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[dramatic music]
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♪ ♪
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‐ Hmm.
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Secret Agent Brock Mason.
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‐ Yeah, he's a dick.
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All right, so you're
gonna go down there,
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and you're gonna kill him.
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‐ Consider it done.
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I will go down there,
seduce him,
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take him back to my room,
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and after we have ravaged each
other for hours‐‐
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‐ Wait, wait, wait.
What? No, no, no, no.
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You don't have to have sex
with him.
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You're just gonna go down
and kill him.
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‐ Da, right after
we make fuck.
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‐ No, no. I‐‐I don't want him
to make any fuck.
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I want him to be dead.
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‐ Trust me, he will be easier
to disarm
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if he is naked.
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‐ Yeah, but you'll be
naked too.
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‐ Fuck yeah, I will.
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I am at my most effective
when I am nude.
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‐ Yeah, well,
so is Brock Mason.
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If you don't believe me,
you can ask my [bleep] wife.
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‐ [laughing] Da.
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Yeah, that is good one.
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‐ What?
‐ Oh, is‐‐isn't a joke?
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‐ No. Oh, no, no, he's‐‐
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he's actually fucking my wife.
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‐ Oh, snap.
Really?
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‐ Yeah.
That's why I want him dead.
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‐ Whoa, that is fucked.
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‐ So, can you just not have sex
with him?
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‐ Mmm, no, but how about this?
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I go down there, quick blowjob
in the bathroom,
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then I kill him.
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‐ No, no, no blowjobs.
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‐ Okay. Then, I jerk him off
under the table.
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‐ No.
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‐ You want him to jerk
himself off on my tits?
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‐ Why does killing him have
to involve him cumming?
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‐ Listen.
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How can you know that the man
is dead
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until you have seen him
truly live?
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‐ Okay. I know you think
that sounds smart,
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but that's the dumbest fucking
thing I've ever heard.
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‐ Mmm. You know, actually,
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the dumbest thing
I've ever heard
49
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was that a man stayed
in a marriage
50
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while he knew she was fucking
this other guy.
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00:02:00,354 --> 00:02:01,864
‐ I know, I know.
I'm well aware. I'm well aware.
52
00:02:01,855 --> 00:02:03,915
‐ Well, we will just see
what happens.
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‐ Okay. Please don't have sex
with him, okay?
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Please, please.
55
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[suspenseful music]
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♪ ♪
57
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‐ [chuckling]
58
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Three Kings.
59
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‐ Huh.
Straight.
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all: Ohhhh.
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‐ [chuckles]
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Must be my lucky night.
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‐ Excuse me, gentlemen.
64
00:02:32,119 --> 00:02:35,459
Do you mind if I play with you?
65
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‐ And my luck just keeps
getting better.
66
00:02:38,458 --> 00:02:40,758
Ha, ha, ha.
‐ With me,
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men always get lucky.
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00:02:42,663 --> 00:02:44,703
‐ [chortling]
‐ Yeah.
69
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:46,368
‐ No, for God's sakes.
70
00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:49,166
‐ So, are you staying
in the hotel?
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00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:50,569
‐ Da, I am.
72
00:02:50,570 --> 00:02:53,640
But I have not yet decided
in whose room.
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‐ Ah.
‐ Mmm.
74
00:02:55,409 --> 00:02:57,479
‐ What?
‐ Mm‐hmm.
75
00:02:57,477 --> 00:02:59,977
‐ Heh.
‐ Mm‐hmm.
76
00:02:59,980 --> 00:03:01,210
‐ Ahh.
77
00:03:01,214 --> 00:03:03,824
‐ Poison his fucking drink.
It's right there.
78
00:03:03,817 --> 00:03:06,587
Come on!
Oh wait,
79
00:03:06,586 --> 00:03:08,816
is she‐‐
80
00:03:08,822 --> 00:03:10,592
and she's jerking him off.
81
00:03:10,590 --> 00:03:12,690
‐ [chuckling]
82
00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:14,093
‐ I must say,
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00:03:14,094 --> 00:03:18,674
you exceed expectations,
Secret Agent Brock Mason.
84
00:03:18,665 --> 00:03:19,825
‐ Oh!
85
00:03:19,833 --> 00:03:21,673
Secret Agent Brock Mason.
86
00:03:21,668 --> 00:03:23,468
‐ You're the guy who killed
my brother.
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00:03:23,470 --> 00:03:24,940
‐ You told me your name was
Jeff!
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00:03:24,938 --> 00:03:26,638
‐ Uh‐oh.
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[gunfire]
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‐ How the hell did you
know my real name?
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‐ Doesn't everybody?
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00:03:33,346 --> 00:03:36,616
‐ No. I'm a secret agent.
I use code names.
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‐ I let you borrow my
swimsuit for the pool, Jeff!
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‐ [grunts]
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All right.
You stay here where it's safe.
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I'll take care of these guys.
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‐ [scoffs]
I can protect myself.
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‐ Oh, I am so gonna
fuck you.
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00:03:52,165 --> 00:03:54,895
[all shouting]
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00:03:59,473 --> 00:04:00,843
‐ Let them kill him!
101
00:04:00,841 --> 00:04:03,141
Just fucking let them kill him.
102
00:04:05,812 --> 00:04:08,182
That's it.
You want something done,
103
00:04:08,181 --> 00:04:09,721
you gotta do it yourself.
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00:04:11,852 --> 00:04:13,652
‐ Come on. Come on!
105
00:04:16,022 --> 00:04:18,992
‐ All right. Time to‐‐
106
00:04:18,992 --> 00:04:20,932
oh, sorry, sorry.
107
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:22,757
I guess you already got this
thing handled.
108
00:04:23,630 --> 00:04:24,700
Never mind.
Never mind.
109
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Good job.
Great job.
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‐ [grunts, gasps]
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both: Whew!
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‐ Whoo!
[laughs]
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That was awesome.
All right.
114
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I mean, I blacked out there
for a little bit,
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but, wow.
116
00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:41,723
‐ Okay. Now, you choke me
for a little while,
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00:04:41,715 --> 00:04:44,215
while I slap you in the face
with this glove.
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‐ All right.
Ha, ha.
119
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:48,917
This is turning out to be
a great fucking Thursday.
120
00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:51,930
‐ And so, Diary,
today I learned
121
00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:54,255
not to judge a book by
its cover.
122
00:04:54,261 --> 00:04:57,461
While my assassin may have
some unusual tactics,
123
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,604
she certainly gave Brock Mason
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00:04:59,599 --> 00:05:01,539
exactly what he deserved.
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00:05:06,773 --> 00:05:29,963
‐ [sighs]
8560
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