Original subtitles

bam bam bam

[indistinct chatter on TV]

(man on TV) 'It's a right to the jaw by Stoney Curtis.'

'Rocky Neanderthal counters with a stiff uppercut to the jaw.'

'Fighters are slugging it out in the center of the ring'

'and the crowd is going wild!'

Come on, Rocky boy, give me a little one, two!

[bell dings on TV]

Boy, what a round, huh, Fred?

What a great idea puttin' in the extra TV sets.

Yeah. He he. Now, we can all watch the program

we want at the same time.

(Fred) 'We're watchin' the fights, kids are watchin' the cartoon'

and Wilma and Betty are watchin' their favorite program.

- Everybody's happy! - Yeah.

No arguments, no fuss, no twistin' the dial.

No.. eh, eh, eh, ooh, I'm going to sneeze

That darn allergy of mine!

Uh, uh, uh..

Ah-choo!

[glass breaking]

Gee, Fred, look. You sneezed a hole right through the TV tube.

Now we're gonna miss the rest of the fight.

Oh, no, we're not. We'll watch it on Wilma's set.

[theme song]

[siren blaring]

? Yabba dabba doo ?

? Flintstones meet the Flintstones ?

? They're the modern stone age family ?

? From the town of Bedrock ?

? They're a page right out of history ?

? Let's ride with the family down the street ?

? Through the courtesy of Fred's two feet ?

? When you're with the Flintstones ?

? Have a yabba dabba doo time ?

? A dabba doo time ?

? We'll have a gay old time ?

[chatter on TV]

(Fred) 'Oh, darling. I, uh--'

No, Fred. You cannot watch the fight on my set.

What do you mean, your set? I paid for it.

Sorry, this set is in use.

Well, of all the nerve, I..

Eh, eh..

Ah-choo!

- Oh, sorry, girls. - Really, Fred?

(man on TV) 'Are you feeling a little taste..'

Uhh, you simply got to do something

about your allergy.

That sneeze of yours is a lethal weapon.

[man sneezing on TV]

- Huh? - Ah-choo, ah-choo, ah-choo!

Suffering from an allergy?

Can't stop sneezing?

Then it's time to take a Scram.

When you feel a sneeze coming on, just take a Scram

and watch the surprising result.

[rumbling]

Oh, I go for a man who doesn't sneeze.

Scram, we wanna be alone.

Scram, works every time.

Hey, nice commercial, huh, Fred?

Almost makes me wish I had an allergy.

Come on, Barney. Let's go.

Where are you going at this hour? It's late.

Where do you think I'm going?

Down to the drugstore to get some "Scram."

Hey, wait a minute, Fred. What's the hurry?

You can pick some up in the morning.

[mumbling]

Uh, uh, eh..

Ah-choo!

thud

Okay, Fred. Let's go. I can take a hint.

[phone ringing]

[cawing]

Bedrock Pharmacy, Bedrock Pharmacy.

We give stamps. We give stamps.

'This is a recording.'

That's fine, Polly.

Let me have the phone now, I'll take care of it.

Bedrock Pharmacy. Goose Pimple speaking.

Oh, it's you, Mrs. Boulderdane.

Yes, your prescription is ready.

Come right in, yes. Ta-ta!

Now, Polly, let's see if my little pills are done.

Crazy pills, crazy pills.

Goose Pimple's crazy pills.

Quiet, you barmy bird!

I'll make a fortune out of them.

(Goose) 'Goose Pimple's Pepstone pills.'

Guaranteed to cure everything.

Also can be used as a detergent for your laundry.

Or to remove stains from your rug.

You know, Polly.

I should try one first

before putting them on sale.

gulp

Not bad, not bad.

I'm beginning to feel like a new man already.

[rumbling]

[chattering]

It's me, Mr. Goose Pimple.

I've come for my prescription.

Oh, Mr. Goose Pimple. Where are you?

[chattering]

Oh, there you are, Mr. Goose Pimple.

I..

[screaming]

Help!

Help!

[chattering]

Well, here we are, Barn..

Ah, ah, ah

Ah-choo!

thud

You know, Fred, if you could harness

the power in that sneeze

we could forget about payin' electric bills.

[chuckles]

N-n-never mind the wise cracks.

I need some of that Scram.

Yo, Mr. Goose Pimple?

Mr. Goose Pimple?

I wonder where he is.

Goose Pimple is out. Goose Pimple is out.

This is a recording.

Oh, thank you very much.

Now, what do I do about my allergy?

Oh, look there, Fred.

'Enough Scram to supply an army.'

'Well, of course, it will have to be an army of sneezers.'

[chuckles]

You wouldn't think it was so funny if you had..

Eh, eh, eh..

Ey, ey..

Ah-choo!

[clattering]

Uh-oh, looks like you just bought yourself

a life's supply of Scram.

There's one bottle left.

I'll take it now. I'll pay Mr. Goose Pimple later.

Let's get outta here, Barney.

[clears throat] I feel better already.

screech

[chattering]

[rumbling]

Oh, my. I feel so strange.

What am I doing out here?

The last thing I remember is taking one

of my Pepstone pills.

I wonder if that has anything to do with it.

Mm, I better have another look at those pills.

Hey, this night air has made me hungry, Barney.

How about stoppin' off at the Pizza Rock Palace

for a little snack?

Yeah, okay.

I could go for a pizza-pizza myself.

[both laugh]

Now, let me get this straight.

That's two bowls of minestrone

two king-size pizza rocks

two side orders of a pterodactyl cacciatore, and for dessert

'two extra large portions of macaroni spumoni.'

And that's it for me, waiter.

What are you gonna have, Barney?

You got me, Fred.

After that order, they'll probably

have to send out for somethin'.

[chuckles] "Send out?" Ha-ha!

- That's a good one. Ha-ha-ha. - Hey, Fred.

- I just thought of somethin'. - What?

Betty and Wilma don't know we're stoppin' off.

Oh, that's right. They'll be worried.

Hey, why don't you phone 'em, let 'em know where we are?

Yeah, good idea.

Yeah, you tell..

- Uh-uh, uh-uh - Uh-oh.

Ah-choo!

thud

You don't have to get pushy, Fred.

I told you I'd phone.

Well, that settles it.

Either that allergy goes, or I do.

I'm going to take one of these Scram pills right now.

It's where medical science goes to work.

[rumbling]

[chattering]

Here you are, mister.

I bring the other bowl of soup

in a couple of minutes.

[chattering]

Ah, ah, ah, h-h-he-he-he..

Help!

[chattering]

[whooping]

I spoke to Betty, Fred.

Uh, she and Wilma want us

to bring them home a pizza.

[chattering]

Uh, what did you say, Fred? You're mumbling again.

[chuckling]

Okay, okay. What's the joke? I bite.

[laughing]

Very funny, Fred. Very funny.

For a minute, I thought you was an ape.

[laughing]

'Hey, that's a very good mask, Fred.'

Hey, where'd you get it, huh?

snap

[growling]

bam

[chattering]

W-w-wait, wait, wait a minute.

I-I've seen this bit before on TV

the horror show, yeah, it's no stunt.

I don't know what happened but Fred has really

turned into an ape.

Ooh, tough luck, Fred. But I'm gettin' outta here.

[chattering]

Help! Help! Somebody help!

'My pal has gone ape!'

Help! Help! Call the zoo!

Get the nets!

boing

I'll net you, mister!

What's all the hollerin' about?

Oh, i-it's my friend, Fred.

H-he's turned simian.

I don't care what his political views are.

Stop disturbin' the peace.

[chattering]

Ah, ah, w-w-who's that?

Well, that used to be Fred Flintstone.

Let me outta here!

Me too!

[chattering]

Poor Wilma. How will I ever break the news to her?

[chattering]

Oh, well. Maybe she won't notice the difference.

[laughing]

I asked Barney to bring home a pizza.

They should be here any minute.

[Dino growling]

Yum-yum-yum-yum-yum.

[panting]

[both laughing]

Yes, Dino. They'll bring some for you too.

screech

Oh, boy. Have I got somethin' to tell you, Wilma.

I know. Fred dropped the pizza.

Oh, it's worse than that. Uh, hey, maybe you better sit down.

- She is sitting down. - Uh-oh.

W-well maybe you could take it better standin' up.

Take what, Barney?

Has anything happened to Fred?

Well, ah, ah, yes, uh, you might say that. Yes.

What's happened to him, Barney? Tell me!

Well, to put it bluntly, Wilma

your husband has reversed the process of evolution.

He's what?

Wilma, how would you feel about having

another pet around the house?

Will you stop this silly chattering, Barney?

It's Fred who's doin' the chattering.

He's turned into an eek-eek-eek-eek.

What's an "Eek-eek?"

If this is another one of your gags, Barney, we don't get it.

Oh, well, let me put it this way.

Fred has turned into an ape.

- What? - What?

Oh, I don't believe it.

I know Fred has bad manners

but he's not an ape.

[chattering]

- What's that? - That's Fred.

Now, don't say I didn't warn you.

[chattering]

Huh?

[rumbling]

Boy, do I feel funny.

Must've been somethin' in my minestrone soup.

And where did Barney go?

Boy, some friend.

Hi, Wilma. I'm back.

- Fred! - Fred!

It's you! H-hey, what happened?

You're not an ape anymore.

Ape? What're you talkin' about?

And why the heck did you run off and leave me, Barney?

Imagine telling us that Fred was an ape

and upsetting Wilma like that.

He said what?

Barney, are tryin' to make a monkey out of me?

I'll take care of it, Fred.

Just wait till I get you home.

Honest, Betty, he hit me

and jumped up and down on a chair

and he kept yelling "Eek-eek-eek-eek."

What is he talkin' about?

What is this "Eek-eek" stuff?

Ah, he'll get over it, I'm sure.

By the way, you know what tomorrow is?

[chuckling] Sure. Sunday.

And I've already made out my schedule.

First, I get up late, and I eat

and I go back to bed, and then I--

Wrong schedule, Fred.

Tomorrow is the day you promised to take Pebbles to the zoo.

The zoo? Uh..

B-but, uh-uh, maybe the animals aren't feelin' well.

Eh, I hear there's a zoo virus goin' the rounds.

We'll wear face masks.

Goodnight, Fred. I'm going to bed.

Eek-eek, eek-eek.. He-he.

[chuckles]

Eek-eek. Heh, that's cute.

Well, I think I'll read a little bit before I hit the sack.

I am feelin'.. Eh, eh..

Eh, eh, eh..

'Ah-choo!'

thud

Sorry, Dino.

Guess it's time for another Scram pill.

Eh, boy. I feel better already.

Sorta makes me feel like a new man.

[rumbling]

[chattering]

Can't I apologize in the morning?

- I-it's kinda late, Betty. - I don't care.

You march right back there and apologize to Fred.

But honest, Betty, Fred was an ape.

Uh, with a furry face and everything.

(Betty) 'Barney, you were imagining it.'

Well, yeah, you're right.

Must've been a hallucination

whatever that is.

I'll go over and apologize right now.

That's the spirit.

Maybe, I ought to see a doctor or somethin'.

Thinkin' my best pal has gone ape.

Oh, I'm, uh, glad you're still up, Fred, uh..

'About this monkey business'

'I hope you didn't take me seriously.'

[chattering]

Uh, yeah. Well, as I was sayin', you're no more an ape than I am.

[chattering]

boing

That does it!

slam

Help! Help!

Barney, what's wrong?

screech

[panting] You know that hallucination of mine?

Ooh, well, it ain't.

Fred is standing in the doorway

eating a banana.

A-and he's a genuine

one hundred percent ape.

That does it, Barney. You and your jokes.

Don't talk to me.

That's what I always liked about Betty.

She's got complete faith in me.

Zoo, zoo. Zoo!

That's right, Pebbley-poo.

We're at the zoo.

Daddy always keeps his wordy.

Especially when mommy makes him.

Gee, Betty, I'm so pleased that you and Barney

'decided to spend the day with us.'

Me too.

I thought you said Fred was an ape.

Well, that was last night. He must've slept it off.

Well, what'll it be, folks?

Dinosaurs, wooly mammoths, apes--

I saw one of them last night.

- No, thanks. - Barney.

Uh, let's watch the pterodactyls, eh?

They're fun, huh?

That's okay with me, Barney.

The pterodactyls it is.

[sobbing]

Oh, what is it, honey?

I think she wants to see the apes, Fred.

[mumbling]

Ah, later, honey, later.

Right now, daddy's gonna take you

to see the big, funny bird.

[Pebbles crying]

Alright, alright!

Alright, alright!

We'll go see the apes.

Uh, Wilma, why don't you and Barney and Betty

go see the pterodactyls, and we'll meet you there later?

Okay, Fred. Bye-bye, Pebbles.

Now remember, Pebbles, this is the last time

you're getting your own way.

At least, for this afternoon. He-he-he.

Here we are, sugar.

Now, this one is called Annie.

Hi, Annie. You read any good books lately?

[growling]

Ooh, boy. What a temper.

I wouldn't wanna be her boyfriend.

No wonder she's still single. He-he.

Uh, uh-uh, uh..

I, I feel a sneeze comin' up.

Ah, eh..

Ah-choo!

[groaning] I'd better take a Scram.

[rumbling]

[chattering]

[mumbling]

[laughing]

[mumbling]

[chattering]

And I gave her a good piece of my mind.

I said, "Helen, if you can't manage your household

any better than this, I'll stop coming over for supper."

Oh, that was putting her in her place, Minerva.

She's such a busy-body, anyhow.

[Fred chattering]

Oh, isn't that cute?

That ape is pushing that baby carriage.

Yes, isn't that darling?

- Ape! - Ape!

Oh, help! Help! Loose Ape!

- Somebody call the keeper! - Help! Help!

Quiet down, ladies, quiet down.

This is a respectable zoo. What's all the racket about?

Oh, my!

[indistinct yelling]

[chattering]

[laughing]

Holy mackerel, an ape!

Hey, you! Stop in the name of the law!

[chattering]

Come back here with that kid, you big ape!

screech

screech

There's the kid's carriage, but where's the kid?

What the..

[chattering]

Alright, wise guy. Give me that hat.

Give me that hat!

thud

snap

Come on, fella, be reasonable. Let me have that kid!

I-I'll give you some bananas.

[chattering]

I'll eek-eek you when I get my hands on you, wise guy.

Hey! Cut that out!

Let me off! Let me off!

screech

Which way did they go, Annie?

[chattering]

Thanks.

Boy, if there's one thing I can't stand

that's a wise guy ape.

screech

Well, here's the baby, thank goodness.

Uh, which way did the ape go, kid?

Daddy. Da-da.

[chuckling]

Oh-oh, never mind. I-I'll find him.

You stay here till I come back.

[chattering]

screech

Gee! What an ugly statue!

'I've never noticed it before.'

[rumbling]

splash

That's no statue! That's the ape!

'Alright, you! Stay where you are!'

Halt! Halt!

Or I'll use my tranquilizer gun.

[chattering]

Okay, you're askin' for it, ape!

[groaning]

[chattering]

[snoring]

That takes care of him.

Hey. That's not one of our apes.

Must've escaped from another zoo.

Well, I'll just throw him in with Annie

'while we run a check on him.'

[snoring continues]

How about that?

Annie seems to like the new ape.

'Well, if nobody claims him, we'll just keep him.'

Anyway, he'll be safe in there.

[chattering]

[snoring]

[rumbling]

Gee, Wilma..

...the longer we're married

the more I appreciate you.

You're a wonderful wife, Wilma.

[chattering]

Huh? Ah!

You're not Wilma!

Y-y-you're Annie!

Help! Let me outta here!

[chattering]

Help! Help!

Let me outta here!

Somebody do something! Let me outta this cage!

Help! Help!

I don't understand it.

Fred said he'd meet us here an hour ago.

Ooh, I'm sure there's nothing to worry about, Wilma.

Well, yeah, I mean, what's the worst

that could've happened? So he got bit by a saber tooth tiger.

Will you be quiet?

Oh, I'm sorry.

(Pebbles) 'Mama! Mama!'

Pebbles! What're you doing all alone?

'Where's daddy?'

[mumbling]

(Fred) Help! Help!

Well, don't just stand there! Somebody call the zoo-keeper.

What a act! They should be on television.

It's Fred! What's he doing in there?

[laughing]

Always the funny man.

Hey, Fred! What are you doin' in there?

What do you think I'm doing? Surfing?

Get me outta here!

Oh, dear! What will we do?

That ape is gonna hurt Fred.

Bam-bam. Bam-bam.

screech

Bam-bam.

(Fred) Thanks, Bam-Bam.

Bam-bam, bam-bam-bam.

Atta boy, Bam-bam. Ooh, such strength.

Well, like father, like son.

Fred, are you alright?

Yeah, thanks to Bam-Bam.

But please, Wilma, from now on

if Pebbles wants to go to the zoo, you take her.

Anything you say, dear.

How did you get in that cage in the first place?

Well, yeah. Somethin' like that can cause a lotta talk.

Uh, what's your story?

Beats me.

All I can remember is wakin' up

and thinkin' that ape was Wilma.

Oh, is that so?

You want me to put you back with Annie?

[chuckles] No, honey.

Honestly, you're my first choice anytime.

Oh, Fred. You big ape.

[both laugh]

Mm.

Well, looks like I got you, Barney.

- Your move. - Oh, my move, huh?

Well, let me see, uh..

There must be some way out of..

Ah, ah..

Ah-choo!

Well, there goes the checkers.

- I guess we can call it a draw. - Draw?

I ought to clobber you sneezin' my men off the board!

Well, I'm sorry, Fred.

I guess, I caught your, uh, uh..

Ah-choo!

Your allergy. Okay.

Oh, I-I better go home.

Oh, gee, Barn, I don't want you to spend the night

sneezin' on account of me.

Here. Here, take the last of my Scram pills.

Oh, oh. Thanks, Fred.

You'll feel like a new man in a few minutes.

Yeah, I-I'll just go home and get some sleep.

- Goodnight, Fred. - 'Night, Barn.'

Fred's right. I feel different already.

[rumbling]

[chattering]

Ah? Ah, ah, ah!

Hey, Wilma!

What is it, Fred? You'll wake up Pebbles.

It's Barney! He turned into an ape!

Oh, no! Not again!

[chattering]

[theme song]

? Flintstones meet the Flintstones ?

? They're the modern stone age family ?

? From the town of Bedrock ?

? They're a page right out of history ?

? Someday maybe Fred will win the fight ?

? Then that cat will stay out for the night ?

? When you're with the Flintstones ?

? Have a yabba dabba doo time ?

? A dabba doo time ?

? We'll have a gay old time ?

? We'll have a gay old time ?

Wilma!

[instrumental music]

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