37:59,345 SWANSON: Well, it's just too good a design 909 00:37:59,378 --> 00:38:00,946 for a fast food joint. 910 00:38:00,979 --> 00:38:03,081 You see what I'm saying, Phillips? 911 00:38:03,114 --> 00:38:06,452 This is... I think you're pumping a dry well here. 912 00:38:06,485 --> 00:38:08,454 You understand what I'm saying? 913 00:38:08,487 --> 00:38:09,087 All right. 914 00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:10,356 I'll be in touch with you. 915 00:38:10,389 --> 00:38:11,557 Sorry, Mikey. 916 00:38:13,359 --> 00:38:15,994 Well... strike two. 917 00:38:19,565 --> 00:38:23,902 There's got to be a way to make $20,000. 918 00:38:25,771 --> 00:38:26,672 Hey! 919 00:38:26,705 --> 00:38:29,375 "Search for the Stars is looking 920 00:38:29,408 --> 00:38:31,343 "for fresh young musical acts. 921 00:38:31,377 --> 00:38:34,513 First prize: $20,000." 922 00:38:34,546 --> 00:38:35,781 Hmm... 923 00:38:35,814 --> 00:38:38,417 Too bad I'm not a musical act. 924 00:38:38,450 --> 00:38:40,752 Hey, Marcia! 925 00:38:40,786 --> 00:38:44,790 I'm not Marcia! I'm Jan! 926 00:38:44,823 --> 00:38:46,124 The usual, Sam. 927 00:38:46,157 --> 00:38:47,893 Sure thing, Mrs. Brady. 928 00:38:47,926 --> 00:38:50,462 20 pounds of ground round coming right up. 929 00:38:50,496 --> 00:38:52,398 Carol, are you still eating red meat? 930 00:38:52,431 --> 00:38:54,533 Why, of course! I've got growing kids! 931 00:38:54,566 --> 00:38:56,602 I have to think about their health! 932 00:38:56,635 --> 00:38:57,936 Isn't Sam 933 00:38:57,969 --> 00:38:59,438 the best? 934 00:38:59,471 --> 00:39:01,407 We're sure going to miss this place when we move, 935 00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:02,040 won't we? 936 00:39:02,073 --> 00:39:03,542 Oh, we're not moving. 937 00:39:03,575 --> 00:39:05,811 You're not? I thought everyone on the block was. 938 00:39:05,844 --> 00:39:07,913 Mike says there's no reason to sell. 939 00:39:07,946 --> 00:39:09,381 We'll be here forever. 940 00:39:09,415 --> 00:39:11,417 There you go, Mrs. Brady. 941 00:39:11,450 --> 00:39:14,019 Thanks, Sam. 942 00:39:14,052 --> 00:39:16,388 Have a nice day. 943 00:39:16,422 --> 00:39:17,689 Bye, Sam. 944 00:39:17,723 --> 00:39:19,057 Bye. 945 00:39:24,496 --> 00:39:26,965 Marcia, could you call the troops to dinner? 946 00:39:26,998 --> 00:39:28,400 In a second. 947 00:39:28,434 --> 00:39:30,936 I'm just checking for a letter from Davy Jones. 948 00:39:30,969 --> 00:39:32,003 Nothing. 949 00:39:32,037 --> 00:39:35,774 Oh, Alice, if I don't get an answer from him soon, 950 00:39:35,807 --> 00:39:39,044 I'll be the most humiliated girl in the world. 951 00:39:39,077 --> 00:39:42,914 You think waiting three weeks for an answer is rough? 952 00:39:42,948 --> 00:39:45,684 Try waiting 20 years for the question. 953 00:39:45,717 --> 00:39:48,420 Alice. 954 00:39:49,821 --> 00:39:52,057 Hey, Greg, you're the Casanova of Clinton Avenue. 955 00:39:52,090 --> 00:39:53,625 How can I get Holly to go for me? 956 00:39:53,659 --> 00:39:55,994 Well, chicks love compliments, man. 957 00:39:56,027 --> 00:39:57,829 Just tell her how groovy she is. 958 00:39:57,863 --> 00:39:58,997 And that really works? 959 00:39:59,030 --> 00:40:00,832 Trust me. It always gets a reaction. 960 00:40:00,866 --> 00:40:02,668 Now, throw me a pass. 961 00:40:02,701 --> 00:40:05,904 24, 32, set, hike. 962 00:40:08,774 --> 00:40:10,742 Dinner's ready... Ooh, my nose! 963 00:40:12,544 --> 00:40:13,845 Are you all right? 964 00:40:13,879 --> 00:40:15,847 Oh, gee, I'm sorry, Marcia. 965 00:40:15,881 --> 00:40:17,082 Yeah, me, too. 966 00:40:17,115 --> 00:40:19,685 CAROL: Let's have a look, Marcia. 967 00:40:22,954 --> 00:40:25,524 I look awful, just awful. 968 00:40:25,557 --> 00:40:29,728 I can never show my face in school again. 969 00:40:29,761 --> 00:40:30,929 I'm ruined. 970 00:40:30,962 --> 00:40:33,999 Sweetheart, I know you feel terrible, 971 00:40:34,032 --> 00:40:36,635 but it's going to get better. 972 00:40:36,668 --> 00:40:39,237 I'm sure no one will ever notice. 973 00:40:39,270 --> 00:40:40,872 Oh, my goodness. 974 00:40:40,906 --> 00:40:42,941 What happened to your...? 975 00:40:45,076 --> 00:40:46,945 mother's favorite picture? 976 00:40:46,978 --> 00:40:48,079 It's crooked. 977 00:40:48,113 --> 00:40:50,015 I mean the painting's crooked. 978 00:40:50,048 --> 00:40:52,484 I think I'd better go. 979 00:40:52,518 --> 00:40:53,885 I think I hear the nose boy. 980 00:40:53,919 --> 00:40:55,020 I mean the newsboy. 981 00:40:55,053 --> 00:40:57,856 Oh, boy, did I blow it. 982 00:40:59,925 --> 00:41:02,060 Now I'll never be a teen model. 983 00:41:02,093 --> 00:41:03,662 I'll never be anything. 984 00:41:03,695 --> 00:41:05,564 What's the point of living? 985 00:41:05,597 --> 00:41:06,965 I might as well die. 986 00:41:12,103 --> 00:41:14,806 Don't forget my $10 reward money. 987 00:41:14,840 --> 00:41:17,543 I made more than you-- almost $12. 988 00:41:17,576 --> 00:41:20,512 Well, I got $15 from Mrs. Dittmeyer. 989 00:41:20,546 --> 00:41:22,648 Boy, is she a good tipper. 990 00:41:22,681 --> 00:41:25,751 But we're still nowhere near $20,000. 991 00:41:25,784 --> 00:41:27,619 This is just awful. 992 00:41:27,653 --> 00:41:29,054 You can say that again. 993 00:41:29,087 --> 00:41:30,922 Tonight's the school dance 994 00:41:30,956 --> 00:41:33,559 and my nose still hasn't gone down. 995 00:41:34,693 --> 00:41:36,027 Hey, I saw something 996 00:41:36,061 --> 00:41:38,697 on the bulletin board at school 997 00:41:38,730 --> 00:41:41,032 about a "Search for the Stars" contest. 998 00:41:41,066 --> 00:41:43,034 They're looking for fresh, 999 00:41:43,068 --> 00:41:44,703 young musical groups. 1000 00:41:44,736 --> 00:41:46,972 First prize is exactly $20,000. 1001 00:41:47,005 --> 00:41:48,940 Oh, sure, Jan, like we'd really win. 1002 00:41:48,974 --> 00:41:49,741 Oh, Jan... 1003 00:41:49,775 --> 00:41:51,209 We'd never have a chance of winning. 1004 00:41:51,242 --> 00:41:52,043 We might as well rob a bank. 1005 00:41:52,077 --> 00:41:53,945 Guys, there's no point in fighting. 1006 00:41:53,979 --> 00:41:55,681 We're running out of time, and we still have to find 1007 00:41:55,714 --> 00:41:57,315 a way out of this mess. 1008 00:41:57,348 --> 00:41:59,951 I sure am going to miss this house. 1009 00:41:59,985 --> 00:42:01,052 Uh-oh. 1010 00:42:01,086 --> 00:42:03,154 Here comes Mom and Dad. 1011 00:42:03,188 --> 00:42:05,090 All right, now, remember, everyone, act happy. 1012 00:42:05,123 --> 00:42:06,124 We can't let on 1013 00:42:06,157 --> 00:42:07,659 that we know anything. 1014 00:42:07,693 --> 00:42:11,129 ( all laughing ) 1015 00:42:11,162 --> 00:42:16,234 Mike, you don't think the kids suspect anything, do you? 1016 00:42:16,267 --> 00:42:18,303 Oh, no, of course not. 1017 00:42:18,336 --> 00:42:22,974 Well, just to make sure, we should act extra happy. 1018 00:42:23,008 --> 00:42:27,078 Well, you know what makes us the happiest. 1019 00:42:27,112 --> 00:42:28,747 ALL: Potato sack race! 1020 00:42:28,780 --> 00:42:30,081 ALICE: Get ready... 1021 00:42:30,115 --> 00:42:31,149 get set... 1022 00:42:31,182 --> 00:42:32,851 go! 1023 00:42:32,884 --> 00:42:35,621 ( all cheering ) 1024 00:42:35,654 --> 00:42:36,988 So, what can I do you for? 1025 00:42:37,022 --> 00:42:38,056 You can explain to me 1026 00:42:38,089 --> 00:42:40,091 what Mrs. Brady told my wife. 1027 00:42:40,125 --> 00:42:42,160 Yeah, if Mike Brady won't sell, 1028 00:42:42,193 --> 00:42:44,596 we're all screwed. 1029 00:42:44,630 --> 00:42:46,765 Well, allow me to take this opportunity 1030 00:42:46,798 --> 00:42:48,133 to set the record straight. 1031 00:42:48,166 --> 00:42:50,902 The Bradys are selling, my clients are buying 1032 00:42:50,936 --> 00:42:53,171 and you are all making out like bandits. 1033 00:42:53,204 --> 00:42:55,641 Scotch, Steve? Are you calling my wife a liar? 1034 00:42:55,674 --> 00:42:56,975 Steve, no. 1035 00:42:57,008 --> 00:42:59,611 I'm just saying you can't believe the Bradys. 1036 00:42:59,645 --> 00:43:02,981 You've all seen the insane stuff that goes on over there. 1037 00:43:03,014 --> 00:43:05,183 How about this Astroturf lawn 1038 00:43:05,216 --> 00:43:07,619 they treat like real grass, huh? 1039 00:43:07,653 --> 00:43:08,954 And, excuse me... 1040 00:43:08,987 --> 00:43:11,890 the family that's happy all the time? 1041 00:43:11,923 --> 00:43:13,024 Not possible. 1042 00:43:13,058 --> 00:43:16,394 It is strange how they spend their weekends-- 1043 00:43:16,427 --> 00:43:18,830 hopping around in potato sacks. 1044 00:43:18,864 --> 00:43:20,365 And you know something? Yeah. 1045 00:43:20,398 --> 00:43:23,101 I hear that their maid works for free. 1046 00:43:23,134 --> 00:43:25,070 Can you understand that? 1047 00:43:25,103 --> 00:43:26,204 No. I can't. No. 1048 00:43:26,237 --> 00:43:28,073 You know, I was over there once. 1049 00:43:28,106 --> 00:43:30,141 One bathroom for nine people? 1050 00:43:30,175 --> 00:43:31,409 Get out of here. Oh, stop, please. 1051 00:43:31,442 --> 00:43:33,712 And I never did see a toilet. 1052 00:43:33,745 --> 00:43:36,414 Please, they've got to put it somewhere. 1053 00:43:36,447 --> 00:43:37,749 Come on. 1054 00:43:37,783 --> 00:43:39,184 I rest my case. 1055 00:43:40,218 --> 00:43:41,987 ( doorbell rings ) 1056 00:43:42,020 --> 00:43:43,989 Hi. I'm Doug Simpson. 1057 00:43:44,022 --> 00:43:45,290 Marcia's date? 1058 00:43:45,323 --> 00:43:48,059 Oh, right-- the big man on campus. 1059 00:43:48,093 --> 00:43:49,194 Come on in, Doug. 1060 00:43:49,227 --> 00:43:51,129 Marcia, Doug's here! 1061 00:43:52,731 --> 00:43:54,165 CAROL: Hi, Doug. 1062 00:43:54,199 --> 00:43:57,102 Big man on campus, huh? 1063 00:43:57,135 --> 00:43:59,070 Yeah, right. 1064 00:44:03,141 --> 00:44:04,676 Hi, Doug. 1065 00:44:04,710 --> 00:44:06,011 Hi, Marcia. 1066 00:44:06,044 --> 00:44:07,245 Is anything wrong? 1067 00:44:09,014 --> 00:44:11,316 Sweetheart, I think you better show him. 1068 00:44:19,057 --> 00:44:21,927 I suppose you don't want to go out with me now, huh? 1069 00:44:21,960 --> 00:44:23,261 Oh, of course I do. 1070 00:44:23,294 --> 00:44:25,096 It's not your nose I'm after. 1071 00:44:27,332 --> 00:44:29,134 That's a fine boy 1072 00:44:29,167 --> 00:44:31,069 Marcia's got there. 1073 00:44:31,102 --> 00:44:32,938 Oh, Marcia, it looks like rain. 1074 00:44:32,971 --> 00:44:34,806 You better take your shawl. 1075 00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:36,007 Thanks. 1076 00:44:36,041 --> 00:44:37,375 Uh, Doug, how about you? 1077 00:44:37,408 --> 00:44:39,878 Do you have any protection? 1078 00:44:39,911 --> 00:44:40,979 Oh, yes, ma'am. 1079 00:44:41,012 --> 00:44:42,914 Assorted colors and textures. 1080 00:44:42,948 --> 00:44:44,182 Good for you. 1081 00:44:44,215 --> 00:44:46,117 MIKE: Have fun, kids. 1082 00:44:46,151 --> 00:44:47,919 Bye-bye. 1083 00:44:47,953 --> 00:44:51,189 * Are you coming with me? 1084 00:44:53,258 --> 00:44:56,161 But, Doug, this isn't the school dance. 1085 00:44:56,194 --> 00:44:59,264 I just figured we'd come up here and unwind a little bit 1086 00:44:59,297 --> 00:45:00,431 before we go down. 1087 00:45:00,465 --> 00:45:02,734 Mind if I change the station? 1088 00:45:05,236 --> 00:45:06,938 ( blowing ) 1089 00:45:06,972 --> 00:45:08,840 Oh, it is windy tonight. 1090 00:45:08,874 --> 00:45:11,276 Maybe we should put the top up. 1091 00:45:11,309 --> 00:45:13,311 I'll keep you warm, Marcia. 1092 00:45:13,344 --> 00:45:14,813 Uh... 1093 00:45:14,846 --> 00:45:17,115 Doug, your hand is on my shoulder. 1094 00:45:17,148 --> 00:45:18,383 So? 1095 00:45:18,416 --> 00:45:22,320 Well, that's third base, and I don't go that far. 1096 00:45:24,089 --> 00:45:27,325 Doug, I think I just felt your tongue in my mouth. 1097 00:45:27,358 --> 00:45:29,027 That's called a French kiss, Marcia. 1098 00:45:29,060 --> 00:45:31,930 I thought you were from Nebraska. 1099 00:45:31,963 --> 00:45:32,964 I am. 1100 00:45:32,998 --> 00:45:35,767 Listen, Doug, I don't know what you were thinking, 1101 00:45:35,801 --> 00:45:37,435 but I don't do things like that. 1102 00:45:37,468 --> 00:45:39,204 You may live your life one way, 1103 00:45:39,237 --> 00:45:41,973 but we Bradys follow our own drummer. 1104 00:45:42,007 --> 00:45:45,276 So, I hope this doesn't sour the rest of our date. 1105 00:45:47,312 --> 00:45:49,948 You Bradys suck! 1106 00:45:57,188 --> 00:45:58,323 Excuse me. 1107 00:45:58,356 --> 00:45:59,490 Oh, no, thank you. 1108 00:45:59,524 --> 00:46:01,827 I don't take rides from strangers. 1109 00:46:01,860 --> 00:46:03,261 I was just wondering 1110 00:46:03,294 --> 00:46:05,496 how to get to West Dale High School. 1111 00:46:05,530 --> 00:46:07,198 West Dale High? 1112 00:46:07,232 --> 00:46:09,100 * How do you do? 1113 00:46:09,134 --> 00:46:10,335 * Yeah 1114 00:46:10,368 --> 00:46:12,770 ( rock music playing ) 1115 00:46:20,545 --> 00:46:22,447 * So now I'm pissed off 1116 00:46:22,480 --> 00:46:24,415 * My head is a twist-off 1117 00:46:24,449 --> 00:46:26,251 * I never have been cute 1118 00:46:26,284 --> 00:46:29,587 * I need more money 'cause my life is crummy * 1119 00:46:29,620 --> 00:46:32,190 * And get that stuff off my shoe * 1120 00:46:32,223 --> 00:46:36,261 * It is a cruel world, I'm no schoolgirl * 1121 00:46:36,294 --> 00:46:38,096 * I never do what I should 1122 00:46:38,129 --> 00:46:41,099 * And they never know, it's about to blow... * 1123 00:46:41,132 --> 00:46:42,600 Hey, you're one groovy chick. 1124 00:46:42,633 --> 00:46:45,303 You're really happening in a far-out way. 1125 00:46:45,336 --> 00:46:47,939 ( laughing ): Thanks. 1126 00:46:47,973 --> 00:46:49,908 ( song continues in background) 1127 00:46:58,616 --> 00:47:00,018 ( laughs ) 1128 00:47:04,189 --> 00:47:05,356 ( gasps ) 1129 00:47:05,390 --> 00:47:06,524 ( moans ) 1130 00:47:06,557 --> 00:47:08,359 Peter! 1131 00:47:18,436 --> 00:47:19,504 Yeah! 1132 00:47:19,537 --> 00:47:21,506 ( applause and cheering ) 1133 00:47:28,446 --> 00:47:29,480 Excuse me. 1134 00:47:29,514 --> 00:47:31,482 Can I have your attention, please? 1135 00:47:31,516 --> 00:47:34,319 You may all know me as Greg Brady, 1136 00:47:34,352 --> 00:47:37,222 but tonight, I'd like to introduce you to... 1137 00:47:37,255 --> 00:47:39,190 Johnny Bravo! 1138 00:47:41,059 --> 00:47:43,394 ( plays out of tune chords ) 1139 00:47:44,395 --> 00:47:45,330 For my first song, 1140 00:47:45,363 --> 00:47:47,365 I'd like to sing a number I wrote 1141 00:47:47,398 --> 00:47:50,035 for the grooviest chick at West Dale High. 1142 00:47:50,068 --> 00:47:51,369 ( people screaming ) 1143 00:47:51,402 --> 00:47:52,303 One, two 1144 00:47:52,337 --> 00:47:54,339 three, four... 1145 00:47:54,372 --> 00:47:58,109 * Clowns never laughed before 1146 00:47:58,143 --> 00:48:01,479 * Beanstalks never grew 1147 00:48:01,512 --> 00:48:04,983 * Ponies never ran before 1148 00:48:05,016 --> 00:48:09,054 ( punk music drowning out song) 1149 00:48:14,025 --> 00:48:16,928 Ah-ha-ha-ha! 1150 00:48:19,998 --> 00:48:23,268 * Does it scare you 1151 00:48:23,301 --> 00:48:24,402 * When you see me lose my mind... * 1152 00:48:24,435 --> 00:48:25,470 ( gasps ) 1153 00:48:25,503 --> 00:48:26,471 * I go crazy... 1154 00:48:26,504 --> 00:48:27,973 Hi, everybody. 1155 00:48:28,006 --> 00:48:29,975 It's the new Jan Brady. 1156 00:48:30,008 --> 00:48:32,978 Am I a hit? 1157 00:48:33,011 --> 00:48:34,445 Do you like it? 1158 00:48:34,479 --> 00:48:36,447 ( yelling ) 1159 00:48:36,481 --> 00:48:38,683 ( music stops ) 1160 00:48:38,716 --> 00:48:40,485 Hmm. 1161 00:48:40,518 --> 00:48:42,988 Wow. It worked. 1162 00:48:43,021 --> 00:48:45,356 I really did make a splash. 1163 00:48:46,424 --> 00:48:48,526 Can I have your attention, please? 1164 00:48:48,559 --> 00:48:49,560 I have some news 1165 00:48:49,594 --> 00:48:51,562 that's going to make everyone flip. 1166 00:48:51,596 --> 00:48:53,431 Hey... what about me? 1167 00:48:53,464 --> 00:48:55,100 I thought he might show up, 1168 00:48:55,133 --> 00:48:57,268 but I didn't want to get all your hopes up. 1169 00:48:57,302 --> 00:48:59,470 Marcia did it again. 1170 00:48:59,504 --> 00:49:01,739 Marcia, Marcia, Marcia! 1171 00:49:01,772 --> 00:49:04,009 But here he is-- 1172 00:49:04,042 --> 00:49:05,410 Davy Jones! 1173 00:49:05,443 --> 00:49:07,312 ( one person clapping ) 1174 00:49:07,345 --> 00:49:08,413 BOY: Hey, Grandpa... 1175 00:49:08,446 --> 00:49:09,547 GIRL: Oh, man! 1176 00:49:09,580 --> 00:49:11,983 Thanks a lot for being here, Davy... 1177 00:49:12,017 --> 00:49:13,684 I mean, Mr. Jones. 1178 00:49:13,718 --> 00:49:16,554 Anything for my number-one fan. 1179 00:49:16,587 --> 00:49:18,489 ( cooing and gasping ) 1180 00:49:20,158 --> 00:49:23,995 ( pop music piano introduction) 1181 00:49:28,133 --> 00:49:30,135 * Girl 1182 00:49:30,168 --> 00:49:33,038 * Look what you've done to me 1183 00:49:33,071 --> 00:49:35,140 Look, it really is Davy Jones! 1184 00:49:35,173 --> 00:49:36,307 * Me 1185 00:49:37,442 --> 00:49:39,477 * And my whole world 1186 00:49:42,580 --> 00:49:44,549 * Girl 1187 00:49:44,582 --> 00:49:45,616 * You've brought 1188 00:49:45,650 --> 00:49:48,786 * The sun to me 1189 00:49:48,819 --> 00:49:52,323 * With your smile 1190 00:49:52,357 --> 00:49:54,592 * You did it, girl 1191 00:49:54,625 --> 00:49:56,261 ( loud rock music joining in) 1192 00:49:56,294 --> 00:49:59,230 * I'm telling you, girl 1193 00:49:59,264 --> 00:50:00,465 * Something not 1194 00:50:00,498 --> 00:50:02,700 * Known to me 1195 00:50:03,834 --> 00:50:05,570 * Makes 1196 00:50:05,603 --> 00:50:07,538 * You what you are... 1197 00:50:07,572 --> 00:50:09,040 Hi, Charlie. 1198 00:50:09,074 --> 00:50:10,275 Hey, Marcia. 1199 00:50:10,308 --> 00:50:12,443 It was rude of me to break our date. 1200 00:50:12,477 --> 00:50:14,612 How can I make it up to you? 1201 00:50:14,645 --> 00:50:18,449 Well, uh... gee, Marcia, how about a dance? 1202 00:50:18,483 --> 00:50:21,352 Why, I'd love to, Charlie Anderson. 1203 00:50:21,386 --> 00:50:24,689 * ...that way, girl 1204 00:50:24,722 --> 00:50:26,357 * Thank you, girl 1205 00:50:26,391 --> 00:50:29,194 * For making the morning brighter * 1206 00:50:29,227 --> 00:50:30,328 * Girl 1207 00:50:30,361 --> 00:50:32,630 * For making the nighttime nicer * 1208 00:50:32,663 --> 00:50:33,631 * Girl 1209 00:50:33,664 --> 00:50:36,101 * For making a better world 1210 00:50:36,134 --> 00:50:38,636 * For me 1211 00:50:38,669 --> 00:50:41,272 * I'm telling you, girl 1212 00:50:42,473 --> 00:50:45,476 * Something unknown to me 1213 00:50:47,312 --> 00:50:48,446 * Makes 1214 00:50:49,680 --> 00:50:52,517 * You what you are 1215 00:50:53,584 --> 00:50:56,421 * And what you are 1216 00:50:56,454 --> 00:50:59,590 * Is all that I want for me 1217 00:51:00,891 --> 00:51:02,393 * And it's good 1218 00:51:02,427 --> 00:51:07,532 * To feel that way, girl 1219 00:51:07,565 --> 00:51:08,866 * Thank you, girl 1220 00:51:08,899 --> 00:51:12,370 * For making the winter warmer 1221 00:51:12,403 --> 00:51:13,404 * Girl 1222 00:51:13,438 --> 00:51:16,241 * For making the music softer 1223 00:51:16,274 --> 00:51:17,408 * Girl 1224 00:51:17,442 --> 00:51:21,179 * For making a better world for me * 1225 00:51:21,212 --> 00:51:23,481 ( shrieking guitar riff ) 1226 00:51:34,192 --> 00:51:37,695 * And what you are 1227 00:51:37,728 --> 00:51:42,633 * Is all that I want for me 1228 00:51:42,667 --> 00:51:44,435 * And it's good 1229 00:51:44,469 --> 00:51:47,638 * To feel that way, girl 1230 00:51:47,672 --> 00:51:49,874 ( moaning and shrieking ) 1231 00:51:49,907 --> 00:51:51,476 * Thank you, girl 1232 00:51:53,744 --> 00:51:55,780 * Thank you, girl 1233 00:51:56,847 --> 00:52:00,651 * Thank you, girl... 1234 00:52:00,685 --> 00:52:04,155 ( cheering ) 1235 00:52:08,693 --> 00:52:11,629 ( wild cheering and applause) 1236 00:52:15,866 --> 00:52:17,902 Hey, where are you going? 1237 00:52:17,935 --> 00:52:20,438 Something suddenly came up. 1238 00:52:22,607 --> 00:52:25,310 Hey, Marcia, you looked great up there. 1239 00:52:25,343 --> 00:52:26,744 Thanks, Noreen. 1240 00:52:28,346 --> 00:52:30,681 Hey, Marcia, you got a sec? 1241 00:52:30,715 --> 00:52:32,417 Forget it, Doug. 1242 00:52:32,450 --> 00:52:33,718 Even with a swollen nose, 1243 00:52:33,751 --> 00:52:35,420 I can still smell a rat. 1244 00:52:40,591 --> 00:52:41,759 Slut. 1245 00:52:46,764 --> 00:52:49,567 Um... Marcia, would you get our coats. 1246 00:52:49,600 --> 00:52:52,303 I have a little, uh... matter to discuss. 1247 00:52:53,371 --> 00:52:54,572 Sure, Charlie. 1248 00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:57,275 Hey... 1249 00:52:57,308 --> 00:52:58,743 I heard what you said, Doug... 1250 00:52:58,776 --> 00:53:01,812 and I'm not going to let you talk to Marcia like that. 1251 00:53:01,846 --> 00:53:02,947 Yeah? 1252 00:53:02,980 --> 00:53:04,749 Yeah. Well, what are you going 1253 00:53:04,782 --> 00:53:05,950 to do about it, geek? 1254 00:53:05,983 --> 00:53:08,619 I-I'm going to... lose... 1255 00:53:09,854 --> 00:53:11,689 consciousness. Hey, Doug. 1256 00:53:13,324 --> 00:53:13,858 How's about 1257 00:53:13,891 --> 00:53:15,460 a little punch? 1258 00:53:20,365 --> 00:53:21,566 Is he dead? 1259 00:53:25,503 --> 00:53:26,937 Wow. 1260 00:53:26,971 --> 00:53:29,674 Charlie, thanks. 1261 00:53:35,446 --> 00:53:37,715 Couldn't have done it better myself. 1262 00:53:44,355 --> 00:53:45,623 Here. 1263 00:53:51,496 --> 00:53:53,631 Are you okay? 1264 00:54:00,338 --> 00:54:02,807 I really had a great time, Marcia. 1265 00:54:02,840 --> 00:54:04,842 Yeah, me, too, Charlie. 1266 00:54:04,875 --> 00:54:07,912 Well, uh... 1267 00:54:07,945 --> 00:54:10,014 Bye. Bye. 1268 00:54:10,047 --> 00:54:12,016 Uh, Marcia? 1269 00:54:12,049 --> 00:54:15,486 So, um... can, uh... 1270 00:54:15,520 --> 00:54:17,888 can I have a kiss good night? 1271 00:54:17,922 --> 00:54:19,624 Yeah. 1272 00:54:19,657 --> 00:54:21,359 Okay, Charlie. 1273 00:54:27,932 --> 00:54:29,434 Marcia... 1274 00:54:29,467 --> 00:54:32,370 I think I just felt your tongue in my mouth. 1275 00:54:32,403 --> 00:54:34,705 It's called a French kiss, Charlie. 1276 00:54:34,739 --> 00:54:36,974 Um... Marcia, I got to go. 1277 00:54:37,007 --> 00:54:39,944 Uh, something suddenly came up. 1278 00:54:44,482 --> 00:54:46,384 ( car pulling away ) 1279 00:54:57,462 --> 00:54:59,430 BOY: 32, 24, hike. 1280 00:54:59,464 --> 00:55:00,731 Dinner's ready. 1281 00:55:02,733 --> 00:55:04,902 Oh, my nose! 1282 00:55:04,935 --> 00:55:06,437 ( sighing ) 1283 00:55:08,906 --> 00:55:11,909 What a nice dream. 1284 00:55:11,942 --> 00:55:13,344 ( screams ) 1285 00:55:13,378 --> 00:55:15,846 Jan, what is it? 1286 00:55:15,880 --> 00:55:17,448 Has my nose gotten worse? 1287 00:55:17,482 --> 00:55:20,385 No. It's better. 1288 00:55:20,418 --> 00:55:22,387 ( gasps ) 1289 00:55:28,793 --> 00:55:31,862 The hardest thing about the health club business 1290 00:55:31,896 --> 00:55:34,365 is getting people to leave their house. 1291 00:55:34,399 --> 00:55:37,067 Well... what do you think? 1292 00:55:37,101 --> 00:55:38,469 I love it. 1293 00:55:38,503 --> 00:55:41,472 ( speaking Japanese ) 1294 00:55:41,506 --> 00:55:44,008 Consider yourself hired. 1295 00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:51,949 ( bat hits ball ) 1296 00:55:51,982 --> 00:55:54,051 ( stadium crowd cheers ) 1297 00:55:56,487 --> 00:55:57,488 Uh-huh. 1298 00:55:57,522 --> 00:55:59,156 You would? 1299 00:55:59,189 --> 00:56:00,958 I see. 1300 00:56:00,991 --> 00:56:02,727 Ahh. 1301 00:56:02,760 --> 00:56:05,029 All right. 1302 00:56:05,062 --> 00:56:06,464 ( growls ) 1303 00:56:12,737 --> 00:56:14,371 Mom, Dad? 1304 00:56:24,148 --> 00:56:26,751 Hey, why the gloom? 1305 00:56:26,784 --> 00:56:28,586 Well, we just had a kid meeting 1306 00:56:28,619 --> 00:56:29,887 and, well, we decided 1307 00:56:29,920 --> 00:56:32,457 that we don't mind if we have to move. 1308 00:56:32,490 --> 00:56:33,491 We tried 1309 00:56:33,524 --> 00:56:36,527 to raise the money for the tax bill ourselves, 1310 00:56:36,561 --> 00:56:38,529 but there are only two days left 1311 00:56:38,563 --> 00:56:40,931 and all we could come up with was $110. 1312 00:56:40,965 --> 00:56:42,533 What? 1313 00:56:42,567 --> 00:56:44,034 How did you know about the house 1314 00:56:44,068 --> 00:56:45,402 and the tax bill? 1315 00:56:48,105 --> 00:56:49,440 Oops! 1316 00:56:49,474 --> 00:56:50,941 Cindy, do I have to remind you 1317 00:56:50,975 --> 00:56:52,610 that when you tattle on somebody, 1318 00:56:52,643 --> 00:56:55,646 you're not just telling on them, you're telling on yourself 1319 00:56:55,680 --> 00:56:57,081 and... 1320 00:56:57,114 --> 00:56:59,817 ALL: Telling them that you're a tattletale. 1321 00:56:59,850 --> 00:57:01,519 We've heard it, Dad. Thanks. 1322 00:57:01,552 --> 00:57:04,989 Kids, you have nothing to worry about. 1323 00:57:05,022 --> 00:57:07,592 Today your father sold a design 1324 00:57:07,625 --> 00:57:11,028 and now he can get that $20,000 advance. 1325 00:57:11,061 --> 00:57:12,563 ( all exclaim ) 1326 00:57:12,597 --> 00:57:14,599 I appreciate what you all tried to do 1327 00:57:14,632 --> 00:57:16,467 and from now on, no more secrets. 1328 00:57:16,501 --> 00:57:18,235 The important thing is 1329 00:57:18,268 --> 00:57:19,504 we still have our home 1330 00:57:19,537 --> 00:57:20,838 so, let's celebrate. 1331 00:57:20,871 --> 00:57:22,773 Put on your Sunday best, kids. 1332 00:57:22,807 --> 00:57:24,074 We're going to Sears. 1333 00:57:24,108 --> 00:57:25,510 ( all exclaiming ) 1334 00:57:31,215 --> 00:57:34,819 * I think I'll go for a walk outside now * 1335 00:57:34,852 --> 00:57:37,121 * The summer sun's calling my name * 1336 00:57:37,154 --> 00:57:38,288 * I hear ya now * 1337 00:57:38,322 --> 00:57:42,026 * I just can't stay inside all day * 1338 00:57:42,059 --> 00:57:46,631 * I gotta get out, get me some of those rays * 1339 00:57:46,664 --> 00:57:48,265 * Everybody's smilin' * 1340 00:57:48,298 --> 00:57:50,100 * Sunshine day * 1341 00:57:50,134 --> 00:57:54,905 * Everybody seems so happy today * 1342 00:57:54,939 --> 00:57:56,574 * It's a sunshine day * 1343 00:57:56,607 --> 00:57:59,944 * I think I'll go for a walk outside now * 1344 00:57:59,977 --> 00:58:02,513 * The summer sun knows me by name * 1345 00:58:02,547 --> 00:58:03,648 * He's a-calling me... * 1346 00:58:03,681 --> 00:58:06,584 Hey, everybody, look at Alice. 1347 00:58:10,688 --> 00:58:11,756 Outtasight. 1348 00:58:11,789 --> 00:58:13,023 Neato. 1349 00:58:13,057 --> 00:58:15,626 And I thought Sam had magic fingers. 1350 00:58:15,660 --> 00:58:16,794 ( all laugh ) 1351 00:58:16,827 --> 00:58:19,296 ALL: Oh, Alice. 1352 00:58:19,329 --> 00:58:21,799 ( all laughing ) 1353 00:58:24,702 --> 00:58:25,970 Hey, everybody, look. 1354 00:58:26,003 --> 00:58:27,538 Come on, gang, let's have a look. 1355 00:58:27,572 --> 00:58:29,306 * I think I'll take a walk every day now * 1356 00:58:29,339 --> 00:58:32,076 I'm on TV. 1357 00:58:32,109 --> 00:58:34,111 * The summer sun's shown me the way * 1358 00:58:34,144 --> 00:58:35,279 * To be happy now * 1359 00:58:35,312 --> 00:58:38,583 * I just can't stay inside all day * 1360 00:58:38,616 --> 00:58:42,887 * I gotta get out, get me some of those rays...* 1361 00:58:42,920 --> 00:58:44,088 GIRL: Oh, my God... 1362 00:58:44,121 --> 00:58:45,656 Tori Spelling is here 1363 00:58:45,690 --> 00:58:47,592 autographing her new perfume! 1364 00:58:47,625 --> 00:58:49,560 ( girls screaming ) 1365 00:58:58,335 --> 00:59:01,872 * I think I'll go for a walk outside now * 1366 00:59:01,906 --> 00:59:04,575 * The summer sun's calling my name * 1367 00:59:04,609 --> 00:59:05,876 * I hear ya now * 1368 00:59:05,910 --> 00:59:09,146 * I gotta get out, get me some of those rays * 1369 00:59:09,179 --> 00:59:11,749 * Everybody's smilin' * 1370 00:59:11,782 --> 00:59:13,584 * Sunshine day * 1371 00:59:13,618 --> 00:59:15,185 * Everybody's laughin'... * 1372 00:59:15,219 --> 00:59:16,654 LARRY: Bill. 1373 00:59:16,687 --> 00:59:18,055 Brady. 1374 00:59:18,088 --> 00:59:19,757 Occupant. 1375 00:59:19,790 --> 00:59:21,091 Bill. 1376 00:59:21,125 --> 00:59:23,293 Brady... 1377 00:59:23,327 --> 00:59:26,563 "Joint consolidated tax bill: Final notice." 1378 00:59:29,834 --> 00:59:31,602 "Dear Mr. Brady... 1379 00:59:31,636 --> 00:59:33,738 "due to your failure to pay... 1380 00:59:33,771 --> 00:59:39,209 house will be auctioned 2:00 p.m. tomorrow..." 1381 00:59:39,243 --> 00:59:42,212 $20,000. 1382 00:59:42,246 --> 00:59:43,781 Dina? 1383 00:59:43,814 --> 00:59:45,916 Dina... 1384 00:59:45,950 --> 00:59:49,620 this is the greatest day of our lives. 1385 00:59:49,654 --> 00:59:51,388 Did the kids run away? 1386 00:59:51,421 --> 00:59:53,624 No. We are rich. 1387 00:59:53,658 --> 00:59:58,362 We are going to be filthy, stinking, disgustingly rich. 1388 00:59:58,395 --> 00:59:59,363 Larry? 1389 00:59:59,396 --> 01:00:00,364 Yeah? 1390 01:00:00,397 --> 01:00:03,400 Get me my ice mask. 1391 01:00:03,433 --> 01:00:05,169 Forget your ice mask. 1392 01:00:05,202 --> 01:00:06,737 We're going to be so rich 1393 01:00:06,771 --> 01:00:08,906 you can hire an Eskimo to sit on your face. 1394 01:00:16,714 --> 01:00:17,748 ( knocking ) 1395 01:00:17,782 --> 01:00:18,916 It's open. 1396 01:00:18,949 --> 01:00:20,785 Of course it is. 1397 01:00:20,818 --> 01:00:21,919 ( chuckles ) 1398 01:00:21,952 --> 01:00:22,953 Morning. 1399 01:00:22,987 --> 01:00:24,121 Morning, Larry. 1400 01:00:24,154 --> 01:00:25,255 If you're here 1401 01:00:25,289 --> 01:00:27,758 about the offer, the answer's still no. 1402 01:00:27,792 --> 01:00:29,760 I haven't changed my mind. 1403 01:00:29,794 --> 01:00:30,861 No need for that. 1404 01:00:30,895 --> 01:00:33,097 I know you won't be selling this house 1405 01:00:33,130 --> 01:00:36,066 because, after the auction tomorrow at 2:00, I'll own it. 1406 01:00:36,100 --> 01:00:38,402 Well, I don't think there'll be any auction. 1407 01:00:40,004 --> 01:00:41,371 What? 1408 01:00:41,405 --> 01:00:43,207 Well, luckily, I just sold one of my designs, 1409 01:00:43,240 --> 01:00:46,276 so it looks like the Bradys are here to stay. 1410 01:00:48,746 --> 01:00:50,948 So, which firm was lucky enough 1411 01:00:50,981 --> 01:00:53,450 to snag one of your designs, Mike? 1412 01:00:53,483 --> 01:00:55,085 LARRY: And, of course 1413 01:00:55,119 --> 01:00:56,153 if you ever need a property 1414 01:00:56,186 --> 01:00:57,287 for one of your health clubs 1415 01:00:57,321 --> 01:00:58,322 I'm your man. 1416 01:00:58,355 --> 01:00:59,724 Oh, thank you. 1417 01:01:00,825 --> 01:01:03,160 Well, well. What have we here? 1418 01:01:03,193 --> 01:01:04,461 This is one of our new gyms 1419 01:01:04,494 --> 01:01:06,096 that we're constructing. 1420 01:01:06,130 --> 01:01:08,799 We are negotiating to buy the design right now. 1421 01:01:08,833 --> 01:01:10,434 Really? Who's your architect? 1422 01:01:10,467 --> 01:01:12,703 A very talented fellow-- 1423 01:01:12,737 --> 01:01:15,139 name of Brady. 1424 01:01:15,172 --> 01:01:17,041 I guess you won't be breaking ground until after he dries out. 1425 01:01:17,074 --> 01:01:18,042 Dries out? 1426 01:01:18,075 --> 01:01:19,109 I really shouldn't say anything. 1427 01:01:19,143 --> 01:01:20,310 Guy's been through a lot lately, 1428 01:01:20,344 --> 01:01:23,213 what with the charges filed against him and everything. 1429 01:01:23,247 --> 01:01:24,414 Charges? 1430 01:01:24,448 --> 01:01:25,950 Criminal negligence. 1431 01:01:25,983 --> 01:01:28,819 A building he designed completely collapsed. 1432 01:01:28,853 --> 01:01:31,956 Old folks home, Christmas day. 1433 01:01:31,989 --> 01:01:35,325 All those cute, little visiting grandchildren... 1434 01:01:35,359 --> 01:01:36,827 some with puppies. 1435 01:01:36,861 --> 01:01:41,098 Let's take a moment to honor their memory, shall we? 1436 01:01:45,535 --> 01:01:47,504 ( square-dance music playing) 1437 01:01:47,537 --> 01:01:49,740 ( all cheering ) 1438 01:01:51,041 --> 01:01:53,778 ( phone rings ) 1439 01:01:53,811 --> 01:01:54,979 I'll get it. 1440 01:01:56,781 --> 01:01:59,016 Brady residence. 1441 01:01:59,049 --> 01:02:00,150 You did? I see. 1442 01:02:00,184 --> 01:02:01,251 When? 1443 01:02:01,285 --> 01:02:02,887 Uh-huh. 1444 01:02:02,920 --> 01:02:04,088 They did? 1445 01:02:04,521 --> 01:02:05,923 Why not? 1446 01:02:06,891 --> 01:02:09,426 Uh-huh... oh. 1447 01:02:09,459 --> 01:02:11,862 Yeah? 1448 01:02:11,896 --> 01:02:12,429 Right. 1449 01:02:12,462 --> 01:02:14,765 Well... 1450 01:02:14,799 --> 01:02:17,067 bye. 1451 01:02:17,101 --> 01:02:18,268 Bad news, I'm afraid. 1452 01:02:18,302 --> 01:02:20,004 Oh, Mike. What? 1453 01:02:20,037 --> 01:02:22,272 The Flex factory pulled out of the project this morning. 1454 01:02:22,306 --> 01:02:24,208 They're not going with my design. 1455 01:02:24,241 --> 01:02:26,877 Oh, Mike. Why? 1456 01:02:26,911 --> 01:02:28,245 Well, they wouldn't say. 1457 01:02:28,278 --> 01:02:30,280 I guess this means it's over. 1458 01:02:30,314 --> 01:02:33,083 Unless a miracle happens by 2:00 tomorrow, 1459 01:02:33,117 --> 01:02:35,786 the county is going to auction our house. 1460 01:02:35,820 --> 01:02:37,221 Oh, Mike. How? 1461 01:02:38,588 --> 01:02:40,424 Kids, I'm afraid the money 1462 01:02:40,457 --> 01:02:43,794 that we were counting on is no longer a possibility. 1463 01:02:43,828 --> 01:02:45,529 But I want you to remember 1464 01:02:45,562 --> 01:02:47,464 that no matter where we go, 1465 01:02:47,497 --> 01:02:49,399 or whatever house we're in, 1466 01:02:49,433 --> 01:02:52,369 we'll be fine as long as we're together, 1467 01:02:52,402 --> 01:02:55,272 so I don't want to see any more frowns. 1468 01:02:55,305 --> 01:02:56,941 We're Bradys. 1469 01:02:56,974 --> 01:02:58,843 And as a wise man once said: 1470 01:02:58,876 --> 01:03:01,345 "Wherever you go, there you are." 1471 01:03:02,512 --> 01:03:04,949 I never thought of it that way, Dad. 1472 01:03:04,982 --> 01:03:07,284 MARCIA: Thanks, Dad. 1473 01:03:16,326 --> 01:03:19,196 Boy, this is crummy. 1474 01:03:19,229 --> 01:03:22,266 Well, there must be some way out of this mess. 1475 01:03:22,299 --> 01:03:23,868 Everybody think. 1476 01:03:31,308 --> 01:03:32,943 Hey, I've got it. 1477 01:03:32,977 --> 01:03:36,113 We can enter that "Search for the Stars" contest. 1478 01:03:36,146 --> 01:03:37,114 First prize 1479 01:03:37,147 --> 01:03:39,116 is exactly $20,000. 1480 01:03:39,149 --> 01:03:40,317 Hey, that's a nifty idea, Marcia. 1481 01:03:41,418 --> 01:03:42,419 Great idea, Marcia. 1482 01:03:42,452 --> 01:03:43,487 Good idea, Marcia. 1483 01:03:43,520 --> 01:03:44,554 Am I invisible? 1484 01:03:44,588 --> 01:03:46,490 Do I not have a voice? 1485 01:03:46,523 --> 01:03:48,325 I had that idea two days ago. 1486 01:03:48,358 --> 01:03:50,094 Stop being so selfish, Jan. 1487 01:03:50,127 --> 01:03:51,028 Come on, Jan. 1488 01:03:51,061 --> 01:03:52,362 Oh, Jan. 1489 01:03:52,396 --> 01:03:53,363 Jan. Jan. 1490 01:03:53,397 --> 01:03:55,199 Come on, you guys, we got 1491 01:03:55,232 --> 01:03:56,400 a big day ahead of us. 1492 01:03:56,433 --> 01:03:58,535 We better get some rest if we're going to be 1493 01:03:58,568 --> 01:04:00,871 a fresh, young musical group. 1494 01:04:00,905 --> 01:04:02,439 It was my idea. Mine. 1495 01:04:02,472 --> 01:04:04,308 Didn't anybody hear me? 1496 01:04:04,341 --> 01:04:06,410 GIRL: I heard you. 1497 01:04:06,443 --> 01:04:07,611 GIRL 2: Me, too, 1498 01:04:07,644 --> 01:04:10,580 but it sounded better coming from Marcia. 1499 01:04:10,614 --> 01:04:14,218 ( chuckles ) 1500 01:04:19,456 --> 01:04:22,159 Sam, that was the juiciest Meat Cutters' Ball 1501 01:04:22,192 --> 01:04:23,227 I've ever been to. 1502 01:04:23,260 --> 01:04:24,461 I'm cooked. 1503 01:04:24,494 --> 01:04:27,231 Alice, I want you to stick out your hand 1504 01:04:27,264 --> 01:04:28,365 and close your eyes. 1505 01:04:28,398 --> 01:04:30,167 I got a surprise for you. 1506 01:04:30,200 --> 01:04:33,603 Unless it fits on my finger, I've got to hit the sack. 1507 01:04:33,637 --> 01:04:35,139 It better fit, 1508 01:04:35,172 --> 01:04:38,308 or I'm going to have to take it back. 1509 01:04:38,342 --> 01:04:40,077 Sam, I thought this day 1510 01:04:40,110 --> 01:04:41,345 would never come. 1511 01:04:44,648 --> 01:04:46,150 When I saw it, 1512 01:04:46,183 --> 01:04:48,986 I thought it was right up your alley. 1513 01:04:49,019 --> 01:04:50,687 I'm bowled over. 1514 01:04:50,720 --> 01:04:53,390 ( chuckles ) 1515 01:04:56,360 --> 01:04:58,195 I always thought our grandchildren 1516 01:04:58,228 --> 01:05:00,064 would come visit us in this house. 1517 01:05:00,097 --> 01:05:03,233 Oh, Mike. 1518 01:05:03,267 --> 01:05:06,036 You know, this is going to be 1519 01:05:06,070 --> 01:05:09,073 our last night in this bedroom. 1520 01:05:12,042 --> 01:05:14,411 Why, Grandpa Brady. 1521 01:05:23,287 --> 01:05:25,289 ( Carol chuckling softly ) 1522 01:05:41,438 --> 01:05:42,439 Jan, 1523 01:05:42,472 --> 01:05:43,607 where are you going? 1524 01:05:43,640 --> 01:05:45,976 Someplace where I can be appreciated. 1525 01:05:46,010 --> 01:05:47,677 Go ahead and snitch if you want. 1526 01:05:47,711 --> 01:05:49,446 Just give me a head start. 1527 01:05:49,479 --> 01:05:50,247 I wouldn't snitch. 1528 01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:52,649 But how will we sing without you? 1529 01:05:52,682 --> 01:05:54,484 Why don't you ask Marcia? 1530 01:05:54,518 --> 01:05:57,654 Maybe she has another brilliant idea. 1531 01:06:03,760 --> 01:06:04,728 ( door shuts ) 1532 01:06:04,761 --> 01:06:07,497 Mom? Dad? 1533 01:06:07,531 --> 01:06:09,699 ( clearing throats ) 1534 01:06:11,435 --> 01:06:13,403 Uh... what is it, Cindy? 1535 01:06:13,437 --> 01:06:15,372 If you know something, 1536 01:06:15,405 --> 01:06:17,507 but you don't want to be a tattle, 1537 01:06:17,541 --> 01:06:20,477 but it's very important that you tell someone... 1538 01:06:20,510 --> 01:06:22,179 Cindy, let's talk about it tomorrow. 1539 01:06:22,212 --> 01:06:23,747 But Jan could be dead by then! 1540 01:06:23,780 --> 01:06:25,182 What?! 1541 01:06:25,215 --> 01:06:27,284 Oops! 1542 01:06:27,317 --> 01:06:29,619 Why would Jan run away like this? 1543 01:06:29,653 --> 01:06:33,457 Maybe we were thinking too much about our problems 1544 01:06:33,490 --> 01:06:35,792 and not enough about the kids. 1545 01:06:35,825 --> 01:06:38,528 Did anyone say anything 1546 01:06:38,562 --> 01:06:40,197 that would make Jan run away? 1547 01:06:40,230 --> 01:06:42,566 Nothing more than what we usually say to her. 1548 01:06:42,599 --> 01:06:43,633 KIDS: Yeah. 1549 01:06:43,667 --> 01:06:46,036 I'll get Alice. 1550 01:06:48,605 --> 01:06:50,507 Oh. 1551 01:06:50,540 --> 01:06:52,309 Hi, folks. 1552 01:06:52,342 --> 01:06:53,477 Sam, 1553 01:06:53,510 --> 01:06:55,479 what are you doing here? 1554 01:06:55,512 --> 01:06:58,782 Oh, I was just, um, delivering some meat. 1555 01:06:58,815 --> 01:07:00,484 Well, it's a good thing you're here. 1556 01:07:00,517 --> 01:07:03,053 Jan ran away, and we need you and Alice 1557 01:07:03,087 --> 01:07:04,388 to help find her. 1558 01:07:04,421 --> 01:07:05,455 We'll circle the block. 1559 01:07:05,489 --> 01:07:06,690 You check the school. 1560 01:07:06,723 --> 01:07:07,791 Come on, gang, let's go. 1561 01:07:07,824 --> 01:07:10,527 Let's go. 1562 01:07:10,560 --> 01:07:13,597 Come on, everybody, hurry up. 1563 01:07:13,630 --> 01:07:14,531 Come on. 1564 01:07:14,564 --> 01:07:16,200 Come on, Cindy. 1565 01:07:16,233 --> 01:07:17,767 I call the way back. 1566 01:07:17,801 --> 01:07:19,603 I got the backseat. 1567 01:07:24,508 --> 01:07:27,477 What happened? Did an animal die on your head? 1568 01:07:27,511 --> 01:07:28,745 ( chuckling ) 1569 01:07:28,778 --> 01:07:29,579 Hey, lose the hat. 1570 01:07:29,613 --> 01:07:31,215 You'll be okay. 1571 01:08:09,253 --> 01:08:11,355 MIKE: Keep your eyes peeled, everybody. 1572 01:08:17,494 --> 01:08:20,230 Breaker, one-nine, breaker, one-nine, 1573 01:08:20,264 --> 01:08:22,132 this is Christmas Carol. 1574 01:08:22,166 --> 01:08:24,701 Honey, no one's answered us in years. 1575 01:08:24,734 --> 01:08:26,236 Oh, Mike, I have to try. 1576 01:08:28,572 --> 01:08:32,542 Breaker, one-nine, do you read me? 1577 01:08:32,576 --> 01:08:35,779 Anyone out there? 1578 01:08:35,812 --> 01:08:38,382 I need a 20 on a little girl. 1579 01:08:38,415 --> 01:08:42,552 Blond, blue-eyed, answers to the name of Jan. 1580 01:08:42,586 --> 01:08:44,554 Tell her... 1581 01:08:44,588 --> 01:08:49,593 Mother Hen and Father Goose love her very much. 1582 01:08:49,626 --> 01:08:53,430 Come after me if you're out there, over. 1583 01:08:58,335 --> 01:09:01,271 Huh. Sounds like some family 1584 01:09:01,305 --> 01:09:03,573 misses somebody they love very much. 1585 01:09:03,607 --> 01:09:05,375 I don't have a family. 1586 01:09:05,409 --> 01:09:07,577 Oh, no family. 1587 01:09:07,611 --> 01:09:08,612 You know, sometimes 1588 01:09:08,645 --> 01:09:10,747 I'm driving the graveyard shift 1589 01:09:10,780 --> 01:09:12,249 in the middle of nowhere, 1590 01:09:12,282 --> 01:09:14,718 I can't help thinking what might have been 1591 01:09:14,751 --> 01:09:16,753 if I'd taken a different road-- 1592 01:09:16,786 --> 01:09:18,588 married young, had a family-- 1593 01:09:18,622 --> 01:09:19,889 three boys, three girls. 1594 01:09:19,923 --> 01:09:22,659 Oh, then a little voice says, "Are you kidding? 1595 01:09:22,692 --> 01:09:24,928 They'd probably just treat you like a maid." 1596 01:09:24,961 --> 01:09:26,630 Do you want some of this, Jan? 1597 01:09:26,663 --> 01:09:28,232 No, thanks. 1598 01:09:28,265 --> 01:09:29,866 You have a little voice, too? 1599 01:09:29,899 --> 01:09:33,637 Mmm. Oh, honey, when you're on the road as long as I am, 1600 01:09:33,670 --> 01:09:35,605 you got to talk to somebody. 1601 01:09:35,639 --> 01:09:38,708 That's a trick I learned growing up. 1602 01:09:38,742 --> 01:09:40,944 It's tough being a middle child. 1603 01:09:40,977 --> 01:09:43,680 You're a middle child. 1604 01:09:43,713 --> 01:09:44,848 So am I. 1605 01:09:44,881 --> 01:09:46,883 Then you know what it feels like 1606 01:09:46,916 --> 01:09:48,452 not being special. 1607 01:09:48,485 --> 01:09:51,321 What does she mean, "I'm not special?" 1608 01:09:51,355 --> 01:09:53,423 Hey, she's just trying to help. 1609 01:09:53,457 --> 01:09:54,458 My family's not much. 1610 01:09:54,491 --> 01:09:56,793 No kids, though we do have a lot of livestock. 1611 01:09:56,826 --> 01:09:59,863 ( hoarse rasp ): Jan! Oh, Jan! 1612 01:09:59,896 --> 01:10:02,232 Don't listen to her! 1613 01:10:02,266 --> 01:10:03,667 In this day and age, if you're lucky enough... 1614 01:10:03,700 --> 01:10:04,934 Who is that? 1615 01:10:04,968 --> 01:10:08,272 ( hoarse rasp ): It's me-- the new Jan Brady. 1616 01:10:08,305 --> 01:10:10,374 Let's knock over a 7-Eleven. 1617 01:10:10,407 --> 01:10:11,808 Stop! You're scaring me! 1618 01:10:11,841 --> 01:10:13,243 Me, too. Me, too! 1619 01:10:22,286 --> 01:10:24,354 Mom? Dad? 1620 01:10:25,422 --> 01:10:27,924 Hi. I'm back. 1621 01:10:27,957 --> 01:10:29,726 Marcia? Cindy? 1622 01:10:29,759 --> 01:10:31,895 Are you up there? 1623 01:10:33,663 --> 01:10:36,333 Greg? Peter? Bobby? 1624 01:10:37,834 --> 01:10:39,703 Alice? 1625 01:10:42,439 --> 01:10:44,374 Sam? 1626 01:10:44,408 --> 01:10:46,443 ( radio static ) 1627 01:10:46,476 --> 01:10:50,013 Christmas Carol, this is Schultzy, come back to me. 1628 01:10:50,046 --> 01:10:54,518 Schultzy! Th-this is Christmas Carol. 1629 01:10:54,551 --> 01:10:56,720 I got a 20 on a little girl. 1630 01:10:56,753 --> 01:11:01,057 Blue eyes, blonde hair, answers to the name of Jan. 1631 01:11:01,090 --> 01:11:03,293 ( all exclaiming ) 1632 01:11:03,327 --> 01:11:07,030 I just dropped her off at 4222 Clinton Way. 1633 01:11:07,063 --> 01:11:09,299 Thank you, Schultzy, thank you 1634 01:11:09,333 --> 01:11:10,400 and God bless! 1635 01:11:10,434 --> 01:11:12,436 Over. 1636 01:11:12,469 --> 01:11:14,504 That's a big ten-four. 1637 01:11:14,538 --> 01:11:15,705 ( air horn blowing ) 1638 01:11:15,739 --> 01:11:17,807 ( chuckling ) 1639 01:11:19,776 --> 01:11:21,745 Jan? 1640 01:11:21,778 --> 01:11:22,812 Jan, are you here? 1641 01:11:22,846 --> 01:11:24,781 Mom? Dad? 1642 01:11:24,814 --> 01:11:26,883 Oh, honey! 1643 01:11:26,916 --> 01:11:27,884 Oh, honey! 1644 01:11:27,917 --> 01:11:28,785 Oh, sweetheart. 1645 01:11:28,818 --> 01:11:30,587 I'm so glad you're safe! 1646 01:11:30,620 --> 01:11:31,688 Oh, honey, 1647 01:11:31,721 --> 01:11:33,957 what on earth made you run away? 1648 01:11:33,990 --> 01:11:36,960 I thought no one wanted me here anymore, 1649 01:11:36,993 --> 01:11:39,763 but when I was out in the real world, 1650 01:11:39,796 --> 01:11:42,799 I realized that I wanted me to be here. 1651 01:11:42,832 --> 01:11:44,834 You're all a part of me 1652 01:11:44,868 --> 01:11:46,736 and I'm a part of you, 1653 01:11:46,770 --> 01:11:48,838 and there's no escaping that... 1654 01:11:48,872 --> 01:11:51,641 but it makes me feel really special. 1655 01:11:51,675 --> 01:11:53,042 I couldn't have put it 1656 01:11:53,076 --> 01:11:55,445 better myself, Jan, but I'll try anyway. 1657 01:11:55,479 --> 01:11:56,413 See, I've always believed 1658 01:11:56,446 --> 01:11:58,915 that it doesn't matter where your home is, 1659 01:11:58,948 --> 01:12:00,884 because home is where your heart is, 1660 01:12:00,917 --> 01:12:01,985 and we may lose this house, 1661 01:12:02,018 --> 01:12:03,820 but we'll always have our family 1662 01:12:03,853 --> 01:12:05,489 because we're Bradys, 1663 01:12:05,522 --> 01:12:07,424 and this family is our home. 1664 01:12:07,457 --> 01:12:09,926 That's why we'll always have our home. 1665 01:12:09,959 --> 01:12:11,628 As long as we have our family, 1666 01:12:11,661 --> 01:12:14,130 even if we lose our house, we're still Bradys. 1667 01:12:14,163 --> 01:12:16,566 Your father's right. 1668 01:12:16,600 --> 01:12:18,602 ( all talking at once ) Oh, yeah, absolutely, Dad. 1669 01:12:18,635 --> 01:12:19,769 MARCIA: Maybe we can still 1670 01:12:19,803 --> 01:12:20,770 save the house. 1671 01:12:20,804 --> 01:12:21,671 How about Jan's idea 1672 01:12:21,705 --> 01:12:24,574 of the "Search for the Stars" contest? 1673 01:12:24,608 --> 01:12:26,476 Jan's idea? 1674 01:12:26,510 --> 01:12:27,811 Yes, it was Jan's, 1675 01:12:27,844 --> 01:12:29,813 and it's a really great plan. 1676 01:12:29,846 --> 01:12:31,948 CAROL: What's "Search for the Stars?" 1677 01:12:31,981 --> 01:12:32,949 It's a contest 1678 01:12:32,982 --> 01:12:34,951 for the best musical group, 1679 01:12:34,984 --> 01:12:37,821 and there's a first prize of $20,000. 1680 01:12:37,854 --> 01:12:40,457 And singing one of Greg's songs, 1681 01:12:40,490 --> 01:12:41,925 we're sure to win. 1682 01:12:41,958 --> 01:12:44,661 Well, then, you're going to have to sing it without me. 1683 01:12:44,694 --> 01:12:46,930 Huh? What? Why? 1684 01:12:46,963 --> 01:12:50,634 I thought I could change my name and my personality 1685 01:12:50,667 --> 01:12:53,102 and become some big, flashy rock star, 1686 01:12:53,136 --> 01:12:55,505 but I was just kidding myself. 1687 01:12:55,539 --> 01:12:56,806 Nobody liked my act. 1688 01:12:56,840 --> 01:12:59,876 I guess I just don't have what it takes. 1689 01:13:02,746 --> 01:13:04,080 Well, let's face it, 1690 01:13:04,113 --> 01:13:06,750 Johnny Bravo's nothing but... 1691 01:13:06,783 --> 01:13:07,817 Johnny Rotten. 1692 01:13:07,851 --> 01:13:09,619 You're right, son. 1693 01:13:09,653 --> 01:13:12,556 Johnny Bravo doesn't have what it takes... 1694 01:13:12,589 --> 01:13:13,823 but Greg Brady does. 1695 01:13:13,857 --> 01:13:15,559 He has us, 1696 01:13:15,592 --> 01:13:17,761 and this family can accomplish anything. 1697 01:13:17,794 --> 01:13:20,897 Alone, we can only move buckets, but if we work together, 1698 01:13:20,930 --> 01:13:21,831 we can drain rivers. 1699 01:13:21,865 --> 01:13:22,932 Your father's right. 1700 01:13:22,966 --> 01:13:25,001 The eight of us separate 1701 01:13:25,034 --> 01:13:26,169 are just eight... 1702 01:13:26,202 --> 01:13:28,672 well, with Alice, we're nine, but nine... 1703 01:13:28,705 --> 01:13:29,906 Yes, well, technically... 1704 01:13:29,939 --> 01:13:30,974 And with Sam, ten, 1705 01:13:31,007 --> 01:13:33,943 but ten separate, just ten. 1706 01:13:33,977 --> 01:13:35,545 Together... 1707 01:13:35,579 --> 01:13:36,913 we're a Bunch. 1708 01:13:36,946 --> 01:13:38,848 KIDS: Yeah. The Brady Bunch. 1709 01:13:38,882 --> 01:13:40,450 What do you say, Greg? 1710 01:13:40,484 --> 01:13:41,685 Please? 1711 01:13:46,122 --> 01:13:47,991 Well, what are we waiting for? 1712 01:13:48,024 --> 01:13:49,192 Grab some costumes. 1713 01:13:49,225 --> 01:13:51,194 We've got to make that contest! 1714 01:13:51,227 --> 01:13:53,830 Okay! All right! 1715 01:14:00,570 --> 01:14:01,838 * We are blood 1716 01:14:01,871 --> 01:14:03,507 * We don't vote 1717 01:14:03,540 --> 01:14:05,975 * We are standing all alone 1718 01:14:06,009 --> 01:14:07,744 * At the beginning 1719 01:14:07,777 --> 01:14:09,178 * Of the end 1720 01:14:09,212 --> 01:14:11,014 * We are phlegm 1721 01:14:11,047 --> 01:14:14,551 * We are phlegm. 1722 01:14:14,584 --> 01:14:15,919 I'm so nervous. 1723 01:14:15,952 --> 01:14:17,153 Why am I so nervous? 1724 01:14:17,186 --> 01:14:19,889 Stop it. You're making me nervous. 1725 01:14:22,025 --> 01:14:22,992 ( spitoon clanks ) 1726 01:14:23,026 --> 01:14:25,929 All right, let's have a big hand for Phlegm. 1727 01:14:28,732 --> 01:14:31,034 Yay! 1728 01:14:32,769 --> 01:14:34,504 You sounded hot. 1729 01:14:34,538 --> 01:14:37,040 What, are you-- completely brain-dead? 1730 01:14:37,073 --> 01:14:38,942 Leon missed an entire riff. 1731 01:14:38,975 --> 01:14:40,510 Didn't you hear it? 1732 01:14:40,544 --> 01:14:42,145 I liked it. 1733 01:14:42,178 --> 01:14:45,048 You're such a loser. 1734 01:14:49,285 --> 01:14:50,954 Hey, Eric. 1735 01:14:50,987 --> 01:14:52,288 I'm sick and tired 1736 01:14:52,321 --> 01:14:54,658 of seeing you treat Holly that way. 1737 01:14:54,691 --> 01:14:55,959 In fact... 1738 01:14:55,992 --> 01:14:57,961 I'm sick and tired of you altogether. 1739 01:14:59,162 --> 01:15:01,565 You're nothing but a... 1740 01:15:01,598 --> 01:15:03,099 a big bully. 1741 01:15:03,132 --> 01:15:05,802 ( chuckling ) 1742 01:15:05,835 --> 01:15:07,537 You're dog meat, Brady. 1743 01:15:07,571 --> 01:15:11,741 ( voice breaking ): Do it... and die, Eric. 1744 01:15:16,846 --> 01:15:18,047 ( falsetto ): Ohh! 1745 01:15:18,081 --> 01:15:18,948 Ohh! 1746 01:15:18,982 --> 01:15:20,183 Oh. 1747 01:15:22,118 --> 01:15:24,053 JAN: Hurry, Peter. 1748 01:15:24,087 --> 01:15:25,188 We're on. 1749 01:15:25,221 --> 01:15:27,557 Thanks, Peter. 1750 01:15:27,591 --> 01:15:30,126 I think you're really... neato. 1751 01:15:32,762 --> 01:15:35,131 M.C.: Oh, yes. I hope everybody's having 1752 01:15:35,164 --> 01:15:36,265 a good time. 1753 01:15:36,299 --> 01:15:40,336 ( deep voice: ) Why, uh... thank you, Holly. 1754 01:15:40,369 --> 01:15:44,708 I think you're... Ginger and Mary Ann combined. 1755 01:15:46,209 --> 01:15:47,744 Come on, Peter. That's us. 1756 01:15:47,777 --> 01:15:48,678 See ya. 1757 01:15:48,712 --> 01:15:49,913 Good luck. 1758 01:15:49,946 --> 01:15:52,548 ( Eric moaning ) 1759 01:15:54,183 --> 01:15:56,185 ( guitar solo playing ) 1760 01:15:59,288 --> 01:16:03,192 * Flying down the highway in our makeshift Model T.A. * 1761 01:16:03,226 --> 01:16:03,960 * Ooh 1762 01:16:03,993 --> 01:16:04,961 * Yeah 1763 01:16:04,994 --> 01:16:06,062 * Ooh 1764 01:16:06,095 --> 01:16:07,731 * It's a beautiful morning 1765 01:16:07,764 --> 01:16:12,268 * And it's gonna be a beautiful day * 1766 01:16:12,301 --> 01:16:15,271 * The wheels are humming and the guitar's strumming * 1767 01:16:15,304 --> 01:16:18,241 * And the radio is blasting and good times are coming * 1768 01:16:18,274 --> 01:16:20,109 * As we're flying down the highway * 1769 01:16:20,143 --> 01:16:22,145 * In our makeshift Model T.A. 1770 01:16:24,247 --> 01:16:27,150 * We're gonna keep on, keep on, keep on * 1771 01:16:27,183 --> 01:16:30,887 * Keep on dancing all through the night * 1772 01:16:30,920 --> 01:16:36,626 * We're gonna keep on, keep on, keep on doing it right * 1773 01:16:36,660 --> 01:16:39,796 * We're gonna keep on, keep on, keep on moving * 1774 01:16:39,829 --> 01:16:43,266 * Gonna keep on, keep on, keep on grooving * 1775 01:16:43,299 --> 01:16:47,270 * Keep on singing and dancing all through the night * 1776 01:16:48,838 --> 01:16:51,307 ( singing as Elvis ): * You can hear the music 1777 01:16:51,340 --> 01:16:53,076 * More than 26 miles away 1778 01:16:53,109 --> 01:16:54,678 * Ooh, yeah 1779 01:16:54,711 --> 01:16:55,679 * Ooh 1780 01:16:55,712 --> 01:16:57,146 * Your smile is heaven 1781 01:16:57,180 --> 01:17:00,083 * And heaven is here to stay 1782 01:17:00,116 --> 01:17:01,284 * Yeah 1783 01:17:01,317 --> 01:17:03,252 * We're gonna keep on, keep on 1784 01:17:03,286 --> 01:17:07,824 * Keep on, keep on dancing all through the night * 1785 01:17:07,857 --> 01:17:14,030 * We're gonna keep on, keep on, keep on doing it right * 1786 01:17:14,063 --> 01:17:16,833 * We're gonna keep on, keep on, keep on moving * 1787 01:17:16,866 --> 01:17:20,203 * Gonna keep on, keep on, keep on grooving * 1788 01:17:20,236 --> 01:17:21,871 * Keep on singing 1789 01:17:21,905 --> 01:17:25,141 * And dancing all through the night * 1790 01:17:31,915 --> 01:17:34,283 * We're gonna keep on, keep on 1791 01:17:34,317 --> 01:17:38,321 * Keep on, keep on dancing all through the night * 1792 01:17:38,354 --> 01:17:44,060 * We're gonna keep on, keep on, keep on doing it right * 1793 01:17:44,093 --> 01:17:48,431 * We're gonna keep on, keep on, keep on moving * 1794 01:17:48,464 --> 01:17:51,200 * Gonna keep on, keep on... 1795 01:17:51,234 --> 01:17:53,202 ( both squealing ) 1796 01:17:58,241 --> 01:17:59,976 Thank you, Brady Bunch. 1797 01:18:01,277 --> 01:18:02,712 You were great. 1798 01:18:02,746 --> 01:18:04,748 Great. 1799 01:18:04,781 --> 01:18:07,050 Give the rest of our contestants a big hand 1800 01:18:07,083 --> 01:18:08,151 as our judges 1801 01:18:08,184 --> 01:18:10,153 tally up the scores. 1802 01:18:13,857 --> 01:18:15,158 Thank you. 1803 01:18:16,225 --> 01:18:17,827 And I have it right here. 1804 01:18:17,861 --> 01:18:19,428 The winner of the Search 1805 01:18:19,462 --> 01:18:22,198 for the Stars $20,000 grand prize is... 1806 01:18:23,366 --> 01:18:25,835 the Brady Bunch? 1807 01:18:25,869 --> 01:18:28,037 ( cheering ) 1808 01:18:28,071 --> 01:18:31,841 ( scattered applause ) 1809 01:18:31,875 --> 01:18:33,442 Hey, great job. Thanks. 1810 01:18:35,544 --> 01:18:38,081 They what?! 1811 01:18:38,114 --> 01:18:40,416 How could those losers win anything? 1812 01:18:40,449 --> 01:18:42,752 Look, Eric, you got to stall them for me. 1813 01:18:42,786 --> 01:18:44,921 What do you mean, what's in it for you? 1814 01:18:44,954 --> 01:18:46,756 All right, you have my permission 1815 01:18:46,790 --> 01:18:48,424 to pierce anything you want. 1816 01:18:48,457 --> 01:18:50,426 Just keep them from getting here. 1817 01:18:50,459 --> 01:18:51,861 Damn kid. 1818 01:19:01,137 --> 01:19:02,405 Come on. 1819 01:19:05,374 --> 01:19:06,409 Well, here it is. 1820 01:19:06,442 --> 01:19:08,444 A check made out to the Brady Bunch 1821 01:19:08,477 --> 01:19:11,180 for $20,000. 1822 01:19:11,214 --> 01:19:12,248 Come on, gang, let's go. Hurry! 1823 01:19:12,281 --> 01:19:13,282 All right, everybody. 1824 01:19:13,316 --> 01:19:14,283 Let's hear it for them Bradys. 1825 01:19:14,317 --> 01:19:15,284 They were something else. 1826 01:19:15,318 --> 01:19:16,485 Thanks for coming down. 1827 01:19:16,519 --> 01:19:18,321 I hope you had a good time and we'll see you... 1828 01:19:19,322 --> 01:19:20,289 Come on, come on. 1829 01:19:20,323 --> 01:19:21,124 Let's go, troops! 1830 01:19:21,157 --> 01:19:22,391 Come on! Hurry up! 1831 01:19:24,393 --> 01:19:25,795 ( girls clamoring ) 1832 01:19:25,829 --> 01:19:27,463 Hey, there, groovy chicks. 1833 01:19:27,496 --> 01:19:30,466 You're all happening in far out ways. 1834 01:19:30,499 --> 01:19:32,135 Greg, hurry. The house. 1835 01:19:40,343 --> 01:19:42,846 Now, how do you suppose that happened? 1836 01:19:42,879 --> 01:19:45,314 Oh, Mike. What are we going to do? 1837 01:19:45,348 --> 01:19:46,249 ( car alarm blaring ) 1838 01:19:46,282 --> 01:19:48,885 Hey, Marcia, look. It's our friend, Eddie. 1839 01:19:48,918 --> 01:19:50,153 You remember. 1840 01:19:50,186 --> 01:19:51,587 The guy who needed a car jack. 1841 01:19:51,620 --> 01:19:53,857 Come on, everybody. He can give us a lift. 1842 01:19:59,362 --> 01:20:00,496 GREG: Hey, Eddie! 1843 01:20:00,529 --> 01:20:02,365 Oh, no. 1844 01:20:02,398 --> 01:20:04,333 Can you give us a ride? 1845 01:20:04,367 --> 01:20:05,601 A ride? 1846 01:20:05,634 --> 01:20:08,204 Good afternoon. 1847 01:20:08,237 --> 01:20:09,205 Having trouble 1848 01:20:09,238 --> 01:20:10,606 with the car alarm? 1849 01:20:10,639 --> 01:20:11,908 No. It's not our car. 1850 01:20:11,941 --> 01:20:13,309 It's our friend Eddie's. 1851 01:20:13,342 --> 01:20:15,511 Oh, really? 1852 01:20:15,544 --> 01:20:17,246 Where are the keys, Eddie? 1853 01:20:17,280 --> 01:20:18,481 I lost them. 1854 01:20:18,514 --> 01:20:20,149 Oh, no. 1855 01:20:20,183 --> 01:20:22,618 But we were counting on you to give us a ride to our house. 1856 01:20:22,651 --> 01:20:24,087 I'll run the plate. 1857 01:20:24,120 --> 01:20:25,388 BOBBY: Uh, excuse me, Officer 1858 01:20:25,421 --> 01:20:28,324 but I'd hate to ask a law enforcement official 1859 01:20:28,357 --> 01:20:30,193 to bend the rules... 1860 01:20:30,226 --> 01:20:32,228 especially for penal code 117 1861 01:20:32,261 --> 01:20:34,097 section 33-B, 1862 01:20:34,130 --> 01:20:35,298 but our house is at stake. 1863 01:20:35,331 --> 01:20:38,134 ( clamoring ) 1864 01:20:39,969 --> 01:20:42,305 Please? 1865 01:20:44,407 --> 01:20:46,175 2:00. Auction time. 1866 01:20:46,209 --> 01:20:48,311 It's exciting, isn't it, Alice? 1867 01:20:49,913 --> 01:20:51,580 By the power authorized me 1868 01:20:51,614 --> 01:20:53,182 by the county of Los Angeles, 1869 01:20:53,216 --> 01:20:56,185 I hereby offer this property to the highest bidder, 1870 01:20:56,219 --> 01:20:57,420 unless the owner redeems... 1871 01:20:57,453 --> 01:20:58,988 Come on, come on, come on. 1872 01:20:59,022 --> 01:21:00,089 Okay, I'll start 1873 01:21:00,123 --> 01:21:03,526 the bidding at the sum total of back taxes: $20,000. 1874 01:21:03,559 --> 01:21:05,194 Do I have any takers? 1875 01:21:05,228 --> 01:21:08,397 Say... I've got $20,000. 1876 01:21:08,431 --> 01:21:09,933 ( sirens blaring ) 1877 01:21:09,966 --> 01:21:11,134 MIKE: Stop the auction! 1878 01:21:13,402 --> 01:21:15,571 We have the money for the tax bill. 1879 01:21:17,240 --> 01:21:19,108 I repeat, 1880 01:21:19,142 --> 01:21:20,643 stop the auction. 1881 01:21:20,676 --> 01:21:22,912 We have the money for the tax bill. 1882 01:21:22,946 --> 01:21:25,214 The house is still ours. 1883 01:21:25,248 --> 01:21:26,515 Come on, kids. 1884 01:21:30,453 --> 01:21:32,055 Hold everything. 1885 01:21:34,290 --> 01:21:35,925 Good news, everybody. 1886 01:21:35,959 --> 01:21:38,962 The Bradys are here to stay. 1887 01:21:38,995 --> 01:21:40,263 You lied to us, Dittmeyer. 1888 01:21:40,296 --> 01:21:41,497 The Bradys aren't selling. 1889 01:21:41,530 --> 01:21:42,498 I knew it! 1890 01:21:42,531 --> 01:21:43,499 You guaranteed us! 1891 01:21:43,532 --> 01:21:45,101 You ruined us, Dittmeyer. 1892 01:21:45,134 --> 01:21:46,135 You're going to pay for this. 1893 01:21:46,169 --> 01:21:47,503 MIKE: Now, hold on, people. 1894 01:21:47,536 --> 01:21:48,938 Wait a minute. 1895 01:21:50,239 --> 01:21:52,075 The man you should be angry with 1896 01:21:52,108 --> 01:21:55,378 is me, 'cause our house is more important than money. 1897 01:21:55,411 --> 01:21:57,981 This neighborhood is more important than money. 1898 01:21:58,014 --> 01:21:59,182 Tell me, how many times 1899 01:21:59,215 --> 01:22:01,117 have we borrowed each other's power tools 1900 01:22:01,150 --> 01:22:02,952 or patched up each other's kids? 1901 01:22:02,986 --> 01:22:05,254 We know so much about each other. 1902 01:22:05,288 --> 01:22:08,091 I know that every January, Mr. Yeager's going to have 1903 01:22:08,124 --> 01:22:10,226 that big Super Bowl party at his house. 1904 01:22:10,259 --> 01:22:11,260 Yeah. 1905 01:22:11,294 --> 01:22:13,296 We know every spring Mrs. Simmons 1906 01:22:13,329 --> 01:22:15,598 is going to have the prettiest daffodils on the block. 1907 01:22:15,631 --> 01:22:17,600 They are beautiful. They are lovely flowers. 1908 01:22:17,633 --> 01:22:20,036 We know that at 10:15 every Saturday morning, 1909 01:22:20,069 --> 01:22:21,404 Mrs. Topping likes to walk 1910 01:22:21,437 --> 01:22:23,239 through her living room naked. 1911 01:22:23,272 --> 01:22:24,273 ( laughing ) 1912 01:22:24,307 --> 01:22:25,508 You knew about that? 1913 01:22:25,541 --> 01:22:27,043 Call me old-fashioned, 1914 01:22:27,076 --> 01:22:29,045 but these things are important 1915 01:22:29,078 --> 01:22:30,980 and they're not for sale. 1916 01:22:31,014 --> 01:22:33,149 This is our neighborhood... 1917 01:22:33,182 --> 01:22:34,450 and we're staying. 1918 01:22:36,019 --> 01:22:38,454 Now, this is going to sound crazy... 1919 01:22:38,487 --> 01:22:40,323 but Brady's right. 1920 01:22:40,356 --> 01:22:41,991 We're never going to find 1921 01:22:42,025 --> 01:22:43,459 another neighborhood like this. 1922 01:22:43,492 --> 01:22:46,395 And we'll never find neighbors like the Bradys. 1923 01:22:48,264 --> 01:22:49,999 We're staying, too. 1924 01:22:50,033 --> 01:22:51,334 Us, too. 1925 01:22:51,367 --> 01:22:52,635 BOTH: So are we. 1926 01:22:52,668 --> 01:22:54,070 We will, too. 1927 01:22:54,103 --> 01:22:56,039 Great. 1928 01:22:56,072 --> 01:22:57,206 Gosh, I wish I lived here. 1929 01:22:58,707 --> 01:23:01,010 I mean, it's... it's incredible. 1930 01:23:01,044 --> 01:23:03,646 You people are all staying... 1931 01:23:03,679 --> 01:23:08,484 because one family is willing to stand up 1932 01:23:08,517 --> 01:23:10,253 for what they believe in? 1933 01:23:10,286 --> 01:23:12,488 Well... that and the huge settlement 1934 01:23:12,521 --> 01:23:16,192 we're going to get after we sue Dittmeyer's ass. 1935 01:23:16,225 --> 01:23:17,493 Oh, Mike. 1936 01:23:17,526 --> 01:23:20,029 I always knew you could hit a grand slam 1937 01:23:20,063 --> 01:23:22,498 and now we can stay in our house after all. 1938 01:23:22,531 --> 01:23:25,668 Hey, do you know who'd love to hear about this? 1939 01:23:27,303 --> 01:23:28,504 KIDS: Grandma! 1940 01:23:28,537 --> 01:23:29,572 Hey. 1941 01:23:29,605 --> 01:23:31,507 ( clamoring ) 1942 01:23:32,641 --> 01:23:34,677 Hi, everybody. 1943 01:23:36,412 --> 01:23:40,683 Wait a minute. 1944 01:23:40,716 --> 01:23:43,219 Look, how pretty you have gotten. 1945 01:23:43,252 --> 01:23:45,188 Oh, those clothes. 1946 01:23:45,221 --> 01:23:46,622 Oh, what taste. 1947 01:23:46,655 --> 01:23:48,624 And that smile... 1948 01:23:48,657 --> 01:23:53,529 Oh, Marcia, you are such a beauty. 1949 01:23:53,562 --> 01:23:55,698 Everyone loves Marcia. 1950 01:23:55,731 --> 01:23:56,832 No one loves you. 1951 01:23:56,865 --> 01:24:00,069 ( raspy voice ): Watch my head spin. 1952 01:24:00,103 --> 01:24:02,538 Kill, kill, kill! 1953 01:24:02,571 --> 01:24:04,073 No, stop it! 1954 01:24:04,107 --> 01:24:05,374 I can't take it anymore! 1955 01:24:05,408 --> 01:24:06,542 ( voice laughing ) 1956 01:24:06,575 --> 01:24:08,344 Aw, shut up, you loser! 1957 01:24:08,377 --> 01:24:09,378 Jan! 1958 01:24:09,412 --> 01:24:10,379 Cut the crap. 1959 01:24:10,413 --> 01:24:11,714 ( voice laughing ) 1960 01:24:11,747 --> 01:24:13,416 ( laughing stops ) 1961 01:24:13,449 --> 01:24:14,550 They're gone. 1962 01:24:14,583 --> 01:24:16,319 Thank you, Grandma. 1963 01:24:16,352 --> 01:24:18,387 Oh, there. 1964 01:24:18,421 --> 01:24:20,723 Cindy. 1965 01:24:20,756 --> 01:24:22,558 Oh, Cindy. 1966 01:24:22,591 --> 01:24:25,161 Why does Jan get all the attention? 1967 01:24:25,194 --> 01:24:29,565 Yeah. It's always Jan, Jan, Jan. 1968 01:24:30,833 --> 01:24:32,835 ( electric guitar playing theme song ) 1969 01:25:58,387 --> 01:26:00,823 * The Brady Bunch 1970 01:26:00,856 --> 01:26:02,925 * The Brady Bunch 1971 01:26:02,958 --> 01:26:08,931 * That's the way we became the Brady Bunch. * 1972 01:26:24,780 --> 01:26:28,551 * I remember someone said 1973 01:26:28,584 --> 01:26:32,288 * Even when we lose, we win * 1974 01:26:32,321 --> 01:26:35,924 * Well, we must be winning now * 1975 01:26:35,958 --> 01:26:39,662 * Cause it's got that losing feeling * * Mom always said 1976 01:26:39,695 --> 01:26:43,399 * Don't throw the ball in the house * 1977 01:26:43,432 --> 01:26:46,902 * I only wish that I had known 1978 01:26:46,935 --> 01:26:50,739 * Maybe I would not have broken * 1979 01:26:50,773 --> 01:26:54,477 * Every single thing I own 1980 01:26:54,510 --> 01:26:58,481 * Just wait for fate to change the life that you hate * 1981 01:26:58,514 --> 01:27:01,917 * Down to your DNA 1982 01:27:01,950 --> 01:27:05,788 * Just wait for fate to change the life that you hate * 1983 01:27:05,821 --> 01:27:07,956 * And get out of our way 1984 01:27:07,990 --> 01:27:09,725 * Have a nice day 1985 01:27:16,399 --> 01:27:20,369 * You know your father is right * 1986 01:27:20,403 --> 01:27:23,972 * And he's always going to be 1987 01:27:24,006 --> 01:27:27,810 * Well, that makes me feel so great * 1988 01:27:27,843 --> 01:27:31,547 * Cause I just love being angry * 1989 01:27:31,580 --> 01:27:35,418 * Just wait for fate to change the life that you hate * 1990 01:27:35,451 --> 01:27:37,720 * Down to your DNA 1991 01:27:37,753 --> 01:27:42,791 * Just wait for fate to change the life that you hate * 1992 01:27:42,825 --> 01:27:44,627 * And get out of our way 1993 01:27:44,660 --> 01:27:46,429 * Have a nice day 1994 01:27:46,462 --> 01:27:48,764 ( guitar solo ) 1995 01:27:48,797 --> 01:27:51,867 Captioning sponsored by PARAMOUNT PICTURES 1996 01:27:51,900 --> 01:27:54,737 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 123433