Original subtitles

So who the fuck we have on the bus today? This fucking homo back here.

Picking up your mom, bitch.

Homo soldier?

Get the homo soldier.

He's doing it for him.

Nice outfit, douchebag.

The fuck are you wearing, you fucking tard?

This guy is fucking... Nobody else is wearing it. This guy, yeah.

Damn right no one's wearing that shit.

Oh, man.

Hey, you want to pick up a really, really, really fat girl?

Yeah, you're not happy on the bus

Take a hike. He doesn't want pussy.

He keeps pointing at all these dudes.

I want that guy. I want that guy. But that guy doesn't want you, bro.

Yo, you got to stop. Oh, wait.

Oh, what the hell is that?

Oh, look at this right here. Look at this right here. Look at this. She's

with her boyfriend, dog.

What's wrong with this guy? I'm about to run his ass over.

Yeah, what the fuck happened?

I don't know, but all I heard from her was say, asshole.

Really? She said asshole? No, no, no. I just walked away from her, dog.

Where's the guy going? Yeah, I'm gonna talk to his chick.

So, what the fuck was that all about?

My fucking asshole boyfriend.

That's your asshole boyfriend?

Yeah. Are you okay?

Are you alright?

You need someone to call authorities?

That was your boyfriend, you said?

Yeah.

Really? That's my boyfriend.

Okay, so we should leave you alone then? Because I don't want him coming back

and... Yeah, just hang with it.

Hey, I'm not your boyfriend.

Oh, I know.

I'm not the guy you're arguing with.

What did he do to you? Are you guys arguing? You guys are pissed off? What's

going on?

He fucking cheated on me.

Oh, he cheated?

Yeah. Wow, such a pretty girl like you.

What the hell was he thinking?

I don't know. Some girl keeps texting him.

Really? She won't leave him alone.

And that makes you sad?

Yeah. Makes you pissed off? I'm pissed off.

Fuck him.

He's not picking up the phone or nothing.

So what are you going to do? I don't know. I mean, I called him.

Are you a bitch?

Huh?

Yeah. Yeah. All right.

Come here for a second.

So, he left you here. I mean, is he going to come back? I don't know.

He took the keys and everything.

The door is locked.

I can't get a hold of him.

What do you want to talk about?

I do relationship counseling.

No, I don't want to talk about it.

You're talking about it now.

I want to figure out why he left you and why he cheats on you.

I don't know. Maybe it's something that you're doing.

I'm not doing nothing wrong. Maybe it's the way you're dressing.

I think I look good, though.

Or maybe that's something you're not doing. You guys, I mean, do you

please him? Of course I please him.

Fucking small dick.

Oh, shit, she just put him out there.

Oh, so maybe that's the problem.

I think so.

He has a small dick. It's so fucking small.

Such an asshole.

You had a lot to say. Yeah.

He pissed me off.

Wow.

You're really pretty, man. You shouldn't be standing in this parking lot. Do you

need to ride somewhere? You shouldn't be standing in this parking lot by

yourself.

I don't know. I guess.

Yeah, fuck that.

Yeah? You want to ride? Yeah. I just live up the block.

Do you have anything? He locked the car?

Yeah. I can't get anything out.

Really?

Did you make sure it was locked?

You're so cute did he hurt you No, he didn't hurt me. He just fucking cheated.

He hurt your heart? Yeah, he hurt my heart.

I mean, how long were you with him?

I mean, I was with him for three years.

Three years?

Yeah.

Wow. So there's got to be a reason why he cheated. I don't know.

I please him. I do everything for him. I pay all his bills. He don't pay shit.

So it's just like...

You just found out recently?

I just found out just now.

Stupid bitch.

Say no, you don't want no scrubs. Has he done this before?

No, not that I know of, but I'm sure now that he has.

I mean, why not?

What the hell?

Kind of hurts a little bit?

Hurts a lot.

Yeah? Yeah.

If you don't mind me asking, did you have a good sex life?

Yeah, every day.

Sometimes three times a day. Every day?

Yeah.

Oh.

Okay.

Was it good?

No. His dick is too small.

His dick is small?

Yeah. It's like really small.

Really? You're putting him out there, huh? Yeah.

Fuck him.

What is he going to do now? You know we're going to put this on the internet

for everybody to see, right? Oh, really?

You know the best way to get over a dude

It's sex random

sex

Listen

I'm gonna help you out with that. Look, revenge, right? You wanna get revenge on

this douchebag?

Fuck yeah. You with him for what, three years?

Yeah. This fucking guy cheats on you? Yeah. Let's do it.

You're treating him good, right?

Giving him pussy all the time? Yeah. Right? Even with his small little dick?

Yeah. You know what I mean?

Right? Fuck, he's such an asshole, right? I know what you mean.

He's such an asshole, right? Don't you wanna get him back? Fuck yeah, let's get

him back.

Yeah, let's get him back, right? Let's do it. Yeah.

Come on, let's get that motherfucker back. Alright, let's go.

Scumbag, let's go. Yeah, let's go. Take off your shirt. Listen.

I can help you out with that, okay?

Let's do some fucking revenge sex, alright? Let's have some revenge sex.

I'll even pay you to make it even sweeter.

Pay me how much?

Does that really matter?

I'll give you a couple hundred bucks to fuck my friend right here, which is

great at revenge sex.

You know, a grudge fuck.

And then, you know, you fuck the shit out of him and that's it. You go home

happy thinking, hey, I don't give a shit what you did because I made money, I

fucked, it's all good.

Fuck yeah, let's do it.

We'll show this on the internet

I'll take

your shirt off

Mm, fucking hot. There you go.

Yeah, brush yourself with that money.

I like money.

You like money?

Yeah. Well, you're in the right van. That's for damn sure.

Well, you guys picked me out, so.

Right. Right time, huh? Right time.

So you want to tell, listen, we're going to make a little video for your ex. All

right. All right?

Be like, go ahead, give him a shout out. Shout out to you for being a fuck nigga,

and this is all the money I get. Oh, fuck nigga.

The best when you break up and you fucking so you haven't had any other

dick for like three years

Just his fucking kidding.

Put that money away.

Put it in your purse.

There you go. Oh my god, we gotta get you some dick, man. This is exciting.

Yeah, it is exciting. I'm pretty fucking excited over here.

Come on, what are you doing over there, dude?

Get over here.

See, look at it.

Commando fucking revenge sex.

Commando revenge sex to the rescue. So look, let me see. Go ahead. Go ahead,

reach over. Grab his dick.

First dick in three years.

First dick in three years.

So is his bigger than your boy, your ex's? I don't know.

You know what you gotta do to make it

bigger.

Shit don't suck itself.

Make sure you suck it better than you suck your ex's dick.

What was your ex's name, by the way?

Miguel.

Ah, Miguel.

Actually,

he does kind of look like your ex. I'm bald.

Kind of.

He looks like a Miguel.

Miguel, this is what happens when you cheat on your girl.

She ends up with a dick in her mouth.

That's right.

For money.

How good girls gone bad.

Sorry to say, Miguel, she looks like she's enjoying it.

Let go of it.

Those tits.

A little harder to swallow than Miguel's, huh?

Fuck you, Miguel.

Ain't nobody gonna miss you. Oh, man, what a fucking bitch.

That's got eye.

Sucia, huh?

Mm-hmm.

One of those relationships don't work out.

Because she's gangster.

She's a hoe.

Yeah, we're rather jerky than put in your mouth

Miguel's watching.

Look in the fucking camera, Miguel's watching. Miguel TV.

Yeah.

Look at Miguel, right in his eyes, what he's looking at. There you go.

Fucking dirty trip.

Trifling.

Just jumped on some random dick right away.

I wonder where he went right away. He's probably in a restaurant crying right

now. He's buying her a fucking card right now.

I'm sorry card.

Straight to the card.

I fucked up, I'm sorry.

Take me back.

She ain't gonna be by the car when he comes back.

Sit back.

That's nice. That was nice.

Watching this I think you will

Oh.

The girls shouldn't hate me, man.

I'm just helping them figure out the truth.

Just exposing this girl, that's it.

Yeah.

He's calling Miguel.

He's calling Miguel.

He's like, wait a minute. Where's Miguel?

Who's this dude?

His dick's so much bigger.

Say hi to Miguel.

Hi, Miguel. Hey, what's up, man?

Hi.

Hi.

What's up, buddy?

You like watching your girl get fucked?

Actually, you should tell him thank you.

No, I should tell him you're welcome.

I'm just helping him out.

Exposing the truth.

Right, what's the truth?

What's the truth?

Shout out to

this

good ass dick.

She definitely seems the type that would like your dick.

Hmm.

I need you to let him come on your face.

That really pissed Miguel off.

I'm going to give a shout out to the cum lords.

Tell Miguel you want him to come on your face.

I want him to come on my face, Miguel.

Do you?

Oh, yeah.

There you go.

I kind of missed the face of you, Shrek, but hey, I tried.

That's all right.

At least you got her revenge, right?

At least I got my revenge. Because your revenge tastes sweet. It tastes real

good. Literally.

How are your pineapples?

Tell me how that felt good.

That felt good, Miguel.

You mind?

Awesome.

That was...

That was good.

All right. So, all right.

Wow, look, that was awesome.

Yeah. So where's your house at?

Just like almost there. It's just up the block a little bit more. Up the block up

here? I know we stayed in the area, so.

I got a good driver.

He knows this area well.

So, you know what? You made it, what, a couple hundred bucks?

Yeah. We'll just round it off to 300.

And listen, I'll give you double that.

I just want to see you shake your tits.

No, but like outside. I want to get better light on you.

Is that cool?

That's cool. And I'll give you 600 bucks. How's that? That's fine. That's a

lot, right?

Yeah. That's fucking awesome.

Let's do it. Yeah, here, put your shorts on.

You know.

Good job.

All right, here you go.

Thank you.

There you go. You're going to need that. Yeah. But anyways, so listen, just hop

up and down.

All right, good.

Now hop on one leg.

One leg. There you go.

Put your arms in the air.

There you go. Wow, you're a good listener.

Now repeat after me.

You're like, hi, Miguel.

Hi, Miguel. I just got fucked on the bang bus. I just got fucked on the bang

bus. Hey, what the fuck is the bang bus?

What the fuck? Check your purse.

I got cheated on.