Original subtitles

And so, gentlemen, I urge you to deliberate most carefully... before

reaching a decision on so vital and momentous a question.

Yes, yes, of course. Mr. President, I agree with our eminent professor of

metaphysics... and I suggest that we postpone further consideration of

this... No, no, definitely no. I object.

I must remind Professor Pillsbury that we cannot procrastinate further.

The present public await our verdict impatiently. We must act today, now.

Mr. President.

Mr. President? After careful and scientific analysis, it is the opinion

of the Department of Mathematics that Yale University can beat the pants off

Michigan.

I disagree.

Look at what Michigan's team did at Northwestern. And you still owe me 50

cents from that game.

just one week before we play Harvard, and we dare not risk facing as strong a

team as Michigan. We must find a more desirable opponent.

May I suggest Arkansas normal?

I'm afraid not. This game is for charity, and we cannot select too weak

an opponent, or no one will come to see it.

Then how about Nebraska?

We've decided on the University of Texas.

Texas? Yes. Will you see that an invitation is sent and that the

newspapers are notified?

Yes, sir.

Thank you.

Vacate, son.

Texas.

The game won't draw flies unless the players bring their horses.

Look it up for me, will you, Freddy?

Look what up? The address of Texas.

The address of Texas?

Texas University, you flathead.

Oh.

There's two of them. Which one do you want?

Yale University takes great pleasure in hereby inviting you.

What? Which one?

Texas University, I told you.

Prairie, Texas.

P-R-A-I-R-I-E.

Grand Central Station, all out.

Don't worry, he will.

Remember, he's married.

And you know what football coaches' wives are like.

I'll say.

They think a forward pass is something a girl shouldn't make it a boy.

Hey, Bev, is the Fort Worth train on time?

Maybe. Tell you when she gets in.

Aiming to go someplace?

No, we're meeting a new football coach. He's coming all the way from New York.

Boy, we're going to have a team this year. We're going to put TSU on the map.

Looks like it's fixing to rain.

See anything of Biff Bentley? No.

Fine thing if the captain of the team isn't here.

We won't have much of a captain if Sally Saxon doesn't let him along.

Oh, here's Biff now.

Our captain's tackling awfully high this season. The new coach will fix that.

Hiya, fellas. Sorry I'm late.

Black tire.

I see you brought it with you. Hello.

Hello, honey. Just talking about you. And all the time I... I thought it was

your engine knocking, darling.

Hey, you two will have to cut that out. Jealous, Chippy dear?

Remember, Biff's in training.

Biff doesn't need any training.

Perfect now.

You'll all have to toe the mark this season with a new coach.

Suits me as long as he can teach us football.

He will.

Boy, I sure had a tough time luring him away from Flushing. Flushing what?

Flushing, Long Island.

Are you packed yet, sweetheart?

Come on, stop kidding and step on it.

What the? Oh, excuse me, darling.

Now, listen, don't pull any of those offside plays on me. I'm sorry,

sweetheart. Sorry?

Not half as sorry as you're going to be for dragging me out here through this

forsaken desert.

Flushing was a heaven compared to this.

Are you sure you didn't join the Foreign Legion?

Now, what's wrong with Texas?

Look at that sky, that sand. You can have it. I'll take Coney Island.

The wind, the wide open spaces.

That's wide enough. You can shut it now.

Where men are men.

Yeah, and I'm stuck with you. And you're stuck with... Oh, there you go again.

Always belittling. Look here, Bessie. I'm going to be a big shot down here.

What'll people think of a football coach whose wife has always... Go on and

finish dressing.

Look, you can't talk to me like... I said finish dressing.

Well, that's different.

All right, all right.

we've always needed is a two-fisted coach who could give it and take it.

Now, at last, we've got one. Here she comes.

Oh, boy, come on.

Come on, we're in.

Hurry up.

Hold it.

Hey, that must be them.

Hey, here they are, fellas.

how'd you get i'm carson athletic manager and publicity director for tsu

pleased to meet you my name is winters i suppose this is mrs winters well if

winters comes can mrs winters be far behind may i present miss watson miss

jones the saxon and tommy barker and this is vip bentley our captain hi my

name's winters oh on behalf of the faculty and student body i want to

welcome you both to texas state university And we hope that as coach of

the football team, you will bring success and glory to TSU and to

yourself.

I want to thank you, fellows and girls, and on behalf of Mrs. Winters and

myself. You can leave me out of this. You can leave me out.

I want to say that it's a great deal of pleasure to fight for TSU.

Dear old Texas, I thank you.

That's the best speech you've ever made.

Well, the car's right over here, Mr. Winters. Oh, fine.

You know, I'm going to be very happy down here. And I think we're going to

have a great season.

You look like first-class material.

A rough-and-ready bunch of youngsters who aren't afraid to go in there and

fight. I've started seasons with worse-looking players and turned them

into champions.

With your brawn and my, uh... Experience?

We'll be a tough outfit to beat.

I want to get to know all you fellows personally.

And I want you all to know me.

Say, they look pretty thin. What's the matter, diet?

Oh, they play a lot better than they look, Mrs. Winters. I hope so.

Oh, sure. Move over.

You see Biff Bentley there?

Why, he was All-State fullback last year. He's great. He can pass, kick, and

run. A real triple threat man.

Got anybody else that's good?

Well, we will have when Mr. Winters gets through with him.

He's gonna do big things here, Mrs. Winters. You know, we got as much

confidence in your husband as you have.

Yeah.

I hate to talk about myself, but last year in Flushing, where I turned out, as

you might have heard, one of the greatest, one of the...

Just a minute, fellas.

Excuse us, folks.

Pardon us.

What did they say now?

Nothing. It's what you were going to say. Listen, I want you to find out

something. What?

When does the next train leave for New York?

Why? Why?

You're no magician.

The day of miracles has passed.

Now go home and pack your toothbrush and let's go back to flushing. Wait a

minute. Go back there and coach those high school kids again?

Here I got a chance to coach a college team and get myself a reputation.

Yeah, a reputation that'll keep you out of a job for the rest of your life. You

can't make a team out of that herd.

I can't, eh?

Listen, in my dictionary there's no such a word as can't.

Ron isn't the only thing that wins football games. It takes brains.

At last we agree on something.

Now let's get out of here while we still have the fair.

and send another to the University of Texas.

Gentlemen, we can't do that. That would be an obvious insult.

Professor Pillsbury is right.

I find Texas State hasn't won a game in two years.

A fine opponent for a big charity game.

We'll be the laughing stock of the nation.

Young man, I must ask for your resignation.

Just a minute, Dr. Burke. May I say a few words?

Great teams have come out of the South.

Teams that the North never heard of until they played famous Northern 11s.

Remember Center of Kentucky when it played Harvard?

Publicity made those games interesting, and publicity can do it again.

Why, I know all about this Texas State University team.

You do?

Of course.

They're light and fast, and they play a brand of football we don't see up here.

They're tricky. They're unorthodox. They throw that big skin around like an

apple. Gentlemen, it's David and Goliath. Little David from the South and

Big Goliath from the North. Give me a chance, gentlemen. Give me a chance.

I'll build this game up to the point where everyone in the country will be

fighting for tickets. It's a natural.

Sparks, I don't think you know a thing about Texas State, and I'd advise you

not to try and find out.

But I do like your imagination.

Now you go ahead and let it run wild.

Thank you, sir.

Thank you, gentlemen.

All I can say is, watch the sports page of your favorite newspaper.

I wonder what position she plays on the team. She's the drawback.

Before we hear any speeches and before we introduce the new coach, why don't

you say we have a little music?

We want Ginger!

We want Ginger! All right, all right. You want Ginger?

Here she is.

We don't have to go to college in search of knowledge today.

Though our English marks are zeros, the movie heroes

teach us to say.

You're slightly terrific, speaking specifically slightly gigantic.

Mean it romantically more than stupendous.

No star in a picture could be so glamorous.

You're such a mixture of everything amorous. What a construction, a major

production.

super colossal suit my philosophy being specific you're slightly

terrific too

Fellows and ladies, this is the biggest day in the history of our alma mater.

From this day on, there's only one thought in the mind of every man and

woman at TSU.

And that is, beat Yale!

I don't know how we happen to be honored with the invitation to play Yale, but,

well, I have my suspicions.

And the man who I think is responsible for the invitation is the man who is

going to turn that invitation into the greatest football victory in the history

of Texas.

Do I have to tell you who he is? You tell me!

and mice make very often go astray. And so although unto the present things,

well, gee, yes, you look pleasant. Who knows what tomorrow's at the brink? We

must be prepared for anything.

So if the team looks tragic and the coach is not a big sensation, we have a

word that's magic. It'll help us out in any situation.

We tried it today and found it okay for chasing our troubles away.

When the jitters begin to get you and you're feeling kind of blue, you'll find

you can lose the jitters and blues by going like this. Though at first you'll

say it's silly.

And you mightn't believe it's true. Just try it and see how happy you'll be the

minute you say woo-hoo.

When things are tough, it's true enough that life is hard to endure.

But there's really nothing wrong with you than a little woo-hoo cure.

So when all your friends desert you and your creditors start to sue, stand up on

a chair, do this to your hair, and holler with us woo-hoo.

We are found in every pasture where a herd of cattle growls. They never say

moo. They holler woo-hoo. That's why they're contented cows.

If the hen that's in your barn...

Be careful, don't yell woo-woo too soon. He's liable to bring her back. Papa Dion

was not surprised with babies number one and two.

But at three he said no. At four he said woo. At five he said woo-woo-woo-woo.

You'd never suspect the silly effect a little woo-woo can get. They use the

phrase in older days and it hasn't failed us yet.

Napoleon's the greatest soldier history's ever known.

They claim he conquered the blooming world entirely on his own.

He said the Greeks had a word for it, but the word was never told.

So we took books and ancient books and we finally found it true that the Greeks

did have a word for it and the word they had is woo-hoo!

When Romeo met Juliet, that very romantic night, we'd like to describe a

scene for you that Shakespeare didn't write.

The moonlight shone and all alone on the balcony stood the two.

So we looked at her and she looked at him and both of them said woo-hoo!

When Mr. Bloom pops in your room, you'll never come to...

With a team so green and new. If you fear that you'll fail to win over Yale,

you know what to do.

A professor, we've got a problem.

X plus Y is 42.

We subtract it and then divide it by 10. And what have we got? A woo-woo.

I'm so surprised to realize how strong this habit can be.

Why, the French are saying woo-woo.

You won't mind if I don't take you home, will you, Laura? I've got to hurry to

town to the newspaper office.

You unrod along, dear. Don't let me interfere with your work. Oh, you know

nothing else could keep me away from you, beautiful.

You want to know something else?

What? Are you keeping a secret?

Uh-huh.

I love you so much, it makes me quiver all over.

And I don't care who knows it.

Let's have a 16 play again.

And no fumbles this time.

What's the matter with you? Can't you hold onto the ball?

And who, may I ask, is that big Lummox?

That's my brother, Elmer.

Oh, well, never mind, honey. There's one in every family. I'll have you know

Elmer is the best basketball player in this whole state.

We've got a great basketball team.

Say, any more basketball players in that alleged football squad?

Yeah, there's four of them. There's Biff Bentley and Connors, Link and Mather. Uh

-huh.

Excuse me.

Hey, Slark!

Come here.

Oh, okay.

Put her through that last play again, Biff. Come on, fellas.

Get in there. That was terrible. Hurry up.

What do you want now?

Have you read this article, stupid?

Yeah, yeah. I thought it was very flattering.

Don't you realize there's a sensational idea in what it says?

You've got a lot of great basketball players out there.

Yeah, but I'm trying to teach them to play football. You've got to teach them

to play basketball football.

I know.

Basketball football?

Right. Oh, listen, honey, do you feel all right?

Maybe you better go home and lie down for a while. This Texas heat has got

you. Listen, Lug, there's nothing wrong with me. It's you.

Here's the answer to all your problems in black and white, and you're too dumb

to see it. All right. What do you want me to do? I want you to practice what

they preach.

Will you quit talking, Riddles? Look, you've got four great basketball

players. Make them your backfield. They're used to heaving a basketball to

each other. Let them do the same thing with a football.

Say,

there may be something to what you say.

Use your brain!

You haven't seen anything yet. This team will be the talk of the country. Yeah,

and you'll do all the talking. And I'll do all the... Say, it's new. Where did

you get the idea, Mr. Woodridge? Oh, it's, uh... It's from something I picked

up in Flushing.

It's awfully crowded in here, isn't it? It's cooler outside.

Want to go for a ride on the new bus?

You don't go too far.

Hey, Sally.

This will warm us up if it gets chilly.

Why, the idea of you two kids drinking and right out here on the campus.

Why, you ought to be ashamed of yourself.

Hmm, gin.

What do you expect for nothing, champagne?

Listen, everybody.

Listen, please.

We're going to settle something once and for all. Will you gather around here?

Come here, Tommy.

Now, quiet. This is very high class.

Go on.

On a bright September morning Back in 1922

It's great to be in college. It makes us use our beans.

You've no idea what we learned last year from campus slot machines.

Though it's a shame promotion came to spoil our freshman days.

We're sophomores now because freshmen look so silly with two A's.

It's great to be in college.

It's too, too, too divine.

As the Greeks would say, it's toujours gay, which in English means it's fine.

Give a lusty cheer for freshman year and the days of auld lang syne.

We graduate from Texas State, but why leave here and suffer?

With millions out of work right now, we'd only make it tougher. We could be

famous doctors like the mayos who amaze ya. But what's the use? You cure some

goose and then he never pays ya. We might be brilliant lawyers settling

other people's grudges.

We know the law, but that's no good cause we don't know the judges.

As plumbers, we'd be awfully dumb because we'd never learned to plumb. A

dentist's life would please us more, but drilling teeth is such a bore. We

thought of aviation, but that's one thing we can't go but.

And that's just why we're

We should be with the CCC. It'll be a whole lot worse.

We love the college dancers.

They've got that certain flair.

When it's crowded, smoke gets in your eyes and drunk skin in your hair.

We join the gym and learn to swim. And if we have cares to drown, our swimming

comes in handy. We know every dive in town. So drink a toast to Texas, the

apple of our eye. If we have our way, here's the place we'll stay and we'll

never say goodbye.

Excuse me, will you please?

Now listen, Bessie, I have a certain... Professor Barton would like to see you.

Tell him I'll be right there.

Bye, Chippy.

Listen, now stay here. Don't go away. I'll be back and get you.

Maybe it isn't as bad as we think.

Any news about Biff yet? Not a thing.

I'm afraid Bentley won't play any more football this year.

He has a fractured leg.

Oh, that's terrible.

Chipped.

Don't worry, honey.

Everything's going to be all right.

Oh, come on, honey. After all, Biff isn't the whole team.

You're wrong, Laura. He is. Without him, they're a bunch of scrubs.

Oh, so sorry.

My name's Herbert Terwilliger Van Dyke. Oh, too bad. There's nothing I can do

about it. Well, I was planning to enroll here.

Could you direct me to the Delta Delta Pie House?

Are you a double-dealt? Sure.

Well, hello.

Glad to know you.

Well, the house is right across the campus, two blocks down.

Too bad you didn't get in sooner. You missed the football rally.

Football? A capitalistic device for the exploitation of the masses, fostered by

the meatpacking barons to promote the sale of pigskin.

But the time is coming. Well, I'll see you around sometime.

Sure, he's all right. He's fine. He's wonderful.

Only his leg ain't feeling so good.

What's the matter with it? Not much. Just busted, that's all.

Busted? Fine thing.

I take my wife to a dance and she goes around breaking people's legs.

Well, I didn't do it on purpose, did I? I told you I was only showing Biff how

to block.

How do I know that I... 25 men on the squad and you had a pick on my best

player. Why didn't you break your own leg? Or even your neck?

What are you doing?

Oh, now, wait a minute. Let me alone. I'm going back home.

Oh, now, listen. Don't be like that, babe.

You can't leave me alone.

You know I can't get along without you. You have to. But I can't. Honest, honey,

please don't.

Oh, why don't you listen to reason?

We're pals, aren't we?

I need you. Honest, I do.

Well, do you promise not to talk to me like that again?

Sure. I didn't mean it. You know how it is.

How would you feel if just when you build up a great team, some stupid half

-witted idiot came along... Idiot!

I'm glad to see you.

Come on in.

Oh, come on, Coach. Don't take it so hard. Accidents will happen.

Hello, Chip. Hello, Mrs. Winters. Look out. She might break your arm.

Well, what do you think we ought to do, Coach?

Maybe we better cancel the Yale game.

Oh, no, you don't. Listen, Chip, can't we find someone to take Biff's place?

Well, there's a peach of a player up at Fort Smith who was coming here, but he

wanted us to pay him.

Of course we couldn't do that. That would be unethical.

Well, it's been done.

What are you doing? Trying to make more trouble for me?

Now you keep out of this. I was only suggesting.

Where are you going?

To the drugstore.

Walk me down, Chip?

Certainly. Can I bring you anything?

Yeah, a ton of aspirin.

Where are you going to get the headache?

In my head.

There you go again.

Say, Chip, what's the name of this player you were talking about? Stanley

Russell. Oh, but it's no use, Mrs. Winters. We can offer him money. You

don't have to. You just let me give him a sales talk. There's no kid that's

going to turn down a chance to play against jail.

Where's your car?

Oh, it's laid up.

Can you borrow one?

Oh, I think I can. Laura has a car.

Then get it and come back here as fast as you can.

Listen, do you want to beat jail or don't you?

I'll be right back.

Remember, not a word to his nibs in there.

I get it. Hurry!

Now listen, Chip, you let me do all the talking. You understand?

All right.

Pardon me, does Mr. Stanley Russell live here?

Is he in?

Well, do you expect him back soon?

Well, is there anybody else home?

Thanks, Chatterbox. We better sit down here and wait.

Hey, did you ever hear a tune on a harmonica called A Fox Chase with the

dogs and everything in it?

A fox? No, we haven't.

We've been here two hours and a half. How much longer do you suppose you have

to wait for him?

Oh, hey, Sonny. Say, did you ever hear a fella play a harmonica three different

ways and end up playing it with his nose?

With his nose?

You didn't ask me.

We didn't...

Don't

mind me. I'm a heavy sleeper.

Not exactly, but it's an idea.

Are they nice and ripe?

They ain't nothing else but.

All right, give us three. All right.

He ought to. He's got the biggest feet in Crock County.

The bigger the feet, the better the kick.

Hey, are you thinking of... Brother, I'm not thinking. I'm praying.

Don't be scared, Amos.

They're friendly.

Howdy, folks.

Glad to meet you, Amos.

Why?

How'd you like to go to college?

What for?

I ain't done nothing.

It's a chance to get an education, and it won't cost you a cent. Yeah, we'll

get you a scholarship.

All that for free? Absolutely.

No fooling? Cross my heart.

Oh, shucks. I got enough book learning.

You ain't neither.

Shut your mouth before I smack you down.

You could study agriculture, Amos.

What do I want with that?

I'm going to be a farmer.

You can meet some nice girls at college.

Oh, shucks.

Oh, Amos is scared of girls. I hate not.

I could introduce you to a lot of lovely girls.

With shoes on? Sure, and stockings, too.

Huh? Oh, gee whiz.

Does this here college place give folks singing lessons?

Oh, yes, we have a fine department of music.

And they teach hog calling.

Amos, you're a going and I'm a going with.

I aim to learn to sing proper. Now, looky here, Sari. Now, you know how I

can sing.

Do you all want to hear?

That's my Sunday dress.

I allows how you better take your shoes along.

Don't you think? Oh, yes, by all means. Come on. We'll be right back.

Oh, please, hurry.

C.

Hey!

Betsy!

Come on, Amos, come on.

Terry, Laura, come on, I want you to meet the code.

Betsy! Wait a minute.

Where were you last night? Oh, Nick's on the drama.

Amos, come here.

This is it, Amos. Isn't this a great place?

Go ahead, throw it, Amos. Yeah, here.

It ain't got much heft to it.

Where'll I heave it to?

Oh.

You see that light down there?

Uh-huh.

Throw it at that.

Go ahead, throw it.

What's the matter?

Oh, shucks. What's wrong, Amos?

Amos wants to know if it's all right if he takes off his shoes.

Tell him he can take off anything he wants.

Go ahead, Amos.

I kind of like to feel my toes get a hold of the earth. That's perfectly all

right. Go ahead.

What's the matter now?

I'm scared I'll bust that light.

You do and I'll eat that football.

Go ahead, Amos. Show him.

Someone got a ball?

Here.

Try that other light. Go ahead, Amos.

I'm supposing I'll bust that one, too.

It's okay. This one's on the house.

Come on. Give them a little room, boys.

Hey, brother, you're a whiz.

Oh, it weren't nothing.

That's a big light.

You know, now don't you go trying to teach him how to play football.

You better hurry up and enroll him. Enroll him?

Holy smoke.

What's the matter?

I wonder if he's eligible.

Oh, sure he's... Certainly he... What?

Oh.

What a break.

We finally find the greatest football passer in the country, and he can't get

into college.

And this stoop has been here seven years and can't get out.

Are you socially aggressive?

He's socially offensive.

Get out of here.

What are you doing with these?

Spreading the message of intellectual freedom.

This might get you into trouble.

We martyrs fear nothing.

I spent two months in a jail in New Jersey.

What for?

I crashed a brick through the window of a bank.

The capitalistic faculty at Bradley expelled me.

But I shall carry on here.

Tomorrow, after I've enrolled, my work begins in earnest.

You haven't enrolled yet? No.

Have you got your credentials?

Oh, yes.

They're in perfect order.

You bet.

Anybody could get in college with credentials like these.

Boys, take good care of Herbie.

TSU needs him.

Brothers, I can't tell you how delighted I am to find myself among such splendid,

intelligent sympathizers in our cause.

The time has come!

Hello? Hello, is this Judge Fleming?

Speaking. This is Chip Carson.

Look, would you settle a little argument that we're having here?

Well, what is it?

Could a fella get 60 days for tossing a brick through the bank window?

You know, like, say, the big plate glass one on College Street.

That's just exactly what I'd give him, 60 days.

Fine. Thanks, Judge. Thanks very much.

Hey, Red, Jimmy, come here. Come here, quick.

Listen, fellas, all we gotta do is... Read these carefully, boys.

We are the rising generation of metal giants who will loose the ties that bind

us. As sure as my name is H. Terwilliger Van Dyke.

Wait a minute.

What did you say your name is?

H. Terwilliger Van Dyke.

Can you prove it? Sure he can.

Show him your credentials.

Take a look at those.

H. Terwilliger Van Dyke?

H. Terwilliger Van Dyke?

Why, that name sounds vaguely familiar.

So you're the guy they sent to try and help us start the revolution?

Who? You. Me?

Yes, you. Not me. Oh, yes. Oh, no.

Now, don't deny that you're the guy they sent to start the revolution.

Who? You. Me? Yes, you. Not me. Oh, yes. Oh, no.

We need a leader with a brain like yours as the moving spirit of the faction.

For years we waited till the time was right, but tonight we're going into

action. The rich, the more shall bleed us.

Van Dyke is here to lead us. Stop bellowing, stop bellowing. The chief has

come and freed us.

Down with everything. That's the flaming credo of the anti-super-pooper-duper

-commu-vulture radicals. Down with everything.

Loosen your libido with the contra-neo-geo-pio-demi-public.

You said you're red, that's what you said, but we said you're not red enough.

We want you as a brother, cause we're all against one another.

Down with everything, that's the burning slogan of the anti-super-pooper-duper

-commu-vulture radicals. At last we found a man of steel to lead the cause

to victory.

Thumbs down on all the classes. We must protect the masses.

From monarchy.

And anarchy. We'll turn things upside downarchy.

Should we pay tax and break our backs for comradeship and supper? No! Should

we have pie and scotch and rye, which they don't have enough of? No!

The rich get rich, the poor get kids, which makes it four times tougher. But

comes the rebel... Revolution and let them all eat cake. Hey, can we stand

here as thousands cheer and happy days are brewing? No, if you should fail to

land in jail, do we know what we're doing? No, we just forgot exactly what

it was that we're pursuing.

But comes the revolution and everything is jaded. Pick up your mind, is it yes

or is it no, sir? You're the boss and you must show it. Now the time is

drawing closer. Get the brick, he's gonna throw it.

Get the brick, he's gonna throw it. Get the brick, he's gonna throw it. Get the

brick, he's gonna throw it. Get the brick, I'm gonna throw it! Down with

everything, nothing ever satisfies. The anti-suma-pupa-dupa, come you vulture

radicals. Down on everything, even we ourselves despise. The counter-fassy,

streamlined chassis, who knows what's a matter goes.

Three cheers for Van the Superman, he loves the proletariat. Knock, knock!

Who's there? It's Reva!

Reva who?

Reva!

Hey, here's the brick. Where's the bank? Remember, in case you're arrested, your

name is John Smith. Right, and tonight...

I wouldn't know you if I hadn't known who you were.

Me neither.

Where did you get all those clothes,

Sari? Laura gave them to me. She did?

She's very nice, Amos.

My name isn't Amos.

It is, too.

It's another, not no more.

Then what is it?

Herbert... What does it say there?

Chip wrote it down for me.

Herbert Van Dyck.

Dyck, that's it. Herbert...

Van Dyke.

Well, call my hogs. Ain't that a name?

Where'd you get it?

Chip give it to me. For her to play this here football with.

Then my name's gotta be Van Dyke, too, ain't it?

Uh-huh, I reckon so.

Come on.

Van Dyke.

Gonna get me a high-tone front handle for that.

I got it.

Huh? Murine.

Murine? Well, that's right fancy.

Where'd you get that?

Off in a bottle.

Ha ha.

Hello, Van Dyke. Hello.

Hello.

Whoa.

So that's what kept him out last night. The little devil. She must be rooting

for Yale.

Get a load of that.

When she gets through, then they'll have to plow him under. You're not kidding.

Hello.

What's the matter? He's cutting in. I'll have to dance with him.

With both of us?

No. We'll dance around, and you cut in on us, see?

Oh.

I thought you didn't want to go to this dance.

I changed my mind.

Don't kid me.

You've fallen for that hillbilly just because he got his picture in the paper.

Oh, have I?

Guess I better take this back to the jeweler.

For me?

It was.

Oh, Morty, darling.

and I'll go on home. Where's Sally?

Oh, I don't know.

Go get her.

Oh, Mr. Van Dyke. Huh? You haven't danced with me yet.

Well, gosh, I don't feel much like dancing no more.

Where's Tommy?

Pacific Ocean has a different and terrific motion.

You can't do that, Amos. Yes, I can.

Folks like me and Sari don't belong here no how.

I'm a-waiting for her now. And soon as she gets here, we're tracking back home.

Now, look, Amos.

You wouldn't throw us down like this, would you, old man?

Everybody's depending on you.

Why, we can't get along without you, Amos.

Oh, I reckon some folks around here can get along without me.

Who? What do you mean?

I'd rather not say.

It's kind of personal.

Why, it isn't Sally, is it?

Well, I ain't saying it is, and I ain't saying it ain't. Amos, why, that little

flirt is nothing but an ordinary little... You shut your mouth, Chip.

You can't talk that away about the gal I love.

Now, you be getting on out of here. Well, Amos, I didn't mean to... I said

you get!

Hello, Mrs. Winters. How are you?

Is the coach in?

Oh, yes.

Oh, hello, Chip.

Bad news, coach. Amos is going home.

I thought you said... What?

Don't break up Houchette. Why is he leaving? On account of Sally. She gave

him the air.

Well, can't you make her listen to reason? She won't budge. And what's

more, she knows who Amos is and threatens to spill the beans. There goes

Yale. It's a jinx. I give up.

We can't give up.

You city people don't realize what this Yale game means to our little college.

It's more than just a football game.

It's our chance to show the whole country that a college doesn't have to

be big to be good.

This isn't only TSU's fight. We're fighting for all the small colleges that

haven't got thousands of students and millions of dollars, but are just as

good as your Yales and Harvards and Princetons, and they're all watching us

and pulling for us. We can't let them down. We gotta win.

I'm with you, son.

Nobody's quitting now, not after that speech.

It's a lucky thing for him you're not selling pianos. Come on, stupid, think

of something. We've got to keep Amos here.

How? By breaking his leg?

Down, little flirt.

She even flirted with you at the dance.

Yeah, but I didn't flirt back.

But you will.

You just make love to her. Oh, but I can't do that.

Besides, I'm out of practice.

You're telling me.

Well, what's your idea, Mrs. Winters? Stick around, you'll learn something

they don't teach in college.

Gee, I never won a football game this way before.

Oh, Bessie, honest, I don't want to do this.

You'll do it and like it.

All right.

What's Sally's address?

Well, she lives on Bird Street. I think the number is... 1216.

It's 1218.

Sari!

Sari!

Murine!

You...

Well,

give him a little time, not too much.

Sweetheart, darling.

Why would you work fast?

Well, I'm in a hurry. I mean, I'm a kind of a busy man.

You know, I've never been out with a coach before.

Neither have I.

I mean, I... He's really enjoying it, the rat.

My wife's all right, but she just doesn't understand me.

I wondered how a good-looking man like you could be stuck with a crow like her.

Yeah, me too.

Yeah.

Bessie, I mean, Sally, you're wonderful.

You do something to me.

This thing has gone far enough.

What is it? Ah, so I've got you at last.

Now, wait a minute, honey. I can explain everything. Oh, yeah? Well, explain

this.

practically engaged.

Suck me so hard, did you?

Come on, let's go this way.

Isn't it exciting? Why, the whole town's here to see us all. I only hope they're

all here when we come back.

Statement for the presence of Winters?

Why, uh, yes.

Uh, you can quote me as saying, uh, as Coach Winters boarded the train for New

Haven, he said, my players are in fine physical and mental condition and, uh,

will fight to the last man for Texas.

And on the, uh...

Should lose?

to sail into town.

We'll overpour the bowl. We'll long for a goal and then we'll score a touchdown.

There's no one in Texas who really suspects us coming home without...

is coming your way.

east and west I've gone in my quest for

to see the little team from Perry fight it out with the Yale Bulldogs.

While the weatherman says it's fair and warmer, it feels to me like it's

freezing and getting ready to snow.

But maybe I'm just a little thin-blooded. The Yale team has already

come onto the field, or perhaps I should say the four Yale teams.

They're running through their signals, and those boys look a little too big and

tough for these Texas lads to handle.

And here come the Texas boys back onto the field again.

It's snowing.

Yeah, and it isn't going to help us any.

morning opportunity.

We're going to camp.

Top quarter. Those fighting Texans more than holding their own. Gale has the

ball. Third down and four to go. And ladies and gentlemen, what I mean is

really snowing a snowstorm.

Looks like Gale's going to kick.

Yes. They're in punt formation.

Long punt formation. Cooper back.

Prescott!

and very good too. To review the play, Van Dijk faded back, tossed a long

cannon pass to Mather, and boy, how this Van Dijk can throw him. Mather snagged

it and tossed a lateral to Connors, who ran across the goal line standing up for

a touchdown.

Now, they're lining up to try it for the extra point.

He missed it. Oh, who cares? We've just started scoring.

It's a great game, isn't it?

Yeah.

And there goes the gun ending the first half of this terrifically exciting

gridiron battle. The score, Texas six, Yale nothing, providing one of the

biggest upsets of this season. The Texans, who weren't given a chance, have

played magnificently. In the second quarter, the weather has slowed down

their...

I thought you were making up all that stuff about their passing. Well, can I

help it if they believe everything they read?

Oh, you...

Now,

folks, four of our boys will sing a song written especially for this occasion.

Would you like to hear it?

sing that song here. It don't fit. We didn't expect this. When you listen to

me, fellas, you can't embarrass me in front of all these people. Now go in

there and sing it. Sing it good.

We

brought

the Texas sunshine here with us.

Isn't it fine? Look at it shine. There isn't a cloud up in the sky. The Texas

sunshine brings good.

We can't be beat. We're here to do what I, the boys of TSU, are western men

who've come to pull that bulldog's tail.

Hey, Texas, you son of a gun, we brought the sun, the sweat, the boo, the boo,

the lullaby.

When western men meet eastern men, there's bound to be a storm.

But in the west, we're at our best with the weather's nice and warm.

So if the day was cold and gray, we'd have no chance to win. But it's not.

Because it's hot and we're starting to tell you again. We brought the Texas

sunshine here with us.

Isn't it fine? Look at it shine. There isn't a whole sight here with the Texas

sunshine.

Morris, come here.

Go in for Van Dyke.

Morris,

Van Dyke.

Can you get the sound to the Texas coach?

But lady, I... It's very important.

given up the offensive and is going to try to protect that six-point lead.

Yale's ball.

Well, friends, this is certainly one for the book. It's fourth quarter, and the

Yale team hasn't been able to reach the Texas goal line. The score is still

Texas six, Yale nothing.

15 yards of piling on, and it puts Yale right down there within scoring

distance. And if they're ever going to score, now's the time.

Hey, you, come here.

What's the big idea, Robin?

Hey, you, one more crack like that, and I'll penalize you another 15 yards.

Where do you think you are, anyway, in Texas?

to stand as I've ever seen. But they're in a tough spot now.

And here comes the big moment of this man's football game. The score is tied 6

-6. Gale is lining up in front of those goal posts, and Evans is going to try to

put that soggy, slippery pink skin between those uprights for that one

little point that Gale needs to win.

The ball is tapped.

need a snowshoe.

Fifteen yards.

It's a penalty.

Yes, Doc.

Five yards.

Ten.

Fifteen yards.

What for?

How do I know?

Maybe it's my poor spelling.

Isn't that awful?

The Texas team has penalized 15 yards for unsportsmanlike conduct from the

Texas bench.

And that looks like it's about the end of your old ball game.

We haven't got a chance. We haven't...

Van Dyke's sitting down in the mud. Do my eyes deceive me?

No, sir. He's taking off his shoes and stockings. Why, it's a sight you may

never see again. The stories about him must be true. He likes to feel his toes

grip the earth.

He's getting ready to put everything he has into one long pass.

The timekeeper has his gun ready to end the game.

Van Dyke's getting up now.