Original subtitles

What are you doing? Stop it.

Don't hurt him.

You sick pervert, stop it.

Get away from her.

Gotcha.

Are you alright, kiddo? -My toys.

Let's go to the police.

H€Y

where are you going?

Hey!

That Recycle Man made me this toy.

Let go.

Let go. -Just let go.

We're just trying to help.

Easy as pie, trust me.

Let go.

What's wrong with you.

Hi.

Hi.

Get back here.

This guy,

never goes near the MRT,

sleeps in a tent at night.

Mad. Barking mad.

Mad.

You know him?

Remember the three M's of Ximending?

Movie,

Money,

Madness.

Brand new luxurious apartments

Why are we working so hard every day?

Paying employees with goods? Sue them.

Priceless phytoncides -How?

Luxury apartment, limited edition

Luxury phytoncide my ass.

They're charging for trees now?

I don't get it either.

All that la-di-da.

Just tricks to rip you off.

That's how you make big bucks,

Savvy?

Aye aye captain.

Running your own business is no picnic

Nothing like working in the office

all hearts and flowers

To make it in Ximending, you need to man up

Work tough, play tough

Cockroach!

Cut it, you blithering idiot.

What if Momo saw me like this

she'd never go out with me.

Still no luck? C'mon, Casanova.

Shut it,

what about your two-timer?

What two-timer?

Cut the crap. Everyone knows.

Oi, I thought you were my friend.

So much for sisterhood.

Precisely because I'm your pal.

Truce?

Maybe.

Your very own pillar.

Welcome to Tiger Lady Catwalk

This way, please.

Tell me what it's for.

I'm going on a blind date.

Lose the bag,

It makes you look weary

Wrong cardigan, too bohemian

Bangles make you look all thumbs

Worst of all

That bird's nest bun, just plain wrong.

So, you do hair, too?

It's your lucky day.

Just like that.

I've been asking around

Finally they told me to come here, they say

you're the best in Ximending

What's wrong with me? Hair? Style?

Or is it my clothes?

Please help me.

Make me look ravishing, desirable

I want to look good enough to eat.

I do feel very feminine now.

Duh, it's a blind date. You look fabulous.

Go take a look

Thanks.

Thanks.

Much obliged.

I thought you two were sisters

Mother and daughter? Nah.

I'd never have guessed

What now?

I look just the same

What's the difference?

What are you so excited about?

You look fabulous whatever you wear

So, just be yourself.

That's terrific

Fits like a glove

Thanks.

You won't regret this

Bravo, Amy

Thank you so much.

Do you like it?

Hello?

Do you like it?

Tigger, are you listening?

Do you like it? Tigger?

Did you hear mummy singing?

Sure I was, good job.

Were you listening to me?

I'm all ears. Shoot.

Remember Mr. Wang?

He said he's taking me to Malaysia.

Malaysia, fancy that!

Well done.

Mum

could you spend a little less this month?

What?

What did you say?

Anyway, I love you more than anything.

I'm so tired, mum. Can you sing that

Baby baby don't you cry

Hello? Are you still there?

Hey, that's my song.

That's mine, my turn.

Mum.

December 8th, 1977

"With five copies of film reels on my back"

Iran all the way from Cinema A to Cinema B

a 500 meters sprint

took me only 80 seconds.

3 min before the show started

Local Mafia sent their minions after me

Bish bash bosh, I sorted them out and

handed over the five copies of film reels

That's why the film playing in Ximending that day

was Dream of the Red Chamber starring Ivy Ling

Henceforth,

Nobody who's anybody in Ximending

could afford to snub the Hermes of Ximending

Five copies? Were they heavy?

Five copies of film reels, each weighing...

Damn it, I knew she'd never get it.

No idea what you're on about

Maintenance charge

Are you paying me?

Careful.

I do all the cleaning and scrubbing

Isn't that why you're paying me?

Mr. Hermes, she's together with me.

Do your maths and shut up.

Relax.

Ghostbusters, Bill Murray, 1984

You're too young to know him

But old enough to know me

Share the wealth! Share the wealth!

I'll deal with you later.

No one touch my money.

Pick them up. Hurry.

Get a griP-

Here comes the money.

Hurry.

Here comes the money!

Everyone get out of here.

Stop it. Everyone.

Stop it. Everyone.

Here comes the money!

Stop it. -Why? It's not your money.

It's dangerous.

Dangerous? And we're to blame?

You're barking up the wrong tree.

Barking up the wrong tree,

Righto!

You've all gone mad. Quick

There, get that.

You've all gone mad. Quick

You too

I'm mad.

Yes, I'm the money maniac.

XimenKing

used to be a secret agent

too many state secrets though

they locked him up

That's how he went mad

Never goes near a subway

Nor the underground MRT

Mad

King? XimenKing?

He's been like this

since I've known him.

What was he like?

Doesn't matter now.

King? Just some idle work-shy

good-for-nothing lazy git

No mystery there.

XimenKing?

That nutter used to be a stockbroker

and came that bubble burst thing

got busted

But...

That's why he's now money mad

King?

Excuse me..

Ah

He just touched me...

Leave me alone!

It's all yours

Thanks!

Hell?-

Landing.

Aren't we cheerful today

Got a slap on the wrist today

Feeling lenient?

Those are thugs, fruit knives and all.

Offlcer, have you actually busted anyone?

And there you are, picking on me.

“Pretend we've never met”, remember?

Good job, almost like you were in it with that mad King

Boo-hoo.

If Mum knew I was your bit on the side

I'd never hear the end of it

Nonsense. Not like I'm married.

Sorry, my bad. Cheer up.

Come to the hot springs with me

on my birthday then.

Your birthday?

When's that?

Are you taking the piss?

Silly, of course I remember.

You'd better do.

Of course I remember.

I wasjust teasing you.

Promise?

Promise?

Swear.

I swear.

What if you don't keep your promise?

Then I'll be damned.

Here comes the rain.

Make it rain, make it rain.

Come on in then

No? Come on.

C'mon, pick it up.

What are you doing?

Mind your own business.

I know where to find you.

Be my guest!

See ifl care!

What's wrong with you?

What's wrong with ME?

Knock it off!

Knock it off!

Sausage

why are you picking on him?

Suits me.

Suits you?

Knock it off.

Shove off! You're not my dad.

Doesn't mean I can't teach you manners.

Knock it off.

Mind your own business. -Leave him alone.

Bring it on, c'mon.

Let's go.

Bring it on, c'mon.

Let's go. -You tosser.

Why are you putting up with this?

I just wanted these bottles.

Now we're even.

King, what are you up to now?

Stop hovering.

Get your stuff and go.

You owe this to me.

Let's go.

My bottles.

Leave them.

Clean it up.

Why me?

Are you waiting for me to tidy up?

Where are you going?

Where are you?

Where the hell is he now

You live here?

Let me show you around

This is my room.

That's the living room.

And my big big garden.

Blue sky, green grass, phytoncides.

The True Miracle( advertising slogan)

You're a trip, aren't you?

Ample parking space.

A homing beacon for the weary soul

You made all these?

Hey, that T-shirt's mine.

I never knew people could live like this...

Mum.

Cheers.

It's me.

How much did you drink?

It was so hot in Malaysia.

You scared me.

That Mr. Wang is a big fat liar.

Datuk my ass, it's all for sale.

So I hopped on the next flight home.

Instant noodles again?

It's cheap.

Where's the money I gave you?

What have you got?

Goodie, you've got to eat ii: with chili peppers.

How long are you staying?

Mr. Wang's got ants in his pants

Saying he'd come fetch me soon

Come fetch me my ass.

Didn't you say he's a liar?

Scrumptious.

Heavenly.

Your birthday's coming

I've got this...

Wait

I'm having a birthday hot springs treat

But we could have dinner first.

Hot springs, great idea.

Mr. Chen, that spa guy who has

a hot springs hotel in Baitou

has been asking me to go.

Fooling around? Watch your back.

Fooling around?

I love you more than anything.

For real? This time?

Of course, bona-fide designer bag, look.

Look at that.

Look after your money,

and money will look after you.

So well.

Happy Mother's Day, mummy.

Thank you, Tigger.

Just the two of us now.

Just the two of us now.

Be a good girl and grow up.

I will.

You'll make lots of money

Lots and lots of money

We'll be able to buy a house

Mummy, I'll buy you a house.

Why not.

You'd better learn how to do this then

OK

Let me show you.

You'll make lots of clothes for lots of people

Got it?

Baby

Baby baby don't you cry

Tears are pearls

Losing too many you'll cry

Crying too much you'll lose

Be a good girl

Be my little princess

A mission impossible for you

Model for me, and spy on my boyfriend

What?

Get changed

A HEW Your

not bad

Good job.

Looking good

Something missing

Cool

Fight?

Wake up

King.

Let's take a look

Let's see

That's better. -Isn't it.

That's just his own clothes.

You're the best stylist in Ximending.

No.

You know the three M's of Ximending?

Nope

Don't you dare toss that banana peel.

Movie

money...

Now you're happy.

Suits me.

Cowardly custard everywhere.

What did Ijust say?

Cheers.

Wait till I'm done

You'll look like a little princess.

Late again, King.

Always late.

Sorry.

Let's start.

Let's take a break.

Careful

Sit

Isn't it fun?

Little Bro,

I hope the money I sent is enough.

The town mayor told me,

Over the past 20 years,

I've been taken for a fool

You're not my nephew at all.

You are just an imposter.

I told you. Several times.

You just wouldn't listen. -He's been conned?

Yes, someone's been pretending to be his nephew

writing to him, asking for money

King wrote all his replies for him

Stop staring at me.

I just wanted to say goodbye properly.

I'm glad to have met you.

This is the last time I'm sending you money.

I hope you'll find another uncle soon.

As for me?

I'm finally going to propose.

Propose?

I'm serious.

Lunch's ready.

Chop chop.

Coming.

Mind the steps.

Watch out.

Lunchtime.

Lunch is ready.

Tigger?

Tigger? It's your Duck Tongue.

I had to queue for ages.

Seriously

Lunch time.

Let's eat first.

Just leave it here.

Yum.

Allow me.

Come on, let's eat.

Want some of mine?

Thanks, I've got it.

Yummy.

Watch out. Slippery.

I know this doesn't look much

But it's very famous

Watch out.

Totally off the beaten track

You have to know your way

it's been here for ages

For generations

Incredible chili peppers

Yes

Oi.

Oi...

Go and find out that guy's name

that guy hanging out with my mum

Why don't you go yourself?

I can't, Mum would go mad.

Please.

Please.

Not bad.

Didn't I tell you?

We could come again.

Excuse me.

What's your name?

Lee Jen Sean, why?

If you don't want that

I'll have it.

That one, too.

That one, too.

That white one looks nice, too.

Yes, that embroidered one.

This one's still new.

And the jumper, too.

TWD $500.7

That's too much.

Let's say $300.

That's the best I can do, I'm afraid.

That's a rip-off, I'm a regular

$300 and you've got a deal

How about you buy a few more items and I'll...

No no no, I only want this.

Miss.

That tank top I bought last time?

My friend's going back to USA

and she wants one, too.

She'll pay good money for it

That's the one.

But it's the last one.

I'll have it then

$500 you say?

Yes

There you are.

Thanks. -Never mind.

No, wait

It's a deal.

Need a bag?

This will do. Thank you.

Thank you.

Come again soon.

How did you know about this place?

They're highly recommended.

She's the best style guru in town, really.

What do you want today?

She's a regular.

I see

Is this one OK?

Or try something else?

Try them on. Bring them back if they don't fit.

Thank you.

Bye.

Gosh, you must be knackered.

I've got you some fruits.

Come on

Been a long day.

And look at what I've got

Look at all these nice clothes

This one's even embroidered

Look at the color

for all occasions

They're all yours.

Thanks.

Now let's see

How much we've made today

Thank god I'm here today

What would you do without me

Bye, I'll be off now.

Mum...

What?

Have you had supper yet?

Of course I have.

I've been stuffing my face all day.

Remember, I love you more than anything

Eat your fruits.

Off now, bye.

I was with Tigger just now.

It's a busy day.

Thank God I was there.

Please enter your pin.

Please select service.

Please wait.

Transaction failed (insufficient funds).

What's the last movie you saw?

Tarzan.

Tarzan? How long ago?

Long enough.

Tarzan, 1999

my last animation movie.

What type of movie is your life?

Not the 'La Vita e Bella' kind of movie anyway

Bella vita...like heroes never die?

Villains never win.

Princess marries prince.

Happily ever after.

They buy a house, have kids

until one day

the sky falls down

and they lose everything

except loads of money

Loads of money, really?

What'd happen if you stop thinking about money?

I'd die from a stomachache.

Help me.

Guess what I do when I'm feeling down.

What?

What's that?

Dancing.

You call that dancing?

No rhythm at all.

It's just some warm-up exercise.

Hello?

Mum? Where on earth are you?

Weren't you taking me out to dinner?

I'm going to the hot springs later.

When are we having dinner?

Jolin's here, she's flying back to America tmrw

I'll go fetch you soon.

Alrighty, I'll wait.

This way, come through, careful.

It's not much, but you're in for a treat.

You always know where to go

Take a seat.

Excuse me, who are you?

Pardon?

Tigger

Who are you?

Tigger

What's this?

What are you...this is Mr. Lin.

Mr. Lin?

What about that Mr. Lee a few days ago?

And that Malaysian Datuk?

And Mr. Chen the Spa guy?

Any ideas how many there are before you?

Dinner? You're an idiot.

What are you doing?

What do you take me for?

What's up? Amy?

Nothing.

Mr. Lin is Jolin's husband.

What kind of daughter are you?

Ignore her. Let's sit.

What kind of mother are you?

Miniskirt. Heavy makeup.

Drinks like a fish, pissed all the time.

My mother? She does my hair everyday

She cooks for me. She cares about me.

She likes grey and white.

She hates perfumes.

Who the hell is Amy?

Where's my mother?

Amy...

Amy...

How can you be so selfish?

You have your life, your friends.

What do I have?

Ever since your father left

I have nothing lefl.

I have nothing lefl.

AmY

Shush, let's go.

You've still got me.

'Just the two of us now', didn't' you say?

I'll go catch the train myself

OK

Tigger, this is Manda, my girlfriend.

Girlfriend?

Fia ncée

my flancée.

Congrats.

Give me a minute

I'll call you tomorrow.

Why bother?

You have a fiancée. Why bother?

We've been through that.

I was just...

Ijust wanted to...

Who's that?

Friend.

Friend.

Thanks.

Stop it, Tigger, it's dangerous

Sit down, Tigger

Easy, easy-

XimenKing

XimenKing

Where is he?

What's wrong with this place?

You're drunk?

Yup, I spent all my money on drinks.

Go away

Why don't you go home?

You're too drunk. Shame on you.

Can you go one day without lecturing me?

A birthday present of sort?

Hot springs, I want hot springs.

What are you doing there?

What happened?

Tigger.

My mum came to see me yesterday

She brought me lots of treats

This morning, when I was taking her to the bus stop

I noticed how grey her hair was now

I...

I miss her so much.

Me too

Why are you crying?

Imiss my mum, too.

Tell me

Is my makeup ruined?

What's so funny?

You look hedious when you cry.

Stop it.

Such pretty fireworks!

We're so lucky!

That's amazing.

So pretty.

Isn't it for tomorrow? A preview for us?

We're the VIPs!

We're so lucky.

Spectacular!

Awesome!

Look, flowers, too.

Tigger.

Happy birthday,

Happy birthday!

Thank you everyone.

Thanks.

Everyone had me down for a villain

when I was actually doing everyone a favour

That's gratitude for you

The Swordsman, 1990.

The highest-grossing movie played here

any cinema that made big bucks was set on fire

This one? Burned twice.

And you think Troy was burned because of Helen.

I'm just squatting

a wealthy squatter who makes it rain money

throwing wads of cash in the air

Freaks.

Makes sense though

Freaky characters usually take the prize

but they never make blockbusters

unless along comes Cruella Deville

and turns the freak into a hero

You'll have nothing from me

I've recently reserved one of those

luxury condos round the corner

a little short on the down payment though

Make sure you don't do a runner

Or I'll have this little one and her grandma

or your bird and her pal to answer for you

Who are you kidding?

Ximending Batman now, aren't you?

Kiddo

ever heard of the Blue Phoenix?

Lots of little girls were crazy about her

Don't touch her.

Keep calm

Get him

Easy does it.

Don't panic.

There's an earthquake

Just stand near the pillar

or stand near a wall

we're safe here underground

Please calm down.

No need to panic.

Baby baby don't you cry

Baby baby don't you cry

tears are pearls

Losing too many you will cry

and marry a stupid oaf

Baby baby don't you cry

Where did you learn the song?

My mum taught me.

Is this your family?

When was the last time you saw them?

Why don't you tell me?

Maybe you'll feel better if you do?

I was doing just fine before you came along

You came uninvited

Life is never easy.

That doesn't mean you can just quit

or we might as well all just die in the earthquake

Do you know what you're talking about?

Do you know what you're talking about?

Holier-than-thou? I might be pathetic,

but at least I'm honest

Honest.

September 21, 1999.

The last time I saw them.

My wife, Jewel,

she loved to dress in white.

She also loved going to the cinema.

My daughter, Melly.

She was five.

She loved stories.

Bedtime stories.

She'd only sleep if] read her a story

That night

I had a business dinner

Jewel and Melly were home

suddenly, the earth started to shake

and I lost everything

except money

You are a fool.

All you see is money.

What would you like to eat tonight?

McDonald's!

McDonald's? Why?

Ice cream!

King

It's your lucky day.

Thank you.

Come again soon.

Bye Bye

Great

Ms Jane?

Ms Jane?

What's up?

What's wrong?

What is it?

He's gone.

You know my heart.

All the world is a stage

especially at the end of your life, when

both audience and players are about to exit

No show lasts forever

Ximending is a magical place

It captures all our sufferings

all in one place

You must go on singing

I'll always be here

nothing's gonna change my love for you

I'll always be there for you

Makes sense

Unduly deceased protagonist is usually the twist

White suit, perfect symbol

Perfect

Anyone seen King?

What do you want?

Itold him

If he should do a runner

I'd come find you

Scum.

What do you take us for?

Show me what you are then

Listen carefully,

This is the real world

Anyone who disagrees

Say it now.

Anyone

Get off me.

Get off me.

You there.

Ms Phoenix?

That's right, this is she.

You took a backhander 30 years ago

and set fire to your boss's theatre

That's what put you in jail

Now you're out

you become the biggest bully in XimenDing

Swindling money left, right and centre

Ifl hadn't put in a good word for you

Those thugs would have broken your leg

Excuse me

Tigger? The cops found King.

Tigger, hello?

King?

The money he's been throwing away is the compensation

He was buried underneath the rubbles for hours

That's why he can't stay indoors now

After they rebuilt the building,

he still won't go back

The guy King punched?

He got King to buy the house that collapsed.

Now he wants him to resign the contract

But King just won't sign it.

That's horrible.

How could he ever sign it?

He'll just need to sign the reconciliation paper for now.

Tigger

I'm sorry.

Ifl don't stop lying to myself,

nobody will be happy.

Christmas eve

Clara is given a Nutcracker soldier for Christmas

Midnight, the grandfather clock strikes 12

The Mouse King launches an attack

Suddenly, the Nutcracker comes to life

Mouse King is defeated and Clara is safe

The Nutcracker escorts Clara

to the Land of Sweets

Just when they begin to waltz

Clara awakens and finds herself alone

It's all been a dream

Clara starts crying,

and crYing

It's OK now.

King!

Stay away from me.

King? What do you want?

Come on.

Why don't you come join us?

UP You go.

Unbelievable

King's coming to the underground

I'll wait for you.

SorrY

sorrY

You can't go there.

Quick, someone!

SorrY

Give me that.

Give it to me!

30 years ago, my girlfriend was pregnant

but she wouldn't marry me unless I had money

one thing alter another

I ended up in jail, and she dumped me.

They told me she gave the baby

to a Chinese veteran in Ximending

I've been looking for him since

But how do I find him

when I don't even know his name?

No panic though.

I'm sure I'll find him one day.

My baby.

Daddy will buy you a house.

What do you say?

Movies are more exciting than real life

My ass.

Movies are nothing compared to real life.

Hell hath no fury like a man scorned

Hell hath no fury like a man scorned

Blue sky, green grass, phytoncides.

Luxury apartment, limited edition

How could anyone live like this?

Take a seat.

What are we doing here?

You have to sit down.

Sit down.

No I won't

I'm not sitting down.

I'm standing up.

Just sit down

Like what you did, feet first.

Just sit up and slide down.

I saw someone sliding down standing up, too.

That's a boy, but you're a girl

You're a little princess.

Come down, c'mon.

No.

Let's go home.

No.

What is it with you?

Just sit down, and slide down nicely.

Nobody loves me.

I must be a changeling.

Say what?

I must be a changeling

Says who?

We made you from mud.

Let's go home.

No.

No? You're staying here?

Who'll come fetch you?

Prince Charming.

Who? Prince Charming.

Stop laughing

Now now.

Prince Charming.

No no no it's too dangerous

No no no it's too dangerous

No I won't.

Sit down.

Sit down.

Easy does it

Mum

I'm sorry.

Thank you.

I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.

Don't say that.

Don't say that.

We mean it.

Tell Daddy

I love you Daddy

You'll never marry a stupid oaf

I'm tired.

Let's go home.