Original subtitles

And I don't want to talk about this. Sorry.

God, you're so annoying.

Um, okay.

Something must be really bad if you're not telling me. Derek's an asshole.

Duh. You only date assholes. Tell me something I don't know.

You think they're assholes.

I know they're assholes.

Well, you would know best.

Ooh, okay.

Touche. Now maybe you can tell me what's going on. What was so bad? Well, you

know how we were having our first time today?

Yeah, you haven't shut up about it for like a week. I know.

Okay, well... It's embarrassing.

And you're gonna make fun of me for it, and he's already made fun of me.

I make fun of you for everything.

Well, apparently he does too.

What happened?

Give me a break. It couldn't have been that bad. Was he just... Did he suck in

bed or what?

No.

I guess I have a weird O face.

What?

I knew you'd laugh at me.

How weird can it be?

I don't know.

Don't masturbate and look at myself in the mirror.

Well, it's good you're not a narcissist.

But seriously, like, come on. He's probably just fucking with you.

Negging me? Maybe. I don't know. But he sounded pretty serious and he literally

didn't finish.

Well, he didn't finish.

I finished. What? He didn't finish. He was upset. He said it was weird.

Oh my god. And he laughed at me and he just like...

Went to go take a shower and... I don't know.

I just left.

Um... I mean, honestly, I could have gone a few more rounds, too.

Okay.

I don't know what to say, because, like, I'm... I told you it was weird.

Yeah, but now I can't... Can you just show me?

Can you kind of show... Just give me an idea of what... Um... What it looks

like, so I can kind of, like, gauge it for myself, because I think you're

actually serious, and now I know you're not joking. I am serious.

And, no, I can't do it unless I'm coming.

So, and that'd be weird.

Yeah.

Okay, but still, like, don't, you need a second opinion.

And so weird. What do you mean? That means I would have to, like, come

in front of you.

Okay, yeah, let's not make it any weirder than it is. It's just for, I

mean, it's a second opinion from somebody that you've known forever and

you trust.

Okay.

What's the harm?

We're not going to tell you. Are you deprived?

Deprived of what? Comedy? No.

You're pretty funny.

I'm not, you're not.

You know, get me on a deprived sexually thing, no.

I'm literally just trying to help you.

Okay. You know I'm always here for you, so, I don't know, just show me and we'll

get it over with and I can tell you the truth, because you know I never lie to

you. We have known each other longer than anyone.

Well, duh.

I mean, I've seen you naked many times.

Same. So it's not weird. You're just doing something different.

Naked.

Usually you're just yelling at me when you're naked. Throwing things at me.

It's cool.

Okay. Let me just... Fine.

But only because I'm still horny.

Okay. Well, that'll help. And nobody can find out.

Well, we're not going to tell anybody.

Yeah, it would be weird if you did. Nobody would like you ever again.

Not that they do anyways.

Hey. Don't be mean. I'm not mean to you right now. I'm being supportive.

So chop, chop. Let's get to this. I have to take my shirt off.

Okay. To get comfortable.

I hate you.

Oh, man.

Shut up.

What? You look good.

Wow, you're quiet finally.

Holy crotchless panties. Are you serious?

I wanted to be sexy.

Mission accomplished.

Shut up.

Maybe you're actually doing it.

It's kind of hot, having somebody watch.

Even me?

Yeah.

Actually, yeah.

I mean, obviously I've thought about it before, and I know you have.

Holy shit.

Right?

I don't want to admit it. That sounds like I should feel guilty about it.

Why do you think I dress like such a slut in front of you?

Oh my god.

You're a man.

I know how men think.

With their cocks.

Never their brains.

How could I not?

Have you ever thought about it?

I guess so.

I don't want to admit that, but yeah.

I think it's okay to admit anything right now.

Sorry, I'm just trying to get on your face, look at your face.

Just in case you come, you know.

Yeah, just in case I come.

Yeah.

One of my favorite things to think of when I'm touching myself is a nice fat

cock in my mouth.

What?

What?

You want it?

You want me to put my dick in your mouth?

I mean, we're already doing this.

Thank you.

Do you mind if I lay down while you do that?

It feels so good.

Wow.

Oh my god.

Oh, you look so good.

I know.

I don't get to be with girls.

So how's he? I figured.

so far. I don't see any problems. You don't look weird at all.

I can't even imagine anything that would keep me from

wanting to finish with you.

Well, aren't you sweet?

Just being honest.

You're never this nice.

You're never sucking my cock.

When he was fucking you?

Yeah.

Do you want me to fuck you?

Do you want to be inside me?

I mean, would it be any weirder than this?

I guess not.

I want you inside me. You do?

I want you inside me.

I'm ready if you are.

I'm ready.

Wow.

Holy shit.

This is really happening.

Oh, you're so tight.

Holy shit.

Oh, God.

Oh, fuck.

It feels so good.

Oh, my God.

Eric's not big like you.

Oh, my God, like this. Oh, it feels so good.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, man, it feels good.

It feels so good.

I want this all the time. I want it all the time. I'll give it to you any time

you want.

Any time you want.

That was not weird at all. That was hot as fuck.

Is he retarded?

Stop.

Holy shit.

Can we do that again?

Yes.

You really didn't think it was weird.

No.

It felt so good.

Okay, stop being annoying.