Original subtitles

[theme song]

? Meet George Jetson ?

? His boy Elroy ?

? Daughter Judy ?

? Jane his wife ??

[music continues]

(male narrator) "The Jetsons," brought to you by

famous Colgate dental cream with activated gardol.

Brushing after eating with Colgate

helps stop bad breath.

Helps fight decay.

[instrumental music]

Hm, now, let me see.

I need a 27-letter word

meaning opposition to the idea of opposing institutes.

[device beeping]

"Antidisestablishmentarianism."

Oh, yeah, I was just gonna say that.

Oh, these crossword puzzles are a snap.

Anyone with a brain can do 'em.

Electronic brain, that is.

[laughs]

[watch buzzing]

Yeah?

[automated message] 'The time is exactly 3 o'clock.'

- 'Oh, thank you.' - 'It's alright.'

Oh, boy, quittin' time.

Ah, it's been a long day.

whoosh

Goin' down.

[whirring]

With a little luck, I might beat the traffic home.

Will you look at that traffic? The skyway is jammed.

Well, there's only one thing left.

I hate to do this, but it's the law of the traffic jungle.

The survival of the sneakiest.

[sputters]

boink

Pretty sneaky, huh?

[laughing]

Oh, boy, the trouble with these skyways

is by the time they're built, they're obsolete.

Oh, this traffic is the worst I've seen yet.

I'd better take five..

'...and stop in at the barbershop.'

Maybe while I'm having my hair thinned out

the traffic will thin out.

Hi. You the barber?

Nope. I'm just watching the shop.

- He's out getting a haircut. - Very funny.

Now, let's cut the comedy and cut my hair instead.

- Okay, I'm game if you are. - Just my luck, a funny barber.

Let's see. First, the barber chair.

Then some barber jokes.

Uh, do you know what they call small barbers?

Yeah, yeah, I know. Little shavers.

Now, will you forget the jokes and cut my hair?

Sure, which one? You got lots of them, you know.

Oh, boy.

'That should do it. How's it look?'

Just a hair too short, I'd say.

Let's keep a cool head and try this hair restorer, huh?

[hissing]

'Instant hair! How do you like that?'

- I don't like it! - 'I don't blame you.'

'You need a haircut, bad.'

That is what I came in for.

Boy, this better be good.

- Huh? What's this? - 'The very latest.'

- 'The umbrella cut.' - Umbrella cut?

What kind of a barber are you anyway?

Not too good, but I'm trying.

Look, let's forget the haircut and just give me a shave

without the snappy comebacks.

- Okay? - Okay.

Eenie, meenie, minie, mo.

I push this button, and away we go!

[whirring]

Ye-ouch!

That does it!

What are you, some kind of a sadist or somethin'?

- Now, let me out of here. - Gee, he asked for it.

I told him I wasn't a barber.

[whirring]

Well, at least the traffic's let up.

I'll be home in no time now.

screech

Hey! What's with her?

Left? Right? Up? Down?

Say, lady, I don't remember

those signals in the traffic code.

'What do they mean?'

Oh, well, it's very simple.

I was going to make a left turn home

then I remembered an appointment I had

to get my hair done.

What's the problem?

Women drivers. That's the problem.

I'm sure glad Jane doesn't drive.

That's why I always find a home where she belongs.

Gettin' my dinner. Ha-ha-ha.

Hey, what the..

'Smoke! It's coming from the superintendent's apartment.'

Oh, poor Henry's probably in there!

Better pull the fire alarm.

[alarm ringing]

The fire is this way. Follow me.

Don't worry, Henry, we'll put it out.

Relax. Relax, sonny.

Ha-ha. I'm only fixing my dinner.

[spurts]

Fixin' dinner?

Yup. Martian meatballs.

My own recipe.

You know, what you need is a wife to do your cookin'.

'A man can't be really happy without a wife and family.'

Well, maybe not, Mr. Jetson.

But he can have a lot of fun tryin'. Ha-ha.

(George) You take me, for instance, when I get home

my kids'll climb all over me, my dog will lick my hand

my wife will smother me with kisses.

Now, what does a bachelor have that I don't?

A clean suit, from the sound of it.

Look, Henry, when you have a family, you're a king.

What more can you ask for?

All I ask for is a roof over my head.

Then, a chance to raise it once in a while. Ha-ha.

Bye, now.

Poor Henry. He doesn't know what he's missin'.

Jane, I'm home.

It's me, Janey, your king.

Hmm.

Peanut butter, liverwurst, sardines..

- Uh, let's see now. - Elroy, I'm home.

- Bologna. - Bologna? What do you mean?

Is that any way to greet your dad?

Blast off!

(George) '"Blast off?'"

(Elroy) 'Not you, pop. The sandwich.'

You can't expect a guy to do fourth grade calculus

on an empty stomach.

See you later.

Oh, boy, I've had warmer greetings

from the tax collector.

Jane! Judy!

How about a date tonight, Judy?

Well, I'd love to, Bobby, but I'll have to ask mother.

Judy!

Really, daddy, they can

hear you shouting on Mars!

Well, I, uh.. Now, where's your mother?

Downtown shopping.

Um, would you excuse me, please, daddy?

This is a privatecall.

Well, there's always man's best friend.

[snoring]

Astro, I'm home!

[snoring continues]

You can jump up and lick my hand, Astro.

[smacking lips]

Oh, come on, Astro.

You're supposed to be glad to see me.

Now, come on, boy, go fetch my slippers.

- Are rou ridding? - No, I'm not kiddin'.

[snoring continues]

Sheesh, I wonder if Henry's got

any of those meatballs left.

[instrumental music]

(male 1) 'All aboard!'

[whirring]

Wait! Wait for me!

Oh, dear. Oh, I'm just exhausted!

[vehicle approaching]

Thank goodness, here comes another!

Move to the back of the bus, please.

- Excuse me. - 'Come on, folks.'

- 'Move to the back of the bus.' - Oh, pardon me.

(male 2) 'All the way back, plenty of seats in the back.'

- I beg your pardon. - 'All aboard!'

Well, that does it!

[doorbell chiming]

woof woof woof

It must be mom!

'Hi, mom!'

- Hi, rom! - 'It's your mother, alright.'

- Water. Oh, water. - 'Janey, what happened?'

- Mother, what's wrong? - Car.

Car? What do you mean, "Car?"

- I have to get one. - Ooh, scrumptious idea, mom.

- May I borrow it? - Now, wait a minute.

I've had it, George.

I've fought my last battle of the bulging bus.

I need a car.

But you don't know how to drive.

(Jane) 'My mind's made up, George.'

We absolutely must have a second car in the family.

Now, wait a minute, if you think

I'm gonna be responsible for turning another female driver

loose on the skyways, you are wrong.

The answer is no.

'Remember, what happened the last time'

'I tried to teach you to drive?'

Yes, dear. You made me very nervous.

So, who's gonna teach you how to drive?

The Aero-Space Driving School.

Ten lessons for $20.

And my first lesson is tomorrow.

- What? - Supersonic, mom!

Then you can teach me.

And if you teach me when I'm eight years old

I can get a learner's permit.

When am I ever gonna learn you can't win?

[instrumental music]

(Judy) 'I'm here for my first lesson, Mr. Sonic.'

Are you my instructor?

I wish I were, my dear, but that honor

we'll reserve for Mr. Tweeter.

He's our specialist for lovely ladies.

Step this way, please.

You know, to tell the truth, I'm a little nervous.

Calm yourself, dear lady. Calm yourself.

Mr. Tweeter is our senior instructor, you know?

Uh, he won't make me nervous, will he?

Nervous? Never.

Why, Mr. Tweeter's an expert

due for retirement with a gold stripe.

Goodness, how long has he been with you?

Three weeks.

Tweeter, quickly. Quickly, please.

Your new student is here.

Oh, dear, not another lady driver!

(Sonic) 'Come, come, Tweeter. Take your courage pill.'

'There's a good fellow.'

Aah.

gulp

Are you alright, Mr. Tweeter?

[shuddering]

Of course, he's alright. Nerves of steel.

Calm, cool, trembling to go.

Uh, what do I do first?

First, you press the s-s-solar starter button on your right.

Ah-ha.

[powering up]

Then, r-release the anti-gravity switch on your left.

Is this left? Or-or is it right?

Oh, I'm so excited!

Women drivers.

Ooh, I ought to be arrested

for running this school!

Now, push the accelerator forward.

Forward! Forward!

swoosh

- Bye, Mr. Sonic. - Oh, no!

vroom

Mrs. Jetson, the first thing we learn

is keep your eyes on the skies.

Oh, of course, Mr. Tweeter.

I'm getting the hang of it now.

- What do I do next? - I was afraid you'd ask that.

- See that little red knob? - Yes.

- 'Pull it out.' - 'Alrighty.'

But slow!

I pulled it out.

What do I do with it now, Mr. Tweeter?

Mr. Tweeter? Mr. Tweeter?

Put it back!

The knob, put it back in, quick!

(Jane) 'Oh, alright, but stop shouting.'

'You sound just like George.'

thud

And I gave up wrestling alligators

because it was too risky.

What's this other button for, Mr. Tweeter?

Don't touch it!

thud

How am I doing, Mr. Tweeter?

Fine. Dandy. Lesson's over.

Come back next year. I mean, tomorrow.

What do you mean, "Over?"

I paid for an hour, and we've been out only...five minutes.

Oh, you're wearing a watch, are you?

Funny, I would have sworn it was an hour.

Mr. Tweeter, shame on you.

Well, you can't blame a guy for trying.

Now we'll practice our stopping and starting.

screech

There, how was that?

Well, you stopped, thank goodness.

Now, before you start, look carefully to the right.

'Then look carefully to the left.'

'There's nothing around for thousands of miles..'

...so go ahead.

crash

- Now, how did I do that? - Just lucky, I guess.

Let's back up and try it again. Hmm.

Well, okay, you're the teacher.

slam

I'd have been disappointed if she hadn't done that.

- Oh, I'm sorry. - Forget it.

Let's practice backing up instead.

Okay.

[whirring]

- Wrong button, Mrs. Jetson. - Oh, is it?

[shuddering]

Now, tell me honestly, Mr. Tweeter

am I making you nervous?

[laughing] Nervous?

No, no, no. Not at all.

[blabbering]

Mrs. Jetson, I'm fine.

Good. You're much easier to drive with than my husband.

slam

crash

crash

[Tweeter blabbering]

[instrumental music]

Uh, what time do you have, Judy?

Five minutes later than the last time you asked, daddy.

- Why? - 'Huh?'

- 'Oh, just checking.' - Relax, daddy.

Mom's been gone only half an hour.

I never should have agreed to it.

She's such a helpless little thing, your mother.

She doesn't understand anything mechanical

and she gets nervous.

Oh, boy, does she get nervous!

? La la la la la la ?

? La la la la la la la ?

Mr. Tweeter, do you think I'm ready to drive in traffic?

Why not? No one lives forever.

Why, Mr. Tweeter!

[chuckles] You have a sense of humor.

Driving is easy.

Maybe all I need is one lesson.

(Tweeter) No, Mrs. Jetson! Don't try to pass!

whoosh

Even in school, my teachers said I learned fast.

Mrs. Jetson, look out!

whoosh

Don't you think I'm very good for a beginner?

You're great as a beginner.

But for me, it looks like the end.

- Stop the car, Mrs. Jetson. - What?

B-b-by the bank over there.

- 'Stop the car.' - 'Okay.'

I-I-I'll be right back.

I just wanna look in my safe-deposit box.

Right now? In the middle of our lesson?

I'm a family man, Mrs. Jetson.

I just want to check on my insurance policy.

Oh, dear, I hope it's paid up.

I'll take this line. It's a short one.

Shut up and put 'em up, in that order.

I wonder what's keeping Mr. Tweeter.

Oh, here he comes now.

Okay, lady, move it!

Come back with my uniform, you crook!

- What do I do now? - Uh, step on it, lady.

[whirring]

Say, you're not Mr. Tweeter. Are you a new instructor?

Instructor? Oh, yeah, sure.

Eh, now cut the gab and put her down here.

Yes, sir. Now, let me see.

Down is back.

crash

Hey, what's the matter with you? I said, down!

I think I ought to tell you

shouting only makes me more confused.

Well, then, down, and watch it, will you?

Alrighty.

Oh, no!

vroom

What was that?

It looks like a split-and-run driver.

After him, O'Jetski.

[siren wailing]

thud

Boy, now look what you've done!

You got the skyfuzz on my back.

Speed it up!

Well, if you're in such a hurry

why don't you just take over?

- Here. - Hey-ey-ey!

Take it back, lady. Take it back!

I can't drive!

Oh, well. They say, "Those who can't, teach."

[siren wailing]

(Jane) Say, that's a police car.

I'd better stop and see what they want.

No, no, don't stop!

- Hey, that was very neat, lady. - Well, thank you.

I'm glad I finally did something right.

But I wonder what the police wanted

and where did they go?

Uh, uh, I-I-I think they went that a-way.

We better find them. I don't wanna get a ticket.

Hey, lady, watch it!

'Look out for those buildings!'

- Oh, there's plenty of room. - No, no, no, no, no, no!

You cannot make it!

crash

See? I told you.

I think I'm doing very well for my first driving lesson.

Your f-f-first..

You mean, you-you don't know how to drive this thing?

Well, if I did, I wouldn't need lessons from you, would I?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Now, just keep cool.

- Do-o-on't get nervous. - 'Oh, I'm not nervous.'

Oh, good. Then, get us down now.

swoosh

Down, lady. Down!

Well, I'm trying.

There, that should do it.

- Hey, there they are, O'Jetski. - Hold it, you two!

It's the police. They're saying something to us.

Yeah, and I wanna say somethin' to them.

- Help! Get me out of here! - Really?

Well, the feeling is mutual.

I'd just as soon go back to Mr. Tweeter.

Okay, lady, anything.

Just get me out of here!

Some driving instructor you are!

Now, where is that school?

Oh, yes, I turn left here.

whir

And I never should've left the rock.

Maybe I should've turned right.

I think I'm gettin' airsick.

Oh, well, I'll just drive around till I find it.

(man on TV) 'So much for the news of the planets.'

'On the local scene, a bank robbery'

'and a stolen getaway car.'

We have here an eyewitness, Mr. Titus T. Tweeter

instructor at the Aero-Space Driving School.

Aero-Space? That's where Jane is.

Just tell us in your own words what happened, Mr. Tweeter.

[stammering]

I see. And then what?

Well-well, I was giving this lady a driving lesson.

- Her name, please? - Mrs. Jet Georgeson. Uh..

- I mean, Mrs. George Jetson. - Jane!

(Tweeter on TV) 'Well, when I stepped into the bank'

there was Knuckles Nuclear with a gun.

He stole my uniform and my car.

With Mrs. Jetson in it?

- Yes, the poor thing! - Mrs. Jetson?

- No. Knuckles. - It's a dramatic story, folks.

The stolen getaway car with the helpless Mrs. Jetson in it

has eluded the police completely.

Oh, Janey's in trouble.

I better get down to the police station.

Really, Mr. Whatever-your-name-is

will you please give me some directions?

I can't find my way back to your school, and I..

Oh, honestly!

What a time to take a nap.

Well, mother always said

"When you're lost, ask a policeman"

and that looks like a police station down there.

Oh, if I can just find the down button.

[whooshing]

Halt, in the name of the law!

thud

No, Mr. Mayor, no sign of the getaway car yet.

whoosh

Hold it, Mr. Mayor. I think we got a clue.

[glass shattering]

Oh, dear, how do I stop this thing?

I've got all these little buttons mixed up.

screech

(male 3) 'Help! Run for your life!'

crash

- Jane! - George!

Oh, thank goodness you're safe!

Wh-wh-where am I?

Oh, no! Not you!

Arrest me! Please! Please arrest me.

Please, you guys. Put me away. Please!

[sobbing]

Lock me up in a nice, strong cell...on the ground.

You know, George, I really don't care much about driving anyway.

Well, it's probably better if you don't, Janey.

Driving requires a man's skill, a man's judgment

a man's technical know-how.

And what about a man's eyesight, George?

What do you mean?

You just went through a red light.

crash

Okay, buddy, let's see your license.

Gosh, officer, I didn't even see that light change.

I've been driving a long time without a ticket.

And without a license, too. It expired last year.

I got a violator here, Your Honor.

Expired license, ran a red light

and hit a parked car

with a license number 8-7-5-B-3-6.

Uh, no previous violations.

Well, in that case, we'll let him off with a..

8-7-5-B-3-6?

That's my car!

tap tap tap

License suspended!

Had your license suspended, eh, Mr. Jetson?

Yeah, Henry.

I guess I'll be riding the bus

for a while.

Well, you know, riding the bus isn't so bad.

In fact, that's how I met my fiancee.

Fiancee? You? The confirmed bachelor?

Yep. I took your advice.

Time I settled down, you know.

Step to the back of the bus. All the way back.

'Plenty of room in the rear.'

There she is, Mr. Jetson.

[chuckles] The future Mrs. Henry Orbit.

- You mean, the bus driver? - Yep, that's her. He-he.

- 'Hello, Ariel.' - Pupsie!

(Henry) 'Hello, poopsie.'

Isn't she cute, Mr. Jetson?

You know, after we're married, Ariel's gonna help me park cars

at the apartment house.

Right, poopsie?

Right, pupsie.

Sounds fine, Henry.

Well, let's face it, there'll always be women drivers.

Yep. Heh-heh-heh.

Isn't it great?

(male narrator) "The Jetsons.."

...brought to you by..

[theme music]

[screeching]

boink

Help! Help!

Jane, stop this crazy thing!

Jane!

Help! Jane!

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