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Here's the evening paper, mother-in-law dear.
You read it first.
Take my chair, mother-in-law dear.
I will sit on a box.
But I insist, mother-in-law dear
you take the biggest steak.
Fred, I wanna thank you for being so nice to mother.
I'm trying, Wilma. I'm trying hard.
I know, dear. And I think you're winning her over.
I sure hope so.
crash
Why don't you look where you're going, clumsy?
I'm sorry, mother-in-law dear.
I didn't expect you to stick your foot out.
I love my mother-in-law. I love my mother-in-law.
[theme song]
[squawks]
Yabba-dabba-doo!
? Flintstones meet the Flintstones ?
? They're the modern Stone Age family ?
? From the town of Bedrock ?
? They're a page right out of history ?
? Let's ride with the family down the street ?
? Through the courtesy of Fred's two feet ?
? When you're with the Flintstones ?
? Have a yabba-dabba-doo time ?
? A dabba-doo time ?
? We'll have a gay old time ??
[instrumental music]
Hey, Fred, why you're leaving the freeway?
I know a shortcut to the other highway, Barney.
A shortcut? Hey, you are headed for the river.
Relax, Barney-boy.
splash
Hey, stop, Fred, we'll sink.
Stop worrying. See, we didn't sink.
But don't just sit there, Barney.
- 'Tread water.' - 'Oh, okay.'
[Fred laughing]
This is one time your big feet came in handy, Barn, huh?
Yeah, look who's talkin'.
Yeah. That wasn't so bad, was it?
No, not so bad
if you, uh, don't count him.
[rumbling]
Some shortcut, huh, Barney-boy?
There, now we're on the back road.
Well, what's all the rush to get home, Fred?
Well, Wilma's gonna be a mother soon.
It's my duty as the daddy to be home with her
as much as possible.
What are you starin' at me for?
Well, Fred, I, uh
I was just trying to picture you as a daddy
but it's no use. You're just not the type.
[laughs]
'What do you mean I'm not the type?'
Well, uh, gee, Fred, uh, no offense
but fathers are supposed to be
kind, considerate, thoughtful.
'And you strike out on all three, Freddy-boy.'
screech
Well, what'd you stop here for, Fred?
Get out of this car.
- Oh, you're kiddin', Fred. - Out! Out! Out!
See, that's just what I mean, Fred.
You are not kind, considerate, thoughtful.
You're just not the daddy type.
I-I tell you what I'll do, Fred. I'll help ya.
You can practice being nice on me.
Uh, yeah, yeah.
Oh, okay, Barney. I, I'm sorry.
I'll be kind, considerate and thoughtful of you.
Now, if you two have patched up your little spat
would you please move on? You're blocking traffic!
[cars honking]
Ye-yes, sir. Officer, s-sir. Y-yes, sir!
Hi, Wilma. May I come in?
Of course, Betty. I'm in the kitchen.
I was just gonna peak and see if the lobster is cooked.
[sizzling]
Down, boy. Down, down.
- It's not quite done yet. - I'll say.
Uh, Wilma, do you think you should be cooking
and doing house work in your, um, condition?
Betty, I'm feeling fine
and Fred's a dear. He's been doing the cleaning.
- Fred? - Yes.
And picking up and putting away his things.
That cuts a woman's work in half.
[car approaching]
screech
- Sounds like the boys are home. - So I hear.
[giggles] See you later, Wilma.
Okay, Betty.
Hi, Betty. Wilma okay?
Little old mama-to-be is just fine
oh, big daddy-to-be.
[laughing]
Boy, that Betty and Barney. What a screwball couple.
[Dino barking]
'No. No, Dino, no. No!'
crash
Oh-o-o-o, Dino. Stop! Ooh, stop it, boy.
Ha-ha-ha! Cut it out. Cut it..
Oh, knock it off, you two.
Why, Fred, you brought me flowers.
Well, no, Wilma. That's a present for the baby.
Go ahead, open it.
[paper rustling]
- A baseball bat? - Isn't that a dandy?
I'm gonna teach junior to be a ball player.
Who knows, maybe he'll turn out to be
one of those bonus babies you read about.
- 'Oh, well, Fred?' - Yes, sweetheart?
Supposing, uh, just supposing..
'Yeah, yeah?'
Supposing junior turns out to be a little girl?
Great!
Thank heaven for little girls!
She might make the big league some day.
[telephone ringing]
I'll get it, Fred.
Hello? I can't hear you.
Would you speak louder, please? That's better.
'Who?'
'Oh, mother?'
snap
Oh, no!
Tell her to stay home! No visitors allowed!
'The place is quarantined'
out of bounds, off limits!
You can hear a loud what, mother?
Oh, oh, a loud mouth.
[chuckles]
Oh, uh, mother's only kidding, Fred.
Well, I'm not kidding. Tell her to stay home.
'Mother hasn't said a word about coming here.'
Not yet, she hasn't, but she will.
Oh, that's good, mother.
Your plane arrives at 5:00, Bedrock Airport.
I told you. I told you!
Fred will be there to meet you, mother. Bye.
Fred, I want this silly feud between you and mother stopped.
Instead of hating mother, tell yourself you like her.
Ha! That's a hot one.
Fred, if you thought anything of me, you'd try it.
Hm. Maybe Wilma's right.
Maybe it is my attitude.
Well, I, uh, I could give it a try.
I like my mother-in-law.
There, I said it.
It wasn't easy, but I said it.
I'm on my way to the airport
to meet my dear mother-in-law.
I'm on the way to the airport. I love my mother-in-law.
Hello, darling.
Ah, here we are. Bedrock Airport.
I love my dear, sweet mother-in-law.
My mother-in-law is a doll.
I love my dear, sweet mother-in-law.
My mother-in-law is a--
Are you feelin' alright, mister?
Huh? Yeah, yeah. I'm okay.
Good, good. You just stay in here and rest.
That hot sun outside is a killer.
Poor guy. He must've been standing in it for hours.
(man on PA) Attention.
Flight 36 now arriving from Rock Creek
Arrowhead and Stone Axe.
Passengers will exit at gate eight.
Well, if my voice
only sounded like that for real.
Here comes mother's plane.
I hope it makes a nice smooth landing.
whirr
'Boy, look at that wing spread.'
Keep its nose up. Keep its nose up!
screech
crash
Boy, how smooth can a landing get?
Good landing, Bill. That's keeping the old nose up.
Watch your step, folks. Step carefully, please.
You may claim your baggage at gate eight.
Hey, there she is.
I love my mother-in-law. I love my mother-in-law.
Hey, mother-in-law. Here I am, sweetie.
Oh, no.
He's been dippin' into the cactus juice.
My, you're looking beautiful.
[kissing]
thud
Alright, sneaky, what have you been up to?
I love my mother-in-law.
Let's hold that thought. I love my mother-in-law.
Oh, stop mumblin' and put my luggage in the car
if you think you can stagger that far.
Coming, mother.
growl growl
- Uh, watch out for that truck. - Yes, mother-in-law dear.
And slow down. You're full of cactus juice, you know?
I haven't had one drop of cactus juice in months.
Ha!
And like they say
don't raise a fuss, leave the driving to us.
[laughs]
Oh, boy.
I love my mother-in-law. I love my mother-in-law.
Will you stop babblin'? You're driving too fast.
'I am not driving too fast, mother-in-law dear.'
All speedometers are a little bit off
so they allow you five or ten miles leeway.
[sirens blaring]
Alright, you, pull over.
screech
I told you. You were driving too fast.
[engine revving]
I like her.
Fifty miles an hour
in a thirty-five-mile zone.
You're in a big hurry.
Your wife gonna have a baby or somethin'?
Why, yes, my wife is gonna have a baby.
She is? Okay, mister, just follow me!
Ye-ye-yes, officer.
[engine revving]
vroom
- What's this all about? - I don't know.
He said follow, so I'm following.
vroom
I can read it now.
"A lake officer races stork to hospital."
This might even get my picture in the paper.
Come on, step on it!
We are going 60. This is crazy!
I know. I know!
[siren blaring]
"Bedrock Maternity Hospital?"
Yeah, what's this all about?
Come on, lady. I got you here in time.
Put me down. Put me down!
Just relax, lady. You'll be alright.
We'll forget the speeding ticket in this case, mister.
- Uh, uh, thanks, officer. - Yeah, well, good luck.
Now, to give this story to the newspapers.
She's been given a mild sedative.
You may wait and see her when she wakes.
To see her? That's the last thing I wanna do.
Well, some father he'll make.
vroom
screech
That sounds like Fred's car, Dino. Let's go meet mama.
[barking]
Go on, Dino. Say hello to mama.
[barking]
Hey!
[yapping]
Wilma, what is with this crazy Dino?
Oh, he's just excited about mama coming.
Where is she, Fred? Still in the car?
No, the last I saw her
she was going into the maternity hospital.
Maternity hospital? Why did she go there?
- It was the cop's idea. - The cop?
- 'Let me at him!' - Mother.
Where is he? I-I'll-I'll tear him apart.
I'll, I'll pulverize him.
Mother, remember your blood pressure.
Where, where are you
you, you, you son-in-law?
Now, it wasn't my fault, mother-in-law dear.
I had to do what the officer told me to do.
Fred, will you please leave?
'Uh, go see if dinner is cooked.'
G-g-glad to, Wilma.
I like my mother-in-law. Oh, I like her so much.
Yeow!
Ow, Wilma!
Dinner is not quite cooked yet, sweetheart.
clack
Oh, go on, mother, shake hands with Fred.
Yeah, mother. Let's be friends.
I'm sorry about what happened.
Oh, alright.
For your sake, Wilma. Here.
[groaning]
Mother, you shouldn't have done that.
[laughs] Can I help it
if I don't know my own strength?
Oh, o-oh, she's a doll, a million laughs.
Here's the evening paper, mother-in-law dear.
You read it first.
Take my chair, mother-in-law dear.
I will sit on a box.
But I insist, mother-in-law dear
you take the biggest steak.
Fred, I wanna thank you for being so nice to mother.
I'm trying, Wilma. I'm trying hard.
I know, dear. And I think you're winning her over.
I sure hope so.
crash
Why don't you look where you're going, clumsy?
I'm sorry, mother-in-law dear.
I didn't expect you to stick your foot out.
I love my mother-in-law. I love my mother in law.
Oh, how'd you like the fight on TV last night, Fred?
I didn't see it, Barney.
Wilma's mother doesn't like to watch other people fighting.
[laughs] You two never did get along
Fred, so why worry?
What really worries me is how I am gonna afford the baby crib
Wilma wants. It costs 25 bucks.
Oh, uh, hey, Fred
uh, Charlie Boulder, the cab driver
he works only in the day time.
I bet he'd let you use his hack at night
so you could make some extra money.
Oh, no. No, Barney. No, that's out.
Somebody'd see me driving the cab
and tell Wilma and my boss, Mr. Slate.
Neither one of them wants me to be holdin' down two jobs.
Well, Fred, uh..
[chuckles]
...the only way around that
is to disguise yourself while driving.
Uh, you know, uh, wear a false moustache.
screech
Barney, that's a great idea!
- It is? - Absolutely!
Tonight I'll tell Wilma I'm going out to cruise around
which will be the truth
only, she'll think I mean a walk.
In a couple of nights
I oughta make enough money to buy the crib!
[instrumental music]
[bleating] Good thing the weather is warm
Wh-h-h-itey.
You said it, Ba-a-a-lacky.
[yawning]
I think I'll go get some fresh air
uh, cruise around town a little.
[door shuts]
Just like that, huh?
Just like what, mother?
He's gone out to cruise around.
So what?
A husband's place is home
beside his wife, when she's expecting
not cruising around who-knows-where
with who-knows-who. That's what.
Mother, Fred's been very nice to you
and all you do is pick on him.
I don't wish to hear anymore.
Well, if you haven't the gumption
to tell that husband of yours off, I have.
Deserting her to have a good time.
I'll straighten him out.
Psst. Hey, Barney, come on outside a minute.
I got somethin' to show you.
Here I am, Fred.
- Hey, uh, where are ya? - Taxi, mister?
- Is that you, Fred? - It's me, Mac.
Fred Flintstone's Taxi Service.
Wowie, Fred. That disguise is terrific.
[chuckles]
Taxi's around the corner. I'm all set to roll.
Taxi, mister?
[laughs]
Well, good luck, Fred.
Taxi, mister?
[laughs]
[panting]
Boy, I'll never find that no-good Fred Flintstone on foot.
Oh, here comes a cab. Taxi. Taxi!
Wow, there's my first fare.
Uh-oh. It's Wilma's mother.
Well, her money is as good as anyone's.
Okay, lady. Watch your step.
Watch your own, you walrus.
Oh, boy, I like her.
I like my sweet, little, old mother-in-law.
- Where to, lady? - Hm, I'm not sure.
- Do you know a Fred Flintstone? - 'Sure, lady.'
'Everybody knows Fred Flintstones. Swell fella.'
I want you to drive me
to wherever he might be hanging out.
Oh, boy, she's asking to help pay for the baby's crib.
Well, lady, Fred Flintstone spends a lot of time
at the Water Buffalo Lodge.
And a lot of money, too, no doubt.
- Take me there. - Yes, ma'am.
And I know a bumpy road to it.
[rattling]
Slow down, you crazy walrus.
screech
Here you are. Loyal Order of Water Buffalo.
- I'll be right back. - Hurry it up, lady.
The meter keeps running.
[Fred chuckling]
'It's run up to $1.35 already.'
[chuckles] At this rate, my dear mother-in-law
may go all the way for the baby crib.
[chuckles]
Flintstone isn't there. Where else does he hang out?
Well, lady, uh, sometimes he shoots a game of pool.
- Take me to the pool parlor. - Yes, ma'am.
[rattling]
Aren't there any paved roads in this town?
This is a shortcut, lady.
'Here we are, lady. Bedrock Pool Parlor.'
Well, he's not here.
A good pool player like Flintstone
is bound to show up sooner or later.
You better wait.
Fred Flintstone, a good pool player?
Why, even I could beat that tub of lard.
Perhaps while we are waitin', you'd care to shoot a game?
With you?
[laughs]
Anybody who drives a cab the way you do
should be a push-over at this game.
[chuckles] Boy, is she askin' for it.
But just to make it interestin'
I'll play ya double or nothin' for what's on the meter.
Just as you say, lady!
[laughs]
Little does the old walrus know
I practically invented this game.
Most balls out of one rack, okay?
Okay, just as you say, lady.
'The customer is always right.'
I, uh, call that my, uh, follow-the-leader shot.
And I call it luck, fur-face.
That's, uh, $6.84 you owe me now.
I know, I know. Come on, let's get going.
I've still got to find that no-good son-in-law of mine.
Yeah, another place Mr. Flintstone goes
is the bowlin' alley.
- 'Drive me there.' - Okay, lady.
[rattling]
Bedrock Bowl, lady.
When I find that son-in-law of mine
he'll wish he'd stayed home.
Keep going, little meter.
ting
'When dear mother-in-law sees the cab fare'
she'll wish she'd stayed home.
[laughs]
- Any luck, lady? - No, he isn't here.
Well, that's odd, he's such a good bowler.
Good bowler? Bowling's my game.
I could beat that flat-footed Flintstone any time.
You couldn't even beat me, lady.
'Oh, yeah?'
'I'll play a game for double or nothin' on the meter.'
Well, I don't know.
Come on. Come on, I owe you $10.36 now.
You have to give me a chance to get even.
Well, okay.
I like it best when they beg for it.
[chuckles]
One more strike and my score is 260.
Ya-hoo!
A 260!
You'll wish you'd never taken that cab out tonight.
You need four strikes to beat me, fur-face
and you know you can't do that.
crash
Oh, no!
Well, that was just luck.
You'll-you'll never get three more strikes.
crash
crash
crash
I never saw such luck.
Jinx, jinx. Hoo-hoo, jinx. No more strikes.
'It worked. It worked!'
'The ball's going in the other alley.'
[Fred laughs]
Four strikes.
Oh, no!
[thud]
Where to now, lady?
Home. I've had it.
You know, lady, a fine fellow like your son-in-law
would probably be at the library
'readin' up on how to be a good father.'
Oh, yeah?
How stupid can this stupid cab driver be?
Yeah, in fact I'll bet you to $12.50 on the meter
that Flintstone's at the library.
It's a bet. I got you this time, fuzz-face.
[rattling]
Oh, no, not with the bumps again.
Public library, lady.
Oh, this is the easiest bet I ever won.
[laughs] Fred Flintstone in a library.
That's a laugh. Ha-ha.
You look over there, lady, and I'll look on this side.
Okay, but don't strain yourself lookin'.
'Flintstone still doesn't even know his alphabet.'
Now we get over to the reading room.
[chuckles]
I don't see Flintstone anywhere
but even though it's ridiculous
I'll check the reading room.
Oh, no!
Mother-in-law dear, what are you doin' here?
I'm reading up on how to be a good father.
Just like the cab driver said.
It's unbelievable, but true.
I've had Fred all wrong.
To think it cost me $25
to find out Fred was in the library.
He was in there, lady. You owe me 25 bucks.
I know. I know.
Fred, you mean you made the 25 bucks in one night?
Correct, Barney.
That's why I'm through with the disguise.
Gee, how'd you make so much, Fred?
Well, you might say
I caught me a nice, fat pigeon, Barney.
[chuckles]
A nice, fat pigeon?
Isn't it wonderful, Wilma
how Fred and your mother have made up?
I'll say, Betty.
Last night mother came home and said
she had Fred all wrong for years
that Fred is really a wonderful man.
Mm. Look at them out there.
'Real chums.'
(Wilma) 'Oh, it's the nicest thing that ever happened.'
'I'm so happy I could cry.'
So you see, mother-in-law dear
how wrong you were about me all these years?
Yes. And I'm so sorry I misjudged you, son.
Psst. Hey, Fred, I'm gonna take the taxi tonight.
Maybe with this disguise
I'll catch a fat pigeon with 25 bucks
like you did last night.
Fat pigeon, eh?
bang
Wilma, look, they're at it again.
Oh, no!
I'll fat-pigeon you..
crash
Why don't you go home
where you belong?
[thud]
Betty, it slowly dawns on me
that those two are happiest when they're fighting.
I'll go home when I'm ready.
- The sooner the better! - I'll lower my broom on you.
Ow! Okay, cut it out!
[groaning]
[theme song]
? Flintstones meet the Flintstones ?
? They're the modern Stone Age family ?
? From the town of Bedrock ?
? They're a page right out of history ?
? Someday maybe Fred will win the fight ?
? Then that cat will stay out for the night ?
? When you're with the Flintstones ?
? Have a yabba-dabba-doo time ?
? A dabba-doo time ?
? We'll have a gay old time ?
thud
thud
? We'll have a gay old time ??
Wilma!
[banging on door]
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