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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,108 --> 00:00:02,928 ♪ People keep saying that I'm doing it wrong ♪ 2 00:00:02,929 --> 00:00:05,719 ♪ But I say it feels all right ♪ 3 00:00:05,716 --> 00:00:09,856 ♪ I really do try, really do try, really do try ♪ 4 00:00:09,857 --> 00:00:12,947 ♪ There's a million things that I could change ♪ 5 00:00:12,948 --> 00:00:15,678 ♪ But maybe it's all right ♪ 6 00:00:15,676 --> 00:00:19,316 ♪ 'Cause this is my life, this if my life, this is my life ♪ 7 00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:21,670 - Okay, so we're playing Grove End today. 8 00:00:21,670 --> 00:00:24,110 It might be a friendly, but I still want you to go out there 9 00:00:24,110 --> 00:00:26,100 and break those little bitches' hearts. 10 00:00:26,100 --> 00:00:27,240 And ankles. 11 00:00:27,240 --> 00:00:28,970 Holli, why are you wearing three bras? 12 00:00:28,970 --> 00:00:31,060 Christ, you've got more coverage than Vodafone. 13 00:00:31,060 --> 00:00:32,690 - I always wear three bras on match day, Miss. 14 00:00:32,690 --> 00:00:34,410 - Her little thing. - It's lucky. 15 00:00:34,410 --> 00:00:35,240 - Yeah, well, breasts that size, 16 00:00:35,243 --> 00:00:36,213 it's basic health and safety. 17 00:00:36,207 --> 00:00:37,747 - And I'm wearing my special boots. 18 00:00:37,750 --> 00:00:39,170 They're two sizes too small 19 00:00:39,170 --> 00:00:41,060 and they make my toes proper bleed. 20 00:00:41,060 --> 00:00:41,890 - But they're lucky. 21 00:00:41,893 --> 00:00:43,603 - And Saz has just been for her lucky wee. 22 00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:46,070 She's got to do three wees, one in each cubicle. 23 00:00:46,067 --> 00:00:47,037 (toilet flushing) - Yeah, well, everyone's got 24 00:00:47,043 --> 00:00:48,253 a match day thing. 25 00:00:48,246 --> 00:00:50,306 Ria has to eat a Kit Kat just before we kick off, 26 00:00:50,310 --> 00:00:52,130 and so does Shannabelle, and so does Jade. 27 00:00:52,130 --> 00:00:52,960 - It's lucky. 28 00:00:52,963 --> 00:00:55,063 - I didn't know you girls were so superstitious. 29 00:00:55,060 --> 00:00:57,520 What about you, Viva, what's your little nutbag thing? 30 00:00:57,520 --> 00:00:58,460 - I don't have one. 31 00:00:58,460 --> 00:00:59,810 - Yeah, she doesn't have one. 32 00:00:59,810 --> 00:01:01,100 - She's too sensible. 33 00:01:01,100 --> 00:01:02,730 - Well, Viva, I think you'd better get one. 34 00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:05,970 The rest of the team are putting in 110%! 35 00:01:05,970 --> 00:01:07,380 Come on, girls, let's get warmed up. 36 00:01:07,378 --> 00:01:09,958 (lively music) 37 00:01:22,065 --> 00:01:23,525 - That was amazing. 38 00:01:23,526 --> 00:01:24,366 - Nine, nil. 39 00:01:24,369 --> 00:01:25,389 Job done. 40 00:01:25,390 --> 00:01:27,050 - That's the best I've ever played! 41 00:01:27,050 --> 00:01:27,880 - Two hat tricks, Amber. 42 00:01:27,883 --> 00:01:28,843 What can I say?! 43 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:30,520 - No, Miss, I scored six. 44 00:01:30,520 --> 00:01:31,710 - Good girl, Amber. 45 00:01:31,710 --> 00:01:33,330 Nice move when you smashed that number seven 46 00:01:33,330 --> 00:01:34,920 in the face with your cast. 47 00:01:34,916 --> 00:01:37,026 - No, that was an accident, Miss. 48 00:01:37,030 --> 00:01:38,100 - Course it was! 49 00:01:38,095 --> 00:01:38,925 (laughs) 50 00:01:38,928 --> 00:01:40,278 Oh, jeez, I need to sit down. 51 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:41,110 - You all right? 52 00:01:41,113 --> 00:01:42,613 Is it the baby? 53 00:01:42,610 --> 00:01:44,670 - Yes, she's kind of punching my cervix, 54 00:01:44,670 --> 00:01:46,210 which is what I wanted to talk about. 55 00:01:46,210 --> 00:01:47,360 - What, your cervix? 56 00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:48,650 - Maternity leave. 57 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:51,530 This little muffin is nearly cooked and I need to go home 58 00:01:51,530 --> 00:01:53,830 and get some rest before she comes out of the oven, 59 00:01:53,830 --> 00:01:56,430 AKA my vagina. 60 00:01:56,430 --> 00:01:59,240 But, before I do that, I need to appoint a temporary coach 61 00:01:59,240 --> 00:02:00,190 for the West Mount game. 62 00:02:00,190 --> 00:02:01,260 - What about Mr. Phillips? 63 00:02:01,260 --> 00:02:03,450 - Yeah, I've asked him, but he's meeting his birth mother 64 00:02:03,450 --> 00:02:05,700 for the first time that day and he doesn't want to postpone. 65 00:02:05,700 --> 00:02:08,060 I don't know what the big rush is, they've waited 30 years. 66 00:02:08,060 --> 00:02:09,750 - Miss Dennis? - Miss Dennis?! 67 00:02:09,750 --> 00:02:12,040 She's gay and she fancies me. 68 00:02:12,040 --> 00:02:13,470 I don't want to owe her. 69 00:02:13,470 --> 00:02:15,360 Christ knows what that would involve. 70 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:16,400 - One of us could do it. 71 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:17,700 - Exactly! 72 00:02:17,700 --> 00:02:19,580 Who wants it?! 73 00:02:19,580 --> 00:02:21,940 No, but who really wants it? 74 00:02:21,940 --> 00:02:24,840 Who wants it 110%? 75 00:02:24,842 --> 00:02:25,882 Who votes for Saz? 76 00:02:28,810 --> 00:02:29,640 Five out of seven. 77 00:02:29,643 --> 00:02:31,333 Okay, Saz, you've won. 78 00:02:31,330 --> 00:02:32,890 You're the new coach, woo. 79 00:02:32,890 --> 00:02:33,930 - I won? 80 00:02:33,930 --> 00:02:35,640 People voted for me? 81 00:02:35,640 --> 00:02:37,110 People really voted for me?! 82 00:02:37,110 --> 00:02:37,940 - Looks like it. 83 00:02:37,943 --> 00:02:40,033 I don't know why, I'd have voted for Holli. 84 00:02:40,030 --> 00:02:43,250 - This is wonderful, thanks so much for the opportunity, 85 00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:44,520 I won't let you down. 86 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:46,280 - She thinks she's on fucking "X Factor." 87 00:02:46,280 --> 00:02:48,130 - I'm so proud to be voted coach. 88 00:02:48,130 --> 00:02:51,140 And next week, I will lead us out to beat West Mount. 89 00:02:51,137 --> 00:02:53,807 - Oh, get real, Saz, that is not gonna happen. 90 00:02:53,810 --> 00:02:54,990 West Mount are good. 91 00:02:54,990 --> 00:02:57,310 - With respect, Miss Hitchcock, I'm the coach now 92 00:02:57,310 --> 00:02:59,150 and I believe Greenshoots Girls can win. 93 00:02:59,150 --> 00:03:00,410 This is work. 94 00:03:00,410 --> 00:03:01,240 We've got a job to do. 95 00:03:01,243 --> 00:03:02,083 Let's do it! 96 00:03:03,700 --> 00:03:05,870 Thank you, thanks for voting, thank you very much. 97 00:03:05,873 --> 00:03:07,653 - What the fuck did you vote Saz for? 98 00:03:07,650 --> 00:03:09,550 - I didn't think anyone else would vote for Saz. 99 00:03:09,546 --> 00:03:11,266 - Why did them others vote for Saz? 100 00:03:11,270 --> 00:03:14,930 - Think some of the girls think you're a bit too violent. 101 00:03:14,928 --> 00:03:18,008 (gentle piano music) 102 00:03:20,146 --> 00:03:21,896 (bottle crashes) 103 00:03:21,899 --> 00:03:22,979 - Too violent?! 104 00:03:22,980 --> 00:03:23,810 Too violent?! 105 00:03:23,813 --> 00:03:24,653 On a football pitch? 106 00:03:24,646 --> 00:03:26,106 Is there such a thing as too violent?! 107 00:03:26,110 --> 00:03:27,280 - Yes, Holli, there is. 108 00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:29,480 You clearly headbutted their number three. 109 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:30,570 - So? 110 00:03:30,570 --> 00:03:32,320 - As part of your goal celebration? 111 00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:33,770 - That is my goal celebration. 112 00:03:38,550 --> 00:03:39,890 - Brandon's here. 113 00:03:39,889 --> 00:03:42,259 (faintly speaking) 114 00:03:42,264 --> 00:03:44,624 Not that I care. 115 00:03:44,623 --> 00:03:47,453 Oh, my god, he's coming over. 116 00:03:47,450 --> 00:03:49,200 Not that I care. 117 00:03:49,199 --> 00:03:50,159 Do I look pretty? 118 00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:52,360 - Not that we care. 119 00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:53,310 - Have you seen Junior? 120 00:03:53,310 --> 00:03:55,280 He's gone wandering again. 121 00:03:55,280 --> 00:03:58,870 - Brandon's granddad is a bit, what's that word, Brandon? 122 00:03:58,870 --> 00:04:01,480 - Annoying, incontinent, annoying. 123 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:03,780 - I can't remember the word, but he's a bit... 124 00:04:04,910 --> 00:04:06,500 - Are you trying to say he's senile? 125 00:04:06,499 --> 00:04:08,429 - Nah, I think he's Jamaican. 126 00:04:08,433 --> 00:04:10,623 - There's no fucking sugar, innit? 127 00:04:11,688 --> 00:04:13,698 - Brandon's granddad likes eating sugar. 128 00:04:13,700 --> 00:04:15,970 - Last night, he drank an entire tin of golden syrup 129 00:04:15,970 --> 00:04:16,800 when I went toilet. 130 00:04:16,803 --> 00:04:18,153 - [Amber] I bet your mum went mad. 131 00:04:18,150 --> 00:04:20,300 - No, 'cause she wasn't there. 132 00:04:20,300 --> 00:04:21,580 She's on a cruise. 133 00:04:21,580 --> 00:04:23,560 - Where? - The fucking sea, where else? 134 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:24,970 Says she needed a break. 135 00:04:24,970 --> 00:04:26,650 Got it all booked up without even telling me. 136 00:04:26,650 --> 00:04:27,760 And that's not right. 137 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:29,790 You don't just go off and leave your little child 138 00:04:29,790 --> 00:04:31,230 to fend for himself. 139 00:04:31,227 --> 00:04:32,977 - Has anyone got any sugar?! 140 00:04:32,980 --> 00:04:35,180 - So who's looking after you? 141 00:04:35,180 --> 00:04:36,010 - I am! 142 00:04:36,013 --> 00:04:38,403 I'm looking after me, and I'm looking after Junior. 143 00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:39,400 - All by yourself? 144 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:41,760 - Yeah, all by myself. 145 00:04:41,760 --> 00:04:43,220 Alone. 146 00:04:43,220 --> 00:04:45,280 - Is this a proper fucking cafe or not?! 147 00:04:45,280 --> 00:04:47,280 - Why don't you let me help you look after the house 148 00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:48,290 while your mum's away? 149 00:04:48,287 --> 00:04:49,287 - Can you? 150 00:04:49,290 --> 00:04:50,240 - [Holli] Fuck off! 151 00:04:52,420 --> 00:04:54,310 That's weird, there's sugar on the floor. 152 00:04:54,310 --> 00:04:55,480 - It's kind of a trail. 153 00:04:57,600 --> 00:04:59,690 Oh, my god, this is so Sherlock. 154 00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:05,470 - [Amber] It's Junior! 155 00:05:05,470 --> 00:05:07,380 - Found him, case closed. 156 00:05:07,380 --> 00:05:09,440 - Elementary, and I ain't even joking. 157 00:05:09,435 --> 00:05:11,695 - I've got to go. 158 00:05:11,704 --> 00:05:13,594 Amber, I need you. 159 00:05:17,430 --> 00:05:18,260 - He needs me! 160 00:05:19,184 --> 00:05:20,484 - Don't do all their cleaning! 161 00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:22,160 - [Saz] Don't do all their cooking! 162 00:05:22,160 --> 00:05:24,190 - And don't do Brandon! 163 00:05:24,188 --> 00:05:26,768 (upbeat music) 164 00:05:29,400 --> 00:05:31,510 - I've been looking for you. 165 00:05:31,510 --> 00:05:32,430 What's that? 166 00:05:32,427 --> 00:05:34,757 - What? - I thought I saw my name. 167 00:05:34,758 --> 00:05:35,608 - Oh, yeah, that. 168 00:05:35,611 --> 00:05:36,461 It's my geography project. 169 00:05:36,457 --> 00:05:39,507 - "The Physical Geography of The Rocky Mountains." 170 00:05:39,510 --> 00:05:40,360 - Yeah. 171 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:41,580 Everyone has to do a project. 172 00:05:41,580 --> 00:05:43,180 - Is it 'cause you still love me? 173 00:05:43,180 --> 00:05:44,010 A little bit? 174 00:05:44,013 --> 00:05:44,853 - No. 175 00:05:45,770 --> 00:05:48,340 - I wanted to talk to you about that, actually, 176 00:05:48,340 --> 00:05:49,900 'cause now you've split up with Tyler, I thought-- 177 00:05:49,900 --> 00:05:51,520 - No, Rocky, we're over. 178 00:05:51,520 --> 00:05:53,490 - So you're what, 90% sure of that? 179 00:05:53,490 --> 00:05:55,470 - No. - I'll settle for 95% sure. 180 00:05:55,468 --> 00:05:56,368 - No, Rocky. 181 00:05:56,370 --> 00:05:57,860 - Shake for 99, final offer. 182 00:05:59,030 --> 00:06:00,790 - I'm a thousand percent sure we're a thousand percent over. 183 00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:03,651 - Okay. 184 00:06:04,590 --> 00:06:05,790 That's a lot of percent. 185 00:06:06,880 --> 00:06:07,810 I'll leave you alone then, yeah? 186 00:06:07,810 --> 00:06:09,850 I'm sorry if I made it hard for you and Tyler, 187 00:06:09,850 --> 00:06:11,870 but it was difficult for me to see you 188 00:06:11,870 --> 00:06:13,070 with that chicken penis. 189 00:06:14,293 --> 00:06:16,643 (somber music) 190 00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:17,470 - Bye. 191 00:06:19,590 --> 00:06:22,070 That might be the last thing he ever says to me. 192 00:06:22,070 --> 00:06:23,390 - God! 193 00:06:23,390 --> 00:06:25,620 Do chickens even have penises? 194 00:06:25,618 --> 00:06:26,948 (whistle shrills) 195 00:06:26,950 --> 00:06:28,070 - Thanks for coming, everyone. 196 00:06:28,070 --> 00:06:31,170 I know it's lunch, but, yes, Holli? 197 00:06:31,170 --> 00:06:32,550 - Shouldn't we be outside kicking a ball 198 00:06:32,550 --> 00:06:33,890 and not wasting our time in here? 199 00:06:33,890 --> 00:06:35,180 - Thank you, Holli, 200 00:06:35,180 --> 00:06:36,640 but I'll let you know when we're going outside, 201 00:06:36,640 --> 00:06:38,600 because I'm the coach. 202 00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:39,840 Sit down, Holli. 203 00:06:39,842 --> 00:06:41,292 (chuckles) 204 00:06:41,290 --> 00:06:43,370 Holli, do we have a discipline problem?! 205 00:06:45,540 --> 00:06:46,370 - No. 206 00:06:46,373 --> 00:06:48,153 - "No, Coach." 207 00:06:48,150 --> 00:06:50,360 - Yeah, like I'm gonna call you Coach. 208 00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:51,650 - Okay. 209 00:06:51,650 --> 00:06:53,640 So Friday is supposed to be windy, 210 00:06:53,640 --> 00:06:56,770 so we'll start with my analysis of why wind is important 211 00:06:56,770 --> 00:06:58,180 and how it can help us. 212 00:06:58,180 --> 00:07:01,180 Then we'll move onto my windy weather game plan. 213 00:07:04,840 --> 00:07:06,210 So there we are. 214 00:07:06,210 --> 00:07:07,210 Any questions? 215 00:07:07,210 --> 00:07:08,230 - I've got one. 216 00:07:08,230 --> 00:07:09,860 Who wishes they'd voted for me now? 217 00:07:09,860 --> 00:07:12,120 Jade, Shannabelle, Ria, Viva? 218 00:07:12,120 --> 00:07:13,540 Talking to you, bitches. 219 00:07:13,540 --> 00:07:16,190 - Do we really have to have all these strategies, Saz? 220 00:07:16,190 --> 00:07:17,860 Can't we just try to win? 221 00:07:17,860 --> 00:07:18,800 I'm really hungry. 222 00:07:18,800 --> 00:07:20,970 - Amber, shit attitude. 223 00:07:20,967 --> 00:07:23,697 All of you, shit attitude! 224 00:07:23,700 --> 00:07:25,440 Except for Viva. 225 00:07:25,440 --> 00:07:28,290 Viva, I saw you taking notes, well done. 226 00:07:28,290 --> 00:07:30,220 Non-shit attitude! 227 00:07:30,220 --> 00:07:31,890 - She's not even taking notes, Miss. 228 00:07:31,890 --> 00:07:32,720 I mean, Saz. 229 00:07:32,723 --> 00:07:33,623 I mean, Coach. 230 00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:34,449 Look! 231 00:07:36,243 --> 00:07:38,023 I knew you still liked Rocky. 232 00:07:38,022 --> 00:07:38,862 - What? 233 00:07:38,855 --> 00:07:40,185 I don't still like Rocky. 234 00:07:40,190 --> 00:07:42,810 - Then why are you doodling his name, then? 235 00:07:42,811 --> 00:07:43,911 - I don't know. 236 00:07:43,913 --> 00:07:46,103 Maybe there's a time lag between my hand and my brain, 237 00:07:46,100 --> 00:07:48,050 and my brain hasn't got round to telling my hand 238 00:07:48,050 --> 00:07:49,550 that I don't like him. 239 00:07:49,550 --> 00:07:51,220 - Your hand really needs to sit down 240 00:07:51,223 --> 00:07:53,243 with your brain for a chat, then. 241 00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:55,320 - And my face needs to sit down with some chips. 242 00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:56,720 Come on. - Okay, girls, 243 00:07:56,720 --> 00:07:58,420 see you after school for training. 244 00:08:05,410 --> 00:08:06,480 Did it go well? 245 00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:08,050 'Cause I can't always tell. 246 00:08:08,048 --> 00:08:09,808 - No, Saz, it didn't go well. 247 00:08:09,810 --> 00:08:11,760 - Are you just joking that it didn't go well? 248 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:13,110 'cause I can't always tell. 249 00:08:14,470 --> 00:08:16,900 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, I am just joking, 250 00:08:16,900 --> 00:08:20,100 but maybe you are taking it all a bit too seriously. 251 00:08:20,102 --> 00:08:22,772 (elegant music) 252 00:08:26,639 --> 00:08:27,689 (sighs) 253 00:08:27,692 --> 00:08:30,282 (upbeat music) 254 00:08:31,641 --> 00:08:33,101 (cellphone chimes) 255 00:08:33,104 --> 00:08:35,944 (cellphone beeps) 256 00:08:43,620 --> 00:08:44,600 - I'm cold. 257 00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:46,030 What is this fuckery, Saz? 258 00:08:46,030 --> 00:08:47,570 - Shut up, Holli! 259 00:08:47,570 --> 00:08:49,410 We're trying something different today, 260 00:08:49,410 --> 00:08:51,270 it's called visualization. 261 00:08:51,273 --> 00:08:53,413 Now, like I was saying, you've got the ball, 262 00:08:53,410 --> 00:08:55,600 you're running towards the goal. 263 00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:57,530 It's an awesome run. 264 00:08:57,530 --> 00:09:00,300 You see a chance, you choose your spot, 265 00:09:01,253 --> 00:09:05,023 and, oh, you just scored the epicest goal ever. 266 00:09:06,140 --> 00:09:09,280 A massive wave of joy surges through your body. 267 00:09:10,460 --> 00:09:12,800 Greenshoots have won! 268 00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:15,200 Your heart is bursting with pride 269 00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:17,610 and it's time to get your trophy. 270 00:09:17,610 --> 00:09:21,190 It's gold and it feels amazing. 271 00:09:21,190 --> 00:09:22,900 You're a winner! 272 00:09:25,422 --> 00:09:26,262 - Rocky? 273 00:09:27,593 --> 00:09:28,433 Rocky! 274 00:09:31,380 --> 00:09:32,300 - This stuff is bullshit. 275 00:09:32,300 --> 00:09:34,860 How is this supposed to help us beat West Mount? 276 00:09:34,860 --> 00:09:36,000 Saz has lost it. 277 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,560 Who's with me? 278 00:09:37,560 --> 00:09:39,120 - Holli, what are you whispering about? 279 00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:40,920 - Nothing. - Come on, Holli. 280 00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:43,880 No time for chatting, unless you want a detention. 281 00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:46,630 Maybe you all want a detention. 282 00:09:46,630 --> 00:09:48,730 Who wants a detention?! 283 00:09:48,730 --> 00:09:50,010 - Fuck's sake, calm your hype. 284 00:09:50,010 --> 00:09:51,780 - You mean, "Calm your hype, Coach." 285 00:09:51,780 --> 00:09:54,170 - [Viva] Saz, I think you're getting a bit carried away. 286 00:09:54,170 --> 00:09:55,000 - Carried away? 287 00:09:55,003 --> 00:09:55,843 She's lost it. 288 00:09:55,836 --> 00:09:57,726 Who votes for another vote for who's the coach? 289 00:09:57,730 --> 00:09:58,990 - No, we're not doing that. 290 00:09:58,990 --> 00:10:00,780 - Why? Are you scared? 291 00:10:00,780 --> 00:10:01,610 Come on. 292 00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:08,580 - I'm not sure I turned it round. 293 00:10:08,580 --> 00:10:10,800 I'm still feeling that hostile vibe, Viva. 294 00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:12,700 When I did the visualization, 295 00:10:12,700 --> 00:10:14,700 I suddenly saw everyone holding a knife. 296 00:10:15,650 --> 00:10:16,700 Did you see anything weird? 297 00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:18,060 - No! 298 00:10:18,056 --> 00:10:19,056 Not weird at all. 299 00:10:21,175 --> 00:10:23,555 Wakey-wakey, Amber. 300 00:10:23,560 --> 00:10:25,350 - 10 more minutes, Mum. 301 00:10:25,347 --> 00:10:28,097 (doorbell rings) 302 00:10:29,110 --> 00:10:31,700 Okay, I'm gonna cook us all a lovely dinner. 303 00:10:31,700 --> 00:10:32,900 - Why don't we go upstairs? 304 00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:34,490 Junior won't even know. 305 00:10:34,490 --> 00:10:35,580 - Brandon, you know I'm just here 306 00:10:35,580 --> 00:10:37,210 to help you look after things while your mum's away. 307 00:10:37,210 --> 00:10:39,240 - Yeah, you can help me look after my penis. 308 00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:40,680 - No, that's not what I meant. 309 00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:41,880 - I know, but we can still-- 310 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:42,710 - Enjoy being together? 311 00:10:42,713 --> 00:10:44,533 - Yeah, and-- - Watch telly together? 312 00:10:44,530 --> 00:10:45,780 - Yes, and-- - Play that game? 313 00:10:45,780 --> 00:10:47,580 Pregnant ladies wrestling match? 314 00:10:49,118 --> 00:10:52,718 ♪ Ooh, ah ♪ 315 00:10:52,718 --> 00:10:54,598 ♪ Ooh ♪ 316 00:10:54,595 --> 00:10:56,715 (Brandon groans) 317 00:10:56,717 --> 00:10:58,357 - My baby's coming! 318 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:01,120 My baby's coming! (Amber laughs) 319 00:11:01,120 --> 00:11:03,080 Yeah, that was a good game, 320 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:06,050 but I was thinking more of that game where we, you know, 321 00:11:06,050 --> 00:11:07,340 fuck each other's brains out. 322 00:11:07,340 --> 00:11:11,890 - Oh, Brandon. (footsteps treading) 323 00:11:11,890 --> 00:11:12,930 Thanks. 324 00:11:12,930 --> 00:11:15,680 - Okay, now is not a good time, Junior. 325 00:11:15,680 --> 00:11:18,360 Amber will make you a nice cup of tea in a minute. 326 00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:19,490 Typical. 327 00:11:19,490 --> 00:11:20,620 Never offers me a lolly. 328 00:11:20,620 --> 00:11:22,120 I've got to steal them when he's asleep. 329 00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:23,460 - Maybe if you were nicer to him. 330 00:11:23,460 --> 00:11:25,980 - I am nice, just not as nice as you. 331 00:11:25,980 --> 00:11:28,820 I mean, you're the complete package, Amber. 332 00:11:28,820 --> 00:11:31,010 Your hair, your legs, 333 00:11:31,010 --> 00:11:33,970 the cute way you stick your tongue out when you're thinking. 334 00:11:33,970 --> 00:11:36,330 - You're just saying that, you don't really like that face. 335 00:11:36,325 --> 00:11:38,325 - No, I do. - Stop complimenting me. 336 00:11:38,327 --> 00:11:41,907 I'm only here to make Spicy Sizzlin' Chicken. 337 00:11:41,910 --> 00:11:44,430 - You can't just go around saying Spicy Sizzlin' Chicken 338 00:11:44,430 --> 00:11:45,820 and expect me not to get aroused. 339 00:11:45,820 --> 00:11:47,970 It makes you look real sexy. 340 00:11:47,970 --> 00:11:49,140 - Seriously, Brandon. 341 00:11:49,140 --> 00:11:50,920 Shut up or I'm leaving! 342 00:11:50,920 --> 00:11:52,130 Why do you keep saying this stuff?! 343 00:11:52,130 --> 00:11:52,960 Why don't you listen to me? 344 00:11:52,963 --> 00:11:54,373 - 'Cause I know you like me. 345 00:11:54,370 --> 00:11:56,000 And I know you want me. 346 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:57,630 And you know I'm your boy. 347 00:11:57,630 --> 00:11:59,760 - Except you did it with my sister! 348 00:11:59,755 --> 00:12:01,005 - What, you still remember that? 349 00:12:01,010 --> 00:12:04,070 - Yes, I still remember, it was the worst moment of my life. 350 00:12:04,073 --> 00:12:06,503 And that's including when I realized my dog, Toggle, 351 00:12:06,500 --> 00:12:07,600 preferred my dad! 352 00:12:07,600 --> 00:12:09,900 - Do you know what, this is quite frustrating. 353 00:12:09,900 --> 00:12:11,270 I've got a massive boner 354 00:12:11,270 --> 00:12:14,020 and now I'm gonna have to run this thing off or something. 355 00:12:14,020 --> 00:12:16,870 I can't stay here with you feeling like this. 356 00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:18,160 - Okay. 357 00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:20,290 I'll make a start on dinner. 358 00:12:20,292 --> 00:12:21,262 (Brandon sighs) 359 00:12:21,260 --> 00:12:23,250 (fork clacks) Love to cook. 360 00:12:23,247 --> 00:12:25,907 (fork clacking) 361 00:12:27,250 --> 00:12:29,330 Spicy Sizzlin' Chicken. 362 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,450 I made you a cup of tea! 363 00:12:36,450 --> 00:12:37,840 - Thank you, Amber. 364 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:39,710 Has Brandon gone out? 365 00:12:39,713 --> 00:12:42,213 - Yeah, he had to, uh, go out. 366 00:12:43,580 --> 00:12:46,920 - Tell me where he's hidden the golden syrup. 367 00:12:46,921 --> 00:12:48,161 - Oh, you're not supposed to. 368 00:12:48,157 --> 00:12:52,767 - If you tell me, I can tell you stuff about Brandon, 369 00:12:52,770 --> 00:12:57,550 all kind of stuff about who he gets up to. 370 00:12:57,554 --> 00:12:58,654 - "Who"? 371 00:12:58,650 --> 00:13:01,910 Did you mean what he gets up to or did you mean who? 372 00:13:01,910 --> 00:13:03,570 - Golden syrup. 373 00:13:06,051 --> 00:13:08,631 (upbeat music) 374 00:13:18,945 --> 00:13:19,775 - Junior. 375 00:13:21,057 --> 00:13:22,467 Junior! 376 00:13:22,473 --> 00:13:23,313 Junior! 377 00:13:23,306 --> 00:13:26,056 (ominous music) 378 00:13:26,063 --> 00:13:28,503 (cellphone beeps) 379 00:13:28,495 --> 00:13:31,495 (cellphone buzzing) 380 00:13:34,225 --> 00:13:36,475 Aw, Spicy Sizzlin' Chicken. 381 00:13:45,125 --> 00:13:46,695 (cellphone buzzing) - What 1976 film 382 00:13:46,700 --> 00:13:48,350 starring Sylvester Stallone 383 00:13:48,354 --> 00:13:51,134 spawned five sequels? - Rocky. 384 00:13:51,127 --> 00:13:51,957 Rocky. 385 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,890 - It's Amber, she's babysitting Junior. 386 00:13:53,890 --> 00:13:55,160 She thinks he's dead. 387 00:13:55,160 --> 00:13:56,900 - Tell her to put him in the recovery position 388 00:13:56,900 --> 00:13:58,350 and call an ambulance. 389 00:13:58,352 --> 00:14:01,102 (Amber grunting) 390 00:14:03,620 --> 00:14:06,040 - It won't work, he's like spaghetti! 391 00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:07,430 - Try slapping him in the face. 392 00:14:07,430 --> 00:14:08,340 - No. 393 00:14:08,344 --> 00:14:10,244 He's really frail, she might hurt him. 394 00:14:11,700 --> 00:14:12,910 - It's not working. 395 00:14:12,910 --> 00:14:14,020 - It's not working. 396 00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:15,430 She's gonna whack him with a cushion. 397 00:14:15,430 --> 00:14:17,530 - Tell her to call an ambulance before she kills him. 398 00:14:17,530 --> 00:14:19,440 - It's not working! 399 00:14:19,435 --> 00:14:21,835 I'm gonna try something else! 400 00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:23,600 - She's waterboarding him with her Coke. 401 00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:28,601 - It's not working! 402 00:14:28,789 --> 00:14:29,699 - It's not working. 403 00:14:29,700 --> 00:14:31,360 - I really hope he's not dead. 404 00:14:35,920 --> 00:14:37,080 - He's dead, Holli. 405 00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:38,610 He's dead. 406 00:14:38,610 --> 00:14:39,950 Dead, dead, dead. 407 00:14:39,950 --> 00:14:41,610 Completely dead. 408 00:14:41,610 --> 00:14:44,330 I tried to save him, but I just couldn't! 409 00:14:44,330 --> 00:14:45,830 He's dead! 410 00:14:45,830 --> 00:14:49,130 I'm standing in a room with a dead man! 411 00:14:50,260 --> 00:14:51,980 (screams) 412 00:14:51,980 --> 00:14:54,730 (haunting music) 413 00:14:56,817 --> 00:14:59,397 (upbeat music) 414 00:15:05,457 --> 00:15:06,287 - Rocky! 415 00:15:06,290 --> 00:15:07,830 - He didn't see you. 416 00:15:08,668 --> 00:15:09,718 - Rocky! 417 00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:11,690 - Oh, my god, how humiliating. 418 00:15:11,690 --> 00:15:12,620 Sit down, Viva. 419 00:15:12,620 --> 00:15:14,180 - He didn't see me. 420 00:15:14,180 --> 00:15:15,710 Doesn't matter. 421 00:15:15,705 --> 00:15:16,605 I don't even care. 422 00:15:17,510 --> 00:15:19,400 Should I text him and tell him that he didn't see me? 423 00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:21,100 - Why don't you just admit you still like him? 424 00:15:21,100 --> 00:15:23,120 - Because I don't still like him. 425 00:15:23,124 --> 00:15:24,194 (snorts) 426 00:15:24,193 --> 00:15:25,923 I don't know what you're laughing at, Amber. 427 00:15:25,920 --> 00:15:28,730 Brandon is completely using you and making you look a fool. 428 00:15:28,730 --> 00:15:29,750 - No, he's not, I'm just being kind. 429 00:15:29,750 --> 00:15:31,460 - Gullible, more like. 430 00:15:31,460 --> 00:15:33,920 - Yeah, kind, gullible, caring, 431 00:15:33,920 --> 00:15:34,950 they're all the same, aren't they? 432 00:15:34,945 --> 00:15:36,325 - No, they're different. 433 00:15:36,334 --> 00:15:37,384 - Are they? 434 00:15:37,380 --> 00:15:38,210 Well, I don't care. 435 00:15:38,213 --> 00:15:39,973 If I can help Brandon till his mum comes back, 436 00:15:39,970 --> 00:15:40,860 that's just being nice. 437 00:15:40,860 --> 00:15:43,850 - So long as you're helping and not just doing everything. 438 00:15:43,850 --> 00:15:46,110 - Well, I have to do quite a bit, 'cause the funny thing is, 439 00:15:46,110 --> 00:15:47,130 Brandon doesn't know how to work 440 00:15:47,130 --> 00:15:48,240 a lot of the stuff in his house. 441 00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:49,120 - I bet he doesn't. 442 00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:51,520 - He thought his vacuum cleaner was some sort of ornament, 443 00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:53,290 so I had to show him how to work it. 444 00:15:55,540 --> 00:15:57,850 - Girls, I hope you all enjoyed the chips I bought you, 445 00:15:57,850 --> 00:15:59,890 but it's time to get down to some team talk. 446 00:15:59,890 --> 00:16:01,270 - Can I tell everyone about my idea? 447 00:16:01,270 --> 00:16:02,600 - Thank you, Holli, but not right now. 448 00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:03,450 - Come on, Coach. 449 00:16:04,820 --> 00:16:05,990 - Okay. 450 00:16:05,990 --> 00:16:08,520 Yeah, Holls, you go for it. 451 00:16:08,520 --> 00:16:10,370 I welcome your input. 452 00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:11,630 - We've just got to sort out the table. 453 00:16:11,630 --> 00:16:14,210 (upbeat music) 454 00:16:16,290 --> 00:16:18,150 So if Ria positions herself 455 00:16:18,150 --> 00:16:19,800 between the defense and the midfield, 456 00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:22,170 then she can pick up through balls to Viva and me. 457 00:16:22,170 --> 00:16:23,290 - I want Ria forward. 458 00:16:23,290 --> 00:16:24,120 - Fuck's sake. 459 00:16:24,123 --> 00:16:25,103 Ria is forward. 460 00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:26,380 Ria is the mustard. 461 00:16:26,380 --> 00:16:27,260 Are you even listening?! 462 00:16:27,256 --> 00:16:28,086 - Ria's the mustard? 463 00:16:28,089 --> 00:16:29,439 You said she was the pepper. 464 00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:32,250 - No, Amber's the pepper, Viva's the salt, 465 00:16:32,250 --> 00:16:33,560 and you're the old teabag. 466 00:16:35,610 --> 00:16:36,620 - I'm not being funny, Holls, 467 00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:39,060 but it's best you leave the brainwork to me. 468 00:16:39,060 --> 00:16:40,610 This is how it's gonna work: 469 00:16:40,610 --> 00:16:43,490 Me, Jade, Holli, 470 00:16:43,490 --> 00:16:46,400 Viva, Amber, Ria, 471 00:16:46,400 --> 00:16:49,410 Shannabelle, Dominique. 472 00:16:49,410 --> 00:16:51,240 Got it all very carefully planned out. 473 00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:52,070 - Saz, that's eight. 474 00:16:52,073 --> 00:16:53,343 We're playing seven a side. 475 00:16:53,340 --> 00:16:56,010 - Ha, "I'm Saz, I took my maths GCSE early 476 00:16:56,007 --> 00:16:57,767 "and I still can't count to seven." 477 00:16:57,770 --> 00:16:59,330 - Yeah, right, sorry. 478 00:16:59,330 --> 00:17:00,730 My bad. 479 00:17:00,730 --> 00:17:05,450 So what I would do is that. 480 00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:08,921 - You're taking off the mayo? 481 00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:10,860 - Yeah, I'm benching the mayo. 482 00:17:10,860 --> 00:17:12,170 - You're benching the mayo? 483 00:17:12,170 --> 00:17:13,430 - Yup. 484 00:17:13,430 --> 00:17:14,730 - I'm the fucking mayo, aren't I?! 485 00:17:14,730 --> 00:17:16,520 - Yup, you're the fucking mayo. 486 00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:21,300 (fist thuds) (mayonnaise splats) 487 00:17:21,300 --> 00:17:24,000 Right, Holli, you're off the team. 488 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,990 You're not part of the squad, you're not a sub, you're gone! 489 00:17:26,987 --> 00:17:28,027 Get out of here! 490 00:17:28,030 --> 00:17:29,260 - Okay, right. 491 00:17:29,260 --> 00:17:31,770 I'm gonna hold that vote again now and you can't stop me. 492 00:17:31,770 --> 00:17:34,360 Who wants me to take over as new manager? 493 00:17:36,590 --> 00:17:37,460 - Sorry, babe. 494 00:17:38,692 --> 00:17:41,692 (mayonnaise splats) 495 00:17:51,530 --> 00:17:52,850 - Okay, we haven't got much time, 496 00:17:52,850 --> 00:17:54,880 so we're gonna work hard for the next couple of days, 497 00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:56,880 and we're gonna keep it to the three basics: 498 00:17:56,880 --> 00:17:59,150 tackling, diving and trash-talking. 499 00:17:59,150 --> 00:18:00,250 - What's trash-talking? 500 00:18:00,250 --> 00:18:01,360 - It's kinda like when someone from West Mount 501 00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:04,140 is about to take a free kick, you go up to them and say, 502 00:18:04,137 --> 00:18:06,667 "your mum gives blow jobs behind Lidls" to put them off. 503 00:18:06,670 --> 00:18:08,230 - But what if it's not true? 504 00:18:08,230 --> 00:18:10,960 - Come on, it's West Mount, it's a 50/50 chance. 505 00:18:10,960 --> 00:18:13,540 - It doesn't matter if it's true, just abuse them. 506 00:18:13,540 --> 00:18:15,190 - Your mum does it with hamsters. 507 00:18:15,190 --> 00:18:16,020 - Nastier. 508 00:18:16,023 --> 00:18:17,753 - Your mum does it with ugly hamsters. 509 00:18:17,748 --> 00:18:19,548 - Ruder! - Your mum gives blowjobs 510 00:18:19,553 --> 00:18:20,893 to fat hamsters! 511 00:18:24,210 --> 00:18:26,510 - Your homework is to work on better cusses. 512 00:18:26,510 --> 00:18:29,640 Now, I'm gonna give you a diving masterclass. 513 00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:32,150 When you dive, it's got to look like you've really tripped. 514 00:18:32,150 --> 00:18:33,750 Viva's gonna give you a demo of this, 515 00:18:33,750 --> 00:18:35,510 and this is what it needs to look like. 516 00:18:36,548 --> 00:18:38,608 (kick thuds) - Ow! 517 00:18:38,610 --> 00:18:39,580 - Did everyone see that? 518 00:18:39,580 --> 00:18:41,130 - I need a plaster. 519 00:18:41,130 --> 00:18:42,630 - That's it, girls, but when you fall, 520 00:18:42,630 --> 00:18:43,810 you've got to commit to it. 521 00:18:43,810 --> 00:18:45,360 Really commit. 522 00:18:47,247 --> 00:18:48,467 (kick thuds) (Jade groans) 523 00:18:48,470 --> 00:18:50,060 - Good work, Jade, that's what I'm talking about. 524 00:18:50,060 --> 00:18:51,610 - I think I've broke my ankle. 525 00:18:51,610 --> 00:18:52,440 - That's great. 526 00:18:52,443 --> 00:18:53,493 Really lay it on. 527 00:18:53,490 --> 00:18:54,860 Maybe you've broken both ankles. 528 00:18:54,860 --> 00:18:56,230 - Think she's really hurt. 529 00:18:56,230 --> 00:18:58,020 - No, this is what you all need to do, 530 00:18:58,020 --> 00:18:59,350 go massively over the top. 531 00:18:59,350 --> 00:19:00,340 - I'm really fucking hurt. 532 00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:01,440 - Of course you are, Jade. 533 00:19:01,440 --> 00:19:03,950 Have a penalty, you're my star pupil. 534 00:19:03,950 --> 00:19:05,920 Ooh, you've got a bit of blood there. 535 00:19:05,921 --> 00:19:07,351 - Blood? 536 00:19:07,350 --> 00:19:09,770 (Jade sighs) 537 00:19:10,810 --> 00:19:12,560 - Very tricky without Saz and Jade. 538 00:19:14,059 --> 00:19:16,889 (kick thuds) - Ow! 539 00:19:19,098 --> 00:19:21,768 (elegant music) 540 00:19:25,156 --> 00:19:28,106 (Brandon sighs) 541 00:19:28,110 --> 00:19:30,390 Why did she have to die without ever knowing 542 00:19:30,390 --> 00:19:33,280 her long-lost love actually lived next door? 543 00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:34,410 - I don't know, hon. 544 00:19:34,410 --> 00:19:36,380 Sometimes, life's just sad. 545 00:19:36,382 --> 00:19:37,382 - I'm going. 546 00:19:38,390 --> 00:19:40,440 - Goodnight, Junior. - Night, Junior. 547 00:19:41,910 --> 00:19:43,550 Now that your mum's coming back, 548 00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:45,150 we won't see much of each other. 549 00:19:47,430 --> 00:19:48,860 - I want to ask you something. 550 00:19:48,860 --> 00:19:49,710 - Yes, Brandon? 551 00:19:51,188 --> 00:19:53,118 - Can you do me a couple of bags of washing? 552 00:19:53,120 --> 00:19:54,700 It turns out Junior's been leaving 553 00:19:54,700 --> 00:19:56,240 his dirty clothes under the bed. 554 00:19:56,239 --> 00:19:57,899 - What? - It proper stinks. 555 00:19:57,900 --> 00:19:59,230 But if you get in there quick, 556 00:19:59,230 --> 00:20:00,460 you can get it before he drops off. 557 00:20:00,460 --> 00:20:02,490 - I showed you how to work the washing machine. 558 00:20:02,490 --> 00:20:05,820 - Yeah, but I'm not good at remembering that kind of stuff. 559 00:20:06,690 --> 00:20:08,350 - My friends are right about you. 560 00:20:08,350 --> 00:20:09,410 You're a user. 561 00:20:09,410 --> 00:20:10,950 You're only nice to me when you want something. 562 00:20:10,950 --> 00:20:12,070 You're worst than Toggle. 563 00:20:12,070 --> 00:20:13,750 - Who? - Toggle, my dog 564 00:20:13,750 --> 00:20:14,840 from when I was little, 565 00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:16,890 only nice to me when he wanted a biscuit. 566 00:20:19,413 --> 00:20:22,213 (door slams) (fence rattles) 567 00:20:22,210 --> 00:20:24,520 - Hurt you very badly, hasn't he? 568 00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:25,750 - Yeah. 569 00:20:25,750 --> 00:20:28,130 Toggle wasn't really a kind dog. 570 00:20:28,130 --> 00:20:30,400 - Amber, I'm talking about Brandon. 571 00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:32,180 - Oh, Brandon. 572 00:20:32,180 --> 00:20:35,070 Yeah, he hurt me, but the thing is, Viva, 573 00:20:35,070 --> 00:20:36,720 when you love a boy like I love Brandon, 574 00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:39,120 you can't just turn it off like a tap. 575 00:20:39,120 --> 00:20:40,850 - No, sure, but someone can decide 576 00:20:40,850 --> 00:20:43,300 not to be in a bad relationship. 577 00:20:43,300 --> 00:20:44,990 - But that's what I'm trying to tell you, Viva. 578 00:20:44,990 --> 00:20:47,880 You can't control being in love, no one can, 579 00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:50,830 even Katy Perry or Taylor Swift or you. 580 00:20:50,830 --> 00:20:51,990 - Meaning what? 581 00:20:51,990 --> 00:20:52,920 - You're the one who doesn't realize 582 00:20:52,917 --> 00:20:54,637 you're still mad on Rocky. 583 00:20:57,184 --> 00:20:58,024 - Rocky! 584 00:20:58,017 --> 00:20:59,147 - Rocky Mountains? 585 00:20:59,154 --> 00:21:00,454 - Look! 586 00:21:00,447 --> 00:21:01,857 - Rocky! 587 00:21:01,858 --> 00:21:03,528 Rocky, Rocky, Rocky! 588 00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:05,310 Oh, God. 589 00:21:06,858 --> 00:21:07,978 Oh, no! 590 00:21:07,977 --> 00:21:09,847 - What? - I'm an idiot! 591 00:21:09,850 --> 00:21:11,690 The world's been trying to send me a message 592 00:21:11,690 --> 00:21:13,620 and I haven't been listening. 593 00:21:13,620 --> 00:21:15,280 I've got to find Rocky. 594 00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:16,120 - Where are you going? 595 00:21:16,120 --> 00:21:16,950 We've got the match. 596 00:21:16,953 --> 00:21:18,253 - I need to find Rocky. 597 00:21:18,250 --> 00:21:19,760 - No need, he's coming. 598 00:21:19,763 --> 00:21:20,603 Rocky's coming! 599 00:21:20,596 --> 00:21:21,616 - [Rocky] I've been looking for you. 600 00:21:21,620 --> 00:21:24,350 - You wanted Rocky and he appeared. 601 00:21:24,350 --> 00:21:25,450 OMG, it's destiny. 602 00:21:25,450 --> 00:21:27,350 - Can you give us some privacy, girls? 603 00:21:31,840 --> 00:21:33,370 - It's our big game today. 604 00:21:33,370 --> 00:21:34,890 - And us. 605 00:21:34,890 --> 00:21:36,450 - I was gonna. - I wanted to. 606 00:21:36,449 --> 00:21:37,769 - [Rocky] We need to talk. 607 00:21:37,770 --> 00:21:39,130 - Yeah, we do. 608 00:21:39,127 --> 00:21:40,777 - You know, a lot of the football dudes 609 00:21:40,780 --> 00:21:42,720 have these little superstitions and shit. 610 00:21:42,720 --> 00:21:44,810 - Oh, yeah, the girls are the same. 611 00:21:44,810 --> 00:21:47,900 - Okay, so before we split up, 612 00:21:47,900 --> 00:21:52,040 my little superstition was always to like, kiss you, 613 00:21:52,040 --> 00:21:53,900 last thing before I went and got changed for a match. 614 00:21:53,900 --> 00:21:55,130 - Oh, Rocky-- 615 00:21:55,133 --> 00:21:57,653 - But, since I stopped doing the little kissing thing, 616 00:21:57,650 --> 00:21:59,580 I haven't scored a single goal. 617 00:21:59,580 --> 00:22:01,740 It's even got me doubting my own talent, 618 00:22:01,740 --> 00:22:04,550 like I'm bad at football or something. 619 00:22:04,550 --> 00:22:07,150 - So you need to kiss me? 620 00:22:07,150 --> 00:22:08,040 Is that what this is about? 621 00:22:08,037 --> 00:22:09,347 - You don't mind? 622 00:22:09,350 --> 00:22:10,820 'Cause I thought with us being like 623 00:22:10,820 --> 00:22:13,720 four million percent finished, you wouldn't... 624 00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:15,890 It would be a no-tongues deal, obviously. 625 00:22:15,890 --> 00:22:18,370 I just need to-- - Rocky, kiss me. 626 00:22:19,210 --> 00:22:20,300 I mean, it's fine. 627 00:22:30,030 --> 00:22:31,520 - Okay. 628 00:22:31,518 --> 00:22:33,108 That's that done. 629 00:22:33,110 --> 00:22:34,160 Hope it works. 630 00:22:35,090 --> 00:22:36,490 Gemma's waiting for me. 631 00:22:36,490 --> 00:22:38,430 She's a bit jealous of you. 632 00:22:38,430 --> 00:22:39,920 - You're seeing someone else? 633 00:22:39,920 --> 00:22:40,990 - Yep. 634 00:22:40,990 --> 00:22:42,460 Moving on like you wanted. 635 00:22:42,460 --> 00:22:43,470 Good luck today, yeah? 636 00:22:43,470 --> 00:22:45,600 And thanks for the, you know. 637 00:22:46,467 --> 00:22:49,047 (lively music) 638 00:22:58,099 --> 00:23:00,849 (toilet flushes) 639 00:23:02,728 --> 00:23:04,608 - [Amber] Holli, why are you only wearing two bras? 640 00:23:04,605 --> 00:23:06,055 - One of my bras is missing. 641 00:23:06,056 --> 00:23:07,176 Don't know what happened to it. 642 00:23:07,184 --> 00:23:09,774 (lively music) 643 00:23:12,313 --> 00:23:13,153 Don't tell anyone, 644 00:23:13,146 --> 00:23:15,446 I want everyone believing everything's fine. 645 00:23:15,450 --> 00:23:17,000 Shit, where are your lucky boots? 646 00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:18,860 - Oh, that's a weird story. 647 00:23:18,860 --> 00:23:21,350 I put them outside the backdoor, 'cause they smelt nasty, 648 00:23:21,350 --> 00:23:22,830 and a fox went toilet in them. 649 00:23:22,830 --> 00:23:24,060 It's absolutely true. 650 00:23:24,060 --> 00:23:25,240 - But you've still got them, right? 651 00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:26,120 - Yes. 652 00:23:26,120 --> 00:23:27,600 Yes. 653 00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:28,490 And no. 654 00:23:28,490 --> 00:23:29,360 - Which? - No. 655 00:23:29,360 --> 00:23:32,040 - Amber! - My mum threw them away. 656 00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:34,410 - Oh, my god, Ria's eating a Crunchie. 657 00:23:34,410 --> 00:23:36,230 So is Shannabelle and Jade. 658 00:23:36,230 --> 00:23:37,980 - The vending machine was out of Kit Kats. 659 00:23:37,980 --> 00:23:39,150 - This is bad. - Maybe I could try 660 00:23:39,150 --> 00:23:40,140 to do the three-wee thing. 661 00:23:40,140 --> 00:23:41,660 - Don't be dumb, that's Saz's thing. 662 00:23:41,660 --> 00:23:43,500 - Okay. - Maybe worth a try. 663 00:23:43,500 --> 00:23:44,330 - Well, actually I just went wee, 664 00:23:44,333 --> 00:23:46,633 don't think I can go again. 665 00:23:46,630 --> 00:23:47,820 There's a complete lack of urine 666 00:23:47,820 --> 00:23:49,220 in my bladder at the moment. 667 00:23:50,485 --> 00:23:51,345 (clapping) 668 00:23:51,350 --> 00:23:52,510 - Okay, good luck, everyone. 669 00:23:52,510 --> 00:23:55,800 And one last piece of advice: Don't forget girls have boobs. 670 00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:57,750 Elbow them in the boobs if you get the chance. 671 00:23:57,750 --> 00:24:00,300 It really hurts, unless you're wearing three bras. 672 00:24:00,300 --> 00:24:02,270 Okay, sisters, it's time. 673 00:24:02,272 --> 00:24:04,862 (lively music) 674 00:24:15,990 --> 00:24:18,070 (grunts) 675 00:24:20,542 --> 00:24:22,792 - Don't wanna play, I don't feel good. 676 00:24:22,790 --> 00:24:23,620 - You're playing. 677 00:24:23,623 --> 00:24:27,033 We're already minus Saz and Jade is, like, so crippled. 678 00:24:27,033 --> 00:24:28,693 - Sazzy! 679 00:24:28,692 --> 00:24:29,862 Yay, yay, yay! 680 00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:32,790 - You're back, then? 681 00:24:32,793 --> 00:24:33,633 - Yes, Coach. 682 00:24:33,626 --> 00:24:35,816 When you're in a team, you have to fucking play, 683 00:24:35,820 --> 00:24:38,120 even though everyone in the team hates you, Coach. 684 00:24:38,120 --> 00:24:40,530 - Well, if you're making the effort, I suppose I have to. 685 00:24:40,530 --> 00:24:41,730 - What's the matter? 686 00:24:41,730 --> 00:24:42,740 Is it Rocky? 687 00:24:42,740 --> 00:24:43,940 - I've lost him forever. 688 00:24:45,010 --> 00:24:45,850 He's seeing Gemma. 689 00:24:45,850 --> 00:24:46,840 - Gemma?! 690 00:24:46,840 --> 00:24:48,020 She's really pretty. 691 00:24:48,020 --> 00:24:49,900 - Really beautiful, and clever. 692 00:24:49,900 --> 00:24:51,640 - She can drive and her car is well flash. 693 00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,740 - And apparently she gives fantastic head. 694 00:24:56,276 --> 00:24:57,826 Don't know how I know that. 695 00:24:57,830 --> 00:24:59,700 - Yeah, well, you still have to play football. 696 00:24:59,700 --> 00:25:01,580 We'll all get pissed and cry later. 697 00:25:01,579 --> 00:25:04,579 (upbeat rock music) 698 00:25:18,803 --> 00:25:19,893 - They look angry. 699 00:25:19,890 --> 00:25:21,390 - It's all part of their act. 700 00:25:21,390 --> 00:25:23,400 They look angry, we look angry. 701 00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:24,960 - We're all gonna get murdered. 702 00:25:24,960 --> 00:25:26,810 - Hopefully, they'll target Holli first. 703 00:25:29,678 --> 00:25:31,608 (whistle shrills) 704 00:25:31,607 --> 00:25:34,357 (girls shouting) 705 00:25:40,248 --> 00:25:41,748 - [Girl] Fuck you! 706 00:25:44,498 --> 00:25:47,328 (whistle shrills) 707 00:25:51,975 --> 00:25:53,075 (whistle shrills) 708 00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:55,820 - Five-nil, it's not that bad, we can come back from that. 709 00:25:55,815 --> 00:25:58,145 Look what happened last week, we scored nine goals. 710 00:25:58,150 --> 00:26:00,070 - Why don't we just forfeit the game and go for ice cream? 711 00:26:00,070 --> 00:26:01,260 - Because we're not quitters. 712 00:26:01,264 --> 00:26:02,394 What aren't we?! 713 00:26:02,390 --> 00:26:04,370 - Quitters. - I said, what aren't we?! 714 00:26:04,374 --> 00:26:05,944 - Quitters! - Who are we?! 715 00:26:05,941 --> 00:26:07,441 - Winners. - Amber. 716 00:26:08,500 --> 00:26:10,270 - And don't forget to trash talk them. 717 00:26:10,270 --> 00:26:11,640 Making them give away penalties 718 00:26:11,640 --> 00:26:13,520 is most probably our best chance. 719 00:26:13,515 --> 00:26:14,345 (clapping) 720 00:26:14,348 --> 00:26:16,928 (mellow music) 721 00:26:35,866 --> 00:26:38,446 (lively music) 722 00:27:00,712 --> 00:27:03,302 (group cheers) 723 00:27:05,093 --> 00:27:07,993 - Your mama's so fat, when she eats a Mars, she eats Mars! 724 00:27:08,892 --> 00:27:11,062 You know, like the planet. 725 00:27:12,384 --> 00:27:14,974 Your mama's so fat, one of her boobs speaks fluent Welsh, 726 00:27:14,973 --> 00:27:18,643 because she's so wide, one of her boobs is in Wales! 727 00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:20,240 Wales is next to England, right? 728 00:27:22,315 --> 00:27:23,755 - Hey, bitch, your mama's so fat, 729 00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:25,160 her chair committed suicide. 730 00:27:26,420 --> 00:27:28,240 (punch thuds) (whistle shrills) 731 00:27:28,239 --> 00:27:29,909 - [Referee] Penalty! 732 00:27:31,349 --> 00:27:32,319 - [All] Sazzy! 733 00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:33,230 Sazzy! 734 00:27:33,228 --> 00:27:34,248 Sazzy! 735 00:27:34,248 --> 00:27:35,138 Sazzy! - Five-five with only 736 00:27:35,143 --> 00:27:38,433 two bras, two wees, three Crunchies, and no lucky boots. 737 00:27:38,430 --> 00:27:40,210 Think what we could have done on a good day. 738 00:27:42,150 --> 00:27:42,980 - What do you want, Brandon? 739 00:27:42,983 --> 00:27:44,233 I'm not talking to you no more. 740 00:27:44,229 --> 00:27:45,269 You're an idiot. 741 00:27:45,270 --> 00:27:47,490 - I'm sorry, you're right. 742 00:27:47,490 --> 00:27:50,180 My mum's back and I wanna say thank you for all your help. 743 00:27:50,180 --> 00:27:52,720 We could go to a film or go for a meal 744 00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:54,120 or do whatever you wanna do. 745 00:27:57,250 --> 00:28:02,250 (Amber panting) (Brandon panting) 746 00:28:05,217 --> 00:28:06,297 (Amber squeals) 747 00:28:06,297 --> 00:28:07,327 (Amber laughs) 748 00:28:07,325 --> 00:28:08,505 (Brandon groans) 749 00:28:08,507 --> 00:28:10,237 - My baby's coming! 750 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:11,770 My baby's coming! 751 00:28:11,773 --> 00:28:12,943 (Amber laughs) 752 00:28:12,939 --> 00:28:15,759 ♪ People keep saying that I'm doing it wrong ♪ 753 00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:18,530 ♪ But I say it feels all right ♪ 754 00:28:18,531 --> 00:28:23,531 ♪ I really do try, really do try, really do try ♪ 755 00:28:24,018 --> 00:28:27,108 ♪ There's a million things that I could change ♪ 756 00:28:27,109 --> 00:28:29,959 ♪ But maybe it's all right ♪ 757 00:28:29,957 --> 00:28:32,967 ♪ 'Cause this is my life, this if my life, this is my life ♪ 758 00:28:32,971 --> 00:28:34,981 ♪ People keep saying that I'm doing it wrong ♪ 759 00:28:34,984 --> 00:28:36,794 ♪ It's gonna be fine ♪ ♪ People keep saying ♪ 760 00:28:36,794 --> 00:28:38,524 ♪ That I'm doing it wrong ♪ 761 00:28:38,524 --> 00:28:40,664 ♪ People keep saying that I'm doing it wrong ♪ 762 00:28:40,655 --> 00:28:42,465 ♪ It's gonna be fine ♪ ♪ People keep saying ♪ 763 00:28:42,467 --> 00:28:45,967 ♪ That I'm doing it wrong ♪ 52910

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