Original subtitles

Take the trip, it's a blast, a new beginning A rollercoaster, flying,

zinging, zinging You know it's a smash, when it hits ya Gonna paint a picture, I

wanna come and get ya You wanna stop

I feel it'll be the centerfold for losers.

Not this year.

Sharks all the way.

Just because you skanks go all the way doesn't mean your team will.

Boys.

One,

two, three, four.

J to the E to the D to the S. Jets get out from east to west.

is shake your butts, cheer one-on-one for stupid sluts.

We're the Westville Sharks, and we got pipe.

We got what it takes to win this fight.

That's you skip, you go, you hold. These moves and motions leave us told.

Carson's captain of their team, a loser even in her dreams.

Works not at all, except one hit. She's a stuck-up, nasty, stupid little witch.

You don't think that you're ahead. Our mascot's blues will knock you dead.

It wasn't a nightmare.

Damn, we're gonna have some fun.

Fun? We are not here to have fun, Ruben. We're here to win. Do you think East

Coast is here to have fun? Hell no, it's no fun.

Okay, I won't use the F word anymore.

Look, this year we are taking the title and going on the world tour.

Hail to the year.

Let's bust some East Coast attitude.

Uh, reality check. The Jets have beat us three years in a row. What's your

problem, Doom Cookie? No problem.

Let the disemboweling begin.

Dibs on their entrails.

Cheer TV is live at the Hard Rock Hotel at Universal Orlando, and I'm here with

Pepper Driscoll and Vance Voorhees, owners of the two rival cheer camps.

Pepper, can you tell us a little bit about the All-Star Cheer Camp

Championships? I'd love to.

Well, this year is extra special because the winning squad will represent our

great nation on a cheer exhibition world tour. That's right. And my teams will

come in at least first and second place again.

Pepper's Camp has both champion squads that epitomize the clash in American

cheer styles.

In fact, last year, one of her squads, the East Coast Jets, with their

traditional cheer moves, narrowly defeated the West Coast Sharks, another

one of Pepper's squads, shown here with their new wave dance stylings inspired

by music video choreography.

In the cheer world, the controversy is brewing over what exactly defines

cheerleading, precision or flavor.

Speaking of controversy, Vance, is the bad blood between War Camp Victory and

Pepper's Camp Spirit Thunder related to your divorce?

Of course not. We're both professionals. We handle our craft seriously.

Which is why I can say that this year a Camp Victory team will vanquish all

comers. By vanquish, he means third again.

No. This year Camp Victory has a secret weapon.

Bull twinkle. You do not. We do, and I guess you're going to have to wait and

see. Well, we'll all see in this Saturday's World Cheer Exhibition right

here on Cheer TV.

Paps, we need to practice our home routine.

We just got here.

Yeah, and if you want to leave here winners, it's going to take practice,

practice, and more practice. And after that... Oh, my God.

Carson.

I'm, like, so glad you came back this year.

Hey, Brooke.

Of course we came back. After losing to us three years in a row, it's, like, so

brave. Yo, can we burn this East Coast trash?

You know what? They're not even worth it, Aisha.

Give it up, Brooke.

We're not going to play like that. Oh.

Oh, you mean, like, champions?

Yeah. Not really a thing, huh?

I think it's time for a little gorilla warfare.

Brooke, where are we going to find gorillas?

Just follow my lead.

like government chief. I need to get a rest.

I didn't know the government made sheep.

You better watch it.

Uh,

you go, girl.

You know what? I need to rework that transition anyway, so free time until

opening ceremonies.

Hey, are you okay?

I'm fine.

You kind of got skid marks.

Good. Now the police can track down the stroller.

Hey, why do I feel like I met you before?

I don't know, maybe in a prior life?

Well, I was thinking this one, but now that sounds whack.

So where are you from?

California. A place called Eden Hills.

You? Nowhere and everywhere.

You know, I'm an army brat.

I guess I'm just a regular brat.

I've never been out of the country.

We just moved back from London.

Really?

We're going there soon.

Oh, you're gonna love England.

You know me so well.

Oh, no doubt. Because, you know, in our prior life, when we were guards at

Buckingham Palace, you were the hottie wearing that bearskin hat.

Of course, all the guards were trying to hook up with you.

Oh, right. And let me guess, you defended my honor.

No, I was trying to get at you, too.

Hey,

you ever done the double dragon?

What?

Hey, hold up, Skids.

What if I want to see you again?

Number?

916-555-0190.

Cool. Now I got your number, Skids.

It's Carson.

It's Penn.

You need help wiping that off.

Just so you know, I'm not mad anymore.

I MySpace'd it all out of my system.

Now hurry up, or we're going to be late for the opening ceremony.

Why him?

Why now?

Why who?

Aisha, I met this guy.

What? I wasn't even sure you remember what guys were.

His name is Pen and he's so... Carson Free.

He's awesome and smart, but in a good way. And he's hot. Caliente hot. Aisha,

I wanted to lick his abs.

But you didn't, right?

No.

I need to stay focused.

That means no cute boys.

Right now, beating the Jets is my top priority.

And you're doing the right thing. I know.

So can I have him?

Ooh, he looks hot.

Just don't.

I like your hair that way, Chelsea.

I like this new gel.

My hair always looks better when there's something sticky.

All right, who is she?

What? The girl who's making you stupid.

All right, check it out.

I met her today when I was running.

Her name's... Carson?

Right. Wrong.

She's a shark. She's the freaking captain of the sharks. What did she say?

What did she want? Did she ask about her routines?

Yeah, right.

Chain was the last thing we talked about.

Pen, she's like your sworn enemy.

I swear it.

Trust me, she's not my enemy.

Pen,

you need to know.

Carson's a two-faced, backbiting, man-eating shark. Yeah, and guys hate

biters.

Why are you guys busting on me? Because you don't get.

Yeah, I think I do.

Don't flatter yourself, Penn.

This is about our team.

About winning. So now what, Captain?

You gonna forbid me from seeing Carson?

I would never do that.

Good. Because it wouldn't work.

He can't date a shark!

Dutch, Halsey.

Watch and learn.

Now I want you all to remember this gorgeous face, because it will haunt you

in your sleep.

Now I believe in hard work.

Winning knows no pain.

So when I say jump, I want to hear how high.

Now jump.

That's what I'm talking about. Don't hate the player, baby.

Okay, seriously, Cheerzilla is a little scary.

I love her.

She's the kind of black woman gay men emulate. She's amazing.

the beat.

tradition here at Camp Spirit Thunder.

This spirit stick was given to me by the father of cheerleading himself, Herky

Herkimer. It embodies the heart and the soul of cheerleading and it brings the

luck of the cheer spirits.

So, each team will be able to experience its powerful aura for one

night.

Last year's winners of the championships will have the honors first.

The East Coast Jets.

Just a warning. Lose the stick and

you will face the wrath of the cheer gods.

I once knew a cheerleader who misplaced the stick for just one day and she broke

her leg doing a simple toe touch.

So guard it with your lives, people.

You will find good fortune while it's in your possession, Jets.

Cheer Smackdown!

Word, Shorty. Use your words.

Abs!

Pen!

Go, Jets!

Oh, girl.

You know a cheer crypt can't be hitting you with a cheer blood.

You're a jet?

Yeah, it's a trip, huh? Why didn't you tell me?

What, that I was a male cheerleader?

Sure, that's a real panty drop.

Look, I didn't mean any... Did Brooke tell you to play me?

Sucks to be you, huh?

Carson, I didn't know you were a cheerleader.

Like, what's the big deal? I'm a jet.

So what? So what?

I cannot have an interterrestrial relationship.

Hello? Greetings, Camp Spirit Thunder.

A friendly video postcard from Camp Victory.

Looking very forward to seeing you in the championships.

We've got a secret weapon this year.

Say, Pepper, how many of your kids can throw a round-off back handspring double

full twist?

Oh, none?

Meet the new and improved Flamingos.

See you at the gym.

Flamingos? They can barely stand on one leg.

Everybody, it is all right.

Vance Voorhees is just trying to psych us out, okay? And it didn't work last

year, and it's not gonna work this year. We always win.

Nothing's gonna stop us this week.

Except the Sharks.

Your little trick's not gonna work, Brooke.

Making sure I knew Penn was a Jet makes it that much easier to resist him.

Ouch. No player, but I thought I had a little game. Sorry, Penn, but I've only

got one thing on my mind.

Now that's crushing your squad.

Not even in your dreams, Carson.

We're done here. Let's go.

Hey, can you go on spiritaccessories.com and see if they have the keychains that

light up?

Pink's the new black.

What's the new pink?

Aisha, I'm trying to work here.

I have to find a killer stunt that'll knock East Coast on their spanks.

Sorry.

It doesn't matter.

I can't concentrate anyway.

Hey, you need to get serious, because I don't care how cute he is. We are here

to win, right?

Chew that, sister, yo.

Girl, go to sleep.

Tomorrow's gonna be fun.

Do it again.

Go. Go.

All right, Reuben, you're up. P-E-A-C-E.

Peace to the Middle East. Go planet.

He can't do that, can he? I mean, if he cheers for peace, then the terrorists

win. Duh.

Everyone to give me big facials, because you have to remember that points will be

deducted for bad facials, okay?

All right, all right, you guys. Now, any of those dance moves can be used in a

cheer routine.

Since when is dance a part of cheerleading anyway?

Since the world first started recognizing that cheerleading was real.

I mean, think about it, you guys. If you've got some dope cheerleading, you

throw in some hot dance moves, and you've got some crazy tumbling, what do

you have?

You got a triple threat, right?

Triple threat right here.

Yo, I got this. Okay, okay.

Bring it, boo.

Ain't like they can hang when our sister gets to cracking and popping her

collarbone.

You smell me?

Uh-uh. What the hell are you doing?

I'm keeping it real, sister.

Keeping it real for who?

You need to just be you. Okay, boo? Just be you.

facials at a funeral. And I'm talking about the corpses.

Oh, we like that, do we?

Oh, gosh.

Goodness. Okay. All right. Well, the workshop is over.

You do just one face.

Come on.

If you hate cheating so much, why do you do it?

For Satan.

That's a shiny nugget I did not need to know.

Satan is my car.

My parents promised me payments and insurance if I joined the squad.

Well, my parents promised me a car if I stopped cheerleading.

And if I nail a girl, I get my own apartment.

See, that was almost a facial. Yeah, Transylvania.

Step off, Brooke.

Who are you, her fairy goth mother?

Brooke, get over yourself and stop sweating my team. Why would anyone

listen to you?

You suck as a gymnast and a captain, too.

Cheer off.

Sharks! Yeah?

We lift with ease, the things we do will make you wheeze.

So watch us strike our muscle pose, while you all dance in do-si-do.

That was cute, your pose was wild, so all of you have belly rolls.

Once again, we groove with flair, the moves we do, you wouldn't dare. So

listen quick, while your face gets cracked.

One, two, three, you're whacked. Your rhymes are fun, but we're still cookie

silk, it's not your front.

We laugh, we cry, we all say hi, cause when you dance it's bye bye.

Yo, that was shady, Brooke.

Please, you totally popped the chubber.

Hey, Brooke.

What? You've got no clue you're in the dark. Wake up, Cole. It's the year of

the... Whoa!

Come on, baby kids. If we all just imagine this world's a fabulous place,

it'll happen.

I see children frolicking under a rainbow, eating hormone-free treats.

Oh, a unicorn.

I see mutant turtles gnawing on festering human flesh.

You need Jesus.

Or Prozac.

Thanks for trying to cheer me up, Ruben, but... I'm more mad at myself than

Brooke.

I let her get to me.

That's why we lost the cheer-off.

Yeah, that bites.

You gonna finish that steak?

You'll be all right.

spirit to you hey heard you had kind of a rough day

huh but your luck's about to change okay all right uh west coast sharks may

the luck of herky smile on you as it has for me go shark

Little extreme.

You know how nasty some cheerleaders can be when they're alive?

Do you really want to risk the dead ones hating on you? Then let's do this right.

Fire.

Water.

Earth.

Air. Spirit stick.

You know what this really needs to pop?

The blood of a virgin.

Okay, why are you gonna- Who's looking at me? Come on, Carson.

It's just a little pinprick. If she can take a little prick, she wouldn't be a

virgin.

You coming?

Hell to the yeah.

Where?

You wouldn't be into it.

Cheer poker with the prairie dogs.

What's the buy-in?

Sarah, this is cheer poker.

Sounds like easy pickings.

Wait. Who's going to guard the spirits today?

You guys go.

I'm captain.

I'll do stake duty.

Thanks. Thanks, boo. What room is the poker game?

Dumpy dogs have a street.

Why can't I delete you?

Psst, down here.

Penn, what are you doing?

Well, you don't answer my calls or texts, so I had to do it old school and

show up in person.

Don't make me serenade you. Penn, you're a jet.

We can't... I know, I know.

Look, let's just do the rides.

No cheer talk, I promise.

The Double Dragon?

Now you're talking.

I'll meet you.

See ya.

You had fun, didn't you?

Hey, I know how to play, bro.

What? I take cheering seriously.

You know, a team's counting on me. I'm not going to let them down.

Word on the street, it's just summer camp.

Yeah, maybe for you.

We worked our butts off just to get here.

So did we.

And we didn't raise a lot of money.

You know, wet T-shirt car washes.

Trust me, I know.

Anyways, winning a competition like this, it could really help my chance of

getting a scholarship to college.

I even had to get a team scholarship just to get here.

Yeah, so did I.

You know, it's nothing to be ashamed of.

In my case, it is.

What do you mean?

Look, don't get all serious on these skits. Come on.

You fumbled on the flop, we'll trick you on the turn. Now here comes the river

and the P-Dog will burn.

You dogs think you can fool us sharks with poker faces?

You are so bluffing, prairie dog. I call trip cowboys. I beat that.

How about my three bullets shoot down your cowboys? P-Dogs rule!

Oh yeah? How about a Texas titty twister on the house? Hey, what are you doing?

A world tour is no big deal to me, and I've been overseas my whole life.

Well, if you win again, you can get a cheer scholarship, too.

To West Point?

Okay, wait, why would you go there?

You're a musician and a dancer.

Yeah, well, my father's the son of immigrants, and they came from nothing.

And after he made a career out of the military, he had everything.

So all his sons went to West Point.

There's five of us, and, well, I'm the last one.

So my parents, well, my father expects it.

Well, can't you talk to him?

I mean, won't he let you cheer somewhere else?

Wait, he doesn't know?

My dad would spew a colon.

I kind of told him I joined the Taekwondo team.

Can I tell you a secret, just between us?

Sure.

What? Even though my family has money, I took a team scholarship because I

didn't want them to find out about cheer camp.

Wow.

Well, does your team know?

Weak, huh?

So, where did your dad think you are now?

Extreme warrior martial arts camp.

He watched me pack my nunchucks.

Whoa, you sharks do stick together.

Oh, go get Carson.

Honey, that girl could wear a thong.

Yeah, my girl needs to learn to hang.

But we need to take the show to my crib.

She's guarding the stick there. Come on, let's go.

Yo, Carson dipped out.

And took the stack.

Where?

Maybe my girl learned to hang. Come on, let's go find her.

You know, I should really go throwing.

I just told you my darkest secret.

Yeah, I know, but... Look.

When's the last time you just danced for fun without being thrown in the air

every few seconds?

Hmm.

About a mitzvah three years ago.

thinks he can handle west coast moves i think shark girl's asking the wrong

question

Too many haters.

Well, else can we look?

Oh, no.

What?

I'm about to have a secret, too.

Carson!

What are you guys doing here?

Us? You need to check yourself.

We were just hanging out.

Carson, give us back the spirit stick.

You junk up as karma out here with all these civilians.

Ruben, it's in our room. No, it's not.

Why do you think we're out here looking for you?

Somebody jacked it.

And now we know for sure who.

Jets.

Jets kick ass from east to west. And speaking of coincidence.

You lost the spirit stick?

Ooh, you sharks are tuna.

Just give it back.

Carson, this isn't a Jets prank. I wouldn't scam you like this.

Come on, Carson.

It's just a big coincidence how he got you out of your room and then the spirit

stick was stolen.

Seems wrong he didn't tell you he was a Jet when he met you.

That's right.

This has cheer bitches' skanky paw prints all over it.

Don't let them play us again, Carson.

It's our year, remember?

This is so whack. Look, Carson, I hope you look for the stupid stick, all

right? What?

Stupid stick? Yeah.

I'll help you look, too.

Don't get all crazy about this, okay? No, it's not okay.

How can I trust someone who lies to his own team?

Carson. You know, he didn't need you guys to raise travel money for the trip.

He was too scared to tell his dad about cheer camp.

She's a liar.

Right, Penn?

No, bro.

I should have just believed you when you said sharks and jets were sworn enemies.

Now I know why.

You showed your true colors, didn't you?

And you showed you're just a jet.

Have fun being cursed, losers.

Hey, we still have candy bars for you, dude.

I'll pay back the money, okay?

Uh oh.

So, it's true. You lost my spirit stick.

Pepper, I'm sorry. Look, I got distracted. Well, it was up to you to

guard it with your lives.

We'll find it, Pepper.

Oh, you'd better.

Yeah, so on the real, what happens if we don't?

Oh, who knows? You remember that cheerleader I was telling you about? Uh

-huh. Well, after she broke her leg, her entire team got some kind of nasty

stomach virus, and they all vomited on the competition floor, all right? And

needless to say, everyone was happy to see them go home the next day.

The spirit stick gods can take this victory away from us. We are going to

win, damn it.

Pyramids, seven, eight, one, two, three, four, five, six... Hey!

You guys, get up.

This is one fast-acting curse.

Damn curse.

Let the curse be with you!

This is all the money I've got on me right now.

So I can give you the rest as soon as I can.

Alright?

That's not what I care about.

So what's your deal then?

Do you want to be here or not?

At this minute?

Not so much.

I'm serious.

We want to win.

And now you know what kind of snakes those sharks really are.

Yeah, they're like snarks.

The enemy.

Yeah, I get it, Chelsea.

Do you?

Look, I get it.

You're not into me.

Nothing's going to happen.

But it will happen for this team.

And the only way it's going to work is if we do this together.

Yeah.

So are you, like, with us or what?

J to the E to the T to the S.

Jets kick ass from east to west.

You know they stole the stick.

It don't matter who took it. We gotta bust a calf in this curve.

Even Ruben thinks so now. You know what? I think it's time for Sarah to do her

thing. A cheer sacrifice?

Has it really come to that?

Well, if it'll get us a win, we'll do it at midnight.

Go spirits!

It wouldn't hurt.

Girl, you're lucky strapless.

If you love something, set it free.

Oh, my God.

The cheer spirits are here.

They don't sound cheerful.

Maybe it was just the wind.

That's for trying to get us cursed, freak.

Yeah, stuff that you don't deserve. Like when you just feel the... spirit stick

to win you couldn't even beat me in a cheer off loser all right that's it you

want a real battle sharks and jets right now verified no contact let's go

come on you guys go around the corner let's go hey

snarks

Charts! Charts!

What happened tonight is an all-time, an all-time low for Camp Spirit

Thunder. You've just ruined this camp's chances against Vance. And even worse,

you lost my spirit stick.

Brooke, give Pepper back her spirit stick. Hey, loser, if I had the... If I

had a stick, why would my team have gotten hurt? Because your team started

the rumble. You don't even deserve to be here. You're standing four-legged.

Enough!

You kids have let down yourselves, your camp, and your country.

Take a look around.

Neither of you have enough team members to compete now.

So in the morning, when you get up, there'll be buses here waiting to take

you all home.

Tomorrow, we need to whip those little prairie dogs into shape.

Then, girlfriend, you better pray for a miracle.

You chose to surrender the best thing that's happened to you What

were you missing?

Were you just tripping?

Running away from your fear was the best you could do

Let's just go home and pretend this whole sorry trip never happened.

What a nightmare.

Here's the spirit stick, Brooke.

I know you have it. You are still the rock star of stupid.

Why would I keep the stick and stay cursed?

Can we all just get over it? Even Paris and Nicole settled their diff. Shut up,

Ruben!

I've given it back by now to get rid of the curse.

Whatever. She is still a sick individual.

Now just go to sleep.

I don't need any more drama tonight, okay?

But that means... Ben had nothing to do with it either.

They would be thinking that I would be pleading to you to get back

together.

Well, how about never?

You guys, we can't leave like this.

It's like we're giving up. I promised you guys a way, and we're gonna get one.

Look, I don't think you stole the spirit stick anymore.

Like I give a flying tuck what you think.

Well, I do think you want to win camp championships as much as I do. So what?

Well, if there was any chance to stay and compete, you'd consider it, right?

Even if we're not coming together.

Ew, that's like cheer sets.

Chelsea, I meant combining our teams.

Look, it's about not quitting.

Pepper wants her camp to win. I think she'll help us. Brilliant plan, Carson.

Look, I think the Jets are already on the spirits' hit list.

Because of you!

Okay, well, if we leave now, we'll all stay cursed.

Come on, Brooke.

Boo that freak.

We're out of here.

Pen?

Look, I'm sorry for... Well, it's kind of a long list.

Later, Carson.

You can call me Skids.

What?

You wanted me to say yes to Hilary Duff light?

Strap on a pair, Penn. Can I borrow yours?

Don't even try to outbitch me.

Yeah, Brooke's like the Olympics champion.

No doubt.

I just never pegged you for a quitter. I'm not quitting, Penn.

I'm embracing my future.

Which is freaking right.

Everyone says so.

They say a lot of other stuff about her too, you know. Shut up, Chelsea!

Okay.

We're in. Yes!

I'm captain, of course.

You two perform together in wood.

A cheer death match?

No, we would be... Co-captains.

Pepper, even with only half our squads, you still got the best cheerleaders in

camp. Hey, P-Dog, it is only a jump if your feet come off the ground.

Okay, hon?

Pep, I'm trying to tell you, these prairie dogs are so bad... They can't

even roll over.

Don't give up on them yet.

Come on, y'all. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Two, two,

three, four, five, six, seven, eight. We are the Bombing Ghosts! We are the

Bombing Ghosts! We are the Bombing Ghosts!

Please give us a second chance.

Sorry, don't believe in those angel pants, so y'all just...

No flamingo could throw down like that last year. Get out of my camp, Voorhees!

Hey, we're just passing through, ma'am. Don't get your score in a twist.

Wouldn't it be fun to, like, rip him a new one in championships?

All right, you guys. We called you out here to tell you that Pepper got us a

group with the council.

And now all we need is a new name.

I was thinking the East-West Spirit.

Ain't that an Amtrak train?

Why can't we have a cool name like Tomcat or Bennifer?

How about the Jarks?

How about the Sharts?

Ew.

How about the Shets?

I mean, I don't see you guys coming up with something better.

All right, we're the Shets.

Mm-mm, mm-mm.

This ain't gonna work.

Remember what happened to Tupac and Biggie? We'll make it work.

We're combining the best parts of both routines, so get up. Up, guys. Come on,

you guys, positions, get up.

and Chelsea get in the back?

I so don't need the back row. Tell her, Brooke. Why doesn't Gothasaurus step to

the back?

Because Gothasara can dance her little ass off.

Now let's try this.

Come on.

Chelsea, please.

Five, six, seven, eight. One, two, three, four. Five, six, seven, eight.

Ready? Try it. 5, 6, 7, 8. 1, 2, 3, 4. 5,

6, 7, 8. 1, 2, 3, 4. 5, 6,

7,

8. I got this.

We got the fever. Yeah, bite me.

You're doing great, honey.

Hey, Penn.

I... I'll be back before next practice.

Um, you know, I was hoping that we could talk. And by talk, I mean... You know, I

thought that maybe we could have a do-over?

Do-over?

Carson, I think we're done.

Look, Penn, I'm sorry I accused you of stealing the spirit stick.

And, of course, embarrassing you and telling everyone your darkest secret.

That was bad, but... This could be going better.

Look, Carson, I'm gonna work my ass off to help our team win.

But you and me, I think we should stick to our own coast.

All right?

Baby, you got the move, baby, you're gonna sing. You need to be next to

me, baby, like a 83, gonna make you sing. One, two, four, five, six.

But I need to be next to you, baby, you got the move, gonna make you sing.

Thank you.

Pepper's lost her mind.

I think she put out an Amber Alert, too.

Man, I'd love to know who took it.

I smell P-Dog.

No.

I bet it was the flamingos. Look, either way, let's just hope the curse is done.

We need all the help we can get.

You know what? You're right.

Let's practice our routine one more time.

Ow! What are you guys...

I had a change of heart, and don't know where it's at.

What I'm about to say will surprise you.

Now the sea's clear.

Bet I can cheer you up.

Don't be a wad, Penn.

Go find Carson.

Excuse me?

Yeah, I know.

Never thought I'd say those words.

But hey, if you're into a bony ass and cankles, then what the hell?

Not up.

Go get her, fool.

Yeah, but after she ratted me out, I can't make myself trust her, you know?

Why not?

Damn.

I must be insane.

Doesn't mean I have to be.

Do what you want, Pen.

But don't be a pendejo.

Bro, thanks.

Who at least want to be an amiga?

Whatever. By the way, you're the boss.

I'm double-jointed.

Five, six, seven, eight. One, two, three, four. Five, six, seven, eight.

One, two, three, four. Five, six, seven, eight. One and two and three and four.

Hey, ever heard of this new thing called counting?

Everybody stretch, now.

Ever heard of teamwork? Shut up. Carson. Yo, watch it, cuz.

Yo, stop frontin', cuz. I heard you at Chicago.

You're not just an Oreo, Aisha.

You double-stuffed. You're wrong, Brooke.

My girl, she been pulling drive-bys since she was a shorty. Yo, she was

drinking four years off the nipple.

Carson? So don't be getting all up in her Kool-Aid biatch, because I have seen

what she's done to fugly swamp donkeys like you for shizzle.

Carson, it's over.

Are you sure? I cannot watch you for shizzle ever again.

Good.

Look, y'all, all this girl please and cursing, it ain't me.

I mean, it isn't me.

I just did it to get your respect.

See, the real Aisha got teased every day in junior high for being an Oreo.

You know, black on the outside, white on the inside.

And I've been hood ratting it up ever since.

Ooh.

You're whiter than me.

Maybe so, but that's who I am.

Just a black girl who enunciates.

Do you have something to say?

Hey, if you want respect that badly, just be a bitch, like me.

Same respect, half the effort.

Guess the bitch is out the bag.

Truth out.

I'm a virgin.

Technically. I just act that way so guys will like me.

But it's really hard being slutty all the time.

I don't know how you do it, Brooke.

My parents aren't bribing me to be a cheerleader.

I do it because cheerleading is dark and twisted.

Are you high?

No. Think about it.

We cheer for the other team's failure just as much as we cheer for our own

team's victory.

That's so twisted.

Sarah?

Okay, I'm a little high.

Yo, this is like confession.

I'm out of here.

No, wait.

I have something to confess.

This should be good.

Miss USA has a secret.

Spill, Tara Connor.

I'm scared.

It's okay, Carson.

You can do it.

No, that's it.

I'm scared.

You know, I act like the fearless captain who's not afraid to go for it,

but in reality, going for it is my biggest fear.

I'm so confused.

But don't let it stop you. I mean, it happens all the time.

Yeah, what I meant was... I just wish I could believe in myself as much as I

believe in all of you.

I'm not gay.

I like girls.

A lot.

Are you serious?

I'm straight.

You girls just assumed, so... Once you started changing in front of me, I

couldn't stop you.

And then... Then I was, like, committed.

Hold up.

There's no way this guy's not gay, and I'll prove it.

Okay, he is not gay.

No, but he is dead!

Hey, mom.

Hey, can I speak to the general?

All right.

Hello, sir.

No, everything's fine.

I'm fine.

No, I'm great.

Actually, I'm not at warrior camp exactly.

I'm at cheer camp.

Because I'm a cheerleader.

Yes, one of those.

Sir.

Dad.

Dad, excuse me, puppy.

Listen, here's the funny thing. When you hear the rest, cheerleading's gonna

sound like the good part.

About West Point.

Okay, that was traumatic, but good, right?

I mean, now we can work as a team. Yeah, a team of freaks.

We are not a team, okay?

We can't combine our teams, and this was a dumbass idea.

Tell them, Ruben, we can do this.

We blow. We cannot do this, because we're cursed, all of us.

Holy crap, Ruben.

Snap out of it.

What have you done with Happy Ruben?

It's weird, you know?

Now that I'm not gay anymore.

I'm not gay anymore.

Okay, we're freaks. But let's make that work for us.

Come on, you guys. I mean, there has to be some way that we can perform

together.

We can start with couples.

I'll take the

There you go.

For real.

This could work.

And I'll prove it. Get over here.

All right, everybody ready?

From the top.

Look, I'm cool about you coming out of a straight closet.

Please, you're just saying that so I'll try to catch you.

Try.

All right, five, six, seven, eight.

Running so far from all season

actually win this.

Maybe we should make sure.

Compare the opposing armies so we may know where strength lies.

Recon?

Hey guys, we need to get some disguises.

They practice on stage 70A. Find it.

Cell phones ready?

Recompositions by texting only.

Break!

Chels, I'm right next to you.

Thank you.

Hey, Ron, get the gate for me.

Hello, Mr. Flamingos.

The Flamingos just started.

Listen, we have got to tighten up the schedule. I need more time for my

Flamingos on the spring field.

Keep up the good work.

I guess your father would laugh at us, huh?

He's not big in the laughter.

You know, I told him everything.

Really?

Then what'd he say about you being a cheerleader?

Well, that he laughed at.

Hey, covert cheer-off.

2-2-1 pyramid.

All right, Ruben, Eric, Nick, you three in the corner, me in the base.

Come on, guys, hurry up.

Let's go.

Chelsea, watch out for the guard.

Brooke, first level.

Wait,

how did you guys get in here?

Seriously? That guy wasn't even a real guard.

If an enemy leaves the door open, you must rush in. Art of war.

Oh, my

gosh.

Welcome to Geertopia.

State-of-the-art everything.

Is that Letty Trotter?

Choreographer to the stars.

That look on your face.

That's the same look I had after my divorce.

So sad to see a dream die.

Anywho, give my best to Pepper, would you?

Dance wasn't bluffing.

Their tumbling's amazing.

Those flamingos are, like, better than us.

We need to come up with something really good.

No, really?

I thought we'd come up with something bad and see if we can win that way.

Sorry. It's a reflex.

What are we gonna do? Look, I don't know, okay? I can't believe it. After

all this.

I just wanted to win camp championships once.

Don't freak out, Carson.

Yeah, easy for you to say. You've won.

Look, our dance routine is better than theirs.

We just need a triple threat.

Let's think. What would Sun Tzu do?

Make use of concubines who are greedy for gold.

I don't think Sun Tzu would be riding a roller coaster, Carson.

You see all the red and blue rails loop, crisscross, and then corkscrew away?

Yeah, almost like a double helix.

That'll be the path of the two flyers.

Sweet. No one's ever done that before.

We're going to need something new if we want to win.

Imagine if we pull it off. That'll be six.

Oh, cool.

But is it possible?

Yeah, it's going to be real difficult for the flyers.

Who's going to do it?

If I get up, I might fall back down again. So let's get up, come on. If I

get up, I might fall back down again.

But we get up anyway. If I get up, I might fall back down again. So let's get

up, come on. If I get up, I might fall back down again. I might fall back down

again. And we'll just jump and see, even if it's a 20 time.

We'll just jump and see if we can fly.

Yeah, I'm fine. All right, you guys, let's do it again.

Hey, Aisha, who taught you to sew?

Martha Stewart.

All right.

One portable hot press.

Nice work.

Where'd you find that?

Concierges can do anything all over the world.

Listen to yourself when we win tomorrow.

Where in the world of competition sports will you find two arch rivals forced by

a dramatic twist of fate?

To join teams and combine their styles to face a mysterious new challenger?

Well, right here at the All-Star Cheer Camp Championship, where one of these

teams will win the title and the right to represent the United States in the

World Cheer Exhibition Tour. And who will that be?

Presenting Camp Victory, ladies and gentlemen,

This is a cheer-zaster.

A cheer-tastrophe.

Total chick-lips of the sun.

Not bad. Good one.

Look, no, you guys are all wrong, okay?

We're still good. We just... We want the crowd to be pumped up.

You take your best shot, lightness You take it anyway You're gonna make your

move today Got the will, you'll find a way To change the world someday Grab

this moment before it's gone Today's your day, it's on!

Jets. Shets.

It doesn't really matter what you call yourselves.

Oh, and you call yourselves the Flaming Hoes?

Yeah, that's a bad choice.

Introducing to you, the Mighty Flamingos!

Hope you've been practicing your loser facials.

Oh, wait, I think you're on.

You are so on.

Come on, guys.

They're even better than I remembered.

And they're not even cursed.

Cursed.

Okay,

you've got to get over yourself and fast.

What? Stop psyching yourself out. Look, I'm totally fine. You're totally not,

and they know it. You're scared.

What else do you want me to say? You've been right about me all along. I'm not a

good leader. My skills aren't that great. Are you idiots?

This is not about skills.

This competition is about showmanship. Your choreography is going to win it for

us.

So wouldn't you know you're more creative than me?

Why else would I bother to put you down?

Person, you've got it.

You always have.

But for the shed's sake, now you've got to bring it.

Hey, it's your year, remember?

No, Brooke.

It's our year.

Don't worry skits, I checked the months.

Just catch him, okay?

Great.

All set, Penn.

Those are our catchings.

Thank you.

Curse may have been the best thing that's ever happened to us.

Without this curse, we would have never become this team and hit a stunt that's

never been done before. I mean, that was amazing.

I have the results right here.

I'll be reading third place, apparently.

In third place, representing South Dakota, the Prairie Dolls!

Way to go, Dolls!

Look, we all give 100% when we trust each other. Who cares about some stupid

old trophy and roll to it?

stupid 16 work in the first place pepper maybe it did we broke the curse you

sure did

Boy walkin' the spot, he's so freshin' He got what he needs, impressin' Just

look at the way that he dressin' Ain't no question, chick's like, oh Girl

walkin' the spot, she stop traffic She blowin' your mind with her acid So

brisket, apple, fantastic, instant classic Boy's like, oh Baby, I can see

us movin' like that Baby, I can see us touchin' like that Baby, I can see us

kissin' like that We don't need no more than he said, she said Baby, I can see

us movin' like that Baby, I can see us touchin' like that

I can see us kissing like that Like that We don't need no more than he said, she

said He said, girl, you're winning She said, boy, where you been at? Where you

been? Let's get with it just like that

as if there's no pressure.

He'd do anything to get with her. He'd say anything to convince her. Money

spent to diamond sense her. Girl playing it cool, but she's with it. She loving

the fact that she's gifted.

Everything that he do, she gets lifted. Feels so wicked loving like, oh.

Maybe I can see us moving like that. Maybe I can see us touching like that.

Maybe I can see us kissing like that.

We don't need no more that he said, she said. Maybe I can see us moving like

that. Maybe I can see us touching like that.

I can see us kissing like that We don't need no more than he said, she said He

said, girl, you're winning She said, boy, where you been at? Stop talking,

let's get with it just like that

Oh, what you waiting for, huh?