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1
00:00:01,078 --> 00:00:02,414
(Dog barks)
2
00:00:02,461 --> 00:00:03,561
(Shower splashes)
3
00:00:03,663 --> 00:00:05,630
Johnny: Moira! The water's ice cold!
4
00:00:05,731 --> 00:00:07,666
How long were you in here?!
5
00:00:08,030 --> 00:00:09,864
John, you know my ritual!
6
00:00:10,008 --> 00:00:12,610
Five to ten minutes
to let the water warm,
7
00:00:12,635 --> 00:00:13,820
there's the initial scrub,
8
00:00:13,845 --> 00:00:15,125
followed by the deep conditioner,
9
00:00:15,150 --> 00:00:16,851
which must set for 20 minutes,
10
00:00:17,015 --> 00:00:18,916
and finally, the double rinse cycle.
11
00:00:19,093 --> 00:00:21,127
Well, we can't be doing
that anymore, sweetheart!
12
00:00:21,152 --> 00:00:23,354
Our water bill is
going through the roof!
13
00:00:23,455 --> 00:00:26,790
Yes, painfully aware of our
budgetary constraints, John.
14
00:00:26,891 --> 00:00:30,503
I'm currently reading a
magazine from July, 1987.
15
00:00:30,528 --> 00:00:32,363
Where do you even find these?
16
00:00:32,464 --> 00:00:33,641
Alexis: So I just signed for this,
17
00:00:33,665 --> 00:00:35,165
so does that mean I get to keep it?
18
00:00:35,190 --> 00:00:37,659
- Also, what is it?
- Oh my God, it's here.
19
00:00:37,836 --> 00:00:39,922
- Give it some room, Alexis!
- Give what some room?
20
00:00:39,947 --> 00:00:41,681
What exactly are you getting
21
00:00:41,706 --> 00:00:44,041
shipped from "Harrod's of London?"
22
00:00:44,142 --> 00:00:46,170
Family, I'd like to you
to meet a dear friend
23
00:00:46,203 --> 00:00:48,154
whom I've yet to meet.
24
00:00:48,179 --> 00:00:52,016
Give a warm dobrodosli
to my red carpet gown
25
00:00:52,041 --> 00:00:53,775
for the "Crows" premiere.
26
00:00:53,921 --> 00:00:56,429
Moira, you didn't tell
me they'd set a date
27
00:00:56,454 --> 00:00:58,255
- for the premiere!
- Yes!
28
00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:01,076
I've been told
definitively it will happen,
29
00:01:01,101 --> 00:01:03,803
and I quote, "ideally
sometime this year."
30
00:01:03,828 --> 00:01:05,373
Okay, there must be some mistake here.
31
00:01:05,397 --> 00:01:07,798
This is valued at $3,700.
32
00:01:07,823 --> 00:01:11,177
What?! $3,700?
33
00:01:11,202 --> 00:01:13,303
What designer gave you
that kind of discount?
34
00:01:13,405 --> 00:01:15,806
Sadly, it's not custom
this time around, Alexis.
35
00:01:15,907 --> 00:01:18,075
Mommy had to shop off the rack.
36
00:01:18,176 --> 00:01:19,843
Fortunately, I discovered
something called
37
00:01:19,868 --> 00:01:23,256
- a "promo code."
- This is a reduced price?
38
00:01:23,281 --> 00:01:25,367
Yes. Discount couture,
do you believe it?
39
00:01:25,392 --> 00:01:27,627
I'm surprised she made
it through customs.
40
00:01:27,652 --> 00:01:29,764
I once passed off a mini
horse and three Guinea pigs
41
00:01:29,788 --> 00:01:32,256
as service animals, so
anything is possible.
42
00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:35,078
Perfect a spot of tea for the unveiling.
43
00:01:35,103 --> 00:01:37,918
I was actually just
boiling water for my bath.
44
00:01:37,943 --> 00:01:39,573
Does this mean I should
start thinking about my look
45
00:01:39,597 --> 00:01:40,798
for the premiere?
46
00:01:40,823 --> 00:01:42,876
TBD on the guest list, Alexis,
47
00:01:42,901 --> 00:01:45,069
but I love your enthusiasm.
48
00:01:45,094 --> 00:01:46,828
Box? Box.
49
00:01:48,466 --> 00:01:53,070
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
50
00:01:54,846 --> 00:01:56,223
David: I'm so glad we're doing this.
51
00:01:56,247 --> 00:01:58,525
We never get to spend
quality time together.
52
00:01:58,550 --> 00:02:00,760
Also, I've been neglecting
my wellness journey,
53
00:02:00,785 --> 00:02:03,025
so the cherry blossoms opening
when we both have time off
54
00:02:03,050 --> 00:02:04,684
is really ticking a lot of boxes for me.
55
00:02:04,789 --> 00:02:06,634
Are you sure the cherry
blossoms are even open now?
56
00:02:06,658 --> 00:02:09,044
I mean, I thought that wasn't
for another couple weeks.
57
00:02:09,069 --> 00:02:10,937
Mm, no, no, I called
the botanical gardens,
58
00:02:10,962 --> 00:02:12,529
and had the girl send me a photo.
59
00:02:12,630 --> 00:02:14,865
I learned the hard way
from my last trip to Japan.
60
00:02:14,890 --> 00:02:17,811
Showed up, no cherry blossoms,
turned right back around,
61
00:02:17,836 --> 00:02:19,169
it was such a waste.
62
00:02:19,194 --> 00:02:22,182
Wow, that's a lot of pressure
to put on cherry blossoms.
63
00:02:22,207 --> 00:02:24,408
Well, why else would we
be driving to Elm Valley?
64
00:02:24,433 --> 00:02:25,900
Ooh!
65
00:02:28,910 --> 00:02:31,841
Why else would we be driving
to Elm Valley, Stevie?
66
00:02:32,661 --> 00:02:35,729
The only other reason
I can think of is that...
67
00:02:35,754 --> 00:02:37,588
Emir might be there.
68
00:02:37,765 --> 00:02:39,966
The hotel reviewer that...
69
00:02:39,991 --> 00:02:41,792
You had the dirty motel sex with?
70
00:02:41,893 --> 00:02:44,161
Well, when you put it that
way it sorta cheapens it,
71
00:02:44,186 --> 00:02:47,207
but yes, he might also be there,
72
00:02:47,232 --> 00:02:49,099
reviewing a hotel.
73
00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:51,478
But not the hotel that we're going to,
74
00:02:51,503 --> 00:02:53,504
because that would be
a crazy coincidence.
75
00:02:56,700 --> 00:02:58,709
Sorry, I knew you wouldn't come
76
00:02:58,734 --> 00:03:00,687
if you thought you were
gonna be a third wheel.
77
00:03:00,719 --> 00:03:01,986
Okay well, sucks for him,
78
00:03:02,011 --> 00:03:03,990
because I only booked
the private garden tour
79
00:03:04,015 --> 00:03:05,271
for two people.
80
00:03:05,304 --> 00:03:07,225
- Okay, I'm just gonna say it.
- Please don't.
81
00:03:07,394 --> 00:03:09,362
I don't think we're gonna go...
82
00:03:09,387 --> 00:03:11,088
- No!
- To the botanical gardens.
83
00:03:11,189 --> 00:03:13,190
Wow! So this is an abduction, then.
84
00:03:13,368 --> 00:03:17,504
I am a single woman
driving way out of town
85
00:03:17,529 --> 00:03:20,216
to meet a guy I don't know very well!
86
00:03:20,241 --> 00:03:21,374
Well...
87
00:03:21,399 --> 00:03:23,467
Once he shows up I'm
sure you can still go
88
00:03:23,492 --> 00:03:25,126
to the botanical gardens!
89
00:03:25,151 --> 00:03:28,005
I'm not going to the
botanical gardens by myself!
90
00:03:28,030 --> 00:03:30,431
What, am I gonna walk around,
and admire the cherry blossoms
91
00:03:30,456 --> 00:03:32,591
alone, like some pervert?!
92
00:03:33,154 --> 00:03:34,654
So if you're gonna meet this guy there,
93
00:03:34,679 --> 00:03:36,439
there where am I staying?
I don't do couches!
94
00:03:36,464 --> 00:03:38,031
I got you a separate room.
95
00:03:38,225 --> 00:03:39,859
A separate room, okay.
96
00:03:39,884 --> 00:03:41,618
So this has all been premeditated, then.
97
00:03:41,795 --> 00:03:43,663
You know what, I hope for your sake,
98
00:03:43,688 --> 00:03:45,169
that they have cherry
blossoms in prison.
99
00:03:46,825 --> 00:03:48,225
(Dog barks)
100
00:03:49,427 --> 00:03:50,961
Hey Shannon, what's up?
101
00:03:51,062 --> 00:03:53,564
Ted's in his office, you
can just let yourself in.
102
00:03:53,589 --> 00:03:54,789
Yikes.
103
00:03:54,814 --> 00:03:56,748
Okay, thank you.
104
00:04:00,443 --> 00:04:03,540
Hey, I know you're really swamped today,
105
00:04:03,565 --> 00:04:05,099
so I brought you this.
106
00:04:05,276 --> 00:04:06,877
- You can thank me later.
- Oh!
107
00:04:06,902 --> 00:04:08,436
That's decaf, right?
108
00:04:08,613 --> 00:04:11,024
No, that detail
actually slipped my mind,
109
00:04:11,049 --> 00:04:12,916
so maybe I'll just take it.
110
00:04:13,094 --> 00:04:15,512
Oh, almost a sweet
gesture, Alexis, thank you.
111
00:04:15,537 --> 00:04:17,096
You know who's not sweet?
112
00:04:17,669 --> 00:04:19,165
Old Shan out there.
113
00:04:19,266 --> 00:04:21,668
Okay, first of all
Alexis, she's not old,
114
00:04:21,693 --> 00:04:22,933
we went to vet school together.
115
00:04:22,958 --> 00:04:24,703
And she's actually been
really helpful this week.
116
00:04:25,107 --> 00:04:26,339
To you.
117
00:04:26,896 --> 00:04:29,442
I'm just gonna say it,
Ted. Most people are a fan.
118
00:04:29,467 --> 00:04:31,921
So when someone's not,
it's usually on them.
119
00:04:31,946 --> 00:04:34,447
All right, fine, I, I
didn't wanna bring this up,
120
00:04:34,472 --> 00:04:37,662
because it is so not a thing.
121
00:04:38,147 --> 00:04:41,154
But well, when you and I were broken up,
122
00:04:41,179 --> 00:04:44,615
there was... one night
where Shannon and I...
123
00:04:44,716 --> 00:04:46,984
(Gasps) Oh my God! Ted!
124
00:04:47,009 --> 00:04:48,442
(Sighs) We hooked up.
125
00:04:48,467 --> 00:04:50,493
Yes you did, you little smooch monster!
126
00:04:50,521 --> 00:04:52,089
Well, we did a lot more than that.
127
00:04:52,114 --> 00:04:53,833
(Gasps) I'm sorry, should I be jealous?
128
00:04:53,858 --> 00:04:55,936
No! No, no, no, no, no. It
was just a one-time thing.
129
00:04:55,960 --> 00:04:59,029
- Oh, no.
- No, not "oh no,"
130
00:04:59,054 --> 00:05:01,708
No, I stopped it from going any further.
131
00:05:01,733 --> 00:05:03,744
Because I thought we were
just better off as friends.
132
00:05:03,768 --> 00:05:05,311
Beep, beep!
133
00:05:05,336 --> 00:05:07,823
Paging Dr. Casanova J. Heartbreaker.
134
00:05:07,848 --> 00:05:09,983
Anyway, that's probably
why she seems like
135
00:05:10,008 --> 00:05:12,309
she's a little unsure about
where she stands with you.
136
00:05:12,410 --> 00:05:13,921
Well, thank you for
telling me that, Ted.
137
00:05:13,945 --> 00:05:16,131
That makes so much more
sense than her not liking me.
138
00:05:16,156 --> 00:05:18,024
Well, I'm glad that
we could clear that up.
139
00:05:18,125 --> 00:05:21,461
Okay, well, I will
see you for lunch then,
140
00:05:21,486 --> 00:05:22,755
"Doctor".
141
00:05:22,780 --> 00:05:25,457
Yeah, it's funny because
I actually am a doctor.
142
00:05:25,482 --> 00:05:26,833
So am I...
143
00:05:27,099 --> 00:05:29,867
No, you're not. Just-just Ted.
144
00:05:30,695 --> 00:05:32,496
Roland: Hey, Johnny!
145
00:05:32,521 --> 00:05:36,018
Johnny! I have some good
news for you, my friend.
146
00:05:36,043 --> 00:05:37,844
Well, I could use some good news,
147
00:05:37,869 --> 00:05:40,003
I might have to take out
a mortgage on the dress
148
00:05:40,028 --> 00:05:42,448
- my wife just bought.
- Well, uh...
149
00:05:42,473 --> 00:05:44,518
you know that little hot
water problem you're having?
150
00:05:44,543 --> 00:05:45,544
Yeah?
151
00:05:45,569 --> 00:05:47,546
Well, I've come up with
the perfect excuse for you
152
00:05:47,571 --> 00:05:50,223
to buy yourself a brand
new hot water heater!
153
00:05:50,662 --> 00:05:52,392
Still waiting for the good news.
154
00:05:52,417 --> 00:05:54,418
Well, the good news
is that my friend Terry
155
00:05:54,443 --> 00:05:56,410
can replace the whole thing for you.
156
00:05:56,454 --> 00:05:57,822
- Replace it?
- Mhmm.
157
00:05:58,056 --> 00:05:59,589
Well, how much is that gonna cost?
158
00:05:59,614 --> 00:06:02,101
I did a little negotiating with Terry,
159
00:06:02,126 --> 00:06:04,561
and he says you can have it for $4,200.
160
00:06:04,738 --> 00:06:06,506
- $4200?!
- Right.
161
00:06:06,531 --> 00:06:08,165
Unless you want it installed.
162
00:06:08,342 --> 00:06:11,110
Well, of course I want
it installed, Roland!
163
00:06:11,135 --> 00:06:12,869
Okay, well, that's gonna be $5,500.
164
00:06:12,894 --> 00:06:14,294
Okay, you know what?
165
00:06:14,548 --> 00:06:17,016
I can't afford to throw
away money like that.
166
00:06:17,136 --> 00:06:19,386
Oh, come on, this coming from
the guy who was just bragging
167
00:06:19,410 --> 00:06:22,079
about taking out a mortgage
to pay for his wife's dress!
168
00:06:22,104 --> 00:06:23,957
- I wasn't bragging!
- Ohhh...
169
00:06:23,982 --> 00:06:25,415
Moira: Well, hello!
170
00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:27,660
Is it just me, or is there
a faint scent of honeysuckle
171
00:06:27,685 --> 00:06:28,919
in the air?
172
00:06:29,096 --> 00:06:31,397
Yeah, it might be Johnny's aftershave.
173
00:06:31,422 --> 00:06:34,057
I'm-I'm sorry, it is pungent.
174
00:06:34,550 --> 00:06:37,036
And John, I tried to hang up my gown,
175
00:06:37,061 --> 00:06:39,563
and thank God I caught it
before that silly curtain rod
176
00:06:39,588 --> 00:06:41,355
came crashing down!
177
00:06:41,380 --> 00:06:43,209
Don't worry about it,
we'll get you a new one.
178
00:06:43,234 --> 00:06:45,369
As soon we get uh, "El Tightwad" here
179
00:06:45,394 --> 00:06:47,094
to loosen up the purse strings.
180
00:06:47,119 --> 00:06:49,082
John, give this man a raise!
181
00:06:49,107 --> 00:06:52,466
And when dear, did our
room become so moist?
182
00:06:52,776 --> 00:06:55,895
I'm off to get a dehumidifier,
but I will see you at lunch.
183
00:06:57,497 --> 00:06:58,731
(Sighs)
184
00:06:58,756 --> 00:07:00,824
(Cars rumble)
185
00:07:00,854 --> 00:07:02,455
(Horn honks)
186
00:07:03,026 --> 00:07:05,861
(Muzak plays, phone rings)
187
00:07:06,689 --> 00:07:07,981
Oh, is that him?
188
00:07:09,127 --> 00:07:11,328
- No.
- Okay.
189
00:07:12,330 --> 00:07:14,174
- What about the person...
- David, I would tell you
190
00:07:14,198 --> 00:07:15,532
if I saw him!
191
00:07:17,737 --> 00:07:19,204
Also, that's rude!
192
00:07:19,229 --> 00:07:21,349
Okay, it's just that your
type is very inconsistent.
193
00:07:22,209 --> 00:07:24,443
What time was he supposed
to show up, anyway?
194
00:07:26,288 --> 00:07:27,822
Two hours ago.
195
00:07:27,914 --> 00:07:29,815
And we're sure this is the right hotel?
196
00:07:31,393 --> 00:07:33,613
He's not coming. I'm an idiot.
197
00:07:34,728 --> 00:07:38,073
Well, I guess the good thing
to come out of this abduction
198
00:07:38,098 --> 00:07:40,600
is that if anyone knows
how to crawl out from under
199
00:07:40,625 --> 00:07:43,560
an embarrassing romantic
failure, it's me.
200
00:07:43,661 --> 00:07:46,396
So I say we drop our bags,
201
00:07:46,573 --> 00:07:48,307
go straight to the botanical gardens,
202
00:07:48,332 --> 00:07:50,100
take in some cherry blossoms,
203
00:07:50,125 --> 00:07:52,278
then sleep it off, and
go home fresh tomorrow.
204
00:07:52,443 --> 00:07:54,578
What time was the tour again?
205
00:07:58,976 --> 00:08:01,311
Oh, David, I'm so sorry.
206
00:08:01,801 --> 00:08:03,814
If this wasn't so humiliating for you,
207
00:08:03,915 --> 00:08:06,283
I think I'd be in a
darker headspace right now,
208
00:08:06,384 --> 00:08:08,251
but since it is...
209
00:08:08,886 --> 00:08:10,930
the hotel bar has karaoke,
210
00:08:10,955 --> 00:08:13,442
I say we get several
rounds of polar bear shots,
211
00:08:13,467 --> 00:08:15,334
load up some Mariah,
212
00:08:15,359 --> 00:08:16,839
and I will spend the rest of the night
213
00:08:16,864 --> 00:08:18,431
pretending not to resent you.
214
00:08:18,596 --> 00:08:19,855
Okay.
215
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:21,467
I'll get the first round.
216
00:08:21,492 --> 00:08:22,892
Oh, you'll be getting every round.
217
00:08:24,730 --> 00:08:26,397
(Sighs)
218
00:08:28,027 --> 00:08:30,268
Alexis: Oh my God, Shan! You still here?
219
00:08:30,293 --> 00:08:32,185
Have you not taken lunch?
220
00:08:32,210 --> 00:08:33,510
I've just been pretty busy.
221
00:08:33,535 --> 00:08:34,902
Ugh, same.
222
00:08:35,079 --> 00:08:37,047
Can I get a "hell yeah"
for two hard-working women
223
00:08:37,072 --> 00:08:38,639
in the 21st Century?
224
00:08:38,816 --> 00:08:40,650
(Weak laugh)
225
00:08:40,782 --> 00:08:44,152
Anyway, I think that we both know
226
00:08:44,177 --> 00:08:45,977
that things are a bit off between us,
227
00:08:46,002 --> 00:08:47,702
and I understand why.
228
00:08:48,002 --> 00:08:49,836
Ted told me all about your little...
229
00:08:49,861 --> 00:08:51,480
Mmm! Muah! Muah!
230
00:08:51,557 --> 00:08:54,125
And it's like... not a big deal.
231
00:08:54,785 --> 00:08:56,409
Okay.
232
00:08:56,957 --> 00:08:59,011
Alexis, that's-that's such a relief.
233
00:08:59,036 --> 00:09:01,304
And oh! Honestly, between us,
234
00:09:01,405 --> 00:09:03,340
it was just a drunken one-time thing,
235
00:09:03,365 --> 00:09:05,366
and I told him we'd be
better off as friends.
236
00:09:05,543 --> 00:09:07,077
Oh.
237
00:09:07,102 --> 00:09:09,738
Did you tell him that
after he told you that?
238
00:09:09,814 --> 00:09:11,014
Sorry?
239
00:09:11,039 --> 00:09:12,807
Ted: Alexis. Right on time.
240
00:09:13,060 --> 00:09:15,795
You're telling me, I was
just having a chat with Shan.
241
00:09:16,441 --> 00:09:18,131
Clearing the air about that little trip
242
00:09:18,156 --> 00:09:19,908
you two took to pound town.
243
00:09:19,933 --> 00:09:21,434
- Alexis!
- Whoa!
244
00:09:21,459 --> 00:09:23,337
Okay, let's remember this
is still a place of work.
245
00:09:23,361 --> 00:09:24,771
Look, I don't know about you, Shannon,
246
00:09:24,795 --> 00:09:26,730
but I am so glad we did this.
247
00:09:26,755 --> 00:09:28,733
Had I not talked to her,
I never would've found out
248
00:09:28,758 --> 00:09:30,592
that she called it off.
249
00:09:30,768 --> 00:09:34,440
- Maybe I will go for lunch.
- Well, just, um, one minute.
250
00:09:34,465 --> 00:09:36,549
Again, not that it matters,
251
00:09:36,574 --> 00:09:39,576
you know, but uh, the day after we...
252
00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:44,181
um, we were supposed to meet
up at the 5k for Feral Cats,
253
00:09:44,206 --> 00:09:47,527
and... I never followed up so.
254
00:09:47,559 --> 00:09:51,862
- Oh! Yeah, it totally doesn't matter.
- No.
255
00:09:52,032 --> 00:09:54,563
But I also never followed up.
256
00:09:54,588 --> 00:09:56,993
So when we saw each
other the next weekend
257
00:09:57,018 --> 00:09:59,286
at the opening of Bronwyn's
Exotic Animal Clinic,
258
00:09:59,311 --> 00:10:02,141
I assumed... you'd gotten the hint.
259
00:10:02,166 --> 00:10:04,100
Okay, well, that's what I assumed, so...
260
00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:06,059
Okay, not to interject, but I assumed
261
00:10:06,084 --> 00:10:08,346
that this would play out in
a much more interesting way.
262
00:10:08,382 --> 00:10:10,349
So for the sake of time,
263
00:10:10,374 --> 00:10:12,883
um, I'm just gonna go with
Shannon's version of things.
264
00:10:12,908 --> 00:10:15,000
Shannon, can we get you
anything while we're out?
265
00:10:15,025 --> 00:10:16,390
Uh, I'm not sure that we
actually quite finished
266
00:10:16,414 --> 00:10:17,934
- the conversation.
- Oh, it's okay, Ted.
267
00:10:18,015 --> 00:10:19,416
Because the important thing is,
268
00:10:19,441 --> 00:10:20,679
that Shannon and I had a breakthrough.
269
00:10:20,704 --> 00:10:22,821
Yeah, but I'm just not really
sure where we landed on...
270
00:10:22,846 --> 00:10:24,080
- Mhmm, yeah.
- On the whole...
271
00:10:24,105 --> 00:10:26,173
Shh! Shh! Shh! Shh! Okay.
272
00:10:27,031 --> 00:10:28,968
(Country music plays)
273
00:10:28,993 --> 00:10:30,594
When it comes to water heater repairs,
274
00:10:30,771 --> 00:10:33,039
you don't need electrical
experience to check,
275
00:10:33,064 --> 00:10:34,931
or replace the heating elements.
276
00:10:35,108 --> 00:10:36,375
Great.
277
00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,068
The only thing you need to do...
278
00:10:38,578 --> 00:10:41,271
is make sure the power is off
before you perform any tests...
279
00:10:41,296 --> 00:10:42,997
Okay, where's the power switch?
280
00:10:43,173 --> 00:10:44,984
I need the power switch,
okay, hold on, hold on.
281
00:10:45,009 --> 00:10:46,509
- Find the circuit breaker...
- Power?
282
00:10:46,534 --> 00:10:48,988
I can't get to the circuit
breaker until-hold on!
283
00:10:49,013 --> 00:10:51,548
Slow... slow-hold on!
284
00:10:51,573 --> 00:10:53,516
- Hold-st-stop!
- (Tutorial keeps talking)
285
00:10:53,541 --> 00:10:55,308
Rewind! How do you rewind?!
286
00:10:55,333 --> 00:10:56,834
Where's the manual?!
287
00:10:56,859 --> 00:10:58,757
Oh Johnny, there you are!
288
00:10:58,782 --> 00:11:00,216
I've been looking all over for you.
289
00:11:00,358 --> 00:11:02,325
Urgent question. Um...
290
00:11:02,350 --> 00:11:04,885
what's our policy on smoke breaks?
291
00:11:04,910 --> 00:11:07,006
- Who's taking a smoke break?
- I am.
292
00:11:07,031 --> 00:11:08,932
- You don't smoke.
- Yeah, I know.
293
00:11:08,957 --> 00:11:11,091
And I don't think I should
be penalized for that.
294
00:11:11,664 --> 00:11:13,980
Roland, I'm kinda busy right
now with the water heater.
295
00:11:14,005 --> 00:11:15,538
Johnny, I don't think kicking
296
00:11:15,563 --> 00:11:17,297
that thing is really gonna help.
297
00:11:17,475 --> 00:11:18,708
LOL.
298
00:11:18,733 --> 00:11:20,953
Okay, I'm trying to
follow the video here,
299
00:11:20,978 --> 00:11:22,445
it says it's for beginners.
300
00:11:22,470 --> 00:11:24,348
Yeah well, I think you
got the right video there.
301
00:11:24,448 --> 00:11:26,393
But don't you think something
like that should be handled
302
00:11:26,417 --> 00:11:29,052
by professionals, Johnny?
Like, maybe... Terry?
303
00:11:29,153 --> 00:11:31,087
Roland, you know something?
304
00:11:31,188 --> 00:11:33,033
There's a lot going on
with the family right now,
305
00:11:33,057 --> 00:11:36,326
and if there's an economical
way for me to deal with this,
306
00:11:36,351 --> 00:11:38,128
without pumping more money into it,
307
00:11:38,229 --> 00:11:39,596
then that's what I'm gonna do!
308
00:11:39,621 --> 00:11:40,726
Johnny, let me tell you something.
309
00:11:40,751 --> 00:11:42,967
That is not the place to cut corners.
310
00:11:42,992 --> 00:11:45,149
Okay? What you need to do is re-examine
311
00:11:45,174 --> 00:11:47,046
your extravagant lifestyle.
312
00:11:47,071 --> 00:11:48,312
What are you talking about?
313
00:11:48,361 --> 00:11:51,828
Well, not all of us can drive
around in an 8 cylinder car.
314
00:11:51,853 --> 00:11:55,382
It's a '78 Lincoln, and
it's all we could afford!
315
00:11:55,407 --> 00:11:57,445
- Right, '78. Vintage.
- Okay!
316
00:11:57,470 --> 00:11:59,375
Roland, do you mind
if I get back to work?!
317
00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:01,835
Yeah, no problem, I've got
to go on my smoke break.
318
00:12:04,430 --> 00:12:06,126
(Sighs, loud clang)
319
00:12:10,502 --> 00:12:14,970
♪ As time goes on...
320
00:12:16,050 --> 00:12:17,818
(Song ends) (Half-hearted applause)
321
00:12:18,845 --> 00:12:21,274
Wow, for someone who can barely stand,
322
00:12:21,299 --> 00:12:23,067
she sounds good.
323
00:12:23,750 --> 00:12:25,126
How are we feeling?
324
00:12:25,181 --> 00:12:28,257
All things considered,
I'm feeling better.
325
00:12:28,282 --> 00:12:30,248
Good. I'm gonna see if
they have more Mariah,
326
00:12:30,273 --> 00:12:32,107
the first three songs
were just a warm-up.
327
00:12:33,389 --> 00:12:35,023
(Chuckles)
328
00:12:37,193 --> 00:12:38,527
(Nervous exhale)
329
00:12:40,345 --> 00:12:42,440
Oh. Hi.
330
00:12:42,541 --> 00:12:44,142
I'm so sorry.
331
00:12:44,167 --> 00:12:45,978
A student driver rear-ended
me on the way over here,
332
00:12:46,002 --> 00:12:47,745
it was a whole thing. He started crying.
333
00:12:47,770 --> 00:12:49,456
We had to exchange
insurance information.
334
00:12:49,481 --> 00:12:51,133
His mom was there.
335
00:12:51,158 --> 00:12:52,759
You couldn'tve called?
336
00:12:52,936 --> 00:12:54,403
I thought I was stood up.
337
00:12:54,428 --> 00:12:56,388
The student driver has
my phone, and I have his.
338
00:12:56,430 --> 00:12:57,931
We didn't give them back to each other
339
00:12:57,956 --> 00:12:59,275
after we exchanged info.
340
00:12:59,314 --> 00:13:01,092
So if you wanna know what's
on a 16 year old's smartphone,
341
00:13:01,116 --> 00:13:02,483
I could offer you that.
342
00:13:02,661 --> 00:13:03,994
No, thank you.
343
00:13:04,019 --> 00:13:05,786
Yeah, that's probably for the best.
344
00:13:06,329 --> 00:13:08,431
Okay, good news, they have "Fantasy,"
345
00:13:08,456 --> 00:13:11,376
which means that you get
to play Ol' Dirty Bastard.
346
00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:13,504
Oh, are-are you here with someone?
347
00:13:13,528 --> 00:13:16,063
- Uh, no.
- Oh! Ohhh...
348
00:13:16,240 --> 00:13:18,041
Oh um, no.
349
00:13:18,066 --> 00:13:19,900
We just ran into each other at the bar.
350
00:13:20,001 --> 00:13:22,336
Um, long story short, I took
a pottery class with this one.
351
00:13:22,437 --> 00:13:23,737
(Laughs falsely)
352
00:13:24,259 --> 00:13:25,815
Oh, uh, I'm Emir.
353
00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:28,160
- Oh, Dane... a. Dana.
- Dana?
354
00:13:28,185 --> 00:13:31,421
Yeah, so I run-I run
the karaoke at the hotel.
355
00:13:31,446 --> 00:13:33,501
- Hmm.
- Yeah.
356
00:13:33,774 --> 00:13:36,470
Uh, Stevie, I know I'm two hours late,
357
00:13:36,495 --> 00:13:38,295
but can I still take you to dinner,
358
00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:39,453
or have I blown it?
359
00:13:39,630 --> 00:13:41,531
Oh, you've blown it.
360
00:13:41,632 --> 00:13:43,099
But I'll still take a free dinner.
361
00:13:43,712 --> 00:13:45,068
- I can work with that, okay.
- Okay.
362
00:13:45,093 --> 00:13:46,712
- Mhmm.
- Okay!
363
00:13:46,737 --> 00:13:49,072
Um, I'm just gonna settle up my tab,
364
00:13:49,097 --> 00:13:51,324
- I'll meet you outside.
- Okay, yeah.
365
00:13:51,349 --> 00:13:52,816
Uh, nice to meet you, Dana.
366
00:13:53,221 --> 00:13:55,022
Yes, thanks.
367
00:13:58,439 --> 00:13:59,749
Why don't you just come with us?
368
00:14:00,329 --> 00:14:02,018
I already made you miss
the botanical gardens.
369
00:14:02,043 --> 00:14:03,344
I can't leave you here.
370
00:14:03,444 --> 00:14:05,121
Okay, honestly, I'm
gonna be really exhausted
371
00:14:05,146 --> 00:14:06,613
after my set anyways, so...
372
00:14:06,791 --> 00:14:09,092
I'll probably just go to bed.
373
00:14:09,548 --> 00:14:10,927
Are you sure?
374
00:14:10,952 --> 00:14:13,721
No, so get outta here
before I change my mind.
375
00:14:14,321 --> 00:14:15,723
- Thank you.
- Okay.
376
00:14:15,748 --> 00:14:17,582
Unnecessary, but...
377
00:14:20,228 --> 00:14:22,048
Keep the mics hot, I'm comin' in!
378
00:14:22,364 --> 00:14:23,831
(Loud whirring)
379
00:14:29,137 --> 00:14:31,438
Moira? We need to talk, sweetheart.
380
00:14:31,539 --> 00:14:33,707
I'm sorry dear, is your mouth moving?
381
00:14:34,350 --> 00:14:37,378
Could you uh, turn off the
dehumidifier for a second?
382
00:14:37,479 --> 00:14:39,012
Because I can't possibly
383
00:14:39,114 --> 00:14:41,348
hear you over the sound
of the dehumidifier!
384
00:14:41,373 --> 00:14:43,498
Oh, just-just turn off...
385
00:14:45,186 --> 00:14:46,487
(Beeping, whirring stops)
386
00:14:47,068 --> 00:14:49,966
So, it looks like in
addition to the water heater,
387
00:14:49,991 --> 00:14:52,779
we're gonna have to replace
some of the plumbing.
388
00:14:53,137 --> 00:14:55,138
And the water is so hard,
389
00:14:55,163 --> 00:14:58,676
that Terry said that it's
likely in the next little while
390
00:14:58,732 --> 00:15:00,989
we might also need a new...
391
00:15:01,014 --> 00:15:02,445
water softener.
392
00:15:02,546 --> 00:15:04,714
John, I'm sorry you've
had such a hard day.
393
00:15:04,739 --> 00:15:07,145
- Yeah...
- On the upside,
394
00:15:07,170 --> 00:15:10,928
this gown has exceeded all expectations.
395
00:15:11,264 --> 00:15:12,765
Yeah, well that's good, sweetheart,
396
00:15:12,790 --> 00:15:15,134
that's... that's good.
It's just that um,
397
00:15:15,159 --> 00:15:17,570
you know, with all
these costs piling up,
398
00:15:17,595 --> 00:15:19,963
we might need to take a hard look at uh,
399
00:15:19,988 --> 00:15:23,356
some of our recent uh... purchases.
400
00:15:23,381 --> 00:15:25,649
I told Alexis now is not the time
401
00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:27,060
to expand that home office.
402
00:15:27,085 --> 00:15:29,453
Not with the price of ink today.
403
00:15:29,478 --> 00:15:32,365
Yeah... Moira, look.
404
00:15:32,390 --> 00:15:35,301
The last thing I want to do is uh...
405
00:15:35,326 --> 00:15:37,494
rain on your parade,
406
00:15:37,595 --> 00:15:39,196
but I think for the next little while,
407
00:15:39,221 --> 00:15:42,041
any money coming in should probably...
408
00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:43,934
be for the family.
409
00:15:43,959 --> 00:15:45,993
This dress is for the family.
410
00:15:46,170 --> 00:15:49,406
To remind us that our
futures lie outside this town.
411
00:15:49,826 --> 00:15:51,517
It feels these days
like I'm the only one
412
00:15:51,542 --> 00:15:53,243
who hasn't veered off course.
413
00:15:53,268 --> 00:15:54,912
Well, no one's veering
off course, Moira,
414
00:15:54,937 --> 00:15:58,936
we're all just uh...
taking a different approach.
415
00:15:59,881 --> 00:16:01,461
The ceremonial purchase of the gown
416
00:16:01,486 --> 00:16:03,353
has always been my good luck charm.
417
00:16:04,022 --> 00:16:06,189
Well, from everything you've
told us about this movie,
418
00:16:06,214 --> 00:16:10,647
Moira, it sounds like for
the first time in a long time,
419
00:16:10,672 --> 00:16:11,862
you may not need any luck.
420
00:16:12,039 --> 00:16:14,941
Oh, John! Thank you for that.
421
00:16:15,042 --> 00:16:17,310
And know that you've been heard!
422
00:16:17,335 --> 00:16:18,802
Good.
423
00:16:19,395 --> 00:16:21,830
(Beeps, loud whirring)
424
00:16:27,899 --> 00:16:30,023
Ted: You know, Alexis,
I've been thinking about it,
425
00:16:30,047 --> 00:16:32,215
and... I'm really glad
that you and Shannon
426
00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:34,293
were able to get
everything out in the open.
427
00:16:34,868 --> 00:16:37,492
Me too. We're actually
grabbing drinks tomorrow.
428
00:16:37,517 --> 00:16:39,385
Great, yeah, you know, and I-I...
429
00:16:39,410 --> 00:16:43,331
I care way more about that
than any of the details
430
00:16:43,356 --> 00:16:45,491
of how we ended things,
431
00:16:45,516 --> 00:16:48,251
or even whether they were accurate.
432
00:16:48,485 --> 00:16:50,363
It seems like it was just
like a little miscommunication
433
00:16:50,387 --> 00:16:51,921
on your part, is all.
434
00:16:51,946 --> 00:16:54,481
Yeah well, uh, Shannon aside,
435
00:16:54,506 --> 00:16:56,235
I think it's important that I tell you
436
00:16:56,260 --> 00:16:58,404
that there were a few
others before Heather.
437
00:16:58,429 --> 00:17:00,463
And there may have been
438
00:17:00,488 --> 00:17:02,589
a couple of broken hearts along the way.
439
00:17:02,722 --> 00:17:05,024
Whatever you say, Ted.
440
00:17:06,407 --> 00:17:08,814
Yeah... it's actually kinda funny,
441
00:17:08,839 --> 00:17:10,740
because I was just
going through my phone,
442
00:17:10,765 --> 00:17:12,584
you know, to make some
space, and then I came across
443
00:17:12,609 --> 00:17:14,662
this little back and
forth from a while ago.
444
00:17:14,687 --> 00:17:16,388
I believe you, Ted.
445
00:17:16,489 --> 00:17:18,533
You're still Dr. Casanova to me.
446
00:17:18,558 --> 00:17:20,225
Okay, well, the tone of your voice
447
00:17:20,250 --> 00:17:21,743
makes it seem like you don't
believe a word you're saying.
448
00:17:21,768 --> 00:17:22,977
Okay, Ted!
449
00:17:23,570 --> 00:17:25,104
(Clears her throat)
450
00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:27,795
(Reads) "Dear Melanie."
451
00:17:28,435 --> 00:17:30,547
Melanie? Is this the girl
from the falafel place?
452
00:17:30,572 --> 00:17:32,440
Yeah, I don't think that's relevant.
453
00:17:32,839 --> 00:17:35,374
Ahem. "I've had a lot of
fun hanging out with you,
454
00:17:35,399 --> 00:17:37,454
and I really...
455
00:17:37,479 --> 00:17:41,413
fal-awful saying this over text,
456
00:17:41,438 --> 00:17:43,906
but I'm just not feeling
strongly enough to take
457
00:17:43,931 --> 00:17:46,766
this to the next level. I'm sorry."
458
00:17:47,020 --> 00:17:49,555
Pretty harsh. But it had to be done.
459
00:17:50,172 --> 00:17:51,824
And then um, she wrote...
460
00:17:51,849 --> 00:17:54,910
- Oh, it doesn't matter what she wrote.
- "Cool!" Exclamation mark.
461
00:17:55,201 --> 00:17:58,297
And it looks like you ended
up walking her dog for her?
462
00:17:58,322 --> 00:18:00,790
(Sighs) Well, she seemed really upset.
463
00:18:01,146 --> 00:18:02,719
Listen Ted,
464
00:18:03,158 --> 00:18:05,237
I've gone through enough
heartbreakers for like,
465
00:18:05,262 --> 00:18:07,263
two people's lifetimes.
466
00:18:07,364 --> 00:18:09,365
And I don't want that anymore.
467
00:18:09,700 --> 00:18:11,501
I want you.
468
00:18:12,269 --> 00:18:14,270
And that cute lil' butt.
469
00:18:16,362 --> 00:18:20,853
David and Tammy: ♪ Ohhhh...
470
00:18:20,878 --> 00:18:22,386
Oh! Oh!
471
00:18:22,413 --> 00:18:24,614
Yes, Tammy! Tammy, everybody!
472
00:18:24,639 --> 00:18:26,340
It's Tammy! Yeah!
473
00:18:26,365 --> 00:18:28,165
(Gasps) Stevie, hi!
474
00:18:28,190 --> 00:18:29,657
Oh...
475
00:18:30,063 --> 00:18:32,664
- Hi!
- Hi.
476
00:18:33,094 --> 00:18:37,097
So... Emir asked me if I
wanted to stay the night.
477
00:18:37,270 --> 00:18:39,738
Ohhhh! (Laughs drunkenly)
478
00:18:39,763 --> 00:18:41,050
That sounds promising.
479
00:18:41,075 --> 00:18:44,000
Yeah. Um, I thought you
were gonna go to bed?
480
00:18:44,177 --> 00:18:46,921
Oh no, I was, but then
Tammy kept buying shots,
481
00:18:46,946 --> 00:18:49,815
and the whole room got behind
me in like, a really big way.
482
00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:51,674
Anyway, I have seven
more songs to finish,
483
00:18:51,699 --> 00:18:53,377
and some new fans who
would be very disappointed
484
00:18:53,402 --> 00:18:55,036
if I don't close the show.
485
00:18:55,061 --> 00:18:58,090
- Oh, Dana! Or is it David?
- Huh?
486
00:18:58,115 --> 00:19:00,060
Listen, I just wanted you
to know that Stevie told me
487
00:19:00,084 --> 00:19:01,011
what you did for her tonight.
488
00:19:01,073 --> 00:19:02,214
You know, giving up your evening,
489
00:19:02,239 --> 00:19:03,370
so that we could have
some time together.
490
00:19:03,395 --> 00:19:05,296
Anyway, it was really
cool of you to do it,
491
00:19:05,321 --> 00:19:07,347
is what I'm saying, and
not just because um...
492
00:19:07,372 --> 00:19:09,050
we get to have a little
sleepover because of it.
493
00:19:09,204 --> 00:19:11,005
(Makes retching sound, laughs)
494
00:19:11,035 --> 00:19:13,336
So to say thank you, I took
care of your room charges.
495
00:19:13,797 --> 00:19:16,237
Oh my God! Hello!
496
00:19:16,262 --> 00:19:18,601
Um, hi! Can I get another drink then,
497
00:19:18,626 --> 00:19:19,893
to the room, please? Thanks!
498
00:19:19,918 --> 00:19:21,819
I actually just meant
like, your mini-bar.
499
00:19:21,844 --> 00:19:24,212
Oh no, I finished that. Hey, Tam!
500
00:19:24,237 --> 00:19:25,905
You want some zhampagne?!
501
00:19:25,930 --> 00:19:27,564
Yeah, two please, drinks.
502
00:19:27,956 --> 00:19:30,079
Okay, um... what do
you say we get up there,
503
00:19:30,104 --> 00:19:32,416
maybe do a little duet? I feel
like that's the kind of thing
504
00:19:32,441 --> 00:19:34,259
you'd be totally
comfortable with, right?
505
00:19:34,284 --> 00:19:35,618
- Mhmm...
- Yeah, love that.
506
00:19:35,719 --> 00:19:37,697
I think it's best if you guys
just sat down, and watched.
507
00:19:37,721 --> 00:19:39,097
- Oh, okay.
- Next time.
508
00:19:39,122 --> 00:19:40,198
- Yeah. Mhmm.
- Off the hook for now.
509
00:19:40,223 --> 00:19:42,534
Uno, Tammy! I think I'm going
to do this one by myself.
510
00:19:42,574 --> 00:19:43,597
- Oh!
- Thank you so much, though.
511
00:19:43,622 --> 00:19:45,022
- We'll call you back.
- Wow.
512
00:19:45,047 --> 00:19:47,214
See you soon. I would like
to dedicate this one...
513
00:19:47,239 --> 00:19:49,890
to the lovers right over there!
514
00:19:49,915 --> 00:19:51,149
- Okay...
- And, goodnight.
515
00:19:51,174 --> 00:19:53,767
David: The
la-la-lovers... Cue it up!
516
00:19:58,160 --> 00:19:59,827
Okay, are you coming out?
517
00:19:59,928 --> 00:20:01,206
Can you stop yelling, please?!
518
00:20:01,230 --> 00:20:03,331
I had 14 polar bear shots last night.
519
00:20:03,356 --> 00:20:05,824
Moira, do you want us to close our eyes?
520
00:20:06,077 --> 00:20:08,112
(Door latch clicks)
521
00:20:08,137 --> 00:20:09,537
(Dress rustles)
522
00:20:13,217 --> 00:20:15,351
Oh my God.
523
00:20:16,644 --> 00:20:20,151
Moira, it's gorgeous.
524
00:20:21,189 --> 00:20:22,860
Wasn't it shown with a veil?
525
00:20:22,885 --> 00:20:24,452
Oh, the veil's on its way.
526
00:20:24,477 --> 00:20:27,346
Well, now that I see
it on you, I understand!
527
00:20:27,675 --> 00:20:29,366
I feel like I'm waiting for the limo
528
00:20:29,391 --> 00:20:32,126
to take us to your
next red carpet event!
529
00:20:32,789 --> 00:20:34,590
Well, sweetheart, if that's...
530
00:20:34,956 --> 00:20:36,987
if that's the dress
you want, then, uh...
531
00:20:37,012 --> 00:20:39,894
It is. But you're right,
John, it's not the time.
532
00:20:39,919 --> 00:20:43,472
So before I send her back,
take a mental picture.
533
00:20:44,051 --> 00:20:46,185
(Sighs)
534
00:20:48,162 --> 00:20:51,221
And perhaps an actual picture as well?
535
00:20:51,246 --> 00:20:53,581
- Anyone have a camera?
- Oh.
536
00:20:53,606 --> 00:20:55,607
- Yes, yes.
- Oh yes.
537
00:20:55,784 --> 00:20:57,980
- Gimme like, a mm!
- Mm!
538
00:20:58,005 --> 00:20:59,797
- (Camera clicks)
- Like, arm.
539
00:20:59,822 --> 00:21:01,620
- Oh!
- Okay.
540
00:21:01,645 --> 00:21:03,379
- Yeah, got it?
- (Camera clicks)
541
00:21:04,335 --> 00:21:05,702
Okay, that's it.
542
00:21:05,727 --> 00:21:09,006
And if all goes to plan, we'll
meet again on the red carpet.
543
00:21:09,183 --> 00:21:11,518
Ideally, sometime this year.
544
00:21:11,543 --> 00:21:13,243
And those are the
shoes we're going with?
545
00:21:13,268 --> 00:21:15,269
- What do you think?
- No.
546
00:21:15,294 --> 00:21:17,748
Shoes, later. As well as jewels.
547
00:21:17,773 --> 00:21:19,874
- (David and Alexis gasp)
- What?!
548
00:21:19,898 --> 00:21:24,898
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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