Original subtitles

Come closer.

Have a seat.

Tell me, what makes you think you're so qualified for this assignment?

Well, my previous occupation was Captain of the Galactic Alliance.

But, um, after my last mission, I was, uh, retired.

You let... Experiment 626, escape!

It wasn't my fault! The little trog... Calm down!

This job has absolutely nothing to do with 626.

I know what the job's about.

And I believe I know the location of the item you seek.

Where is it? Where?

A tiny planet in Gamma Quadrant. They call it Earth.

Take off your shoes, put down your hat, turn on the music and we'll get

somewhere. Dance, dance, dance till your toes get tanned.

We're gonna have us a ball in the beach, slice inside.

Hug me a heap, sway me a lot. We got a lot of ocean if it gets too hot.

Ooh, baby, take my hand.

We'll have some real rock and fun in the sun.

Hey, Nani!

You need some help?

Let me give you a hand.

Where's Lilo?

She's not with you?

Look! A parking space!

Ridiculous earth vehicle. Needs evil genius tune-up. I am thrilled!

My very first day at an earth- I've been studying mingling with locals.

Hang loose!

Whatever.

Are you sure Wooly One Piece bathing suit is from proper century?

Absolutely.

Put on your hat.

Hey, have you two seen Lilo?

We thought little girl was with you.

Today you take your rightful place as part of the Hawaiian community.

Are you ready?

Now remember, in Hawaii, everybody calls each other cousin. Not because we're all

related, but because we're one big ohana. One happy family.

You'll be fine.

Just say, aloha, cousin.

Go on.

Aloha, cousin.

Huh?

Aloha, cousin?

Mmm, smells good.

Okay, who wants to slice the pineapple?

Laka taka!

Oh, no.

Not good.

Hey, that's my chainsaw.

He's like totally freaky. I told Lilo no pets

Oh

I brought ice cream.

It wasn't that bad.

After you left, I got to help put out the fire.

No cousins.

You're a part of Arowana now.

But getting everybody else to like you is harder.

Trust me.

I know.

I'm freaky.

You're different.

You're one of a kind.

Like... Frankenstein.

You sure you can watch Lilo for a couple of hours?

You two go.

Have a good time. Everything here is completely under control.

Well,

I'm even fixing my very first Earth dinner.

You're fixing dog food. I know.

It makes its own gravy.

Here,

why don't you take this?

Leafy greens?

No. It's money. For pizza.

They deliver.

Really?

Fascinating.

Don't worry.

They'll be fine.

Yeah. I guess they're okay.

But I think Pliggly tries on my clothes.

Ooh.

Insert tab A into chromosome B?

Um, Jamba?

Spies! Oh, 626, what do you want? I'm busy doing genius work here.

Oh, Kamja Rugga.

No cousins?

Well, of course not.

We are each one of a kind, you and I. Evil genius scientist and evil genius

creation. All alone in infinite universe.

Sure, you have maybe found tiny adopted Earth family, but we have no, as you

say, cousins.

What is this?

Must be the pizza.

I have to take care of thing.

What is that?

What is what?

Huh? You can't have Stitch, you big dummy.

Think of your father.

I'm not fat, and I'm not here for the failed experiment 626.

Stitch!

Where's Chumba?

You must take this and hide.

Oh, no. This is something bad.

Evil and bad.

Take it. No.

Very funny.

Not to make a peep, my little one-eyed one. Our entire galaxy is doomed.

But how am I supposed to breathe?

Jumba Jukiba.

Cunt. Not see long time.

Where are they?

They? Who they?

The other 625 experiments.

You must have me confused with other evil genius scientists.

What have we here?

Uh, he's, uh, ping-pong ball. He's earth sport, like tennis, but tinier.

You're a bad liar, Jumba. Where are the other experiment pods?

I never discuss scientific research with big dummies.

Then perhaps you'll discuss it with your former partner, Dr.

Hamsterville. Hamsterville is alive?

And he wants his experiments back.

What are we gonna do?

Where are you going?

Wait up!

Jumbo and Pleakley ship.

Don't we need the keys?

Thanks for the, um, well, I guess it was a date.

Was it? We split the bill.

Yeah, but I paid the tip.

David, I'm not ready for a real date yet. Things are still kind of lo-lo

around here.

Aw, come on.

How bad can it be?

Oh, no.

Lilo?

Lilo! Anybody here?

Lilo!

No sign of her. Or Stitch, or those other two. Look, you stay here in case

anybody comes back. I'm going to go into town to look for them.

I'm sure it's okay.

She's probably just hanging out with her new friends.

Computer, lock hyperdrive coordinates on.

Six to six.

Police to be sharpened in the shootings.

Right up his afterburner.

Damage. Engine one, 75% capacity.

50% capacity.

Activate boosters.

That way!

That way!

Reroute engine power to rear cannon and lock on target.

Target locked.

Fire.

Good theory.

Mahalo.

My turn this time.

Hyperdrive activated.

I think we're out of gas.

This is an emergency announcement from Earth Central Command.

Aliens from outer space have invaded Earth and are kidnapping our most

brilliant scientists for unknown purposes.

Lilo, I knew you were okay.

Hey, you're missing our favorite movie.

Does Nani know I was out past my bedtime?

Yeah, she's out looking for you.

Jumbo was kidnapped by Gantoo.

The big dummy?

Yep. You and Stitch can handle him.

Hey, where'd Stitch go?

Stitch?

Stitch?

Piggly!

Oh, gosh.

Oh, my.

Sitting first, talking second.

Camera ready now.

Jumba! Gerto kidnapped Jumba!

I know.

He was after this.

Hey!

Container ready.

Select experiment.

It's some of Chumba's evil science.

Look at that.

It's more illegal genetic experiments.

You mean there are more besides Stitch?

Well, Stitch is number 626.

These must be the other 625.

been dehydrated for transport.

How do they work?

Well, I'm no evil genius, but I'd say if any of these pods get wet, they would

instantly rehydrate into one of the 625 prototype stitch experiments, each with

its own unique and highly destructive capability.

But I'm just guessing.

With more stitches, I bet we could rescue Jumba.

Tape and draw.

And as for you two, you must never repeat, never open that container.

If those pods were to get wet, it could create mass mayhem and planet-wide

panic. Got it?

Got it.

Smish.

David, I looked everywhere. Have you heard anything?

They're fine, Nani.

They're playing upstairs.

Hey, you know, I'm gonna get you a cell phone.

Lilo!

Thank goodness you're okay.

Stop it! You're hugging me to death!

Where were you?

What happened?

Well, Captain Giantu came back and kidnapped Jumba, so me and Stitch hot

-wired the spaceship, and we chased him into outer space, which was really cool.

But then... Wait, wait, wait.

While David and I went to dinner...

You went to outer space?

I'm not finished.

Sorry.

So, Gantu got away and we ran out of power. And then Stitch saved the ship,

and then we came home, and then you came home, and tried to hug me to death.

Now I am finished.

I thought you said I had nothing to worry about.

I was locked in a footlocker. And why are you wearing my favorite T-shirt?

It's not even your color.

So what are we gonna do about Jumba?

What am I, an astronaut?

He was abducted by aliens, Lilo.

But we can't just forget about him.

He's part of our Ohana.

I know it's late, but I need to talk to Cobra Bubbles. It's an emergency.

Well, he's asleep right now.

So wake him up.

Well, I'm going to make a few calls myself using my trusty intergalactic

periwinkle pages.

There's only so many phones in the galaxy.

Hello? Planet I?

Is Chumba there?

Well, you don't have to be rude.

I bet one of those other experiments could help us.

Too bad Pleakley said not to open it.

He's also said not to get them wet.

Hello? Planet Up?

Is Jumpa there?

Go jump in the lake. Well, same to you, fella.

Wait! We don't need all of them.

Just look for one that can recharge the ship.

Select experiment.

Experiment 221.

Primary function, electrical power search.

Experiment 221 activated.

Cousin lost.

Chumba lost.

You have a lot of lost issues.

Prepare yourself for cruel and interminable torture.

I'm not afraid of torture.

Excepting maybe a little bit. I'm certain Dr.

Homsterfield will find your little bit.

Gantoo, you're late.

Dr. Jacques Van Hamsterville.

Hamsterville! It is Hamsterville!

You stole my evil genius experiments, Jamba. Perhaps since you paid for

experiments, the evil is yours. But genius was all mine.

What? Come down here and say that!

Honey, you're shorter than I'm remembering.

But you still have twitchy nose like gerbil. I am not gerbil-like. I am

hamster-like.

You with your four eyes and inexplicable accent.

Anyway,

I did find this one experiment pod.

Jumba refused to reveal the location of the others.

So I brought him to you for interrogation. Only one? You incompetent

fish head of a minion. I'll kick your stinky oversized feet.

Wait.

What?

Interrogation? All right, you take this.

And that.

Don't just stand. Bring me a fun book!

It couldn't have gone too far.

Maka Maka! Sasa!

Maybe he went this way.

Hey!

If you do not tell me where the other experiments can be found, I will begin

with the threatening!

Your threatenings don't threaten me. Then I will threaten your family!

have no family perhaps i will activate the one experiment pod and leave you

towards tortures experiment six to five oh he has all powers the same as six to

six he'll torture your little dough boy buddy into

Any second now, you'll hear his tortured cries of regret.

Please let me out. I'll tell you everything.

Any second now.

He's pathetic, screaming, begging for mercy.

Any second.

Should they write about?

No!

I don't hear anything.

Shut up!

Funny thing, 625 has all powers of 626.

Even has advanced language programming.

Unfortunately, he's also a lazy coward.

But makes great sandwiches.

Ham or tuna?

on the other side of the fence.

Lilo, what are you doing here?

You're having a camp out, but you told me everyone was sick.

You're a liar.

No, I'm not.

It's in your yard, right over there.

That's a bug electrocutor, not an alien.

You and your disconfigured dog are total freaks.

Yeah!

You can spit acid on him if you want to.

Come on, Stitch.

Master of bedtime.

And don't forget to brush your teeth!

One more call before bed.

Hello?

Is Jumba there?

This is him speaking, kid.

Jumba!

It's Jumba!

Quickly! How did you get number for Gantu's detention cell?

I just called the number listed here.

Detention cell phone.

be some way to make that morally bankrupt scientist talk?

I think I'm going to make a sandwich.

Hey, Gantu, how about a sandwich?

I don't want a sandwich.

You sure?

Last of the bologna. I don't like bologna.

Too fatty.

Unauthorized communication intercepted. Detention cell two.

So then Monkey says to Rabbi, what's going on here?

Excuse me.

Interrupting punchline. Sorry.

Stop apologizing!

Sorry.

Give me that!

Now listen to me, you collar of Jamba, you!

Yes. Yes.

It's the kidnapper.

Okay. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. Good.

Fine. What's he saying?

Oh, he says he wants all 624 other experiments as a ransom.

Or we'll never see Jamba alive!

I will then tell you the ransom exchange location and call you many nasty names.

Hang that up.

No, slam it!

Oh, sorry.

You called?

Cobra. How are you?

Sleepy. Oh, sorry.

Cobra! Thank goodness.

It's terrible.

Just terrible.

Jump has been... Kidnapped. That's right, by... Dr.

Humsterville. And he's demanding a... Ransom. Of the... Other experiments.

You're good.

How do you know all that stuff?

Information is power, and I like power.

What do you think we should do?

Wait for Humpsterville's next call. Once we have the rendezvous location,

Pleakley and I will exchange all the remaining experiments for Jumba. From

there, we follow the governmental procedure.

And what's the governmental procedure?

Classified. Right.

This is now an intergalactic incident.

You are to take no further action other than what I have indicated.

Is that clear, Lilo?

Yep.

No action.

That kidnapper wants all the experiments.

We've got to find the sparky little electrical one we lost or no Jumba.

We've got to search the entire island.

Stitch?

working on your chart. As you can see, it's not nearly as bad as Stitch's was.

Too bad we have to give you away.

No. What do you mean, no?

We gotta get Jumba back.

Cousin. Ohana.

You know what?

You're right.

It's like I said.

You're all...

Be calm. Get the rendezvous information, then hang up. Calm, rendezvous, hang up.

Here I go.

Hello? Hello, Mr. Pliackly. Hi, this is the new You Wonder Girdle Company

calling regarding your order.

Oh, wrong number.

Girdle. I wouldn't need a girdle for my disguise because it's an undergarment.

Why would I use a girdle?

This is an unfortunate complication.

I know. We can take the ridiculous Earth vehicle.

Where's Pleakley and Cobra? They went to the lighthouse to get Jumba back.

But... And I've got to go to work. But... No more buts.

Just stay here.

What a stunning example of Earth architecture.

Why isn't the big light old flashy spinning aroundy? The beacon hasn't been

lit for years.

Too costly.

Humsterville should be here by now.

That's hamster wheel?

He sounded much bigger on the phone.

Stop talking about me, you gossipy pea brains.

Do you have the ransom?

Do you have Jumba? That's my question to you, sir.

Bring out the forehead fathead.

Jumba, you're okay.

Enough with your teary reunion.

Commence with the giving me all the experiments.

623 experiments logged and functional.

623?

There's one missing!

Code Yellow, delay movement.

My ransom demand was for all the experiments!

You're trying to pull a sneaky thing!

What is one tiny experiment between old partners?

Quiet! I am blaming you for this!

This buzz of him.

Gladly. No!

He's allergic to plasma blasts! Listen to him!

is true.

Wait! Wait!

Wait!

I've got the missing experiment.

What? Who is this?

A little earth girl who can be a gigantic pain in the rear.

Well done, Lilo. Now give it to the diminutive gerbil-like creature.

Hamster-like!

Not gerbil! Hamster!

Give it to me!

No! Lilo, it's the only way you can save Jumba.

You've named it.

Yep. We're gonna name all the experiments.

Oh. Iggy Pataba. Shut up with all your nuts. Shut it up. Hand it over.

Nope.

Lilo, do what he says.

Whose side are you on?

He's on saving my life side.

His good side. You fail to comprehend the complexity of the situation.

Do you want your Jamba?

Make your choice, little girl.

Stay calm, we're completely safe here.

Code green, now, now!

Lock all sensors on the fugitive.

Activate external sound.

Dr. Hamsterwheel, you are hereby ordered to surrender.

It's Hamsterville, you absurd, grand, cuntily woman with your large, pointy

collar! Prepare to fire.

Your electrical surge. All systems failing.

Brace yourselves.

Hurry up, you quiet, lumbering idiot.

This is Cobra. 10-13.

10-13. All systems offline.

No injuries reported.

We're all right.

Thank goodness our little broken family is back together.

I have family?

Ooh.

I have family.

And you've got family too, Stitch.

We're getting those experiments back.

Lilo! Lilo!

Lilo!

Well, now what do we do?

We hope they can pull off another miracle.

Container ready. Select experiment.

So many nasty experiments.

I shall wreak mayhem on the stinky galactic empire.

Thank you.

You little trog.

You want it? Catch!

Get them back!

Get them back!

The window!

The window's open! Warning. Window is open.

has saved the experiments is very good.

Very good?

Well, it's not very good. Well, it's the opposite of very good. It's very bad.

625 experiment pots activated by water raining down on one of the wettest pots

on Earth?

Actually, it's only 623.

I'm afraid Fleet Clear's right.

This is indeed very bad.

This should keep you two out of trouble until Dr.

Homsterville can dispose of you properly.

Well, that didn't exactly work out. But at least we saved all the cousins!

Maybe Jumba and Preakley and Ani and David will find him a nice home.

Don't be scared, Stitch.

I'll figure out a way to rescue you.

Nobody gets left behind.

Or forgotten.

You think you're so... Phone book! Phone book!

Phone book, yes sir.

One second.

You think you're so clever, don't you?

You think you've outsmarted the infamous Dr. Jacques Van Homsterville.

Well, you made one grave mistake.

You're all so adorable little Hawaiian girl.

You're delivered to me experiment number 626.

I will now clone him and create my own personal army.

What shall I do with a little earth girl?

These have no use to me.

Struggle all you want. You think you're so super strong with your... I can lift

up to three thousand times my weight.

Well, that is exactly why I designed this restraint to hold your weight.

I know a nice zoo that will pay handsomely for an exotic specimen like

you.

Unfortunately,

my patented cloning process has one nasty side effect.

I have to cut you in half!

Emergency alarm activated.

Location? Detention cell 2.

Whoa, not again.

625? What's the emergency?

I need to know our coordinates.

I just got us a deal on a bunch of baloney.

The suspense is killing me!

Cousin. 30 seconds.

Dad! Help!

I wasn't really going to cut you in half.

20 seconds.

One. Teleporting now.

Huh?

Lulu!

Stitch?

I'm in this one!

Oh. Whoa.

Below the order sent.

Sending little girl in ten seconds.

Nine.

What are you doing in here?

You're not taking my ship.

Hey, Gantu, where's my bologna? I got nothing here but cheese.

Where are they? Who?

The Earth Girl and 626.

I don't know. Not in here.

Navigation is disabled. Warning, navigation disabled.

Ah,

grilled cheese.

You have the money now.

I don't think we're going to be going anywhere.

Looks like you and I are working together, huh?

Sandwich? No, I don't want a sandwich.

Um, unless you have egg salad?

Nope, only cheese.

Have you not been paying attention?

My genius experiment!

Another miracle.

These manacles are too tight, you miserable, oppressive, do-gooders, you!

Dr. Hamster Wheel.

Hamster Wheel! Hamster Wheel!

Retouch badass.

You're welcome.

Place him in the high-security gerbil cage.

Hamster cage! I am Hamster Lodge!

I will be back, you slumbering... Now,

what are we gonna do with you? Sparky let's see you like making big bunches of

power, right?

But you keep blowing up things like light bulbs and spaceship consoles you

need something really big to play with Something that won't explode when you

touch it.

What is it stitch?

Well,

if that isn't a pretty sight.

This planet just never ceases to amaze.

It's just 500 watt alternating current powering catadioptric lens at 600,000

candela.

It is beautiful.

Which makes it all the more tragic that Eos is now infested with illegal genetic

experiments. I'm afraid I have no choice but to evacuate the planet and have them

destroyed. What? You can't destroy the experiments.

They're Ohana cousins.

And each one of them has a place where they belong.

Just like Sparky belongs at the lighthouse.

And Stitch belongs with me.

Very well, I won't destroy the experiments.

If you can retrieve each and every one and find, as you say, the one

place where each belongs.

But they're out there right now, and they're all very bad, right?

Yes, it's true. But once experiment is turned to good, it's completely useless

for bad.

I'm trying to fix for six to seven.

I hereby designate you an undercover intergalactic experiment retriever. And

Stitch, too.

Oh, mahalo. That's crazy talk!

There are 625... 33.

Ugh, a whole lot of pods out there.

How are you gonna find them?

It'll be easy.

Like an Easter egg hunt.

Yes, but even more deadly.

You must find them before they get wet.

623! Whatever.

Are you sure they can handle this?

Lilo is a very persistent little girl. And with 626, they make one hot shot

evil genius experiment catching beef.

Get over here!

Now you can see

Nothing but these clear blue skies. Love it has found you and when it surrounds

you. It's just like paradise.

Now the door has swung wide open.

Now your heart has taken wing.

Feel that magic in the air. Oh, hear your spirit sing.

Hello.

Thank you.

Hey,

maybe the Grand Councilwoman will let us go home with her this time.

I'll get the wig.