All language subtitles for Friends S02E01.en

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal) Download
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:52,051 Flight number 457 from Beijing now arriving. 2 00:00:58,308 --> 00:01:01,477 Oh, my God. 3 00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:05,397 Oh, my... Excuse me. Move, move, move! Emergency, please! 4 00:01:05,607 --> 00:01:07,024 Excuse me, excuse me. 5 00:01:13,865 --> 00:01:15,908 - Rach! - Ah! 6 00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:17,534 There you are! 7 00:01:17,702 --> 00:01:19,620 - Hey! - Hi! 8 00:01:19,829 --> 00:01:22,831 Oh! So, so. 9 00:01:22,999 --> 00:01:25,793 How was China? You! 10 00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:29,338 It was... It was great. Oh, what happened? 11 00:01:29,506 --> 00:01:31,256 - What? I am? - You're bleeding. 12 00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:33,050 - God. - Oh, look at that! Yes, I am. Heh. 13 00:01:33,218 --> 00:01:36,303 Enough about me, Mr. Back From The Orient! 14 00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:40,140 Come on, I wanna hear everything. Everything! 15 00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:44,103 Well, uh, where do I start? Um... 16 00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:48,440 This is Julie. Uh, Julie, this is Rachel. 17 00:01:48,608 --> 00:01:51,276 Hi. Heh. 18 00:01:51,444 --> 00:01:53,487 Uh, oh! These are... 19 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:56,281 - These are... Aren't for you. - Oh. 20 00:01:56,449 --> 00:01:59,284 Heh. Uh, these are for you. 21 00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:02,329 Welcome to our country. 22 00:02:04,332 --> 00:02:07,709 Thank you. I'm from New York. 23 00:02:10,171 --> 00:02:13,715 Well, not a problem. We'll use them to stop the bleeding. 24 00:02:14,425 --> 00:02:16,844 Okay. Uh, baggage claim? 25 00:02:17,011 --> 00:02:18,512 - Okay. - Okay. 26 00:02:24,060 --> 00:02:26,478 - No way. - I'm telling you, she went to the airport. 27 00:02:26,646 --> 00:02:28,438 And she's gonna go for it with Ross. 28 00:02:28,606 --> 00:02:32,651 Oh, my God. This is huge. This... 29 00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:35,070 This is bigger than huge. This is... 30 00:02:35,238 --> 00:02:37,322 All right, what's bigger than huge? 31 00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:40,868 - Um, this? - Yes. 32 00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:43,453 Guys, you got new haircuts! 33 00:02:43,621 --> 00:02:45,789 Yes, yes, we did. Thanks to Vidal Buffay. 34 00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:48,750 Because, you know: 35 00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:51,253 "If you don't look good, we don't look good." 36 00:02:51,421 --> 00:02:53,505 I love that voice! Ha, ha. 37 00:02:54,382 --> 00:02:56,508 - You guys! - Oh, oh. 38 00:02:56,676 --> 00:02:59,094 Airport. Airport. Ross. 39 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:00,762 Not... Not alone. 40 00:03:00,930 --> 00:03:04,057 Julie. Arm around her! 41 00:03:04,225 --> 00:03:07,895 Unh! Cramp! Cramp! Cramp! 42 00:03:08,062 --> 00:03:10,689 Okay, I think she's trying to tell us something. 43 00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:13,025 Quick, get the verbs. 44 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:15,444 - Ow. - You! You! 45 00:03:15,612 --> 00:03:17,112 You said he liked me! 46 00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:18,822 You! You...! 47 00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:21,450 You slowpokes! 48 00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:24,494 That's all right, Rach. We got the bags. Uh... 49 00:03:24,662 --> 00:03:26,580 Hi. Hello. 50 00:03:27,790 --> 00:03:30,792 Julie, this is my sister, Monica. This is Chandler. 51 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:32,878 - Hey. - Phoebe, hi. Mwah. 52 00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:34,963 - Joey, what up? - Hey. 53 00:03:35,506 --> 00:03:38,717 - Everyone, this is Julie. - Julie. 54 00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:41,178 Oh. 55 00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:44,932 Hi! 56 00:03:45,099 --> 00:03:47,184 Hi! But I'm not here, you haven't met me. 57 00:03:47,352 --> 00:03:50,896 I'll make a better impression when I don't have 20 hours of plane on me. 58 00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:53,065 - And bus. - Oh, my God! 59 00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,442 - With the screaming guy... - And the spitting. 60 00:03:55,610 --> 00:03:57,736 You gotta hear this story. 61 00:03:57,904 --> 00:04:00,030 We're on this bus that's 200 years old. 62 00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:01,865 Two hundred, at least. 63 00:04:02,033 --> 00:04:05,494 - And this guy... - And the chicken poops in her lap! Ha! 64 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,834 Oh, I'm so sorry. 65 00:04:13,002 --> 00:04:15,212 I just gave away the ending, didn't I? 66 00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:17,673 Ugh, I just heard this story in the cab... 67 00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:21,677 ...and it is all I can think about. 68 00:04:24,138 --> 00:04:26,807 This is amazing. I mean, how...? 69 00:04:26,975 --> 00:04:30,060 - How did this happen? - Ross and I were in grad school together. 70 00:04:30,228 --> 00:04:33,480 We haven't seen each other since then. I land in China... 71 00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:36,942 ...guess who's in charge of the dig? - Julie! 72 00:04:38,611 --> 00:04:39,987 Julie. Isn't that great? 73 00:04:40,571 --> 00:04:45,200 Isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic? 74 00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:49,329 It's an expression. 75 00:04:50,206 --> 00:04:52,207 We just wanted to say a quick hi. 76 00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:54,960 - Then we're gonna go see the baby. - Then get some sleep. 77 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:57,546 Yeah, it's 6:00 tomorrow night, our time. 78 00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,840 Well don't tell us what's gonna happen, though 79 00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:01,800 Because I like to be surprised. 80 00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:07,723 - Bye! - Bye. 81 00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:20,485 - Rach. Can I get some coffee? Thank you. - Sure. 82 00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:22,362 - Hey, Rach... - Did you talk to him yet? 83 00:05:22,530 --> 00:05:24,448 - No. - Then, no. 84 00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:39,338 So, what the hell happened to you in China? 85 00:05:39,505 --> 00:05:42,674 I mean, when last we left you, you were in love with, you know. 86 00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:45,093 I know. I know I was. 87 00:05:45,261 --> 00:05:47,929 But there was always this voice inside that kept saying: 88 00:05:48,097 --> 00:05:52,184 "It's never gonna happen. Move on." You know whose voice that was? 89 00:05:52,935 --> 00:05:54,269 God? 90 00:05:55,229 --> 00:05:56,855 It was you, pal. 91 00:05:57,857 --> 00:05:59,691 Well, maybe it was God doing me. 92 00:06:01,235 --> 00:06:05,113 You were right. She looks at me and sees a friend. That's all. 93 00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:07,991 And then I met Julie, and... 94 00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:09,993 I don't know. We're having a great time. 95 00:06:10,161 --> 00:06:14,456 I never would have gone for it with her, if it hadn't been for you. 96 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:18,293 Well, you owe me one, big guy. 97 00:06:19,003 --> 00:06:21,421 - Here's your lemonade. - I didn't order lemonade. 98 00:06:21,589 --> 00:06:24,508 Oh. Well then you better go take that back. 99 00:06:24,675 --> 00:06:26,259 They're gonna charge you for that. 100 00:06:26,427 --> 00:06:28,929 - But... - Go, go, go! Come on, come on! 101 00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:33,225 Okay, so, uh, what did you find out? 102 00:06:34,018 --> 00:06:37,062 He said... 103 00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:42,526 He said they're having a great time. 104 00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:45,028 - I'm sorry. - What? 105 00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:47,864 But the silver lining, if you wanna see it... 106 00:06:48,032 --> 00:06:51,493 ...is that he made this decision all by himself... 107 00:06:51,661 --> 00:06:54,663 ...without any outside help whatsoever. 108 00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:57,833 How is that a silver lining? 109 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,627 You have to really wanna see it. 110 00:07:06,300 --> 00:07:09,094 Ironically, these guys were picked last in gym. 111 00:07:10,179 --> 00:07:11,763 Hey, Pheebs. 112 00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:14,808 - You know what I'm thinking? - Oh, okay. 113 00:07:18,729 --> 00:07:20,355 How... 114 00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:23,233 ...it's been so long since you've had sex... 115 00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:25,944 ...you're wondering if they've changed it? 116 00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:30,740 No. Although now that's what I'm thinking. 117 00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:33,869 So, what were you thinking? 118 00:07:34,036 --> 00:07:36,496 I was thinking you gave the guys great haircuts. 119 00:07:36,664 --> 00:07:38,206 I thought you'd like to do mine. 120 00:07:38,374 --> 00:07:40,083 Oh! No. 121 00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:44,337 - Why not? - Because I'm just... 122 00:07:44,505 --> 00:07:48,049 I'm incredibly anal and an unbelievable control freak. 123 00:07:48,217 --> 00:07:49,759 No, you're not. 124 00:07:49,927 --> 00:07:51,803 I know I'm not, but you are. 125 00:07:52,263 --> 00:07:54,097 I was trying to spare your feelings. 126 00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:58,059 Hello? Oh, hi. 127 00:07:58,227 --> 00:08:01,104 Yeah, hold on a second. Ross, Julie for you. 128 00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:06,443 Hello? Hi. 129 00:08:07,236 --> 00:08:09,779 Hey. Anybody know a good tailor? 130 00:08:09,947 --> 00:08:11,990 - You need clothes altered? - No, no. 131 00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:14,868 I'm just looking for a man to draw on me with chalk. 132 00:08:15,786 --> 00:08:18,914 Go see Frankie. My family's been going to him forever. 133 00:08:19,081 --> 00:08:20,999 He did my first suit when I was 15. 134 00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:23,543 No, wait, 16. 135 00:08:23,711 --> 00:08:27,380 No, excuse me, heh, 15. 136 00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:30,842 All right, when was 1990? 137 00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:36,014 Okay, you have to stop the Q-Tip when there's resistance. 138 00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:46,441 Okay. Okay. Sweetheart, I'll see you later. 139 00:08:47,818 --> 00:08:49,653 Okay, bye. What? 140 00:08:50,571 --> 00:08:53,448 Oh, that is so sweet. 141 00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,993 No... Ha, ha. 142 00:08:57,161 --> 00:08:59,246 No. Okay. No, you hang up. 143 00:08:59,413 --> 00:09:01,122 No, you... Okay. 144 00:09:01,290 --> 00:09:04,960 Okay. One, two, three. 145 00:09:05,127 --> 00:09:07,003 Shh. 146 00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:10,966 Well you didn't hang up either. She didn't hang up. 147 00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:17,681 Okay, no. No, you hang up. 148 00:09:17,848 --> 00:09:20,600 You. You. Yo... 149 00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:31,611 Sorry, I thought you were talking to me. 150 00:09:33,739 --> 00:09:35,365 - Rachel. Heh. - Sorry. 151 00:09:35,533 --> 00:09:37,784 - I'll just call her back. - Okay. 152 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:41,371 Hi, sweetie. I'm sorry. We got disconnected. 153 00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:42,831 No, you hang up. 154 00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:45,333 Okay, okay, okay. How did this happen to me? How? 155 00:09:45,501 --> 00:09:48,336 A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine. 156 00:09:48,504 --> 00:09:51,298 Ross was just Ross. Just this guy. 157 00:09:51,465 --> 00:09:55,010 Now all of a sudden, he's Ross... 158 00:09:55,636 --> 00:09:59,764 ...ugh, this really great guy that I can't have. 159 00:10:00,057 --> 00:10:02,267 Sweetie, I wanted you to have him too. 160 00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:03,602 I know you did. 161 00:10:05,146 --> 00:10:08,148 Ugh. I'm just gonna deal with it. I'm just gonna deal with it 162 00:10:11,527 --> 00:10:13,570 I gotta get out of here! 163 00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:20,035 I don't care what you guys say. Something's bothering her. 164 00:10:25,333 --> 00:10:28,126 You know, I think I was 16. 165 00:10:30,254 --> 00:10:33,048 Please, just a little bit off the back. 166 00:10:33,215 --> 00:10:34,549 Um, I'm still on "no." 167 00:10:37,011 --> 00:10:38,928 - Uh, morning. - Hey. 168 00:10:39,096 --> 00:10:41,097 Could you close your eyes for a sec? 169 00:10:41,265 --> 00:10:44,434 Oh, no, no, no. I'm not falling for that again. 170 00:10:46,854 --> 00:10:50,106 - What's going on? - I sort of did a stupid thing last night. 171 00:10:50,274 --> 00:10:52,067 What stupid thing did you do? 172 00:10:54,278 --> 00:10:55,862 Ew! 173 00:11:02,536 --> 00:11:04,537 Why don't you just go get dressed... 174 00:11:05,122 --> 00:11:08,208 ...then you'll be on your way. Bye-bye. 175 00:11:09,418 --> 00:11:11,044 Rachel, how did this happen? 176 00:11:11,212 --> 00:11:13,546 I don't know, I kind of ran into him last night. 177 00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:15,090 - Where? - At his apartment. 178 00:11:15,257 --> 00:11:16,800 Is this juice? 179 00:11:17,426 --> 00:11:21,179 Whoa. And the fact that you dumped him because he hit on Phoebe? 180 00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:24,474 Oh, God, I know. I'm pathetic, I'm a loser. 181 00:11:25,309 --> 00:11:27,894 Honey, you're not pathetic. You're just sad. 182 00:11:28,062 --> 00:11:30,438 Yeah. People do stupid things when they're upset. 183 00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:33,692 My God, if I had a nickel for every guy I wish I hadn't... 184 00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:40,323 But this is about your horrible mistake. 185 00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:43,910 - Hi. - Hey! 186 00:11:44,078 --> 00:11:46,246 - Hi... - Sorry we're late. 187 00:11:46,414 --> 00:11:47,664 We were, uh... 188 00:11:47,832 --> 00:11:50,166 Well, there was touching. 189 00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:55,547 - Hey...! - Oh. 190 00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:58,216 - Hey, Ross! - Paolo. Ha. 191 00:11:58,384 --> 00:11:59,718 What a... 192 00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:03,304 What, uh...? What are you doing here? 193 00:12:03,472 --> 00:12:05,306 - I do Raquel. - Ah. 194 00:12:11,689 --> 00:12:13,481 So, uh, he's back? 195 00:12:13,649 --> 00:12:16,234 Yeah, he's back. Is that a problem? 196 00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:17,861 No, not a problem. 197 00:12:18,487 --> 00:12:20,363 Good. Glad it's not a problem. 198 00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:23,908 Okay, you're gonna have to not touch my ass. 199 00:12:27,121 --> 00:12:31,458 Well, despite the yummy bagels and palpable tension... 200 00:12:31,625 --> 00:12:33,585 ...I've got pants that need to be altered. 201 00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:37,297 Oh, when you see Frankie, tell him Joey Tribbiani says hello. 202 00:12:37,465 --> 00:12:39,132 He'll know what it means. 203 00:12:41,469 --> 00:12:44,220 You sure he's gonna be able to crack that code? 204 00:12:45,514 --> 00:12:49,642 It's funny. The last time Paolo was here, my hair was so much shorter and cuter. 205 00:12:50,311 --> 00:12:52,395 All right. Okay. 206 00:12:52,563 --> 00:12:57,066 But... But! You have to promise that you will not be all controlly and bossy... 207 00:12:57,234 --> 00:13:00,028 ...and all, you know, Monica about it. 208 00:13:00,654 --> 00:13:01,738 I promise. 209 00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:03,573 All right, let's see. 210 00:13:03,741 --> 00:13:07,911 Now, some of you are gonna get cut and some of you aren't. 211 00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:11,289 But I promise, none of you will feel a thing. 212 00:13:12,583 --> 00:13:13,958 Okay. 213 00:13:25,095 --> 00:13:28,389 - All right, that's it. I quit. - What? I didn't say anything! 214 00:13:28,557 --> 00:13:32,310 Yeah, but this isn't the face of a person who trusts a person. 215 00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:35,396 This is the face of a person who, you know... 216 00:13:35,564 --> 00:13:37,690 ...doesn't trust a person. 217 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,485 I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Phoebe. 218 00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:44,405 It's just a little shorter than what we had discussed. 219 00:13:44,573 --> 00:13:48,076 Would you relax? I know what I am doing. 220 00:13:48,244 --> 00:13:50,870 This is how he wears it. 221 00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:55,458 - How who wears it? - Demi Moore. 222 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:58,503 Heh. Demi Moore is not a he. 223 00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:01,422 Well, he was a he in Arthur and in 10. 224 00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:05,134 That's Dudley Moore! 225 00:14:05,302 --> 00:14:08,096 I said I wanted it like Demi Moore! 226 00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:10,974 - Oh. Oh! - Oh, my God! 227 00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:14,143 - Oh, God! - Oh, my God! 228 00:14:14,311 --> 00:14:16,688 Oh, my God! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! 229 00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:18,231 Which one is Demi Moore? 230 00:14:18,399 --> 00:14:23,278 She's the actress that was in Disclosure, Indecent Proposal, Ghost! 231 00:14:23,445 --> 00:14:25,113 Oh, she's got gorgeous hair. 232 00:14:25,281 --> 00:14:27,490 - I know! - Oh, my God! 233 00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:35,957 How long do you want the cuffs? 234 00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:38,877 At least as long as I have the pants. 235 00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:44,465 I just got that. 236 00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:49,846 Okay. Now we'll do your inseam. 237 00:15:03,402 --> 00:15:05,028 How is she? 238 00:15:05,696 --> 00:15:07,614 It's too soon to tell. 239 00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:11,367 She's resting, which is a good sign. 240 00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:15,288 - How's the hair? - I'm not gonna lie to you, Ross. 241 00:15:15,456 --> 00:15:17,206 It doesn't look good. 242 00:15:19,084 --> 00:15:22,295 I put a clip on one side, which seems to have stopped the curling. 243 00:15:24,173 --> 00:15:25,298 Can we see her? 244 00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:28,009 Your hair looks too good. It would upset her. 245 00:15:29,386 --> 00:15:31,387 Ross, why don't you come on in. 246 00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:40,980 - Well, how you doing? - I'm okay. 247 00:15:41,148 --> 00:15:43,608 - Ooh, that bad, huh? - What? 248 00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:47,278 Look, I can sense when women are depressed and vulnerable. 249 00:15:47,446 --> 00:15:49,948 It's one of my gifts. Sit. 250 00:15:51,408 --> 00:15:52,784 Ugh. 251 00:15:53,827 --> 00:15:57,956 Ugh, Joey, when I saw him get off that plane with her... 252 00:15:58,123 --> 00:16:01,417 ...I really thought I just hit rock bottom. 253 00:16:01,585 --> 00:16:05,129 But today, it's like there's rock bottom... 254 00:16:05,297 --> 00:16:07,256 ...50 feet of crap... 255 00:16:07,424 --> 00:16:09,342 ...then me. 256 00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:11,928 You gotta tell Ross how you feel. 257 00:16:12,096 --> 00:16:15,223 Oh, come on, how can I just tell him? What about Julie? 258 00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:18,267 What about her? They've only been going out for two weeks. 259 00:16:18,435 --> 00:16:21,729 Ross has been in love with you for 10 years. 260 00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:25,108 - I don't know. I don't know. - Look, Rach, Rach. 261 00:16:25,275 --> 00:16:27,694 I've been with my share of women. 262 00:16:28,320 --> 00:16:31,239 I've been with a lot of people's share of women. 263 00:16:32,199 --> 00:16:33,825 But the point is... 264 00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:38,121 ...I've never felt about anyone the way Ross felt about you. 265 00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:41,666 Really? 266 00:16:48,382 --> 00:16:50,091 Yo, paisan. 267 00:16:52,678 --> 00:16:54,804 Can I talk to you for a sec? 268 00:16:58,225 --> 00:16:59,809 Your tailor... 269 00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:02,395 ...is a very bad man! 270 00:17:04,481 --> 00:17:07,734 - Frankie? What are you talking about? - Hey, what's going on? 271 00:17:12,990 --> 00:17:14,449 Joey's tailor... 272 00:17:18,245 --> 00:17:19,829 ...took advantage of me. 273 00:17:21,248 --> 00:17:23,041 - What? - No way. 274 00:17:23,208 --> 00:17:25,543 I've been going to the guy for 12 years. 275 00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:27,879 Oh, come on. He said he was gonna do my inseam. 276 00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:31,716 Then he ran his hand up my leg and then there was definite... 277 00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:33,301 What? 278 00:17:33,844 --> 00:17:35,470 Cupping. 279 00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:41,142 That's how they do pants! 280 00:17:42,603 --> 00:17:45,229 First they go up one side, they move it over. 281 00:17:45,397 --> 00:17:49,484 Then they go up the other side, move it back, then they do the rear. 282 00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:55,364 What? Ross, tell him. Isn't that how a tailor measures pants? 283 00:17:55,532 --> 00:17:57,617 Yes, yes, it is. In prison! 284 00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:06,751 What's the matter with you? 285 00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:08,377 What? 286 00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:13,257 That's not? 287 00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:20,973 Oh, my God. 288 00:18:27,898 --> 00:18:30,274 Even Mary Tyler Moore would've been better. 289 00:18:32,903 --> 00:18:34,362 I like it. 290 00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:36,197 Yeah, I do. I think it's a 10! 291 00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:42,578 Thank you. My hair is very amused. 292 00:18:42,746 --> 00:18:45,498 Oh, come on, things could be worse. I mean, uh... 293 00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:48,417 You could "get caught between the moon and New York City. 294 00:18:51,004 --> 00:18:52,839 I know it's crazy, but it's true." 295 00:18:55,634 --> 00:18:57,260 Thank you. 296 00:18:57,427 --> 00:18:59,595 - Well, I gotta go. Bye. - See you. 297 00:18:59,763 --> 00:19:01,055 Bye, Rach! 298 00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:02,890 Wait, are you leaving? 299 00:19:03,058 --> 00:19:05,518 That's what I meant by "bye." 300 00:19:05,686 --> 00:19:07,854 Well, uh, can I talk to you for a sec? 301 00:19:08,021 --> 00:19:09,480 Okay. 302 00:19:11,650 --> 00:19:14,777 When the doctor does that hernia test... 303 00:19:15,529 --> 00:19:17,071 That's okay. 304 00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:22,326 - What's going on? - Um... 305 00:19:23,370 --> 00:19:26,914 - Well, um, okay, first of all... - Mm-hm. 306 00:19:27,082 --> 00:19:30,001 ...Paolo and I are not back together. 307 00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:31,961 That was a stupid thing I did. 308 00:19:32,129 --> 00:19:35,298 If I could go back in time and do it again... 309 00:19:35,465 --> 00:19:37,633 ...well, I wouldn't. 310 00:19:37,801 --> 00:19:39,760 - Ahem. - Um... 311 00:19:39,928 --> 00:19:41,971 - Heh. - Second of all... 312 00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:44,557 What? 313 00:19:44,975 --> 00:19:48,227 Before I say anything... 314 00:19:48,395 --> 00:19:51,230 ...is this one of those things where you break up with a guy. 315 00:19:51,398 --> 00:19:52,857 Then I tell you what I think... 316 00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:55,443 ...and the next day you get back together with him... 317 00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:58,446 ...and I look like a complete idiot? - No, no, no. 318 00:19:58,614 --> 00:20:01,991 Okay. Um, well, then, I think the guy's scum. 319 00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:06,621 I hate him. I mean, I actually... I physically hate him. 320 00:20:07,873 --> 00:20:09,165 You know? I always have. 321 00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:13,336 And you are way too good to be with a guy like that. 322 00:20:14,254 --> 00:20:15,755 - Really? - Rach? 323 00:20:15,923 --> 00:20:18,549 You deserve to be with someone who appreciates you... 324 00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:21,010 ...and who gets how funny... 325 00:20:21,178 --> 00:20:23,679 ...and sweet and amazing... 326 00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:26,974 ...and adorable and sexy you are. 327 00:20:27,142 --> 00:20:30,770 You know? Someone who wakes up every morning thinking: 328 00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:34,649 "Oh, my God. I'm with Rachel!" Heh. 329 00:20:34,816 --> 00:20:37,735 You know? Someone who makes you feel good. 330 00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:40,071 Like the way I do with Julie. 331 00:20:45,827 --> 00:20:48,329 Was there a "second of all"? 332 00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:51,707 Um... 333 00:20:52,918 --> 00:20:57,129 No, um, I think that was the whole "all." 334 00:20:59,299 --> 00:21:00,967 I gotta go. Okay? 335 00:21:01,134 --> 00:21:03,636 - Okay. - Thanks. 336 00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:05,846 Okay. 337 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,187 No, I swear to God, Dad! 338 00:21:13,355 --> 00:21:15,481 That's not how they measure pants! 339 00:21:22,906 --> 00:21:26,492 I was thinking of doing it shorter, like Andie MacDowell's haircut. 340 00:21:26,702 --> 00:21:28,536 - Oh, yeah. Oh, I could do that. - Really? 341 00:21:28,704 --> 00:21:31,247 - Yeah. You wanna do it now? - Great! 342 00:21:31,415 --> 00:21:33,124 - Okay. - Okay. 343 00:21:33,625 --> 00:21:34,875 See you. 344 00:21:35,460 --> 00:21:37,586 Okay, I just wanna make really sure this time. 345 00:21:37,754 --> 00:21:38,838 Uh-huh. Ahem. 346 00:21:39,006 --> 00:21:43,342 Andie MacDowell is the girl from Four Weddings and a Funeral, right? 347 00:21:44,428 --> 00:21:45,469 No. 348 00:21:47,556 --> 00:21:51,392 No, no, no, no, no, no. That's Roddy McDowall. 349 00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:55,354 Andie MacDowell is the guy from Planet of the Apes. 350 00:21:56,315 --> 00:21:58,149 - Oh! Yeah, okay. - Yeah. Okay? 351 00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:00,234 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 25665

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.