Original subtitles

Heavens to hilarity, this is it sports fans, participants even, television's

greatest array of stars, Laugh Olympics presents the round the world triple team

competition between the Yogi Yohuis, the Scooby Doobies, and the Really Rockies.

The players are on the field, in the stadium even, so let's get on with it,

Laugh Olympics.

Greetings, sports fans, and welcome to another thrill-a-second All-Star Laugh

Olympics. Today's super sports-a-rama will begin in frost-and-fun-packed

Canada.

Then we'll whisk you across the Atlantic to wondrous Warsaw, the pulse-setting

capital of Poland, for the fantastic finale of today's dynamic doings. Now

it's back to man for our first exciting event, the Royal Canadian Get Your Man

Contest. For the Yogi Yahoos, it will be Cindy Bear.

Teen Angel Taffy for the Scooby Doobies. And for the really rottens, their star

man getter, Daisy Mayhem.

Yes, folks, these Olympiads will be competing for the Black Olympics gold.

Snag here. And this is our man, a computerized robot programmed to evade

capture. Are you really a robot robot?

Shut up. Shut up. Listen.

Listen.

Relax, fellas, while I explain the event.

Whoever gets her man first wins a big 50-point first prize.

And there goes our man robot off for a head start.

All right, athletes, go get your tin can man, if you can.

There ought man on the trail, folks.

With the rockets hogging first place, the Scoobies are second with Taffy hot

on the trail. And finally, it's the Yogi's. But it looks like Cindy's hound

is sleeping on the job.

No problem, sugar.

My southern bloodhound can follow tracks even in his sleep.

See what I mean?

Our contestants have now planned out to get the robot.

That may not be too easy.

With Muttly as a decoy, weans will set up traps to make it easy as possible.

Bye, eh, Muttly?

Zoe! There he is!

Hot dog!

Our decoy plan's working.

And is Muttly gonna be surprised at the tramp I got sent for that Scooby?

Taffy's closing in on her man, folks, so this may be it.

Oh, too bad, Taffy. That's not the robot. You got her rotten.

Darn! It sure looks that way.

Son of a dozen dirty snarling, a queen of dozen...

Now, all three teams are closing in on their man.

But who will make the catch?

This may be it, folks.

The Scoobies almost have the robot and... Oh, hold it! Here come the

Yogi's. Now it's a two-way chase.

Oops! Make that a three-way chase as the rotten Jordan 2.

Goodness, could it be?

There's only one way to find out, Cindy.

Let's go!

Yes!

Sorry, gracious!

And now, first prize will be awarded to... See!

Desist! Daisy could have a bag of tricks.

Hey, you just watch and see, Snaggle Mush.

Hey, watch this.

The Scoobies and Yogis have caught their man, too.

But that's jealous.

There's only one robot, so there's something rotten here.

Possibly, Mildew, but if this is another rotten's roust, we'll soon see.

Son of a fussin' fags and dumperies. Ah-ah! It's Muddly and not the robot, so

it's no score for the rotten.

Therefore,

the 50-point winner, uh, winners are... The Scoobies and... the Yogi.

Since the Yogis and Scoobies both won, the 50 points will be split to give the

Yogis 25 and 25 to the Scoobies with a big fat Zilcho going to the run. For our

next event, we take you further north past the Arctic Circle for the Snow

Scorching Dog Sled Race.

Shaggy and Scooby-Doo for the Scoobies. And for the Rottens, it's Treadberry.

Suffering Snowballs.

It's a prehistoric hairy mammoth. A taskless one, even.

Task, task.

That oversized monster can't be a dog.

You're right, Mildred.

Rover isn't a dog. He's a puppy.

An abominable snow dog puppy.

It's a puppy.

When he grows up, he'll probably eat way back for a snack.

Sledders, to your sleds. For this event, the scoring will be the usual 25 points

for first, 15 for second, and 10 for last place.

So, get ready, set, and mush.

Fantastic. In a single step, puppies have flown into the lead.

Yogi's moved out in typical dog sledding fashion, while the Scoobies are sunk in

third.

I'm sorry, son.

Like no problem, Scooby-Doo. All you need is inspiration.

Like a Scooby snack.

Yeah.

Now speeding over the frozen wastelands, the Rottens are still first.

But the last place Scoobies have just passed the Yogi's to take the second

spot.

Thanks to Scooby-Doo's appetite, the Scoobies are gaining!

They won't pass us!

Tell them, Rover!

You didn't have to tell them that loud!

I'll see what you'll check, big mouth.

What a race, folks. The Rotten's are still hanging on to first place. And I

do mean hanging.

The Yogi's have regained the second spot, passing the Scoobies. But how will

they get over that crevice?

Shucks. We just crossed over that Rotten Dredd. That's all.

Blabber, quit draw.

That's using Dredd's head to put you in the lead.

You better hurry up if you want your friend!

Do something,

mutt!

Good boy!

Now start mushing!

is not only ridiculous, it's freezing.

So, whoa, Rover.

Whoa.

Much better.

Now, mush your ugly head off, mutt.

How about that, fans?

Now the Yogi's are first and the Scooby's are second. Here come the

buttons and pass.

Hey, I'll sled over thin ice.

Like I'm allergic to ice water.

Me too.

Got any ideas, Quickpaw?

Nope, but something will hit me.

What? Something did hit the yogis and the Scoobies, folks. That runaway snow

hill. Now here comes Dredd, but he's paying no heed to the danger thin ice

side.

If I heed it, every sign I read, I'd never get ahead.

Well,

Dredd, maybe this will teach you to heed signs.

Anyway, the Yogi's and Scooby's are still snowed in as they approach the

finish line.

Oh, this isn't a reporting job. It's a snow job.

Heavens! Speaking of snow, if we don't scoot, we'll all be snow-dead!

Undereat them!

Talk about a big finish!

Phew! Now the only problem is uncovering the winner.

Personally, I'd say it's anybody's guess in this mess.

Not for long, Mildew.

Lookie!

Yes, folks, we do have a winner. It's the Yogi's by four noses. The Scoobies

are second, and here come the third place Rattans.

Ratt, Ratt.

Talk about a cool character.

Anyway, now for a look at our halftime scores.

The winning Yogi's are ahead with 50 points. The Scoobies are second with 40,

while the Rattans are frozen out with 10 little ones.

Honestly, Miltu, there must be a less abominable way to reach our next locale.

Tish-tosh, Snag.

Anything to get us away from those silly savages.

Besides, the rover's not so abominable once you get to know him. It's not the

abominable snow puppy who's so abominable.

It's the abominable puppy's abominable snowman master.

Help! Stop the show!

I want to get out!

And so, sports fans, as our fearless reporters romp off to our next go-cow,

remember to stay tuned for the second and climactic half of the All-Star Laugh

Olympics.

Welcome back to the final half of the All-Star Laugh Olympics.

We'll be televising this portion of our sports extravaganza from wondrous Warsaw

in the pulsating capital of Poland.

where our first event will be the Polish pole vaulting championship contest.

Now, before we get on with the action, let's have a recap of the first half

scores. Yogi Yahui's lead with 50 points, the Scooby Doobies are second

with 40, while the Really Rotten's are on the bottom with 10.

So let's get on with the event.

And first up will be the Yogi's. I'm ready, willing and raring to vault.

Gallopin' Kalumpki's hug.

How does your coil pole work?

Vault, even.

Well, it's real simple, Snag.

Once I plonks the tip down, it uncoils, and I go a-vaultin' up and over.

So go, and show, even.

And the yogis are off and running.

Now he's picking up speed.

Plants his coil and uncoils up. And I mean up, folks. At least 20 feet up. Now

all he has to do is vault over the poles.

Hey, Huckleberry, let go, and over the poles you'll go.

Sure thing, Yogi. Soon as this thing slows down, so's a can.

I know athletes have their ups and downs, but this is ridiculous.

Well, here goes nothing.

He's made the vault, folks, and our electronic high beam records an 11-foot

height for the Yogi. Yay!

Next up will be the Scooby's Scooby-Dum.

What's this?

Wow,

he's a regular symphony of graceful gazelle-like motion.

That's me!

Graceful weather!

This may appear unorthodox, folks, but that is some technique by the

Scoobies. And there goes his vault. It's a terrific 13 feet from the Scoobies,

which tops the Yogi's mark for first place.

So, Rottens, you'll have to top 13 feet to win.

That's no problem.

How can a short person with an even shorter pole expect to out-vault 13

feet? Simple, Mildred. I'll have the whole Rottens team behind me.

I see what you mean.

Now we'll show them what really rotten vaulting is.

This is free-form vaulting. So that means anything goes.

So as ridiculous as this looks, it is not considered cheating.

I wouldn't even consider it pole vaulting. Yes, this is amazing sports

strategy, folks. But from a height of 50 feet, it may be difficult for Creepley

to plant his pole to make the vault.

That's no problem either.

Ah, so we see.

Yes, folks, Creepley has planted his pole. And there he goes back up into the

air for his vault.

Wow, the rocks have made an unbelievable 50-foot vault.

it looks like what was the Rotten's Tower of Strength may crumble.

Suffering salamanders. It's raining Rotten's.

Like they say, the bigger the winners, the harder the fallers.

This is it, folks, finally. And the Rotten's are the undisputed winners.

Well, you silly pile of savages, how does it feel to be on top?

If this is the top, I'll take the bottom.

Son of a... Spoken like true Rotten's. Now let's check the scores.

The third place Yogi's received 10 points to keep them in the lead with 60.

The second place Scooby's get 15 for a total of 55, while the Rotten's 25-point

win vaults them up to 35, which still keeps them...

On the bottom.

Well, folks, the scores are close, so our next event will decide the outcome.

So let's get on with the action here in Midtown Warsaw, where the world is

waiting to see the pulse-pounding pogo stick sprint.

It will be pixie pogoing for the yogis.

For the Scoobies.

And for the Rottens, it's their team captain himself, Muttley.

The Minute Waltz. What is this, a concert or a sporting event?

Both, Miltu.

It's honoring the great Polish composer, Chopin. And giving our athletes a minute

warning. Ethan.

Real cute.

Now I can describe the race route with musical accompaniment. Our beady brain

pogo stickers will start here at the Palace of Science and Culture.

They'll go pogoing along the Vistula River, across Warsaw University, then on

to the finish here at Casimir Palace.

Made it. And just in time too, Mildew. There goes the starting flag.

But Babu's off to a fun stop, ugly sure having his ups and downs on his suit-up

stick. But what's this?

Pixie's so tiny, I didn't notice that he's pogoed off into the lead.

It looks like the Rottens may set an altitude record, but unfortunately,

this, it's a race.

Son of a cousin, what's he laughing about?

Shift her forward, Colt. We've got a race to win.

Well, finally the ruttons are off. And with pogoing like that, they could, uh,

could, mind you, win the race in a few bouts.

What about the Scoobies?

Oh, I guess I just have to make a magical repair.

Yapple-japple.

Oh, oh, a wondrous pogo stick to behold.

Except I'm not holding it. Ooh, wait for me.

Bouncing alongside the Vestula, Pixie still has the lead. Meanwhile, Babu's

Pogo Stick is in third, but he's in fourth place.

Hey, Mutley, your motor-powered Pogo Stick is cheating. And you know cheaters

never win.

Oh, just so.

Now crossing the Warsaw University campus, Dixie has just been passed by

Babu's pogo stick. However, the athlete must be on his stick to win.

Simultaneously, a thoroughly drenched rotten is back in the race.

Personally, I prefer flying carpets, but since this is a pogo stick race, why

not? Yabba dabba!

Ooh, ooh, much better!

The rotten just regained the lead.

But wait, something's happened. Yes, Pixie just got a real lift.

Now Pixie's having no trouble at all with this rotten competition as they

race neck and neck towards Cosmere Palace and the finish line.

Now the Scoobies are flying into the duel for first place. Yes, the Scoobies

have broken the tie, which puts them in first place as our pogo stickers bounce

down the home stretch to the finish.

I knew I could counter my yapple-daffling.

Oops, I better not yapple.

Use any more magic if I want to win.

Besides, who needs it now?

Possibly, Babu.

However... The Rottens and Yogis are still in the race. Babu has pogoed a

brilliant race, folks. But it looks like the Rottens will bounce over him to win.

And it looks like the winner is Babu.

Whoops. Make that pixie for the Yogis. The Scoobies are a close second with the

motor-powered Rottens sputtering in last.

Let's check our final scores.

The winning yogis have maintained their lead to win the day with 85 points.

The Scoobies are second with 70, while the Rottens end up with an unimpressive

45.

And now, here are this week's medalists, folks.

Be sure and watch for us next week for another laugh and action-packed all-star

laugh of the day.