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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
2
00:01:00,032 --> 00:01:02,631
They all work. All four of them.
3
00:01:02,632 --> 00:01:04,871
OK, good. Good to test them.
4
00:01:04,872 --> 00:01:07,231
How is he? Charles? Is he ready?
Erm...
5
00:01:07,232 --> 00:01:09,551
CHRIS TARRANT:
'Emmerdale. Hollyoaks.
6
00:01:09,552 --> 00:01:12,219
'EastEnders. Coronation Street.'
7
00:01:13,752 --> 00:01:14,912
Emmerdale?
8
00:01:14,952 --> 00:01:16,591
'D, Coronation Street.'
9
00:01:16,592 --> 00:01:18,991
'Coronation Street is
the right answer, well done.'
10
00:01:18,992 --> 00:01:21,351
Oh, bum.
Yeah, no, he's, erm...
11
00:01:21,352 --> 00:01:24,852
He's going to need
all the help he can get.
12
00:01:36,792 --> 00:01:38,752
This way, please.
13
00:01:39,912 --> 00:01:42,551
So this is just a little practice,
14
00:01:42,552 --> 00:01:44,591
before we send you off
to the canteen
15
00:01:44,592 --> 00:01:46,351
for a bite to eat, OK?
16
00:01:46,352 --> 00:01:48,511
Oh, and to warn, we're starting with
17
00:01:48,512 --> 00:01:51,431
a rollover contestant
from yesterday.
18
00:01:51,432 --> 00:01:52,991
So you won't be called upon
19
00:01:52,992 --> 00:01:55,391
until probably
quite a way into the show,
20
00:01:55,392 --> 00:01:59,631
just to, like, manage
your expectations and everything.
21
00:01:59,632 --> 00:02:00,912
Right!
22
00:02:00,952 --> 00:02:03,952
Just a rehearsal!
23
00:02:03,992 --> 00:02:05,391
Fingers on buttons.
24
00:02:05,392 --> 00:02:09,392
Put these Disney films
in order of their release.
25
00:02:10,112 --> 00:02:11,992
A, Little Mermaid.
26
00:02:12,032 --> 00:02:15,032
B, Snow White.
27
00:02:15,072 --> 00:02:16,632
C, Aladdin.
28
00:02:16,672 --> 00:02:17,712
D, Dumbo.
29
00:02:22,352 --> 00:02:26,712
OK, pretty straightforward,
B, D, A, C.
30
00:02:26,752 --> 00:02:28,951
Let's look who was fastest.
31
00:02:28,952 --> 00:02:32,992
Janet! On 6.52 seconds, well done.
32
00:02:33,032 --> 00:02:35,712
And, Charles?
Yeah.
33
00:02:35,752 --> 00:02:39,151
I'm afraid you were last.
Oh, well. It's just nice to be here.
34
00:02:39,152 --> 00:02:41,351
Yeah. Only rehearsal.
Yeah, OK.
35
00:02:41,352 --> 00:02:43,151
OK. Over to you, Rebecca.
Fantastic.
36
00:02:43,152 --> 00:02:46,902
OK, folks, if you'd
like to follow me, please.
37
00:02:50,112 --> 00:02:52,991
He's the husband
of the sister of the brother
38
00:02:52,992 --> 00:02:54,431
who were all here, so...
39
00:02:54,432 --> 00:02:55,671
Oh, Jesus Christ.
40
00:02:55,672 --> 00:02:58,111
But seriously, honestly,
I wouldn't worry,
41
00:02:58,112 --> 00:02:59,831
he's like
Tim-Nice-But-Dim army type,
42
00:02:59,832 --> 00:03:01,471
I doubt he'll even get in the chair.
43
00:03:01,472 --> 00:03:03,991
Terrible in rehearsal
and, so, yeah.
44
00:03:03,992 --> 00:03:06,591
Oh, and his wife did request
an extra ticket, though.
45
00:03:06,592 --> 00:03:09,111
Audience is full, but I could
put them in the overspill?
46
00:03:09,112 --> 00:03:10,552
Fine, wherever.
47
00:03:16,152 --> 00:03:17,631
Don't be so on edge.
48
00:03:17,632 --> 00:03:20,511
I'm gonna be the one in the chair,
hopefully.
49
00:03:20,512 --> 00:03:21,751
I wish you were more on edge,
50
00:03:21,752 --> 00:03:26,151
so I'd know you knew how
nerve-wracking it is out there.
51
00:03:26,152 --> 00:03:30,391
Well, at least we're
getting to spend more time together.
52
00:03:30,392 --> 00:03:32,392
KNOCK ON DOOR
53
00:03:40,912 --> 00:03:43,079
All right.
Of course, yeah.
54
00:03:49,472 --> 00:03:53,151
Right, place these words
of an Agatha Christie novel
55
00:03:53,152 --> 00:03:54,752
in the right order.
56
00:03:54,792 --> 00:03:56,912
Nile, On, Death, The!
57
00:04:01,112 --> 00:04:03,871
And it was, of course,
Death On The Nile.
58
00:04:03,872 --> 00:04:06,751
And who gets to
sit in the chair next?
59
00:04:06,752 --> 00:04:09,032
It's... Charles Ingram!
60
00:04:16,112 --> 00:04:17,351
Well done, Charles.
61
00:04:17,352 --> 00:04:19,071
Are you ready to play
for a million pounds?
62
00:04:19,072 --> 00:04:21,431
Is the Pope a Catholic?
And... hold there!
63
00:04:21,432 --> 00:04:23,391
What did I...?
Oh, don't worry, no, no, no.
64
00:04:23,392 --> 00:04:25,671
It's a lot less continuous
and magic than it is on tele.
65
00:04:25,672 --> 00:04:28,191
Erm, lots of stops and starts.
We're gonna mic your guest up now
66
00:04:28,192 --> 00:04:29,911
and put them
in their seat in the audience.
67
00:04:29,912 --> 00:04:31,911
Who have you brought?
Uh, my wife.
68
00:04:31,912 --> 00:04:34,391
You've met actually,
she played before. Oh, really?
69
00:04:34,392 --> 00:04:36,112
Yes.
Oh, yes!
70
00:04:37,632 --> 00:04:40,032
Hello... again.
71
00:04:40,072 --> 00:04:43,072
OK, folks, here we go. And...
72
00:04:45,232 --> 00:04:48,992
OK, let's play
Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?
73
00:04:49,032 --> 00:04:51,552
MUSIC AND APPLAUSE
74
00:04:57,672 --> 00:05:00,391
Erm, so, we've seen quite
a lot of the Major's family
75
00:05:00,392 --> 00:05:01,991
on this show, Charles...
76
00:05:01,992 --> 00:05:04,831
First off was his wife,
Diana, who won 32 grand.
77
00:05:04,832 --> 00:05:08,831
Erm, then brother-in-law Adrian,
who won 32 grand, as well.
78
00:05:08,832 --> 00:05:11,231
So it's a matter of
family honour, Charles.
79
00:05:11,232 --> 00:05:13,831
No pressure, then!
No. No. No, no pressure.
80
00:05:13,832 --> 00:05:16,391
What, are you trying to win
a million between you?
81
00:05:16,392 --> 00:05:19,752
LAUGHTER
First question of 15.
82
00:05:19,792 --> 00:05:22,231
"What name is given to a person
83
00:05:22,232 --> 00:05:25,831
"who is against increasing
the powers of the European Union?"
84
00:05:25,832 --> 00:05:28,792
Eurosceptic. Eurostar.
85
00:05:28,832 --> 00:05:31,712
Eurotrash. Eurovision.
86
00:05:31,752 --> 00:05:34,991
It's, erm...
It's Eurosceptic, Chris, yeah.
87
00:05:34,992 --> 00:05:36,992
That's correct.
88
00:05:38,432 --> 00:05:41,032
So for �2,000.
89
00:05:41,072 --> 00:05:43,271
Coronation Street...
CHRIS GUFFAWS
90
00:05:43,272 --> 00:05:45,671
I bet you know this one.
Oh, no, I've never watched it.
91
00:05:45,672 --> 00:05:47,511
Charles, it's been on for 40 years!
92
00:05:47,512 --> 00:05:50,192
I know, I know, I just...
93
00:05:50,232 --> 00:05:54,672
In Coronation Street,
who is Audrey's daughter?
94
00:05:54,712 --> 00:05:59,592
Janice, Gail, Linda, Sally.
95
00:06:01,672 --> 00:06:03,792
Erm, no, it's nothing...
96
00:06:03,832 --> 00:06:06,712
It's nothing, erm...
97
00:06:06,752 --> 00:06:08,836
I'm not getting anything.
98
00:06:15,872 --> 00:06:19,792
Erm, no, it's...
99
00:06:33,632 --> 00:06:35,392
Oh, sorry, sir,
100
00:06:35,432 --> 00:06:37,631
you can't be out here
on the phone, I'm afraid.
101
00:06:37,632 --> 00:06:38,512
Yeah, no, sorry, I'm...
102
00:06:38,552 --> 00:06:40,391
I know, I know, sorry,
I just need to, erm...
103
00:06:40,392 --> 00:06:42,631
Sir, if you don't mind?
Yeah, of course.
104
00:06:42,632 --> 00:06:46,132
Sorry. I was just trying to
get in touch...
105
00:06:46,952 --> 00:06:48,031
'OK, no, I... Yeah.
106
00:06:48,032 --> 00:06:50,231
'I'll have to ask the audience,
Chris.'
107
00:06:50,232 --> 00:06:52,231
Cut to Chris.
'OK, audience.'
108
00:06:52,232 --> 00:06:53,751
She's right. He's an idiot.
109
00:06:53,752 --> 00:06:55,502
'Fingers on keypads.'
110
00:06:57,112 --> 00:06:59,991
Which still begs the question
how he got in the goddamn chair,
111
00:06:59,992 --> 00:07:03,242
but hey-ho,
and all the fun of the fair.
112
00:07:05,112 --> 00:07:09,592
OK!
And 89% say Gail.
113
00:07:09,632 --> 00:07:14,299
Well. Gosh, yeah, OK...
Well, I'll go for B, go for Gail.
114
00:07:15,912 --> 00:07:18,912
Oh, "Where is the River Foyle"?
115
00:07:18,952 --> 00:07:21,112
Erm... Erm...
116
00:07:23,392 --> 00:07:25,671
I think I'm gonna have to, erm...
117
00:07:25,672 --> 00:07:28,311
Oh, dear. Yeah, I'm gonna have to...
phone a friend..
118
00:07:28,312 --> 00:07:30,991
It's all right, that's what
the lifelines are there for.
119
00:07:30,992 --> 00:07:33,151
OK, who are we gonna call, Major?
120
00:07:33,152 --> 00:07:36,912
Erm, Gerald.
OK, let's call Gerald, please.
121
00:07:36,952 --> 00:07:40,072
Where's Gerald?
Erm, South Wales.
122
00:07:40,112 --> 00:07:42,832
PHONE DIALS
123
00:07:42,872 --> 00:07:47,312
PHONE'S DIAL DISTORTS
124
00:07:54,112 --> 00:07:57,111
Mr Pollock, I mean it now,
we'll have to confiscate your phone.
125
00:07:57,112 --> 00:08:00,112
Yeah, all right. OK. OK. Yep, sorry.
126
00:08:02,352 --> 00:08:05,552
This way, sir.
Keep an eye on him.
127
00:08:05,592 --> 00:08:08,471
Is the right answer.
And that takes you to �4,000!
128
00:08:08,472 --> 00:08:10,952
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
129
00:08:10,992 --> 00:08:13,192
KLAXON BLARES
Oh, no!
130
00:08:13,232 --> 00:08:16,951
Oh, no! Charles, we're gonna have to
drag you back tomorrow,
131
00:08:16,952 --> 00:08:20,191
along with ten new
Fastest Finger First contestants.
132
00:08:20,192 --> 00:08:24,632
APPLAUSE
133
00:08:26,792 --> 00:08:28,431
Jacob Nixon from Frome!
134
00:08:28,432 --> 00:08:30,951
Charlotte Edmonds from Edinburgh.
135
00:08:30,952 --> 00:08:33,431
Helen McGrath form Broadstairs.
136
00:08:33,432 --> 00:08:35,552
Sorry, darling.
137
00:08:35,592 --> 00:08:37,551
Bloody Coronation Street.
138
00:08:37,552 --> 00:08:41,752
It's OK, we just need to
strategise for tomorrow.
139
00:08:41,792 --> 00:08:43,592
We need to regroup.
140
00:08:43,632 --> 00:08:44,951
Well, I can't be back tomorrow,
141
00:08:44,952 --> 00:08:46,951
I mean, I shouldn't really
be here today, so...
142
00:08:46,952 --> 00:08:49,311
KNOCK ON DOOR
Knock-knock, sorry to interrupt.
143
00:08:49,312 --> 00:08:51,591
Just giving you your hotel details.
144
00:08:51,592 --> 00:08:53,551
Oh, no, I'm really sorry,
but I actually think
145
00:08:53,552 --> 00:08:54,991
we have to get back home tonight.
146
00:08:54,992 --> 00:08:57,511
Back home? Yeah, I've got...
I've got work in the morning.
147
00:08:57,512 --> 00:09:00,431
But you're our rollover contestant.
You're back in the chair tomorrow.
148
00:09:00,432 --> 00:09:02,871
I know, I know,
but we didn't necessarily think
149
00:09:02,872 --> 00:09:05,311
that we would rollover, did we?
No. No.
150
00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:07,511
Well, can't you call in sick?
It's the British Army.
151
00:09:07,512 --> 00:09:09,311
No, you can't call in sick.
I know, but, like...
152
00:09:09,312 --> 00:09:12,646
SHE SCOFFS
..there's no war on, is there?
153
00:09:13,432 --> 00:09:15,351
I mean, I'm joking,
but I'm not really.
154
00:09:15,352 --> 00:09:16,591
We have to have you back here.
155
00:09:16,592 --> 00:09:18,231
We will be back.
I promise, I promise.
156
00:09:18,232 --> 00:09:21,151
But work takes precedence,
I'm so sorry.
157
00:09:21,152 --> 00:09:23,819
Charles, car, five minutes.
Yeah.
158
00:09:40,952 --> 00:09:44,952
PHONE RINGS
159
00:09:44,992 --> 00:09:46,711
Hello, Tecwen speaking.
160
00:09:46,712 --> 00:09:49,871
Ah, yes, Tecwen. Hi.
It's, erm, Diana Ingram here.
161
00:09:49,872 --> 00:09:53,351
Erm, Adrian's sister.
Oh. Hello, yes. Diana. Yes.
162
00:09:53,352 --> 00:09:55,631
Oh, my God, fortuitous timing.
You'll never guess what.
163
00:09:55,632 --> 00:09:57,151
Oh, I-I think I can, actually,
164
00:09:57,152 --> 00:09:59,711
you're going to be on the show
tomorrow, I've just heard,
165
00:09:59,712 --> 00:10:03,312
erm, weirdly, I'm here...
at the studio.
166
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,711
Charles, my husband, he's here,
167
00:10:04,712 --> 00:10:06,391
he's going to be
in the chair tomorrow,
168
00:10:06,392 --> 00:10:08,351
for when you're in
the Fastest Finger seats.
169
00:10:08,352 --> 00:10:11,671
Oh, my. What a coincidence.
I know. I know.
170
00:10:11,672 --> 00:10:15,756
So, erm, I just thought
I'd call for a quick chat.
171
00:10:16,312 --> 00:10:21,912
MUSIC AND APPLAUSE
172
00:10:21,952 --> 00:10:24,352
All right?
173
00:10:27,472 --> 00:10:29,352
MUSIC DIES
174
00:10:29,392 --> 00:10:34,752
CLOCK TICKS
175
00:10:34,792 --> 00:10:37,272
HE SIGHS
176
00:10:44,895 --> 00:10:47,094
We're welcoming back Charles,
177
00:10:47,095 --> 00:10:49,734
Major Charles Ingram,
into the chair.
178
00:10:49,735 --> 00:10:52,214
"Morning, Major!"
"Morning, Fawlty!"
179
00:10:52,215 --> 00:10:54,974
So do you have a strategy,
then, Major?
180
00:10:54,975 --> 00:10:57,814
Well, erm... Well, yeah, I do.
I do have a strategy, actually.
181
00:10:57,815 --> 00:11:00,494
I, erm... I was a bit defensive
on the last show,
182
00:11:00,495 --> 00:11:02,454
erm, you know,
talking myself out of answers
183
00:11:02,455 --> 00:11:05,014
that I... frankly,
I should have known and do know
184
00:11:05,015 --> 00:11:07,214
and, erm... So, yeah...
So I'm... I'm...
185
00:11:07,215 --> 00:11:09,414
Yeah, I'm, sort of,
going on the counterattack.
186
00:11:09,415 --> 00:11:11,854
We're going on a counterattack.
187
00:11:11,855 --> 00:11:13,054
Yeah, and basically I'm...
188
00:11:13,055 --> 00:11:15,414
I'm just gonna try and show
a bit more self-commitment.
189
00:11:15,415 --> 00:11:18,214
Well, erm, let's put this strategy
to the test.
190
00:11:18,215 --> 00:11:22,382
Right, Major Charles Ingram,
are you ready to play?
191
00:11:23,015 --> 00:11:26,535
THEME MUSIC PLAYS
192
00:11:26,575 --> 00:11:29,415
This, for �8,000.
193
00:11:29,455 --> 00:11:34,455
Who was the second husband
of Jacqueline Kennedy?
194
00:11:34,495 --> 00:11:36,895
Adnan Khashoggi.
195
00:11:36,935 --> 00:11:38,175
Ronald Reagan.
196
00:11:38,215 --> 00:11:41,135
Aristotle Onassis.
197
00:11:41,175 --> 00:11:43,055
Rupert Murdoch.
198
00:11:43,095 --> 00:11:45,454
All right, we're not expecting
this guy to be in long,
199
00:11:45,455 --> 00:11:46,814
he's two lifelines down,
200
00:11:46,815 --> 00:11:48,414
so make sure we're prepped
for the next.
201
00:11:48,415 --> 00:11:50,295
Roger, roger.
202
00:11:51,735 --> 00:11:53,374
I would have thought...
203
00:11:53,375 --> 00:11:57,542
I would have thought it would be
Aristotle Onassis.
204
00:11:58,335 --> 00:11:59,455
Erm...
205
00:12:01,615 --> 00:12:04,574
Yeah, one...
One of my sub-strategies is...
206
00:12:04,575 --> 00:12:06,894
Oh, my,
we've got sub-strategies now?!
207
00:12:06,895 --> 00:12:09,134
Yeah, yeah,
and sub-sub-strategies.
208
00:12:09,135 --> 00:12:11,734
But one of my sub-strategies
is to take my time
209
00:12:11,735 --> 00:12:15,152
and, erm, list all the...
all the options.
210
00:12:15,535 --> 00:12:16,535
So...
211
00:12:18,295 --> 00:12:20,615
Adnan Kashoggi.
212
00:12:20,655 --> 00:12:24,175
Ronald Reagan.
213
00:12:24,215 --> 00:12:28,375
And Rupert Murdoch.
214
00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:30,855
Aristotle Onassis.
215
00:12:30,895 --> 00:12:32,255
COUGHING
216
00:12:40,735 --> 00:12:42,735
Yeah, yeah, I think...
217
00:12:42,775 --> 00:12:46,414
I'm pretty sure
it's, erm, Aristotle Onassis.
218
00:12:46,415 --> 00:12:47,775
Final answer?
219
00:12:47,815 --> 00:12:49,399
Final answer, yeah.
220
00:12:50,215 --> 00:12:52,215
You didn't have to play.
221
00:12:54,535 --> 00:12:57,334
Well, this new
self-committed Charles
222
00:12:57,335 --> 00:13:01,502
is a wild and crazy man.
That's the correct answer!
223
00:13:08,455 --> 00:13:10,775
OK, so you've got �16,000.
224
00:13:10,815 --> 00:13:13,565
Now for the all-important 32,000.
225
00:13:14,855 --> 00:13:18,895
Who had a hit UK album
with Born To Do It,
226
00:13:18,935 --> 00:13:22,215
released in 2000?
227
00:13:22,255 --> 00:13:24,495
Coldplay.
228
00:13:24,535 --> 00:13:25,895
Toploader.
229
00:13:25,935 --> 00:13:28,135
A1.
230
00:13:28,175 --> 00:13:29,655
Craig David.
231
00:13:32,255 --> 00:13:34,375
Coldplay.
232
00:13:34,415 --> 00:13:36,215
Toploader.
233
00:13:36,255 --> 00:13:37,375
A1.
234
00:13:38,295 --> 00:13:40,095
Craig David.
235
00:13:46,335 --> 00:13:50,535
HE SIGHS
OK, well, erm...
236
00:13:51,815 --> 00:13:54,135
All right?
Yeah.
237
00:13:54,175 --> 00:13:59,342
That major from last night
is nearly up to 32 grand, amazingly.
238
00:13:59,375 --> 00:14:00,854
'I think it's A1.'
239
00:14:00,855 --> 00:14:02,454
He's like a new man today.
240
00:14:02,455 --> 00:14:04,734
'But it could be Toploader.'
241
00:14:04,735 --> 00:14:07,294
Which is also something to do with
a barrel on a rifle.
242
00:14:07,295 --> 00:14:11,735
So... Erm, I've never heard
of Craig David.
243
00:14:13,156 --> 00:14:15,735
Erm...
244
00:14:15,775 --> 00:14:17,974
Erm, I...
I'm afraid I'm gonna have to...
245
00:14:17,975 --> 00:14:20,854
I think I'm gonna have to use
my final lifeline, 50:50.
246
00:14:20,855 --> 00:14:23,614
Computer, take away
two wrong answers,
247
00:14:23,615 --> 00:14:28,094
leave Charles with the right answer
and one remaining wrong answer.
248
00:14:28,095 --> 00:14:31,429
Oh, that's not any easier...
Erm... Urgh.
249
00:14:37,655 --> 00:14:38,694
Do you know what?
250
00:14:38,695 --> 00:14:41,334
I think I'm gonna go for it,
I think I'm gonna go for A1.
251
00:14:41,335 --> 00:14:42,894
CROWD GASP
Final answer?
252
00:14:42,895 --> 00:14:44,135
No.
253
00:14:44,175 --> 00:14:46,335
LAUGHTER
254
00:14:49,415 --> 00:14:50,615
No. Erm...
255
00:14:55,175 --> 00:14:58,095
Craig David...
HE SIGHS
256
00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:04,855
Craig... David.
257
00:15:09,495 --> 00:15:11,735
SHE COUGHS
258
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,854
You know, when... When I'm at home,
erm, and I'm practising,
259
00:15:20,855 --> 00:15:22,854
you know, I guess... I guess...
260
00:15:22,855 --> 00:15:25,935
Well, I guess wrong 80% of the time,
261
00:15:25,975 --> 00:15:29,174
so I think I'm gonna
go with Craig David.
262
00:15:29,175 --> 00:15:31,375
LAUGHTER
263
00:15:31,415 --> 00:15:33,454
Charles, you'd never heard of him
a moment ago?!
264
00:15:33,455 --> 00:15:35,334
No, Craig David. I'm gonna...
265
00:15:35,335 --> 00:15:39,046
Final answer?
Yeah, final answer.
266
00:15:41,255 --> 00:15:45,055
Well, erm, what a show
this is turning into.
267
00:15:45,095 --> 00:15:47,974
Major Charles Ingram was on �16,000.
268
00:15:47,975 --> 00:15:49,894
He didn't have to play
this question.
269
00:15:49,895 --> 00:15:53,614
He said in his own words that
he'd never heard of Craig David.
270
00:15:53,615 --> 00:15:55,415
He went with A1.
271
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:58,695
And then, because...
272
00:15:58,735 --> 00:16:01,134
Well, I'd rather lost
the plot of his thinking then,
273
00:16:01,135 --> 00:16:02,534
but he changed his mind,
274
00:16:02,535 --> 00:16:07,694
knowing that he would lose �15,000
if he gave the wrong answer.
275
00:16:07,695 --> 00:16:10,614
He went with Craig David,
who he'd never heard of.
276
00:16:10,615 --> 00:16:11,695
Yep.
277
00:16:13,775 --> 00:16:15,574
And that's the right answer!
278
00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:18,054
THEME MUSIC PLAYS
Unbelievable.
279
00:16:18,055 --> 00:16:21,855
I don't know how you do that!
I really don't!
280
00:16:21,895 --> 00:16:24,015
Incredible.
281
00:16:25,375 --> 00:16:28,775
HE PANTS
282
00:16:28,815 --> 00:16:31,095
PHONE RINGS
283
00:16:32,135 --> 00:16:34,295
Yes?
Paul. It's David.
284
00:16:34,335 --> 00:16:37,414
It's happening,
I think the thing is happening.
285
00:16:37,415 --> 00:16:39,614
The rollover contestant
from last night,
286
00:16:39,615 --> 00:16:41,214
I think he's cheating.
287
00:16:41,215 --> 00:16:44,214
He...? What, in getting on the show?
288
00:16:44,215 --> 00:16:45,334
No, cheating on the show,
289
00:16:45,335 --> 00:16:47,934
cheating at the actual...
the actual game.
290
00:16:47,935 --> 00:16:50,535
Is the correct answer.
APPLAUSE
291
00:16:50,575 --> 00:16:52,494
How do you...?
You can't cheat the show,
292
00:16:52,495 --> 00:16:54,294
either you know the answer,
or you don't.
293
00:16:54,295 --> 00:16:57,212
Look something isn't right. He's...
294
00:16:58,935 --> 00:17:01,852
Normal people don't play like this.
295
00:17:02,175 --> 00:17:05,055
All right, I'm... I'm coming down.
296
00:17:07,135 --> 00:17:12,135
Yeah, I mean, it's a down payment
on a house, isn't it? So...
297
00:17:15,655 --> 00:17:17,935
So, yeah. Yeah. Holbein.
298
00:17:17,975 --> 00:17:19,055
Holbein.
299
00:17:19,095 --> 00:17:20,455
Final answer?
300
00:17:20,495 --> 00:17:22,095
Final answer.
301
00:17:23,535 --> 00:17:27,785
OK. Erm, first of all,
you thought it was Rembrandt.
302
00:17:28,975 --> 00:17:31,535
Said you'd seen the painting.
303
00:17:31,575 --> 00:17:34,242
You then thought it was Holbein.
304
00:17:40,135 --> 00:17:46,335
You've just won �125,000!
305
00:17:46,375 --> 00:17:48,516
Incredible.
306
00:17:48,556 --> 00:17:51,254
Incredible.
You're just getting better!
307
00:17:51,255 --> 00:17:53,495
OK, something's weird.
308
00:17:53,535 --> 00:17:56,414
How is he doing this?
Yeah, I have no idea.
309
00:17:56,415 --> 00:17:59,774
I mean, you were struggling more
at �200 than you are now.
310
00:17:59,775 --> 00:18:02,375
I-I dunno!
Unbelievable.
311
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,935
HE MOUTHS
312
00:18:03,975 --> 00:18:06,134
Well, Charles, here it is.
313
00:18:06,135 --> 00:18:09,734
A cheque, for a quarter of a...
It sounds strange doesn't it,
314
00:18:09,735 --> 00:18:12,814
..a quarter of a million pounds.
Gosh, you're shaking.
315
00:18:12,815 --> 00:18:14,014
I know, I know, I don't...
316
00:18:14,015 --> 00:18:16,574
I know that, frankly,
you didn't think you'd be able to
317
00:18:16,575 --> 00:18:18,774
equal your wife.
And, frankly, Charles, nor did I.
318
00:18:18,775 --> 00:18:22,535
LAUGHTER
Well, this is real money.
319
00:18:22,575 --> 00:18:25,975
�250,000.
320
00:18:26,015 --> 00:18:28,932
But we don't want to give you that!
321
00:18:29,375 --> 00:18:31,575
This question...
322
00:18:31,615 --> 00:18:33,855
for half a million pounds.
323
00:18:33,895 --> 00:18:35,775
THEME MUSIC PLAYS
324
00:18:38,415 --> 00:18:43,495
Baron Haussmann is best known
for the planning of which city?
325
00:18:45,135 --> 00:18:46,455
Rome.
326
00:18:46,495 --> 00:18:48,455
Paris.
327
00:18:48,495 --> 00:18:50,615
Berlin.
328
00:18:50,655 --> 00:18:51,815
Athens.
329
00:18:55,775 --> 00:18:58,735
Think it's Berlin.
LAUGHTER
330
00:18:58,775 --> 00:18:59,895
God!
331
00:19:05,575 --> 00:19:07,175
Yeah, Berlin.
332
00:19:07,215 --> 00:19:09,455
I mean, Haussmann...
333
00:19:09,495 --> 00:19:11,334
You know, seems...
Seems like a German name,
334
00:19:11,335 --> 00:19:12,934
rather than a Italian name,
335
00:19:12,935 --> 00:19:15,134
or a Parisian name,
or an Athens name.
336
00:19:15,135 --> 00:19:16,255
Erm...
337
00:19:20,295 --> 00:19:21,735
Rome.
338
00:19:23,095 --> 00:19:25,935
Paris.
COUGHING
339
00:19:30,775 --> 00:19:32,974
Yeah. Do you know,
I'm gonna, I'm gonna rethink it.
340
00:19:32,975 --> 00:19:35,894
Because I don't...
I don't think it's Athens
341
00:19:35,895 --> 00:19:38,294
and I'm pretty sure it's not Rome.
342
00:19:38,295 --> 00:19:39,774
And I would have thought...
343
00:19:39,775 --> 00:19:42,895
I would have thought it was, erm...
344
00:19:42,935 --> 00:19:45,214
Berlin, but there's a chance
it could be Paris.
345
00:19:45,215 --> 00:19:46,855
COUGHING
346
00:19:52,215 --> 00:19:54,215
Oh, God, no.
347
00:19:55,375 --> 00:19:59,975
You stand to lose �218,000.
348
00:20:03,415 --> 00:20:05,254
Yeah, I think...
I-I think it's Paris.
349
00:20:05,255 --> 00:20:07,175
I'm gonna play.
350
00:20:07,215 --> 00:20:10,549
Right, hang on.
Now, wait, where are we?!
351
00:20:11,815 --> 00:20:13,535
HE COUGHS
No, Paris.
352
00:20:13,575 --> 00:20:16,175
Paris, final answer.
353
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:18,655
Final answer?
Final answer.
354
00:20:22,415 --> 00:20:24,775
You thought it was Berlin.
355
00:20:24,815 --> 00:20:26,899
"Berlin, Berlin, Berlin".
356
00:20:30,375 --> 00:20:33,125
You changed your mind to Paris...
357
00:20:34,735 --> 00:20:37,819
That's brought you �500,000!
Yes! Yes!
358
00:20:39,695 --> 00:20:42,529
That's unbelievable! Unbelievable!
359
00:20:45,615 --> 00:20:47,574
Incredible.
Oh, shit, the glitter.
360
00:20:47,575 --> 00:20:49,814
Never thought we'd get to
the million-pound question,
361
00:20:49,815 --> 00:20:51,534
but we're at the
million-pound question,
362
00:20:51,535 --> 00:20:54,054
I never prepared the bloody glitter.
Where's the glitter man?
363
00:20:54,055 --> 00:20:59,495
? It's raining men, hallelujah
It's raining men, amen
364
00:20:59,535 --> 00:21:04,095
? It's raining men, hallelujah... ?
PHONE RINGS
365
00:21:04,135 --> 00:21:08,495
? Ame-e-e-e-en. ?
366
00:21:32,415 --> 00:21:34,255
Well, erm...
367
00:21:34,295 --> 00:21:37,054
It's not often I get to say this.
But...
368
00:21:37,055 --> 00:21:40,335
for �1 million:
369
00:21:40,375 --> 00:21:42,575
The number one,
370
00:21:42,615 --> 00:21:46,295
followed by 100 zeros
371
00:21:46,343 --> 00:21:49,225
is known by what name?
372
00:21:50,295 --> 00:21:52,095
Googol.
373
00:21:52,135 --> 00:21:54,655
Megatron.
374
00:21:54,695 --> 00:21:56,615
Gigabit.
375
00:21:56,655 --> 00:21:58,215
Nanomole.
376
00:22:05,295 --> 00:22:08,175
Well, let's see.
HE EXHALES
377
00:22:08,215 --> 00:22:12,215
Erm, Giga...
378
00:22:12,255 --> 00:22:13,855
Nano...
379
00:22:13,895 --> 00:22:15,645
Oh, God, don't start.
380
00:22:27,095 --> 00:22:29,015
HE STRAINS
381
00:22:30,575 --> 00:22:32,135
Right, OK.
382
00:22:34,975 --> 00:22:37,559
God, I don't... I don't, erm...
383
00:22:38,735 --> 00:22:42,775
Well?
Watch, just watch...
384
00:22:42,815 --> 00:22:44,935
I'm not sure.
385
00:22:44,975 --> 00:22:47,415
However...
LAUGHTER
386
00:22:47,455 --> 00:22:51,539
Charles, you haven't been sure
since question two!
387
00:22:55,215 --> 00:22:59,455
God, I... I think...
I think it's a Megatron.
388
00:23:05,095 --> 00:23:06,494
I have to say, I've...
389
00:23:06,495 --> 00:23:08,054
And I've never heard,
390
00:23:08,055 --> 00:23:09,894
I haven't...
No, I've never heard of a googol.
391
00:23:09,895 --> 00:23:14,295
HE PANTS
392
00:23:14,335 --> 00:23:17,855
Do you know the answer?
Yes, it's googol.
393
00:23:21,055 --> 00:23:22,889
That's what I thought.
394
00:23:26,495 --> 00:23:28,335
Googol.
COUGHING
395
00:23:29,455 --> 00:23:32,015
Googol.
COUGHING
396
00:23:34,255 --> 00:23:36,574
Yeah, I mean, you know,
by process of elimination,
397
00:23:36,575 --> 00:23:39,374
I actually think it is a googol.
But I don't know what a googol is.
398
00:23:39,375 --> 00:23:41,575
LAUGHTER
399
00:23:43,975 --> 00:23:46,174
It's not a gigabit,
a nanomole, or a Megatron
400
00:23:46,175 --> 00:23:48,974
and there's only four of them,
so it must be googol, mustn't it?
401
00:23:48,975 --> 00:23:50,215
I mean...
402
00:23:52,615 --> 00:23:55,735
HE LAUGHS
403
00:23:55,775 --> 00:23:58,654
I mean, I don't mind taking
the odd risk now and again.
404
00:23:58,655 --> 00:24:00,415
CROWD GROAN
405
00:24:02,135 --> 00:24:05,215
My strategy has...
has worked so far.
406
00:24:11,935 --> 00:24:14,134
Chris, I'm gonna play.
CROWD GASP
407
00:24:14,135 --> 00:24:16,414
You know, you don't have to
play this, Charles.
408
00:24:16,415 --> 00:24:18,774
No-one would blame you
if you walked away right now,
409
00:24:18,775 --> 00:24:21,025
with half a million pounds.
410
00:24:27,375 --> 00:24:29,015
Googol.
411
00:24:29,055 --> 00:24:30,775
Final answer?
412
00:24:30,815 --> 00:24:33,015
Final answer.
413
00:24:33,055 --> 00:24:35,889
Catch me when I fall on the floor.
414
00:24:40,375 --> 00:24:41,894
Don't go to a break.
415
00:24:41,895 --> 00:24:45,174
Please, don't go to...
Please, don't go for a break.
416
00:24:45,175 --> 00:24:47,374
We're taking a break.
Oh, God!
417
00:24:47,375 --> 00:24:49,255
CROWD GROAN
418
00:24:49,295 --> 00:24:52,254
Don't go anywhere, I know you won't,
419
00:24:52,255 --> 00:24:56,054
on what is an epic night
in British television.
420
00:24:56,055 --> 00:24:58,655
THEME MUSIC PLAYS
421
00:25:03,335 --> 00:25:04,815
Oh, my God.
422
00:25:09,095 --> 00:25:11,614
We should stop it now.
Just stop it.
423
00:25:11,615 --> 00:25:14,774
We can't stop it, we have no proof.
We just, I don't know, just...
424
00:25:14,775 --> 00:25:18,174
HE SIGHS
We have to carry on.
425
00:25:19,095 --> 00:25:21,854
You all right?
Erm, yeah, I just, erm...
426
00:25:21,855 --> 00:25:23,894
I mean, no, not really.
HE CHUCKLES
427
00:25:23,895 --> 00:25:25,375
No!
428
00:25:25,415 --> 00:25:28,574
So you can see, can you, if I've got
the answer right on your screen?
429
00:25:28,575 --> 00:25:29,575
I can.
430
00:25:31,055 --> 00:25:34,055
I'm sure it'll just be
a few seconds.
431
00:25:41,615 --> 00:25:42,855
Thank you.
432
00:25:45,095 --> 00:25:46,175
HE MOUTHS
433
00:25:52,695 --> 00:25:55,615
OK, studio, and...
434
00:25:55,655 --> 00:25:57,895
THEME MUSIC PLAYS
435
00:26:00,135 --> 00:26:01,495
Welcome back.
436
00:26:01,535 --> 00:26:04,774
Wow. Erm, we are here
with Charles Ingram.
437
00:26:04,775 --> 00:26:08,975
Who, after first thinking
it was Megatron,
438
00:26:09,015 --> 00:26:13,055
erm, then played googol
as his final answer.
439
00:26:13,095 --> 00:26:16,012
Even though he'd never heard of it.
440
00:26:21,855 --> 00:26:23,335
Charles?
441
00:26:27,215 --> 00:26:32,255
You've just won �1 million!
442
00:26:32,295 --> 00:26:35,732
One million!
443
00:26:36,575 --> 00:26:42,415
You are the most amazing player
we have ever, ever had!
444
00:26:42,455 --> 00:26:46,215
Diana? Come on down,
my darling, come on.
445
00:26:46,255 --> 00:26:48,575
One million!
446
00:26:48,615 --> 00:26:51,495
�1 million!
447
00:26:51,535 --> 00:26:54,495
I can't believe it.
CHEERING
448
00:26:55,735 --> 00:26:59,535
SHE SOBS
449
00:26:59,575 --> 00:27:03,175
The best player we have ever had!
450
00:27:03,215 --> 00:27:04,495
What a man!
451
00:27:04,535 --> 00:27:06,775
Quite an amazing man.
452
00:27:06,815 --> 00:27:10,655
I have no idea how you did it.
453
00:27:10,695 --> 00:27:13,934
I don't know.
Unbelievable! Unbelievable!
454
00:27:13,935 --> 00:27:16,534
Unbelievable, Diana, my darling,
come here.
455
00:27:16,535 --> 00:27:20,015
Ladies and gentlemen,
Charles Ingram.
456
00:27:20,055 --> 00:27:24,215
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
457
00:27:30,424 --> 00:27:33,223
? Right from
Her doorway we roam... ?
458
00:27:33,224 --> 00:27:34,824
THEY LAUGH
459
00:27:34,864 --> 00:27:38,344
? Eats and then
It's a pleasure again
460
00:27:38,384 --> 00:27:39,983
? Walkin' my baby... ?
461
00:27:39,984 --> 00:27:45,304
"Charles Ingram. One million."
462
00:27:45,344 --> 00:27:47,304
? I don't mean maybe
463
00:27:47,344 --> 00:27:51,024
? Walkin' my baby
464
00:27:51,064 --> 00:27:56,664
? Back home. ?
465
00:27:56,704 --> 00:27:59,384
THEY LAUGH
466
00:28:00,904 --> 00:28:03,063
What? What am I listening for?
467
00:28:03,064 --> 00:28:05,024
Just wait. It, erm...
468
00:28:05,064 --> 00:28:09,384
I don't know, I don't know,
just... play VT.
469
00:28:11,344 --> 00:28:15,584
'Googol.'
COUGHING
470
00:28:15,624 --> 00:28:17,744
That, there. Right there.
471
00:28:17,784 --> 00:28:19,464
A cough.
So what?
472
00:28:19,504 --> 00:28:21,183
There's always coughing.
473
00:28:21,184 --> 00:28:22,903
I think... I don't definitely know,
474
00:28:22,904 --> 00:28:24,743
but I think there's,
like, a pattern.
475
00:28:24,744 --> 00:28:26,423
Of what, coughing? From who?
476
00:28:26,424 --> 00:28:28,143
Look, there's gotta
be something, Paul.
477
00:28:28,144 --> 00:28:30,063
Watch last night's tape,
he's useless.
478
00:28:30,064 --> 00:28:32,263
And then, what,
he comes back an utter genius?
479
00:28:32,264 --> 00:28:34,384
Replay VT.
480
00:28:34,424 --> 00:28:36,824
'Googol.'
COUGHING
481
00:28:36,864 --> 00:28:37,864
Turn it up.
482
00:28:37,904 --> 00:28:39,464
'Googol.'
COUGHING
483
00:28:39,504 --> 00:28:40,663
Then he changes his answer.
484
00:28:40,664 --> 00:28:43,663
'By process of elimination,
I actually think it is a googol.
485
00:28:43,664 --> 00:28:46,998
'But I just don't know
what a googol is.'
486
00:28:50,704 --> 00:28:53,464
PHONE RINGS
Hi, Paul?
487
00:28:53,504 --> 00:28:54,864
'Um, hi, Ruth.'
488
00:28:54,904 --> 00:28:57,423
Erm, we've had another millionaire.
489
00:28:57,424 --> 00:28:59,544
Oh. OK, great!
490
00:28:59,584 --> 00:29:02,544
Except...
491
00:29:02,584 --> 00:29:05,343
I think that...
Erm, WE think something's not right.
492
00:29:05,344 --> 00:29:07,583
We think the guy may have cheated.
493
00:29:07,584 --> 00:29:11,024
PHONE RINGS
494
00:29:11,064 --> 00:29:12,224
Hello?
495
00:29:12,264 --> 00:29:14,063
What the shitting hell?
496
00:29:14,064 --> 00:29:17,144
BABY GARBLES
497
00:29:39,304 --> 00:29:40,743
Cheeky bastards, who are they?
498
00:29:40,744 --> 00:29:41,823
Are they one of that group
499
00:29:41,824 --> 00:29:43,823
you talked about
getting on the show? Morning.
500
00:29:43,824 --> 00:29:46,063
We don't know,
we just know he's a wrong'un.
501
00:29:46,064 --> 00:29:47,704
Are you OK?
502
00:29:47,744 --> 00:29:50,828
No, I'm not OK,
of course, I'm not OK.
503
00:29:51,024 --> 00:29:52,903
Sorry, sorry,
it's murder on the old...
504
00:29:52,904 --> 00:29:55,103
This is Lionel, from legal.
Coffee? How do you take it?
505
00:29:55,104 --> 00:29:56,583
Oh, just, erm, massive.
506
00:29:56,584 --> 00:29:59,664
Look, before anything else,
507
00:29:59,704 --> 00:30:02,823
the most urgent thing is
whether to air tomorrow's episode,
508
00:30:02,824 --> 00:30:04,743
because if we don't,
then ten million people
509
00:30:04,744 --> 00:30:06,463
are gonna need
something else to watch.
510
00:30:06,464 --> 00:30:08,503
I have a tape on its way,
you can see for yourself.
511
00:30:08,504 --> 00:30:10,543
Well, what about the police?
The police?
512
00:30:10,544 --> 00:30:12,783
Yeah.
Is...? Is this a police...?
513
00:30:12,784 --> 00:30:16,543
Well, it's not... not.
It's theft. It's �1 million.
514
00:30:16,544 --> 00:30:19,663
If this was a bank vault
or a diamond store in Hatton Gardens
515
00:30:19,664 --> 00:30:21,623
there'd be helicopters by now,
roadblocks.
516
00:30:21,624 --> 00:30:24,703
Come in...
Ah, right, see for yourself.
517
00:30:24,704 --> 00:30:27,543
All I'm saying is, is it a crime
to cheat on a game show?
518
00:30:27,544 --> 00:30:31,423
Well, it's... It's... Well...
Stop saying "well", Lionel.
519
00:30:31,424 --> 00:30:33,623
I'm from legal.
It's my job to say "well".
520
00:30:33,624 --> 00:30:34,744
SHE SNEEZES
521
00:30:38,464 --> 00:30:40,663
See for yourselves.
'Do you know what?
522
00:30:40,664 --> 00:30:44,903
'I think I am going to go for it.
I'm gonna go for A1.'
523
00:30:44,904 --> 00:30:46,864
'Final answer?
No.'
524
00:30:46,904 --> 00:30:48,584
LAUGHTER
525
00:30:50,064 --> 00:30:54,344
'No. Erm... A1.
526
00:30:54,384 --> 00:30:57,664
'Craig... David.'
527
00:30:57,704 --> 00:30:59,984
COUGHING
528
00:31:00,024 --> 00:31:02,704
Oh, Jesus, Je-sus.
529
00:31:02,744 --> 00:31:03,783
It's so obvious.
530
00:31:03,784 --> 00:31:07,663
And don't forget that his wife
has already been on the show.
531
00:31:07,664 --> 00:31:08,943
She knows the ins and outs.
532
00:31:08,944 --> 00:31:10,943
'I normally guess wrong
80% of the time...'
533
00:31:10,944 --> 00:31:13,263
Watch now. He changes his answer.
534
00:31:13,264 --> 00:31:16,183
'I think I'm going to
go with Craig David.'
535
00:31:16,184 --> 00:31:19,544
OK, I say we don't air.
Agreed.
536
00:31:19,584 --> 00:31:21,823
We can edit forward to
the next contestant in the chair.
537
00:31:21,824 --> 00:31:24,408
Would you fast forward, please?
538
00:31:25,624 --> 00:31:28,458
Can we do that, is it that simple?
539
00:31:29,784 --> 00:31:32,623
Oh, arse, the glitter on the floor.
540
00:31:32,624 --> 00:31:33,823
Well, if no-one has won,
541
00:31:33,824 --> 00:31:36,183
where did the glitter
just come from? No-one will notice.
542
00:31:36,184 --> 00:31:37,184
Or care.
543
00:31:37,224 --> 00:31:40,343
This is Tecwen Whittock,
from Whitchurch, Cardiff.
544
00:31:40,344 --> 00:31:42,903
Can you stretch out his turn,
make him longer?
545
00:31:42,904 --> 00:31:44,624
It'll be a struggle.
546
00:31:44,664 --> 00:31:47,748
He was erm, nothing special,
you know.
547
00:31:48,704 --> 00:31:50,824
KNOCK ON DOOR
548
00:31:50,864 --> 00:31:53,114
Did you order something?
No.
549
00:31:58,304 --> 00:31:59,663
Oh.
Hello, hello, David Briggs.
550
00:31:59,664 --> 00:32:01,703
Ah, yes, hello, hello.
Hello, this is Ruth Settle.
551
00:32:01,704 --> 00:32:04,223
Hi. Hi, hello. Morning, morning.
Oh, hello.
552
00:32:04,224 --> 00:32:06,384
Oh, hi.
Sleep OK?
553
00:32:06,424 --> 00:32:09,104
If at all, you must be...
554
00:32:09,144 --> 00:32:11,943
Erm... Oh, what's this about?
Oh, it's only to, erm...
555
00:32:11,944 --> 00:32:14,343
It's just to work out
the next few days.
556
00:32:14,344 --> 00:32:15,783
The angle, the coverage.
557
00:32:15,784 --> 00:32:16,943
So your press conference,
558
00:32:16,944 --> 00:32:20,183
we thought, because of question 12
for 125,000,
559
00:32:20,184 --> 00:32:23,934
The Ambassadors is a painting
by which artist?
560
00:32:25,904 --> 00:32:30,463
The... What, the Holbein?
The Holbein. Well done, correct!
561
00:32:30,464 --> 00:32:36,103
We are thinking of hosting it there,
in front of the painting. Ah, right.
562
00:32:36,104 --> 00:32:37,344
But you...
563
00:32:37,384 --> 00:32:39,863
You did keep changing your mind
a lot, didn't you?
564
00:32:39,864 --> 00:32:43,103
Well, actually, that was to
explain my thinking to the audience,
565
00:32:43,104 --> 00:32:46,503
so I wasn't just, you know,
sat there like a muppet.
566
00:32:46,504 --> 00:32:49,903
It's, erm, probably just that,
don't you think?
567
00:32:49,904 --> 00:32:51,821
What's "probably" what?
568
00:32:52,544 --> 00:32:56,223
Actually, erm, Diana mentions
all these tips in her book
569
00:32:56,224 --> 00:32:58,863
that she's writing with her brother
about the show.
570
00:32:58,864 --> 00:33:01,663
What? It'll help publicise it,
won't it? Being a winner.
571
00:33:01,664 --> 00:33:04,223
You're writing a book?
Oh, just a little stocking filler.
572
00:33:04,224 --> 00:33:06,703
With hints and things
about how to get onto the show,
573
00:33:06,704 --> 00:33:08,743
how to play, just a few things
that we've picked up
574
00:33:08,744 --> 00:33:10,703
from this community of fans,
that's all.
575
00:33:10,704 --> 00:33:13,954
Gosh, that...
That sound really helpful.
576
00:33:13,984 --> 00:33:16,183
I wouldn't mention that
to the press yet. No.
577
00:33:16,184 --> 00:33:18,383
We'll... We'll have an embargo
until the show airs.
578
00:33:18,384 --> 00:33:21,884
We have to handle everything...
delicately.
579
00:33:23,584 --> 00:33:26,384
Guilty as sin.
THEY GRUMBLE
580
00:33:26,424 --> 00:33:30,103
Bollocks. Look,
they are quiz obsessive, they're...
581
00:33:30,104 --> 00:33:32,583
They are fans of the show,
so they're a bit much,
582
00:33:32,584 --> 00:33:33,943
but apart from that.
583
00:33:33,944 --> 00:33:36,778
Watch the tape. Play her the tape.
584
00:33:38,104 --> 00:33:42,144
Oh, and she's, erm,
writing a book, the wife,
585
00:33:42,184 --> 00:33:45,383
like, erm, an expose of the show.
She what?!
586
00:33:45,384 --> 00:33:48,223
Oh, my God... It's just a tiny,
little stocking filler.
587
00:33:48,224 --> 00:33:51,263
Look, I just come off the phone
from some of our guys at the studio
588
00:33:51,264 --> 00:33:53,623
who are investigating all possible,
you know, and...
589
00:33:53,624 --> 00:33:56,543
And they have gone into the car park
with some sort of radio receiver
590
00:33:56,544 --> 00:33:58,703
and they're saying it's possible
591
00:33:58,704 --> 00:34:01,903
to listen in to the show relay
from outside?
592
00:34:01,904 --> 00:34:04,143
David, do we not
scramble that signal?
593
00:34:04,144 --> 00:34:06,543
Why would we scramble the signal?
594
00:34:06,544 --> 00:34:09,463
How do you scramble a signal?
What's this now? The relay?
595
00:34:09,464 --> 00:34:12,303
I'm just saying that
hypothetically, someone,
596
00:34:12,304 --> 00:34:14,823
maybe someone from this...
this... this group
597
00:34:14,824 --> 00:34:17,623
could listen in to the show
from outside.
598
00:34:17,624 --> 00:34:20,823
And how would that help them?
To hear the questions!
599
00:34:20,824 --> 00:34:23,263
Look up the answers
and communicate back in.
600
00:34:23,264 --> 00:34:25,543
To who? The person in the chair?!
Maybe! I don't know!
601
00:34:25,544 --> 00:34:27,943
Or someone in the audience,
with a mobile phone.
602
00:34:27,944 --> 00:34:29,703
We don't allow mobile phones
in the studio.
603
00:34:29,704 --> 00:34:32,871
Yeah, but do we check?
Course we check.
604
00:34:33,584 --> 00:34:35,464
Do we check?
605
00:34:35,504 --> 00:34:38,183
No. Course we don't check,
how would we check?
606
00:34:38,184 --> 00:34:40,063
You don't search the audience?
607
00:34:40,064 --> 00:34:42,783
Let's get it all out now, shall we?
After the horse has bolted.
608
00:34:42,784 --> 00:34:45,543
This is all just happening
this morning.
609
00:34:45,544 --> 00:34:47,463
Right, it's a game show!
It's not Fort Knox!
610
00:34:47,464 --> 00:34:50,863
Whoa, wait, are we saying that
it's not someone coughing, then?
611
00:34:50,864 --> 00:34:53,623
It could be the coughing.
It's definitely the coughing.
612
00:34:53,624 --> 00:34:55,783
Either way, I'm calling the police.
613
00:34:55,784 --> 00:34:58,143
Who would you even call?
Like, which, like, branch?
614
00:34:58,144 --> 00:34:59,823
I'll text my person
to look up for IP.
615
00:34:59,824 --> 00:35:01,863
Hold on, have they have even
cashed the cheque yet?
616
00:35:01,864 --> 00:35:03,703
Wait, have...?
Have we cancelled the cheque?
617
00:35:03,704 --> 00:35:05,704
I don't know. I mean...
618
00:35:05,744 --> 00:35:07,663
I mean, no, we haven't
cancelled the cheque,
619
00:35:07,664 --> 00:35:10,463
I've been at the...
Lionel. Should we cancel the cheque?
620
00:35:10,464 --> 00:35:13,183
I'm just thinking, we might need
to wait for them to cash the cheque
621
00:35:13,184 --> 00:35:15,183
for it to be stealing.
No, no, no, if we do that,
622
00:35:15,184 --> 00:35:17,383
that would be entrapment,
surely, by us?
623
00:35:17,384 --> 00:35:18,783
Yeah, but if they cash the cheque,
624
00:35:18,784 --> 00:35:20,383
do we have to sue them
to get it back?
625
00:35:20,384 --> 00:35:22,943
Am I cancelling the cheque,
or aren't I?! Well...
626
00:35:22,944 --> 00:35:26,743
No, I just don't see it.
Don't you hear it?! The coughing.
627
00:35:26,744 --> 00:35:29,583
Is that how loud it actually was?
Yes.
628
00:35:29,584 --> 00:35:32,383
Well... No, we've isolated them
a bit, for you to hear...
629
00:35:32,384 --> 00:35:35,143
Listen, you can hear the coughs
at the right answers.
630
00:35:35,144 --> 00:35:37,663
Yeah, and I can hear the coughs
on the wrong answers!
631
00:35:37,664 --> 00:35:39,863
Here. These are the people
at Scotland Yard to call,
632
00:35:39,864 --> 00:35:42,543
it's something called the
Celebrity Crimes Squad or something,
633
00:35:42,544 --> 00:35:45,183
I don't know. Really?
Sounds like a shit detective show.
634
00:35:45,184 --> 00:35:47,183
Yeah, sounds like
something we'd make. Wow.
635
00:35:47,184 --> 00:35:49,743
Wait, I'm confused,
what are we saying to them?
636
00:35:49,744 --> 00:35:51,303
That this is... There's more people?
637
00:35:51,304 --> 00:35:53,543
That this is part
of a bigger... conspiracy?
638
00:35:53,544 --> 00:35:54,823
All I'm saying is we don't know
639
00:35:54,824 --> 00:35:56,583
how many people
were outside helping,
640
00:35:56,584 --> 00:35:57,623
inside, helping him.
641
00:35:57,624 --> 00:36:00,303
Yeah, but you can't pack the place
out with people that you know.
642
00:36:00,304 --> 00:36:02,638
You only get the one ticket.
643
00:36:03,384 --> 00:36:04,384
Actually...
644
00:36:06,784 --> 00:36:08,823
Actually, on the first night,
645
00:36:08,824 --> 00:36:11,783
the Ingram's did have
someone else there.
646
00:36:11,784 --> 00:36:13,384
Diana's brother.
647
00:36:14,584 --> 00:36:16,783
The brother... was there...?
648
00:36:16,784 --> 00:36:18,944
Yeah.
God dammit!
649
00:36:21,344 --> 00:36:23,261
I'm calling the police.
650
00:36:24,344 --> 00:36:25,904
'What a man!'
651
00:36:25,944 --> 00:36:29,023
'A major disaster is occurring
in New York City this afternoon.'
652
00:36:29,024 --> 00:36:31,264
Wait a sec...
653
00:36:31,304 --> 00:36:32,864
what is that?
654
00:36:32,904 --> 00:36:34,223
'World Trade Centre is on fire.
655
00:36:34,224 --> 00:36:38,623
'Early indications are
that a Boeing 747 out of Boston
656
00:36:38,624 --> 00:36:43,263
'collided with the tower at 1:46 PM
this afternoon, 8:46 AM CET.'
657
00:36:43,264 --> 00:36:45,984
Is that live?
It must be..
658
00:36:46,024 --> 00:36:48,903
'Eye witness reports are coming in
that the plane banked sharply
659
00:36:48,904 --> 00:36:52,223
'and made a direct hit at around
the 80th floor of the building.
660
00:36:52,224 --> 00:36:55,543
'More as we have it.
Thank you, Nicholas.
661
00:36:55,544 --> 00:36:58,743
'As you can imagine, there is chaos
in the streets of downtown New York.
662
00:36:58,744 --> 00:37:01,223
'All major buildings are being
evacuated in the area
663
00:37:01,224 --> 00:37:03,743
'surrounding the World Trade Centre.
664
00:37:03,744 --> 00:37:07,823
'There's been a second collision,
possibly another plane goes...'
665
00:37:07,824 --> 00:37:10,864
Are you OK? Just awful.
666
00:37:12,864 --> 00:37:16,531
Yeah. Puts it all in perspective,
doesn't it?
667
00:37:16,544 --> 00:37:20,503
I haven't even told the chaps about
our win yet, all seems a bit...
668
00:37:20,504 --> 00:37:22,703
Actually there was a message
for you from Celador
669
00:37:22,704 --> 00:37:25,703
when I got back from school.
I don't know if you... Right.
670
00:37:25,704 --> 00:37:27,984
OK, well, life goes on, eh?
671
00:37:29,224 --> 00:37:31,424
Yeah.
672
00:37:31,464 --> 00:37:33,944
I love you.
I love you.
673
00:37:33,984 --> 00:37:35,744
Give me that number.
674
00:37:37,504 --> 00:37:40,343
Detective Sergeant Sam Ferguson
from the Special Inquiry Unit,
675
00:37:40,344 --> 00:37:43,543
this is my colleague,
Detective Constable Amir Cave.
676
00:37:43,544 --> 00:37:44,864
You rang.
677
00:37:44,904 --> 00:37:47,223
Well, I don't think any of us
expected you to come today,
678
00:37:47,224 --> 00:37:50,024
given the, erm...
Yeah.
679
00:37:50,064 --> 00:37:52,344
Terrible thing. But...
680
00:37:52,384 --> 00:37:54,143
crimes still need solving.
681
00:37:54,144 --> 00:37:57,263
So, we've been brought up
to speed by Mr...
682
00:37:57,264 --> 00:38:00,681
PHONE RINGS
Oh, excuse me. This'll be him.
683
00:38:05,544 --> 00:38:08,224
Hello, Paul Smith?
Paul, hello.
684
00:38:08,264 --> 00:38:11,103
It's Charles Ingram here,
I was just on your show.
685
00:38:11,104 --> 00:38:13,263
Charles, thank you for calling back.
686
00:38:13,264 --> 00:38:15,681
Erm, so I have to tell you...
687
00:38:15,704 --> 00:38:19,783
that we have suspicions from viewing
the recording of Monday's programme
688
00:38:19,784 --> 00:38:23,183
and subsequently studying
the tapes carefully,
689
00:38:23,184 --> 00:38:26,423
that there were irregularities
during the taping of the show
690
00:38:26,424 --> 00:38:30,224
in which you participated.
Oh, Good Lord, no.
691
00:38:30,264 --> 00:38:32,623
Because of that I have to tell
you that these suspicions...
692
00:38:32,624 --> 00:38:36,458
THEY MUTTER
..have been referred to the police.
693
00:38:36,824 --> 00:38:40,223
Right. And thus we will not,
for the moment,
694
00:38:40,224 --> 00:38:45,863
be airing the programme, or indeed
authorising payment of the cheque.
695
00:38:45,864 --> 00:38:46,864
Right.
696
00:38:48,304 --> 00:38:50,888
Yeah. Well, I mean, you know...
697
00:38:52,384 --> 00:38:56,424
...I completely refute that,
obviously.
698
00:38:56,464 --> 00:38:59,024
All right.
699
00:38:59,064 --> 00:39:00,144
Good Lord.
700
00:39:03,584 --> 00:39:06,624
Well, goodbye.
Goodbye.
701
00:39:21,589 --> 00:39:26,629
Police? You're an army major.
I'm a teaching assistant.
702
00:39:26,669 --> 00:39:29,348
People like us don't deal with
the police, this is Wiltshire.
703
00:39:29,349 --> 00:39:31,469
It's what he said.
704
00:39:31,509 --> 00:39:35,709
I sort of... told our book publisher
about your win
705
00:39:35,749 --> 00:39:38,028
and they've set up this
photo and interview thing
706
00:39:38,029 --> 00:39:40,708
for this Sunday. I know
the Millionaire people said not to,
707
00:39:40,709 --> 00:39:42,908
but the publishers
said it was too good not to.
708
00:39:42,909 --> 00:39:46,268
For the book... Well, there won't
be a book, will there, if...?
709
00:39:46,269 --> 00:39:48,828
I bet it wasn't the publishers
who said that, I bet it was Adrian.
710
00:39:48,829 --> 00:39:51,948
I bet you've been speaking to him.
Have you spoken to Adrian again?
711
00:39:51,949 --> 00:39:54,828
How? If he's on the run? On the run!
712
00:39:54,829 --> 00:39:57,108
As if that's a normal sentence
for a normal person to say!
713
00:39:57,109 --> 00:40:00,388
I'm a commissioned officer in the
British Army. There are standards.
714
00:40:00,389 --> 00:40:02,588
DOG WHINES
Come along, Buffy.
715
00:40:02,589 --> 00:40:04,988
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
How do we know that it was Celador?
716
00:40:04,989 --> 00:40:06,548
That it was Paul Smith you spoke to?
717
00:40:06,549 --> 00:40:08,948
It was, I returned his call,
on the number they left you...
718
00:40:08,949 --> 00:40:11,228
Yes, I know,
but how do we know it's not a hoax.
719
00:40:11,229 --> 00:40:13,188
Someone in the community,
taking the mickey.
720
00:40:13,189 --> 00:40:15,908
What...? Maybe that's what they do
to everyone, everyone who wins.
721
00:40:15,909 --> 00:40:18,108
It's not a mickey-take, Diana.
722
00:40:18,109 --> 00:40:21,359
Well, it's a bit over the top,
isn't it?
723
00:40:22,189 --> 00:40:24,508
Call it back again, that number.
No. I'm not gonna call it.
724
00:40:24,509 --> 00:40:26,388
I want to hear it.
No, I'm not gonna call it back.
725
00:40:26,389 --> 00:40:28,549
Then I'll do it.
Diana!
726
00:40:29,669 --> 00:40:32,789
Hello. Erm, this is... Diana Ingram.
727
00:40:35,749 --> 00:40:38,708
Hello. Hi, erm, yes,
we received a phone call
728
00:40:38,709 --> 00:40:41,748
from this number earlier
and, well, it occurred to us
729
00:40:41,749 --> 00:40:44,348
that we didn't know
whether it was real, or not.
730
00:40:44,349 --> 00:40:45,949
No, erm, no.
731
00:40:45,989 --> 00:40:47,828
No, I'm afraid it was real.
732
00:40:47,829 --> 00:40:50,269
This... This is Paul Smith.
733
00:40:50,309 --> 00:40:52,549
Yes, but how do we know?
734
00:40:52,589 --> 00:40:54,188
It could be a wind-up. Or the press.
735
00:40:54,189 --> 00:40:56,029
Erm...
736
00:40:56,069 --> 00:40:57,189
Well...
737
00:40:57,229 --> 00:40:58,469
Erm... O-OK.
738
00:40:58,509 --> 00:41:01,343
Erm, why don't you call back again
739
00:41:01,349 --> 00:41:03,766
and I won't answer this time,
740
00:41:03,789 --> 00:41:07,748
it'll take you through to my
extension answering machine message.
741
00:41:07,749 --> 00:41:11,708
And you'll hear that this is me,
and... and this is Celador.
742
00:41:11,709 --> 00:41:15,629
And that... that this is no wind-up,
Mrs Ingram.
743
00:41:15,669 --> 00:41:16,669
OK.
744
00:41:26,509 --> 00:41:31,349
PHONE DIALS
745
00:41:33,309 --> 00:41:35,748
'Hello, you've reached
Paul Smith at Celador.
746
00:41:35,749 --> 00:41:39,628
'Leave a message and I'll get
back to you when I can, thanks.'
747
00:41:39,629 --> 00:41:41,629
MESSAGE TONE BEEPS
748
00:41:47,589 --> 00:41:50,069
HE CLEARS THROAT
749
00:41:50,109 --> 00:41:51,988
We're doing that press interview.
750
00:41:51,989 --> 00:41:56,323
You won that money. It's yours.
So let's tell people.
751
00:42:10,029 --> 00:42:13,588
We'll need to make a statement.
They're cheats!
752
00:42:13,589 --> 00:42:16,423
I just can't get my head round it.
753
00:42:16,429 --> 00:42:21,179
That terribly nice major,
a criminal mastermind? Bollocks.
754
00:42:21,669 --> 00:42:23,868
You really didn't notice anything?
755
00:42:23,869 --> 00:42:26,348
Well I-I suppose
you've a lot going on.
756
00:42:26,349 --> 00:42:28,548
Yeah, but I'd hope
that I'd have done this enough
757
00:42:28,549 --> 00:42:30,588
to notice if someone
is trying to steal a million quid
758
00:42:30,589 --> 00:42:33,089
two feet in front of me, Paul.
759
00:42:34,269 --> 00:42:36,429
You all right?
760
00:42:36,469 --> 00:42:37,803
You look ragged.
761
00:42:40,229 --> 00:42:42,146
I feel upset, actually.
762
00:42:43,749 --> 00:42:47,669
This... Well, this is our thing,
it's our baby.
763
00:42:47,709 --> 00:42:50,428
No-one will dare try
anything like this again
764
00:42:50,429 --> 00:42:53,096
after all this, don't you worry.
765
00:42:53,989 --> 00:42:56,549
Who the hell was coughing?
766
00:42:56,589 --> 00:42:58,828
So what I'm gonna show you
is what we've edited together
767
00:42:58,829 --> 00:43:02,496
of the show so far
from the different angles.
768
00:43:02,869 --> 00:43:04,349
Play VT.
769
00:43:04,389 --> 00:43:06,629
'Googol.'
COUGHING
770
00:43:06,669 --> 00:43:08,188
That cough there, then.
771
00:43:08,189 --> 00:43:10,148
Can you ascertain
where it came from?
772
00:43:10,149 --> 00:43:11,268
Not the individual, no,
773
00:43:11,269 --> 00:43:13,108
we don't mic up
every audience member.
774
00:43:13,109 --> 00:43:14,748
But we've got different mic tracks
775
00:43:14,749 --> 00:43:16,708
covering different areas
of the studio.
776
00:43:16,709 --> 00:43:18,108
Now that particular cough.
777
00:43:18,109 --> 00:43:22,268
That came from
the Fastest Finger mic, stage right.
778
00:43:22,269 --> 00:43:24,509
Play tape C.
779
00:43:24,549 --> 00:43:27,229
One of these five, sat here.
780
00:43:50,349 --> 00:43:52,148
I'm Detective Sergeant Ferguson.
781
00:43:52,149 --> 00:43:54,028
Here's a warrant
to enter your property.
782
00:43:54,029 --> 00:43:56,348
I should tell you,
we're placing you both under arrest
783
00:43:56,349 --> 00:43:58,228
on suspicion
of procuring the execution
784
00:43:58,229 --> 00:43:59,988
of a valuable security by deception.
785
00:43:59,989 --> 00:44:01,428
You do not have to say anything...
786
00:44:01,429 --> 00:44:05,748
'What you've been told so far
in the case for the prosecution...'
787
00:44:05,749 --> 00:44:09,509
seems to make total sense,
doesn't it?
788
00:44:10,789 --> 00:44:15,148
A man, who didn't particularly
like quizzes, arrived on the show,
789
00:44:15,149 --> 00:44:18,349
behaved strangely and won a million.
790
00:44:18,389 --> 00:44:22,868
So something must be wrong.
He must have cheated. Right?
791
00:44:22,869 --> 00:44:25,948
Your Fastest Finger First machine?
You're not serious.
792
00:44:25,949 --> 00:44:27,108
Uh, it's in the garage.
793
00:44:27,109 --> 00:44:29,948
We'll also be wanting a draft copy
of your book, Mrs Ingram.
794
00:44:29,949 --> 00:44:32,148
My book?
I-I-I... It... It's not finished.
795
00:44:32,149 --> 00:44:34,468
I haven't even spell-checked it yet.
796
00:44:34,469 --> 00:44:35,668
And what about our children?
797
00:44:35,669 --> 00:44:37,668
A specially-trained officer
can stay with them,
798
00:44:37,669 --> 00:44:39,548
while you both are...
No. No.
799
00:44:39,549 --> 00:44:41,108
You are under arrest, Mrs Ingram.
800
00:44:41,109 --> 00:44:46,026
But what if I were to tell you
that it's all utter nonsense?
801
00:44:46,509 --> 00:44:47,588
That the three defendants
802
00:44:47,589 --> 00:44:49,788
who allegedly concocted
this elaborate conspiracy
803
00:44:49,789 --> 00:44:52,509
had never even met?
804
00:44:52,549 --> 00:44:56,509
Something that the prosecution
does not dispute.
805
00:44:56,549 --> 00:44:58,868
That the so-called
significant coughs
806
00:44:58,869 --> 00:45:03,789
are only 19 out of a 192 recorded
throughout the night?
807
00:45:03,829 --> 00:45:09,389
Sometimes on the right answers,
sometimes on the wrong answers.
808
00:45:09,429 --> 00:45:12,228
And that there is no way
of knowing that any of them
809
00:45:12,229 --> 00:45:15,029
even came from Mr Whittock?
810
00:45:15,069 --> 00:45:16,548
Could it simply be
811
00:45:16,549 --> 00:45:20,799
that everyone on the show
was waiting for an attack?
812
00:45:22,109 --> 00:45:24,508
For something strange to happen?
813
00:45:24,509 --> 00:45:26,508
And in walks Charles Ingram.
814
00:45:26,509 --> 00:45:31,268
A, yes, eccentric, but actually
quite intelligent army major...
815
00:45:31,269 --> 00:45:33,989
and his fate was set.
816
00:45:34,029 --> 00:45:36,868
I put it to you,
that this is, in fact,
817
00:45:36,869 --> 00:45:39,709
a series of horrible coincidences.
818
00:45:39,749 --> 00:45:43,748
And that Major Charles Ingram
is completely innocent.
819
00:45:43,749 --> 00:45:47,228
Your honour,
here is the case for the defence.
820
00:45:47,229 --> 00:45:50,549
HE COUGHS
821
00:45:51,305 --> 00:45:57,410
822
00:45:57,460 --> 00:46:02,010
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