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1
00:00:35,025 --> 00:00:36,652
Thank you.
2
00:00:38,762 --> 00:00:40,765
Jesus.
3
00:00:45,896 --> 00:00:47,652
What's good, Shannon?
4
00:00:47,694 --> 00:00:50,588
Oh, Sam. Hey, hey.
5
00:00:50,630 --> 00:00:52,009
- Hey.
- Did you got my message?
6
00:00:52,051 --> 00:00:54,011
So, so sorry about this.
7
00:00:54,053 --> 00:00:57,014
What? Something else wrong with the van?
8
00:00:57,056 --> 00:00:59,749
Yeah, so, um, we're still
looking into things,
9
00:00:59,791 --> 00:01:02,286
but it seems like
someone made off pretty clean
10
00:01:02,328 --> 00:01:04,063
with a couple vehicles last night.
11
00:01:05,098 --> 00:01:06,322
It was stolen?
12
00:01:06,364 --> 00:01:07,758
Yeah. But don't worry.
13
00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:09,559
You're completely covered
by our insurance.
14
00:01:09,601 --> 00:01:11,895
And I-I know you got that
tracker LoJack thing in there,
15
00:01:11,937 --> 00:01:13,464
so... might turn up.
16
00:01:13,506 --> 00:01:16,032
No, no. That's okay.
17
00:01:16,074 --> 00:01:17,934
It's probably totally gone forever.
18
00:01:17,976 --> 00:01:20,338
C-Can you sign this, though,
for the insurance?
19
00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:22,372
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
20
00:01:22,414 --> 00:01:23,973
- Sorry, Sam.
- Yeah.
21
00:01:24,015 --> 00:01:26,142
We did fix that vibrating
in the steering wheel,
22
00:01:26,184 --> 00:01:28,044
- so, you know, if it does turn up...
- Mm.
23
00:01:28,086 --> 00:01:30,113
Not cool, Shannon.
24
00:01:30,155 --> 00:01:33,583
- Yeah, not... not cool.
- Sorry, Sam.
25
00:01:33,625 --> 00:01:35,419
Not cool. Yes!
26
00:01:35,461 --> 00:01:40,423
Sync and corrections by btsix
27
00:01:40,465 --> 00:01:42,460
I was fine, you know?
28
00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:45,295
And then he comes over
to tuck the kids in.
29
00:01:45,337 --> 00:01:47,598
And just having him back in the house...
30
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:49,333
I practically begged him to stay.
31
00:01:49,375 --> 00:01:51,469
- Mm.
- I am such a loser.
32
00:01:51,511 --> 00:01:53,503
Uh, uh, uh. Don't say that.
33
00:01:53,545 --> 00:01:55,538
Ooh.
34
00:01:55,580 --> 00:01:57,341
Um, honey?
35
00:01:57,383 --> 00:02:00,034
I am. I'm one of those people now.
36
00:02:00,076 --> 00:02:02,946
- I'm my mama.
- No, you're not.
37
00:02:02,988 --> 00:02:05,014
Is that a diaper bag?
38
00:02:05,056 --> 00:02:07,172
It's like I just keep punching myself
39
00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:10,005
in the face right in front of him.
Like, "Ain't I cute?
40
00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:11,640
Don't you want all this mess?"
41
00:02:11,682 --> 00:02:13,986
And then he comes home for 15 minutes
42
00:02:14,028 --> 00:02:15,992
at the end of the day
to tuck the kids in,
43
00:02:16,034 --> 00:02:19,205
and it's Captain Daddy Bedtime Champion.
44
00:02:19,247 --> 00:02:20,672
He can't do that.
45
00:02:20,714 --> 00:02:22,574
Oh, uh, you know what, though?
46
00:02:22,616 --> 00:02:23,833
He actually can.
47
00:02:23,875 --> 00:02:25,635
Because you don't have a mediator
48
00:02:25,677 --> 00:02:29,506
or a schedule or an attorney,
so he can do whatever he wants.
49
00:02:29,548 --> 00:02:31,641
You have no boundaries for him.
50
00:02:31,683 --> 00:02:34,402
Sorry, broken record,
but I will continue
51
00:02:34,444 --> 00:02:37,981
to be a broken record
until you get professional help.
52
00:02:38,023 --> 00:02:40,151
I'm sorry. I know that you're right.
53
00:02:40,193 --> 00:02:43,386
I know you're right. It's just
this waiting that's killing me.
54
00:02:43,428 --> 00:02:45,189
Waiting for?
55
00:02:45,231 --> 00:02:48,769
I just want things to go back to normal.
56
00:02:48,811 --> 00:02:49,823
Oh!
57
00:02:52,004 --> 00:02:53,931
Ooh!
58
00:02:53,973 --> 00:02:55,231
These are g... This isn't gonna hold.
59
00:02:55,273 --> 00:02:57,901
- No, no, no.
- I need a backup.
60
00:02:59,010 --> 00:03:01,838
That's so nasty. I'm not...
61
00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:04,382
Everybody should have diapers
in the car.
62
00:03:04,424 --> 00:03:06,268
- Girl, that's not...
- Whether you have kids or not.
63
00:03:06,310 --> 00:03:08,178
- That's so nasty. I'm not...
- It may look weird, but...
64
00:03:08,220 --> 00:03:11,481
Oh. Ooh!
65
00:03:11,523 --> 00:03:12,916
Okay.
66
00:03:12,958 --> 00:03:15,888
Ready to go. Here comes gym.
67
00:03:15,930 --> 00:03:17,787
That's some white people shit.
68
00:03:24,321 --> 00:03:25,396
Oh, buddy.
69
00:03:26,031 --> 00:03:28,231
Guess why I'm smiling right now.
70
00:03:28,643 --> 00:03:30,088
Because I'm ridiculous?
71
00:03:30,130 --> 00:03:31,434
No.
72
00:03:31,476 --> 00:03:34,704
Because I see what's
on the other side for you.
73
00:03:35,522 --> 00:03:38,208
In this case,
the journey is not the reward.
74
00:03:38,250 --> 00:03:40,577
The reward is being on the other side
75
00:03:40,619 --> 00:03:42,679
and being free of this pain
76
00:03:42,721 --> 00:03:45,382
and knowing that he did you a favor.
77
00:03:46,241 --> 00:03:49,420
You could have used less
of a blindside, but...
78
00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:51,654
garbage into gold.
79
00:03:51,696 --> 00:03:53,165
Let's go.
80
00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:55,659
Oh, hi.
81
00:03:56,184 --> 00:03:58,191
Do you want to know why she's crying?
82
00:03:58,233 --> 00:04:00,630
Is that why you're looking?
83
00:04:00,672 --> 00:04:02,933
Well, she's 49.
84
00:04:02,975 --> 00:04:05,135
Her husband just left her.
85
00:04:05,177 --> 00:04:08,071
She's got macular degeneration.
86
00:04:08,113 --> 00:04:11,035
She's got a six-year-old
and a semi-new baby.
87
00:04:11,077 --> 00:04:12,276
Oh, no.
88
00:04:12,318 --> 00:04:14,654
And, uh, she's gonna be 50.
89
00:04:14,696 --> 00:04:15,976
So...
90
00:04:17,022 --> 00:04:19,749
She's 50!
91
00:04:25,485 --> 00:04:27,752
I never did that when I was pregnant,
92
00:04:27,794 --> 00:04:29,046
and I have three.
93
00:04:29,088 --> 00:04:30,326
Hmm.
94
00:04:30,368 --> 00:04:32,629
And now I wish I had done more sit-ups.
95
00:04:32,671 --> 00:04:34,965
This is my fifth.
96
00:04:59,164 --> 00:05:01,313
I said, "I'm not doing this for you.
97
00:05:01,355 --> 00:05:03,796
I'm doing this for the man
that I'm leaving you for."
98
00:05:04,904 --> 00:05:06,396
Amen.
99
00:05:06,438 --> 00:05:08,296
I mean "A-women."
100
00:05:08,338 --> 00:05:10,739
Oh. He knows I love his fat ass.
101
00:05:10,781 --> 00:05:12,019
I just don't love mine.
102
00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:14,507
Sam? Sam!
103
00:05:14,549 --> 00:05:17,822
I love seeing you here.
It's Toussaint, President's mom.
104
00:05:17,864 --> 00:05:20,009
We worked on the bake sale
together all those years.
105
00:05:20,051 --> 00:05:21,679
And I made those super
strawberry scones, and you were
106
00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:23,314
like, "These are the best things
I've ever had."
107
00:05:23,356 --> 00:05:24,648
- Yup.
- It's so good to see you.
108
00:05:24,690 --> 00:05:27,451
- I didn't know you go here.
- Yeah. I go here.
109
00:05:27,493 --> 00:05:30,049
President told me
that Frankie skipped a grade.
110
00:05:30,091 --> 00:05:31,355
How did you pull that one off?
111
00:05:31,397 --> 00:05:33,824
I bet you had to really do
some backflips for that one.
112
00:05:33,866 --> 00:05:36,203
And boy, oh, boy, that is...
I don't want to scare you,
113
00:05:36,245 --> 00:05:38,862
but that is social suicide
to the max element degree.
114
00:05:38,904 --> 00:05:40,473
I mean, don't freak out...
It's not like she has to go
115
00:05:40,515 --> 00:05:42,432
to the hospital or anything...
But you skip someone ahead,
116
00:05:42,474 --> 00:05:44,105
- and they could...
- Who knows?
117
00:05:44,147 --> 00:05:47,253
How do I get my kids to give
a two clown shit about school?
118
00:05:47,295 --> 00:05:49,340
What's your magic?
I mean, all my kids want to do
119
00:05:49,382 --> 00:05:50,908
is eat toast and masturbate.
120
00:05:50,950 --> 00:05:52,369
I can't believe what you do.
121
00:05:52,411 --> 00:05:54,244
You're like an adolescent
freak whisperer.
122
00:05:54,286 --> 00:05:56,690
You come to my house,
I'll make you spaghetti.
123
00:05:56,732 --> 00:05:59,216
- I'll do anything you want.
- I fucking love you, Sam Fox.
124
00:05:59,258 --> 00:06:01,785
And you're popular.
But you've got roots.
125
00:06:01,827 --> 00:06:04,220
Jessica. We worked together
on The Prowler.
126
00:06:04,262 --> 00:06:07,557
Yes. I'm sorry. Baby Jess.
127
00:06:07,599 --> 00:06:09,627
- You were the...
- Demon hell child.
128
00:06:09,669 --> 00:06:12,657
How many times did they make you
do that vomit sunflower?
129
00:06:12,699 --> 00:06:13,797
No, no, don't.
130
00:06:13,839 --> 00:06:16,100
Because I still can't go
anywhere near clam chowder.
131
00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:17,439
- Right?
- How are you?
132
00:06:17,481 --> 00:06:19,163
I heard you just signed with Mal.
133
00:06:19,205 --> 00:06:20,537
Oh.
134
00:06:20,579 --> 00:06:22,156
And the thing about you is,
135
00:06:22,198 --> 00:06:24,540
you are so brave in your work.
136
00:06:24,582 --> 00:06:27,077
And I love that you have real thighs
137
00:06:27,119 --> 00:06:28,639
and you aren't afraid to show them.
138
00:06:29,231 --> 00:06:32,348
My wife is gonna die. She loves you.
139
00:06:32,390 --> 00:06:34,341
- Huh.
- This is really gonna work.
140
00:06:34,383 --> 00:06:35,834
He is the best.
141
00:06:35,876 --> 00:06:37,882
He just got me a three-show deal
at Yougooglelu.
142
00:06:37,924 --> 00:06:38,931
Oh, shit.
143
00:06:38,973 --> 00:06:40,924
I was eavesdropping
before on the machines.
144
00:06:40,966 --> 00:06:43,494
You are effing hilarious.
145
00:06:43,536 --> 00:06:46,596
Oh, well, her pain is pretty funny.
146
00:06:47,350 --> 00:06:49,064
Men are shit.
147
00:06:49,106 --> 00:06:50,556
I want to do something with you.
148
00:06:50,598 --> 00:06:52,003
I've got some ideas. I'm gonna call Mal.
149
00:06:52,045 --> 00:06:53,416
Are you in town for a while?
150
00:06:53,458 --> 00:06:55,381
Um, sure. Yeah.
151
00:06:59,818 --> 00:07:03,213
So, here is the best part.
152
00:07:03,645 --> 00:07:05,348
We get to go home now.
153
00:07:05,390 --> 00:07:08,052
Longest time ever before more gym.
154
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:09,353
I'm proud of you.
155
00:07:09,395 --> 00:07:10,788
It does feel pretty good.
156
00:07:10,830 --> 00:07:12,155
Yes!
157
00:07:12,197 --> 00:07:15,115
The endorphins live!
158
00:07:16,326 --> 00:07:17,702
Now we drink.
159
00:07:21,435 --> 00:07:22,863
Just me.
160
00:07:22,906 --> 00:07:24,131
- Hi.
- Hi.
161
00:07:24,173 --> 00:07:25,667
U-Untether me, please.
162
00:07:25,709 --> 00:07:26,967
Why? Are you showering?
163
00:07:27,009 --> 00:07:29,604
I don't track
your grooming habits, do I?
164
00:07:29,646 --> 00:07:31,273
Well, you're not supposed to take it off
165
00:07:31,315 --> 00:07:33,041
- unless you're showering.
- Ugh.
166
00:07:34,042 --> 00:07:36,410
Please.
167
00:07:39,889 --> 00:07:41,782
- Okay. Mm-hmm, well...
- And the straps.
168
00:07:42,526 --> 00:07:45,596
Hey, Mom, I need you
to sign this for me for school.
169
00:07:46,283 --> 00:07:47,354
Nice tits, Gran.
170
00:07:47,396 --> 00:07:48,556
Thank you, dear.
171
00:07:48,598 --> 00:07:50,424
Is that a new stained glass?
172
00:07:50,466 --> 00:07:52,126
It's pretty.
173
00:07:52,168 --> 00:07:53,994
No, it's been there for 20 years, Phil.
174
00:07:54,036 --> 00:07:55,249
- Bye.
- Bye.
175
00:07:56,973 --> 00:07:58,066
Okay.
176
00:07:58,859 --> 00:08:00,602
Uh...
177
00:08:00,644 --> 00:08:03,604
- Okay, what is it... for?
- Thank you.
178
00:08:03,646 --> 00:08:05,240
What did I sign?
179
00:08:17,526 --> 00:08:19,653
- Hello.
- Not your manager,
180
00:08:19,695 --> 00:08:23,225
but I have very crazy
professional news for you.
181
00:08:23,267 --> 00:08:25,846
Tasco's rebooting Ching of the Mill.
182
00:08:25,888 --> 00:08:28,128
- What?!
- Donnie wants to meet with you
183
00:08:28,170 --> 00:08:29,576
out in Simi Valley tomorrow.
184
00:08:29,618 --> 00:08:31,409
I will send you all the details.
185
00:08:31,451 --> 00:08:32,967
Oh, my God.
186
00:08:33,009 --> 00:08:35,303
It's gonna be huge.
Everyone wants in on this show.
187
00:08:35,345 --> 00:08:37,687
So I personally suggest you do it.
188
00:08:37,729 --> 00:08:40,942
This is so good!
Maybe I can fix my roof.
189
00:08:40,984 --> 00:08:43,111
I'm almost poor.
Did I tell you I'm poor now?
190
00:08:43,153 --> 00:08:44,940
Sorry to hear that.
Regardless, I'm taking 15%
191
00:08:44,982 --> 00:08:46,046
if this thing is a go.
192
00:08:46,088 --> 00:08:47,482
Also, I'm not your manager.
193
00:08:47,524 --> 00:08:49,416
Also, I will see you Saturday
with the kids.
194
00:08:49,458 --> 00:08:51,685
- Love you! See you Saturday.
- Love you.
195
00:08:51,727 --> 00:08:53,020
Oh!
196
00:08:53,062 --> 00:08:55,991
Yes! Yes!
197
00:09:27,998 --> 00:09:31,025
We must cover the ribs
198
00:09:31,067 --> 00:09:33,727
so as not to burn them.
199
00:09:54,591 --> 00:09:56,918
Hi. Hi.
200
00:09:56,960 --> 00:09:59,320
Do you have a lady dealer available?
201
00:09:59,362 --> 00:10:00,956
I'm sorry, all of our sales associates
202
00:10:00,998 --> 00:10:02,424
are busy at the moment.
203
00:10:02,466 --> 00:10:04,259
Did you make an appointment online?
204
00:10:04,794 --> 00:10:08,832
Oh, I didn't know that...
205
00:10:08,874 --> 00:10:11,866
Uh, I thought this was just,
like, a car dealership
206
00:10:11,908 --> 00:10:14,102
and you could walk in and look at a car.
207
00:10:14,144 --> 00:10:15,437
We don't take walk-ins.
208
00:10:17,147 --> 00:10:19,640
- Hey. Sorry I'm late.
- I told you.
209
00:10:19,682 --> 00:10:21,175
Nobody will help me.
210
00:10:21,217 --> 00:10:23,410
Are you looking
for a new car experience today?
211
00:10:23,452 --> 00:10:25,746
I think it's my wife here
212
00:10:25,788 --> 00:10:27,348
that needs your help. Come here, Pooh.
213
00:10:27,390 --> 00:10:28,449
Oh.
214
00:10:28,491 --> 00:10:29,650
She's such a different person
215
00:10:29,692 --> 00:10:31,285
since she went
through the change last year.
216
00:10:32,278 --> 00:10:33,288
Do you need your fan?
217
00:10:34,931 --> 00:10:36,623
Do you need some water?
218
00:10:39,668 --> 00:10:41,062
So, what's the story?
219
00:10:41,104 --> 00:10:42,463
You want to look at the Pacifica?
220
00:10:42,505 --> 00:10:44,399
I'm not getting another van.
221
00:10:44,441 --> 00:10:46,067
But you have a lot of people.
222
00:10:46,109 --> 00:10:47,901
I really don't. Max drives herself,
223
00:10:47,943 --> 00:10:49,471
and I'm usually alone now.
224
00:10:50,105 --> 00:10:51,482
You're never alone.
225
00:10:52,849 --> 00:10:54,708
So that's it? I'm just neutered.
226
00:10:54,750 --> 00:10:57,478
I used to drive an
eight-cylinder '88 Fox-body
227
00:10:57,520 --> 00:11:00,102
which was absorbed into the dealership
228
00:11:00,144 --> 00:11:02,650
when I traded it in for the mommy van.
229
00:11:02,692 --> 00:11:03,832
You're a mommy.
230
00:11:04,528 --> 00:11:06,221
I want something cool.
231
00:11:06,263 --> 00:11:07,942
Why do you get to drive this truck?
232
00:11:08,697 --> 00:11:11,001
- You have kids.
- You have kids.
233
00:11:12,034 --> 00:11:13,294
It's different for guys.
234
00:11:13,336 --> 00:11:14,554
I know.
235
00:11:21,445 --> 00:11:23,004
Jesus.
236
00:11:23,046 --> 00:11:25,774
Look how fucking low I am.
237
00:11:25,816 --> 00:11:27,809
I need, like, ten pillows.
238
00:11:27,851 --> 00:11:29,810
I feel like I'm driving my dad's car.
239
00:11:29,852 --> 00:11:32,514
Do you have anything with
a stick? Like, anything fun?
240
00:11:32,556 --> 00:11:34,281
Pretty much everything's
automatic these days.
241
00:11:34,323 --> 00:11:35,551
- Mm...
- Can you even drive a stick?
242
00:11:36,166 --> 00:11:38,653
What are you talking about?
Zombie escape plan.
243
00:11:38,695 --> 00:11:42,022
I tell all the girls that they
have to learn to drive a stick.
244
00:11:42,064 --> 00:11:44,291
Because in the apocalypse,
there's gonna be
245
00:11:44,333 --> 00:11:48,262
one lone prospector
with a gas pump, a slash of rope
246
00:11:48,304 --> 00:11:52,199
and a landline, and he's gonna
fix the end of the world.
247
00:11:52,241 --> 00:11:54,269
- She actually tells them this.
- Sounds like a good plan.
248
00:11:54,311 --> 00:11:57,338
Just maybe I should do
249
00:11:57,380 --> 00:12:00,574
the responsibly thing
and get an electric job.
250
00:12:00,616 --> 00:12:02,641
Oh, we got the i3 over here.
251
00:12:03,220 --> 00:12:04,712
Whoa.
252
00:12:04,754 --> 00:12:06,647
That car is ugly as shit.
253
00:12:06,689 --> 00:12:08,882
Some people really like it.
It's good for the environment.
254
00:12:08,924 --> 00:12:11,086
You should take it for
a couple days and try it out.
255
00:12:11,128 --> 00:12:12,520
I don't have a charger thingy.
256
00:12:12,562 --> 00:12:14,389
Just go to the mall or any parking lot.
257
00:12:14,431 --> 00:12:15,689
They've got them everywhere.
258
00:12:15,731 --> 00:12:18,626
"Almost Nude Maids"? What the hell?
259
00:12:18,668 --> 00:12:20,663
That's how I met my wife.
260
00:12:22,038 --> 00:12:24,933
I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
261
00:12:24,975 --> 00:12:26,501
Hey, hey.
262
00:12:26,543 --> 00:12:28,368
Oh. Hey, Brad.
263
00:12:28,410 --> 00:12:30,270
Hey, Sam. What happened to the minivan?
264
00:12:30,312 --> 00:12:32,249
Oh, this is a loaner.
265
00:12:36,318 --> 00:12:39,546
So, you know, we really like your mom.
266
00:12:39,588 --> 00:12:41,849
- Oh, God.
- But she's been swimming
267
00:12:41,891 --> 00:12:43,251
in our pool.
268
00:12:43,293 --> 00:12:45,019
A-Actually, that's not even the issue.
269
00:12:45,061 --> 00:12:47,322
I mean, we don't mind
if she wants to swim, but...
270
00:12:47,364 --> 00:12:48,773
if she could just...
271
00:12:50,133 --> 00:12:51,825
cover herself up?
272
00:12:51,867 --> 00:12:54,194
It's just, we got young boys,
and, well, y-your mother
273
00:12:54,236 --> 00:12:59,099
doesn't exactly have
the body of a woman her age.
274
00:12:59,141 --> 00:13:01,769
God. Brad, I'm so sorry.
275
00:13:01,811 --> 00:13:05,707
We-we really don't want to make
this into a thing, you know?
276
00:13:05,749 --> 00:13:08,242
Actually, you know,
we're thrilled that she dropped
277
00:13:08,284 --> 00:13:09,910
the lawsuit against our dogs.
278
00:13:09,952 --> 00:13:13,014
If she could wear
a swimsuit or something,
279
00:13:13,056 --> 00:13:15,415
- we'd be really grateful.
- Yeah.
280
00:13:15,457 --> 00:13:16,918
- No. I know.
- Say anything, just...
281
00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:19,120
- Can you...? Bye.
- Oh. Oh.
282
00:13:19,162 --> 00:13:20,454
Sorry.
283
00:13:20,496 --> 00:13:22,524
- Say hi to your wife.
- Okay.
284
00:13:22,566 --> 00:13:25,352
- Laura? Laura, I think.
- Lisa. It's Lisa.
285
00:13:27,669 --> 00:13:30,564
♪ Paradise, feeling's nice ♪
286
00:13:30,606 --> 00:13:32,666
♪ When you turn out the lights ♪
287
00:13:34,041 --> 00:13:35,435
♪ La, la, la... ♪
288
00:13:35,477 --> 00:13:37,403
Okay, what's the point?
289
00:13:37,445 --> 00:13:40,239
So good to see you.
My God, how cool is this?
290
00:13:40,281 --> 00:13:42,309
- Huh?
- Oh, my God, it's amazing.
291
00:13:42,351 --> 00:13:44,744
- How are the girls doing?
- They're great, they're great.
292
00:13:44,786 --> 00:13:47,013
I mean, they're all older
than me now, but...
293
00:13:47,055 --> 00:13:50,316
Well, yeah. I mean, uh, Milo
just graduated from Cal Poly.
294
00:13:50,358 --> 00:13:52,219
- Jack's studying to be a vet.
- Wow.
295
00:13:52,261 --> 00:13:54,153
- I know.
- I hear it's harder to be a vet
296
00:13:54,195 --> 00:13:55,706
- than to be a human-people doctor.
- That's true.
297
00:13:55,748 --> 00:13:58,208
That's ac... Yeah, 'cause you
got to master all the, uh,
298
00:13:58,250 --> 00:14:01,278
all the, uh, you know,
additional, uh, anatomies...
299
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:04,080
- ...and stuff like that.
- Oh, my God. This is so great.
300
00:14:04,122 --> 00:14:05,128
- I can't believe...
- Yeah, so listen, uh,
301
00:14:05,170 --> 00:14:06,183
thanks for doing this.
302
00:14:06,225 --> 00:14:07,818
- I know it's just like...
- When do we start?
303
00:14:07,860 --> 00:14:09,450
...it's crazy awkward, and...
304
00:14:14,338 --> 00:14:16,326
Oh, God. Your manager didn't
305
00:14:16,368 --> 00:14:18,696
explain the, uh, the situation.
306
00:14:18,738 --> 00:14:20,697
- Oh, shit.
- Well, what?
307
00:14:20,739 --> 00:14:22,533
I'm kind of in between
managers right now.
308
00:14:22,575 --> 00:14:24,201
What-what situation?
309
00:14:24,243 --> 00:14:26,736
It's just a formality, okay?
310
00:14:26,778 --> 00:14:30,740
But, uh, we need you
to read for the part.
311
00:14:30,782 --> 00:14:32,009
Oh, that's fine.
312
00:14:32,051 --> 00:14:34,378
- Which part?
- Uh, Rooster.
313
00:14:34,420 --> 00:14:36,714
Look, w-we don't know,
we don't know if we're gonna,
314
00:14:36,756 --> 00:14:38,416
uh, age him up, age him down
315
00:14:38,458 --> 00:14:40,350
or do something completely,
you know, different.
316
00:14:40,392 --> 00:14:41,852
- Oh...
- Listen, listen, listen.
317
00:14:41,894 --> 00:14:43,553
- I know what you can do. Okay?
- Mm-hmm.
318
00:14:43,595 --> 00:14:45,755
I mean, you know that. It's not me.
319
00:14:45,797 --> 00:14:49,494
It's just these new...
exquisite corpse corps.
320
00:14:50,285 --> 00:14:53,530
Yeah. They want me to read for my part?
321
00:14:53,572 --> 00:14:55,633
The part that I did for ten years.
322
00:14:55,675 --> 00:14:58,568
The part I won
a Genie Golden Halo Award for?
323
00:14:58,610 --> 00:15:00,138
And well-deserved.
324
00:15:00,180 --> 00:15:02,616
I mean, I mean, well-deserved, right?
325
00:15:05,531 --> 00:15:07,010
There she is.
326
00:15:07,052 --> 00:15:08,613
- Hey.
- Hey.
327
00:15:09,039 --> 00:15:10,981
- What's up?
- How are you?
328
00:15:11,023 --> 00:15:13,783
- How are the girls?
- Good. They're great. They're great.
329
00:15:13,825 --> 00:15:16,453
- How are your girls?
- Uh, the girls are great. Yeah.
330
00:15:16,495 --> 00:15:18,923
And then I got-got
other kids, too. They're good.
331
00:15:18,965 --> 00:15:21,792
- Oh. You do?
- Um, yeah. Long story short,
332
00:15:21,834 --> 00:15:26,429
I-I had a vasectomy and...
didn't work, and so basically,
333
00:15:26,471 --> 00:15:29,499
I've got six kids... They're all 13.
334
00:15:29,541 --> 00:15:32,135
- Ah.
- Not sextuplets.
335
00:15:32,177 --> 00:15:34,839
- 13, yeah. Um...
- Wow. Yeah.
336
00:15:34,881 --> 00:15:37,654
And that's why we're doing the reboot.
337
00:15:37,696 --> 00:15:41,034
Yeah, you got to get
that orthodontia money.
338
00:15:41,076 --> 00:15:43,463
- Yeah. But, uh, hey.
- Okay, well...
339
00:15:43,505 --> 00:15:44,815
Kill the people, Sammy.
340
00:15:44,857 --> 00:15:46,116
- Cool. Yeah.
- You're gonna crush it.
341
00:15:46,158 --> 00:15:48,619
- Amazing. Okay.
- Come on. All righty.
342
00:15:48,661 --> 00:15:49,671
Good luck. Or...
343
00:15:49,713 --> 00:15:50,954
- You don't need it. We'll see you.
- Thanks.
344
00:15:50,996 --> 00:15:52,490
- Thanks, boss.
- All righty. - Close... Mike.
345
00:15:52,532 --> 00:15:54,258
- Close the fucking door, dude. Come on.
- Oh, yeah.
346
00:15:54,300 --> 00:15:56,268
This is just a formality, all right?
Everyone is doing it.
347
00:15:56,310 --> 00:15:57,588
- Okay. Yeah.
- Okay? You know?
348
00:15:57,630 --> 00:15:59,663
I mean, Maddie, Brittany,
Carlos, Henry...
349
00:15:59,705 --> 00:16:01,815
- Oh, they all...?
- Yeah.
350
00:16:01,857 --> 00:16:04,168
- That makes me feel better.
- Yeah.
351
00:16:04,210 --> 00:16:06,070
And you're, you know,
you're Rooster, for God's sakes.
352
00:16:06,112 --> 00:16:08,673
- Just give me a little, would you?
- Okay.
353
00:16:08,715 --> 00:16:10,474
Poop-poop, pop, purple,
354
00:16:10,516 --> 00:16:12,634
- people, pretzel.
- Good.
355
00:16:13,023 --> 00:16:14,325
- Pencil.
- Good. All right, listen,
356
00:16:14,367 --> 00:16:15,741
I'm gonna turn my back on you.
357
00:16:15,783 --> 00:16:18,259
All right? So, I know you know
that doesn't mean I'm being rude
358
00:16:18,301 --> 00:16:20,037
- or anything, okay? Right?
- Oh, no.
359
00:16:20,079 --> 00:16:21,851
You did this at
my original audition, and...
360
00:16:21,893 --> 00:16:23,988
- All right. All right.
- Ain't no... Okay.
361
00:16:24,030 --> 00:16:25,497
Okay, so,
362
00:16:25,539 --> 00:16:27,999
- whenever you're ready. Action.
- Okay.
363
00:16:28,041 --> 00:16:30,327
A bee stung my head.
364
00:16:30,369 --> 00:16:32,395
Okay, good. Uh, just try,
365
00:16:32,437 --> 00:16:34,518
just try pitching it up
a little bit, Sam.
366
00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:36,167
Okay, sure.
367
00:16:36,209 --> 00:16:39,641
A bee stung my head.
368
00:16:40,517 --> 00:16:43,941
Teacher said my toaster
was pandiculated.
369
00:16:43,983 --> 00:16:45,909
Santa can't bring me an uninfect...
370
00:16:45,951 --> 00:16:47,577
All right, fine. Good, stop.
371
00:16:47,619 --> 00:16:49,346
Jesus, God.
372
00:16:49,388 --> 00:16:51,349
God, you're brilliant. You are.
373
00:16:51,391 --> 00:16:54,158
I mean, you were always
so good off the page. Right?
374
00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:56,379
- Yeah.
- I'm serious. Huh?
375
00:16:56,421 --> 00:16:58,188
- Thanks.
- You gonna be in town for a while?
376
00:16:58,230 --> 00:16:59,621
Yeah, sure, I'm in town.
377
00:16:59,663 --> 00:17:00,991
- Where am I going?
- Yeah, right?
378
00:17:01,033 --> 00:17:03,193
- Yeah.
- Hey, hey.
379
00:17:03,235 --> 00:17:05,528
Hey. Wait.
380
00:17:05,570 --> 00:17:06,931
It's Curly. You remember,
you remember Curly.
381
00:17:06,973 --> 00:17:09,165
- Yes! Yes.
- Yeah.
382
00:17:09,207 --> 00:17:11,301
You're the P.A.
who would stock the green room
383
00:17:11,343 --> 00:17:12,903
with all our favorite snacks.
384
00:17:12,945 --> 00:17:15,785
Slim Jims and wasabi peanuts.
385
00:17:15,827 --> 00:17:17,920
- Still my favorite.
- Amazing.
386
00:17:17,962 --> 00:17:20,443
I want to get some for the road,
if you don't mind.
387
00:17:20,485 --> 00:17:23,681
Oh, uh, I'm-I'm actually
not a P.A. anymore.
388
00:17:23,723 --> 00:17:26,279
I'm one of the executive producers now.
389
00:17:26,321 --> 00:17:30,106
- I-I'm happy to-to get you some Slim...
- Cool. Cool, cool, cool.
390
00:17:30,148 --> 00:17:32,208
- You said Slim Jims?
- No, no, no, no, no. You know what?
391
00:17:32,250 --> 00:17:34,477
There's a 7-Eleven
down the street anyway.
392
00:17:34,519 --> 00:17:35,912
- Congratula... That's great.
- Yeah... Thank you.
393
00:17:35,954 --> 00:17:37,379
- Okay. Mm-hmm.
- Thank you.
394
00:17:37,421 --> 00:17:39,315
- I love you. I adore you.
- Love, yes.
395
00:17:39,357 --> 00:17:40,549
So, I'm gonna see you soon, eh?
396
00:17:40,591 --> 00:17:42,868
Gee, I hope I get my own part.
397
00:17:42,910 --> 00:17:44,168
Peace.
398
00:17:44,210 --> 00:17:46,310
How'd it go?
399
00:17:46,697 --> 00:17:48,590
Awkward as fuck.
400
00:17:52,025 --> 00:17:55,942
♪ I'll be a sky so full of empty now ♪
401
00:17:55,984 --> 00:17:59,969
♪ That little falcons dive into, lover ♪
402
00:18:00,011 --> 00:18:04,472
♪ So when I'm restless
they can lead somehow ♪
403
00:18:04,514 --> 00:18:08,911
♪ What in the world
I'm gonna do out here ♪
404
00:18:08,953 --> 00:18:12,615
♪ I feel that I'm a little lost
most of the time ♪
405
00:18:12,657 --> 00:18:15,593
♪ But I don't really mind. ♪
406
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,406
Serious?
407
00:18:56,033 --> 00:18:58,369
Yes.
408
00:19:00,538 --> 00:19:01,696
Oh.
409
00:19:01,738 --> 00:19:04,308
Hi.
410
00:19:05,776 --> 00:19:07,302
Need something?
411
00:19:07,344 --> 00:19:08,570
Uh, yeah.
412
00:19:08,612 --> 00:19:10,573
Can you help me?
413
00:19:10,615 --> 00:19:11,944
Depends how you mean it.
414
00:19:12,582 --> 00:19:14,363
That your golf cart?
415
00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:17,879
Uh, ha! Yeah.
416
00:19:17,921 --> 00:19:19,714
I need a tow truck.
417
00:19:19,756 --> 00:19:21,483
Or an extension cord.
418
00:19:21,525 --> 00:19:24,052
And my cell phone's being stupid, so...
419
00:19:24,094 --> 00:19:25,820
There's not very good reception
around here
420
00:19:25,862 --> 00:19:27,323
at the end of the world.
421
00:19:27,365 --> 00:19:29,968
Mm.
422
00:19:35,369 --> 00:19:37,975
Feel free to use my landline.
423
00:19:40,267 --> 00:19:41,336
Oh.
424
00:19:48,628 --> 00:19:49,790
Bango.
425
00:19:56,579 --> 00:19:58,616
What do you got under there?
426
00:20:00,165 --> 00:20:01,908
You want me to take it out?
427
00:20:01,950 --> 00:20:03,845
Oh, no. No, that's cool.
428
00:20:03,887 --> 00:20:08,892
No. Any excuse to get her out.
429
00:20:13,171 --> 00:20:14,856
I love looking at this car.
430
00:20:16,299 --> 00:20:18,760
- Yeah.
- Whoa.
431
00:20:19,101 --> 00:20:20,703
Yes!
432
00:20:22,857 --> 00:20:24,150
Chromey beauty.
433
00:20:24,664 --> 00:20:26,901
Run your fingers along these edges.
434
00:20:26,943 --> 00:20:28,769
Like here and underneath.
435
00:20:29,470 --> 00:20:30,738
You feel that?
436
00:20:30,780 --> 00:20:33,607
Yeah, there's no rough spots
on this car anywhere.
437
00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:37,245
When I was a kid,
my neighbor had a car like this,
438
00:20:37,287 --> 00:20:39,881
and it had this weird back thing.
439
00:20:39,923 --> 00:20:41,248
What is this called?
440
00:20:41,290 --> 00:20:44,160
- They call it a truck bed.
- Mm.
441
00:20:45,728 --> 00:20:47,622
- Get in.
- Oh, no.
442
00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:49,289
I couldn't. I don't want to hurt it.
443
00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:52,325
A lot of people will tell you
a car like this,
444
00:20:52,367 --> 00:20:55,095
you should just bring it
to auto shows on Sunday.
445
00:20:55,137 --> 00:20:57,040
- It's shameful.
- Mm.
446
00:20:58,774 --> 00:21:01,043
This is a driving car.
447
00:21:03,312 --> 00:21:05,640
I feel like a getaway driver.
448
00:21:05,682 --> 00:21:07,575
Not with your hands off the wheel.
449
00:21:07,617 --> 00:21:10,076
Ooh.
450
00:21:10,118 --> 00:21:11,178
And it's wood.
451
00:21:11,220 --> 00:21:13,223
How bad is it for the environment?
452
00:21:14,323 --> 00:21:15,891
Really bad.
453
00:21:16,492 --> 00:21:17,751
Mmm.
454
00:21:17,793 --> 00:21:20,555
Har-loo!
455
00:21:20,597 --> 00:21:24,258
Hello. I have something
very life-changing
456
00:21:24,300 --> 00:21:25,860
to share with you.
457
00:21:25,902 --> 00:21:28,563
Or change of life-ing. Hmm.
458
00:21:28,605 --> 00:21:29,796
- Mom. Mom, Mom.
- What?
459
00:21:29,838 --> 00:21:31,364
Can you make me
a grilled cheese sandwich
460
00:21:31,406 --> 00:21:32,633
with the Cheshire cheese you bought?
461
00:21:32,675 --> 00:21:34,302
- What?
- Can you make me, uh, the...
462
00:21:34,344 --> 00:21:35,803
With the Cheshire cheese that...
463
00:21:35,845 --> 00:21:37,371
Excuse me.
464
00:21:37,413 --> 00:21:39,774
- Hello.
- Hi.
465
00:21:39,816 --> 00:21:43,462
Hi. How are you?
466
00:21:43,504 --> 00:21:46,212
Could you please... move...
467
00:21:46,254 --> 00:21:48,248
to the side?
468
00:21:52,328 --> 00:21:55,065
Hmm. Mm-hmm.
469
00:21:56,232 --> 00:21:57,825
Mm-hmm.
470
00:21:57,867 --> 00:21:59,226
What?! No!
471
00:21:59,268 --> 00:22:00,561
What is that?!
472
00:22:00,603 --> 00:22:02,963
Oh, you got to get out.
473
00:22:03,005 --> 00:22:04,498
Can you please get out? Get out.
474
00:22:04,540 --> 00:22:06,167
Please, go to your own homes.
475
00:22:06,209 --> 00:22:08,035
Or to a parking lot. I don't care.
476
00:22:08,077 --> 00:22:10,671
But just... don't be
in my house right now.
477
00:22:10,713 --> 00:22:11,905
Mom.
478
00:22:11,947 --> 00:22:13,574
- Mom, Mom, look at me. Mom.
- Ooh!
479
00:22:13,616 --> 00:22:15,543
Look at me. Look at me. Look at me.
480
00:22:15,585 --> 00:22:16,943
- Ugh.
- It's-it's a chinchilla.
481
00:22:16,985 --> 00:22:18,578
It's like a giant furry mouse.
482
00:22:18,620 --> 00:22:20,381
Ooh!
483
00:22:20,423 --> 00:22:23,750
Oh, so, how did this get here?
484
00:22:23,792 --> 00:22:26,252
Did somebody close a zoo?
Who paid for this?
485
00:22:26,294 --> 00:22:27,854
Did somebody pay for this?
486
00:22:27,896 --> 00:22:29,390
We didn't do it on purpose.
487
00:22:29,432 --> 00:22:32,526
We went to the store
to get boneys for the dogs.
488
00:22:32,568 --> 00:22:33,893
And Duke fell in love with it.
489
00:22:33,935 --> 00:22:36,497
She hasn't had a pet like this
since Mandy Patinkin died.
490
00:22:37,041 --> 00:22:39,700
Mm-hmm. Okay, so I'm just
curious, though.
491
00:22:39,742 --> 00:22:42,135
So you guys went to a store.
492
00:22:42,177 --> 00:22:46,606
So that means that you
paid money for this.
493
00:22:46,648 --> 00:22:49,442
So I'm just wondering
how you got the money.
494
00:22:50,252 --> 00:22:51,528
I paid for it.
495
00:22:53,289 --> 00:22:55,850
- Oh.
- On your credit card.
496
00:22:55,892 --> 00:22:57,652
Oh, that's awesome.
497
00:22:57,694 --> 00:23:01,921
Max, pick the box up with that thing,
498
00:23:01,963 --> 00:23:03,923
and bring it outside.
499
00:23:03,965 --> 00:23:05,726
- Now. Now.
- Mom, Mom, its name is Priscilla.
500
00:23:05,768 --> 00:23:06,927
Priscilla the Chinchilla.
501
00:23:06,969 --> 00:23:09,326
Pick up Priscilla,
502
00:23:09,368 --> 00:23:11,265
and bring her outside
503
00:23:11,307 --> 00:23:14,567
to my new car,
which I was gonna celebrate,
504
00:23:14,609 --> 00:23:16,780
but you thunder-stealing chinchilla...
505
00:23:16,822 --> 00:23:18,471
- Wait, when did you get a new car, Mom?
- New car?
506
00:23:18,513 --> 00:23:19,739
Did you say new car?
507
00:23:19,781 --> 00:23:21,075
Mom, you promised me the minivan.
508
00:23:21,117 --> 00:23:22,276
You're full of shit, Mom.
509
00:23:22,714 --> 00:23:24,453
No, I am not.
510
00:23:25,813 --> 00:23:28,061
Did this thing even pass smog check?
511
00:23:28,103 --> 00:23:30,617
I don't know. I highly doubt it would.
512
00:23:30,659 --> 00:23:32,916
Mom, this car doesn't fit all of us.
513
00:23:32,958 --> 00:23:35,933
I know. Max, get in.
514
00:23:35,975 --> 00:23:37,416
No fair!
515
00:23:37,458 --> 00:23:39,626
Too bad, sucka. That's what you get
516
00:23:39,668 --> 00:23:41,961
for buying a chinchilla behind my back.
517
00:23:42,003 --> 00:23:43,163
Go inside.
518
00:23:47,609 --> 00:23:49,045
Yeah, baby!
519
00:23:52,389 --> 00:23:55,900
Unfortunately, there's no return
on pets, only store credit.
520
00:23:55,942 --> 00:23:59,871
I'm not trying to spend $300
on dog food and bones.
521
00:23:59,913 --> 00:24:02,937
We have a very fine selection of
pets that you can choose from.
522
00:24:02,979 --> 00:24:06,177
I don't want another pet.
I want my money back.
523
00:24:06,219 --> 00:24:08,211
You're the one who sold this dog mouse
524
00:24:08,253 --> 00:24:11,015
to a minor without parental consent.
525
00:24:11,057 --> 00:24:12,793
No, I didn't. I sold it to her.
526
00:24:14,126 --> 00:24:15,419
Anyway,
527
00:24:15,461 --> 00:24:16,920
he's been returned too many times.
528
00:24:16,962 --> 00:24:18,555
They'll probably put him down.
529
00:24:18,597 --> 00:24:20,600
- Oh, shit.
- Oh...
530
00:24:21,768 --> 00:24:23,527
- Huh, fella?
- Jesus.
531
00:24:26,439 --> 00:24:28,609
I'll be right back.
532
00:24:30,343 --> 00:24:32,603
- Hello.
I just would like
533
00:24:32,645 --> 00:24:35,139
to start this phone call by
saying I'm not your manager.
534
00:24:35,181 --> 00:24:37,440
- Stop saying that.
- Well, it's true.
535
00:24:37,482 --> 00:24:41,711
And, okay, so they're going
with all the original cast...
536
00:24:41,753 --> 00:24:43,480
That's great!
537
00:24:43,522 --> 00:24:45,864
...except for Rooster.
538
00:24:45,906 --> 00:24:46,984
What?
539
00:24:47,026 --> 00:24:49,786
They're getting Lazlo Barber.
540
00:24:49,828 --> 00:24:51,788
Lazlo Barber is dead.
541
00:24:51,830 --> 00:24:52,957
I know.
542
00:24:52,999 --> 00:24:55,226
So, what are you talking about?
543
00:24:55,268 --> 00:24:58,662
Th-They're doing something,
a new technology
544
00:24:58,704 --> 00:25:01,199
called Vocology Sernagraphio.
545
00:25:01,241 --> 00:25:03,234
They piece together his voice.
546
00:25:03,276 --> 00:25:05,402
I mean they have, like,
over 10,000 hours
547
00:25:05,444 --> 00:25:06,815
of recordings of him.
548
00:25:06,857 --> 00:25:10,874
Okay, so you're telling me
that an actually dead person
549
00:25:10,916 --> 00:25:15,813
is getting a part over me,
which is my actual part?
550
00:25:15,855 --> 00:25:18,583
Ugh, I hate being the bearer
of bad news. Jesus.
551
00:25:18,625 --> 00:25:20,722
It's nothing personal, Sam.
552
00:25:20,764 --> 00:25:23,420
They just wanted to go
in a different direction.
553
00:25:25,584 --> 00:25:27,453
It just wasn't the right fit.
554
00:25:27,914 --> 00:25:31,195
It was the right fit... for a decade.
555
00:25:31,603 --> 00:25:33,864
The guys said they love you
and they will keep you in mind
556
00:25:33,906 --> 00:25:35,498
for incidental characters.
557
00:25:39,779 --> 00:25:41,103
Oh, well.
558
00:25:42,938 --> 00:25:44,941
Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke.
559
00:25:44,983 --> 00:25:46,125
Exactly.
560
00:25:57,997 --> 00:26:00,467
Oof.
561
00:26:06,571 --> 00:26:10,101
Mom. Mom.
562
00:26:10,143 --> 00:26:11,334
She's nice.
563
00:26:11,376 --> 00:26:12,636
Whoa.
564
00:26:12,678 --> 00:26:14,705
- It's a girl?
- Yeah, it's a girl.
565
00:26:14,747 --> 00:26:17,217
- Look.
- Huh.
566
00:26:22,488 --> 00:26:24,681
Okay.
567
00:26:30,395 --> 00:26:31,632
Mom?
568
00:26:33,598 --> 00:26:35,226
What the fuck?
569
00:26:35,268 --> 00:26:40,240
Welcome to my midlife crisis!
570
00:26:44,109 --> 00:26:45,568
Can I drive your new whip?
571
00:26:45,610 --> 00:26:47,837
Hmm.
572
00:26:49,414 --> 00:26:50,674
Okay.
573
00:26:51,407 --> 00:26:54,218
I have to tend to the livestock anyway.
574
00:26:55,302 --> 00:26:56,789
Let's go home, baby.
575
00:26:57,956 --> 00:26:59,583
Let's go, snakey.
576
00:26:59,625 --> 00:27:02,253
Oh, cool, it's raining again.
577
00:27:02,295 --> 00:27:04,064
It's so cool.
578
00:27:07,567 --> 00:27:08,926
Be careful.
579
00:27:08,968 --> 00:27:10,695
You got the windshield wipers?
580
00:27:10,737 --> 00:27:13,215
I think we should call her Betty White.
581
00:27:13,257 --> 00:27:14,602
Betty White?
582
00:27:19,354 --> 00:27:24,107
Sync and corrections by btsix
41420
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