All language subtitles for Boston.Legal.S02E26.DVDRip.XviD-FoV

Previously on Boston Legal.

I don't fear death, but I am afraid
of being hooked up to a machine.

If it came to that,
I would pull your plug.

Pull the plug?
I want you to shoot me.

"Professor Clifford Cabot's
Cabinet of Sexual Curiosities. "

I intend for it to be
my legacy to the world.

I need a favor. I want you to find out
if my daughter is using drugs again.

- I'm Rachel.
- I'm Brad. Nice to meet you.

- Have you made contact with Rachel?
- She's been clean five years.

- Denise Bauer, attorney, Daniel Post.
- Guy dying of cancer.

- You're going off like a dog.
- What do you mean?

When a dog knows it's gonna die,
it goes off into the woods by itself.

Imagine killing somebody
you deeply love.

- You said you'd do it for me. You promised.
- I don't know that I could.

- We had sex. Incredible sex. And that's it?
- Yes.

- If you're okay with the way things were, so am I.
- Just friends.

- Just friends.
- Friends with benefits.

Alan, Marlene Stanger.
Marlene, Alan Shore.

I look forward to working
with you, Miss Stanger.

Marlene is
a first-rate lawyer.

- She stole my case.
- I thought we could do better.

You're not gonna get far at Crane, Poole &
Schmidt pulling the crap you did with this case.

Cancel the rest of your week.
I'm taking you to Nimmo Bay.

- I want to take you to my spa.
- What are you doing in my bed?

- I don't know!
- You don't know?

Anything Denny can do, I can do
backwards wearing high heels.

- Who are we?
- Denny Crane.

- Alan Shore.
- Leaders of men.

With bull's-eyes
on our asses.

What the hell? Paul, stop them.

Security's been called.

- Oh!
- Oh, dear.

This could be my fault.
I seem to have mated them both.

Yes, I did, all right.
Jane? Sheila? Whoa!

- Alan, this is absolutely-
- All right, break it off!.

Wrong, yes. Office policy manuals and such.
I know, Shirley.

- But you'll just have to cut me
some slack this time of year.

- This time of year?
- It's spring. I'm in heat.

- I hear you're in heat.
- It seems so.

Me too. We must be on the same cycle.
What do you do when you're in heat?

Generally, I have
a good deal of sex.

- Me too. Where?
- Out and about.

- You mean right here in Boston?
- It's the most convenient locale.

Don't do that, man. The women in Boston
are pale this time of year...

and they haven't lost
their winter fat.

Like spring snow, Boston women
have their own particular benefits.

Nonsense.
You come with me to California.

It's spring all the time there. I have some
business to do with the Los Angeles office.

We'll have time to prowl all we want,
and we can write the whole thing off.

Denny, in all modesty, my state of heat
doesn't generally require me to prowl.

Women have a tendency
to find me.

Let them find you in L. A.
Don't be difficult. You know we're going.

We'll take thejet, grab a limo...

drop by Crane, Poole & Schmidt Los Angeles,
do a little business.

Then we'll check into
Ch�teau de Mer.

They have that luxury down bedding
with the 500-thread cotton sheets.

- Women love that high thread count.
- As do I.

- You mean I've convinced you?
- I do have a hankering for some strip-mall sushi.

Yes, the thread count
put me over. A few days.

I'll make some calls.

I was doing research.

At a motel
with a prostitute.

- I promise you, I've done nothing licentious.
- Me neither.

I was cultivating case studies, conducting
interviews with ladies of the eve...

for my survey of Victorian sexual mores
versus present day.

Me too.

- Clifford.
- Oh, my God. You don't believe me.

She was naked
during the interview.

- It looks suspicious.
- It was a demonstration speech.

The art of seduction vis-�-vis
clothing removal. Just ask LaFonda.

Look, Clifford.
It doesn't matter what I think.

You've got your story.
You're sticking to it. I will post bail.

- Shirley.
- Yes?

Could you see about getting
my shoelaces back?

Yeah.

Now, the concepts of sufficiency of evidence
and weight of evidence are different.

- Now, a prime example is
the Commonwealth vs. Tompkins.

- Yes?
- Brad, Beth Guttman on line two.

- Tell her I'm in a meeting. I'll call her right back.
- She said it was an emergency.

It's my sister.
This will just take a minute.

Yeah, Beth, what's up?

What?

When?

Yeah. Yeah, okay.
Okay, I'm on my way.

Don't let her say a thing
until I get there.

- Brad.
- Beth. What happened?

Hannah was at this party.
Kids were-There were drugs.

And this one boy...
died of an overdose.

Denny, you-

- Good Lord.
- Does this make me look fat?

Yes.
Wear heels.

Don't do this. You know you can't
handle Los Angeles.

- I'll be fine.
- Every spring you take this little trip out west...

and then we spend every summer, fall,
and winter trying to get the charges dropped.

If you're referring
to the Vanna White incident...

there was contributory
negligence on her part.

You groped her rear end during the whole
buffet line at a cocktail party.

How exactly
was she negligent?

Her tushy! Legally it's called
an attractive nuisance.

Look, if you are sincerely concerned about
my dalliances in Los Angeles...

there's one way
to prevent them.

Come with me.
You know how I feel about you.

Mmm. Your wet suit's doing
all the talking.

Bogey and Bacall had Paris.
You and I can have Los Angeles.

- We can take the first flight out.
- Denny, every year I threaten.

Every year I cajole.
All I have left is to plead.

If you care about me,
don't make me plead.

Denny Crane does not
make promises.

But, for you, I will try
and be a good boy.

Thank you.

How did you get into
that thing anyway?

A lot of Vaseline, and Chuck
in Word Processing helped.

Poor Chuck.

I hope he'll help me
get out of it.

- She doubled the client's money.
- Denise was there too.

- I thought that was the case you settled at 10.
- Well-

- You make a great team.
- Every team needs a great closer.

- One of you is funny. Funny helps with clients.
- Her?

- Thanks, guys.
- Too bad you're both up for partner.

- Spring vote.
- Always a lot harder.

- This place is so sexist.
- Four spots.

- No way they're gonna give two to women.
- You should team up.

Whoever makes it this time can
then vote for the other one next time.

I'm just gonna run in
and grab a seat.

That's what you should do. And then the other
one can just buy you dinner or something.

We won't know what the boy
died of until after the autopsy.

More than likely a bad mix
of prescription medications.

- What are you talking about?
- Have you ever heard of"pharming" parties?

- No.
- Not "farming" with an "F," but a "P-H."

It's what kids are doing
as oflate.

They go to their parents' medicine cabinets,
find leftover prescriptions-

pain medicines for backaches, sleeping pills,
even their own medications for A. D. D.

They take all these
pharmaceuticals, get together...

trade 'em, mix them into
various medication cocktails...

just to see what kind of fun
can be had.

This poor kid more than
likely got a bad mix.

- Do you know about this?
- First I'm hearing.

The kids were smart to dump the pills
down the toilet.

But we found the prescription bottles,
labels missing, in the trash out back.

Hannah would never be involved in anything
like that. She's already on an antidepressant.

- She knows better than to mix it with anything.
- Hannah's on antidepressants?

She's had clinical
depression for two years.

- She won't tell me anything.
- The other kids aren't talking.

But the D. A.'s not gonna let this one go.
Someone's going to jail.

I'll talk to her.

- Cut your hair since Christmas.
- Yeah.

We've got a long road
ahead of us.

And I realize you're
probably still in shock...

but, as you can see, we've got a little bit
of a problem here.

Besides Ryan being dead?

Now, I understand you lost a friend, Hannah.
But Ryan's parents also lost a son.

And they are not gonna stop,
nor should they...

until they find out exactly
what happened last night.

Right now, as we're talking, all your other
friends are with their attorneys...

who are advising
them to speak up.

And the first one to speak up is gonna
make a deal with the district attorney.

Everyone else is gonna take responsibility
for the crime...

and someone is going to go to jail.

Hannah, I know
you're a good person.

I know you're a good friend.

But this is the one time you
need to think of yourself first.

Um, the Strom trial doesn't begin until
the fall so we can discuss that at a later date.

- Denise, what have you got?
- Uh, the Pretzer deposition starts Monday.

Plus I'm still negotiating
on Friedman versus Langston.

- And, oh, Paul needs help on McCush and Wasson.
- Full load.

- Very full. Lots of billables, but I'm handling it.
- Good.

- In that case-
- I'm available.

Excellent. So you're with me
on the Clifford Cabot case.

Okay, people, that does it.
Thank you very much.

Marlene, you're typing
with such intensity.

Almost as though there were
some imminent climax.

She's on antidepressants.

I had no idea. I thought we were close.
Suddenly we're Ordinary People.

You're holiday close.
You get together for the biggies.

You know, Christmas, Easter,
share some laughs, old stories.

And there's something really
comforting about that.

But in between the jokes...

that's where stuff like
"Hannah's got clinical depression" hang out.

I mean, how do you share
something like that?

Plus, it's Hannah's
private business.

Not anymore.
It's like we've been strangers for years.

Do they know
everything about you?

Brad?

- Can I, um-
- Hey, Beth.

They arrested her.
One of the kids talked.

He said it was all Hannah's fault,
that she organized the whole party...

that she brought
all the drugs.

- I know that's not true.
- Where is she now?

Rick's arranging bail.

This is my world.
Welcome to it.

Current research from the top
academics in my field...

at the most prestigious
universities in the country.

"Sex and Love in the Time
of the Booty Call. "

"Buzz Off: A History of Anti-Vibrator
Legislation in the United States. "

All legitimate papers presented at
the Yale Sex Week Symposium last month.

You know, you have
a way about you.

Anyhoo, the paper that I'm working on,
entitled "Low As a Ho:

Privileging Sexual Purveyors
and the Fallacy of Phallocentricism"...

could only be made possible
through field research.

Which is what I was doing
when accosted by the fuzz.

Clifford, I think you can understand how
the police might have mistaken your intentions...

and let their imaginations
get away from them.

And that's their problem. Finally, our
universities are making great strides...

in understanding
the human sexual condition.

Graphic sexuality has become
ubiquitous in modern society.

It's irresponsible
not to teach young people about it.

- These are for real.
- You're kidding.

As whacked-out as some of these
things sound- no offense, Clifford-

- they're all legitimate scholarly research articles.
- Exactly.

Research which required
extensive interviews.

My cousin went to elementary
school with the D. A.

I think we've got enough here to go to him
and get these charges dropped.

I like her.

That's not how it happened.
They're lying.

Then you have to tell the truth. These kids
are doing exactly what is expected of them.

They're acting
in their own self-interest.

Hannah, you must understand,
you could go to jail for this.

They are charging you
with second-degree murder.

No. No.

- Okay.
- Casey.

Casey, when you're finished
perusing, please note...

that what our client had on his mind was
purely "Q" and "A" for research purposes only.

- There was no intent to solicit.
- Oh, no intent, huh?

You guys want to let us
in on the joke?

We found that
Professor Cabot...

in doing his "research,"
was extremely thorough.

Check it out.

Show me-Show me the plight
of the exploited sex worker.

Oh, and show me your ass.

- Oh, dear Lord.
- Check it out. She's about to graduate magna cum laude.

- Tell me your quim is quivering.
- What's a quim?

Can you believe she didn't
know what a quim was?

- Clifford.
- I know. It's awful. Pure misery.

- What do we do?
- Plead this out. Take your lumps.

I can't do that.
My reputation is at stake.

If I plead guilty, there goes
my entire academic career.

You should've thought of that before you
hired Eliza Doolittle to polish your knob.

Okay, Shirley, yes, I'm guilty.
Put me in shackles.

- Let's not go there.
- But I really did go to that motel for research.

Only, this time, LaFonda
looked so inviting.

Her smile told me everything
was gonna be all right.

Then I got carried away.

Shirley, I'm mortified
to admit this...

but I hadn't been intimate
with a woman for years.

My wife left me
emotionally and sexually...

long before we
ever parted ways legally.

And loneliness...

well, it isn't something
you can just think your way out of.

Clifford, how many of these
interviews have you done?

With this latest study, 11.

But this is the first time anything
inappropriate has ever happened.

Ooh, maybe it's the third.

We're sunk.

- This will stop.
- What will stop?

You and your little games.
They're a distraction and they will stop.

What do you
suggest instead?

We're going to make love.

You're going to give me
everything you've got.

We're going to get this
out of our system.

It will be kept between
the two of us, and then we will move on.

- Sounds very organized.
- Cut the nonsense. Are you in or not?

I'm very much in.

However,
I have some thoughts.

First, I'm a bit old-fashioned
when it comes to certain women.

I prefer to do the stalking.

- You've got 24 hours.
- I certainly won't be timed.

- I think you're vile.
- That's a very good sign.

For some, it takes quite
a while to reach that point.

But you seem
very in touch...

with the worst that
the world has to offer.

You've always been
a very bad girl.

Now you're working
up to awful...

and you think I'm just
the lucky lad to get you there.

You might just be right.
As long as it's messy...

and hurts just a bit.

Just as soon as I return
from Los Angeles.

This has a familiar
feel to it.

Oh, I forgot. You haven't been
to this branch. How are you?

Denny Crane.
I'm a big believer in consistency.

Whether you kill someone
in Boston, New York, Chicago-

Denny Crane-

L. A., London, Tokyo,
you'll feel right at home here.

Oh, my God.

- So I'll messenger those contracts to you this afternoon.
- Perfect. Thank you.

- Miss Reese, Denny Crane.
- Hello.

I'm sorry. The Denny Crane.
Crane, Poole & Sperm- Schmidt.

May I say that I have seen every single one
of the episodes of Night Bay.

- Thank you.
- And I wonder, how can they keep this thing going?

But, you know,
night swimmers need protection too.

And drug smugglers who thrive
under the cloak of darkness.

And this is my colleague,
Alan Shore.

- A pleasure, Ms. -
- No.

He doesn't watch television.
I doubt he's even seen...

the sex tape
your boyfriend filmed of you.

- I have to go now.
- Oh.

Bye-bye.

- I love L. A.
- Denny Crane!

- Son of a gun, how are you?
- Hey, good. Good.

- Barry Goal.
- Alan Shore. How do you do?

Senior partner,
Crane, Poole & Schmidt L. A.

- Barry Goal.
- You said that.

- Denny Crane West, almost.
- Got it.

Barry Goal.

Docket number 52893.
Commonwealth versus Hannah Guttman...

- on the charge of second-degree murder.
- Great.

- How do you plead?
- Not guilty, Your Honor.

- Bail?
- Defense requests R. O. R.

Hannah's parents can take
responsibility for her.

The defendant is charged
with second-degree murder. Bail.

That's way out of whack, Your Honor.
This case is involuntary manslaughter at its best.

- You're gonna tell me how to file?
- She's overcharging, Your Honor...

hoping we'll plead
for manslaughter.

An innocent boy is dead,
Your Honor. Forgive me for taking it seriously.

All right. The defendant
has no prior record.

I'm gonna release her into
the custody ofher parents.

Conference with
the clerk for scheduling.

Hannah?

- You're not going to look at us?
- Let's go.

You killed our son, you're not
going to even look at us?

Did you take care of what we talked about?

Just as you requested.
All the amendments to your living will...

have been incorporated
per your specifications.

- We just need the proper signatures.
- Excellent.

Andjust so you know,
we did a search.

And there's no place that will legally sanction
euthanasia by bullet to the brain.

- Aw. Chest?
- Sorry.

The most you can hope for
is a slow morphine drip...

or counting on Alan here
to pull your plug.

- Excuse me?
- Denny has amended his living will...

to grant you power of attorney so you can
enforce the D. N. R. clause...

just in case, uh,
you know-

Since Cap Weinberger died,
I need someone else to pull my plug.

You're up, Alan.
I got a slot open. Hancock?

I'm sorry, Barry. We'll have to take care
of this another time.

We are so screwed on
the Clifford Cabot case.

Really? Oh, I'm sorry. And you were so eager
to get on that one too.

I know! I thought we had
a real strong argument...

that his encounter with the crazy hooker
was just part of his crazy academic research.

But it turns out
he videotaped the whole thing.

- H-He videotaped it?
- Yeah.

It's not one of those blurry night vision videos.
This one is crystal clear.

But the important thing
is... he filmed it.

He made a film.

A film which is protected
under the First Amendment.

Uh, Denise-

Paul, uh, I can't.
Not now.

Shirley, I had a thought.

Ride with me.

Get out!

No. No!

And if he filmed it for distribution...

to entertain an audience...

that's pornography, which is protected
under the First Amendment.

Good thinking.

What is that pounding?

This building has a lot of quirks.
Haven't you noticed?

I hate her.

Great.

I need your help.

Hannah, this is Rachel Lewiston.

- Hi, Hannah.
- Hi.

I'm just
gonna be out there.

Well, nothing awkward
about this, is there?

I'm sorry. But why
am I even talking to you?

Honestly? Because your
uncle's a little lame.

He thought
I could help you.

But the only thing I can
think to do is to tell you aboutJenny Diner.

- Who?
- She was a girl I met in rehab.

I was there recently.
Jenny's about your age.

Angry as hell.
We got along great.

There were other addicts there
who I had more in common with.

ButJenny and I, uh-
Well, we really understood each other.

I, uh-

I mentioned it to one of
the counselors one day.

He said he wasn't surprised.

They've done studies that show that drug and
alcohol abuse stunts your emotional growth.

Whatever age you start abusing,
that's the age you are, emotionally.

So even though I'm pushing the big 4-0,
and I'm raising a three-year-old...

in many ways I'm still 16...

which is why my father's stare
can still make me feel two feet tall...

and why my best friend
and confidant in rehab...

was a 16-year-old
hooked on heroin.

- I don't do drugs.
- Hannah...

I just want to tell you
the one thing I learned...

the really, really hard way.

And that is you have to
own your crap.

What you do,
what you say, who you hurt...

you have to own all of it.

And if you don't want to be stuck here
at age 16 for the rest of your life...

you're gonna have to
tell people what happened.

Your Honor, the defense's motion
to dismiss is absurd.

We have a videotape
which clearly shows that the defendant...

was caught fully...
in the commission of the illegal act.

It used to be called
in flagrante delicto.

But, uh, people don't speak
as colorfully anymore.

It's a damn shame too.
Ms. Stanger?

Professor Cabot was
indeed in that motel room.

He did purchase the services
of LaFonda Raymond...

and he did set up his camera
and make a videotape.

And that is why the charges
should be dismissed.

- Not following you, Ms. Stanger.
- Your Honor...

Professor Cabot was not engaged
in an act of prostitution.

He was in fact making
a pornographic movie.

And as a result, everything he did is protected
under the First Amendment.

- Oh, come on.
- Your Honor, Professor Cabot...

is a distinguished professor
and budding director.

- But unlike many other first time
independent filmmakers- - Please.

Professor Cabot comes to his subject
after years of study and research...

which will only serve to
broaden and deepen...

the potential impact
of his cinematic creation.

Wow.

I hope you can see through
this ridiculous smoke screen.

It doesn't matter if the defendant
is a professor or a bog worker.

It doesn't matter ifhe had 10 cameras
rolling the whole time.

The fact is he paid to have sex with
a prostitute, and that's against the law.

Your Honor, I have a witness
who will prove my argument.

Mr. Craven,
have you had a chance...

to look at the film
made by Professor Cabot?

- Yes.
- In your expert opinion as a filmmaker...

what is Professor Cabot
doing in the film?

Well, he's acting.
He's directing the action.

And of course,
he's screwing.

- As part ofhis performance?
- Yes.

So we have acting,
directing, cinematography.

If you include his humming,
he's doing the score.

- We're talking about a film here, aren't we?
- Oh, yes.

Now, I think we would all agree that
this isn't a particularly good film.

- Oh, boy.
- But let me ask you this.

Is this film, a film produced
and directed by Professor Cabot...

starring himself
and LaFonda-

- Is it the worst film you've ever seen?
- No.

Not by a long shot.

It was just stuff
from the drugstore.

Prescriptions.
It was safe.

No. Not for Ryan.

Everybody's on something.

I have friends who have to
take a pill to wake up...

to go to sleep,
to study.

- I need to take something to calm down before a test.
- I'm not here to judge.

Yes, you are.
Everyone is.

They're trying to pin this whole thing on me.
And I didn't organize the party.

- I didn't bring all the drugs.
- Okay.

But, um-

I gave Ryan the meds
that killed him.

I was just trying to
make him better.

You need to
explain this to me.

I can't. You don't know
what it's like to be depressed.

- Sure, I do.
- No, you don't.

Real depression
affects you physically.

You literally
can't get out of bed.

There's a weight pressing
down on you all the time.

You don't care if you eat, if you stink-
It's all too much.

And Ryan had it.

I told him to
talk to his parents.

They told him to study harder
and play sports after school.

Ryan was drowning,
and they couldn't see it.

The night of the party,
I swear...

I gave Ryan the exact dose
that I was taking.

He must've, you know, had something first
or was drinking or-

I don't know. He was allergic.
But he wasn't supposed to die though.

He wasn't supposed to die.
He wasn't supposed to.

So it's true? Wes Craven was your
ace in the hole?

Paul, she was brilliant. I know we're
not supposed to say clients are guilty.

- But this guy was guilty, and she got him off.
- Oh-

I'll see you guys.

Marlene, tell me more.

Shirley, I realize that there's no way that
I can say this without sounding petty.

But that whole
pornography%First Amendment rights thing...

- that was... my idea.
- Yeah, it sounds like you.

But, Denise...

she got to
the elevator first.

Denny Crane.

- Denny Crane.
- I sometimes forget that you're famous.

I'm well-known.

Courtney, over here.

What a small world.

- And what big-
- You knew she'd be here.

It's her favorite restaurant.
My God, they're beautiful.

- Courtney!
- Hey!

Hey, hey! Knock it! Give her space.

What's the matter with you?
Hey. Hey.

She's magnificent.
Ever see the show she hosts?

- It's called The Phoenix.
- Is it about mythology?

Oh, yeah. People will watch that.
No, it's a reality show.

They take these wrecked broads
and make 'em look, uh, pretty.

She could at least
have shared a drink with me.

- Why should she? You stalked her.
- I did not stalk her.

You found out where she eats.
You showed up. That's stalking.

All right.
Why are you still miffed at me?

- I'm not miffed, Denny.
- You're miffed enough to ruin my meal.

- I thought being my plug-puller
would be an honor. - It is.

I'm not saying I don't wanna be the one
to pull your plug.

I just felt the way the whole package
was presented to me was wrong.

I just told you
to sign my document.

Exactly. With something
as monumental as that...

you don't just push a piece of paper
in one's face.

- You discuss it first.
- We discussed it plenty of times.

You said you would shoot me.

There's a difference between talking
about it and signing a legal document.

You're a friggin' lawyer for God's sake!
That's what you do!

With others, yes.
When it comes to my personal life...

I don't actually sign contracts
at the drop of a hat.

When I say I'll do something, I do it,
regardless of a piece of paper.

- I expect people to hold me to my word.
- What's the matter with you?

People don't
do that anymore.

And you certainly can't expect the hospital
to acknowledge your word.

In this case,
I can see that.

Well, are you gonna sign
the damn thing or not?

Okay.

I apologize.

How about I ask you properly?

Okay.

Would you do me the honor
of killing me?

I will.

- Waiter. Champagne.
- Yes, sir.

This is just a nightmare.

It is, but... we've got a case.

Thank God.

Hannah had a very compelling motive
for giving Ryan those pills.

And I'm almost positive
that I can plead out.

Oh, she told you
she gave him the pills?

Yes. And I believe that
she was trying to help him.

And I think she can
convince the D. A. too.

Well, if she pleads guilty,
will she get probation?

No. It's-

She's probably gonna have to do
some time in a juvenile facility.

- Maybe a year.
- No, it would kill her, Brad.

- She's a sick girl.
- I'll get the best deal that I can...

but I'm certain it's gonna
involve somejail time.

A kid died, Beth.

What if she said
she didn't do it?

But she did it.

There were a lot
of other kids at that party.

That one, Jason, has
a prior drug conviction.

What if Hannah just
keeps her mouth shut.

- What are you asking me to do?
- I'm asking you to do what's best for your niece!

What's best is to tell the truth, get this
behind her and get on with her life.

No! What's best
is to keep her out of jail!

I'm not gonna pin this on some other kid
when I know that Hannah did it.

Then I'm getting
another lawyer.

- Hi, Denise!
- Marlene.

You know,
those girls were right.

- We really do make a pretty good team.
- Mmm.

I like the way we bounce ideas
off each other.

You know what they say, Marlene.
You can't beat an idea whose time has come.

And, Marlene,
your time is coming.

Does my mom know
we're having this conversation?

Hannah, your mother,
she likes perfect endings.

Tell me about it.

There's no
perfect ending here.

There's a lousy one
where a kid is dead.

You're held accountable, you end up serving
six months, possibly a year in jail.

And there's a catastrophic one
where a kid is dead...

you try to avoid
being held accountable.

You roll the dice,
you go to trial, you lose...

you end up serving three years,
possibly more.

Now this perfect life that your mother was so
determined for you to have, that's off the table.

- She's not seeing clearly on this.
- And you are?

I know the law.
And I know your mom.

Yes, I'm the one you should be listening
to right now.

Six months?

Juvenile.
Minimum security.

I may be able to do better,
but you gotta trust me.

Okay. This is going to look
like I am completely kissing your ass.

And I am. But look what I actually found
in the cold aisle at the grocery store.

- Schmidt Beer.
- Well, would you look at that.

- You know I'm good.
- You're very good.

I've spent nine years working my tail off
to make partner.

In three minutes, she comes in and tries
to take my spot.

- Marlene?
- Squid.

Ruthless,
horrible sea creature.

It's so unfair when
people like that win.

So don't let her.

Right. Hmm.

Hmm.

- What?
- You just kinda... broke it for me.

- Sorry.
- No. It's not your fault.

It's this thing
with my niece.

We're friends with benefits. This is supposed
to be our break from all those hassles.

I just can't let it go.

Maybe it would help if you didn't think
about it personally.

You know, if you thought
about it like an attorney.

- Okay.
- Brad...

nothing excites you
as much as the law.

- I know.
- So imagine yourself...

standing tall
in front of the jury box...

adrenaline pumping...

juices flowing.

The judge up there
with his gavel... banging...

banging...

banging.

- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah.

And I bet Marlene isn't
getting laid right now.

Alan, I want you to know,
we get back to Boston...

first thing I'm gonna do
is sign your living will.

- Be your plug-puller.
- You don't have to do that, Denny.

I wanna do that.

It meant a great deal to me when you agreed
to give me the- the big send-off.

It was a great show
of, you know, affection.

Of love.

You showed me yours,
now I wanna show you mine.

I certainly appreciate that.
But the fact is...

my living will, as it were,
is taken care of.

- We'll amend it.
- There's really no need.

- I want to.
- You don't have to.

- I want to.
- It's fine.

- It's not.
- I'm telling you it is.

I'm telling you it's not.

- What are we talking about?
- My living will.

Right. So first thing we get back,
I sign on as your plug-puller.

- Case closed.
- No.

Is there something you're not telling me.
Is there somebody else?

No. It's just
I've made my arrangements.

It's not a particularly pleasant subject to
revisit, so I'm gonna preserve the status quo.

- You don't trust me.
- I do trust you.

Not with this. Not with your life.
Waiter! Bring him the check.

Denny.

Your brain is so clogged up with big words, you
don't have room for the stuff that's important.

Trust in a friendship is a two-way street,
or there's no friendship.

A real friendship doesn't include one person
being positively giddy...

over the prospect of pulling the plug
on the other.

- I'm not giddy!
- You are.

I think part of you
really wants to be the guy who kills me.

- I just shot someone.
- It's over here!

- It's Courtney! Hey, Courtney Reese!
- Denny Crane.

- What happened?
- Everything's gonna be all right.

- Did you see what happened?
- Denny Crane.

Call 911.
Denny Crane.

Move aside. Get out of the way.
Denny Crane.

Who are you? Who are you?

Do you know what happened?

Who are you?

You stinker!