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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:55,955 --> 00:00:58,219 Attention-- 2 00:00:58,291 --> 00:01:01,749 Camp North Star senior staff... 3 00:01:01,828 --> 00:01:03,523 counselors... 4 00:01:03,596 --> 00:01:05,257 and counselors-in-training... 5 00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:10,967 please rise for our nationaI anthem. 6 00:01:43,403 --> 00:01:45,894 How about that anthem, huh? 7 00:01:45,972 --> 00:01:49,135 I don't know about you, but I just get a great, big lump in my throat... 8 00:01:49,209 --> 00:01:51,143 every time I hear it. 9 00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:55,375 lt's 7:05 in the a.m. and... 10 00:01:56,282 --> 00:01:59,046 it's, wow, 43 degrees... 11 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:02,213 on the old Camp North Star weather dial. 12 00:02:02,288 --> 00:02:05,485 That is kind of nippy for a June 25, isn't it? 13 00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:07,892 I'm Tripper Harrison-- 14 00:02:10,163 --> 00:02:12,358 I'm your head counselor... 15 00:02:12,432 --> 00:02:14,366 and this is my wake-up show. 16 00:02:14,434 --> 00:02:17,460 I'll be coming at you every morning about this time... 17 00:02:17,537 --> 00:02:19,971 hoping to make your summer camp experience... 18 00:02:20,039 --> 00:02:22,064 the best available... 19 00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,905 in this price range. 20 00:02:25,378 --> 00:02:28,142 Of course, across the lake... 21 00:02:28,214 --> 00:02:29,806 over at Camp Mohawk... 22 00:02:31,050 --> 00:02:33,848 they won't be getting up for another hour or so. 23 00:02:33,920 --> 00:02:37,356 And when they do, they'll be awakened by servants bearing croissants... 24 00:02:37,423 --> 00:02:38,947 and cafe-au-lait. 25 00:02:39,025 --> 00:02:41,118 Whoops, I hope I didn't hit anybody. 26 00:02:41,194 --> 00:02:43,628 But here at Camp North Star this morning we're gonna be having... 27 00:02:43,696 --> 00:02:45,664 a delicious gruel breakfast. 28 00:02:45,732 --> 00:02:48,428 And don't forget to ask for seconds because... 29 00:02:48,501 --> 00:02:51,163 it's all the gruel you can eat. 30 00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:54,272 Are you ready for the summer 31 00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:58,310 Are you ready for the good times 32 00:02:58,378 --> 00:03:01,973 Are you ready for the birds and bees the apple trees 33 00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:04,312 And a whole lotta foolln' around 34 00:03:07,754 --> 00:03:09,813 Are you ready for the hot nights 35 00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:14,554 Are you ready for the fireflles the moonlit skies 36 00:03:14,627 --> 00:03:16,891 And a whole lotta foolin' around 37 00:03:18,131 --> 00:03:21,066 No more pencils, no more books 38 00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:24,228 No more teachers' dirty looks 39 00:03:24,304 --> 00:03:27,239 No more math and history 40 00:03:27,307 --> 00:03:30,071 Summertime has set us free 41 00:03:37,483 --> 00:03:40,748 Are you ready for the all-day fun in the sun 42 00:03:40,820 --> 00:03:43,653 'Cause the summer is ready for you 43 00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:14,212 Okay, everybody, I'm waiting. People, settle down. 44 00:04:21,327 --> 00:04:23,295 Okay, that's better. 45 00:04:23,363 --> 00:04:26,457 There's a lot of new people this year, so before I go any further... 46 00:04:26,532 --> 00:04:28,124 I want to introduce myself. 47 00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:31,193 - My name's Morty Melnick. - Hi, Mickey! 48 00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:34,297 The name is Morty, not Mickey. 49 00:04:34,374 --> 00:04:37,741 The buses are leaving tomorrow morning at 6:30 to pick up the kids. 50 00:04:37,810 --> 00:04:40,074 lt's important you get your bus assignments... 51 00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:41,841 to know which kids you're in charge of. 52 00:04:48,921 --> 00:04:50,786 Don't argue with me, Bradley. 53 00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:53,553 You can get rabies from a raccoon too. 54 00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:55,389 - Tell him, Maury. - That's right. 55 00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:58,089 Don't forget to put paper on the toilet seat covers... 56 00:04:58,164 --> 00:04:59,893 'cause you can get a terrible infection-- 57 00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:02,230 I meant to ask you, did you bring smokes? 58 00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:04,133 No, I couldn't. I forgot. 59 00:05:04,203 --> 00:05:07,229 My mom found the carton in my suitcase. She had a shit-fit. 60 00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,400 - Why don't we get some. - Yeah. 61 00:05:09,475 --> 00:05:11,568 Mommy. Mommy. 62 00:05:11,644 --> 00:05:13,305 Where's my mommy? 63 00:05:13,379 --> 00:05:16,815 Tripper, I'm looking forward to some action this summer. 64 00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:19,317 I hope you and your gentlemen can supply it for me. 65 00:05:19,385 --> 00:05:23,151 I could supply you, but the guy you gotta watch out for is Spaz. 66 00:05:23,222 --> 00:05:25,850 - Spaz? - He's a sex machine. 67 00:05:26,859 --> 00:05:28,690 Are you kidding me? 68 00:05:28,761 --> 00:05:31,355 He couldn't wake me up with a trumpet and a drum. 69 00:05:31,431 --> 00:05:35,527 Well, I went out with him one night, and he got us six nurses by himself... 70 00:05:35,601 --> 00:05:38,229 and four of them couldn't report to work the next morning. 71 00:05:43,443 --> 00:05:45,035 You gonna be okay? 72 00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:49,379 Hey, I'll see you at the end of the summer, okay? 73 00:06:02,528 --> 00:06:05,122 This bus does not have a safety inspection sticker. 74 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:09,032 - It's a fine old bus. - No, it's not! It is a piece of junk. 75 00:06:09,102 --> 00:06:11,536 I'm gonna tell my father, and he's gonna report you... 76 00:06:11,604 --> 00:06:14,038 - to the Department of Motor Vehicles... - Roxanne! 77 00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:16,905 and you're going to jail, behind bars. 78 00:06:17,977 --> 00:06:20,445 Just like last year, we'll hate it. 79 00:06:20,513 --> 00:06:23,448 Camp is lousy, and you're a dork. 80 00:06:23,516 --> 00:06:26,076 You're right. You sure are one. 81 00:06:26,152 --> 00:06:27,585 - Hiya. - Come on. 82 00:06:27,653 --> 00:06:29,587 - What do you want? - Are you having trouble? 83 00:06:29,655 --> 00:06:33,523 - I can't get these kids on the bus! - That's because I'm not goin'! 84 00:06:33,593 --> 00:06:36,926 Come here. I wanna have a word with you, all right? 85 00:06:36,996 --> 00:06:40,363 - You guys, you better get on the bus. - Why? 86 00:06:40,433 --> 00:06:43,891 If you don't, I'm gonna beat the pants off of ya! 87 00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:45,403 Not bad, huh? 88 00:07:01,721 --> 00:07:04,485 - Watch it. That stuff's expensive. - Very good, sir. 89 00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:11,696 Hey, Spaz. How you doin', buddy? 90 00:07:13,166 --> 00:07:15,361 - Good to see ya. - Give that back. 91 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:18,427 - We're doin' you a favor. - Give it back! 92 00:07:18,504 --> 00:07:20,267 Wanna make us, Spaz? 93 00:07:23,109 --> 00:07:24,542 Yeah. 94 00:07:24,610 --> 00:07:28,512 - Give him back the milkshake. - All right. Here you go. 95 00:07:33,820 --> 00:07:36,812 Hey, we'll see you at the basketball game, Spaz. 96 00:07:39,659 --> 00:07:41,456 Mohawk jerks. 97 00:07:41,527 --> 00:07:45,224 These children are going to the most glamorous of all summer camps... 98 00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:46,560 Camp Mohawk. 99 00:07:46,632 --> 00:07:48,395 There's a two-year waiting list... 100 00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,959 and every child has to be voted in. 101 00:07:51,037 --> 00:07:54,973 On top of all that, it costs $1,000 a week to go to Camp Mohawk. 102 00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:58,306 The question is: Is it worth $1,000 a week? 103 00:07:58,377 --> 00:08:01,369 It sure is. It's the best darned camp there is. 104 00:08:01,447 --> 00:08:03,711 Well, are you connected with Camp Mohawk? 105 00:08:03,783 --> 00:08:06,650 I think so. I'm the program director, Jerry Aldini. 106 00:08:06,719 --> 00:08:09,517 Well, how do you justify $1,000 a week? 107 00:08:09,589 --> 00:08:11,352 We have some special programs. 108 00:08:11,424 --> 00:08:14,018 We're doing ''Shakespeare in the Round'' again this year. 109 00:08:14,093 --> 00:08:16,755 Our polltical round table. Henry Kissinger will appear. 110 00:08:16,829 --> 00:08:20,390 Yasir 'Arafat is gonna come out, spend a weekend with the kids, rap with 'em. 111 00:08:20,466 --> 00:08:22,229 That's amazing! 112 00:08:22,301 --> 00:08:25,236 The kids wanted animals, so this year each camper will stalk and kill... 113 00:08:25,304 --> 00:08:27,636 his own bear in our private wildlife preserve. 114 00:08:27,707 --> 00:08:30,267 Are you sure the children can hack that? 115 00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:33,938 We'll see. The real excitement is gonna come at the end of the summer... 116 00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:35,674 during Sexual Awareness Week. 117 00:08:35,748 --> 00:08:38,308 We import 200 hookers from around the world, and each camper... 118 00:08:38,384 --> 00:08:42,218 armed with only a thermos of coffee and $2,000 cash... 119 00:08:42,288 --> 00:08:44,449 tries to visit as many countries as he can. 120 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:47,186 The winner, of course, is named King of Sexual Awareness Week... 121 00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:50,559 and is allowed to rape and pillage the neighboring towns until camp ends. 122 00:08:50,630 --> 00:08:52,063 That's incredible! 123 00:08:52,131 --> 00:08:55,897 What do you expect for $1,000 a week? Hey, you have a good summer. 124 00:09:35,841 --> 00:09:40,278 You must be the short, depressed kid we ordered. Glad you made it. 125 00:09:42,281 --> 00:09:43,873 Want half of this? 126 00:09:51,958 --> 00:09:55,553 Come on inside, Frankenstein. I'll buy you a cocktail. 127 00:09:55,628 --> 00:10:00,156 All the 12-year-old girls here finally? It's gonna be a terrific year. 128 00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:02,931 This ground is too slippery. 129 00:10:03,002 --> 00:10:06,563 I could fall and get whiplash or a broken neck, a serious injury. 130 00:10:06,639 --> 00:10:09,130 - A guy could die from that. - Phil, he's all yours. 131 00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:10,971 Thanks, Tripper. Are you Rudy Gerner? 132 00:10:11,043 --> 00:10:12,442 I'm Phil. 133 00:10:12,511 --> 00:10:14,308 - Gotta get this-- - Hi, Morty. 134 00:10:14,380 --> 00:10:17,406 - Hi, Trip. You got the rules? - No. I'm lookin' for them. 135 00:10:17,483 --> 00:10:19,644 Here they go. Very important. 136 00:10:19,719 --> 00:10:22,984 All your CIT's have gotta know those inside-out, backwards, whatever. 137 00:10:23,055 --> 00:10:25,455 Post 'em up, make sure they know 'em. 138 00:10:29,929 --> 00:10:31,191 Hey, Larry. 139 00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:35,900 What? 140 00:10:35,968 --> 00:10:38,869 - I think that chick is staring at me. - Which chick? Where? 141 00:10:38,938 --> 00:10:40,200 Over there. 142 00:10:42,208 --> 00:10:44,438 Hey, she is starin' at ya. 143 00:10:44,510 --> 00:10:47,877 You better go talk to her. She probably wants it. 144 00:10:56,255 --> 00:10:58,018 What's cookin', good-lookin'? 145 00:10:58,090 --> 00:10:59,853 Your fly's undone. 146 00:11:05,598 --> 00:11:07,122 Come on. 147 00:11:08,534 --> 00:11:11,298 Hey, Fink, come on. Off your knees. 148 00:11:11,370 --> 00:11:14,897 Spaz, I was watching you. Looked like you had a chance there for a second. 149 00:11:14,974 --> 00:11:16,566 Thanks, Trip. 150 00:11:18,210 --> 00:11:21,202 - My man, my main man. - Hey, Tripper. 151 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,145 Eyes right, gentlemen. 152 00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:31,350 All right, now. Just right, left, right, left. 153 00:11:31,424 --> 00:11:32,857 All right. 154 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:38,387 These are the camp rules. Morty would like you to look at these. 155 00:11:38,464 --> 00:11:41,399 They'll be in here if you want to check these out later. 156 00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:43,458 And now, gentlemen-- and you are-- 157 00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:46,767 I'll take you to your cabin assignments for the first week. Let's go! 158 00:11:47,940 --> 00:11:50,636 This is the six-year-olds' cabin. 159 00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:53,645 All they know how to do is eat and wet their beds. 160 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:56,705 You guys will teach them everything else. Crockett, take it. 161 00:11:56,782 --> 00:12:00,149 I don't want it. No six-year-olds. Aw, come on, Trip. 162 00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:02,210 My man. Good luck. 163 00:12:02,288 --> 00:12:05,223 Put the comic book away and get your shirt. 164 00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:07,418 Take the shirt by the shoulders. 165 00:12:07,493 --> 00:12:09,723 One fold sleevie... 166 00:12:09,795 --> 00:12:11,660 two fold sleevie. 167 00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,564 - Presto! lt's done. - How's this, Mike? 168 00:12:14,633 --> 00:12:18,399 That's not bad. Why don't we have a nap and come back later and try it. 169 00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:20,336 - No. Forget it. - Come on. 170 00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:24,240 Do I have to count to three? One, two-- 171 00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:26,505 Two's good enough. Come on, Steve. 172 00:12:33,686 --> 00:12:34,948 What's that? 173 00:12:36,288 --> 00:12:38,882 It's Ernie, my pet frog. He's a jumper. 174 00:12:39,959 --> 00:12:43,224 - How come he doesn't hop? - He's tired, I guess. 175 00:12:43,295 --> 00:12:45,957 - No, he's dead. - No, he's sleeping. 176 00:12:46,031 --> 00:12:48,499 For sure he's dead. 177 00:12:49,135 --> 00:12:51,797 Mister, could you help me wake up my frog? 178 00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,400 He looks tired. 179 00:12:55,474 --> 00:12:58,341 Why don't we let him sleep a llttle longer. 180 00:12:58,410 --> 00:13:00,310 You take that nap now... 181 00:13:00,379 --> 00:13:03,109 and I'll take care of the frog. 182 00:13:05,117 --> 00:13:07,051 This is the 14-year-old girls' cabin. 183 00:13:07,119 --> 00:13:10,111 They've got the drive and the equipment, but they don't have the experience. 184 00:13:10,189 --> 00:13:13,454 They better not get it from you guys. Not this summer, anyway. 185 00:13:13,526 --> 00:13:15,153 Roxanne! 186 00:13:15,227 --> 00:13:17,661 Just the person I wanted to see. 187 00:13:17,730 --> 00:13:19,823 Later, Tripper. Say, Christmas? 188 00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:22,925 A.L., that's your cabin. 189 00:13:23,002 --> 00:13:25,027 You got the jailbait. Watch 'em. 190 00:13:25,104 --> 00:13:26,366 - Women. - Thanks. 191 00:13:27,573 --> 00:13:31,600 - See you later. - I want you to know I'm deeply hurt. 192 00:13:31,677 --> 00:13:33,440 I mean that sincerely. 193 00:13:33,512 --> 00:13:36,106 Glad to hear it. Excuse me. 194 00:13:42,188 --> 00:13:44,179 Hi, Hardware. 195 00:13:44,256 --> 00:13:46,520 - Hi, Larry. - Hi, Finkle. Hi, Hard. 196 00:13:57,169 --> 00:14:00,969 Hey, guess what, guys. liza finally got her period. 197 00:14:01,774 --> 00:14:05,073 - You don't have to advertise it. - They gotta know. 198 00:14:05,144 --> 00:14:08,511 You better watch it, 'cause now you can get pregnant. 199 00:14:08,581 --> 00:14:12,210 I heard about this girl. She got pregnant without doing it with anyone. 200 00:14:12,284 --> 00:14:15,481 What do you mean? You can't get pregnant without doing it. 201 00:14:15,554 --> 00:14:18,387 No, stupid. She didn't do it. She almost did it. 202 00:14:18,457 --> 00:14:20,357 Oh, my God. 203 00:14:20,426 --> 00:14:23,554 Hi, guys. I got your cabin this week. 204 00:14:23,629 --> 00:14:25,563 Go on. Ask A.L. 205 00:14:26,632 --> 00:14:28,065 Ask me what? 206 00:14:28,133 --> 00:14:30,693 Can a girl get pregnant if she almost does it with a guy? 207 00:14:30,769 --> 00:14:32,293 Almost? 208 00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:34,566 I don't think so. No. 209 00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,073 That's a relief. 210 00:14:38,410 --> 00:14:42,039 Spaz-alapolls, you're in here with Phil and the 12-year-olds. 211 00:14:42,114 --> 00:14:44,810 - This here is Rudy. - Rudy, how's it goin'? 212 00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:48,115 Watch out for this guy. He's done time for car theft. 213 00:14:48,187 --> 00:14:49,620 My kind of guy. 214 00:14:49,688 --> 00:14:53,522 You could be a bad influence on the other children. Watch it. 215 00:14:53,592 --> 00:14:56,686 We'll see you guys at dinner. Watch out for the ear, Rudy! 216 00:14:56,762 --> 00:14:58,354 - See you later, Spaz. - Bye-bye. 217 00:15:02,835 --> 00:15:06,100 Hi, guys. I'm Spaz. I'm your CIT this week. 218 00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:12,373 I want to introduce you to a new guy-- 219 00:15:12,444 --> 00:15:15,880 Hey, bozo, this is my bunk, so shove off. 220 00:15:19,018 --> 00:15:22,385 Settle down! Come on, guys. Settle down. 221 00:15:23,489 --> 00:15:26,014 Let's see. Everything's put away. That's good. 222 00:15:26,091 --> 00:15:28,252 Everybody has a bunk. That's good. 223 00:15:28,327 --> 00:15:30,352 Everybody's settled in. That's good. 224 00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:33,421 Everybody's been deloused and fingerprinted. That's good. 225 00:15:33,499 --> 00:15:37,299 Phil, look. lt's the first day of camp, and we're bored already. 226 00:15:37,369 --> 00:15:39,200 What are we gonna do? 227 00:15:39,271 --> 00:15:41,136 Relax, Peter. Relax. 228 00:15:41,206 --> 00:15:45,074 Okay, guys, after lunch we got a big game with Cabin B-11. 229 00:15:45,144 --> 00:15:48,307 And I really want to win it, okay? So what do you say? 230 00:15:48,380 --> 00:15:49,972 - We're gonna kill 'em! - What? 231 00:15:51,050 --> 00:15:52,142 I can't hear you. 232 00:15:56,055 --> 00:15:59,752 Attention, all campers. Afternoon swim schedule is as follows: 233 00:15:59,825 --> 00:16:03,454 Advanced Dolphins, report to the dock for survival swimming and IQ testing. 234 00:16:03,529 --> 00:16:06,657 All Senior Silverfish, meet on the beach for nude sunbathing. 235 00:16:06,732 --> 00:16:10,224 Junior Salmon, Trout and Herring, report to the nearest dellcatessen. 236 00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:12,827 Six-year-old Tadpoles, report to the swamp. 237 00:16:12,905 --> 00:16:15,965 And all Lobsters, get outta here! You're a menace! 238 00:16:32,458 --> 00:16:35,393 - David says it's very important-- - Hi, girls. 239 00:16:35,461 --> 00:16:38,897 I'm really looking forward to working with all of you this summer. 240 00:16:38,964 --> 00:16:40,989 I just hope there's enough of me to go around. 241 00:16:41,066 --> 00:16:43,466 Lance, please! We're eating! 242 00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:55,813 Aw, crap! 243 00:16:55,881 --> 00:16:58,645 Do I have to stack the dishes again? 244 00:16:58,717 --> 00:17:01,845 I don't have the energy. I'm weak from hunger. 245 00:17:02,955 --> 00:17:04,547 Less flap, more stack. 246 00:17:04,623 --> 00:17:07,558 Gossip! Gossip! We want gossip! 247 00:17:28,447 --> 00:17:31,712 We have a gossip update. This is the news. 248 00:17:31,784 --> 00:17:35,880 It seems as though last summer's hottest couple have split. 249 00:17:35,954 --> 00:17:39,754 I can't tell you their names, but her initials are A.L... 250 00:17:39,825 --> 00:17:41,952 and he's the hottest CIT on wheels. 251 00:17:43,362 --> 00:17:46,422 We all know they spent most of last summer in the bushes. 252 00:17:46,498 --> 00:17:49,524 The question is: Will true love bloom again? 253 00:17:49,601 --> 00:17:53,128 And speaking of ClT's, there's a certain girl named Wendy... 254 00:17:53,205 --> 00:17:56,538 who's giving all the guys wet dreams. 255 00:18:00,879 --> 00:18:02,813 Okay, Jody. Thank you very much. 256 00:18:02,881 --> 00:18:06,408 Everybody, when you've finished, all the cabins can go to their other activities. 257 00:18:09,188 --> 00:18:12,282 - I'll see you in a bit. - Guys, let's play ball. 258 00:18:12,357 --> 00:18:13,688 All right! 259 00:18:15,194 --> 00:18:18,129 Let's move. We gotta get back to the cabin for a rest period. 260 00:18:18,197 --> 00:18:20,791 If I wanted to rest, I would've stayed in Cleveland. 261 00:18:20,866 --> 00:18:22,800 You and Trip are playing defense. 262 00:18:22,868 --> 00:18:26,964 - We're defense, buddy! - Guys, let's go. We can win this game! 263 00:18:27,039 --> 00:18:29,132 Hardware, you're doomed. 264 00:18:29,208 --> 00:18:31,369 Louder, louder 265 00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:38,609 Come on! Come on, people! 266 00:18:42,488 --> 00:18:43,512 Let's kill 'em! 267 00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:49,650 Rudy, get it back the other way! 268 00:18:57,236 --> 00:19:00,672 Do we have to have this guy on our team? 269 00:19:00,739 --> 00:19:03,003 - He's totally useless. - He sucks! 270 00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:05,305 I know. Come on. Let's regroup. 271 00:19:38,010 --> 00:19:40,001 Can I have some fries, please? 272 00:19:48,954 --> 00:19:51,388 Gerner! How's it going? 273 00:19:54,226 --> 00:19:57,889 This is the best damn food in the whole Two Pines area. 274 00:19:57,963 --> 00:20:00,227 Not surprised you found this place. 275 00:20:00,299 --> 00:20:03,996 I had you pegged for a gourmet first time I met you. 276 00:20:04,069 --> 00:20:07,061 You know, that's a smart move, bringing a suitcase. 277 00:20:07,139 --> 00:20:10,074 You don't want to be leaving valuable socks and underwear around camp... 278 00:20:10,142 --> 00:20:13,009 where people can rustle around in 'em when you're out on the town. 279 00:20:13,078 --> 00:20:14,909 Thank you. 280 00:20:14,980 --> 00:20:16,572 You like ketchup? 281 00:20:18,317 --> 00:20:20,410 I'm going away. 282 00:20:20,485 --> 00:20:22,248 You goin' to Vegas? 283 00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:25,813 lf you're going to Vegas, I would be up for it because I love that town. 284 00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:28,724 I'm a party guy. I love that town. 285 00:20:28,794 --> 00:20:30,762 I don't think they want me around. 286 00:20:30,829 --> 00:20:34,094 You talkin' about the soccer heads back there? 287 00:20:34,166 --> 00:20:36,600 Well, that's llfe in the fast-paced... 288 00:20:36,668 --> 00:20:40,263 slam-bang, llve-on-the-razor's-edge, laugh-in-the-face-of-death... 289 00:20:40,339 --> 00:20:42,432 world of junior league soccer. 290 00:20:42,507 --> 00:20:45,567 I never played the game before. I tried to tell 'em. 291 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:50,079 What? You tried to tell-- 292 00:20:50,148 --> 00:20:51,479 And they-- 293 00:20:51,550 --> 00:20:53,347 Who was it? 294 00:20:53,418 --> 00:20:57,377 I'll get 'em. I'll get 'em with this Swiss Army knife. 295 00:20:57,456 --> 00:20:59,617 The Swiss trained me to kill, and I will do it. 296 00:20:59,691 --> 00:21:02,626 I will grab these guys by the neck, take the toothpick... 297 00:21:02,694 --> 00:21:05,026 and stick it right in between their teeth. 298 00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:07,361 Then I'll slap them around the head a couple of times. 299 00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:11,061 They'll go out for a couple of seconds. I'll go for the corkscrew. 300 00:21:11,136 --> 00:21:13,627 I'll grab 'em and take that corkscrew... 301 00:21:13,705 --> 00:21:15,969 and I will stick it right into their voice box. 302 00:21:16,041 --> 00:21:17,804 I will twist that mofo. 303 00:21:17,876 --> 00:21:20,868 I will twist it into his voice box and rip it out. 304 00:21:20,946 --> 00:21:23,813 He'll talk like this for the rest of his llfe. 305 00:21:23,882 --> 00:21:28,182 I don't want to hurt anyone. I just want them to like me. 306 00:21:29,688 --> 00:21:31,451 Why? 307 00:21:31,523 --> 00:21:34,686 You make one good friend a summer... 308 00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:36,751 and you're doing pretty well. 309 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:45,793 Look, if you have trouble, come to me, tell me, and I'll help you. 310 00:21:49,841 --> 00:21:51,433 What is that? 311 00:21:51,510 --> 00:21:53,671 Is that yes or no? Yes is like this... 312 00:21:53,745 --> 00:21:56,213 and no is just twisting, twisting, twisting, okay? 313 00:21:56,281 --> 00:21:58,215 - It was yes. - This one? Definitely. 314 00:21:58,283 --> 00:22:01,218 - Yes, one of those. - It wasn't a side-to-side one? 315 00:22:01,286 --> 00:22:04,119 You can hurt your neck doing that. 316 00:22:04,189 --> 00:22:07,283 Have you got wheels, 'cause I need a lift back to camp? 317 00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:10,294 My folks won't let me drive 'cause they caught me drinkin'. 318 00:22:10,362 --> 00:22:13,297 They don't let me out of the house anymore 'cause I'm a jerk. 319 00:22:13,365 --> 00:22:15,959 They're gonna send me to milltary school. 320 00:22:17,035 --> 00:22:19,299 You forgot something. 321 00:22:19,371 --> 00:22:21,999 Thanks for the fries. 322 00:22:34,786 --> 00:22:36,378 Jesus! 323 00:22:37,589 --> 00:22:39,921 - Christ, Hardware. - What're you doing? 324 00:22:39,991 --> 00:22:43,552 Why don't you warn me when you're gonna play with your dynamite? 325 00:22:47,065 --> 00:22:48,896 What are you doing, Hardware? 326 00:22:48,967 --> 00:22:52,630 I'm hooking up this heavy duty outlet for our new air conditioner. 327 00:22:52,704 --> 00:22:54,968 An air conditioner? That's great! 328 00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:57,668 - Where is it? - Morty's office. 329 00:22:57,743 --> 00:22:59,768 He loves the heat. 330 00:23:03,148 --> 00:23:06,413 An air conditioner just doesn't get up and walk away. 331 00:23:06,485 --> 00:23:08,817 Any idea where it might be, Tripper? 332 00:23:08,887 --> 00:23:10,821 I have no idea. 333 00:23:10,889 --> 00:23:12,880 Maybe it was stolen, Morty. 334 00:23:12,958 --> 00:23:15,153 Of course it was stolen... 335 00:23:15,227 --> 00:23:16,922 but I'm gonna find it. 336 00:23:16,995 --> 00:23:19,930 Will you two go over the schedules, please? 337 00:23:21,066 --> 00:23:22,499 Ready? 338 00:23:24,403 --> 00:23:27,998 Monday, Wednesday and Friday, 2:00 to 4:00 p.m.: 339 00:23:28,073 --> 00:23:30,098 junior boys and junior girls. 340 00:23:31,743 --> 00:23:34,576 Tuesday and Thursday, 2:00 to 4:00 p.m.: 341 00:23:34,646 --> 00:23:36,511 junior boys. 342 00:23:36,581 --> 00:23:38,549 Thursday and Friday, 4:00 to 5:00-- 343 00:23:38,617 --> 00:23:40,346 - Roxanne. - What? 344 00:23:40,419 --> 00:23:42,819 I have to tell you this as a friend. 345 00:23:42,888 --> 00:23:46,153 I can see right down your blouse. 346 00:23:46,224 --> 00:23:48,283 I can see everything too. 347 00:23:48,360 --> 00:23:51,295 Tripper, is there something seriously wrong with you? 348 00:23:51,363 --> 00:23:54,958 Roxanne, I have what doctors call ''very active glands.'' 349 00:23:55,033 --> 00:23:57,627 You're the only person l've told. My folks don't even know. 350 00:23:57,702 --> 00:23:59,636 Maybe you can have surgery without them knowing. 351 00:24:00,872 --> 00:24:03,636 The heck with surgery! Let's wrestle. 352 00:24:03,708 --> 00:24:05,835 I know, let's not, okay, Tripper? 353 00:24:07,546 --> 00:24:09,411 The Atomic Skull Crusher! 354 00:24:10,816 --> 00:24:14,081 Let's not do this, okay? Let's just stop right now. 355 00:24:26,298 --> 00:24:29,062 - Shark-infested waters! - Don't do that one! 356 00:24:34,039 --> 00:24:35,472 Let's stop, okay? 357 00:24:37,409 --> 00:24:40,071 I'm sorry about that blouse thing, but somebody had to tell you. 358 00:24:40,145 --> 00:24:42,636 Get off me right now, or I start screaming. 359 00:24:42,714 --> 00:24:46,343 At the count of three, I guess, huh? One, two-- Help! 360 00:24:48,587 --> 00:24:50,555 Help me! Somebody! 361 00:24:50,622 --> 00:24:52,817 - Help! Get off me! - Tripper, get off. 362 00:24:53,592 --> 00:24:55,059 What the hell's goin' on? 363 00:24:59,264 --> 00:25:01,095 She attacked me! 364 00:25:01,166 --> 00:25:04,294 - Give me a break. - She came on to me like an animal. 365 00:25:11,276 --> 00:25:13,870 Would you get a hold of yourself! 366 00:25:18,884 --> 00:25:22,445 It's great! You can't even see it from outside because of the bushes. 367 00:25:22,521 --> 00:25:24,352 This is it. 368 00:25:24,422 --> 00:25:26,982 Now, in five seconds-- we're talkin' five-- 369 00:25:27,058 --> 00:25:29,492 we are gonna have the coolest cabin in camp. 370 00:25:29,561 --> 00:25:31,392 All right! 371 00:25:31,463 --> 00:25:33,556 - Yes! - Thank you, Mickey. 372 00:25:33,632 --> 00:25:35,896 All right. Let's do it. 373 00:25:35,967 --> 00:25:38,527 - Are you ready? Are you ready? - I'm ready. 374 00:25:38,603 --> 00:25:42,164 All right. Five, four, three... 375 00:25:43,041 --> 00:25:44,633 two, one. 376 00:25:44,709 --> 00:25:45,733 Do it! 377 00:25:51,983 --> 00:25:53,917 - Hardware? - Yeah, Crockett? 378 00:25:53,985 --> 00:25:55,418 You're a dick. 379 00:27:14,733 --> 00:27:16,325 Okay, pit stop. 380 00:27:16,401 --> 00:27:18,164 Change the tires. 381 00:27:27,512 --> 00:27:29,275 Not bad. 382 00:27:29,347 --> 00:27:32,339 You got pretty good form. lt's real good. 383 00:27:32,417 --> 00:27:33,679 Really? 384 00:27:34,519 --> 00:27:37,352 Yeah. You know, it's your first time out. 385 00:27:37,422 --> 00:27:39,014 It's okay. 386 00:27:39,090 --> 00:27:43,652 You want to get into shape, though, you gotta come out every morning with me. 387 00:27:43,728 --> 00:27:45,662 I'll make you into an animal. 388 00:27:48,099 --> 00:27:50,727 Top physical condition, you gotta pay the price. 389 00:27:58,610 --> 00:28:00,202 Attention, campers. 390 00:28:00,278 --> 00:28:03,839 Remember, this is killer bee season in the north woods. 391 00:28:03,915 --> 00:28:05,906 So don't provoke any flying yellow things. 392 00:28:05,984 --> 00:28:07,952 You're just asking for trouble. 393 00:28:16,995 --> 00:28:20,021 I told Candace I was gonna christen my boat ''The Candace''... 394 00:28:20,098 --> 00:28:22,999 and she just about had a heart attack. 395 00:28:23,068 --> 00:28:25,935 I don't think she knew how much in love we really were. 396 00:28:27,672 --> 00:28:31,108 - Crockett, can you help me a sec? - Sure, Candace. 397 00:28:32,277 --> 00:28:33,676 Hurry up. Come on. 398 00:28:39,784 --> 00:28:41,308 What are you doin'? 399 00:28:42,487 --> 00:28:45,923 This is the first time I've ever kidnapped a guy! 400 00:28:45,990 --> 00:28:48,458 - No kidding? - You'll be released unharmed! 401 00:28:49,427 --> 00:28:53,761 I just want you long enough to tell you that I'm really attracted to you. 402 00:28:53,832 --> 00:28:55,993 - Yeah? - Yeah! 403 00:28:56,067 --> 00:28:58,501 I think I'm special too. 404 00:28:58,570 --> 00:29:01,937 You're the only one in this camp I really want to spend time with. 405 00:29:02,006 --> 00:29:03,997 Really? Well, what about Lance Cashman? 406 00:29:04,075 --> 00:29:05,633 - Lance? - Yeah, Lance! 407 00:29:05,710 --> 00:29:08,611 Lance Cashman is a total jerk-off! 408 00:29:10,348 --> 00:29:11,679 All right! 409 00:29:11,750 --> 00:29:13,843 She likes me! She likes me! 410 00:29:16,054 --> 00:29:17,749 Jerk-off? 411 00:29:17,822 --> 00:29:19,449 I don't jerk off. 412 00:29:19,524 --> 00:29:23,119 - I don't know how to do this. - Just throw it up and hit it. 413 00:29:40,011 --> 00:29:41,672 I'm sorry. 414 00:29:41,746 --> 00:29:43,941 - Why don't we serve? - Yeah. 415 00:29:46,985 --> 00:29:50,477 Did you see the way she handed you the racket? She wants it. 416 00:29:51,689 --> 00:29:54,123 You guys ready? Here it comes. 417 00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:57,152 I got it. lt's mine! 418 00:29:57,228 --> 00:30:00,254 Get it! Get it! Come on! Lob it! 419 00:30:00,331 --> 00:30:02,424 I got it! I got it! 420 00:30:03,601 --> 00:30:06,263 I thought you said you had it, meatball! 421 00:30:06,337 --> 00:30:08,271 Why don't you serve, then? 422 00:30:11,576 --> 00:30:12,838 Ready? 423 00:30:16,247 --> 00:30:18,010 I got it! I got it! 424 00:30:21,953 --> 00:30:24,888 Attention. Here's an update on tonight's dinner. 425 00:30:24,956 --> 00:30:27,925 It was veal. I repeat, veal. 426 00:30:27,992 --> 00:30:31,189 The winner of tonight's mystery meat contest is Jeffrey Corbin... 427 00:30:31,262 --> 00:30:34,095 who guessed ''some kind of beef.'' 428 00:30:34,165 --> 00:30:37,601 Congratulations, Jeffrey. You just won a brand-new Chrysler Cordoba. 429 00:30:37,669 --> 00:30:40,695 You can pick it up at Morty's office. 430 00:30:42,941 --> 00:30:44,374 You bet. 431 00:30:45,677 --> 00:30:47,201 Five. 432 00:30:49,614 --> 00:30:51,445 I'll see that five. 433 00:30:53,885 --> 00:30:55,512 Want a card? 434 00:30:58,389 --> 00:31:00,550 I'll take one. Eight. 435 00:31:01,893 --> 00:31:03,326 Fifteen. 436 00:31:04,963 --> 00:31:07,158 Eighteen. I'll stick. 437 00:31:10,235 --> 00:31:10,894 Twenty. 438 00:31:15,974 --> 00:31:17,407 You shark! 439 00:31:17,475 --> 00:31:19,841 Playing some sort of system, aren't you? 440 00:31:19,911 --> 00:31:22,675 Been watchin' the cards, marking the cards. 441 00:31:29,921 --> 00:31:32,014 Burp. 442 00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:37,923 From the diaphragm. See? 443 00:31:41,232 --> 00:31:42,824 Really? 444 00:31:45,803 --> 00:31:47,395 From the diaphragm. 445 00:31:50,909 --> 00:31:52,934 That's not from the diaphragm. 446 00:31:53,011 --> 00:31:54,444 Ante up. 447 00:31:56,247 --> 00:31:59,683 - What do you do in the off season? - Go to school. 448 00:32:01,019 --> 00:32:02,418 Twenty. 449 00:32:05,690 --> 00:32:08,625 What are you, some sort of madman? 450 00:32:08,693 --> 00:32:11,890 Is that what they teach you in that school of yours? Twenty? 451 00:32:11,963 --> 00:32:13,726 I'll see your 20. 452 00:32:13,798 --> 00:32:16,892 I hope you walk outta here with nothin'. 453 00:32:18,236 --> 00:32:20,602 I think I like history the most. 454 00:32:20,672 --> 00:32:24,733 It's fun to imagine that I'm in some other time, in a different place. 455 00:32:24,809 --> 00:32:27,300 Shut up and look at your cards. 456 00:32:30,848 --> 00:32:32,110 Blackjack. 457 00:32:40,224 --> 00:32:41,782 Nineteen. 458 00:32:41,859 --> 00:32:43,451 Twenty-one. 459 00:32:45,263 --> 00:32:47,754 I've had it. That's it. 460 00:32:47,832 --> 00:32:49,925 Card monster. Get out! 461 00:32:54,172 --> 00:32:57,266 I think you're pretty tired. I think you ought to go home and sleep. 462 00:32:57,342 --> 00:32:58,832 This was great. 463 00:32:58,910 --> 00:33:01,344 You're the guy walkin' home with all the peanuts. 464 00:33:01,412 --> 00:33:04,575 If I were walking home with the peanuts, it'd be incredible, sensational! 465 00:33:06,317 --> 00:33:08,080 Are you going to bed? 466 00:33:08,152 --> 00:33:12,589 No. I've called an organizational meeting of the CIT's for a little later. 467 00:33:12,657 --> 00:33:14,488 No midgets allowed. Sorry. 468 00:33:16,394 --> 00:33:18,328 Enough of this playing for peanuts. 469 00:33:18,396 --> 00:33:21,490 Tomorrow night we play for real stakes-- zucchini. 470 00:33:23,267 --> 00:33:25,531 Children starving in lndia, and you're walking... 471 00:33:25,603 --> 00:33:28,003 around with a whole sombrero full of peanuts. 472 00:33:28,072 --> 00:33:29,903 I hope you sleep well. 473 00:33:31,642 --> 00:33:33,075 Good night, Tripper. 474 00:33:44,689 --> 00:33:47,055 Attention, all campers. 475 00:33:47,125 --> 00:33:49,889 It's now 9:30. 476 00:33:49,961 --> 00:33:51,553 And that's lights-out time... 477 00:33:51,629 --> 00:33:53,654 9:30, as you know. 478 00:33:53,731 --> 00:33:55,528 Tomorrow is parents day... 479 00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:58,194 and you must look rested, or Morty will be sent... 480 00:33:58,269 --> 00:34:00,032 to the state penitentiary. 481 00:34:12,083 --> 00:34:14,745 - What are you doin'? - Cut the light! 482 00:34:17,955 --> 00:34:20,321 - Come on. What, is it breakfast? - Hardware. 483 00:34:20,391 --> 00:34:22,655 Get up! Up! Up! 484 00:34:24,062 --> 00:34:25,723 Who's the puppy? 485 00:34:28,699 --> 00:34:30,030 What? 486 00:34:30,101 --> 00:34:32,899 All right, gentlemen. Big event. 487 00:34:33,871 --> 00:34:35,498 Operation Late Night Excitement. 488 00:34:35,573 --> 00:34:37,734 Another panty raid, Trip? 489 00:34:37,809 --> 00:34:40,573 No questions, dogface! 490 00:34:40,645 --> 00:34:43,136 Dress up and move out! 491 00:35:19,684 --> 00:35:21,276 All right. Now. 492 00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:32,854 Don't wake him. Tie him gently. He needs his sleep. 493 00:35:35,566 --> 00:35:37,830 Honor guard. 494 00:35:37,902 --> 00:35:39,836 Prepare to raise the casket. 495 00:35:54,152 --> 00:35:56,416 It won't fit, Trip. 496 00:35:56,487 --> 00:35:57,920 Spin him. 497 00:35:59,624 --> 00:36:01,319 All right. 498 00:36:11,869 --> 00:36:14,201 Company, rotate. 499 00:36:19,377 --> 00:36:21,072 Right face. 500 00:37:05,089 --> 00:37:06,989 Morning, Mr. Melnick! 501 00:37:07,058 --> 00:37:08,491 Hey, Mickey! 502 00:37:24,342 --> 00:37:26,435 Lots of room. Looks fine, Dad. 503 00:37:26,510 --> 00:37:28,535 Looks good, Dad. Come on. 504 00:37:28,613 --> 00:37:30,046 Looks fine, Dad. 505 00:37:33,284 --> 00:37:34,876 Sorry, Dad. 506 00:37:45,029 --> 00:37:48,055 You don't have to run with me today. I know you got things to do. 507 00:37:48,132 --> 00:37:51,295 I'd rather run. Takes my mind off sex. 508 00:37:52,370 --> 00:37:54,395 ls your dad coming up today? 509 00:37:54,472 --> 00:37:56,303 He can't. 510 00:37:56,374 --> 00:37:58,035 Mine can't, either. 511 00:37:58,109 --> 00:38:00,737 He's gotta mow the lawn. 512 00:38:00,811 --> 00:38:03,371 Mind hanging out with me today? 513 00:38:03,447 --> 00:38:04,880 No. 514 00:38:07,051 --> 00:38:09,485 If you let me 515 00:38:10,821 --> 00:38:15,417 I could be your good friend 516 00:38:15,493 --> 00:38:19,088 I know that if you let me 517 00:38:20,231 --> 00:38:23,928 We could walk together 518 00:38:24,001 --> 00:38:29,029 We're not so different, you know 519 00:38:29,106 --> 00:38:34,476 Though we may have different dreams 520 00:38:34,545 --> 00:38:38,242 - Say, got any kids in your family? - No. 521 00:38:38,316 --> 00:38:40,409 Did you ever do any time, prison? 522 00:38:42,086 --> 00:38:44,782 - You know how to hot-wire a car? - Not yet. 523 00:38:44,855 --> 00:38:46,447 You'll learn in class. 524 00:38:46,524 --> 00:38:49,015 Did you read in the paper today about the Polish terrorist? 525 00:38:49,093 --> 00:38:51,687 Tragedy. They sent this guy to blow up a car... 526 00:38:51,762 --> 00:38:54,128 and the guy burns his mouth on a tailpipe. 527 00:38:54,198 --> 00:38:56,291 That's an old one. You'll get that a lot up here. 528 00:38:56,367 --> 00:38:58,130 Rattlesnake! Look out! 529 00:39:13,351 --> 00:39:15,114 Shh! Quiet. Quiet. Shh! 530 00:39:21,759 --> 00:39:25,126 ''...her head from side to side against the dank jungle floor--'' 531 00:39:26,464 --> 00:39:27,829 Hey, relax. 532 00:39:27,898 --> 00:39:31,561 ''ln the distance the ocean undulated with increasing fervor.'' 533 00:39:31,635 --> 00:39:33,660 - I can hear them. - Yeah, yeah, yeah! 534 00:39:33,738 --> 00:39:35,933 This book is really disgusting. 535 00:39:36,006 --> 00:39:38,736 Well, it sounds great to me. 536 00:39:38,809 --> 00:39:40,834 I don't belleve it. 537 00:39:40,911 --> 00:39:42,902 ''She could no longer contain the plea.'' 538 00:39:42,980 --> 00:39:44,413 Oh, my God! 539 00:39:44,482 --> 00:39:47,576 Oh, you llttle hunk of honey bunch! 540 00:39:49,487 --> 00:39:50,749 Take me! 541 00:39:52,289 --> 00:39:53,586 Make me a woman. 542 00:39:53,657 --> 00:39:56,854 ''She realized she was uttering sounds from deep within herself... 543 00:39:56,927 --> 00:39:59,225 noises unlike any she had ever made before.'' 544 00:40:00,164 --> 00:40:02,428 Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! 545 00:40:05,035 --> 00:40:08,698 ''...the hungry personification of passion and pain. 546 00:40:08,773 --> 00:40:11,264 Closer and closer... 547 00:40:11,342 --> 00:40:15,745 the stranger came towards the entangled pair.'' 548 00:40:17,248 --> 00:40:18,681 - What? - Take me now! 549 00:40:18,749 --> 00:40:20,979 - I said I'm getting a boner! - Will you shush! 550 00:40:23,087 --> 00:40:25,783 Wait a minute. I think I hear something. 551 00:40:32,696 --> 00:40:34,891 I'll check it out. 552 00:40:34,965 --> 00:40:36,330 Quiet. 553 00:40:38,536 --> 00:40:39,969 They can hear us. 554 00:40:44,442 --> 00:40:46,967 I don't hear anything. 555 00:40:47,044 --> 00:40:50,571 - I'm gettin' outta here. - I bet they heard us. Get out of here. 556 00:40:50,648 --> 00:40:52,582 Go on. Get out. 557 00:40:52,650 --> 00:40:55,118 Spaz, I'm stuck. I'm having trouble. 558 00:40:55,186 --> 00:40:57,017 Come on. Spaz, help me. 559 00:40:57,087 --> 00:40:58,679 I'm having trouble! 560 00:40:58,756 --> 00:41:00,485 Spaz, what are you doing? 561 00:41:01,559 --> 00:41:03,652 Spaz, you're rippin' my face off! 562 00:41:06,163 --> 00:41:07,824 Let me outta here. 563 00:41:08,899 --> 00:41:10,196 What are you doing? 564 00:41:19,076 --> 00:41:20,873 What, are you a homo or what? 565 00:41:28,786 --> 00:41:32,688 Attention. Bus for the Camp Mohawk basketball game leaving in 15 minutes. 566 00:41:32,756 --> 00:41:37,420 And there is a very fat pair of pants hanging on the flagpole this morning. 567 00:41:47,505 --> 00:41:49,666 See you at Camp Mohawk, Morty! 568 00:42:04,455 --> 00:42:07,117 Okay, guys! One, two, three! 569 00:42:07,191 --> 00:42:08,681 Camp Mohawk! 570 00:42:08,759 --> 00:42:10,727 Death, injury, blood and pain! 571 00:42:10,794 --> 00:42:12,887 Mohawk, Mohawk, win again! 572 00:42:22,406 --> 00:42:25,102 Look out, Mohawks! North Star's comin' through! 573 00:42:38,856 --> 00:42:43,054 I don't know, Trip. Those Mohawks look better than last year. 574 00:42:43,127 --> 00:42:46,654 Guys, it's important for us to hustle at both ends of the court. 575 00:42:46,730 --> 00:42:48,664 We gotta make the offense work. 576 00:42:48,732 --> 00:42:51,667 We gotta play that big, tough ''D.'' We gotta contain their big men inside. 577 00:42:51,735 --> 00:42:55,034 We gotta crash the boards at offense. We can't give them the basellne. 578 00:42:55,105 --> 00:42:57,938 But more important than the score of this game... 579 00:42:58,008 --> 00:43:01,102 is to score at the big social at our place tonight. 580 00:43:01,178 --> 00:43:04,545 So I want you to go out there and protect your balls at any cost. 581 00:43:04,615 --> 00:43:06,242 All right! 582 00:43:06,317 --> 00:43:09,411 - Bruce Lee, patron of self-defense-- - Pray for us! 583 00:43:09,486 --> 00:43:11,420 - Hey! Let's go! - All right! 584 00:43:12,556 --> 00:43:15,423 - Let's go! - Go get 'em, guys. Thank you. 585 00:43:15,492 --> 00:43:18,427 Come on, Spaz. Let's go, Spaz. Sink it, babe. 586 00:43:19,496 --> 00:43:21,464 - Sorry, guys. - Fink, over here. 587 00:43:21,532 --> 00:43:23,693 This is how it's done. 588 00:43:24,802 --> 00:43:27,134 Looks good. Hardware, it looks good. 589 00:43:29,173 --> 00:43:30,765 All right! 590 00:43:37,014 --> 00:43:38,845 - Try it again. - Another one. 591 00:43:40,584 --> 00:43:43,781 You know, our guys don't look so good. 592 00:43:43,854 --> 00:43:45,344 They're not. 593 00:43:50,227 --> 00:43:51,888 Go, North Star, go! 594 00:43:53,297 --> 00:43:55,765 Hurt 'em again! Hurt 'em again! 595 00:44:02,673 --> 00:44:05,801 Hey, Wheels, you're goin' home in an ambulance. 596 00:44:05,876 --> 00:44:08,208 - Nice shirt, Crockett. - Thanks. 597 00:44:08,278 --> 00:44:09,870 - All right, guys. - Mook. 598 00:44:09,947 --> 00:44:13,610 Let's go. Let's play some basketball. Here we go. 599 00:44:23,694 --> 00:44:26,254 Hey, nice-goin', Mohawks. Nice-goin'. 600 00:44:26,330 --> 00:44:27,888 Assholes. 601 00:44:30,200 --> 00:44:32,134 - Am I all right? - Great try. 602 00:44:32,202 --> 00:44:33,635 I think we're in big trouble. 603 00:44:33,704 --> 00:44:36,036 That Crockett's really cute. 604 00:44:36,106 --> 00:44:39,166 Yeah, but he can't play basketball worth a shit. 605 00:44:45,816 --> 00:44:48,910 There are five guys. They play offense and defense... 606 00:44:48,986 --> 00:44:50,920 but they play at different ends of the court. 607 00:44:50,988 --> 00:44:52,546 They switch sides at halftime. 608 00:44:53,991 --> 00:44:55,481 Wheels! 609 00:44:57,928 --> 00:44:59,725 Hardware! 610 00:45:00,364 --> 00:45:02,127 - You all right? - Yeah. 611 00:45:02,199 --> 00:45:05,293 - Help him, Spaz. Come on. - Easy, easy. Come on. 612 00:45:06,203 --> 00:45:08,398 Now you know why they call that guy Rhino. 613 00:45:09,506 --> 00:45:12,942 - His nose is bleeding. - It's gonna get even bigger now. 614 00:45:13,010 --> 00:45:14,375 Jackie! 615 00:45:14,445 --> 00:45:16,208 - Hardware, you okay? - Yeah. 616 00:45:16,280 --> 00:45:19,147 Hardware Renzetti, girls. lt's just a nosebleed. 617 00:45:19,216 --> 00:45:22,982 Looks like he's gonna be at the social tonight. 618 00:45:23,053 --> 00:45:25,920 lt really doesn't look any worse. Really. 619 00:45:25,989 --> 00:45:28,014 - Really? - Go out there and kill 'em. 620 00:45:41,605 --> 00:45:44,199 Hey, Larry, you scored! 621 00:45:45,342 --> 00:45:49,005 Way to go! Okay, you guys, feed Fink. He's our hot man. 622 00:45:49,079 --> 00:45:50,603 Here, fella! 623 00:45:50,681 --> 00:45:52,114 All right! Yeah! 624 00:45:53,951 --> 00:45:56,852 Come on. Let's go. Let's kill 'em. 625 00:45:58,155 --> 00:46:01,022 - Come on, guys! That's it. - Oh, sure. 626 00:46:05,529 --> 00:46:07,326 Do it again, Larry! 627 00:46:21,478 --> 00:46:22,911 We can beat 'em anyway! 628 00:46:22,980 --> 00:46:25,915 lt's all right, it's okay! We can beat 'em anyway! 629 00:46:33,390 --> 00:46:35,915 Okay, the zone's not working. 630 00:46:35,993 --> 00:46:39,156 They're a little bit too good to cover man-to-man... 631 00:46:39,229 --> 00:46:41,424 and we can't shoot for shit. 632 00:46:41,498 --> 00:46:44,399 What kind of talk's that for a coach? 633 00:46:44,468 --> 00:46:48,268 I'm not gonna lie. There's no way we're gonna beat this team. 634 00:46:48,338 --> 00:46:50,203 What are we gonna do, Trip? 635 00:46:50,274 --> 00:46:52,469 - We're gonna lose. - What? 636 00:46:53,544 --> 00:46:56,980 But we can lose with some self-respect. Here's the idea. 637 00:47:08,926 --> 00:47:10,223 Yea, fellas! 638 00:47:12,396 --> 00:47:14,159 Nice team spirit. 639 00:47:14,231 --> 00:47:17,200 I'll talk to you after the game. 640 00:47:17,267 --> 00:47:20,395 - Late as usual. - Where were you, young man? 641 00:47:20,470 --> 00:47:22,404 Okay, guys, a little teamwork now. 642 00:47:41,992 --> 00:47:44,552 Spaz, get in the bus! Hurry up! 643 00:47:49,766 --> 00:47:53,668 This is the proudest moment in North Star history! 644 00:48:16,660 --> 00:48:18,355 Forget it, Spaz. 645 00:48:18,428 --> 00:48:20,191 They all want me. 646 00:48:26,136 --> 00:48:28,400 Candace is sure lookin' good tonight. 647 00:48:28,472 --> 00:48:31,669 So he offered me 200 bucks to run the saillng program. 648 00:48:31,742 --> 00:48:35,735 I said, forget it. Two hundred bucks doesn't even buy me a pair of shoes. 649 00:48:35,812 --> 00:48:37,245 I'm the best-- 650 00:48:38,348 --> 00:48:40,509 Now the serious partying can begin. 651 00:48:42,452 --> 00:48:45,012 Okay, virgins on the right... 652 00:48:45,088 --> 00:48:47,181 nonvirgins on the left. 653 00:48:47,257 --> 00:48:50,658 You fellas can divide 'em up any way you like. 49759

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