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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,223 --> 00:00:01,663 Nothing much what's up with you ? 2 00:00:02,311 --> 00:00:03,824 I cannot believe I feel for that. 3 00:00:05,161 --> 00:00:06,123 Gosh. 4 00:00:06,815 --> 00:00:08,997 What ? What ? Where's the funny ? 5 00:00:10,321 --> 00:00:10,956 Give it to me. 6 00:00:13,580 --> 00:00:15,707 Is it me or does it smell like updog in here ? 7 00:00:16,352 --> 00:00:17,029 What's updog ? 8 00:00:17,269 --> 00:00:18,763 Nothing much, what's up with you ? 9 00:00:22,688 --> 00:00:24,201 I walked right into that. 10 00:00:25,068 --> 00:00:26,620 Oh, that's brilliant. 11 00:00:27,653 --> 00:00:29,614 Hey Stanley. Is that jacket made of updog ? 12 00:00:29,711 --> 00:00:30,891 I'm on the phone. 13 00:00:35,978 --> 00:00:37,787 What flavor coffee is that, updog ? 14 00:00:38,159 --> 00:00:39,852 - What's that ? - I don't know. Nothing. 15 00:00:39,886 --> 00:00:41,051 What's up with you ? 16 00:00:42,316 --> 00:00:43,312 - Huh ? - No. 17 00:00:43,345 --> 00:00:44,413 Damn it. 18 00:00:44,687 --> 00:00:45,713 What does that mean ? 19 00:00:46,228 --> 00:00:47,150 What does what mean ? 20 00:00:47,197 --> 00:00:49,242 - That thing you just said. - Just forget it. 21 00:00:50,188 --> 00:00:51,192 Dwight. 22 00:00:51,967 --> 00:00:55,242 Hey, is it me or does this place smell like updog ? 23 00:00:55,308 --> 00:00:56,943 - What's updog ? - Gotcha ! 24 00:00:57,627 --> 00:00:58,793 Oh God ! 25 00:00:59,895 --> 00:01:00,900 Crap. 26 00:01:03,417 --> 00:01:04,662 Nothing. 27 00:01:04,966 --> 00:01:06,512 - How are you doing ? - Good. 28 00:01:07,617 --> 00:01:08,932 How are you doing ? 29 00:01:12,725 --> 00:01:13,782 "So close." 30 00:01:42,725 --> 00:01:44,931 Saison 2 - Episode 13 The Secret 31 00:01:45,007 --> 00:01:47,901 Transcript par Nikki (twiztv.com) Sous-titres par la Catch-22 Team 32 00:01:47,976 --> 00:01:50,022 pmag.f2o.org/theofficeus/ www.forom.com 33 00:01:51,597 --> 00:01:54,031 Today is spring cleaning day here at Dunder Mifflin. 34 00:01:54,167 --> 00:01:56,891 And yes, I know it's January. I am not an idiot. 35 00:01:57,015 --> 00:01:59,631 But if you do your spring cleaning in January, 36 00:01:59,716 --> 00:02:01,743 guess what you don't have to do in the spring ? 37 00:02:02,558 --> 00:02:03,600 Anything. 38 00:02:04,278 --> 00:02:06,582 They say a cluttered desk means a cluttered mind. 39 00:02:06,638 --> 00:02:09,402 Well, I say an empty desk means an... 40 00:02:09,687 --> 00:02:11,351 - Empty mind. - No, that's not... 41 00:02:11,406 --> 00:02:13,290 No. That's not what I was going to say. 42 00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:15,500 Meredith. Men's room. 43 00:02:15,605 --> 00:02:17,700 Make sure you replace the urinal cakes. 44 00:02:17,788 --> 00:02:18,980 They're worn down. 45 00:02:19,026 --> 00:02:21,292 Kevin, file drawers. 46 00:02:22,528 --> 00:02:23,773 Angela, kitchen. 47 00:02:24,217 --> 00:02:26,170 Oscar, dusting. Where's Oscar ? 48 00:02:26,758 --> 00:02:27,710 He's out sick. 49 00:02:28,935 --> 00:02:30,152 That is unacceptable. 50 00:02:30,248 --> 00:02:31,912 I agree. It's unacceptable. 51 00:02:37,827 --> 00:02:39,253 What are you guys doing ? 52 00:02:41,466 --> 00:02:42,830 - Michael. - Yes. 53 00:02:46,025 --> 00:02:47,651 Oscar is out sick. 54 00:02:49,155 --> 00:02:50,263 On a Friday ? 55 00:02:56,366 --> 00:02:58,691 -Can I do some of the talking ? - I will do the talking. 56 00:02:58,716 --> 00:03:00,440 'Kay, let him know that I'm here, though. 57 00:03:00,465 --> 00:03:02,461 What difference does it make that you're here ? 58 00:03:02,496 --> 00:03:04,173 Hi, Oscar, it's Michael. 59 00:03:04,605 --> 00:03:05,951 And Dwight. 60 00:03:06,757 --> 00:03:08,102 Heard you were under the weather. 61 00:03:08,157 --> 00:03:10,030 Yeah, I think I came down with the flu. 62 00:03:10,106 --> 00:03:12,560 Really. Oh, that is a shame. 63 00:03:12,668 --> 00:03:14,852 You know, it's cleaning day here today. 64 00:03:14,907 --> 00:03:17,513 Could've used some of that famous Hispanic cleaning ethic. 65 00:03:17,577 --> 00:03:18,973 Yeah, I feel terrible about it. 66 00:03:19,015 --> 00:03:21,140 Ask for his symptoms, I'm on WebMD. 67 00:03:21,175 --> 00:03:22,451 What are your symptoms ? 68 00:03:23,358 --> 00:03:26,653 I have the chills, I'm feeling nauseous, and my head's killing. 69 00:03:30,357 --> 00:03:31,362 Checks out. 70 00:03:31,387 --> 00:03:34,222 Is there anything you need from me ? I would like to go back to bed. 71 00:03:34,236 --> 00:03:36,383 I need you to go to bed. I need you to get better. 72 00:03:36,457 --> 00:03:38,452 See you Monday, unless you're still sick. 73 00:03:38,577 --> 00:03:41,263 - So, have a great long weekend. - I'll just be sleep... 74 00:03:42,898 --> 00:03:44,541 Okay, first impressions. 75 00:03:44,955 --> 00:03:45,960 He sounded sick. 76 00:03:45,986 --> 00:03:47,710 Which is exactly how you'd want to sound, 77 00:03:47,737 --> 00:03:49,623 if you wanted someone to think you were sick. 78 00:03:49,645 --> 00:03:52,543 - That's exactly what I was thinking. - Question, may I investigate ? 79 00:03:52,578 --> 00:03:54,171 Yeah, drop what you're doing. 80 00:03:54,306 --> 00:03:55,712 Make this a priority. 81 00:03:56,375 --> 00:03:59,010 Because an office can't function efficiently 82 00:03:59,035 --> 00:04:01,820 unless people are at their desks doing their jobs. 83 00:04:02,557 --> 00:04:05,673 - I bought my veil. - Oh my God, that is so exciting. 84 00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:07,532 Can I be a bridesmaid ? 85 00:04:09,148 --> 00:04:10,703 Listen, you don't have to answer now, 86 00:04:10,725 --> 00:04:12,370 but how are you going to do your hair ? 87 00:04:12,406 --> 00:04:15,192 Okay, I was thinking about wearing it down. 88 00:04:15,228 --> 00:04:17,593 Kind of like, I don't know, like... 89 00:04:17,885 --> 00:04:19,071 loose with big curls. 90 00:04:19,105 --> 00:04:21,763 You look like an angel, I'm seriously going to cry. 91 00:04:21,816 --> 00:04:23,640 Wowee, 92 00:04:23,815 --> 00:04:25,093 Mikey likey. 93 00:04:25,158 --> 00:04:27,571 Why don't you wear your hair down like that all the time ? 94 00:04:27,598 --> 00:04:28,731 It's much sexier. 95 00:04:31,288 --> 00:04:33,193 Man, this must be torture for you. 96 00:04:35,385 --> 00:04:37,720 Yeah, on the booze cruise, I... 97 00:04:37,925 --> 00:04:40,532 told Michael about some feelings I used to have for Pam. 98 00:04:42,167 --> 00:04:44,093 I had just broken up with Katy, and... 99 00:04:44,277 --> 00:04:46,122 had a couple of drinks. And... 100 00:04:46,786 --> 00:04:49,283 I confided in the world's worst confidant. 101 00:04:51,218 --> 00:04:52,231 Okay. 102 00:04:54,395 --> 00:04:56,562 - Hey, Mike. - Hey, Jim bag. 103 00:04:58,338 --> 00:05:01,260 Remember that thing I told you on the booze cruise about Pam ? 104 00:05:01,436 --> 00:05:03,403 That was personal. 105 00:05:04,047 --> 00:05:06,160 So, if we could just keep that between you and me, 106 00:05:06,197 --> 00:05:07,092 that would be great. 107 00:05:07,156 --> 00:05:08,170 Really ? 108 00:05:08,695 --> 00:05:10,073 - Who else knows ? - Nobody. 109 00:05:12,908 --> 00:05:14,273 Jim and I are great friends. 110 00:05:14,346 --> 00:05:15,382 We hang out a ton. 111 00:05:16,227 --> 00:05:17,331 Mostly at work. 112 00:05:18,136 --> 00:05:20,603 But the fact that he told me his secret and no one else, 113 00:05:20,645 --> 00:05:22,391 says everything about our friendship. 114 00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:26,392 And it is why I intend on keeping that secret, 115 00:05:26,977 --> 00:05:28,560 for as long as I possibly can. 116 00:05:30,027 --> 00:05:32,533 My lips are sealed. "My lips are sealed." Bangles. 117 00:05:32,617 --> 00:05:34,312 All right, great, thank you. 118 00:05:34,716 --> 00:05:38,291 "Can you hear me, They talk about us," 119 00:05:39,265 --> 00:05:40,470 "Telling lies" 120 00:05:40,846 --> 00:05:41,951 Listen, temp, 121 00:05:43,128 --> 00:05:45,052 I am conducting a little investigation. 122 00:05:45,457 --> 00:05:48,753 So, I am no longer gonna be able to head up spring cleaning. 123 00:05:48,808 --> 00:05:50,322 Do you think you can handle it ? 124 00:05:50,598 --> 00:05:52,871 - Yeah, I think I can handle it. - Do you think... 125 00:05:53,577 --> 00:05:55,312 or do you know ? 126 00:05:55,405 --> 00:05:56,681 I think. 127 00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:01,230 Oh, God. Here. 128 00:06:04,516 --> 00:06:05,820 Hey, whatcha getting ? 129 00:06:05,966 --> 00:06:07,161 I'm going with grape. 130 00:06:07,885 --> 00:06:09,751 Good stuff. Good stuff. 131 00:06:11,307 --> 00:06:12,843 See the game last night ? 132 00:06:12,886 --> 00:06:14,980 - Which game ? - Any of 'em. 133 00:06:18,207 --> 00:06:20,120 So, uh, what's the 411 ? 134 00:06:20,215 --> 00:06:22,421 Any updates on the "P" situation ? 135 00:06:23,165 --> 00:06:24,932 - I don't know what you mean... - P-A-M 136 00:06:24,966 --> 00:06:26,043 - Oh. Yeah. No. - P-A... 137 00:06:26,107 --> 00:06:27,093 Oh, okay. 138 00:06:27,235 --> 00:06:28,681 No, it's okay. We're talking code. 139 00:06:29,205 --> 00:06:30,483 - What is ? - Listen, Stan... 140 00:06:30,515 --> 00:06:32,762 how long does it take you for you to pick out a soda ? 141 00:06:32,806 --> 00:06:35,031 - I'm gonna take off actually. - All right, well. 142 00:06:35,346 --> 00:06:36,432 Cool. 143 00:06:38,416 --> 00:06:39,530 Still deciding ? 144 00:06:42,483 --> 00:06:43,574 Peach iced tea. 145 00:06:45,591 --> 00:06:46,931 You're gonna hate it. 146 00:06:47,048 --> 00:06:49,737 Hey, Oscar, how you doing ? Dwight Schrute calling. 147 00:06:49,949 --> 00:06:51,733 Listen, little question for you, buddy. 148 00:06:51,797 --> 00:06:54,940 I called six minutes ago, and no one answered. 149 00:06:54,997 --> 00:06:56,923 So I as wondering if you could explain... 150 00:06:57,646 --> 00:06:59,681 Oh, I see. So, 151 00:07:00,208 --> 00:07:02,321 sounds like you're too sick to come into work, 152 00:07:02,466 --> 00:07:04,650 but you're well enough to go to the pharmacy. 153 00:07:04,696 --> 00:07:07,501 There are several different ways to tell if a perp is lying. 154 00:07:08,075 --> 00:07:10,680 The liar will avoid direct eye contact. 155 00:07:11,376 --> 00:07:15,591 The liar will cover part of his or her face with his hand. 156 00:07:15,645 --> 00:07:17,131 Especially the mouth. 157 00:07:17,606 --> 00:07:19,361 The liar will perspire. 158 00:07:21,197 --> 00:07:23,213 Unfortunately, I spoke to Oscar on the phone. 159 00:07:23,367 --> 00:07:24,870 So none of this is useful. 160 00:07:30,216 --> 00:07:32,991 It's grrrrrape soda. 161 00:07:33,425 --> 00:07:35,851 Tony the Tiger, you don't hear that much anymore. 162 00:07:35,927 --> 00:07:38,372 - Not so much. - Okay, what is going on here ? 163 00:07:39,488 --> 00:07:41,473 - Nothing. - Oh, really, nothing ? 164 00:07:42,318 --> 00:07:45,130 Fact, you are drinking grape soda. You never drink grape soda. 165 00:07:45,216 --> 00:07:48,013 Fact, you are talking to Jim, you never talk to Jim. 166 00:07:48,096 --> 00:07:50,631 Fact, I love grape soda. I always have. 167 00:07:50,668 --> 00:07:52,680 Fact, Jim and I talk all the time. 168 00:07:53,115 --> 00:07:54,780 We tell each other secrets. 169 00:07:54,876 --> 00:07:56,481 Okay, so what is the secret, Michael ? 170 00:07:56,507 --> 00:07:58,543 - Well, I... - I had asked Michael 171 00:07:58,627 --> 00:08:00,501 if I could head up the Oscar investigation, 172 00:08:00,536 --> 00:08:02,481 and he said that only Dwight 173 00:08:02,598 --> 00:08:05,930 was capable of handling such sensitive material. 174 00:08:08,956 --> 00:08:10,050 Is that true ? 175 00:08:14,277 --> 00:08:18,250 I don't know. Uh, yeah, yeah, it is. 176 00:08:19,195 --> 00:08:20,490 Thank you Michael. 177 00:08:21,248 --> 00:08:23,113 - I know you're telling the truth. - Okay. 178 00:08:23,177 --> 00:08:24,290 I can tell. 179 00:08:25,037 --> 00:08:26,691 - I won't let you down. - Good. 180 00:08:27,776 --> 00:08:28,801 Thanks. 181 00:08:31,797 --> 00:08:33,910 Nice, that was... that was slick. 182 00:08:33,977 --> 00:08:35,940 - What're you doing for lunch ? - I don't know, 183 00:08:35,988 --> 00:08:38,243 I'm probably just gonna eat my ham and cheese sandwich 184 00:08:38,287 --> 00:08:40,913 - in the break room. - Nonsense. No way, no. Why don't... 185 00:08:41,157 --> 00:08:43,072 Why don't I take you out to lunch ? My treat. 186 00:08:43,117 --> 00:08:45,131 No, that's all right. Thank you, though. It's... 187 00:08:45,177 --> 00:08:47,771 I gotta do some cleaning. I should probably stick around here. 188 00:08:47,795 --> 00:08:49,110 You know what we can do ? 189 00:08:49,168 --> 00:08:50,821 Spread out a blanket in the break room, 190 00:08:50,865 --> 00:08:52,590 have a little picnic, order some 'za. 191 00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:56,092 Talk about you-know-who. 192 00:08:56,167 --> 00:08:57,712 - Nope. - The P, to the A, to the... 193 00:08:57,858 --> 00:09:00,531 You know what, let's go out. That was a good idea. Let's go out. 194 00:09:00,556 --> 00:09:01,573 I know just the place. 195 00:09:04,936 --> 00:09:07,271 Oh, man. You should order milk. 196 00:09:08,408 --> 00:09:09,510 Get it ? 197 00:09:10,635 --> 00:09:12,442 Why do I like Hooters ? 198 00:09:13,246 --> 00:09:17,191 Well, I will give you two reasons. The boobs and the hot wings. 199 00:09:19,777 --> 00:09:21,462 Oh, here we go, here we go. 200 00:09:21,527 --> 00:09:24,373 - Bogie at three o'clock. Hi. - Hey, I'm Dana. Welcome to Hooters. 201 00:09:24,396 --> 00:09:27,680 We're not worthy. We're not worthy. 202 00:09:27,886 --> 00:09:32,443 Hello, Dana. I am Michael, and this is Jim. 203 00:09:32,617 --> 00:09:34,443 - And we are brothers. - Nope. 204 00:09:35,047 --> 00:09:37,012 - We're not brothers. - I'm his boss, actually. 205 00:09:37,066 --> 00:09:38,070 And I treat him well. 206 00:09:38,116 --> 00:09:40,321 I'm taking him out to lunch because I can afford it. 207 00:09:40,365 --> 00:09:41,972 And he can have whatever he wants. 208 00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:44,262 I'll just have the ham and cheese sandwich, thanks. 209 00:09:44,367 --> 00:09:45,370 And for you ? 210 00:09:45,397 --> 00:09:47,451 Tell me, Dana. How is your chicken breast ? 211 00:09:47,625 --> 00:09:50,310 Oh, it's great. It's served with our world-famous wing sauce. 212 00:09:50,355 --> 00:09:51,871 Mm, sounds yummy. 213 00:09:51,908 --> 00:09:54,861 I will have a chicken breast. Hold the chicken. 214 00:09:57,278 --> 00:09:58,731 Is that what you really want ? 215 00:10:02,405 --> 00:10:04,161 No, I'm gonna have the gourmet hotdog. 216 00:10:04,225 --> 00:10:05,283 Great. 217 00:10:10,825 --> 00:10:13,292 - Who took all the black ones ? - That's a communal bowl. 218 00:10:13,348 --> 00:10:15,830 So, how did Oscar sound when he called in ? 219 00:10:16,265 --> 00:10:18,841 Sick. Like, lots of sniffling. I don't know. 220 00:10:18,915 --> 00:10:20,133 Sniffling how ? 221 00:10:20,926 --> 00:10:23,522 Hum, how many different ways are there to sniffle ? 222 00:10:23,655 --> 00:10:24,663 Three. 223 00:10:25,548 --> 00:10:27,390 Okay, it was the second one. 224 00:10:27,418 --> 00:10:28,931 Okay, good. Thank you. 225 00:10:28,967 --> 00:10:30,461 That wasn't so hard, now was it ? 226 00:10:36,126 --> 00:10:37,871 What do you like best about Pam ? 227 00:10:38,955 --> 00:10:42,080 - I really don't wanna talk about it. - Her legs or boobs, or... ? 228 00:10:43,626 --> 00:10:45,522 She's easy to talk to, I guess. 229 00:10:46,435 --> 00:10:48,432 And, she's got a really good sense of humor. 230 00:10:48,476 --> 00:10:49,511 Really ? 231 00:10:49,877 --> 00:10:51,682 Never gets any of my jokes. 232 00:10:52,945 --> 00:10:54,030 What about you ? 233 00:10:54,145 --> 00:10:55,220 Her boobs, definitely. 234 00:10:56,565 --> 00:10:57,891 That's not what I meant. 235 00:10:58,216 --> 00:10:59,652 - Here you go. - Oh, thank you. 236 00:10:59,697 --> 00:11:02,242 And I understand, we have a birthday today ! 237 00:11:02,336 --> 00:11:05,713 - Oh, happy birthday, Jim. - Ready, girls ? 238 00:11:05,838 --> 00:11:08,110 - Front side ! - "You put your front side in," 239 00:11:08,158 --> 00:11:10,830 "you put your front side out, You put your front side in," 240 00:11:10,856 --> 00:11:12,580 "And you shake it all about" 241 00:11:12,708 --> 00:11:15,391 "You do the hokey-pokey and you turn yourself around," 242 00:11:15,678 --> 00:11:17,332 "That's what it's all about !" 243 00:11:17,416 --> 00:11:18,592 Thank you. 244 00:11:20,146 --> 00:11:21,660 Thanks. Thanks Dana. 245 00:11:21,786 --> 00:11:23,152 Thank you very much. 246 00:11:26,995 --> 00:11:28,452 That was hilarious. Hey. 247 00:11:29,398 --> 00:11:30,790 What did you guys talk about ? 248 00:11:31,235 --> 00:11:33,262 Just, you know, politics. Literature. 249 00:11:35,027 --> 00:11:36,112 I hate you. 250 00:11:37,816 --> 00:11:39,293 Quick Oscar update. 251 00:11:39,338 --> 00:11:41,761 I have conducted interviews with everyone in the office... 252 00:11:41,787 --> 00:11:43,583 Just go to his house and see if he's sick. 253 00:11:43,617 --> 00:11:45,911 I could've done this investigation in like, 20 minutes. 254 00:11:45,955 --> 00:11:47,712 - Including prep time ? - Just do it. 255 00:11:53,487 --> 00:11:56,672 If I had to, I could clean out my desk in 5 seconds... 256 00:11:57,068 --> 00:11:59,533 and nobody would ever know I had ever been here. 257 00:12:00,788 --> 00:12:02,112 And I'd forget too. 258 00:12:13,856 --> 00:12:15,010 Expense this. 259 00:12:15,657 --> 00:12:16,982 Michael, is that a wig ? 260 00:12:17,995 --> 00:12:19,943 No, it's... 261 00:12:20,808 --> 00:12:22,280 I wear it like that sometimes. 262 00:12:22,318 --> 00:12:24,483 - Is that a wig ? - No. 263 00:12:24,536 --> 00:12:25,692 This is from Hooters. 264 00:12:25,786 --> 00:12:27,360 Yeah, it's a business lunch. 265 00:12:27,396 --> 00:12:29,283 - Did Toby approve this ? - No, he did not. 266 00:12:29,337 --> 00:12:31,062 I don't need his permission. 267 00:12:31,617 --> 00:12:33,511 You just got your corporate credit card back. 268 00:12:33,547 --> 00:12:35,442 Do you really want me to take it away again ? 269 00:12:35,857 --> 00:12:38,432 It's ridiculous. They took my card away because 270 00:12:38,457 --> 00:12:40,641 I spent 80 bucks at a magic shop. 271 00:12:40,925 --> 00:12:43,842 What they don't understand is that I bought the stuff 272 00:12:44,248 --> 00:12:45,783 to impress potential clients. 273 00:12:45,876 --> 00:12:48,272 So business-related, right ? 274 00:12:48,396 --> 00:12:51,442 I put a cigarette through a freakin' quarter. 275 00:12:51,715 --> 00:12:54,333 And you know what, Toby ? They almost bought from us. 276 00:12:54,675 --> 00:12:58,893 - I'm not processing this. - Look, Jim needed a relaxing lunch. 277 00:12:58,968 --> 00:13:00,153 He has been depressed. 278 00:13:00,198 --> 00:13:02,180 And it has been affecting his productivity. 279 00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:03,832 How is that not work-related ? 280 00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:04,970 He seems fine to me. 281 00:13:04,997 --> 00:13:06,800 You're not his friend. You don't know. 282 00:13:06,858 --> 00:13:09,742 He is in love with a girl he works with who's engaged. 283 00:13:09,796 --> 00:13:12,021 So just cut me some slack, please. 284 00:13:12,388 --> 00:13:13,323 Pam ? 285 00:13:18,828 --> 00:13:19,992 Oh, crap. 286 00:13:21,376 --> 00:13:24,133 Angela, who would you choose ? Jim or Roy ? 287 00:13:24,157 --> 00:13:25,701 It's nobody's business, Phyllis. 288 00:13:27,658 --> 00:13:28,691 Roy. 289 00:13:29,996 --> 00:13:32,401 Jim has got it bad for Pam. 290 00:13:33,776 --> 00:13:34,953 Which one is Pam ? 291 00:13:35,866 --> 00:13:38,040 Well, she... Hey, Michael ? 292 00:13:38,787 --> 00:13:41,161 So do you think Jim will try to break up the wedding ? 293 00:13:41,188 --> 00:13:43,621 You know what, Kevin ? Jim is a friend of mine. 294 00:13:43,668 --> 00:13:47,662 So the only people that this crush really concerns is Jim and Pam.. 295 00:13:48,006 --> 00:13:49,230 and me. 296 00:13:51,098 --> 00:13:52,631 As a volunteer sheriff's deputy, 297 00:13:52,695 --> 00:13:54,503 I've been doing surveillance for years. 298 00:13:54,788 --> 00:13:56,021 One time, 299 00:13:56,736 --> 00:13:59,683 I suspected an ex-girlfriend of mine of cheating on me. 300 00:13:59,715 --> 00:14:01,652 So I tailed her for six nights straight. 301 00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:03,452 Turns out, she was. 302 00:14:04,157 --> 00:14:06,362 With a couple of guys, actually, so. 303 00:14:09,718 --> 00:14:10,852 Mystery solved. 304 00:14:11,358 --> 00:14:15,290 Jim, why didn't you tell me that you had a crush on Pam ? 305 00:14:17,378 --> 00:14:18,820 Well, the cat's out of the bag. 306 00:14:18,867 --> 00:14:20,793 I used to have a crush on Pam. 307 00:14:21,205 --> 00:14:23,331 And now I... don't. 308 00:14:25,138 --> 00:14:26,211 Riveting. 309 00:14:28,607 --> 00:14:29,822 Yeah. 310 00:14:30,276 --> 00:14:31,303 No, it's not. 311 00:14:31,388 --> 00:14:32,480 Nice. 312 00:14:34,238 --> 00:14:36,043 She is so hot. 313 00:14:41,076 --> 00:14:42,463 - Hey. - Hey. 314 00:14:43,108 --> 00:14:44,891 Did you find anything good in your desk ? 315 00:14:45,747 --> 00:14:47,250 Coupon for a free sandwich. 316 00:14:47,325 --> 00:14:49,191 - Score. - Expired in August. 317 00:14:49,357 --> 00:14:51,782 And my cell phone charger from two years ago. 318 00:14:51,828 --> 00:14:53,253 - Big day. - Big day. 319 00:14:54,988 --> 00:14:56,270 Hey, uh, listen. 320 00:15:02,068 --> 00:15:05,183 I, told Michael on the booze cruise... 321 00:15:06,016 --> 00:15:07,242 It was so stupid. 322 00:15:10,368 --> 00:15:15,220 I told Michael, that I had had a crush on you... 323 00:15:15,797 --> 00:15:17,930 when you first started here. 324 00:15:19,395 --> 00:15:21,270 Well, I just thought that... 325 00:15:21,936 --> 00:15:24,071 I figured you should hear it from me. 326 00:15:25,098 --> 00:15:27,690 Rather than, I mean, you know Michael. 327 00:15:28,896 --> 00:15:30,193 Right. 328 00:15:30,588 --> 00:15:31,963 And... 329 00:15:32,287 --> 00:15:33,661 seriously. It's... 330 00:15:34,215 --> 00:15:35,551 totally not a big deal. 331 00:15:35,666 --> 00:15:36,702 Okay ? 332 00:15:38,345 --> 00:15:41,273 And when I found out that you were engaged, I mean... 333 00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:43,812 No, I know. Like, I kind of... 334 00:15:44,707 --> 00:15:45,802 Like, I... 335 00:15:46,106 --> 00:15:47,540 I thought that maybe you did. 336 00:15:47,938 --> 00:15:49,871 - When I first started. - Oh, you did ? 337 00:15:50,026 --> 00:15:52,241 No, I mean, just 'cause we, like, got along so well. 338 00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:54,332 No, I know, yeah. You saw through me. Great. 339 00:15:57,127 --> 00:15:59,581 So are you gonna be, like, totally awkward around me now ? 340 00:15:59,607 --> 00:16:01,343 Oh, yeah. Yeah. 341 00:16:02,788 --> 00:16:03,972 Hope that's okay. 342 00:16:08,087 --> 00:16:09,191 And Pam. 343 00:16:09,988 --> 00:16:11,722 It was like, three years ago. 344 00:16:12,228 --> 00:16:14,922 So, I am totally over it. 345 00:16:16,825 --> 00:16:17,801 Cool. 346 00:16:18,175 --> 00:16:19,202 Okay. 347 00:16:27,698 --> 00:16:28,762 Stay low. 348 00:16:32,636 --> 00:16:34,463 This is it. There he is. 349 00:16:34,938 --> 00:16:37,581 He's been gone for at least two... Who is that ? 350 00:16:38,696 --> 00:16:39,733 Come to Papa. 351 00:16:43,416 --> 00:16:45,043 Oh, yes. 352 00:16:46,308 --> 00:16:47,860 Let's roll. 353 00:16:48,207 --> 00:16:49,872 I knew it ! 354 00:16:54,408 --> 00:16:57,282 Oh, man, you are so busted. 355 00:16:57,545 --> 00:17:00,080 Ice skates. Shopping bags. 356 00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:02,370 I think I know what's going on here. 357 00:17:03,138 --> 00:17:04,891 You weren't sick at all. 358 00:17:05,046 --> 00:17:06,142 Who's this ? 359 00:17:06,186 --> 00:17:08,681 This is Dwight Schrute. Who is this ? 360 00:17:09,727 --> 00:17:10,740 Gil. 361 00:17:11,318 --> 00:17:13,043 Are you going to tell Michael ? 362 00:17:13,215 --> 00:17:14,571 How 'bout this ? 363 00:17:14,626 --> 00:17:15,841 I don't tell Michael, 364 00:17:15,957 --> 00:17:18,803 and in exchange, you owe me one great, big, 365 00:17:18,898 --> 00:17:24,432 giant favor redeemable by me at a time and place of my choosing. 366 00:17:24,907 --> 00:17:26,950 Guess what I found out about Oscar tonight ? 367 00:17:28,697 --> 00:17:30,943 He was lying about being sick. 368 00:17:31,646 --> 00:17:34,382 Should I have reported Oscar's malfeasance ? 369 00:17:35,287 --> 00:17:36,572 Probably. 370 00:17:36,626 --> 00:17:38,853 But now I know something he doesn't want me to know. 371 00:17:39,057 --> 00:17:41,183 So I can use his malfeasance... 372 00:17:41,236 --> 00:17:42,652 to establish leverage. 373 00:17:43,176 --> 00:17:47,863 Otherwise, it's just malfeasance, for malfeasance's...s sake. 374 00:17:51,155 --> 00:17:52,933 - Hey. - I know. 375 00:17:53,766 --> 00:17:55,313 I know. I know. 376 00:17:58,178 --> 00:18:01,210 - What happened ? - I... oh. Just, you know, 377 00:18:02,528 --> 00:18:04,910 I was trying... just the expense reports. 378 00:18:04,978 --> 00:18:07,873 And then... God, Toby, you know ? He just... 379 00:18:08,355 --> 00:18:10,033 I know. I just... 380 00:18:11,058 --> 00:18:12,312 I just hope that... 381 00:18:12,988 --> 00:18:15,323 I just hope that this doesn't affect our friendship ! 382 00:18:18,648 --> 00:18:21,373 It's stupid. This is so stupid. 383 00:18:23,948 --> 00:18:25,473 Listen, man, it's... 384 00:18:26,235 --> 00:18:28,663 You know, it's not a big deal. It's gonna be fine. 385 00:18:28,725 --> 00:18:30,150 No, I know. I'm good, I'm good. 386 00:18:30,365 --> 00:18:31,093 It's just... 387 00:18:32,237 --> 00:18:33,252 L ook, 388 00:18:33,778 --> 00:18:36,092 it's one day. Everything's gonna be all right. 389 00:18:36,166 --> 00:18:37,292 - Yeah, okay. - You good ? 390 00:18:37,328 --> 00:18:38,553 - Yeah, I'm good. - Okay. 391 00:18:40,595 --> 00:18:42,673 Creed, did you organize the menu book ? 392 00:18:42,908 --> 00:18:45,552 I thought that was more on a volunteer basis. 393 00:18:46,337 --> 00:18:48,592 No, that was mandatory. 394 00:18:48,688 --> 00:18:50,703 I thought it was a volunteer thing. 395 00:18:55,867 --> 00:18:58,600 Hey, here's your schedule for next week. 396 00:19:00,425 --> 00:19:01,870 - Are you okay ? - Yeah, I'm fine. 397 00:19:01,957 --> 00:19:03,142 Look. 398 00:19:03,647 --> 00:19:05,613 - About you and Jim, I... - Oh, no, that's... 399 00:19:05,668 --> 00:19:06,871 - You don't have to... - No, 400 00:19:06,917 --> 00:19:10,151 I just feel it's my responsibility as your boss-slash-friend... 401 00:19:10,296 --> 00:19:11,682 No, it's really... it's okay. 402 00:19:12,277 --> 00:19:15,282 I know that Jim had, like, a crush on me when he first started. 403 00:19:15,356 --> 00:19:17,162 But that was a long time ago, so... 404 00:19:18,326 --> 00:19:20,903 It wasn't that long ago. It was on the booze cruise. 405 00:19:22,777 --> 00:19:24,531 Jim had a crush on me on the booze cruise, 406 00:19:24,576 --> 00:19:26,770 or he told you about it on the booze cruise. 407 00:19:28,707 --> 00:19:32,773 Okay. Shut it, Michael. I'm done. 408 00:19:33,047 --> 00:19:35,112 That's it, I'm out. 409 00:19:39,468 --> 00:19:40,971 - Ready ? - Yup. 410 00:19:47,958 --> 00:19:49,703 People are always coming to me. 411 00:19:49,748 --> 00:19:51,223 Michael, I have a secret. 412 00:19:51,377 --> 00:19:52,761 You're the only one I trust. 413 00:19:53,688 --> 00:19:54,810 No thanks, 414 00:19:54,876 --> 00:19:56,933 because keeping a secret 415 00:19:57,656 --> 00:19:59,322 can only lead to trouble. 416 00:19:59,568 --> 00:20:02,872 Like, I was watching Cinemax last weekend, this movie. 417 00:20:04,668 --> 00:20:06,131 "Portrait of a... 418 00:20:07,337 --> 00:20:08,343 Prostitute." 419 00:20:08,468 --> 00:20:09,681 Something... 420 00:20:09,727 --> 00:20:12,060 Secrets of a call... More "Secrets of a Call Girl." 421 00:20:12,158 --> 00:20:13,932 And the lead character, Shila, 422 00:20:14,558 --> 00:20:15,833 is framed for murder. 423 00:20:15,866 --> 00:20:16,631 Goes on the run, 424 00:20:17,137 --> 00:20:20,180 and winds up working at a bordello in Malibu. 425 00:20:22,235 --> 00:20:24,433 I don't... I don't wanna live like that. 426 00:20:25,188 --> 00:20:26,361 I like it here. 427 00:20:27,037 --> 00:20:30,190 I don't wanna be Shila. I like being Michael Scott. 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net 30869

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