Original subtitles

Now hear this.

Now hear this.

Reveille.

I repeat.

Reveille.

Attention all hands.

Because another cigarette butt has been found in the container of the captain's

palm tree,

again tonight.

That is war.

All right. Hit the deck.

Rise and shine. Greet the new day.

Off your hock and grab your sock.

Reveille. Reveille.

Okay, chief.

You done your duty. Now get your big fat can out of here.

Now hear this.

Now hear this.

C and E and S divisions and all pharmacist mates will air

bedding today.

Positively.

I was greeted with six more cases of beriberi.

Double beriberi this time.

So help me, I'm going down to the ship's library and throw that old copy of Moby

Dick overboard.

What are you giving him these days for double beriberi?

Aspirin. What else?

Something wrong, Doug?

No.

We missed you when you went on watch last night.

I gave young Ensign Pulver another drink of alcohol and orange juice, and it

inspired him to relate further amorous feats of his.

Did he tell you about the time he overwhelmed a 45-year-old maiden?

The simple tactic of being the first man in her life to ask her a direct

question.

No, but some of the things he related positively bordered on the supernatural.

I don't know what to do about young Pulver.

Perhaps I should report his record to the American Medical Association.

Hey,

there is something wrong, isn't there?

I've been up all night, Doc.

Yeah?

What's the matter? What is it?

I saw something last night that just about knocked me out.

What happened?

I was up on the bridge.

I was just standing there looking out to sea. I couldn't bear to look at that

island anymore.

All of a sudden, I noticed something, little black specks crawling across the

horizon.

I looked through the glasses, and it was a formation of our ships that stretched

for miles.

Carriers and battleships and cans, a whole task force, Doc. Why didn't you

break me out? I've never seen a battleship. They came on and passed

within a half a mile of that reef.

Carriers so big, they blacked out half the sky.

Battle wagons sliding along, dead.

I could see the men on the bridges.

And this is what knocked me out, Doc.

Somehow, I thought I was on those bridges.

I thought I was riding west across the Pacific.

I watched them till they were out of sight, Doc, and I was right there on

those bridges all the time.

Yeah, I know how that must have hurt, Doug.

Then I looked down from our bridge and saw our captain's palm tree.

Our trophy for superior achievement.

The Admiral John J. Finchley Award for delivering more toothpaste and toilet

paper than any other Navy cargo ship in the safe area of the Pacific.

Read this, Doc. See how it sounds.

What is it? My application for transfer. I've been rewriting it ever since I got

off watch last night. Not another one. This one's different, Doc. I'm trying

something new, a stronger wording. Read it carefully.

From Lieutenant J.G. Douglas Roberts to Bureau of Naval Personnel, 16 April

1945, subject, change of duty, request for.

Boy, this is sheer poetry. Go on, Doc.

For two years and four months, I have served aboard this vessel as cargo

officer. I feel that my continued service aboard can only reduce my

usefulness to the Navy and increase disharmony aboard this ship. How about

that?

It is therefore urgently requested that I be ordered to combat duty, preferably

aboard a destroyer. What do you say, Doc? I got a chance, haven't I?

Listen, Doug.

You've been sending in a letter every week for goodness knows how long. Not

like this one. And every week the captain screams like a stuck pig.

disapproves your letter and forwards it that way.

That's just my point, Doc. He does forward them just because... The captain

of a Navy ship is the most absolute monarch left in this world. I know that.

If he endorsed any of your letters approved, your orders would come through

like that.

But disapproved, you haven't a prayer.

You're stuck on this old bucket.

Face it. Well, it's still a chance, Doc. It's still a chance.

I'm sorry you ever saw that task force, Duggan.

Well, I've got to go down to my hypochondriacs.

Morning, Mr. Roberts.

Morning, Doughty.

and it is down in that mess hall.

Oh, look at that cruddy island.

Smell it.

It's hot. It already smells like a hog pen.

You think we'll get out of here today, sir?

I don't know, Doughty. The three LCMs coming alongside for supplies.

You getting up yet?

Yeah, they're starting to stumble around down there, that poor punch drum.

Mr. Roberts, when are you going to the captain again and ask him to give this

crew a liberty?

These guys ain't been off this ship for over a year except on duty.

Dowdy, the last time I asked the captain was last night. What'd he say?

He said no.

We gotta get these guys ashore. They're going Asiatic.

When you see them again anyhow, Mr. Roberts, just don't spoil it. You know I

will, Dowdy.

In the meantime, have Dolan type that up for me, will you? Oh, your letter. Yes,

sir.

Now hear this. Now hear this.

Sweepers, man your brooms. Give her a clean sweep down four and a half. Sweep

down all ladders and all passageways.

Do not throw trash over the fantail.

Now sick call will commence immediately.

Now. Say, Doc, when I woke up this morning, I... And remembered you were

working cargo.

Continue. Honest, Doc, I couldn't even straighten up.

I guess it's the old appendix again, huh, Doc?

That appendix of yours certainly gets around, Reber.

Now it's on the wrong side.

Two aspirin, marked for duty. Next.

Aspirin? For a floating appendix, Doc?

Yeah, it's the latest thing.

I'll have one with you.

Next.

Well, where do you hurt?

It's my head, Doc.

It's my head.

Dizzy? Well, yeah, it's terrible.

Ringing in your ears?

Well, I mean, it's all the time, Doc.

Like bells?

That's it, Doc, like bells.

Huh?

That, Doc.

How do they go? Dong-dong?

Ding-ding or ding-dong?

It's important.

Ding... Dong?

Dong-ding?

No second guessing. Too bad. Should go dong-dong.

One aspirin, mark for duty. There is now available at the ship's store a small

supply of peanut bread.

Ship's store will be open from 1300 to 1315.

Insignia, we've got a real special job for you.

You stay right here and clean these binoculars for the bridge.

Now let me work out forward, Chief.

I want to be around this crud man, you know.

Yeah, Chief, take insignia with you. Oh, get lost.

Cut it out, the both of you.

I'm tired of you two bellyaching. Now go on, get scraping.

Hey, Steph.

Which of these binoculars are you supposed to look through, huh?

Well, I guess it's optional, Insignia.

Depends on what size eyeball you got.

Hey, uh, what time would it be in San Francisco?

About midnight last night.

Midnight last night?

Yeah, the Jets must have took over that island.

There's a red and white flag on that new building.

Jabs. We ain't been within 5,000 miles of any jabs.

Jabs. You hear that, Wiley?

Smiling.

That's a hospital flag.

Hey, Steph.

They got a fancy building on that island.

Yeah. They got big windows and...

Nurse! She's taking a shower!

Yeah, look! Look, second story, second story. See, she's a blonde, see?

Get off my back! Knock it off!

I ain't never seen such a beautiful girl.

She sure had taken a long time in that shower.

Yeah, honey.

Come on over here by the window.

How do you use this thing?

Oh, there's another one over by the wife's face and taking a shampoo.

Aye, she's got a bathrobe on.

What a stupid way to take a shampoo with a bathrobe on. What's stupid about it?

You think she wants a... Wow!

Please, fellas, come on. Hey, didn't I tell you she was beautiful?

Yeah, man.

I can't even see the island.

Oh, so long, Blondie.

There goes the other one.

Imagine that pig not taking a shower.

Oh, come on, girls.

Who's next?

I'm getting it.

I'm getting it. Yeah.

But there ain't no one in there now. Hey, sweet, try mine.

They must think we got nothing better to do than stand here.

You see anything, Swede? No, you've been panting on the lens.

At his glances, it's getting heavy.

Yeah, we're wasting manpower. Let's take turns, okay? Yeah, I'll take the first

watch. Okay.

Look.

There goes a seagull.

Fleischmann!

See anything, Mannion?

They're gone.

Why, you dirty miserable cheat. Oh, it's too bad. There were three in a minute

ago. One was just about to take a jump.

Get off.

Signet, you hear me? Knock it off.

Get out of here. Get out of here.

I'll kill him. Do you hear me? I'll kill him.

All right.

Get below all of you. Sash your heads.

Hold it right there, mister.

What's that man doing on deck without a shirt?

I was just speaking to him about that, Captain.

I want that man put on report.

I don't want no one on deck without a shirt.

Is that clearly understood?

All right, all right. Keep your shirt on.

All of you.

You seen that, sir?

Last night down in the compartment, I stopped three of them flights. Worse

than that. They gotta have a liberty, Mr. Roberts.

Yeah, they sure do.

Dowdy, call a boat for me, will you? I'm going ashore.

What are you gonna do? I just got a new angle.

You're not going over the captain's head. I'm going around his end, I hope.

Get the lead out, Dowdy.

If I could be with you one hour tonight If I was free to do the things I might

I'm telling you true, I'd be anything but blue

If I could be with you.

Hey, what's new, Doug boy?

I'm gonna take a launch over to the island.

Over to the island?

Hey, how'd you like some company, Doug?

I'll go get some aspirin for Doc, you know, at that new hospital they're

starting to build.

What's the matter?

Why, Frank Thurlow Pulver.

Huh? You mean to say you'd be willing to unglue yourself from that sack for the

purpose of doing a favor for someone else? Now, let's just not have any more

of that usual attitude towards Pulver, boy. I said one simple thing, I'd be

perfect. Frank, okay, hurry up.

Okay.

Yeah, just in case, Pulver boy, just in case.

See you later, dog boy!

Okay.

If I could be with you I'd love you strong If I could be with you I'd love

you long I want you to know I wouldn't go Until I told you, honey, why I love

you so If I could be with you one hour tonight, if I was free to do the things

I might, I'm telling you true, I'd be anything but blue if I, if I could be

with you.

Hey.

Ah, welcome aboard.

Oh, my goodness.

Attention! Well, this is going to be all right. You girls just got in here, huh?

Where are you from?

No, don't tell me. Let me guess.

Hey, how many of you girls are there?

Captain, aren't you going to answer our salute?

Answer?

Sure, yeah. It'll make you feel any happier.

We thought maybe we were doing it wrong, Captain.

You see, we haven't had much experience.

Well, that's wonderful.

Is that your battleship in the harbor, Captain?

Not exactly, no.

Is there anything you want?

I mean, anything in particular?

No, nothing I can think of in particular.

Oh, aspirin. What about aspirin? I got a requisition right here.

Aspirin right here. All right, right this way. Get back to work, men.

You carry on there, men.

You know, I'm actually not captain of that AK. Oh, no kidding.

I'm the exec.

Certainly must have an awful lot of BF.

Who, me?

What do you mean, me?

Battle fatigue with all this aspirin. Oh.

Seen a lot of action?

Well, I sure as heck haven't seen much action this past year.

You mean battle action. Well, I got a little shrapnel in my left leg, but it

gives me a twinge now and then. Well, I hear that scotch works wonders. You like

scotch?

I was acquiring a taste for it before they shipped us out. Here's your

aspirin. Thanks.

Would you like to come out to the ship this afternoon?

Sorry. Because it just so happens I have a bottle of Red Label in my cabin.

The shoreboat at the dock at 1800 minus 10.

Oh, will I? 1800 minus 10.

It's 10 minutes to 6.

Yeah.

Oh, I see I caught your interest.

I want these other girls to hear, but if you were to come over alone this

afternoon... Here's your letter, Mr. Roberts. I typed it up. Just

sign your old John Henry here, and I'll take it to the captain. Then hold your

ears.

Mr. Roberts?

Oh, it's only you, Ensign Palmer.

What are you doing in Mr. Roberts' locker?

There's a shoebox in there somewhere, Dolan. I can't find it.

Well, it was stolen, that's all. There's just nothing they'll stop at.

Broken right into the sanctity of a man's own locker.

Hey, Mr. Roberts back on the island yet? Yeah. No, I don't know.

Well, as soon as he gets back, have him sign this, baby. What is it?

What is it?

It's the best letter Mr. Roberts wrote yet.

It's gonna blow the old man right through the overhead.

This letter's liable to get him transferred.

Let me see that.

Get a load of this line right here.

increased disharmony aboard this ship.

Ain't that a kick.

Oh, I can't wait to jab this baby in the old man's face.

You know how he gets sick to his stomach when he gets extra mad at Mr. Roberts?

Yeah. When I deliver this letter, I'm gonna take along a wastebasket. Let me

know when Mr. Roberts gets back.

Mm-hmm.

suspicious fight you ever saw in your life. After Dottie and I broke up the

fight, I figured I had to do something and do it right away.

Hey, Frank, Dolan been in here with my letter.

I, uh, don't know, uh, Doug Boy, I just came in here myself.

Doug, you don't know anyone on that island, do you? Yeah, the port director,

the guy who decides where to send this ship next.

A Liberty port, for instance.

Dottie tipped me off. He used to drink a quart of scotch every day of his life.

Doug, you didn't give that shoebox to that... port director i did compliments

to the captain you've been hoarding a quart of scotch in a shoebox i was gonna

break it out the day i get off this ship resurrection day you wasted that bottle

of scotch on a man will you name me another sex within a thousand miles

what's eating you anyway frank well look at the fancy pillows

Somebody expecting company?

Good Lord.

To Joan Lemoore, souvenir of San Diego.

Oh, you kid.

Tonight or never.

Compliments of the American Harvester Company.

We plow deep while others sleep.

Doc, that new hospital hasn't got nurses, has it?

It didn't have yesterday.

It has today.

And how did you find out they were there?

Just came to me all of a sudden.

I was lying on my bunk here this morning, thinking, and there wasn't a

breath of air.

And all of a sudden, a funny thing happened. A little breeze came up.

And I took a big, deep breath, and I said to myself, Pulver, boy, there's

women on that island.

You know, a thing like that could make a bird dog real self-conscious.

They flew in last night.

Knockouts, and one big blonde especially.

See, of course, she went for me right away, naturally.

So I started to turn on the old personality, you know, and I said, isn't

there anything in the world that'll make you come out to this ship with me? And

she says, yes. She said, yes, there is one thing and one thing only.

A good stiff drink of scotch.

I'm sorry, Frank.

Oh, yeah, you're sorry. I'm really sorry.

Your first assignment in a year. I was gonna bring her right in here.

Had all my old pillows out.

Slip her a couple of fast slugs of scotch and... Without that scotch, she

wouldn't... She just wouldn't, that's all.

Doc, let's make some scotch.

Scotch? His naval officers were supposed to be resourceful. Frank here's got a

great opportunity, and I've let him down. Let's fix him up.

Right.

Frank, where's the rest of that alcohol we were drinking last night?

Now, that ain't even the right color.

Quiet, boy.

Color.

Coke. You got any?

i haven't seen a coke in four months no it's five months oh

i

forgot i had it

uh

what shade would you like shade pale smoky oh well i told

her red labels

Red label.

Yeah, well, it may look like it. It sure won't taste like it.

Doc?

What does scotch taste like?

Oh, it tastes like, uh... Uh... You know what it's always tasted a little like to

me?

Iodine.

One drop of iodine for taste.

Let me try that.

They call it for a medical opinion.

How about it?

We're on the right track.

Now we need a little something extra for age.

What have you got there, Doug?

Seltzer.

Bismolino fruit salt. Hair tonic.

Hair tonic.

That's got a coal tar base.

One drop of hair tonic for age.

That'll age the daylights out of it.

You know, it does taste a little like scotch.

Do you know? It does.

Smooth. That dumb little blonde will never know the difference.

All right, Frank.

Doug and I made the scotch.

The nurse is your department. Oh, she won't know the difference. She won't

know the difference. Thank you, Doc.

She'll never know the difference.

Oh, you won't know the difference, will you, baby? No, you won't. Oh, no, you

won't. Thank you, Doc.

Thanks, Doug.

Gee, you guys are wonderful to me. Ah, don't mention it, Frank. I think you

almost deserve it. You do, really?

Or you just give me the old needle again.

What do you really think of me, Doug?

Honestly.

Frank, I like you.

There's no getting around the fact you're a real likable guy.

Yeah, yeah.

But... But what?

Well, I also think you're the most hapless, lazy, disorganized,

and in general, the most lecherous person I've ever known in my life.

I am not! You're not what?

I'm not disorganized, for one thing. Have you ever in your life finished one

thing you started out to do? You sleep 16 hours a day.

You pretend you want me to improve your mind. You've never finished one book

I've given you to read. I finished God's Little Acre, duck boy. I didn't give you

that. He's been reading God's Little Acre for over a year now.

He's underlined every erotic passage and added exclamation points.

And after a certain pornographic climax, he's inserted the words, well written.

You're the laundry and morale officer. I doubt if you've ever seen the laundry. I

was down there only last week. And you're scared of the captain? I am not

scared of the captain. Then why do you hide in the passageway every time you

see him coming? You're scared of him. I am not.

I'm scared of myself. I'm scared of what I might do to him. What you might do to

him? Doc, he lies in his sack all day long, bores me silly with great moronic

plots against the captain.

He's never carried out one of them. I haven't, huh? No, Frank, you haven't.

Whatever happened to those marbles you were going to put on the captain's

overhead so they'd roll around all night and keep him awake?

Now you've gone too far.

Now you've asked for it.

What does that look like?

Five. Marbles.

Got another one in my pocket.

Six marbles.

I'm looking for marbles all day long.

Frank, you asked me what I thought of you. Well, I'll tell you.

The day you finish, one thing you started out to do...

The day you actually put those marbles in the captain's overhead and then have

the guts to knock on his door and say, Captain, I put those marbles there,

that's the day I'll have some respect for you.

That's the day I'll look up to you as a man.

Okay?

Okay.

Where's Dolan with my letter? I'm gonna go find him. No, wait a minute, Doug.

Listen. I wouldn't send a letter like that in if I were you, boy. You're gonna

get yourself in trouble saying things like disharmony aboard this ship.

Um, you know, if you didn't say disharmony or harmony... Where's that

letter? I don't know, Doug.

What's the big idea? I just wanted to talk to you before you signed it.

Please don't sign that letter, Doug. Now, please don't.

They'll transfer you. You'll get your can shot off, boy.

Doc, will you tell him what you were telling me last night about how stupid

he is?

Maybe you'd like to tell me to my face.

Yes, I would.

You are stupid, Doug, and I can prove it.

You quit medical school just to get into this thing when you could be saving

lives today. Why?

Has it ever occurred to you that the guys who are fighting this war might

also be saving lives?

Yours and mine, for instance.

Well, right now, I'd rather practice that kind of medicine, Doctor.

Well, right now, that's exactly what you're doing. Are you kidding?

Look, whether you like it or not, this sorry old bucket...

does a necessary job and you're the guy who keeps a lumbering along you know it

could be that right here on this bucket you're deeper and more truly in this war

than you'd ever back in a minute she'll start quoting ralph waldo emerson that

is a lousy thing to say you've got nothing to do with the war maybe that's

why we're on this ship because we're not good enough to fight because our glands

don't secrete enough adrenaline or our great great grandmothers were afraid of

the dark or something. What is it you want to be, Doug? A hero?

Hero, Doc? You haven't heard a word I've said.

Look, Doc, the war's way out there and I'm here? Well, I don't want to be here.

I want to be out there.

I'm sick and tired of being a lousy spectator.

I just happen to believe in this thing and I want to feel I'm good enough to be

in it. Good enough, Doug? You're good enough?

Just that you haven't the opportunity.

That's mostly what makes physical heroism opportunity.

It's a reflex.

I think that 75 out of 100 young males have that reflex.

You take any one of them, say even Frank Thurlow Pulver here, put him into a B-29

over Japan, do you know what you'd have?

No, I don't, Doctor. You'd have Pulver the Congressional Medal of Honor winner.

Pulver, who single-handed shot down 23 attacking Zeros.

Pulver, who with his bare hands held together the severed wing stretch of his

plane. And with his bare feet, successfully landed his mortally wounded

plane on his home field.

It's reflex.

It's like the knee jerk.

Strike the patella tendon of any human being and you produce the knee jerk.

Look.

What's the matter, Doc?

Nothing. But stay out of B-29s, Frank, my boy.

You made your point very vividly, Doc.

But I still want to get in this thing.

And I'm going to keep on sending in these letters until I do.

Yes, I know you are, Doc. I haven't got much time.

That task force I saw was on its way to start our last big push in the Pacific.

I'm going to catch it.

LCM's coming alongside.

Will Mr.

Roberts report topside immediately?

Mr. Roberts, topside.

Doc, what are you going to give Doug for his birthday?

I hadn't thought of giving him anything.

I'm going to show him he's got old Pulver figured out all wrong.

What does that look like to you, Doc?

Just what it is, the cardboard center of rolled toilet paper. I suppose it

doesn't look like a firecracker.

Not a bit like a firecracker. And I suppose that doesn't look like a fuse.

Looks like a piece of string. Uh-huh. Well, you just wait till old Pulver gets

through with it, boy. I am gonna get me some black powder from that gunner's

mate, and I'm gonna... Oh, no, sir. No, sir. This is not gonna be any peanut of

a firecracker.

I'm gonna pack that thing solid with that stuff they use to blow up bridges.

Fulminator mercury.

And, boy, on the night of Doug's birthday, I'm gonna throw that under the

old man's bunk, and bam, boy!

Bam!

It is I, Anson Pulver. I just threw the firecracker onto your stinkin' bunk.

Oh, Doug, the captain wants you to hang on to whatever fresh fruit you have

left. Wants it for his own mess.

Okay, Tom.

And you better get braced for a storm, Mr. Roberts.

Dolan took in your letter a while back.

Stand by the bow line.

Ready to cast off.

You fellas squared away?

Yeah, thanks, Lieutenant.

Say, you wouldn't want to swap movies, would you?

Sure. What you got?

Hoot Gibson and the sheriff's daughter.

Shovel.

LCM number two, come alongside.

Hey, Chief!

Cocker just passed out.

Get him up here.

Give him to me here.

Easy,

boy. Easy.

It's murder down there, Mr. Roberts.

Can't we take our shirts off?

Sure, take them off.

Kennedy, give Mannion a hand. Get him back to sickbay.

Go on, take your shirts off.

Thank you, sir, Mr. Roberts.

On the M boat! Watch it!

Dottie, get a fender over. Watch it!

The captain wants to see you on the bridge, Mr. Roberts. Tell him I'm busy.

Slam her.

Give him a hand on that line.

Watch it!

This is what they want, Mr. Roberts.

One ton dry stores, one gross dungarees, 20 cartons toothpaste, one quarter ton

frozen food, fresh fruit if available.

Scratch that.

They've been out two months.

No fresh fruit in two months? No, sir.

Give him a couple of crates of oranges, compliments of the captain.

Sling ready, sir.

All right, take it away.

All right, mister.

We'll have this out right here and now.

What do you mean?

Telling me you're too busy. We were having trouble with the M-boat, Captain.

He didn't want me to leave the deck with a ship coming in on us. When I tell you

I want to see you, I mean now, mister.

I mean jump.

Understand? Yes, sir. I'll remember that next time. You better remember.

You think you're pretty cute with this letter, don't you?

Trying to get me in bad with the Admiral.

No, I'm not, Captain.

What do you mean writing disharmony aboard this ship?

Because it's true, Captain.

Any disharmony aboard this ship is my own doing.

That's true, too, Captain.

And it ain't gonna be in any letter that leaves this ship.

Any criticism of this ship stays on this ship.

I got a good reputation with the Admiral, and I ain't gonna lose it on

the count of any letter that's written by some smart aleck college officer.

Now, you retype this, see?

And cut out that disharmony crack, and I'll send it in.

But this is the last one.

Understand? Captain, every man in the Navy has the right to send in a request

for transfer. No one can change the wording.

That's the Navy regulations.

How about that, Dolan?

That's what it says in the book, sir.

Well, it's a stupid regulation.

And we wouldn't stand for it in the Merchant Marine, I can tell you.

All right.

I'll send this one in, just as it is.

but disapproved, like I always do.

But there's one thing I don't have to send, and that's a letter that hasn't

been written.

And, mister, I'm telling you here and now, you ain't gonna write any more.

You bring me one more, and you'll regret it the rest of your days.

You've got a job right here.

And, mister, you ain't never gonna get off this ship.

Get on with your work.

Where are your shirts?

Where are your shirts?

Captain, one of the... Shut up!

Answer me. Where are your shirts?

Get those shirts on and be quick about it.

I'm sorry. Put your shirts on.

Just one minute, mister.

Who's captain of this vessel?

That is the rankest piece of insubordination I ever seen.

You've been getting pretty smart lately, buttering up to Mr. Roberts here, but

this time you have gone too far, and I'm making you a little promise.

I am never going to forget this, and as a starter, you're on report.

Every one of you who appeared on deck without a shirt, On report!

Captain, you're not putting these men on report.

What do you mean I'm not? I'm responsible. I gave them permission.

You disobeyed my standing order?

Thanks a million for the fresh fruit, Lieutenant.

You gave that man oranges?

Yes, sir. I'm afraid I did.

Ten days!

You just got yourself ten days in your quarters.

Ten days!

Very well, Captain. Do you relieve me here?

You heard me. You get to your cabin before I make it 20 days.

Another airboat coming alongside, Mr. Roberts. You want to pull it or stop it?

I've been relieved, Chief.

Where do you think you're going?

To my room, Captain, for 10 days. Or was it 20? I'll tell you when to get to your

cabin. Get back to your job.

Captain, you told me I... Never mind what I told you.

I'm telling you.

Who's that officer? You boy!

Yes, you. Come here.

Are you one of my officers?

Yes, sir.

What's your name again?

Henson Pulver, sir.

I'm glad to see that someone aboard this vessel knows how to salute.

Pulver.

How is it I don't see you around much, Pulver?

I've often wondered the same thing myself, sir.

What's your job, Pulver?

Officer in charge of laundry and morale, sir.

How long have you been aboard, Pulver?

Fourteen months, sir.

Fourteen months?

Oh, spend most of your time in the laundry, huh?

Well, yes, sir. Most of the time.

Yes, sir. Well, you do a very good job, Pulver. Thank you, sir. Except for one

thing. Sir?

I don't like starch in my pajamas.

You'll watch out for that, won't you, Pulver? Yes, sir.

Fine. Well, you're doing very good work, Pulver.

Hey, uh, you must come to my cabin sometime and have dinner.

Oh, boy. Cut it out. Cut it out, Doug. Now, knock it off.

Oh, cut it out. He's got a nerve.

Wait till next week, Doug. You just wait. Wait till next week. He gets his

line for you. Wait and see.

Dog, I'm gonna get some starch.

You know, some of that real thick starch, like they use on nurses'

uniforms.

If I could be with you, I'd love you strong. If I could be with you, I'd love

you long.

I want you to know I wouldn't go.

And when old Robert says that, I thought the captain was gonna lose his mind.

Say nothing, Stanso, Robert. He's a...

Nice going, Mr. Roberts. It was really beautiful the way you read the old man

off. You gonna send in another letter next week, Mr. Roberts? He sure is. And

it's my turn to shove it right under the old man's nose, huh, Mr. Roberts? Yeah,

but you got a promotion coming up, haven't you? Yeah, but could he stop

that or something?

Promotion? This is Mr. Roberts. You think he gives a good hoot about another

lousy stripe?

Yeah, that's it.

We gotta write a real hot one next week, huh, Mr. Roberts? We'll use asbestos

paper. Yeah.

He'll fix the old man's clock.

You wait. Yeah.

All men who have not been put on report for three weeks can now go

swimming for ten minutes.

That is all.

Oh, you don't mind me barring your binoculars, do you, Doug?

It's okay, Frank. Will they get in your way?

Now hear this.

Now hear this.

Station launch coming alongside.

She's here. She's here. Now you guys stay away from that cabin, you hear?

Permission to come aboard, sir? Where is the skipper?

I don't mind asking him.

Request permission to come aboard, sir. Yeah, well, permission granted.

Hop aboard.

Hi.

Request permission to come aboard, sir.

Huh? Uh, permission... Request permission to come aboard, sir.

Request permission to come aboard, sir.

Request permission to come aboard, sir.

Request permission to come aboard, sir.

Now, that's all.

Cubina had to wash her hair, but she'd just love to come another time.

Well, uh, how would you girls like to sort of look around the ship while the

lieutenant and I discuss a little business? Uh-uh.

Hey, point the noises!

Well, I wouldn't think of leaving them unprotected. You know, right this way.

Just pardon me. Right up here. There you are.

That's it. There we are. Right here. Now, this is Doug.

Girls, Mr. Roberts.

Hi. Yeah, and he's my... Ensign Palmer here is executive officer.

What's your job?

Laundry and morale officer.

Glad to have you aboard.

Oh, are you laundry and morale?

So am I.

Hey, well, then, listen, Doug, why don't you just take the girls off somewhere

and tell them all about it, huh? Gee, I wish I could, Frank, but I got to clean

up. I did a lot of laundry today.

Sure.

Maybe Doc will show them surgery.

Uh, oh, Doc, oh, yeah, but girls, this is our surgeon, Doc.

Yeah, and you just go right off with Doc. Well, don't let the gray hair and

the baggy eyes bother you. He's very likable. Great sense of humor, Doc.

Yeah.

I'd be delighted to take these young ladies to the medical profession on my

surgery, but unfortunately, we haven't had a chance to clean up since our last

enemy action.

Come on, let's see the ship.

Hi. Hi.

Hi.

Uh,

Flemish up the lines after, will you, Donnie? What?

Yeah, new man.

More salt, Cookie.

Put some more salt there.

Now, girls, up here is where we have the... Uh, anchor. Follow me right up

here, girls.

Fletcher it.

Hello, men, as you were.

Girls, this is the, uh, and that's a gun. Oh, a mess. Is this the pup deck?

Hey, you boys must be the lookouts. Could I buy one? Oh, sorry, sir. Uh, the

top secret. Yeah, top, top secret. Captain's orders, miss. You know, uh,

bifocal. Oh, well, I can make an exception in your case.

Thank you.

Hey, Steph, look at the fish jumping over there, huh?

It's a whale. A real interesting cloud for me. You can see your hospital right

from over the rail here. Why, thank you.

Glasses. Well, you certainly can see Cobina.

Lieutenant, we gotta get back and hang those window curtains right away.

Ten hut!

Fight haste!

I was just getting the hang of this thing, too.

Yeah, now we got nothing to look forward to.

Just that same cruddy island.

Look, you gotta rub it in. Why don't you shut up? You gonna make me?

Shut up, Insignia. How did you find out? Oh, we seen him taking a bath. Through

this glass, Mr. Roberts.

We could see all of them. You heard what she said.

They're gonna hang some curtains. Yeah.

Them nurses was pretty to look at.

Well, they got a ten-minute boat ride. You still got ten minutes.

Yeah, but it wouldn't be any fun when you know you're gonna be rushed.

This is the first real good day this bucket's ever had.

But it's all over now.

Well, maybe you got time then to listen to a little piece of news.

When, in all respects, ready for sea, honor about 1,600 a day...

The AK-601 will proceed at 10 knots via points X-Ray, Yolk, and Zebra to Elysium

Island, arriving there in seven days and reporting to the port director for cargo

assignment.

During its stay in Elysium, the ship will make maximum use of the

recreational facilities of this port.

But that means liberty.

That don't mean liberty, Mr. Roberts. That's exactly what it means. Somebody

must have been drunk to send us to a liberty port. The old man seen them

orders? Saw them before I did. But ill-ism, where's that? Yeah, where's

that, Mr. Roberts? Polynesium is the largest of the limbo islands. It's often

referred to as the Polynesian paradise.

Vanilla, sugar, cocoa, coffee, copra, mother-of-pearl, phosphates, and rum are

the chief exports.

Rum? Did you hear that? Shut up!

Elysium City, its capital, is a beautiful metropolis of palm-lined

boulevards, handsome public buildings, and colorful stucco homes.

Since 1900, its population has remained remarkably constant at approximately 30

,000. Wait till we get there!

Go on, Mr. Roberts, go on. There's a lot of stuff about age to navigation.

Elysium Harbor, offering excellent anchorage and docking facilities.

is surrounded on three sides by beautiful green cloud covered hills.

The natives are noted for their congeniality and hospitality.

is a nice boy.

Get him up!

Chief, will you tie this?

It's been so long, I sort of forgot.

It's all right.

What are you gonna do when you get ashore, Bookster?

Kid will probably go to the first saloon.

Ice cream saloon, eh, Booksy?

I haven't thought much about it.

I got my camera ma sent me.

Guess I'll just wander around.

Here.

Hey,

Lindstrom.

I got good news for you.

You can take off them Liberty Whites.

I ain't got the duty tonight.

That's right. You and Mr. Roberts got the duty tonight.

Now hear this.

Here we go.

Here we go.

This is the captain speaking.

I just found out that there's men on this vessel expecting Liberty.

Now, I don't know how this rumor got around, but I'd like to clear it up

right now.

On account of cargo requirements... and security conditions which have just come

to my personal attention, there will be no liberty while we're in this here

port.

That is all.

Come

in,

Mr. Roberts.

28 seconds.

Pretty good time.

You see, I've been expecting you. Okay, how about it? When does this crew get

liberty? In the first place, just kind of hold your tongue.

I'm still captain here.

When are you going to let this crew go ashore?

I'm not.

It was not my idea coming to this liberty port.

It seems one of my officers arranged it with a certain port director.

Gave him a bottle of scotch whiskey, compliments of the captain.

The port director was kind enough to send me a little thank you note.

along with our order.

Sit down, Mr. Roberts.

Now, I admit I was a little provoked about not being consulted.

Then I got to thinking, maybe we ought to come to this port so as you and me

could have a little talk. All right, take it out on me, but not on the men.

Don't you hear that music? Don't you know it's tearing those guys apart?

They're breakable, Captain, I promise you.

Now, you listen to me.

I've got two things I want to show you.

That is the cap of a full commander.

I'm going to wear that cap someday, and you're going to help me.

Now, it won't do any harm to tell you that you helped me win that palm tree by

working cargo.

Now, don't let this go to your head.

Well, when Admiral Finchley awarded me that palm tree, he said, you've got a

good cargo officer, Morton. Keep them at it.

You're going places.

And I went right out and bought that hat.

And nobody ain't gonna stand between me and that hat.

Certainly not you.

Now, last week, it was agreed that there was to be no more of these disharmony

letters. I didn't say that.

Now, what do I find on my chest this morning?

Another one.

It says here, friction between me and the commanding officer.

That ain't going in, mister.

How are you going to stop it, Captain?

I ain't.

You are.

Just how much do you want this crew to have a liberty?

Enough to stop this friction?

Enough to stop writing letters ever.

Because that's the only way this crew was going to get ashore.

This day or any other day.

Now we've had our little chat.

What do you say?

How did you get in the Navy?

How did you get on our side?

Ah, you ignorant.

Arrogant, ambitious, keeping 62 men in prison. Because you got a palm tree for

the work they did.

I don't know which I hate worse, you or that other malignant growth that stands

outside your door. How did you ever get command of a ship?

I realize in wartime they have to scrape the bottom of the barrel. Where'd they

ever scrape you up? There's just one thing left for you, mister.

A general court-martial. That suits me fine. Court-martial me. You've got it.

I'm asking for it. If I can't get transferred, I'll get court-martialed

off. I'm fed up.

But you'll need a witness.

Call your messenger. I'll say it all over again in front of him.

Go on, call him.

You want me to call him?

You're a smart boy, Roberts.

But I know how to take care of smart boys.

I hate your guts, you smart college guys.

I've been seeing your kind around since I was ten years old, working as a

busboy.

Oh, busboy?

It seems my friend has thrown up on the table.

Clean up that best boy, will you?

And then when I went to see as a steward, people poking at you with

umbrellas. Oh, boy!

You, boy!

Careful with that luggage, boy!

Well, I took it.

I took it for years.

But I don't have to take it anymore.

There's a war on.

And I'm captain of this vessel.

And now you can take it for a change.

The worst thing I can do to you is to keep you right here, mister.

And here is where you're going to stay.

Now, get out!

What do you want for liberty, Captain?

You are through writing letters, ever.

Okay.

That's not all.

You're through talking back to me in front of the crew.

When I give an order, you jump.

Is that all, Captain?

No.

Anyone know you're in here?

No one.

Good.

And you're not to go blabbing this around to anyone, ever.

Might not sound so good.

Besides, I don't want you to take credit for getting this... You think I'm doing

this for credit?

You think I'd let anyone know about this?

I've got to make sure. Well, you've got my word, that's all.

Your word, yeah.

You college boys make such a great show of keeping your word.

All right.

Now, hear this.

This is the captain speaking.

I've had further word on the subject of liberty.

It gives me great pleasure to announce liberty for the starboard section

commencing.

The whole crew or there's no deal.

I mean it.

Correction.

Liberty for the entire crew will commence immediately.

I repeat.

You don't have to tell them again. Liberty. They heard you.

Some of those crazy lugs.

Just listen to them.

Got a bunch of real beauties for you this time. Can they walk?

Walk? Some of them can't even crawl.

Colonel Middleton presents his compliments to the captain, sir, and

wishes him to know that these men made a shambles of the colonel's testimonial

dinner dance.

You men crashed a dance for army personnel?

Yes, sir, and they made us feel unwelcome.

Oh, the army started a fight, huh? Oh, no, sir. We started it. And we finished

it. Hey, tell Mr.

Roberts how many of you army bums is in the hospital.

38 soldiers of the United States Army have been hospitalized.

And the colonel himself has a very bad bruise on his left shin.

That's not all, Lieutenant.

There were young ladies present, 50 of them, from the finest families of

Elysium.

Well, sir?

Well?

Two of those young women were somewhat... mall.

One of them actually got a black eye.

Six others had their clothes torn from them.

They ran screaming into the night.

They haven't been heard from since.

What are you going to do about it, Lieutenant?

Well, I'm due to be relieved here in 15 minutes. I'd be glad to lead a search

party.

No, sir.

The army will take charge of that end.

Colonel Middleton will want to know what punishments you're going to give these

men. Well, you tell him I'm sure our captain will think of something. What,

sir? That's all, Sergeant.

Thank you, sir.

Good night.

So long, you guys. See you around, ladies.

Thanks,

huh?

Well, what have you got to say for yourselves?

Okay if we go ashore again?

What do you say, Doc?

Yeah, Doc!

Anybody got a fractured skull? No.

They passed the physical.

Go on, take a shower and get into some clothes.

Hey, we just got time to get back to the deck!

I'm drunk as a ghost.

Show him how drunk I am.

Mr. Roberts, when I first saw her, she was eating.

And you know, she used to eat her way into my heart.

She was eating a little old palm tree.

There you are, kid.

Ciao.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

What's her name?

She's got a nameplate.

Her name is... Property of.

What's her last name?

Her last name?

Rare Animal Wentworth.

Okay, Dylan, hit the sack. I'll take care of her. Okay, Mr. Roberts.

See that she gets a good square meal.

Oh, come on, baby.

Hey, Kennedy, where you been?

Okay, okay, you're relieved.

The rest of the mission goes short, sir.

Lieutenant, did one of you men turn up with her?

Oh, there she is.

Thanks. Come on, come on. Your papa's over there worried about you.

Say, Mr. Roberts, where's your relief? Ah, he'll be along...

cocky about it. Am I looking cocky?

Maybe it's because for the first time since I've been on this ship, I'm seeing

a crew.

What do you think you've been living with all this time?

The 62 separate guys.

There's a big difference, Doc. Now in one night, these guys are bound

together.

Doc, I think now maybe they're strong enough to stand all the miserable,

endless days ahead of us.

I only hope I'm strong enough.

Doug?

Tomorrow, you and I are going over there and take advantage of the groundwork

that's been laid tonight.

You and I are going to give ourselves a liberty.

Hey, get a load of pull.

Hello, Frank.

How was your liberty?

I'm telling you true, I'd be anything but blue if I could be...

You want to know your post?

Officer of the deck, I hope you don't mind, but I've stationed my men along

your starboard side.

I'm sorry, but this ship is restricted for the rest of its stay in Elysium.

Your captain is to report to the island commander at 7 o'clock this morning.

I recommend that he's there on time.

Admiral's a pretty tough cookie when he's man.

Madder none I ever seen him.

What in particular did this?

Well, a little while ago, six men from your ship broke into the home of the

French colonial governor.

Started throwing things through a plate glass living room window.

We found some of the things on the lawn.

Large world globe, small love seat, a lot of books.

Bust a ball, Zack.

The French rider.

We also found an army private, first class, who was unconscious at the time.

He claims they threw him, too.

Through the window?

That's right.

It seems he took him there for a little joke. He didn't tell him it was the

governor's house.

He told him it was a...

Well, what do we call in Alabama?

Yeah, we call it the same thing in Nebraska.

Well, that's about all, Lieutenant.

If it makes you feel any better, Admiral Wentworth says this is the worst ship

he's ever seen in his entire naval career.

Good night, Lieutenant.

Good night.

Bringing the gangway, single up all lines. We've been kicked out of port.

Hooks ran aboard, sir. He didn't come back last night. Hooks, sir? No, sir.

Get that gangway up, mister!

And I mean now! Shaft! Yes, sir.

Hooks, sir!

I'm surprised at you, Bookster.

Yes, sir. So am I.

Where'd you meet her, anyway?

At a church social.

All night?

We went for a walk down on the beach, sir.

We sat there and counted the stars.

Honest, sir.

That's all.

You better get below.

Yes, sir.

All prisoner accounted for, sir.

Right here, mister.

Well, I guess you're mighty proud of yourselves, getting me kicked out of

port that way.

Well, we are going to erase this bluff from my record if we have to work 24

hours a day.

Right, Mr. Roberts?

Yes, sir.

We are going to move more cargo than we ever moved before.

Right, Mr. Roberts?

Yes, sir.

And Mr. Roberts is going to see to it that you men toe the line at all times.

That's right, too.

Isn't it, mister?

That's right, sir.

And you know as well as I do that Mr. Roberts is a man... who keeps his word

and roberts you do a good job and one of these days there may be a promotion in

it for you an extra little bar on that collar that would be all right wouldn't

it mister wouldn't that be all right roberts

yes sir if you say so you just heard me say so

take over

See, they work up a sweat.

I just gave an order, and I ain't had no answer.

I'm waiting.

Aye, aye, sir.

That's better.

That's more like it.

Deck division, break out the chippers and scrapers and get after that rust.

Engineering division, air bedding, fall out.

What's he taking all that gump for?

Yes, sir. No, sir.

Aye, aye, sir.

Hey, killer!

Do you really think he's bucking for a promotion?

Who, Mr. Roberts?

He's just tired, that's all.

Promotion. Yeah, that's right. He's just tired.

Oh, Mr. Roberts, I got something here. A little love letter from the Bureau came

in just this morning.

Hey, get a load of this.

To all ships and stations, heightened war offensive has created urgent need

aboard combat ships for experienced officers.

All commanding officers are hereby directed to forward with their

endorsement... All applications for transfer from officers with 24 months

sea duty. You got 29 months.

Does that put old stupid behind the eight ball or don't it?

Here's your letter, Mr. Roberts, all typed up and ready to go. Just the old

John Hancock.

Hey, go ahead, Mr. Roberts. I want to hear him explode.

Yeah, he'll go right through to the overhead, Mr. Roberts.

I want to look it over first, Dolan.

What's to look over? It's just a standard form. Dolan, I'm not going to

stand here and argue with you. I told you I wanted to look it over.

Now get back to your typewriter before I put you on report.

All right, don't just stand here.

There is no official announcement yet. The report that the war in Europe has

ended has come from only one correspondent.

It has not been confirmed by other correspondents or by Shave Headquarters.

But here is one highly intriguing fact.

That report has not been denied.

Turn that thing off, will you, Doc? Or in Shave Headquarters in Europe.

Doug ever said anything to you about wanting a promotion?

Of course not.

I doubt if he's even conscious of what rank he is. He never thinks about a

promotion. All he ever thinks about is the war news.

Anybody says he's bucking for another stripe is a dirty liar.

Who says he is?

Dan Cigna and Mannion, some of those other guys.

I heard them talking outside the porthole.

You know, talking loud on purpose so I'd hear them.

Must have guessed I was lying here in my sack.

What's happened to Doug anyway, Doc?

How would I know?

He's spoken about ten words to me in as many days.

I'll find out, though.

He won't talk, Doc.

I followed him all around the room this morning while he was shaving. I begged

him to talk to me.

I said, you're a fellow who needs a friend, boy, and here I am.

And what's all this trouble between you and the crew? You know, you tell me,

I'll fix it up like that.

Then I gave him a lot of good advice, you know, things like keep your chin up

and, you know, things like that. Well, you know what he did? He walked right

out of this room just as though I wasn't here. And I was here.

Mr. Roberts is turning out to be like an officer, ain't he?

Hey, boy, we thought you were up in the radio shack listening to the war news.

Don't you want to go out to the ward room and get a cup of coffee?

Yeah, sure. I'll go with you. No, I don't want to. You go ahead.

Will you get out anyway? I want to talk to Doc.

All right. I'm going for a cup of coffee.

No, I'm not. I'm going up the radio shack and listen to the war news. You're

not the only one interested.

See you later, Doc.

Doc.

Transfer me, will you?

Transfer me to the hospital in this next island. You can do it.

You don't need the captain's approval. Just put me ashore for examination.

Say there's something wrong with my eyes or my feet or my head, you can trump up

something.

What good would that do?

Plenty. I could lie around that hospital for a couple of weeks. The ship would

have sailed and I'd have missed it.

I'd be off this ship.

Will you do it, Doc?

Doug, what's really the matter?

I just put Dolan on report.

On report?

Why?

Because I gave him an order and he didn't carry it out fast enough to suit

me.

No, that's not true.

It's the war.

I heard the news.

The war was ending and I couldn't get to it.

There's Dolan giving me guff about something. All of a sudden, I hated it.

I hated all of them.

If they think I'm bucking for a promotion, if they think I'd walk ten

feet across the room to get anything from that captain, I'm through with the

whole ungrateful mob.

Does this crew owe you something?

What do you mean by that?

You talk as if they did.

That's exactly how I'm talking.

Doc, that shows you how far gone I am.

I've been blaming them for something that... What? Something what?

Doug, you've made some sort of an agreement with the captain, haven't you?

Agreement? I don't know what you mean.

Doc, turn on the radio. Turn it on.

This broadcast will bring you a special news flash.

The war is over in Europe. The war is over in Europe. Germany has surrendered

unconditionally to the Allied armies.

The surrender was signed in a schoolhouse in the city of Reims.

I would remind you that there's still a minor skirmish here in the Pacific.

I'll miss that, too.

But this is the greatest day in the world. We gotta celebrate.

How about it, Frank?

Yeah, Doug, we gotta celebrate.

What'll it be, alcohol and orange juice or orange juice and alcohol? No, Doc,

that's not good enough.

No, that's not good enough, Doc. We gotta think of something to lift this

ship right up out of the water and turn it around the other way.

Doug, Doc, I... You're gonna blow your lids when you hear this idea.

Oh, what a sweet idea.

You said I never finished anything I started. Oh, boy, you're wrong. Tonight

I started something I'm gonna finish it. Frank, wait a minute. What is it? A

firecracker. We're gonna heave a firecracker under that old man's bunk

and bam, bam, bam!

Wake up, you unpatriotic old slob. It's VE Day. Frank. Did you ever see such a

hand-painted, hand-packed firecracker in your life? Oh, Frank, that's the most

beautiful firecracker I ever saw in my life. But will it work? Sure it'll work.

Well, I think it will. Haven't you tested it, Frank? It's gotta work. It's

just gotta work. Take it down to the laundry. That's my laboratory.

I got all the makings down there. If this one works, I can make another one

in two minutes. Okay, Frank, take off. We'll wait here for you. Be sure you got

enough to make it loud. What do you use for powder?

Powder? This ain't no pop gun. It's a firecracker. I used fulminator mercury.

I'll be back in a minute.

Fulminator mercury? That stuff's murder.

Do you suppose he means it?

Ah, of course not.

Where would he get Fulminator Mercury?

I don't know. He's pretty resourceful.

Well, how about a little drink? Right.

Doc, I've been living with the genius.

This makes everything worthwhile. A whole year and a half he spent in his

bunk.

How else could you celebrate the... a firecracker into the old man's bunk?

To better days. Right.

And to a great American, Frank Thurlow Pulver.

Soldier, statesman, scientist, friend of the working girl.

What was that?

I don't know what it was, Captain, but I'll try and find out.

Hey there, up on the bridge.

Is there anything wrong up there?

stuff's terrific are you all right yeah i'm great gee you should have been there

you're not you're not burned or anything no but that laundry's kind of beat up

you know those laundry machines clear over the other side of the room now and

there's a new porthole in the starboard side the electric guy went right through

i guess a steam line must have busted or something i was up here and lathered oh

soap suds flying all around it was just it was absolutely beautiful. Well what

was it? Has anybody found out?

It was the laundry captain.

A steam line must have busted.

Any damage?

We can't get in there. The passageway is solid soap suds. Well tell those

men to be more careful.

Duty's clear.

What are we going to do now, Doug? We're going down and get the rest of your

stuff. You proved that at work you just hit the wrong target, that's all.

We're going to make another firecracker and put it where it really belongs.

All of my stuff was down in the laundry.

It all went up.

I'm sorry, Doug. I'm awful sorry.

That's okay, Frank.

You're not sore at me now, are you? What for?

Spoiling the celebration? Of course not.

It was a good idea, wasn't it, Frank? It was a great idea. I'm proud of you. It

just didn't work, that's all.

Where are you going, Doug? Out on deck.

I'll get cleaned up. I'll come with you, Doug. I'm going to turn in after that.

It's okay, Frank.

He was happy there for a minute. Did you hear him laughing?

Did you find out what's the matter with him?

He wouldn't tell me.

But I know one thing he's feeling tonight.

Much panic.

Tonight he feels as war is dying before he can get to it.

I let him down.

He wanted to celebrate, and I let him down.

We hope that the king and queen will come out. The crowd are cheering.

We hope to see their majesties. The color here is tremendous.

Everywhere, rosettes. Everywhere, gay, red, white, and blue hats.

Hey, what's all that jabbering on the radio?

I don't know. Something about the king and queen.

Historic May evening.

And although we celebrate with joyousness of heart... Steam line busted

in the laundry.

They're cleaning it up now. It ain't even worth going to see.

Come on, Dolan. Dolan will get you down.

Yeah, come on, Dolan.

Hey, what was them croquette things we had for Charon?

Nice red.

Good evening.

You fellas hear the news? The war's over in Europe.

Yes, sir, we heard. Sure.

Maybe somebody will get on the ball out here now.

Oh, Dolan, I... I guess I kind of blew my top.

I'm sorry, I'm ticking you off, report.

Whatever you want, sir.

Well, guess I'll let the old sack.

Yeah, me too.

Yeah, I think so.

See you later.

Didn't realize how late it was.

Yeah.

I talked to you about 35 minutes ago. The picture has changed a little bit

here in Times Square.

Da-da-da

Sound the general alarm!

Sound the general alarm!

He didn't say abandon ship.

All right. Now, wait a minute. Wait. Laundry detail report to forward gun.

Laundry detail report to forward. What happened? I'm coming. Where's the gun?

Hey, Insignia. Yeah.

Are you supposed to be up there?

Yeah. We was up here last year.

Hey, Dowdy, where's my battle station? I don't know where your battle station is.

Look around.

Look around.

Ask a man politely where his battle station is, and he says, look around.

Engine room manned and ready. All battle stations manned and ready.

All except mine!

All pilot stations manned and ready, Captain.

All right.

Who did it?

You are going to stand sweating at those battle stations until someone confesses.

It's an insult to the honor of this ship.

The symbol of our cargo record has been destroyed, and I am going to find out

who did it if it takes all night.

Symbol of our cargo record?

What's that?

I don't know.

Devanowski, find some battle station!

The Pontry is gone!

Hey, hey, come on, come on! The Pontry is gone! The Pontry is gone! The Pontry

is gone!

Here.

Read me that muster list.

Abernathy. No, not Abernathy.

Baker. No.

Come here.

Come here. Come on. Come on.

Come on.

Charlie.

Charlie.

Watch. Watch him, darling. Watch him, darling.

O'Neal. No, not O'Neal.

Pulver.

Pulver.

Pulver wouldn't have the guts.

Go on, go on.

Roberts.

That's the one.

Get him up here. Get him up here right now. Get him up here.

Mr. Roberts will report to the captain's cabin on the double.

Mr.

Roberts will report to the captain's cabin on the double. Give me that.

Roberts, Roberts, you get up here in one quick hurry.

Roberts, get a move on.

I'll give you an order.

This is it!

You get a move on and get up here, but this is finally, finally the showdown.

We are going to have it out right here and now.

You hear, Roberts?

Get up here now!

You want to see me, Captain?

You did it.

Don't stand there and lie to me. Confess it.

Confess what, Captain? I don't know what you're talking about.

You know what I'm talking about because you did it.

You double-crossed me.

You've gone back on your word.

No, I haven't, Captain.

Oh, yes, you have.

Yes, you have.

I kept my part of the bargain. I gave this crew liberty.

I gave this crew liberty.

But you've gone back on your word.

You promised me on your word of honor.

I kept my word, Captain. I haven't written any more letters.

I'm not talking about your stinky, rotten letters.

I'm talking about what you did tonight.

Tonight? I don't understand you, Captain. What did you think I did

tonight? You know what you did.

You stabbed me in the back!

You stabbed me in the... Will

the doctor please report

to the captain's cabin on the double?

Will the doctor please report to the captain's cabin on the double?

Hey Lindstrom, where's the old man?

He's sitting in a chair leading way forward.

What's the doc doing?

Doc's holding the wastebasket.

What wastebasket? The one the old man's got his hat in.

Whoops, there he goes again.

They got him to the couch.

That's it.

Now, we must have let ourselves get angry, Captain.

We know that, don't we?

Look out, here they come.

We'll not need the stretcher now.

Sorry.

Chief.

Yes, sir.

Pass the word to the men to secure from General Quarters. Aye, aye, sir.

See you later.

Now hear this. Now hear this.

Secure from general quarters.

Good night, Mr. Roberts.

Good night, Reber. Good night, Mr. Roberts.

Good night, Wiley. Good night, Mr. Roberts.

Good night, Lindstrom.

Good night, Mr. Roberts.

Good night, Mr. Roberts.

Good night, Mr. Roberts. Good night, Kennedy.

Good night, Mr. Roberts.

Good night, Mr. Roberts.

Is that my daughter?

Okay, Mr. Roberts, I'll take these down to the gangway. The boat from the island

should be out here any minute for you. I'll let you know.

Thanks, Gerard. Never thought you'd be taking this trip, did you? I'll be off

this bucket before I even wake up.

Are they flying you all the way to the living room?

I don't know. Dispatch said transfer. Travel by air if possible. I guess it's

all the way, though. They're landing planes at Okinawa now. That's where my

can's probably running around.

Okinawa? You be mighty careful, Doug boy.

Okay, Frank.

Doc, I even got a destroyer.

The Livingston. I know a guy in the Livingston. He don't think it's so hot.

Here you are, Mr. Roberts. I typed up three copies of the radio dispatch.

I have to keep one copy, and here's two for you.

You are now officially detached from this here bucket.

Let me be the first.

Thanks, Dolan.

Dolan, how about these orders? I haven't sent in a letter for a month. Listen,

Mr. Roberts, I can tell you exactly how that happened. You see, those guys in

Washington need men awful bad for combat duty.

So they started looking through some of the old letters and come across one of

yours. Listen, Mr.

Roberts, we can't stand here beating our gums. And the old man says, if he ain't

out of here in one hour, I'll throw him off.

Is that all he said? That's all he said.

After fighting this thing for two years, you'd think he'd say more than that.

Guard, I don't want no man closer than ten feet.

Understand? What's that?

A new botanical garden. Ain't you heard?

No. When we anchored this morning, he sent Olsen out with a special detail,

dug up a new palm tree.

He's already set a 24-hour watch on that new baby with orders to shoot to kill.

Oh, that reminds me, Ensign Palmer, the captain wants to see you right away.

What about?

I don't know, sir.

I'll come back to say goodbye later, Mr. Roberts.

Come on, Ensign Palmer. Yeah, I'll bet those guys down in the laundry starched

his pajamas again.

You're happy about it, too, aren't you, Doc?

Oh, I think it's the only thing for you.

What do you think of the crew now, Doug?

We're all right. I think they're nice guys, all of them.

Mm-hmm.

How do you think they feel about you?

Oh, they like me well enough till the next guy comes along.

You don't think you're necessary to them, huh? Doc, no officer's necessary

to a crew.

Are you going to leave this ship believing that? That's nothing against

them, Doc. They're too busy looking out for themselves to worry about anybody

else.

Well, take a good, deep breath, Buster.

What do you think got you, your orders?

Prayer and fasting?

Sending in enough box tops?

What Dolan said, one of my old letters turned up.

Bunk.

This crew got you transferred.

They were so busy thinking about themselves that they took a chance of

landing in prison for five years, every one of them.

You couldn't send in a letter for transfer, so they sent one in for you.

They knew the captain wouldn't sign it approved, so they didn't bother him.

They signed it for him.

Doc, what do you mean? They forged the captain's name? That's it, exactly.

It's quite a thing to see, Doug.

The captain's name signing contest. Every man in the crew trying his best to

copy that rabbit little scrawl of the captain's.

Then the judges decided the winner.

At the time, there was some criticism of their decision on the grounds that the

judges were drunk.

But apparently, from the results, they chose pretty well.

How'd you find out about it, Doc?

Well, it's a great honor.

I'm the only officer aboard who knows.

I was a contestant.

I was also a judge.

This double honor was accorded me because of my character, charm,

good looks, and because the medical department contributed four gallons of

grain alcohol to the contest.

Who won?

Who signed it?

I'm not at liberty to say.

Basically, they all did.

And with just one idea in mind.

To do something for Mr.

Roberts.

Well, she hadn't told me, Doc.

Makes me look pretty silly after what I just said.

But I didn't mean it, Doc.

I was afraid to say what I really feel.

I love those guys.

I think they're the greatest guys on this earth.

And all of a sudden, I feel there's something terribly wrong about leaving

them.

Doc, what can I say to them?

Nothing. You don't know about it.

After you're safely aboard your new ship, I'm supposed to write and tell you

about it.

And at the bottom of the letter, I'm supposed to say, thanks for the liberty,

Mr. Roberts.

Thanks for everything.

I'm the new cargo officer.

And that ain't all. I gotta have dinner with him tonight.

He likes me.

Come in.

What's that?

Fire and rescue party. Heard you had a fire in here.

No, but as long as you're here... Well, we got a false alarm, then.

In that case, we might as well drink this stuff.

What's in that?

New batch of jungle juice?

Yeah. in the handy new portable container.

Everybody loaded?

All right, you guys, you can come in now.

Open it.

What is it, Doug?

It's a palm tree, see?

It was Dowdy's idea, sir.

Manion made it. He cut out a sheet brass down in the machine shop.

Manion drilled the words on it, too.

Stefanowski thought up the words.

Booksy gets credit for the ribbon from a box of candy he got from his mother.

Read the words, Mr. Roberts.

Order of...

Order

to the palm.

To Lieutenant J.G. Douglas Roberts for action against the enemy.

Above and beyond the call of duty.

Looks very nice, but I think you got the wrong guy.

We know, sir.

But we'd like you to have it anyway.

Okay, I'll keep it.

Stefanowski thought up the words.

Fine word.

The boat's here, Mr. Roberts.

I put your gear in. They want to shove off right away.

We haven't had our drink yet. No, sir.

We won't get any jungle juice aboard that destroyer, Mr. Roberts.

That's right, Dolly.

Bye, Doc.

Bye, Doug. And thanks, Doc.

Okay. Bye, Frank.

Remember, I'm counting on you.

You got it. Mail call will be on the forward hatch immediately.

Mannion.

Mannion.

Newspapers. Eight weeks old.

Pulver, pulver, pulver.

Ensign Pulver. We just heard. No movies again tonight.

Why not?

I said we was making too much noise.

We wasn't making too much noise, Ensign Pulver. Talk to him, will you, Ensign

Pulver? What, me?

Talk to the captain.

Book,

sir. Yes, sir. Thank you.

Lindstrom. Yes, sir.

Nolan. Here, sir.

Stepanowski. Right here, sir.

My mother. All she ever says is, stay away from Japan.

What's your news, Doc?

My wife got some new wallpaper for the living room.

Hmm.

Pretty.

Alabama.

Well, I shall read that one later.

Hey, Doc, this is from Doug.

Yeah? What does he say?

Hey, you guys, want to hear a letter from Mr. Roberts?

Yeah, sure thing.

Dear Frank, this will be short and sweet

as we're shoving off in about two minutes.

This was dated three weeks ago.

Does he say where he is?

Yeah, he says my guess about the location of this ship is exactly right.

Well, that means he's around Okinawa, all right.

Anyone else?

He met Fornell.

You know, that friend of mine got him Fornell and went to college with?

Well, that's what he says.

Fornell says that you and he used to load up your car with liquor in Omaha

and then sell it at an indecent profit to the fraternity boys at Iowa City. How

about that?

We did, too.

This part is for Doc.

I've been... Go ahead and read it. It's for both of us.

For Doc.

I've been aboard this destroyer for two weeks now, and we've already been

through four air attacks.

I'm in the war at last, Doc.

I've caught up with that task force that passed me by.

I'm glad to be here.

I had to be here, I guess.

But I'm thinking now of you, Doc, and you, Frank, and Dolan, and Dowdy, and

Insigna, and everyone else on that bucket.

All the guys everywhere who sailed from...

tedium to apathy and back again with an occasional side trip to monotony

this is a tough crew on here and they have a wonderful battle record but i've

discovered doc that the unseen enemy of this war is the boredom that eventually

becomes a faith and therefore a terrible sort of suicide and i know now

that the ones who refuse to surrender to it are the strongest of all.

Right now, I'm looking at something that's hanging over my desk, a

preposterous hunk of brass attached to the most bilious piece of ribbon I've

ever seen.

I'd rather have it than the Congressional Medal of Honor.

It tells me what I'll always be proudest of, that at a time in the world when

courage counted most, I lived among 62 brave men.

So, Doc, and especially you, Frank, don't let those guys down.

Of course, I know that by this time they must be very happy because the captain's

overhead is filled with marbles.

And, uh... And here comes the mail orderly. This has to go now. I'll finish

it later.

Meanwhile, you guys can write, too, can't you?

Doug.

May I see that, Frank?

Hey, this one's from 4-0.

I'd rather have it than the Congressional Medal of Honor.

Well, I'm glad he found that out.

What's the matter, Frank?

What's the matter?

Mr. Roberts is dead.

This is from Fornell.

They took a Jap suicide plane. It killed everybody in a twin 40 battery and went

right on through and killed Doug.

Some other officer in the ward room.

They were drinking coffee when it hit.

I have that.

I'd like to post it for the crew.

No.

Post this instead.

It's theirs.

Yes, who is it?

Captain, it is I, Ensign Pulver, and I just threw your stinkin' palm tree

overboard.

Now, what's all this crud about no movie tonight?