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A Swiss legend tells of three herdsmen who
let themselves in for the powers of evil
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and were punished gruesomely
for their outrage.
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I swear to god...
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to carry out my duties as a herdsman
conscientously and faithfully,
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to be without bias,
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to take good care of
the kettle confided to me
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and to protect it from any harm
with all my means.
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I will distribute the salt
justfully among the kettle.
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I shall see to it that
my fellow herdsmen
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carry out their duties carefully.
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Furthermore, I shall not hunt,
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neither socialise
nor trade with strangers,
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report sacrileges
or misdoings immediately
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and obediently follow
the orders of the alp reeve.
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I will do so with the utmost faith
and without material desires,
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with the help of the Lord
and the dear saints.
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A herdsman protects.
He doesn't kill.
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Next time he hits me,
I'll spit on him!
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Lord, we praise thy name,
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for you do us good!
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We ask of you...
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to listen to the Alp...
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and to guard everything attached to it.
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[inaudible]
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This is the will of god...
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and the dear, holy St. Anton!
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This is the will of god...
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and of the dear, holy St. Wendel!
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This is the will of god...
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This is the will of god
and the dear, holy St. Carlos...
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and of all the other
dear, holy saints...
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and chosen ones belonging to the lord.
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This is god's will...
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under the holy cross!
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Praised be Jesus Christ!
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That's three a day...
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Multiplied by twenty...
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That means there are...
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One, two, three, four, five, six...
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Sixty plus three...
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Now, that's sixty plus three...
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One multiplied by ten...
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No, not ten, twelve!
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One multiplied by twelve...
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One multiplied by twelve...
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Alright, up on the slope...
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there are 140 cows.
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140...
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One, two, three, four, five...
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six, seven, eight.
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Seven days and till noon...
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We'll go back to the black mountain.
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To the black mountain.
For seven days and until noon.
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Nobody's been up there since...
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I won't come!
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Look, boy...
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This helps!
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A whore's stocking and a peasant's axe,
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if that ring's closed,
it's bad for the witch!
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A whore's stocking
and a peasant's axe
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if the ring's closed
it's bad for the witch!
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A whore's stocking
and a peasant's axe
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if the ring's closed
it's bad for the witch!
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Come home unharmed!
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Come home unharmed!
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Come home unharmed!
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Come home unharmed!
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Lord protect us - our dear, holy cross.
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The cross, boy!
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Go!
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You like it?
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Milk onto the grass,
by God's power it'll help.
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Milk onto steel won't
leave the devil a choice.
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Wherever you go,
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praise in the name of god!
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We ask of you to protect the alp...
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and everything attached to it!
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Amen!
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00:23:19,086 --> 00:23:22,722
It's humid, isn't it?
- But no thunderstorm coming.
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Sakrament!
[blasphemical curse]
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No Sakrament!
[Don't curse!]
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Go get some wood, boy!
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Christ!
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Yes, yes...
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Come!
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Pretty baggage!
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Baggage!
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Where have you got it,
so that I can't find it?
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This will make a head.
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Two round boobies
from the acre's bottom,
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a belly,
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a cunt.
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A cunt! An ass!
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I won't allow this here!
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No!
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You dirty pig!
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Biting me, huh?
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I'll grind your dick!
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Lay down and sleep, boy!
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Bruni! Come, Bruni!
Look here! Good girl.
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Yes.
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Good girl.
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You can take it.
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Yes, good girl. Look!
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One day you'll end up
like the herder of Sieglsvat.
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For a hundred years, he's been roaming
the alp, wiping his hand on the grass.
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Because he let one cow lick
more salt than the others.
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That's not fair.
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Open it.
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That's medicine!
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Why don't you drown yourself in it!
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He bit me and now I got an infection!
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Damn!
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C'mon, give me a hand and tie it up!
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Ouch! Damn!
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Skip it!
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Good, isn't it?
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Pretty baggage.
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Want some as well? Here, drink!
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Now we'll make a head!
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Two round boobies
from the acre's bottom!
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A breast, a handful...
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that's one!
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A nice little belly full of jelly!
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A girl of sand from Rhineland!
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One girl of this kind is like two!
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And now, something for the legs!
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A nice little skirt...
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And what should the cunt be made of?
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And a large ass full of joy!
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And a large ass of old wood!
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That lap of hers is enough for three!
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A cunt that can never be filled!
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Hell, yes!
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Hand it over!
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The tits small and nice.
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Yes, nice!
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Two round titties from
the acre's bottom,
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that's what god and
holy St. Anton want!
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A nice little belly full of jelly
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that's what god and the
dear holy St. Wendel want!
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What should the cunt be made of?
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This is the will...
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this is the will of god...
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and of the dear, holy St. Joseph...
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who's coming to consolate
and deliver us by the...
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by the...
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- By the deathbed!
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And the big ass of Altdorf!
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[inaudible]
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Amen!
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Want some too?
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And some schnapps!
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Yeah! Yeah!
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One breast, a handful, that's one!
156
00:44:23,183 --> 00:44:27,443
A woman, one armful of her's like two!
157
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One ass, that lap or hers are three!
158
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A cunt! One that can never be filled...
- Hey hey hey!
159
00:44:35,063 --> 00:44:40,799
Slow down, you stud!
She's still a virgin!
160
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And not yet baptised.
- Let's baptise her then!
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With holy water, huh?
Boy, pass me the schnapps!
162
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I baptise you...
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In the name of the father,
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00:45:12,577 --> 00:45:15,198
And the boy,
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And the schnapps,
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Amen!
167
00:46:56,871 --> 00:46:58,736
Sepp!
168
00:48:24,964 --> 00:48:26,649
Hey, herdsman!
169
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Come, get up!
- What is it?
170
00:48:34,772 --> 00:48:37,504
What is it, what is it!
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You, carry on.
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My hand's aching.
173
00:52:51,568 --> 00:52:53,932
A thunderstorm's coming!
174
00:52:58,205 --> 00:53:00,806
It's coming from the east.
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00:54:01,538 --> 00:54:03,710
What is it?
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Sit down and eat.
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00:54:26,338 --> 00:54:27,955
Eat!
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00:54:33,266 --> 00:54:35,469
Eat!!!
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00:55:02,122 --> 00:55:04,828
They're all soaked!
180
00:56:06,295 --> 00:56:11,599
We ask of you to protect the alp
and everything attached to it!
181
00:56:11,600 --> 00:56:16,200
This is god's will!
- And of the holy St. Anton!
182
00:56:16,240 --> 00:56:19,800
This is god's will!
- And of the holy St. Wendel!
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00:56:19,866 --> 00:56:25,600
This is god's will!
- For all the chosen, holy ones.
184
00:56:25,688 --> 00:56:29,200
This is god's will.
- And our dear, holy cross!
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00:56:29,289 --> 00:56:32,998
They won't help us in this storm!
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00:57:55,418 --> 00:57:58,120
That's good, boy.
187
00:59:05,135 --> 00:59:06,563
Don't look!
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Or it will take us over.
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00:59:52,399 --> 00:59:56,274
I'll get you, cunt of satan!
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00:59:56,275 --> 00:59:58,075
You...
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01:01:26,229 --> 01:01:28,078
Boy!
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01:01:30,573 --> 01:01:32,123
Boy!
193
01:01:35,997 --> 01:01:37,728
Boy!
194
01:01:56,201 --> 01:01:58,160
Boy!
195
01:02:20,974 --> 01:02:22,902
She's taken him!
196
01:02:44,327 --> 01:02:45,806
Don't open!
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01:03:18,955 --> 01:03:21,842
Who is it?
- Me!
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01:03:24,393 --> 01:03:25,895
The boy!
199
01:03:47,214 --> 01:03:48,676
What's the matter?
200
01:04:00,249 --> 01:04:01,923
What happened?
201
01:04:03,831 --> 01:04:05,530
What happened?
202
01:04:12,439 --> 01:04:14,560
Bruni's dead.
203
01:04:16,562 --> 01:04:20,789
She made a false step, fell.
204
01:04:21,390 --> 01:04:24,778
Down the rocks into the river.
205
01:04:28,006 --> 01:04:32,253
Doesn't move.
Won't give no more milk.
206
01:06:52,061 --> 01:06:53,451
Watch out!
207
01:07:49,674 --> 01:07:53,530
The bull shall screw her,
then she'll have enough!
208
01:07:54,767 --> 01:07:55,608
Yes!
209
01:07:57,253 --> 01:07:59,431
You damned witch!
210
01:08:04,992 --> 01:08:07,177
Fetch the rope, boy!
211
01:08:32,383 --> 01:08:34,835
Get the bull!
- Yes!
212
01:09:53,020 --> 01:09:54,568
Give me the rope, boy!
213
01:10:52,703 --> 01:10:54,764
Good.
214
01:12:17,559 --> 01:12:19,557
Now she's done for.
215
01:14:12,150 --> 01:14:13,962
Come now, boy!
216
01:14:17,469 --> 01:14:19,705
Go ahead, cut!
217
01:14:20,022 --> 01:14:21,638
Cut!
218
01:14:41,944 --> 01:14:47,218
Blood doesn't melt like snow,
blood averts forever.
219
01:16:22,968 --> 01:16:24,412
Come boy!
220
01:16:24,513 --> 01:16:27,732
Wake up. We'll leave.
221
01:16:29,733 --> 01:16:31,457
We won't stay here!
222
01:16:39,530 --> 01:16:42,087
Go, boy! Get going!
223
01:16:44,010 --> 01:16:46,833
Roundup the kettle on the lawn!
224
01:20:43,886 --> 01:20:49,052
The very same evening, some men from
my village went up the black mountain,
225
01:20:49,053 --> 01:20:53,339
made a doll just like
the witch and burnt it,
226
01:20:53,340 --> 01:20:56,762
so that the ban would be in force.
227
01:21:40,625 --> 01:21:47,020
Subtitled by AnDeRsSoN
for Cinemageddon - March 2010
14046
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