All language subtitles for Crazy for Christmas 2005 480p DVDRip.4-3.DD2.0.x264-HANDJOB

That's the driver.

She's the one that I want; only
don't tell her that I asked for her.

Come on mom.

It's almost Christmas.
We need to get the tree.

Come on.

Cuddles first.

He didn't say excuse me.

Yeah, he'll get coal
in his stocking.

Now, see we've got
to be really careful

about which tree to
buy because Santa...

I want the biggest one!

All right.
I've got twenty bucks.

It's Christmas Eve.
Let's talk trees.

A double sawbuck ain't going
to buy you much top lady.

Did I mention my 7-year-old boy lives
for decorating a Christmas tree

and a single mom
is on a fixed budget.

Here, I'll give you a deal.

Why don't you take this one?

Oh give me a break pal!

But this one normally sales for $50.

Lady, you'll take it or leave it.

What do I look like, Santa Claus?

Hey, t--
Look at this!

It's the last one of its kind.

It's magical.
A Santa magnet.

What do you think?

It's a Charlie Brown tree.

It's all we can afford sweetie.

Okay, let's go.

Do you think Santa
might come early?

He never does.

I hope I get as many
presents as last year.

Do you think I'll
get an R.C. super bike?

They're so cool.

Well don't get your
hopes up too high.

How come?
It was at the top of my list.

Well, Santa's had a tough year.

How come?

There's more kids,

so that means there are
fewer gifts for everybody.

Home come?

I've been extra special good.

Oh, I know you have sweetie.

You know that Christmas is about
more than just gifts, right?

How come?

You've got to stop asking how come!

How come?

- Hey Trevor.
- Hi.

Don't get on that skateboard.

Shannon, hi.

Hey Mrs. Granger.

Staying here for the holidays?

Yeah, staying here.

Family coming to visit?

No. No family,
just me and the boy.

I got my sister and her
no-good out-of-work husband

coming over with their bratty kids.

Oy.

He's always drunk and them kids
is always busting up something.

Oh, what are you going to do?

It's the holidays.

Trevor, let's go.

You ought to come over
later for a visit.

I bought a ham.
It was on sale.

My cousin norm is coming over.

He works for the M.T.A..

Got a great health plan.

Full dental.

That's nice.

Trevor, let's go inside sweetie.

Norm's a sweet guy, a little stalky,

but solid if you know what I mean.

I figure he's lonely,
you're lonely..

You should meet.

Trevor! Now!

So I'll see you tonight then.

Oh, wear something
snazzy - for norm.

Try it deeper on the branch honey.

Popcorn!

Hey, I got it.

Oh hot, hot, hot, hot!

Ow, ow, ow, ow!

Telephone.

Hello.

Hey, Jake, this is weird,
I was just holding...

What?

No, don't do this...

You can't do this...

No, you're going to tell him.

Trevor, it's your daddy.

Daddy!

I've been real good.

I swear...

Then I won't swear anymore.

When are you coming over?

Okay, okay, okay.

Well, this tree is not
going to decorate itself.

Dad's going to Aspen for Christmas.

I know sport.

He doesn't love me, does he?

Oh, of course he loves you.

He loves you very much.

It's just hard for him
to get away from work.

He works at Aspen?

Now we're not going to let this
ruin our Christmas are we?

Are we?

Can I eat the popcorn?

Sure. Knock yourself out.

And save some for the tree.

- Hello.
- Hi, it's Herb.

- Oh, hey Herb.
- Yeah, Merry Christmas.

Yeah, Merry Christmas.

- I think I've got a job for you.
- Yeah, when?

- Right now.
- Herb, it's Christmas Eve.

The guys a V.I.P.,

it could be a very
important client to us,

and you know how we could
use very important clients.

I got Trevor.

Look, he'll pay triple rate
plus a bonus.

I can't. Get one of the other guys.

I got nobody else.

You've got to do me this solid.

Hey, I'm stuck.

Herb, I got to go.

Think how far this triple
pay plus a bonus would go.

You could get that kid
some more presents.

Are you going to do this or what?

Okay, two hours, that's all he gets.

And I want new years and easter off

and a week in march to
cram for my C.P.A. exam.

All this wheeling and dealing
- You're killing me here.

Yeah, take it or leave it.

Okay, look when you pass your exam
you're going to do my taxes.

Oh, I wouldn't go
anywhere near those.

Okay, give me the details.

480 Park West,

the guy's name is Fred Nickells,
pick him up at 11 o'clock.

Cutting it close there Herb.

Yeah, just wear the hat, okay.

Yeah.

Hey, here's a great idea.

How would you like to
go to Mrs. Granger's

and play with here
nieces and nephews?

She smells like a sock.

I bet she has cookies.

Her cookies taste like cheese.

Can you help me out here?

Mom needs to go to work.

What about the tree?

Well we can finish
decorating it when I get back.

But I don't want to
go to Mrs. Granger's.

Well sometimes you got to
do things you don't want to.

That's life.

It's not fair.

I'm telling you I wrote that cheque.

Yeah hang on.

How come you people are
working Christmas Eve anyway?

Shouldn't you be out drinking
eggnog or something?

Here it is.

December 17, cheque #332.

Yeah, yeah, no I told you
I wrote it.

Well it's not my fault if
you haven't gotten it yet.

Look, I don't know if you know this,
but I work for channel 6 news...

No I'm not the anchor.

No I'm not the weather
guy, or the sports guy.

I work weekends, I do
feature stories, uh huh,

and if I'm pushed
I may do an undercover investigation

on how you intimidate hard-working
people during the holidays.

Yeah, honest people
trying to eke out a living,

put food on the table,
clothing on their backs,

until you blood-sucking
finance companies

come along with
your high interest payments

and your intimidating
collection tactics...

Is this the payment
you're talking about?

What's your grace period on this?

Hello?

That's telling him, Petie.

Please don't call me Petie.

Here.

What's this?

Secret Santa.

Billy's heavy metal
Christmas classics.

You shouldn't have.

It wasn't from me.

Now you've got to give a gift
for the name you picked.

You got Lauren, remember?

Oh, crap.

So I hear Martel is
leaving the D.C. bureau.

Word at the water cooler is
that it's you or Lauren for the gig.

Do me a favour,
will you wrap this?

Do you know
what a flange looks like?

I can't believe you would
even consider Lauren for the D.C. gig.

I'm due Frank.

The wife wants an old fashioned
Christmas with the grandkids.

Nothing electronic.

I busted my butt to get that gig.

I've taken every fluff
piece you've ever given me

and I've made it work, right?

I've interviewed heads of state,
six sitting presidents.

I was almost set on fire,
and I can't figure out

how slot B fits into flange E.

Lauren is a hack.

I know she's a hack.

Then why put her right
where the network

can watch her every move?

D.C. is the hot spot for anybody
who wants to go national.

She's not city.

You are.

What's that supposed to mean?

You're like a neighborhood
kind of guy.

People feel like you're one of 'em.

I don't want to be one of 'em Frank.

I'm sick to death of the gruff
but loveable hotdog vendor.

The gruff but loveable
subway conductor,

the gruff but loveable cabbie.

But you're so good at it.

You're gruff but loveable.

I'm suffocating here, Frank.

Peter, this is going
to come from upstairs.

If she gets the job, I'll quit.

Hm.

You want the job?

Stop sitting on your rump
waiting for news to happen.

Show them what you've got.

Merry Christmas.

Best I could do.

Thanks.

- What'd Frank say?
- We got to make our own splash.

Excellent!

I met this chick in this club

where they pierce themselves
in really weird places.

That'd make a great story.

Okay people, here's the gig for today.

The sooner you get out and file,

the sooner you can get
home and wit for Santa.

Hey, Lauren, here's this thing.

Ah, you're my Secret Santa.

Billy's heavy metal
Christmas classics?

Yeah, I thought you'd like it.

Way to regift butt rash.

I gave this to you.

I got it for free with a
fill up at the gas station.

That's your idea of a gift?

A free CD from a gas station!

I'll tell you what,
I'll send you a nice tie from D.C..

Oh yeah, well we'll see about that
you non-creative gift giver person.

You got to work on your comebacks.

Peter...

Thanks.

So what did we pull?
Cop raid? Shooting? Fire?

Gruff but loveable elves.

I really appreciate it Mrs. Granger.

Don't you give it another thought.

We just love this little fella.

Okay, hug and a kiss?

Hug?

Kiss?

Okay, Trevor you leave me no choice.

It is tickle attack time.

I promise I won't be long.

You better not.

He'll be fine.

Be good.

Bye!
Bye.

- Who you gettin'?
- Fred Nickells.

Oh, nutsy fegan, you're
going to have a fun trip.

I beat you Roger, one more time!

Yes you did, Mr. Nickells.

You must be my driver.

It's the hat right?

Big tip-off.

You're just so much
prettier than your picture.

It's that book.

I hate that book.

No, no, all I mean is
it's just wonderful

to just see you actually here,
in person.

Okay, we need to lay
some ground rules here.

I am the driver, you're the passenger.

You tell me where you want to go,
and I will take you there.

If you have some fantasy trip
going on in your head,

you called the wrong service.

You speak this way
to all your clients?

Only the ones that need
to be set straight.

Well, Fred Nickells, passenger.

Shannon McMannus, driver.

Okay.

Tell you what Shannon, may I ask,
why don't we hit the street?

Good.

All right, Roger
- Brief case.

Sir.

One moment.

Thank you Mr. Nickells.

Felice navidad, Roger.

That's spanish, not to confused
with the portuguese Felice natal.

Eight years I've been on the job,

he don't say 2 words
to me the whole time.

All of a sudden he's Mr. Happy.

It's the 4th C-note
I've gotten this week.

Good luck.
You're going to need it.

First time in a limo, Mr. Nickells?

No, no, no.

I just never took the time to stop
and push the buttons.

For pete sake, call me Fred.

So where to Fred?

Well...

Roger?
Yes sir?

Banana.

Hold on Roger.

Mhm.

Joyeux noel.

Thank you, Mr. Nickells.

That's french.

Whatever.

Where do people go
to get a trim, you know,

a haircut in this town?

I'm going out on a limb here,
but I'd say a barber shop.

Where do you usually go?

At my office.

At least I used to, but I want
the fastest barber shop in town.

That would be speedy cuts, downtown.

Speedy cuts - gee
I like the sound of that.

Speedy cuts tout suite.

Tout suite it is.

Certainly
in the holiday spirit, aren't we.

I learned Merry Christmas
in 24 languages.

Good for you sir,
I'm sure that'll come in handy.

And what about you, Shannon McMannus?

How's your Christmas spirit?

Ho, ho, ho.

I don't believe you for one minute.

Sorry, I really don't feel
like sharing.

Oh, tough nut eh.

I'm going to crack ya!

I wouldn't bet on it.

We have a company policy about
getting too cozy with our clients

or interfering with their business.

You know something?

I have not had a hotdog
in ...for over 20 years.

How could I have not had
a hotdog in that long?

Time flies.

Yes it does, so pull over.

Oh yeah, best dog in the city.

Hey, I'm looking for a hotdog.

Well,
you came to the right place pal.

It so happens I have
a lovely little vintage here.

Been cooking since about 1968.

How do you like it Mac?

Well,
let's walk it through the garden.

One dog with the works coming up.

And you Shannon McMannus,
what will you have?

Oh, I'm fine.

I know you are, but suit yourself.

Hey, what are those brown things?

You're kidding right?

It's a knish.

Well, I've got to have
one of those.

And a pop.

I love saying the word pop.

Shannon McManus, pop?

No pop, thanks.

What's the best you've
ever done here in 1 day

pushing the product?

Best day?

I don't know $100, $150,
if it's really hot.

I'd like to buy out
the whole cart,

send you home early, you know,
a little story to tell.

How's that for some relish?

Hey, you've got $200, it's all yours.

Tell you what?
You've got 5 or $600 there

and it's all yours.

Oh.

Five hundred bucks!
Merry Christmas Mac!

Well, Buon natale.
That's italian.

Listen, hot dogs are on me.

Come on, have a free lunch okay!

Okay.

Hauska joulu, as the finns say!

That's cantonese.

You know I might get myself
one of those carts

for my living room.

That has got to be the most
expensive hotdog in this city.

Maybe you ought to be
a little more careful

spreading around that kind of cash.

But what happened to the policy
of noninterference.

Well it's not the Star Trek
prime directive,

I'm just saying...

Uh huh, gottcha, loud and clear.

Of course, you don't mind
if I just ignore you.

It's your dime.

Several thousand dimes actually.

But you keep up the good work

and you'll get your
slice of the pie okay.

Listen, is this phone paid up?

Knock yourself out, Fred.

Okay.

I'll bet you I'm back
in less than 2 minutes.

Ho ho ho, season's greetings.

All right somebody, start cutting!

Is this Mr. Nickells' limo?

Yeah, inside...

He called and asked me
to wait for him.

I'm his attorney.

Arthur Finnegan.

What's with this guy anyway?

Excuse me?

Any recent blows to the head?

I told you it would take me
less than 2 minutes.

All right, now listen
up boys, gather round.

I want you to repeat after me:
Gledileg j�l!

Gledileg j�l!

Okay, congratulations,

you have just said Merry Christmas
in icelandic.

There you go.

Oh, Shannon McMannus, Arthur Finnegan.

Arthur, Shannon.

Ah, maybe we should get going
before the mob gets more mob-like.

Oh no, they're fine.

Hello there everyone.

Listen, that's german.

I really think you should
stop doing that..

All I'm doing
is saying Merry Christmas.

I mean the money.

Arthur, let's roll.

You ride up front with Shannon.

Oh, no, no, no.

No one sits next to me
when I drive.

How else are the 2 of you going
to get to know one another,

on your first date.

Date?

What the hell is going on here?

Your nostrils flare, your eyes
brighten up when you get angry...

Just like your mother.

What do you know about my mother?

Arthur....
Let's roll.

Right.

Bye!
Merry Christmas!

Are you going to tell me
how you know my mother?

Did I say I knew your mother?

Well what was that crack
about my nose and eyes

looking like hers?

Well, doesn't every daughter
resemble her mother?

Hey, what is this
date business with Arthur?

I should have said first meeting.

But, if you 2 want
to date each other,

I won't stand in your way.

There is something really hincky here.

No offence, Arthur.

None taken.

I'll tell you what, Shannon McMannus,

why don't you consider
this tip, an advance,

to just alleviate your
sense of hinckiness.

Where to Fred?

You see the looks on the kids' faces,

the way they light up
when they see you?

It makes it all worthwhile.

Until one little bastard pukes
all over your pointed shoes,

and then you just want
to reach out

and grab their scrawny little neck
and...

Cut, cut, cut...

What did I say?

I gave you tons of sentiment,
like you asked.

You can't call kids little bastards.

You spend the day in felt
with those little bastards

and come up with a better name.

Okay, let's take five, Kenny...

You're really ticked off
about being in competition

with Lauren
for this D.C. gig, aren't you?

I don't want
to talk about it, okay.

All right, fine.

Suit yourself.

The thing is I'm ready
for the big stories.

Who's going to be changed

by seeing Kenny the disgruntled elf?

Lighten up dude, it's Christmas Eve.

Merry Christmas, come on up,
tell Santa what you want.

Smile.

Hey, Allison, what's up?

Sure, but you're going
to owe me, big time.

All right.

Hey, Janet.

What's up?

Need a haircut?

Sure.

Hey, you're not vibing this?

You've been watching
a lot of MTV have you Fred?

Busted..!

I'm vibing just fine from here.

All right Arthur, let's skate.

Peel out.

Knees bent Mr. Nickells, that's it...

Good, excellent...

Hello, Mrs. Granger?

Hello?

Yeah, it's Shannon.

How's Trevor doing?

He's terrific.

Having a ball.

Mommy's on the phone.

Hi.

Hey, how's it going?

I want to go home.

Oh, honey, it's just
a little while longer.

This isn't a really
nice Christmas Eve.

I know, mommy is not exactly
having a great time either.

Sometimes you got to do the things
you don't want to... that's life.

You are one smart cookie!

Don't say cookie!

Who wants cookies?

No thank you, no, no.

Hang tough sport.

I got it.

Ah, I got to go.

Mommy's client might be going
to the hospital.

Love you.

Love you too.

Are you okay?

I was never better.

I'm fine.

Listen Arthur,

why don't you look after Shannon,
keep her company for a while.

I'm fine.

But, you're going to start a riot.

Oh, nonsense.

Listen everyone, Mele kalikimaka!

That's what they say in Hawaii.

There we go.

...that's hindu.

Can't you stop him?

He's going to hurt himself.

Looks like he's having fun.

There's a man who deserves more.

Well it looks like we're
destined to be together

this fine Christmas Eve,

so you might as well tell me
your story, get it over with.

Well, not much to tell really.

Lawyer, loves to cook,
listens to country music,

there's just something about
a cowboy

with a broken heart
that gets to me.

How about you?

Classic story really.

A single mom, scraping by.

Came home to discover dentist husband

had run off
with peroxide blonde hygienist.

Ouch.

I guess he wanted someone
he talk teeth with.

All right there's plenty for everyone.

Joyeaux noel.

Somehow I'm giving off this vibe
that I need to be matched up.

What's with the textbook?

Oh, it's all part
of my big picture scheme.

Which is?

I get my C.P.A. license,
open my own business,

my son and I move to the burbs,
and I become a soccer mom.

Sounds like a good plan.

Troy and I want to adopt.

Troy?

My life partner.

He's a puppeteer.

Works on sesame street.

He's the back end of snuffalupagus.

Loves kids.

I thought that Nickells...

Didn't he want us to get together?

Apparently so.

Totally confused...

Well, I'm sure you've come
to realize by now

that what Mr. Nickells
wants, Mr. Nickells gets.

There you go, how's that.

That will buy you some balloons.

Still, that's a hell of a lot to ask.

Yes.

Listen everyone, Merry Christmas.

Skates Arthur, please.

What a workout.

I'd say.

Your mother loved to skate.

Another assumption?

All mothers love to skate?

No your mother grace, in particular.

You know she came that close
to qualifying for the olympics.

Now you're freaking me out.

How do you know my mother?

Shoes, Arthur?

Where are my shoes?

Thank you.

I knew your mother and your father,
God rest their souls.

My father?

Nuts!

Nuts?

Nuts.

Hey you're the news guy.

The news guy.

You here for the story?

I call it in.

We on the air?

Yeah.

Hey, live, yo Vinny, check it out,
I'm on the tube you big ape.

How do you like them apples?

I'll have a couple of
pretzels when your ready...

For me.

Can anybody tell me what happened?

Yeah, yeah sure. Get this.

A guy gives me $200
for a ten dollar buzz.

Then wishes me
Merry Christmas in polish

and then poof...
He's out the door.

This crazy guy was just throwing
hundred dollar bills around.

I got three off the ground.
Look ma!

The guy's nuts, but his money is real.

Just a pretzel you know,
quick pretzel actually...

I can get my money ready....

Anybody hear where he might be headed?

Sure, sure.

I heard him say he wanted
to go skating at the Plaza Rink.

Okay.

You go.

Come on let's go.

I want to get my pretzel...

Now, now, let's go.

Is he gonna throw more money there?

Hey man, and I was going
to call in sick today too...

Your nostrils are really flaring now.

Okay, just give it to me straight.

Well, it seems like
several lifetimes ago....

But we had just graduated
from business school....

Who?

Your father and me.

Two fresh, pressed young suits,
marching off to Wall St.

Wall St?
No, no. You're mistaken.

We worked
in the same brokerage house.

He was a likeable guy.
Quick with a joke and a smile.

You've got to be thinking
of someone else.

- Benjamin McMannus of Yonkers.
- Yeah.

Thick red hair,
wire framed glasses,

the fancy blue bowties.

Your mother, she worked in a
little tavern around the corner.

We had lunch there everyday.

- Martini's old time tavern.
- Yeah, Martini's.

That's where they met.

Oh, she was really something.

Once you ordered a drink from Grace
she remembered every time you came in.

She had this great laugh.

Every guy in the place
wanted to go out with her.

Including you?

She just had eyes for Ben.

I think that's the only
time i lost something

I really wanted.

This is incredible.

I had no idea my dad
worked on Wall St.

Well, he didn't for very long.

What happened?

He had a couple of setbacks

and just never pulled
himself together after that.

Your mother deserved better.

What did I say?

Hey, hey, wait, wait.

Wait, please.

Mr. Nickells, I will bill you
for the time you had

and you can call for another driver.

Wait.

No. You wait.

I don't need some total
stranger telling me

what my mother deserved
from my father.

I'm not a total stranger.

I knew Ben and Grace very well.

I don't know what sort of
perverse pleasure

you're getting here, but
I don't have to take it.

Please, my feet are very cold.

Thank you, Arthur.

You know today was no accident.

I wanted to meet you.

You're like a mirror to my past,

people I knew and things that I did.

Okay, so now you've met me,

you're paying me extra
and I get a big tip.

Now, can I get home to my son.

I've got an idea.

Call me crazy...

Ah, don't tempt me.

What if we went on a
shopping spree for your boy?

Wouldn't you like to wake up tomorrow
and see him discovering

everything that
his little heart desired?

There was this remote control
super bug I couldn't get him.

Okay.

What do you say
we bust out Newman's toy shop?

Okay, but then I go home.

And mirror or not,
no more talking about my parents.

Are we clear?

Well, you drive a tough bargain but...

Mind if we ask you a few questions?

Yes, we do.

Mr. Nickells doesn't wish
to be interviewed,

just give him his privacy.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Ladies and gentlemen,
what you've just witnessed

has been happening
all over the city this Christmas Eve.

Who is this Secret Santa
and why is he doing this?

I will be staying with
the story until I find out.

I'm Peter Archer, with WXMS News.

Okay, come on let's go.

This is really too much.

Do you have any of those super bikes?

Yes, sir.

Do you have any children yourself?

Two.

Better take a couple for them.

Thank you, sir.

That's hebrew for Merry Christmas,
go figure.

Hi boys and girls.
Hi.

Who here has been good?

Uh oh son.

What happened, you haven't been good?

I told a fib.

When my mommy asked who
glued popcorn to our dog

I said it was my baby brother,
on account of he can't talk yet.

Mmm... well did you set
the record straight?

Huh?

Did you tell the truth?

I just did.

I think you should tell your
mom what really happened

and tell your brother
that you're sorry

and you need to give your dog a treat.

That's a lot of work.

Yeah, so maybe you
won't tell fibs anymore.

Why don't you give me five?

Okay.

That was a great
lesson to teach a kid.

Listen, there is
one present in this store

that's here just for you.

You've got 30 seconds to find it.
Go!

He started before I said go...

I want all of these wrapped
and sent to this address.

But it's Christmas Eve.

But get it there by the end
of the business day

and we'll do something
very nice for your stocking.

He's quite the looker.

You just won't give up.

Friendly, on the rise in his firm,
make a good living...

Owns his own townhouse
in the village....

I'm sure he does.

I just want you to be happy.

I don't think Arthur's going
to push my happy button.

Arthur?

Exuse me, do you mind?

Don't do this.

Arthur, just man to man.

What do you think
of our Shannon McMannus?

She's fabulous.

If you don't tell him, I will.

Arthur?

Mr. Nickells, I'm involved.

Is it serious?

Well, we've made a life commitment

although the holidays are
rather stressful as Troy and I

always seem to fight over
whose parents we should visit.

Troy.

His life partner.

Cold enough for you?

Yeah, I like it, the cold.

Yeah, cuddling weather.

Oh right out of the box
with that one!

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I'm just temporarily caught
up in the Christmas spirit...

Makes you share intimate details
about yourself,

with strangers you probably
will never see again.

So what?

Got to love a woman in uniform.

Oh like I haven't heard
that a million times.

Oh yeah, it's pretty weak, huh?

You got a good face,
I'll give you another shot.

Peter Archer...
Merry Christmas.

Shannon McMannus, right back at ya.

Hey...
You're that News guy!

Hey, remember that thing
you did that time

with that guy...
I love that! Remember that?

Some of my best work...

..so...
Hey, hey, can I give you my 8 by 10..

I'm kind of an actor... You know,
maybe you could hook me up.

So this guy Nickells...

You're working with him right?

Yeah.

How long have you
been working for him?

About an hour and a half.

You know he's one of the richest men
in the city?

Has a fortune 500 brokerage house,
a big place out on the island...

Donald Trump goes to him for loans.

And your point with this?

What's a guy like that doing
throwing his money around?

It's Christmas, he's having fun.

Would you turn that thing off?

Sorry.

You know you don't need to come
barging at people with that attitude.

You can try asking nice.

Your right, I'm sorry.

I'm just on a deadline.

So your being charming was just
a front to get your story?

No, no, the charming part
was real.

Well, you got to try harder
than that with me Petie.

Oh, please, please
don't call me Petie.

My mom calls me Petie.

It drives me nuts.

I'll have to remember that.

Help me out.

What's Nickells' story?

Ask him yourself.

Boo!

Ah, Mr. Nickells...
Peter Archer, WXMS News,

mind if I ask you
a couple of questions?

Yes, he minds.

Oh, come on, help a guy out.

It's Christmas.

Who are the gifts for?

An orphanage or a shelter?

I have just two words for you,
my friend.

What did he say?

It's greek to me.

All right, now what?

I'm not giving up that easy.

Come on.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Ho, ho, ho, ho.

Hugo, let's go.

What about my dog?

Now...

I'm going on strike when this is over.

I'm striking I tell you!

Don't lose 'em.

He had some nerve that news guy.

You want me to slap a law suit on him?

No.

He is kind of cute.

He you like that kind
of studied perfection -

Piercing eyes...
Strong shoulders... Thick hair.

I mean if you're into
that sort of thing.

Nice smile.

Probably caps.

Yeah.

Stop the car.

What's the matter?

Hey, News boy.

You want an interview?
Come on, come on.

Hugo, drive.

I thought you wanted your privacy.

Don't you worry.

How's it going?

Drive, Shannon McMannus.

I've heard that the camera
adds 10 pounds.

Oh, you're fine, you're fine.
Janet?

Yeah. Stand by, we're rolling.

Mr. Nickells, what made you

want to lighten up your bank account
this Christmas Eve?

I really don't want to look fat.

Okay, okay, let's try that again.

Mr. Nickells, what made you want
to play "Secret Santa" today?

It's not exactly going to be a secret
if you broadcast this, now is it?

Well, no.

No, I guess not.

Okay, Mr. Nickells,
what made you want to do this?

Fred.

You're doing it for Fred?

No, call me Fred.

Oh, okay, okay, Fred.

All right, so why are
you doing this Fred?

Have you met my driver,
Shannon McMannus?

Quite the looker eh?

Yes, yes, she is.

Mr. Nickells, wouldn't your
money be put to better use

if turned over to, say, a charity?

No, I wouldn't dismiss a woman
like that quite so quickly.

They don't come along that often...

You can take it from a man who knows.

If I were you, I'd just ignore him.

You know, it's kind of hard
to ignore him...

I'm interviewing him.

How would you describe her?

Fred!

Well, she's got the kind of face
a man would be happy to come home to.

Did you get that on tape?

Yeah, I got it.

Great.

Probably
didn't get her blushing though.

Okay, can we just get back
to the story, here?

No.

Why?

We're here.

All right everyone.

Shall we?

You too Shannon McMannus.

Thank you Arthur.
You're welcome.

This way.

So, what do you think?

I know that they kind
of pulled my chain a little

on the price didn't they, Arthur?

Yes, well perhaps
if you hadn't have said

"I'll take it no matter
how much it is"...

I could fit my whole
apartment into this one room.

There's an upstairs!

Certainly, what good is a staircase
without an upstairs and a downstairs?

So Fred, when are you moving in?

Oh, I'm not.
She is.

Excuse me?

As they say in my favorite sushi bar..

Go ahead, open it.

It's all yours.

But...

Okay, just so I get this straight,
you've never met this man before?

No.

And he's just bought you a house?

Yes.

Okay, what's he up to?

You're the big shot
reporter, you tell me.

I'm sensing you don't have
much respect for my profession.

I haven't given your profession
much thought.

I can't take this house.

Can I?

Well, who's to say, maybe
it's your lucky day.

Of course, it is a bit big
for 1 person.

Two.

- Oh.
- Trevor.

- Husband?
- Son.

Do you ever stop digging?

Well, I don't know, maybe I was
hoping it was my lucky day, too.

Ah, Mr. Smooth.

I do what I can.

So how about you?

Probably engaged once
but she left you

because you spent
too much time on your job.

Left you broken hearted and you vowed
never to let that happen again

and now you throw yourself into a job,
just to avoid your own loneliness.

How am I doing?

Pretty good.

I would be a fool not
to take this house.

What would you do?

Sorry, got to remain objective.

Right, your story.

I'll put you down as no help at all.

You know, maybe there
is another angle here.

Like what?

Maybe the old man
has designs on you.

Wouldn't be the first time
that a man tried

to win a woman's heart by
buying her expensive gifts.

No, he's not like that.

I know when a guy is hitting on me.

If you say so.

Hey, are you hitting on me?

Is this going to turn into
some sort of indecent proposal?

Please.

Am I going to have to run
somebody over or something?

Why, you don't you think
I know people

who would run over other people?

This doesn't make any sense.

Well, you've got one minute
to make up your mind, okay.

I can't just...
Forty-five seconds...

You can't just...
Oh, that's thirty now...

It's a house...
Fifteen left...

Would you stop doing that?

Time's up!
Yes or no?

My furniture would look horrible
in that place.

How thoughtless of me.

I can get my decorator over here,
we'll give you some more neutral tones.

You'll be finished by tonight.

Janet, the tapes.
Hugo edit.

See what you've reduced me to?

I'm sucking ketchup.

Frank... Peter.

Listen, I need you to send a crew...

Another crew?

Yeah, get everyone
we can find who knows Nickells

and get him on camera.

Why?

Ask them if they think
he's lost his mind.

Fred Nickells...
You're kidding.

No, I'm not kidding,

this guy isn't within
driving distance of normal.

Can you go live?

Yeah, sure we can go live.

All we need is a five-minute warning.

Give us a five-minute warning.

Yeah, thanks.

Troy, your being peevish
isn't helping things.

Mrs. Granger?
Is everything all right?

No, it's not all right.

I know what we need.
Some Christmas carols.

Look 2 years in a row
we did your parents.

I can't take another new years in...

What? I can't hear you...

What's wrong?

No boca!

Everybody zip it!

Sorry.

I'll call you later.

Trevor, honey?

What's the matter?

You don't feel well.

What's wrong?
Is that your son?

Yeah, he's sick.

Arthur, you get Captain Finlay
on the phone immediately,

tell him
we need a police escort, stat!

Mommy's coming home.

Yes, Captain Finlay, please.

Arthur Finnegan, yes.

That's fine, that's fine, that's fine.

Hey, they're leaving!

Follow them, quick!

It's a good thing
I don't have anything in my stomach.

Ah, sorry, dude.

Does somebody want to tell me
what's going on?

Officer, there is a boy in that
building with a tummy ache!

Dispatch, this is 2-Adam-5,
we got a kid with a tummy ache?

That is correct.

I'll get back to you.

Peter?

We're live.

There she is, get that.

It's okay, he's fine.

Wonderful.

Tell you what folks.

Step on over here if you will.

Do a little seasonal business,
shall we?

Allow me to say...
and to all a...

Mr. Nickells, how does your family feel
about you giving away all this cash?

Well, you'd have to ask my daughter.

There you go.

Shannon didn't tell us
she was your daughter...

Uh, Merry Christmas.

Shannon, Shannon.

How do you feel about your father
giving away your inheritance?

My father?

Yeah, Fred Nickells has just told us
that he's your father.

He's not my father.

What are you doing
telling people you're my father?

You're not my father.

Well, I wanted to tell you sooner,
but I was afraid.

I certainly didn't want
to upset my grandson.

Wouldn't you like to give
your grandfather a little hug?

Do you mind?

Sorry.

You okay?

You're scaring a little boy.

Want to press charges?

She'll be fine.

I baked them myself.

I'm thinking with
the right entrepreneur behind me,

I could become another Mrs. Fields.

Who knows?

She ain't got nothing
on my shortbread.

Have one.

Very well.
Thank you.

I'll tell you what, madam.

Here is at least $1,000.

Promise me you'll never
bake cookies again. Ever!

Why are those people playing
outside our house?

And the policemen?

Can you make them
turn on their siren?

Trevor!

I'm sorry.

Are you made at me?

No, mommy is mad at someone else.

The funny man?

Yes.

We, we, we need to talk.

Mommy needs to talk to that man.

If you're mad, don't you need
a time out first?

I'm fine.

Wait here.

Are you nuts, saying something like
that in front of a television camera?

Well, I didn't realize
they were recording.

And what do you mean,
you're my father?

I know who my father is.

It's the same man that I've been
calling dad my entire life.

But actually the truth is...
I picked you up this morning,

and you're throwing money around,
and buying houses and toys... and...

Exactly, who the hell are you?

Well, it's a long...

I can't have this conversation.

I'm taking you back to the penthouse
and then I'm coming home with my boy

and we are going to decorate
our pathetic little Christmas tree

and I'm going to work very hard
to forget this day ever happened.

Don't you want to know?

No. I don't.
Get in the car.

Please.
Now!

Arthur, if you would be so kind.

Thank you once again.

All right folks, show's over.

Okay, let's go, let's go.

See, he likes them.

Come on, we're on the move.

Lady, I'd eat wallpaper right now.

Thanks a bunch.

Sheesh.

Officer, have a cookie!

How's your eye?

I'll live.

Ah, you're a trooper.

Hugo.

I think those cookies
had cement in them.

Edit, Janet.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, follow the limo.

Allison, what have you got for me?

I've got about half a
dozen people calling in

saying that Nickells
is their father too.

What?

And get this.

A source at Nickells' brokerage house
says about he flipped out.

What do you mean?

Oh, he showed up to
work in his bathrobe.

He spent the day
talking to the plants.

They shipped him off
to a sanatorium for 4 weeks,

then forced him into early retirement.

I knew it.

This Nickells guy is a whack job.

Maybe.

How many of these so-called children
do you think you can round up?

We've got three on camera so far.

Oh good, I'll blink them to us

and see if we can cut them
into the piece.

Is that him?

Peter, I called the network...

They want this for a national feed...

Plus a possible followup
on the morning News Show, tomorrow.

This is big.

Okay, I'm on it.

Janet,
start packing your bags for D.C..

We got the gig? Not for sure yet,
but I've got a good feeling about it.

Cool lady, kind of cute.

Too bad she's caught up
in this side show.

This guy came by and buys out
my whole cart.

Gives me 500 clams.

How did he act?

Like he blows his note with C-notes.

I should be so lucky.

Okay, now check this one out.

Yeah.

This Nickells' guy is my old man.

Daddy, come on down
and give me my allowance.

That's priceless.

It's Christmas.

Time to be together.

Papa, can you hear me?

Now this is my favourite,
my absolute favourite.

It's sad being tossed aside because
of your size, but I forgave him.

He's my pop, you know.

Gimme a minute, I'm an emotion wreck.

Mr. Nickells, dad,

Sonny Boy is working at Santa Land
until 6:00 -

Hope I see you there afterward.

That is good.

Okay, what do we want to do here?

I can splice all this in with
the hot limo driver getting ambushed.

Her name's Shannon.
We didn't ambush her.

We didn't?

How do you feel about your father
giving away your inheritance?

My father?

You're scaring a little boy,
do you mind?

Cut around that.

He's not my father.

It is a bit of a circus, isn't it.

Trevor, don't.

It's okay.

Hey Trevor, did you ever hear
the mating call of a reindeer?

No.

Hey toots, nice set of antlers!

You're funny.

I get that a lot, yeah.

Sit back down, Trevor.

It's okay really.

Trevor, get back here this instant.

Hey, it's all right.

Welcome to the back seat.

I like it back here.

Trevor make sure
you have your seatbelt on.

Mommy never lets me sit
in the back

on account of my hands
are always sticky.

Oh, yeah.

Tell you what?

Give me a high ten, okay.

Okay, atta boy.

Arthur.

Okay, so we all have
sticky hands back here.

Do you hear that?

We have a whole sticky-handed
crew of men back here.

You can't pull them apart can you?

They're too sticky.

Oh no, oh no.

No.

Oh no.

Help me, Arthur.

Help me please.

Thank you.

So silly.

Oh, now my hand is stuck in the hair.

Free at last, free at last.

That's sweden.

That a boy.

Mr. Nickells, quite a day you had, eh?

Seen you on the news.

Yes, yes.

Shannon, Shannon, I have
to talk to you about Fred.

Well, I don't want
to talk to you News boy.

Look, it's just me
this time, no camera,

no camera.
It's just me.

I know what that is.

Well, there's no use leaving it
wrapped then is there. Roger.

What?

He's not just eccentric,
he had a nervous breakdown.

Let's play.
How's that my problem?

Well, you better ask your mom.

It happened about a year ago,
right after your mother died.

How do you know about my mother?

That's what I do.
I find out things.

Mom.

Fred's co-workers said
he just chucked everything.

Career, company, cash...

Not now, honey.

I think the guy needs help.

Mom, can I play soccer?

Yes, just don't get dirty.

Yay!

Okay, let's go.

Roger, you be the goalie.

I'm sorry, but Fred is not my problem.

But what if he is your father?

He is not my father.

Ben McMannus was my father.

Besides he has his people.

No, no, he retired all his help.

Gave them fat pensions.

Arthur, is just hause he's.

Shoot, nice move.

Yes, yes.

I've got to get my son.

Trevor, Trevor, let's go.

But you said I could play.

Let's go.

Oh, no!

Never in my entire life
have I scored a goal in anything!

Now, who wants some hot chocolate?

Me!
Okay, let's go.

Trevor.

Roger. Nice match.

Thank you, sir.

Trevor, don't touch anything.

That's okay, we could probably
have a soccer match in here, eh?

Trevor, come on.

Do you like marshmallows?

What colour of marshmallows
do you like?

Do you like white ones?

Well, how about a toasty fire?

We'll have to figure out
how to make this thing work.

I used to have a fire guy...
But...

I need some straight answers.

Well, you deserve them.

Shoot.

Why are you lying
about being my father?

I am not lying.

You're going to have
to lay this out for me.

When Ben and Grace were dating,

he invested everything he had
into some oil field speculations,

then he went bust and
he just pushed Grace away..

Out of shame, I guess.

So what?
You came swooping in?

Well, your mother and I, we..

We did spend the weekend
together Saratoga,

watching horse races.

She was really something
the way she'd stand up in her seat

and just sort of yell her horse
across the finish line.

Anyway, that weekend...

We...

That's when you were...

You can skip the details.

Well, when Ben came to his senses,

he begged Grace to let him come back

and she really loved him,

so they were married within a month...

And I couldn't blame her.

Ben was a good man.

Lousy at business,
but good at other things.

Ben was all heart.

So did he know
that I wasn't his child?

Oh, Lord, no.

I promised, Grace.

It would have broken his heart.

I said I would never tell,
and that was that.

He died never knowing,

and then when your mother fell ill,

I went to visit her in the hospital

and that is when she gave me
her blessing to meet you.

I realized how much I had missed...

I didn't see you grow up.

Why didn't my mother
want me to know you before that?

Well, see...

I was the one who convinced Ben
to invest in those oil fields.

I was young, brash, thought
I could smell oil in the dirt.

Made a mistake,

and the truth is

that some part of me was happy,
I guess,

when he lost everything.

See I wanted Grace

and I thought,
if Ben didn't have any money,

then she'd want me instead of him.

So that's what this day was about?

Trying to buy my love the way
you tried to buy my mother's?

No, no.

You think that giving me
your money makes up

for what you did to my father?

No, I know that doesn't work.

Then what?

Money means nothing.

I would give it all away.

I just want a family.

My family.

Get this straight.

Trevor and I, aren't your family.

We will never be your family.

So just take all your riches

and Merry friggin' Christmas.

Let's go.

But I don't want to go.

Well, we have to get home
to decorate the tree.

Hey, hey, wwwait.

Why? So you can get more misery
for the eleven o'clock News?

Shannon what's up?
Talk to me.

You can roll on this...

Fred Nickells is a cheat and a thief

and I'm going to get a
restraining order against him.

That's the ending to your story.

Tick-tock guys.

Ten more minutes.

Get five or else
there's going to be a black hole

in the middle of the broadcast.

Get out!

Okay, that's good.
Play it back.

Now, I just need an ending.

I said out.

I guess I had that coming.

Hey little fella,
want to photocopy your face?

Can I?

Yes, just don't get in anyone's way.

Let's go.

I got halfway home and
I had to come back.

What I said about Nickells?

I was pissed.

I don't want you to hurt him.

Oh, talk about a 180.

I know.

And I know that that
sleazy exploitation

makes for a better story, but
I don't want you to use it, please.

He suffered enough.

So why the sudden turn?

I guess I just want it all to be over.

That's a lot to ask here
at the last minute.

Had to give it a shot.

You know I looked at Nickells
and you know what I see?

I see a guy
who has pretty much gotten

everything he ever wanted in life,
but nothing he really needed.

Must have been tough
for him all these years

watching his only kid grow up,
not even being able to talk to her.

Well, he did a dandy job
of trying to make up for it today.

I guess he didn't get much practice
on his human relationships.

But then again,
we've all built our walls.

What?

You're saying
that it runs in the family?

You know, I judge people
on their actions.

Fred Nickells used his power
to ruin my father.

He broke his spirit.

That's not something I can forget.

You know what, just do
what ever you want with the story.

Oh wait...
You...

Hey, eat first.
Tree, second.

TV?

Sure.

Which one is that?

That's grand pop, grand mom and me,
when I was about your age.

I remember that one.

It's the funny man.

Well, I have had quite
a day following around

this city's Secret Santa,
surprises at every turn.

But he saved the biggest
surprise for last..

The reason why he was doing it.

I want to see.

I do it for the most
selfish reason imagined.

It's us!

I do it for the smiles.

Seeing the pleasure on a child's face
receiving a new toy...

A mother getting enough cash
to pay the next month's rent...

...it's addictive.

You can get hooked, too.

Try baking a cake
for a neighbour you've never met,

or buying a meal
for a homeless person,

help a stranger fix a flat tire.

Because, you know,
at the end of the day,

all we really have is each other.

We're all family.

It couldn't be more simple than that.

I'm Peter Archer.
Have yourselves a Merry Christmas.

Or as they say in Romania...
"S�rb�tori vesele!"

Now all you kids out there get to bed
because Santa is on his way.

Yo, Mr. N?

Over here.

Merry Christmas.

Well, look at that?

Are those gifts going
to the usual place again this year?

Yes.

It's been what? Six or seven
years you're doing this,

that's got to be
the biggest haul yet Mr. N.

Roger if you could call a cab,
and pack them up for delivery.

We're going to need three.

I'll get right on it.

Oh yeah, the Mrs. Wanted me
to give you this.

It's a fruit cake.

I know what you're probably thinking,

that we got this and we're
probably passing it along,

but she did make it fresh.

Oh, that's very thoughtful.

Please thank your wife for me, Roger.

I will, sir.

If you don't mind my saying so Mr. N,
you look pretty blue.

Let me take a guess.
Is it family?

Yeah.

Holidays. Supposed to be
this great time and all that,

but I think
it just drives people mental.

And you know, in the end
after all the yelling

and screaming and fighting
over who carves the turkey,

it can be pretty nice.

No matter what you always want
to hold on

to those Christmas smiles.

Roger, call 4 cabs.
I'm going to need one.

Yes, sir.

Thanks mom.

Hello?

Peter?
It's crazy down here.

The phones are ringing off the hook.

People are tripping over themselves
to be nice to each other.

Giving stuff away.

Pinning it on this Nickells guy.

I need you to get
a followup with him.

Well, it just so happens

I don't have anything else
to this morning.

Yeah, well you're going to
have some packing to do.

That D.C. gig you've been
busting my chops about, it's yours.

You hear me? Peter?

You know, I think I'm just going
to stay here.

We must have a bad connection.

Did you just say...?

Yeah, I'm recommending
Lauren for the job.

But don't tell her I said that.

It'll be our little secret.

I don't get it.

What gives?

Let's just say, this city seems
a little more attractive this morning.

Bye.

If you're looking for Mr. Nickells,
you just missed him.

Where'd he go?

I don't know
if I should say anything.

Mr. Nickells has been keeping
this on the Q/T for years.

It's like you said on
your thing last night,

just do good stuff.

Can you help me out with this please?

It's important.

Well, all right,
but you didn't hear it from me.

Thanks.

Hey look.

Hey, that looks great.

What did your daddy send you?

Daddy sent me a junior dental kit.

Can I scrub Mrs. Granger's cat
with this?

Sure.

So you're not disappointed
you didn't get a super bike?

It's okay.

I just like having you for my present.

And I got to ride
in the back of the limo.

Come here you.

Have I told you lately
how special you are?

I'll get it.

It's the TV guy.

His name is Mr. Archer.

TV guy is fine.

How's your Christmas, Trevor?

Awesome. We were on TV, last night.

Okay, okay.

Hi.

Hi.

Somebody missing a hat?

You know I've tried
to lose that thing

about a hundred times and
it just keeps coming back.

And thank you, by the way,
for not...

No problem, I just told what
needed to be told, that's all.

You want coffee?

Yeah, I'd like that.

I hope you like instant.

Maybe tea?

Would you settle for hot chocolate?

Sure.

Hey, is this you?

Yeah.

You know I've been up all
night looking at this thing.

I think maybe Ben knew all along

that I wasn't his daughter,
but he never let on.

He never loved me any less.

I was Grace's daughter
and that's all he needed.

We were happy.

Poor, but happy.

There's nothing wrong with that.

Nothing at all.

I still can't figure out
why my mom changed her mind

and let Nickells off the hook.

I'd like to take you somewhere.

Right now?

You're going to want to see this.

Guys, you've got some gifts
right over there.

Ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas.

Hey, look.
It's the funny man.

Apparently this isn't the first year
Fred decided to play Secret Santa.

Merry Christmas, are you here to help,
or do you need help?

I'm not sure why we're here.

Well all are welcome at
the McMannus family centre.

McMannus?

Mhm.

We're a halfway house for families
who have fallen on hard times.

We provide a safe place,
food, job training...

I'm Peter Archer, WXMS News.

I knew it was you!

Wow, you're even better looking
in person.

Thank you.

I was hoping to do
a story on your shelter.

Yeah, let me show you around.

Meet some of the people.

You built this place, didn't you?

Why didn't you say something,
yesterday?

A little hard for a gift
to remain anonymous

if people know about it.

You did it in '94?

Yeah, after Ben died.

I wanted him to have a legacy
and Grace found out

just before she passed this year.

And that's why she forgave you
and said that you could contact me?

I guess so.

Mom look,
it's the super bike I asked Santa for.

Wow!

I guess Santa
got his addresses confused.

So what do we say?

Do you have any batteries?

You know it's like a miracle!
They're included.

Let's race him around the tree.

Okay, that sounds like a great idea.

Yeah okay, we'll set up for a crew
to come in some time next week.

Okay.

I want to thank you
for bringing me here.

Actually I have a confession to make.

I don't think
I can handle anymore confessions.

I broke a rule of journalism.

Which is?

Never get personally involved
with the subject of your story.

You know he's gonna find a way
to make us go out

and I'm going to find it pretty hard
to say no.

Well, just to keep him quiet,
maybe we could go for lunch.

Or dinner.

But your reputation might be ruined.

No super reporter awards for you.

I'm willing to take that chance
if you are.

That latin...

Old school...

And speaking of old school...

Mistletoe...

This means kissing.

Merry Christmas, Fred.

Dad.