Original subtitles

♪♪

This was our first time filming at a car wash,

and although I was excited to try something new,

I was also pretty nervous.

People are pretty protective of their vehicles.

And I had to trick them into thinking

I had messed up their cars.

Stop right there. Good.

Let me help you on out. -I haven't been here before.

Oh, you haven't been here before?

-No. -Okay.

Do I pay you here?

No. You pay right on over here.

Got a little...

Can you see through that okay?

What are you talking about, a scratch?

Yeah, looks like a little scratch in there.

Well, we want you to be driving safely, so...

[ Laughs ]

...we'll fix that up for you.

You can step right on over there and pay.

That lady there? Yep, right on over there to

that nice lady.

All right.

-So, just the full service? -Yeah.

[ Beep ]

[ Window shatters ]

All right, sir, I got this one all taken out for you, okay?

You've taken what out?

The driver's-side window

'cause there was the scratch.

What? What did you do to my window?

Well, I showed you there was a scratch on it.

What have you done to me? Why did you break my window?

Oh, I just smashed out the dealer window

so you'll be able to see better.

Has nobody told you that yet?

No, nobody told me about that.

Let me show you. Sure. No problem.

Look. Here, just don't touch it

with your fingers there.

Yeah.

For new cars, what you want to do as soon as you get it

is smash out the dealer window and roll up the real window.

This way, you'll be able to see without that --

look, no scratch.

You see?

Smash the window and put a new one in?

Yeah, we usually do the driver's side

and the passenger side.

Are you telling me that this is a better window

than what came with the car?

Oh, definitely, for sure.

And there's three more inside here.

There's three more windows inside that door?

Yeah. If anything happens to this one,

just smash it out and roll up the other one.

I got a little carried away with the BS here.

There weren't any more backups,

so if the vehicle owner wanted a repeat performance,

we'd have to buy him a replacement window.

-You broke my car. -Oh, no, I didn't break it.

I didn't break it. It was like this.

Is this how you drove it up?

You've ruined my car.

This is like this.

I worked so long to get this Cadillac automobile,

and -- and you -- you've broken it.

-Oh, did you just get this? -Yes.

Have you ever smashed it before?

No. You did this.

Oh, yeah. This is the best. Look.

This is what you want to do.

Look at this.

There you go. See? That's the real window.

[ Tapping ]

Yeah. [ Tapping ]

That's the better window.

Nice and clear.

When you first buy a car,

you want to smash out the dealer windows

and roll up the new ones,

'cause they drive them

and they bring them from place to place

before you get it,

and the window gets all fogged up.

So we should break all the windows.

Okay, we'll do that for free.

-Yeah. -All right. Good.

All right. You bet.

We'll get those all smashed out.

Can we get some hammers over here?

We're gonna do the whole car.

I was so focused on the magic,

that I forgot all about the crutches

until I saw the guy hobbling away.

Now, I admit, I felt kind of guilty,

but not guilty enough to stop me

from giving it another try,

as you're about to see in this unaired clip.

Why'd you smash it?

Oh, we do that for free.

We do it as a free replacement.

Come here, I'll show you. Look.

Check this out.

All cars, after '89,

they came with spare windows inside.

Look.

That's the original window.

You had the dealer window in place.

Don't scare me like that, man.

Oh, yeah, you're supposed to smash them out

when you first get the car

and then roll up the real window.

Oh, man. I ain't know that.

You scared the [bleep] out of me.

Oh, did I?

Oh, yeah, no, we do that for everybody here.

Lot of people don't know that you're supposed

to smash out the windows in the car

and roll up the real ones.

Well, I bought this new. Yeah.

And I never knew that.

We see it all the time.

If I ever knew that, I would've totally --

Yeah, 'cause you would've been like, "Don't smash my window,"

'cause who would do that?

You wait inside, and I'll smash out

the rest of them for you.

Hello.

How are you doing today?

Fine. I need a supreme with lemon.

Ooh! You got it.

All right. This is exactly the kind of person

who scares me when I'm pretending to work someplace.

She's in a hurry, she knows what she wants,

and I have zero idea what she's talking about.

All right. We'll get some...

Whoops. Hold on.

Yeah, this we don't want in here.

That's not mine.

Oh, okay. Maybe someone left it in here.

No. I just cleaned out my back.

Oh, oh. Okay.

This is my car.

-This is your car? -Yes.

Oh. Well, here, we'll put it to the side.

I have no idea whose that is.

Yeah. Just got to -- looks like a mask.

What is that?

And...

a set of gloves and...

It kind of looks like I'm a burglar.

Oh.

Are you serious?

This is not real money.

-That is. -Can't be real money.

That is real money.

How did it end up in my car?

Well, I'm not gonna say anything.

I don't care.

Well, I'm not gonna say anything,

so we can just wash the car.

Okay, you wash the car.

Do you want me to get rid of any of this for you?

No, I'll just -- I'll hang on to them.

No, listen. I mean, what I'm saying is

I could get rid of it for you, if you want.

We're very discreet here.

I appreciate that, but...

-Yeah. -...I would do it

whether you were here or not.

I would do the same thing.

Hey, that's your business.

It's better than working at a car wash, let me tell ya.

♪♪

Based on that reaction,

we all wondered if she thought someone in her family

was living a secret life of crime.

Anyway, I was curious if any other people

would get that same "Uh-oh" look in their eyes.

So check out this never-before-seen clip.

Standard wash. -Yeah.

Okay.

And we'll do the back.

Oh.

Did you want this in there?

♪♪

You got, like, a ski mask.

Uh...

This is your car, right?

Yeah, it's my car.

All right, well, here, I got a mask and, uh...

oh.

This isn't really any of my --

No, I have no idea where that [bleep] came from.

I, um -- I don't -- You know, it's client, you know,

uh, professional relationship.

This is fine. I just, uh...

No, I don't want this stuff.

You want me to get rid of it for you?

I'm gonna call the police.

Oh, I'm not -- Now my fingerprints are on it.

That's not funny. I'm not --

That's not funny.

-It's not funny. -I'm not gonna say anything.

But I -- I --

I just came from the golf shop.

I had my golf clubs in the back.

This stuff was not there.

If it's not yours, I'll tell you what we'll do.

There's even a bag, so...

I've never -- I've never had anything like this

happen to me in my life.

-Hello. -Let me take the $20.

$20 wash? You got it.

All right.

$20 -- we'll get that all clean for you.

Oh, would you want me to --

do you want me to fix the mirror?

What's that supposed to mean?

[ Gasps ]

That's what that lady just did to me!

What happened?

I was just at somewhere,

and this lady parked so close to me.

She cracked my mirror. Oh, geez.

I need to hurry up and go back there before she leaves.

Oh, well, I could fix it.

If it fixes it, you don't have to bother.

How are you gonna fix it?

Well, how many -- have you used your mirror fix yet?

No. What is that?

-Is this your car? -Yeah.

Oh, you use the mirror fix, in the back.

What is that?

Oh, every car comes with a mirror fix.

We break mirrors all the time.

It's under your seat. You never saw that?

And you can fix that? Oh, yeah.

You can fix that?

Yeah, it's like a cream that has, like,

a glass carbonate inside of it.

Okay.

And you just dab it like that on the cracked part like that

and let it kind of sit in the cracks and just dab it.

It should heal it.

You kiddin' me!

Look, look.

What the heck?

You know, it's all plastic.

Wow. You're showing me something.

Yeah. See that?

Now, how did that happen?

It just fills it in.

It's like a glass fiber carbonate, this stuff.

You just showed me something.

Honey, I was just getting ready to go crazy.

I was just about to run back there

and say, "You did this to my car."

What did she do? She smashed it into your car?

Show me where you just found it.

Oh, yeah. You want to stick this up in...

I'm sorry.

Yeah, and it just goes up into your seat back here.

Do I have anything else up under there?

Well, there's the windshield fix on the other side.

What side's that?

On the passenger side.

Mirror fix on this side. Okay.

Window fix is on the other side.

It's a spray.

And if anything happens with your tire,

reach under the back seat.

There's a tire mend.

And that's just flakes that you sprinkle over a hole.

I should enter from the back.

That's, like, what dry-cleaners usually do.

They don't stand here like, "Welcome."

When I'm preparing for a shoot,

I obsess over every detail of these tricks,

to the point that sometimes, I miss other stuff,

like the fact that my tie was insanely crooked.

I didn't notice that until we were in editing,

and it has driven me crazy ever since.

Enjoy.

No, I don't.

We had a whole bunch of stuff.

Um, let me think.

Uh, where...

You know what?

Hmm.

I might have, um...

You know what?

If you come later on...

Because I know that....

there was a whole bunch -- like, the whole team had them done

at once.

But I can't remember if they're gonna be ready

this afternoon or if they're ready this morning.

Okay.

I mostly had my back turned,

so at first, I couldn't tell if she even noticed

the amazing quick change,

but sometimes, that's my favorite reaction --

stunned silence.

I came to pick up for Dr. Regal.

-I'm sorry? -Dr. Regal.

Dr. Regal? Pick up? Mm-hmm. Yes.

Okay. Regal...

You know, there's two more bags.

Where did they put that stuff?

So, you don't know if it's for work or for personal clothing?

I'm not exactly sure.

Yeah. I haven't seen any doctor stuff.

Um...

Code blue! Doctor clothing!

I came to pick up some...

red satin shirt and white pants.

[ Laughs ] Okay.

Like a dance outfit or something?

Yes. Oh, it is?

It is. [ Laughs ] Okay.

[ Clicking tongue ]

Do you know -- Do you know when this was dropped off?

Thursday. Thursday.

Oh! Maybe it's this, um...

No, Thursday's clothes are...

Let me see. -[ Laughs ]

I don't -- If it was dropped off Thursday,

then it might not be ready until tonight,

if that's okay.

Or I could probably have it ready by 4:00.

It lo-- It is.

But you know what? It's such a coincidence

'cause it says red shirt and white pants.

Right.

[ Laughs ]

What do you mean?

I didn't mean nothing by it.

I was just saying it's just a coincidence

that you have white pants and a satin shirt.

This was a small family-run business

where most of the customers were regulars.

We had a lot of unusable takes that day

because people wanted to know who I was

and what did I do with the owners.

♪♪

[ Whistles ]

How are you doing, man? Are they here?

I don't know. I just stepped in.

You okay? [ Sighs ]

What a night, let me tell you.

Yeah, I can imagine.

It was my birthday last night.

Oh!

You just waking up?

The guys at my restaurant thought it was gonna be

really funny to throw wine on me.

I got coffee, espresso, blueberry.

Oh, you must've turned 21.

And now I have to work in an hour anyways.

It's my last shirt.

Would you do me a favor? Would you run the --

I use the Portal Press.

-Portal Press? -Yeah.

I don't work here. Oh, no, I know.

But that's okay. I pay for them monthly.

Oh, okay. I'm actually --

I can use this, right? Yeah.

Here -- just stand here and press this for me.

Okay. When?

I'm gonna step through here.

Okay, it's a little loud.

Don't be scared. It's a little bit loud, okay?

All right.

Go ahead. Press it.

There it goes.

Yeah. That looks pretty good, right?

Holy [bleep]

Did it get the blueberry out?

Yeah? You got it.

Oh, good, the ink, the ink.

That's great. Oh! I pay monthly.

You should probably look into it.

I work for a catering company, so, yeah, we get messy.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I pay 30 bucks a month.

Unlimited -- I just come in.

I don't even wash my clothes.

-Oh, yeah? -No. I just use this.

It's a lifesaver, man.

Well, I'm actually picking up.

I'm running an errand.

I'm going to work, so I'll see you around.

All right. Thanks for that.

That was awesome. Did you see that?

I did. I saw the tail end of it.

Yeah, this guy had all kind of stains on his shirt.

This place must be pretty good.

I dropped this off a very long time ago.

I'm usually a pretty quick study on the job,

but working at a dry-cleaning business

was more complicated than I thought.

The tickets, the machines --

I had no idea what I was doing.

And I think people could tell.

It's right here! This is it.

Oh. [ Laughs ]

That's it. Oh, yeah.

You know what?

Let me -- since it's been sitting here a while...

Yeah?

maybe I'll just hand-steam that a little bit.

Sure.

It's very nice.

Thanks.

Just careful of this. Yeah, no worries.

I got the resin -- you know, the hand-steaming resin?

I'll give that a little...

[ Claps hands ]

Okay.

There we go.

Wow. Yeah, we hand-steam

all of our clothes.

Is that bad for your hands?

If you're not -- If you're not good at it,

you can burn your hand, yeah.

So then, do you have to wash your hands

immediately afterwards?

You have to wash them right away.

You know, I had lunch after I did this,

and then it just totally burned the food

I was trying to eat.

Holy cow.

Woof!

On this day, we were filming an illusion

that we never exactly nailed in rehearsal.

And on top of that, we had the added challenge

of dealing with unpredictable pets.

No pressure at all.

Oh, yeah. Take one.

-Thank you. -Little grooming towel.

I was just about to do him.

Oh, thank you. Yeah.

Have you ever used one before?

-Mnh-mnh. -Oh, they're real fun.

Here, I'll show you how to use it.

It's pretty easy.

What are you doing, buddy? Are you ready for a pickup?

Do you ever get your dog groomed?

One of them, I do. We have two.

[ Clicks tongue ] Hey, you.

[ Laughs ] Are you ready?

It's just like a little swaddle.

Give him a little swaddle. Uh-huh.

And it's just like petting him with it on.

Oh!

Does your dog shed a lot?

Yes. Oh, yeah.

This is really good then.

It's awful.

How come?

Well, just because we're not good at brushing it out,

and then it gets, like, on my stairs.

It's just, like, caked. Oh, yeah.

That's why you just use the towel,

and they like it, you know?

I'll do that then.

And then it will do the cut for you.

Here it goes.

Just takes a few seconds, really.

You can feel it when it's ready.

And that should do it.

Get it? Yep. Yep.

Oh, my God!

Yeah.

How did it do that?

It's a grooming towel.

No way. You're kidding.

It's preprogrammed for a lion cut.

That's what this is.

That's -- That is wild.

It's really great.

Yeah, it's a microfiber.

They just -- They matte them out on a computer,

and they put the microfibers facing in different directions.

So, what different styles were there -- are there?

Well, for a poodle, they had one

where the middle of the body was a big puffball,

and then the tail would have two puffballs.

And then it all sticks -- you know,

all the hair just sticks right to the towel,

and you just toss it in the wash.

I cannot -- I can't get over that.

Lion cut's good if you have a dog that sheds a lot.

Mm.

Were you the one picking up the chameleon fish?

'Cause I brought him out here.

No.

Oh, okay. All right.

I don't want a fish.

You don't want the fish? No.

They can't give these things away.

No one's buying them, so we were just

gonna give one away to everybody.

There's two -- Is there two in there?

Are there any in there?

Yeah, there's two in there.

It's, like -- you got to watch for those swishes.

You've seen those before, right?

No. No?

They hide whenever there's something in the tank.

Are they just, like, itty-bitty?

No. Here, let me get a -- let me see if I can see one.

Did I get him?

Oh, there we go. See the bubble?

I never get them.

See, when they're in something that doesn't have

anything in it, they can't hide.

♪♪

>> That's some kind of bull[bleep]

I know. Isn't that crazy?

So, if you just pour him back in, he just disappears?

We sell them in these things

because it has, like, the little thing in it.

So, if I pour him in --

there he goes.

He'll instantly hide on the stick.

How the hell does that...

There he is. You see him?

Yes.

This trick perfectly demonstrates

why it's hard to trust eye-witness testimony.

If the power of suggestion is strong enough,

a person will think they see something

that isn't there.

There's that one.

Oh!

If they can't -- if there's something for them

to hide in front of, then they'll hide, you know?

-How do they do that? -I don't know.

It's like the way a chameleon works,

as long as there's nothing for them to hide in.

See? Look. Here.

-What the?! -Yeah.

What the hell?

Yeah.

I can't see them in their bag.

No, it's -- he was asking me if I wanted one.

I just saw a stick in there.

I was like, "Dude,

they're either teeny tiny fish

or you're seriously jerking my chain."

Oh, my goodness.

See? Look.

See? And then when he goes in there,

you shouldn't be able to see him.

Oh. No, no. It needs like...

A little stick.

This is how we give them up

inside the -- in the bags like this,

because it has a stick so that he'll -- see that?

And he hides in there.

-Oh! -Can you feel that?

There he is. I can feel him.

-Do you feel him? -Yeah.

Wow!

Here, man. Take him home.

We're giving them away.

Well, I got to go to work here.

Just drop him in a glass when you get there.

Just don't forget you have him, you know?

Seeing that guy get so excited about an invisible fish

might just be one of my favorite moments of the series.

Can you still see him from that side?

Yeah.

Come on up here, buddy.

There's another one.

Oh, shoot. Look at that.

Yeah. They're, like, endangered because they do--

they're -- they hide from each other,

so they, like, have trouble, you know, breeding them

'cause they don't see each other.

See? Watch.

If they go right next to each other, they can...

There's four. Oh, sh--

This is stupid.

There's, like, a whole bunch in here.

[ Laughs ]

What the...?

Hello. Hey.

-How are you doing today? -How are you?

Doing good. I'm here to pick up my

friend's dog, Walker.

Oh, Walker. Here you go.

Is that Walker?

I got Walker for you.

That's not Walker.

That's not Walker?

Oh, I'm sorry.

I was kenneling a bunch of them today.

What time were you supposed to pick him up?

I think 1:30. I'm a little bit late.

Oh!

I think I unkenneled the wrong one.

Sorry! So sorry.

Yeah, it's 1:37. Sorry.

Okay. We're gonna...

-So cute. -Let's kennel Marco back up.

Have you ever seen one of these before?

What is it? There you go, Marco.

I had him unkenneled.

Yeah.

And...

[ Rumbling ]

There we go.

Oh, my God. What?

What are you...?

Now, this trick was something I wanted to try

ever since I was a kid when I saw magician Doug Henning

compress a girl into the shape of a phonograph record.

I was so psyched to do this, we ran it multiple times.

What you're actually seeing here is the second try.

Now, here's a look at the never-before-seen first attempt.

Sorry about that. My mind is just crazy today.

There we go.

All right.

Okay, yeah, two dogs named Charlie.

Let me see here.

I think this is it.

Girl!

Give me a second here.

That should be him.

I don't think it's too revealing to say

that in a stage illusion,

when the pretty girl is put in the box,

she helps make the trick happen.

Well, puppies aren't helpful accomplices,

so this one was a really difficult effect to pull off.

Oh, my God. What?

What are you...?

There we go. Did you just see...?

Yeah, I had him -- I unkenneled the wrong one.

[ Laughs ]

You're crazy!

This is the wrong one. Yeah.

-Holy [bleep] -Sorry.

What was the dog's name?

-Walker. -Walker.

All right. Let me see what I got here.

Are you kidding me? He's gonna kill me.

Uh, Walker, Walker, Walker, Walker.

You've got to be [bleep] me right now.

No. I just -- I got myself screwed up

because my list was out of order and you came late.

Are you kidding right now?

F1 -- I think this is Walker.

What the hell?

Oh, yeah. This is what we're doing now.

It's a Japanese kenneling system.

We keep them kind of in a compression nap.

Oh, my God!

All right.

Okay.

Oh [bleep]

Hold on one second.

Here we go.

All right.

You're making me tear up.

No, no. Don't be scared. Don't be scared.

Here he comes.

Ah! There you go.

There you go.

-Holy [bleep] -Is that him?

Walker!

Aww. There he is.

Oh, my God!

There he is. There you go.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Hey, buddy.

-Is that Walker? -That is Walker.

Oh, my God, I thought you killed him.

Yeah, we do their nails and then we kennel them.

You know how puppies love to be swaddled.

Not like that.

Oh, no, it's much better

than leaving them in cages like this

where they get scared of each other.

How many dogs do you do?

It's a nice little solitude nap.

There's a lot of dogs down there.

-Hmm? -There's a lot of dogs.

Yeah. A lot of people are using the new system

because they trust it.

Oh, my God, that is him.

Holy crap.

[ Sniffles ] I thought Thomas was gonna kill me.

Okay.

All right. Well, thanks for coming in.

Please tell people that we have the new system, so...

A lot of people want to come in and try it.

I don't think they want to do it.

No, they will. Trust me.

When you read about this --

It's scary.

No, it's not scary.

They kennel with a process called the Carbonaro Effect,

which is also the name of a hidden-camera magic TV show...

Like the one you're on right now.

[ Both laugh ]

Are you serious?

I'm not kidding you.

I'm Michael Carbonaro.

You're on "The Carbonaro Effect."

[ Laughs ] Oh, my gosh.