Original subtitles

This programme contains some violent scenes and some strong language

- You are no longer Carolyn Martens. - I'm Martha Schmitt.

Give me those "come to bed" eyes.

I don't want to be the sexy little maggot at the end of the string.

I want to be the fisherman.

I am in love.

You're not a romantic, are you?

You're a spy!

Stick to the honey trap stuff.

Are you incompetent or just lonely?

- - You'll now work with Kurt Fischer as his partner.

Hermann Metzl.

It scares me how much I love that man.

Every day for the last six months,

he's driven to a heavily guarded building, then drives home.

Greta, can I get my eggs jammy?

Stasi.

Are you trying to run away?

That's a shame.

How long have you been sleeping with the press attache Mr Anderson?

Six months.

I want you to inform on him.

You will report directly to me.

SEXUAL MOANING ON TAPE

- - OG Brunstrom. You're now his shadow.

The Stasi don't know Brunstrom's our guy not theirs.

They'll believe anything we give 'em.

GUNSHOT

Hello. We need you to come with us, please.

Erm, am I in trouble?

- No, no, no. - No, no.

No, we would just like your assistance in clearing up

- a small matter. - Yes.

Hmm.

Comrade Baumann.

He insists he knew nothing about Otto Brunstrom's involvement

with the Americans.

A lie, obviously, but we will crack him.

Like an egg.

What's his relation to Brunstrom?

He's Brunstrom's wife's dentist.

His wife's dentist?

- Yeah. - Yes.

The boss is coming.

The boss.

Colonel Schimmel.

Updates on Brunstrom?

We're conducting valuable interviews.

Hmm, so you've understood the flaw in the

blowing their brains out approach to interrogation.

Out.

I got what I needed from Brunstrom.

You got a physical description of his handler.

Medium height. Medium build. Brown hair. Moustache.

That could only be, what, half a million people?

I made an error in judgment.

You threw a tantrum.

I thought I taught you better than that.

Whatever Brunstrom knew died with him.

You're dismissed.

Uh-uh-uh-uh.

- Je... - Morning!

What the hell are you doing here?

We're surveilling Hermann Metzl.

No, I mean, why aren't you in some Stasi torture basement?

They let me go.

They let you go?

Yeah. Have you been here all night?

Well, I needed something else to do

after my last mission came to an abrupt end.

Oh, I didn't shoot Brunstrom.

Are you going to blame me for the rise of communism, as well?

Well, you do look a bit like Stalin.

- Body. - It's the jowls... - Body.

Jesus. That's Hermann Metzl.

How can you tell?

He's wearing the same socks as yesterday.

They didn't teach you basic observation at finishing school?

Who would want him dead?

Oh!

- - Oh!

It's domestic.

No, it's not.

Believe me - she was desperately in love with him.

We should come back when the heat dies down.

Yeah, maybe she's a secret state-trained assassin!

Or she's on her period.

If they find tampons in there, you owe me ten bucks.

Does your handler talk through the paper, as well?

Crossword? Cute.

It's not cute.

That is the blood, sweat and tears of the best American cryptographers.

Takes days to crack that.

You're meeting him at 4.00pm on a bench in Volkspark.

To be fair, six down was quite hard.

Smile for the party, children!

One, two, three, four, one, two, three, four...

Updates on the scientist?

Not one you're going to like. He's...

- - Dead?

Murdered or natural causes? SEXUAL MOANING ON TAPE

- Very murdered. Lots of blood. - Who did it?

See, this is where it gets interesting...

- The fiancee? - Yeah. - Damn. Women are crazy.

Then why am I working with one?

It's good cover.

But don't let the English take over.

They're dinosaurs. Stuffy, obsessed with...

Tradition's just something they don't understand.

They think they can sweep in with their guns and their money.

Don't let them railroad us.

So why do I have to keep working with him?

Take it up with top brass.

But they don't understand.

He's cocky, he's in love with himself,

he thinks he knows everything...

She's got this, like, snooty look to her,

like she knows better than you.

She doesn't. She's totally inexperienced.

Oh, and cold. Like, sexless,

which is weird cos we...

- - "Made love" is a more polite phrase to use, Martha.

Well, dig into this Hermann Metzl situation.

This job was a cover for something,

and now he's suddenly been killed by the woman he was about to marry?

I'll bet my mother there's something dodgy going on.

Anything else to discuss?

Hmm...

She got taken in by the Stasi?

Hmm...

And they just let her go?

Hmm...

She's bullshitting.

Get to the bottom of it!

If she turns, you know what to do.

- Hmm... - Yes?

No, just...

...business as usual.

FRIEDRICH ROARS

Come in.

I have summarised the day's developments for you.

Why is there a civilian police report in here?

The victim was on our radar as a potential asset for foreign spies.

Hermann Metzl, a state scientist, murdered in his home last night.

Metzl works on high-security projects. Worked.

But he was killed by his fiancee, so it's...

It's probably nothing.

I'm going to send someone to check it out just in case.

Who do you want to assign?

Er... someone expendable.

We won't let Comrade Baumann down.

That's us. Quick, quick, quick.

Damn, that guy was punching.

A man has died,

but, yes, he was definitely punching.

Now, why would someone with a diploma in molecular biology

work in a sausage factory?

There's that observation I taught you.

Oh, my God, look at this!

Hey, look at this.

All right, I'm not actually stupid.

No. The floor is scuffed.

- What's in it? - I have no idea.

And unless you have a degree in molecular biology,

I don't think you will either.

Must be something worth hiding.

We'll take it with us, get it to some experts.

So how did you get out of Stasi custody anyway?

Did you sleep with someone?

I did not sleep with someone.

Handjobs count.

You might be used to wanking your way out of situations,

but I used a little thing called leverage.

What did you leverage?

I agreed to inform on my handler for them.

I know you're new, but that's generally frowned upon.

I'm informing on him as Martha Schmitt.

They think I'm German and they think we're having an affair.

It's no big deal. I just have to go into the Stasi building once a week

and cultivate a direct relationship with one of their senior officers.

Who, erm, who do you report to?

Friedrich Baumann, the head of counterespionage

against British targets.

Well, not jealous any more.

You'll be dead in a week.

Why do you think the seal was broken on the door?

I don't know. Nosy neighbours.

And what are we looking for?

Anything.

Something.

And how do I know if anything is something?

- - Let's go.

No. We need the notebook.

Hey, Otto. What's all this crap?

I don't know.

But if it's weird, we should take it.

I'm kind of starving. Do you think he has any snacks?

Let's have a look.

Well, he's got pickles.

Pickles are not a snack.

Of course pickles are snacks. What are you talking about?

Pickles are, like, parts of meals.

What, are you just going to eat a pickle like an apple?

You sound insane right now.

Check out the bedroom.

- I'll check out the bathroom. - OK.

The bathroom is... a bathroom.

Hold on a minute.

BELT CLINKS, FLY UNZIPS

TRICKLING

Oh, that's the ticket.

TRICKLING CONTINUES

TRICKLING STOPS

TRICKLING RESUMES

HE MOUTHS

TRICKLING CONTINUES

- Otto! - What?

He's got a keg of beer from Munich!

- A whole keg?! - Yes!

Wait! Man!

I mean, I'd say this keg is evidence, right?

Yeah. Naturally.

Well done.

Let's go.

DOOR CLOSES

Don't pull that shit again.

They took the notebook.

But they didn't take this.

Let's see how the sausage is made.

- Hi! - Hi!

Are you going somewhere?

No.

Then why are you wearing that?

Oh, because I want to take it to the dry cleaners.

OK.

OK, it's because my border officer goes to the dry cleaners

every Friday to get his guard uniform dry cleaned

and I really need an excuse to go, as well.

You don't need to engineer an elaborate situation

just to talk to him.

Oh, no, I'm not going to talk to him. Are you crazy?!

- OK, then... - But I really do want to talk to him.

I bet he has a really smooth voice. Do you think he's a good singer?

Why don't you ask him instead of pining from afar?

Oh, but pining from afar is the best kind of relationship.

Do you think he could be... you know?

Like, I mean, I know he's definitely not, right?

But he kind of like... He, like, stands like he...

Stefan, listen to me. I don't care.

I don't care at all.

But I will do everything in my power to get you together with this man.

- Do you know why? - Oh, my God, why?

Because then you'll talk to him and not me.

You are going to go to that dry cleaners and you are going to talk

to that border guard, or so help me God, I will beat you with my shoe.

He's actually an officer.

OK. OK! OK.

OK, bye-bye!

Open the gate.

Herr Anderson likes to make small talk after sex.

I think it's part of his Englishness, to be polite.

He mentioned going to play golf in West Berlin.

His handicap is 15, although I have no idea what that means.

And his wife wants to buy a new sofa

despite their current one being perfectly fine.

Does he make you come?

Excuse me?

Herr Anderson.

Does he bring you to orgasm?

Er, you know, I don't... I don't...

Men are 14% more likely to divulge in women

they believe they've satisfied sexually.

That's incredibly specific.

We did a study.

Being a good informant requires training.

It's a skill.

I'm willing to learn.

Can you fake orgasm?

Yeah.

Right.

SHE MOANS No.

That's wrong.

You've been watching too much Western pornography.

Perhaps it would be helpful if you told me what you want me to find.

Weakness.

Weakness can be exploited.

People don't show weakness to strangers.

That kind of information is intimate.

Listen to this tape... and practise.

Her orgasm performed the best with our focus group.

Schmitt... you're dismissed.

Hi.

Erm...

They always take forever, don't they?

Do you think they heard me?

I have authorised an undercover mission

to the factory that Metzl worked at.

Your counterpart will provide you with counterfeit access cards

and disguises.

SEXUAL MOANING ON TAPE

You're allowed to be a little excited.

I love disguises!

- Well, I don't have anything else for you. - OK.

Where are you going?

It's only been two minutes.

You care what the Stasi think about your stamina?

It's on record forever. Yes, I do. Sit your arse down.

SHE SIGHS

How's Anne?

Er, better.

She's started painting her nails. She's having her hair done tomorrow.

I think she's finally settling in.

But, er, you know, she's right, I think we should get a new sofa.

SEXUAL MOANING ON TAPE CONTINUES

Is this an acceptable amount of lovemaking?

OK.

- - These disguises are cutting-edge.

We can breeze right past security. They won't look twice.

That's American made quality right there.

I'm not coming out.

Oh, come on. Don't be shy.

I never knew you were so beautiful.

Why do you look like Robert fucking Redford?!

Hey, don't look at me. This is just what they sent me from Langley.

You should be happy. Ugly women are basically invisible.

It's an awful lot of security for a sausage factory.

Maybe they've got a secret recipe.

TAPPING

Do you remember the plan?

Start at the top, find out what Metzl was up to, get out.

No nonsense this time.

- Nervous? - No!

Let me give you some advice.

Why is this lift so slow?

Stealth keeps you safe.

We are ghosts. No-one can see us.

Oh, so this is where the memorial is.

What a sad day.

It's just tragedy.

What do you mean? That guy was a dick.

Oh. We didn't really work with him,

- I... - Oh, yeah, you're lucky.

He was rude. Always smelled kind of damp.

He never came to any ice cream socials.

He must've had some friends here.

Well, he worked next to Achmedova over there.

I just wanted to offer my condolences.

I know you and Hermann were close.

Oh. Erm, we weren't. I mean, well, we were physically close,

but... not in that way. We just shared an office, so...

It's still a shock, though.

Well...

You look... You look pale.

Are you OK?

You should sit down.

- Oh. - Oh, it's so crowded here.

I didn't get a lot of sleep.

Let's get you some coffee.

Your office? Mine's a disaster zone.

You guys are so nice.

I know they sent a memo around about misuse of instruments,

but I work so much better when the coffee is nice...

Can you make the mixed stuff taste good?

Now that would be a scientific breakthrough.

- I really think I've cracked it. - Wow.

It's all about the agitation of the grounds.

- So, Hermann... - So do you want a cup?

No, wait, I'll make you one in the pot, as well,

because you need a control to see the difference.

The crap we have upstairs keeps clogging the filter in our machine.

That one. That one's miles better.

Oh! That's the Kamilla method.

Wow!

Erm, I forgot the milk.

Oh, I'll get some.

I know purists wouldn't add milk, but I like it.

Oh!

Gravity!

- - Comrade Muller to report to the Observation Room 12B.

You and Hermann must've gotten on, sharing an office.

You were lucky. My colleague, the blond guy,

he's a total pig, I can't stand him.

I know what it's like to share an office with a difficult man.

Hmm. Well, Hermann was not exactly...

...nice.

You seem pretty upset by his passing.

It's not him I'm upset about.

His fiancee?

Mm. I met her when I invited Hermann over for dinner once.

Me and Greta kept in touch.

She is so sweet, and I just can't picture her...

SHE RETCHES

What was their relationship like?

Er, well, she was crazy for him,

once they got over that rough patch.

Rough patch?

It seemed like they were going to break up for ages.

Well, Greta said he was a slob, he was bad in bed,

- he never took her out... - What happened?

Yeah, she was ready to dump him, and then...

...sunshine and rainbows.

Oh, I forgot the sugar too.

KAMILLA CHUCKLES

DOG WHINES

MICRO CAMERA CLICKS

I hope that you're not being saddled with all of Hermann's work

now that he's... not with us any more.

Oh, we weren't on the same project.

He was on some much more advanced stuff,

so manipulating neural pathways, that kind of thing, but...

Oh!

What is it?

I didn't know you've been on holiday, Zero K.

Zero K?

Zero Kelvin. Absolute zero.

The coldest possible thing in the universe.

Basically, they think I'm frigid.

And I'm not, I just, erm, I don't believe in it before marriage, so...

I think I left some... My Bunsen burner... Oh!

Good job I made five more.

It's just a joke. We all rib each other around here.

Are you new? I haven't seen you before.

- I just started. - At which project?

I'm more general admin support.

Admin is on level two. They don't have access to this level.

- I was... - Let me see your access card.

Sure, just let me...

WHACK

HE GASPS

We have to go.

- Why? - Punched a guy in the throat.

OK, we have to go.

HE COUGHS

Oh! Are you OK?!

Asthma?

Nuts? You're allergic to nuts!

I don't know what they're doing here,

but I don't think they're making sausages.

He's having an allergic reaction!

Reh...

Reh...

Reh...

What nut starts with R?

Reh...

He's going to raise the alarm. We're not going to make it.

We'll make it.

Why's he coming out?

Don't panic.

Reh...

Red...

Redhead!

Short work day?

Oh, you know, she's, er, she's feeling sick, so, er...

PHONE RINGS

Look, I, er, I'd really like to get her to a doctor, so...

Let's go!

Hello?

Wrong way!

- Seat belt. - What?

Seat belt.

Oh, shit.

ENGINE REVS

GUNSHOTS

Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God!

You really punched that guy in the throat?

Yeah. And you just bammed through those gates.

I didn't know that guard would have a fucking Kalashnikov.

I could feel the wind from that bullet.

- The nose... - Keep it on.

HE CHUCKLES

Halt.

Halt.

What did you find on the rest of the level?

By the looks of it, weird-ass brain experiments.

But I need to find a different way to phrase that

when I write my report.

The scientist I talked to, Achmedova,

told me Metzl was researching neurological manipulation.

You think Metzl was experimenting on his fiancee?

And I think he kept the key to it all in a little notebook

behind the fridge.

We need to get that notebook back.

It's in the Stasi building.

Good thing one of us has a reason to go inside.

Why are we taking her to Hohenschonhausen?

They've got maximum security cells up there.

- Maximum security? - Mm-hm.

For her? What the hell did she do?

I don't know, but the order came from Baumann.

Oh.

RADIO STATIC

SIREN WAILS

VOICES ON TV

KNOCK AT DOOR

I think you picked up my order.

Erm, I'm sorry. I don't really know what I was thinking Erm...

I thought it would be funny to try it on.

It's not funny, obviously.

National security is a serious business,

and I deeply respect the sacrifice you guys make to keep us safe.

It's not right.

I know. I know. I can only apologise. I...

There. Very handsome.

DOORBELL RINGS

Can I come in?

Uh-uh!

What intel do you have for me?

Herr Anderson is buying his wife a new sofa.

You didn't listen to the cassette.

He bought a new sofa because he is the one sleeping on it

more often than not. It's not a happy marriage.

Evident by the fact that he's having an affair.

With you. Have you noticed that at least?

Perhaps you should not turn your nose up at my instructions.

Frau Anderson is not sleeping with her husband,

but she is dolling herself up, getting her hair done.

Either she's having an affair or she wants to have one.

I'm sure you understand men, but I understand women.

I apologise.

You're more capable than I gave you credit for.

Men often underestimate beautiful women.

You don't consider yourself beautiful?

SHE LAUGHS

I'm... OK.

You're remarkable.

I know women too.

I wasn't falling for it. I was calling your bluff.

Ah, please. It was like showing offal to a dog.

Get out of my office.

And next time I give you homework, I expect you to do it.

Arsehole!

Complete arsehole!