All language subtitles for Living Single - S02 E19 - Legal Briefs (480p - HULU Web-DL)

Maxine, I question‐‐.

No, ah. I am not covering
your ass again for it.

Are we a team?

Alright, what is it?

People v. Falcon. The defendant
is charged with possession

with intent to sell. He had
no drugs on his person

but he did have powder
all over his shoe.

If one were to mention
plea bargaining

your feeling would
be along the‐‐

‐ No way. ‐ That's
my feeling exactly.

And if I were to refer to
a president, I might‐‐.

People v. Ricky.

‐ Get out of my head.
‐ Get out of my face.

People, people.

Now, I just stopped
down to introduce you

to your new supervisor,
Preston August.

And now, folks, we're
really lucky to have him.

So please, don't give him
any ulcers, migraines

hives or facial ticks.

It's good to see
you again, Maxine.

♪ We are living single ♪

♪ Oh, and in a
90's kinda world ♪

♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪

♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ What ♪

♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ That's right ♪

♪ Whenever this life gets
tough you got a fight with ♪

♪ My home girls standing
to my left and my right ♪

♪ True blue, it's
tight like glue ♪

♪ We are living single ♪

Obie, you put these in my
pile, but they're yours.

Oh, I know that, I was kinda of
hoping you'd wear em' later.

Oh, well. Ignore that red
laced bra in your pile

there's no message there.

Hello, people.

Seeing you wheel around
that trolley reminds me

of my uncle, Levi. 'Course
he was transporting coffins

but the technique
is very similar.

Khadijah, I'm here to pick
up my 150 copies of Flavor.

Well, you're a day early. It
doesn't come out until tomorrow.

Khadijah, women in New York
are holding their breath

awaiting the story
you did on moi.

Well, tell them to exhale.

It's only a picture
and a paragraph.

Yeah, Kyle, you're one of
a bunch of men profile.

Yes, but the others will simply
recede into the background

once the women get a load of me.

It's called the
Barker effect, yeah.

Yes, scientists been working
round the clock to find a cure.

Yeah!

Khadijah, I've begged you not
to put him in your magazine.

But no, you just had to
do it, he already cleared

off a whole wall for
his press clip.

Even took down my diploma
and my graduate polaroid

from the DeVry institute.

I earned that!

You two went shopping together?

No, Max ran into me outside
and is helping with my bags.

How come? That's not food.

Can't I help a friend?

Did you get with one of your
boy toys at lunch, today?

No, I did not.

I did however run
into an old friend.

‐ Ah‐ha. I knew it was a man.
‐ Whoo!

For a minute I thought
she was setting me up

for a practical joke.

So Max, who did you run into?

You remember him.

Preston August.

Is that the guy you spent all
your beads on at Club Med?

No, no. That was Augustedo,
he had only one name.

Preston August the attorney,
I met a couple of years ago

on that ski trip, yes.

Oh, yeah. You'll
really hit it off.

Yes, it was only repeated
and mind numbing sex

that kept me from
falling in love.

‐ So where did you see him?
‐ At my office.

He's my new boss.

‐ Oh, girl. You in danger.
‐ Oh, please.

It's not about that.

But still, you got to work for
somebody you've seen naked.

Now that's distracting.

Yeah, how do you think I feel

every time I see Overton
change a light bulb. Uff.

Well, it's not about that.

It's just nice to be working
with someone that I respect.

Girl, I know you since
freshmen year, you lying.

Okay, when I was with
Preston, it was good.

But that's in the past. This
time it's strictly business.

Mm‐mm. So when you two
getting together?

Tomorrow night.

Khadijah, girl, good choice on

the guy you picked
for number eight.

But number 27, who
did you owe a favor?

Regine this was not
a beauty contest.

But look at number 34.
He is fine.

Mm‐mm. If only you could
just turn that picture over.

‐ See other side.
‐ I second that.

You know, it's
comforting to know that

when there are no men
around, you women can be

just as raunchy as we are.

It is a bit disheartening
to realize that right now

you ladies seem to think,
there are no men around.

Check out Kyle trying
to look all GQ.

Oh, I didn't know he
was volunteer for.

The International Red Cross.

Oh, he gave blood
all over Europe.

He was a travelling
student and he did it so

he could get free
punch and cookies.

Here's another interesting
tit‐bit about Kyle.

It says here he's married with
two children and one on the way.

What the devil!

You think you know someone.

I can't believe, I missed this.

Somebody else's bio must
have got tacked onto Kyle's.

Oh, Khadijah, he'll be so
in love with his picture

he probably won't even notice.

Mm, I wouldn't be so sure. Kyle
prides himself on two things

his bachelorhood and his ability

to raise one eyebrow
independently over the other.

[knock on door]

Hey, hey, alright. Where is it?
Where is it?

‐ Why you gave it to him.
‐ He asked.

Oh, the camera loves me.

Oh, good you got the
Red Cross thing in.

Right about now.

Khadijah, in the name
of all that is holy

what have you done to me?

It must've happened at the
printers, I'm sorry, Kyle.

I will print a retraction
in next month's issue.

Next month?

An eternity, Khadijah.

Do you realize what will happen,
when the dozens of women

with whom I've an
exclusive relationship.

Read that I'm married
with two children.

And one on the way.

I‐I don't know what to say.

I‐I'm without words.
I‐I'm speechless.

I am bereft of utterances.

So Kyle... if that's
your real name.

What's the little lady
cooking for supper, tonight?

[soft music]

We can not just throw people's
right to do process away.

No, I'm sorry but the public
defenders office has been

plea bargaining way to much.

There are lot of attorneys
out there, too concerned

with getting it done. No, no.

See, I'm concerned with
getting done right.

Yes, yes, yes. Finally
someone who agrees with me.

Oh, we can bring a whole
new energy to the office.

Well, we always did
see eye to eye.

Oh‐ho, okay.

You know, I can't believe
that it's been two years

since I mowed you down
at that ski slope.

You do make quite a first
impression, you know?

I thought a lot about
you since then.

[sighs]

Strange how we... lost touch.

Yes. Now look at us.

Practically working on top of each other.
I mean, you know..

Together.

Yeah, but... this
time no ski boots.

No room service.

No zebra skin rug.

No rug burn.

You made thawin' out fun.

And you made gettin'
warm even better.

Waiter.

Check, please.

As you all know, the district
attorney has promised

to eliminate prostitution
in New York.

Again?

Sorry, I'm late. My heel got
stuck in a manhole cover.

And I had to wait for the city
to come out with a crowbar.

Again.

There's no need to apologize.

The important thing
is you're here.

Well, since the DA is going
to pushing for convictions

I'm pleased to say that we're
going to spending time in court.

Now, I've divvy'd
up the case load

and we're working
on these in teams.

Here's the list of assignments.

Fred, you and Shirley.

Max, you'll be working with me.

Ah, sir? Not that I mind
in the least working

with my esteemed colleague, Mrs.
Catsun Baum.

But was there any particular
strategy or technique

you used to decide who would
be working with whom?

‐ I'm just curious.
‐ Nope, random.

Random. Okay, good. Thank you.

Well, if there are no further questions.
Let's get to it.

I feel like I'm wearing
a sign that says.

"Just slept with co‐worker."

At least your pantyhose
aren't on backwards.

I got dressed in record
time this morning.

‐ Yeah, but you look perfect.
‐ Thank you, so do you.

Oh, Max. We're in some pretty
dangerous territory here.

I know, I know. Office romance
is almost always failed.

And if doesn't work out, we
still gonna have to work here.

This is a no win situation. We
must stop before it gets deep.

There you go. And in a few
weeks we'll look back on this

and think, "Hey, we
made the right choice."

I'm feelin' it already. No
offence but you're not all that.

‐ Thank you. ‐ Yes.

Come here, baby.

Ah, I think, we're both
mature enough to handle this.

Hmm. Most definitely.

[knock on door]

(Fred) 'Mr. August, uh, did I
leave my day runner in there?'

Well, Khadijah.

Thanks to you and your
yellow journalism

everybody thinks
that I am married.

I can not buy a date
in this town, girl.

For $40, Synclaire and I
will go out with you.

But if you don't call us the
next day, we'll be so hurt.

Look, Kyle, if you're having
problems with these women

I will talk to them and
set them straight.

I was hoping, you'd say that.
LaDonna Martin

a woman of great beauty and
short‐temper is on hold.

Hi, this is Khadijah James,
publisher of 'Flavor'.

I just wanted to set you
straight on this whole thing

Kyle is not married,
he's very single.

Who are you calling a liar?

Let me somethin', Kyle has
more women than you can count.

He don't need you. That's right.

With LaDonna taken care of, who
else you need me to talk to?

This is unbelievable.

I mean, Kyle Barker
without a woman.

It's apocalypse now.

Oh, cheer up, shorty.
You've had droughts before.

No, no, no. Correction. I have
taken a dating hiatus before.

This‐this is uncharted
territory, I don't know.

Then, let me suggest that you
curl up with a good book.

I recommend C. J. Rollins',
Tools, Power Tools

and Battery Operated Mechanisms.

Look here, I dare you, I dare
you to read the chapter on.

"The rise of the
mighty Phillips Head."

And not be moved.

Well, Kyle, as it so
happens, I'm free tonight.

Take me to the Rainbow Room

and I'll help you
keep up appearances.

Oh, this is truly a low
point in my social life.

A platonic dinner.

Well, go, go, get dressed. Go.

Now, let's see what to wear.

I need something that says, "I'm
with him but it's a favor."

Hey, Kyle, shouldn't you
be at home with the wife

practicing Lamaze?

Hey, Maxine, shouldn't you be at
home cooking Hansel and Gretel?

Tell Regine I'll be
back in an hour.

Hey, girl. What's up? I ain't
seen you for a few days.

Well, you know the life of a
public defender, work, work.

Yes. How is Preston?

The best.

I see him at work, I seen him
after work, I've seen him later.

This is gettin' deep for you.

Dare we use the "L" word?

Absolutely. I really like him.

Oh, Max, you're so lucky.

I would love to have Obie
with me at work at Flavor.

You already spend half your time
talking to him on the phone.

Yeah, but then I wouldn't get
that nasty rash in my ear.

Oh, that's real sweet,
my little fruity pebble.

But I got a strict
policy against

mixing business with pleasure.

Have we learnt nothing
from the tragic saga

of Tom Roseanne Arnold.

Well, maybe, working together
is a problem for others.

But Preston and I
are professionals.

Isn't this cute?

Preston won this for me
today at Coney Island.

But you hate Coney Island.

Isn't that funny?

Preston hates it too but
we had a great time.

Look, not that I don't
trust your judgment but..

Do you know what the
hell you doin'?

Khadijah, I've got it
all under control.

I can have a man and
I can have my work.

And I can have my
man and my work.

What is all that?

Alright. Today I had a
little bit too much man

and not enough work.

Hey, Khadijah, Khadijah.

I have changed my mind, I do not
want you to print that retraction.

Man, I can't believe,
you'd stoop this low.

What are you up to, Kyle?

Because of your libelous remarks

I've reached dating heights
even I never dreamed of.

I'm tellin' you, I've become
a magnet for those women

who that non‐committed
feel of a married man.

You are going to burn, Kyle.

Khadijah, there are a lot of
very troubled women out there.

And some of them very beautiful.

For three dollars a minute,
they'll love you all you want.

I can't believe, you're goin'
take advantage like this.

Wait, it is they who
are taking advantage.

I am a married man.

[phone ringing]

Oh, there's a needy one now.

I feel so used.

Hello?

Sharon, I told you never
to call me on this line.

Suppose my wife would've
picked it up, huh?

You know, Vanelle is
not a stupid woman.

Yes. I'll call you later.
Bye‐bye.

[giggling]

You know, shorty, I hope Vanelle
gets half of everything you got.

This tastes better
than the usual stuff.

Yeah, it's Preston's
special blend.

‐ Oh. ‐ I wonder what's in it.

Kenyan rose and
Jamaican blue mountain.

I know my third world coffees.
Ha‐ha.

Hmm, hmm, hmm.

He can grind my
coffee beans anytime.

He's handsome and single. I
wonder if has a girlfriend.

Oh, I hear he has a very
jealous girlfriend.

That, "waits for you to
come out of your house so"

"she can run you down with
your car" kind of girlfriend.

Oh, I wonder if she knows

that his assistant is in
there with him all the time.

Just taking..

(together) Dictation.

And with the recent cuts
in federal funding I‐‐

I have to talk to you.

Gail, would you excuse us?

Well, certainly.

I will just get a cup of
your delicious coffee.

Open or close?

What is it, Maxine?

Well, for starters, she spends
way too much time in here.

She's my secretary.

Oh, and how convenient
that she's a woman. Ho‐ho.

I cannot believe
that you're jealous.

You're the one with all the
men buzzin' around you.

Fred Meyer.

Fred Meyer is a dork.

So? I saw the way he was
checkin' you out in that suit.

And if he wasn't lookin', he
was thinkin' about lookin'

That's ridiculous.

So is the notion that I have
any interest in my assistant.

Oh, please. She did not start
wearing that wonderbra

until you came along.

Well, you see, that's because
I felt that her cleavage

wasn't pronounced enough. So
I suggested she go buy one.

In fact, I went
with her to buy it.

In fact, we went to
pick it out together

walking hand in hand
through Bra World.

And why did you have to bring
your special coffee beans

in here, gettin' the
women all worked up?

Vonwel Diaz never got
so much attention.

Well, I feel like an
idiot, how about you?

Yeah.

Truth is..

I find it really difficult being
your lover and your boss.

I mean... I've seen
you in a G‐string.

Frankly, I'm seein' you
in that G‐string... now.

How do I look? Oh, nevermind.

Ah, honestly, I can't
concentrate either.

This morning when the judge
called us in to chambers

I didn't hear a single word.

Doggone!

This is not going
to work, is it?

I don't see how.

Well, maybe, you can
get another job.

Maxine, I just got here.

Well, I can't move on. I had to
get arrested to get this gig.

I don't want either
one of us to leave.

Well, then I guess we
don't have any options.

It's too bad we can't
ski for a living.

We'll always have
warming hut three.

In that perfect
mid‐night sleigh ride.

You know, if we're goin'
make a clean break of this

I'm really going to
have to hate you.

Okay.

I'll partner you with Fred.

That helps.

And I want these cases checked,
prepped and on my desk

first thing in the morning, 8 a.
M. Sharp.

You know, you are
becoming a real jerk.

And I appreciate it.

Hi. My name is Kyle Barker.

Can I buy you a drink?

Oh, this?

Yes, it is a wedding ring
and yes, I am married.

But can we not talk about it.

My wife's a very troubled woman.

You know, if it hadn't
been for little Joey

we would've divorced
a long time ago.

God, that kid means
everything to me.

If there was just
some safe harbor

from this storm
of loneliness I..

You know, a man has needs and..

So, how about that drink, huh?