All language subtitles for Ben.And.Kate.S01E07_English

Coming back.
Nice, nice and slow.

Looking good.
(chuckles)

What is she doing?

She's flirting
with your neighbor.

Ew, gross!
I just washed that car.

Help me... Oh!

Oh...
Ooh.

Did I just hit it?
Nope, no, it's fine.

This is like the saddest
mating ritual ever.

Okay, bye.

Bye.
Okay.

(singsongy):
Who wants bagels?!

I do! My name is Kate.

You got more bagels?
What is this, Yom Kippur?

BJ:
She's inventing reasons
to go out so she can

bump into Will.
She's taking it slow.

It's a plan she calls
"Operation..."

BOTH:
...Crock-Pot."

You cook it slow.
You flirt a little bit here,

you flirt a little
bit there,

and then three months later,
boom, it's done.

I'm ready to eat.
It's delicious.

I don't know
about this guy.

He's too, like,
Captain America.

Like, "Oh, I got
a square jaw."

"I've got white,
perfect teeth. You know,

they're straight."
Can't trust a guy like that.

No, I feel like I need to do
some recon on the guy.

See if he's worthy
of the Fox name.

I mean, he would obviously
be taking your name, right?

No recon, okay?
He's a really good guy.

And he's super sensitive.

On Halloween,
when I met him,

he practically cried
in front of me.

I could cry on Halloween.
I could cry right now.

Go on. Cry.

Cry right now.
Fine.

Okay, the death of jazz,
Iron Giant,

(voice breaks):
the possibility
of Iron Giant II.

The story about the elephant,
you know,

who forms an unlikely
friendship with a little dog.

Okay, starting over.

Mrs. West wanted me
to remind you about Career Day.

Oh, did she?

Career Day? What?

Where moms and
dads come to class

and talk about
their careers.

Thank you. I can read.

Wait. You didn't ask me
'cause I'm not your dad?

No, because you
don't have a career.
Wow.

(laughing)

(sniffling)

BJ:
What? Sorry.

I was just thinking
about the...

the dog and the elephant

and how they're friends,
and it's just,

it's really sweet
because one's so big,

the other one's so little.

And, like, really
unexpected because...

'cause of the different sizes.

Sorry.

* Wake up, look around

* There's a feeling today

* Fall down, get up again

* Get in the game

* Hey, hey, hey

* We're all here anyway.

All right, so this is

my competition for
Career Day, huh?

I can totally
take these guys.

What's that guy do?
He's a pilot.

Oh, well, that's not fair.
I mean, that's awesome.

What about this one?
What's this dad do?

He has a landscaping business.
Slash?

That's it.
That's it?

No landscaper/
herbalist/mushroom hunter?

You don't have to come
to Career Day.

You can come
to the ice cream social.

Is that all
I am to you,

just someone to be social with
over a frozen dessert?

No, I will be at
that Career Day,

Maddie, okay, with a career
and everything, I promise you.

It's in two days.
No problem.

But, you know,
definitely put me down

for that ice cream thing, okay?
Plus two.

Ooh, ooh, ooh, I got to do
some recon for your mom.

Go, uh, find a book
or something.

Hey, Will!

Willy! Bill!

Billiam!
Hey.

Kate's brother, right?

Yeah, man.
Hey.

This is my daughter Shelley.

Ah, hi, Shelley.

That's an
awesome name.

That's also an
awesome backpack.

Yeah, big fan of
bumblebees and flowers.

And purple. (chuckles)

So what kind of stuff
are you into, bro?

I really like where Will and I
are at-- the simmering stage.

You know, the lid is on,
the carrots are softening.

Hey, Kenny. Hello.

Did you see that?

See what?
Oh, that face!

No.
Since I got the raise,

he has been giving me
a lot of attitude.

Maybe that's because
you're late every day.

And you also don't
actually ever do

any real work
when you're here.

And you just started
sleeping with the boss.

And now you.

You don't think that I should

maybe, like, turn the heat up
on Operation Crock-Pot?

How long has it been
since you had sex?

Couple months.

How many?
57.

You see, Maddie, every great
entrepreneur keeps a list

of potential business ideas
for the moment

when his niece
springs Career Day on him

at the last minute.

All right,
what do we got, Tommy?

Number one: revive
the American railroad industry.

Such a rock-solid idea.

Probably bigger
than a two-day thing, though.

Two: biodegradable cell phones.
I like that idea.

Why didn't we put a pin
in that?

We were unable to create
a prototype that made

or received phone calls.

Okay, okay, that makes sense.

Three: get the 200 crates
of wine from underground storage

and sell it to the
finest bistros.
Ooh.

Wait, what crates of wine?
You remember, summer of '95?

I had the tan of my life
working on that vineyard

in the south of France?

Ah, Veronique.
Who's Veronique?

She, uh...
she was a woman friend of mine.

A French woman,
if you must know.

And we made wine together.

After her husband
died...

later, to be determined
by natural causes, obviously,
Yeah.

she sent me crates of wine

as a reminder
of our time together.

You know, this might be
worth something.

The ladies down
at the country club

are always talking
about "wine o'clock."

This is a good idea.
This is a really...

I like the way this feels,
Tommy, you know?

I could see us
in the spirits game.

Is that where you hunt ghosts?

(chuckles)

Get out.

I'm serious.
Get out of here.

You get out
of here.

It's like she's
not even listening.

(glass breaks)

Where did this come from?

And don't say you found it,

because I will not
testify on your behalf.

Hello. Ben Fox,
local wine merchant.

Wine merchant?
Dude, don't let Maddie's thing

get in your head, okay?

Nothing's in my head.
I'm excited by it, you know?

Will thought it was
a good idea, too.

Will?
Yeah, I talked to him.

You know, just suss him out
just like we talked about.

No, that's not what...
I specifically said no sussing.

Do not suss.

Relax, okay?
He seems like a good guy so far.

But I need to see the two
of you guys together.

Absolutely not
under any circumstances ever.

Hypothetically.
Okay, let's just say,

you know, he came over
with some ground beef, you know,

and I added my signature
blend of spices

and we threw it on the
grill and the three of us,

you know, spend some
quality time together.

No, that sounds like
the worst thing in the world.

Okay, sort of starting to think

that maybe you're not into
the hypothetical.

No.

So what if it was happening
in real time?

WILL:
Oh, hey, Kate.

Hey!

I got the grill going.

Will's here! Yay!

Hi. I'm Will.

I'm Kate.

Did I buy way too
much meat? I thought

there was gonna
be more people.
Oh, yeah, no, no.

There's a ton
of neighbors coming

to this impromptu
nighttime barbecue.

Yeah, probably just
running late, you know?

(chuckles)
Ever done any time, Will?

KATE: Oh, my God, that is
so funny. He means, like...

like, "What's the craziest thing
you've ever done?"

You know, like a fun question
to ask at parties.

Me and my buddies
went streaking in

downtown San Antonio
after our swim team won State.

So, naked-naked swimmers
in the street?

Public indecency, yeah.
Not off to a great start, Will.

So what do you do when you're
not flapping about?

Well, I'm a social worker
for at-risk youth.

Slash...?
That's it.

Oh, sounds a lot
like charity work.

But good for you.

Me, I am in the wine business.

As of, like, an hour ago.

And this haughty
but accessible number

goes by the name
"Veronique."
Hmm.

Yeah, it's got flavors
of cherry and cigar and bark.

Bark?
Yeah, hints.

Here we go.

Top you off.

Cheers to, uh...
to getting to know you.

The real you.

Eye contact?

Ben, that's not...
Shh...

Hold it.

Okay.

Uh-huh.

(slurping)

I'm really sorry
that nobody else showed up.

I think everybody
hates me.

Or maybe it's
because your brother

invented a fake
night barbecue

just to get
me over here.

What?!
Just saying.

That's crazy.
Only a complete lunatic

would do something
like that.

(both chuckle)

Yeah, yeah, you're right.
Everybody probably hates you.

I'm glad I finally got
a chance to hang out with you.

Me, too.

I'd love to take you out
for a proper meal.

Maybe tomorrow night?

Yeah. Yes.

That would be great.
Yeah?

I could be here by 7:00.

Then that is when
I will see you

with my looking balls.

Okay.

Okay.
Good night.

Good night.

Kenny, I'm still waiting
on the order for table five.

Kenny, stop being a child.

Kenny, Kenny, Kenny.

Kenny! Kenny!

Kenny-Kenny-Kenny-
Kenny-Kenny-Kenny-

Kenny-Kenny-Kenny-Kenny-
Kenny-Kenny-

Kenny-Kenny-Kenny-Kenny-Kenny-
Kenny-Kenny-Kenny.

(gasps)

What? Skinned my shoulder!

So, I have you down
for zero cases of wine,

and I will never call
this number again.

Okay, bye.

Dude, this is ridiculous.
You've called every

wine bar in town
and not a single appointment?

This is a tough
industry to break into

especially if
you're an unknown.

Not unlike our experiences

with the clique-y world
of meteorology.

Oh! Dude, what are we gonna do?
I mean, what's our move here?

Maddie's Career Day
is right on my ass.

Want me to play the race card?
I'll do it.

I haven't played
it in so long.

I want to just get
in somebody's face

and be like, "Ah, you racist!"

I can be a old
black man:

"Boy, now, my son
came in there

"and you turned him away
'cause his skin color.

Let him get
people drunk!"

And I can be my uncle:

"Hey, man, you better
let my cousin,

my nephew get in
there and sell wine."

No, I feel like we should
hold onto it.
(doorbell rings)

Oh, boy.

Look at you. You're the
devil, you know that?

All right, what
do we got here?

You know what? Just take all
of it, you little pushers.

Take all of it!

Give me the cookies.
Get out of here.

Thanks again for
childhood obesity.

All right, where was I?

Oh, right.

How to sell wine
without any contacts.

We need to cut out
the middleman.
Exactly.

We go straight to the buyer.
Mm-hmm.

You know, streamline it.
Take it right to the people.

It's like we're
right on a precipice.
Edge on over.

We're right on
the edge of something.
I feel like we should...

First of all,
we got to leave the house.

Knock on the door and say,

"Hey, we have
something to sell."

All we have to do

is start
turning the knob slowly.

First of all, we just
head through the door

and go inside the house.

Customer's always right,
no matter what.
Now we're talking to people.

That's right. That's the way
you run a business.
Mm-hmm.

BOTH:
That is the way you run
a business.
Mm-hmm.

Oh, hi there.

Is your mom here?

(chuckles)
I'm just kidding.

I'm here for you, Mom.
(doorbell rings)

Who has time
to take care of the kids,

go to Pilates,
satisfy their husbands

and go to the
store to buy wine?

Right?
Not me.

I don't know about you,

but as soon as
my little one's

off to school,
I'm like, "Waiter!"

(laughing)

Yes.

What's happening?

What?

Let's party.
You know what I'm saying?

Okay.

In a strictly platonic way.

How are you?
My name is Ben Fox.
Yeah.

Just ignore him.

(giggles)

It's just become such
a hostile environment,

you know, at work.

Now Kenny's turned
the entire kitchen staff

against me.
I mean, have you ever

actually had a conversation
with any of these guys?

Yeah, I see your point.

Let's call this Operation
Reputation Rehabilitation.

Do we name too many operations?

Yeah.
Yeah?

Man.

Are you applying for an
adjustable rate mortgage?
I'll have you know

that I am revolutionizing
the adult beverage industry.

I'm throwing a little
wine tasting here tonight.

Is that what you're
wearing, or...

(knocking on door)
I'll get it.

Ben, no!
Kate...

I'm just gonna shake
the guy's hand. Okay?

Nothing weird.

You have my blessing, okay?
I don't need your blessing.

Well, too late.
Already been blessed.

Take it back, Ben.
Can't unbless.

Ben, stop.
Blessed!

Hey, Will.

Ben.
How are you?
Good to see you.

Is that what you're wearing?

KATE:
Here I come.

Please stop talking.
Okay.

All right, well...

Listen. Have a great time.

Thanks.
Yeah.

Listen to me
right now, okay?

You take care of her.

You treat her right.

Okay? She's not as
strong as she looks.

She spooks easy, so she needs
everything to be perfect.
O-Okay.

She's especially terrified
of people leaving her,

so if she even
smells that on you,

she will run, boy.
Okay.

She also hasn't been
with anybody physically

in a very long time.

So there's gonna be a
lot of pressure on that.

I don't want any details,
but just so you're aware of it.

You got it?

KATE:
Ready?
Okay.

Great.
Ready?

Are you ready?
Yeah, you bet.

Have fun with my sister.

You guys have
a great time!

Fasten your seat belts
and no texting, okay?

A lot of great people
die horrifically that way.

KATE:
Thanks, Ben.

This is really fun.
It's been a really long time

since I've had, like,
an actual adult night out.

You know?

Oh, I know. Yeah.

Not that there's any
pressure to make it adult.

I mean, who's to say what
"adult" means anyway?

(chuckles)

Would you excuse
me for a second?

I'm... I just got to
run to the bathroom.

Not that I'm running.

"Run" is a bad
choice of words.

I'm-I'm not gonna
really run anywhere.

As a matter of fact,
you know what?

I'm gonna go ahead and...
I'm gonna leave my watch.

And, uh... and
my wallet. Um...

Just hold onto that.
I will be right back.

Okay...

Sometimes, I want a time-out.

You know?
Sometimes I want my mommy juice,

and I don't want
to feel bad about it.

My secret weapon... voilà.

(gasps)
Wine-sicles.

Cold, refreshing,
alcoholic.

Hey, Ron.

Come pick me up.

I'm at a tasting.

Oh, Ben, you are so bad.

(laughs)

No more.
Okay.

Maybe a little more.
(laughing)
Oh! All right.

Yeah, I'm drunk.

You're fat. So what?

Let me talk to him.
Hey, bud.

Not to worry.
She's in good hands.

Super manly hands.

(laughing)

Can I talk to you?
One sec.

(laughing):
Oh, that was...

Be careful of
Joanne and Ron.

The belong to the
country club,

and I've seen
this game before.

Oh, she's just a flirt.
No harm, no foul.

I don't know.
I've seen her flirt

with a lot of guys, get
Ron hot under the collar,

and then they have sex
on the 15th green.

15th green?

That's got a steep break
to the right, doesn't it?

Real steep.

I think that's
part of the thrill.

Is your food okay?
Because, if it's not exactly

the way you like it, I can...

I can flag somebody down
without ever leaving the table.

Are you okay?
Yeah.

Uh...

Yeah, I'm sorry...

I'm acting weird.

It's just that I
talked to your brother,

and he-he told me that you...

have some issues.
I'm sorry, what?

He said that you
spook really easily,

and that it's been
a long while

since you've...
(high-pitched squeal)

I am so... that's
just so embarrassing.

But also, that is...
it's all true.

It's completely true.

Um... I do spook easily.

I do. That's why I never
called you after Halloween.

And I'm just not gonna comment
on the second half of that.

What you said earlier.

About the...

(makes squeaky bedspring noises)

So instead, you just...

showed up at the bagel place,
like, a million times

so we'd run into one another?

I just though it would
be easier for me

to just have a crush on you,

and I didn't
want it to become

the thing where
you'll just one day

be my future ex-boyfriend.

If we could just go back
to something you just said.

Um, what kind of crush
are we talking about here?

Like this, or like...
Mmm...

Bigger than that.

No. Are we talking
about a crush still?

I think it's pointless.
They all hate me.

And for some
inexplicable reason,

it hurts my feelings.

Mom says to be nice
to mean people.

I really wasn't expecting
a back-and-forth, Maddie.

And I love your mum,
but just so you know,

in this particular
issue, she doesn't

really know what
she's talking about.

I know.
You what?

There's this boy in my class
who won't stop teasing me.

So I said I was going to
come to his house

and hurt him in his sleep.

Yeah?
And now he doesn't
tease me anymore.

Mom thinks it's because
she talked to his mom, but...

Will you keep an eye
on her? Thanks.
Mm-hmm.

BJ:
Hey!

Guess what.

I don't care what you think
I did to get that raise.

I deserved it.

I am a decent person,
but next time you want to

bad-mouth me, you might not
want to go to sleep at night,

because while you're sleeping,

you might lose a finger.

Do you understand me, Kenny?

Do... you...
understand me, Kenny?

Yes. Yes, yes!

But my name...
my name is not Kenny.

What?

My name's not Kenny.

Your name is Kenny.
My name is Sam.

No, it's not.
Yes, it is.

That? That's Kenny.

He's Kenny.

You always call us the wrong
names, every single day.

Oh, that's...

Oh, that's what

the dirty looks...

'cause I was... yeah.

I thought you were judging me,

but I was just...
it was the stupid names.

When... I mean, we...
Isn't that funny?

Well, we all
still judge you.

Oh, shut up.

Shut your face, Kenny Sam.

(laughs)

I can't believe it.
I feel so much better.

Yeah. Well...

Night, Kenny, Sam.

I love you guys.

(whispering):
You most.

And don't be afraid to
open a bottle of Veronique

a couple of hours
before serving.

It only gets
better with age.

I know I don't need to
tell you that, Cheryl.

(laughing)
You're beautiful.

How merlot can we go?

Tommy!

I heard your sister
was going out

with that hot divorcé
from down the street.

Well, depends on your
definition of "hot."

I find him to be
too symmetrical.

Eerily so.

Is it hot to
leave your wife?

What? He left his wife?

Yeah. Last year, at Christmas.

I mean, not that
I was surprised.

How did your sister
hook up with him anyway?

Well, she just...

she, uh...

she... Me.

I did this.

You can't turn up
a Crock-Pot.

It's a slow-cooker.

It's not meant for extreme heat.

You know, you want the meat
to fall off the bone,

not get burnt.
Mm-hmm.

It's not your fault, honey.

Look, marriage is
a confining institution,

but... Ben?

Ben? Don't leave.

Oh, so that's Ben?

That's Mr. Wine Hands?

You're pathetic.

Oh, yeah. He's mad.

(giggles)

That wasn't bad for
an adult night out.

Well, let's see how
our adult night in goes.

Ooh...

Get out of my sister!
Oh, my God!

Ben, what are you doing?

Hey! Come here,
you son of a bitch!
BEN:
Hey, listen,

we're right in the middle
of a family thing, okay?
Who is that?

This isn't your house.
This isn't your house, Ben!

You trying to
get my wife drunk

and then take
advantage of her?

Oh, give me a break,
Joanne's husband.

If anything, I'm a pawn in
your weird sexual golf game.

Ben!
You wife is so
sexually aggressive,

I'm not even that
attracted to her.

Hey!
KATE:
Oh, my God!

(grunting)
WILL:
Easy, easy. Easy.

Relax. Relax.
All right?

Everybody just needs
to calm down for a second.

Okay? Breathe.

Thank you
very much, Will.

Now, why don't you tell us
why you left your wife?

What?
KATE:
What?

He's a leaver, Kate.

He left his wife.
At Christmas.

Christmas?

But that's when
families come together.

BEN:
I know, right?

He didn't even wait
till Boxing Day.

Wow.

All right.

Yeah, I left her
three weeks before Christmas.

Because she never
put our daughter first.

Well, you got to put
the kids first, yeah.

Really.
Who are you?

I am so sorry.

For all of this, okay?

Mostly this part of it.

So stupid.

But I'm sorry for everything.

It's... it's fine.
(cell phone chimes)

Oh, that's so nice.
Joanne sent a text

to see if I was okay.

Oh, and she also sent a picture.

(yells)
Whoa!

Well, that was actually

one of the most
embarrassing things

that's ever happened to me.

And the only reason why

I'm speaking to you
right now, Ben,

is because what
you did last night

actually turned out to be
kind of really amazing.

It did?
Yeah.

We talked about his divorce,

and our childhoods,

and things that we would've
never even gotten to for months.

That was my plan.
No, that was not your plan.

No. That was not my plan.

It was also not my plan

to be used as foreplay
by a crazy couple.

That should only
exist in the '70s.

MADDIE:
Uncle Ben!
Are you ready for Career Day?

Uh, sorry, Maddie, but you
have to have a career for that.

I tried to find
one for you,

but the truth is,

I still don't know what
I want to be when I grow up.

Well, then why don't you
go talk about that?

BEN:
You see, the thing is,

we can get hung up
on trying to figure out

exactly what our path is,

but you never really know.

You know?
I mean, look at me.

Did-did I make it rain
as a wine salesman?

Yeah, you bet I did.

I mean, I don't want to get into
amounts... $2,500, whatever.

The point is, I tried.

That's what you guys need to do.

You need to go out there
and try stuff.

And don't worry about
not succeeding.

Right?

Because trying
is succeeding.

Unless you're trying to fail,

in which case,

failing... then is succeeding.

Ah...

Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org

BEN:
Thank you guys.

Thank you. Yeah.

Uh, the point is...

You know what the point is?

If you don't want
to go to college...

Whatever. Don't go to college.

Screw it.

You want to, you know,
play grab-ass around Europe?

Go for it. I don't care.

My name is Ben Fox.

Questions?