Original subtitles

[***]

MAN: Open this door!

Open this door! [POUNDING]

I said, open up, now!

[TOILET FLUSHING] What are you doing?

[WOMAN GROANS]

Who do you think you're messing with, huh?

Oh, talk back to me, why don't you?

Leave me alone, you stupid animal.

No! [SCREAMS]

Now raise your voice to me again, why don't you?

Shut up!

Stop it! Stop it!

Oh, what you gonna do with that, boy?

You gonna shoot me?

Go ahead. Pull the trigger!

You ain't gonna shoot me.

You ain't gonna do nothing.

Just like I thought! [YELLS]

You ain't got the guts!

Now, you ever rise up on me again, I'll kill you!

So help me, I'll kill both of you.

You hear me?

[SOBBING]

BOY: Ma.

[CRIES] Mom.

[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]

You know, this isn't a bad school,

and these aren't bad kids, but...

If something isn't done now, they could get into trouble.

Exactly.

They're at the age where if we don't impact them now,

we may lose them forever.

That's why we're here.

When do we get to meet the kids?

Right now. Great.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

Yo, Joey, what's up, man?

Yo, Pepper, check it out.

If I told you you had a nice body,

would you hold it against me?

[MUSIC STOPS]

If I told you you had detention,

would you hold that against me?

[KIDS LAUGH] Oh, come on, Mrs. O.

Don't be like that.

I was just trying to be friendly, that's all.

Save it, Clifton.

Students, I'd like for you to meet

Ranger Walker and Ms. Cahill.

They'll be with you up at Ranger Teen Camp.

Ah, great.

We get to spend a whole week

with Ranger Ken and Barbie.

What could be better than that?

MRS. O'SULLIVAN: I'm sorry about that.

Don't be. It's not our first time.

TRIVETTE: Hey, guys!

I apologize for being late. Court took a long time.

Mrs. O'Sullivan, this is my partner, Ranger Trivette.

Oh, it's nice to meet you, Ranger Trivette.

WALKER: He'll be at camp with us. Oh, great.

But I thought you said there was going to be seven students.

There were. Cindy Cordaro won't be joining us.

There will only be six going now.

BOY: Yo, Eddie, where'd you get the shiner?

Hi, Eddie.

What happened to him? That's Eddie Del Toro.

His mother has a live-in boyfriend who can get pretty rough.

Well, has anybody called the authorities?

MRS. O'SULLIVAN: A few times.

The mother won't press charges,

and Eddie always has a story.

Why won't Cindy Cordaro be going with us?

Cindy just found out she's three months pregnant.

Three months pregnant?

How old is she? Thirteen.

Let me give you a hand.

That's okay. I got it.

No problem.

I'm Cordell Walker.

What's your name? Eddie.

Eddie.

Nasty bruise, Eddie.

I, I fell.

Really?

I was all by myself, and I fell.

I'm kind of a spaz.

[CLASS BELL RINGS] I gotta go now.

Ms. William gets really mad if we're late.

Okay, I'll see you later, Eddie.

What'd you find out?

I just found our seventh camper.

THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

* In the eyes of a Ranger

* The unsuspecting stranger

* Had better know the truth of wrong from right

* 'Cause the eyes of a Ranger are upon you

* Any wrong you do he's gonna see

* When you're in Texas look behind you

* 'Cause that's where the Ranger's gonna be *

It's about time.

Get ready.

You're late. I had things to do.

You had things to do? Yeah. That's right.

You arrogant piece of garbage.

I oughta take that. You oughta what?

Gentlemen, huh?

Come on! You oughta what?

Gentlemen, please.

Relax.

This isn't personal.

That's the stuff?

Sixteen kilos.

You want to count it?

No.

I trust you.

Yeah.

[SNAPS FINGERS]

Gentlemen.

[ENGINE STARTS]

Yum, yum.

Easy money, eh?

DRIVER: You said it, boss.

[BEEPING]

What the... Son of a.

Stop the car!

Now, that...

...was personal.

[GAVEL BANGS]

Five hundred hours of community service?

Are you out of your mind?

I mean, uh, uh, uh, I'm sorry, Your Honor.

That's no disrespect for that last remark,

but if you want my personal opinion about this whole thing,

I mean, that last ruling is absolutely ridiculous here,

you know what I mean? Actually, Mr. Brooks,

upon further review of your file,

I find myself in complete concurrence with your opinion.

[LAUGHS] Hey, hey, hey! Hey, all right, Judgey.

One thousand hours of community service.

One thousand hours?

He's all yours, Ranger Walker.

Walker?

You mean, like, Texas Ranger

Walker!

Oh, man!

You mean me?

MRS. O'SULLIVAN: Okay, everybody together.

I want you to settle down.

Now, I want you to listen to Ranger Walker and Ms. Cahill,

and I want you to make me very proud of you.

Put your bags down here.

Camping? You mean, like, outdoors-with no-toilet-type camping?

That's what you're talking about?

Why didn't I come up with this?

This is a brilliant idea, you know.

Too bad there isn't a plane involved here.

Charlie, give your mouth a rest and help me with this.

Wait a minute. Camping and manual labor? What is this?

I'll call your name and jump onboard.

[SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY] Lisa.

Pepper.

Clifton.

Marcy. I'm right here.

Donna. Peanut.

Excuse me. Everyone calls me Peanut.

Is that what you'd like us to call you?

Okay, Peanut. Here.

Why am I so fortunate? Why am I so fortunate?

Sophisticated like me, huh?

Put the rest in yourself.

I'll put it in... ALEX: Eddie.

I'm dealing with a cowboy... Eddie?

Oh. I mean, here.

Hop on board. Joey.

[ANNOYED] What?

Does that mean you're here?

[SCOFFS]

Not because I wanna be.

Well, you don't have much of a choice, do you?

It's either the camp or juvenile hall.

Yeah, yeah, I know. Whatever.

These kids, you know, they make me nervous, you know that.

'Cause I always have to go to the bathroom,

this ain't a long trip, is it?

Whew!

Jimmy and C.D. are meeting us at the camp?

Yeah, they left early to get everything ready.

I have a feeling they're gonna have a bit more fun than we are.

Me too. Hmm.

[BASEBALL BAT THUMPS] TRIVETTE: Strike one!

Strike two!

It's goin'. It's goin'.

Oh! It's a foul ball!

Damn it, Jimmy. Would you quit hitting that mattress there?

We're working at cross purposes here.

They've got three and two on me, Big Dog.

I gotta swing for the bleachers.

It's going! It's, it's a home run!

Would you hit it downwind, please?

Why don't you shut the door?

It doesn't serve a purpose closed.

That's why I've got it open.

Big Dog, if you'd locked down the shutters last year,

there wouldn't be so much dust in the mattresses this year.

Don't hit that mattress again.

If you hit that mattress one more time,

then you're gonna be wearing this broom.

Have you got it?

I got it.

Okay. Thanks.

It's outta here! Whoo-hoo-hoo!

I warned you!

I was just joking. I warned you!

Whoa! Big Dog!

You're out!

I was just playing with you.

Well, I think I'll get back to sweeping.

So, why are you here?

I got arrested.

So this camp, they got bears up there?

No. There's no bears up there.

No bears, because the rattlesnakes

scared 'em all away.

Rattlesnakes?

Lots of rattlesnakes.

Oh, I get it. It's a joke, right?

[IMITATES RATTLING]

It is a joke, right?

It's a joke.

It's a joke.

Rattlesnakes in Texas.

[HUMMING]

Well, Jimmy, how you doin' over there?

Picasso, man,

Picasso.

[CHUCKLING]

Oh, no, no, no, no!

No--! Wait a minute-- Wait a minute, Jimmy.

What?

You're supposed to paint the siding green

and these little strips here are supposed to be white.

White with green strips.

No, no, no. No, wait, please. Hey!

What?

Green... with white strips--

No, no, that's not what you told me.

You said white with green striping...

Hey, guys! Look! There's a restaurant up ahead!

All right, good! We can eat.

[CHILDREN CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]

Give us a break, we're all starving to death.

We're almost there, and C.D.'s gonna have lunch for us.

And C.D. is?

C.D. Parker. He's a retired Texas Ranger.

And he's making our lunch? ALEX: Yeah.

Texas Ranger Chef? What's his specialty?

Cowpies? Ha-ha-ha!

[CHILDREN LAUGHING]

Whoa.

CHARLIE: Oh, man.

JOEY: Great.

Terrific. A flat tire.

Okay, why don't you take the kids to the diner, have lunch?

Alrighty.

Kids, grab your coats!

Come on. Everybody out.

Go ahead.

WALKER: Come on.

All right.

Na, na, na, na, na, na!

What are you doing?

Well, I'll... You!

It's gonna be white with green trim, buddy.

Okay, you smart aleck. I'll show you a thing or two.

No! Yes, I will.

Charlie! What?

Get back here.

I'm gonna go get something to eat over here.

I said get back here.

Look, you see these hands?

These hands don't do manual labor, okay?

Or changing a tire, uh-uh. Way out of the question.

There's a first time for everything.

Now get the tire.

You wanna know something, Walker?

I mean, you know, nothing personal here.

I don't want to, you know, disrespect you at all,

but you're starting to get on my nerves a little bit.

Will you just get the tire?

[ALL CHUCKLING]

CHARLIE: I'm getting the tire, all right?

I love camping. I just love this stuff.

[GRUMBLES]

What are you doing?

I'm trying to get a tire here.

Think that's the way Mickey Mantle got started?

I mean, he's around from here, right?

Texas someplace?

What else am I supposed to do?

You want me to change the oil?

WALKER: No, just stand there and watch.

CHARLIE: I'm watching. I'm watching.

So how long are we gonna be holed up in this dump anyways?

Joey Suds is coming up from Dallas in the morning.

Joey Suds is coming here?

A money launderer that makes house calls?

Is this a great country or what?

And the second elephant says, "No soap. Radio."

Get them out of here.

Thank you.

Can we have this?

I'm sorry, ma'am, but the kitchen's closed.

Excuse me?

WAITRESS: The kitchen's closed.

No, it's not.

Um, it is, uh, for you.

[CHUCKLES] You can't do this.

I'm sorry.

No. You don't understand.

You can't do this. It's against the law.

Uh, lady, I don't want to have to say it again.

The kitchen's closed.

And, uh, you got about 15 seconds

to get this little pack of mutts out of here.

CLIFTON: Pack of mutts? Clifton.

Who you calling a pack of mutts?

Dang! You so ugly, when you were born,

the doctor slapped your mother.

Ooh! Ooh!

You got a real smart mouth on you, boy.

[LAUGHS]

What's going on?

They won't let us eat.

Who won't let you eat?

Kitchen's closed.

Is that right?

Yeah, it's right.

You got a problem with that?

Yeah, I've got a problem with that.

Uh-huh, and, uh, what are you gonna do about it?

I'm gonna ask you very nice to sit down and behave yourself.

Oh, you're gonna ask us real nice?

Isn't that sweet?

He's gonna ask us nice.

Uh, well, what if we say no?

Then I'm not gonna ask you so nice.

CHARLIE: Oh, boy.

Why do I have a feeling that something none too nice

is gonna be happening around here?

Don't do that.

Yeah. I, I'm sorry.

[GRUNTS] [KIDS EXCLAIM]

BOY: Whoa.

KID: Whoa!

[GROANING]

[GRUNTING]

MAN: Nighty-night.

CHARLIE: How'd we do? How'd I do?

'Cause this fighting stuff makes me very nervous.

You did fine, Charlie.

[KIDS LAUGHING]

Oh, jeez.

ALEX: Where's Joey?

Oh, right here. I had to use the rest room.

So, what's good?

[EXCITED CHATTER]

LEADER: Where's the money?

Come on. Come on. Come on.

Which one of you idiots left the money in the car?

It's very simple.

Somebody knows something.

Find 'em.

[JIMMY LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY]

You look like you need a little more.

Huh? Huh? You need some more?

[JIMMY LAUGHS]

C.D.: Need some more?

Well, I'll get some more out of the bucket.

I'll get some out of the bucket.

JIMMY: Okay! Okay! Okay! Okay!

[LAUGHING]

JIMMY: Okay! Okay! Okay!

Oh, yeah. How about a little there?

[LAUGHS]

How about a little back there?

Can you believe this?

Our children. Your children.

[LAUGHS] Oh, my gosh, hi. Welcome to Ranger Teen Camp.

It's a good thing we ate at the diner.

Welcome.

ALEX: He was sentenced to a thousand hours of community service,

and this is a perfect place for him to start.

[SIGHS] Well, Alex, I'm not trying to second-guess Cordell,

and I'm not trying to dispute your thoughts,

but this fella is a convicted criminal,

and a criminal is a criminal is a criminal.

Being out here with these kids

is just like putting a fox in the henhouse.

He doesn't have any business out here, hon.

[WHISTLES]

Yo, Black, let me ask you something.

Whoa.

What'd you call me? Black.

What, you got a problem with being Black?

No, I don't have a problem being Black.

It's just not my name. My name's Ranger Trivette.

Want to try it again?

[SIGHS] Forget it.

CHARLIE: Aw, come on, Walker.

Hey, Trivette!

Yeah? You just can't leave.

What is this leaving stuff, huh?

Oh, man.

Governor Bush called.

He wants to meet me tomorrow morning in Austin.

Well, just tell him you're busy.

You don't tell the governor that, Charlie.

Can you handle things here?

Yeah. I got C.D. and Alex.

What about me? What am I, chopped liver or something?

And I got Charlie.

Okay. I'll see you in Dallas.

All right. All right.

Drive safe.

Hey, man, where are you going?

What's up?

This better be worth it, Joey.

Trust me, man. It's worth it.

This is pretty sweet.

Wow, this really is cool.

Check it out.

Damn! Where'd you get it?

Ms. Cahill, Ranger Trivette, come quick!

It's Peanut. What's the matter?

She got stung by a bee,

and she's turning purple and stuff.

I got the kit.

Ms. Cahill, Ranger Trivette,

I don't know if she's breathing.

What happened?

Talk to me.

All we were doing was playing tag,

and she stepped on a hornets' nest.

ALEX: Anaphylactic shock.

She's probably allergic.

Please.

Peanut?

She's gotta be okay.

Come on.

Come on, girl.

Oh, that's a girl.

Okay.

She's okay. All right, girl.

Tag.

You're it.

[KIDS LAUGH]

JIMMY: She's gonna be all right.

If you help me get it back to Dallas,

I'll cut you in for half, bro.

I don't know, Joey.

Whoever lost this is gonna come looking for it.

Let 'em look. We're up here with two rangers and a lady DA.

This is the last place they're gonna look.

Yo, this is serious green.

And all we gotta do is shut up about it for a week,

and by the time we get back to the big D,

we'll be set for life.

So are you down with this or what?

Yeah, I'm down. You kidding?

For this kind of cash,

I'm so down, I'm under the ground.

Let's get out of here.

What do we do with this piece of garbage?

Make him comfortable.

Sit down. [GRUNTS]

Come on.

What's all this about, huh?

Where is it?

Where is what?

I don't know what you're talking about.

A case was taken from our vehicle.

We want it back.

And you think I took it?

I didn't take it.

Hey, hey, wait a minute. Just wait a minute!

It could have been, uh...

Must have been those kids.

What kids?

A bunch of punks.

They were at the diner with some, uh,

some lady and a kickboxing cowboy.

Must have been them.

They looked like the type.

If you know what I mean.

Take him out.

Get rid of him.

[MEN STRUGGLING]

JIMMY: * I don't know but it's been said *

KIDS: * I don't know but it's been said *

* Country air will clear your head *

KIDS: * Country air will clear your head *

JIMMY: * Sound off *

KIDS: * One, two! *

JIMMY: * Bring it on down *

KIDS: One, two, three, four.

ALL: One, two, three four!

All right. [CHEERING]

CHARLIE: I don't know, but I've been told.

KIDS: I don't know, but I've been told.

C.D.'s chili tastes like mold.

KIDS: C.D.'s chili tastes like mold.

Sound off! KIDS: One, two.

Having fun is one thing,

but making light of a man's chili is another.

Shame on you, old man.

There you go.

Oopsy-daisy.

Release.

Yes.

Release.

Wow!

Wow. Right.

Yeah!

All right!

All right! Release.

Take a deep breath. Hold it.

All right, knee up.

Snap. All right?

Whoa!

Whoa. Go!

Yikes.

All right, gimme five. Gimme five.

Hey, all right.

Clifton, let's go. Very good.

All right, go!

Whoo!

Clifton, come back and do it again.

Go!

All right, how many of you think

that was a good roundhouse kick?

I do.

Wrong. That was an excellent roundhouse kick.

Good work, Clifton.

Thanks, Ranger Trivette.

Thank you. All right, Eddie.

ALEX: Come on, Eddie.

[CHEERING] TRIVETTE: Tear 'em up, Eddie.

And go!

Can't do anything right!

I don't even know why I'm here.

JIMMY: What, are you a loser?

Eddie, let me tell you something.

You tried your hardest. You gave it your all.

That's not the mark of a loser.

That's the mark of a winner.

It is?

Yes, it is.

All right, Eddie!

All right, Eddie. All right, huh?

Ah!

Here it is. "Alex Cahill."

What do we do with them?

Kill them. [WOMAN WHIMPERS]

Then we'll find the kids, get our money back.

[GUN COCKS]

LISA: Get in the boat? You've got to be kidding.

No way. Sorry. No can do.

I'm afraid of the water.

Well, there's only one way to overcome your fear.

Overcome it?

Who said anything about wanting to overcome it?

Actually, I've grown kind of attached to it.

[CHUCKLES]

Take my hand. You can do this.

I can't do this.

Come on, Lisa. If I could do it, you can do it.

Yeah, come on. We're all in the boats here.

Let's go. Come on, it's easy.

Take my hand.

I can't do this! One step at a time.

Ms. Cahill! There you are.

[KIDS CHEERING] [MOTORS START]

Wow! This is great!

I think I like it!

[LAUGHING]

[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]

CHARLIE: Hey, Joey! Joey, come on out here.

It's fun. Come on.

No, thanks.

What's the matter?

This Alex Cahill

is an assistant district attorney.

So what's your point?

[PLAYFUL CHATTER]

Throw it!

You know, it's really something nice

to see these kids enjoying this.

ALEX: Yeah, they really seem to be coming around.

Most of them.

I thought you said you didn't even like Ranger Trivette.

I know, but I don't know.

He seems like he's okay.

Dude, he's a Texas Ranger.

Maybe we should tell him.

Who knows?

There could be a reward or something.

A reward?

What? Like, like 100 bucks?

See, there must be a million bucks in that suitcase.

Look, see, if you don't want to split it, that's fine.

But I ain't just about to go and turn it over.

Wait up.

Oh.

Oh, no. Not again.

How, how you doing up there?

I'm really trying hard.

You just ain't making it easy for me, you know?

That, that's all that I got to say.

You know, thanks for listening.

Wow.

C.D.: We're gonna have to talk to those two young men about this.

Well, you see, that's the problem with you cops, see.

I mean, you don't think like crooks.

What the hell does that mean?

CHARLIE: What I'm saying here is that if you talk to the kids about it,

you know, they're just gonna, well, they're gonna deny it.

They're gonna say that they don't have nothing to do with this at all.

So what do you suggest?

What I'm suggesting is,

is that you don't talk to the kids about it.

You get the kids...

...to talk to you.

You get it?

CHARLIE: Now, now, you think you can handle this?

Charlie, I got it.

All right, I mean, there's no disrespect here at all.

I'm just nervous about the whole thing, you know,

because I want it to work so bad for the kids' sake.

You know what I mean? Charlie, I got it.

Okay, come on. Let's do this.

All right, good luck. Thanks.

All right, story time, guys and gals.

Okay, look, I'll get y'all some hot chocolate when you get back.

KIDS: Thank you. Thank you, C.D.

Thanks.

Thank you, Charlie.

BOY: Thanks, Charlie.

Okay. A young Indian boy

used to live out in these woods

a long, long time ago.

His name was Tommy Six Moons.

He used to hunt and fish out here.

One day, he was hunting for deer,

and he discovered this cave

hidden in the side of the mountain.

Since he was no different than you guys,

he decided he wanted to explore it,

so he went inside,

and he discovered something else.

Gold.

Gold?

Yeah, lots of gold

right in the rocks.

More gold than he'd ever seen in his entire life,

enough to make his village richer than rich.

So did he go down and tell the people of his village?

No, he did not, because he was greedy.

Tommy was greedy, and he wanted all that gold for himself.

So what'd he do?

So every day for the next six months,

every chance he got, he would sneak away to that secret cave

and chip away at those rocks.

Six months? He must have had a ton of gold.

Mmm-hmm. Big humongous pile

right in the front of the mountain, and get this,

the more gold that he got, the more gold he wanted.

And the more gold he wanted, the more scared he got

that somebody was gonna find out about his secret.

So what happened?

So he worked that cave,

day and night, night and day,

chipping away at those rocks,

super-focused on getting that gold out of there.

Man, that's exactly what I would have done. Wouldn't you?

He was so focused that he never noticed when a landslide

dropped all these boulders right in front of the cave,

trapped him inside.

He was trapped inside?

Mmm-hmm. Tried to dig his way out.

That was no use. He tried calling for help.

Nobody could hear him.

[SCOFFS] Well, what about the people in the village?

They came and looked for him, right?

It was a secret cave.

PEPPER: So they never found him?

Yeah, they found him years later,

his skeleton on top of that big, humongous pile of gold.

And to this day, people say when the moon is full,

you can still hear old Tommy crying.

"I should have told."

"I should have told."

"I should have told."

[WHISPERS] Joey. You gotta tell.

GIRL: Yeah, that's scary.

Okay.

Okay.

[SIGHS]

Ranger Trivette.

Yeah?

We gotta talk.

Let me ask you something.

Yeah, what?

You had all that money.

How come you didn't take off to Mexico City?

You know what, C.D.?

The old Charlie Brooks probably would have.

But, you know, a changed man is a...

A changed man is a,

you know, changed man.

Yeah.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Well, that must be them.

Watch this chocolate, will you?

Yeah, yeah.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

All right, all right.

What?

What's this all about?

You were great.

Thanks.

When we get back, I'll call the local sheriff

and turn everything over to him.

Hey, what's going on in there?

Hey, what do I gotta do,

everything around here or what, huh?

You punk.

Shut up, old man, or you're next.

Old man, this can be easy,

or this can be hard.

It's entirely up to you.

Shh. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

MAN: You'll tell us one way or another, old man.

Somebody's here.

Um... Um, Ranger Trivette.

Uh, that's the car.

What car?

KIDS [OVERLAPPING]: What are you talking about?

Shh! Everybody be quiet.

Alex, get everybody to the other side of the lake.

I'll meet you there.

What's going on? Shh!

Just go. Do as I say.

Joey, go. Ranger.

Joey, go.

Oh, but it's my fault.

I'm gonna ask you one more time.

Where are they?

I don't know.

[SIGHS] Your choice.

[GRUNTS]

This could have been easy.

ALEX: Come on, kids!

JOEY: Come on, man. We gotta do something.

[CHOKING]

[GRUNTS LOUDLY]

[GROANS]

Ow.

Maybe I ought to put him out of his misery.

Yeah, that's real funny, you know?

[FLOORBOARD CREAKS]

What was that?

Check it out.

[CREAKS]

[AUTOMATIC WEAPON FIRES]

[DEBRIS RATTLES]

[ARM CRACKS] [SCREAMS]

All right.

Where's the money? You got three seconds.

One,

two.

[THUMPS]

Drop it.

[CHUCKLES] Drop it?

What are you gonna do with that, huh?

You gonna shoot me?

Go ahead. Shoot.

And I'll shoot him.

This is bad. This is really bad.

Oh, yeah. Well, if you're gonna use it, use it.

Come on, shoot! Gee, mister, come on.

We'll give you your money back.

It's a little too late for that.

[CLANGS] [GROANS]

Oh, my God.

Eddie.

Attaboy, Eddie.

All right, let's get these guys out of here.

Lunch Monday, Jimmy.

JIMMY: All right.

How you feeling, Charlie?

How am I feeling?

Like I got hit on the head with the butt of a gun.

How do you think I'm feeling here?

Well, I just wanted to tell you

that, um, that I'm sorry,

that you can come out to this lake anytime you want to.

Well, thanks. I appreciate that.

You take care of yourself.

All right.

You, too, C.D.

[KIDS CHATTERING]

Hey, Charlie. Hi, Charlie.

Hey, hey, how you doing, everybody? How you doing?

Are you okay?

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm fine.

I'm just glad to be alive, you know.

[CHUCKLES]

Joey and Clifton showed up

with this bow and arrow to kill the bad guy.

And then Eddie came up and hit him on the head with a frying pan.

Our Eddie?

Yup. JOEY: Hey, Eddie.

Hey, you were the coolest, man.

Really, bro. You were the coolest.

You're our hero.

CHARLIE: Wow. Eddie gets kissed here, huh?

GIRL: Ooh.

I mean, that's a real hero, Eddie,

getting kissed and all.

CHARLIE: [LAUGHS] Ow!

[GLASS BREAKS] MAN: Where are they?

I don't know. Tell me!

I don't know. What did you do with it?

Let go of her!

I told you you ever messed with me again,

I'd kill you!

Tell that to my friends!

They know all about you!

It's okay, Mom. It's okay now.

[GROANS]

JIMMY: Stay down.

Unless you want a piece of me also.

I'm sorry, Mama,

but I couldn't let him hurt us anymore.

Thank you, sir. Thank you.

Thank you, Ranger Walker.

Charlie, come here.

Here's my number.

Future reference.

Okay, you've worked a total of six-and-a-half days.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Half a day? What's this half a day stuff?

Okay, uh, should we just make it a even seven days?

Yeah, seven days.

Yeah, okay.

All right, an even seven days.

That gives you a total of 56 hours.

Okay, 56 hours. That's better. That's good.

That leaves you...

Nine hundred and forty four hours left.

[LAUGHS] Oh, man.

Say, don't we have a whitewater rafting trip coming up?

Yeah, that's right.

Twenty-five kids.

Whitewater rafting?

Yeah, 25 kids.

No, no, no, no. That's not for me.

No. You can forget that whole thing.

Whitewater rafting?

Right. What do I know about whitewater rafting?

You ever think what happens with 25 kids when it gets dark?

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

* 'Cause the eyes of a Ranger are upon you

* Any wrong you do he's gonna see

* When you're in Texas look behind you

* 'Cause that's where the Ranger's gonna be *