Original subtitles

Heavens to hilarity!

This is it, sports fans!

Participants, even!

Television's greatest array of stars, Laugh Olympics, presents the round-the

-world triple-team competition between the Yogi Yohuis, the Scooby Doobies, and

the Really Rotten Roots.

The players are on the field, in the stadium even, so let's get on with it!

Laugh Olympics!

sports fans welcome to another all-star laugh olympics yes there will be action

and antics aplenty today at our first half here in beautiful bangkok the

capital of siam where you'll thrill to these powerhouse sports you'll be

whisked around the world to cape canaveral florida for a rocket race to

the moon after which today's winners will be awarded the fabulous laugh

olympics gold meanwhile back in bangkok Our first event is about to begin.

The speedy, slam-bang, Siamese sampan race.

Mildew here, where our silly savages are about to put yet another blotch on

sports history.

Heavens to hibiscus, Mildew.

You should look up to our all-stars, the rottens even.

Ha! Say, I look up to a rotten.

It's the day I turn into a frog.

Ah, your day has arrived.

Zippity zappity zappity zog.

Changey mildew into a frog.

Oh, good grace.

I just knew one day these rodents would cause me to croak.

Attention, everybody.

Let's meet our racers.

For the yogis, it's Cindy Bear and Hokey Wolf.

Hong Kong Phooey and Dinobot for the Scooby. And for the really rottens, it's

Orful Octopus and Mrs. Creepley.

All right, athletes, at the bong of the gong, get going!

Now, while they're off and sandpanning, let's check in on their race route.

This is ridiculous.

However, our cellies must sandpan down this twisty, turny river through this

impregnable jungle to reach the finish.

Why couldn't they just race rubber duckies in a tub?

Meanwhile, back at the race, the Rottens have taken the lead. The Yogis are

second with the Scoobies a close third.

Yes, and we'll stay ahead, dog.

Goodness, Hokie, honey.

We don't match against an outboard octopus.

Are you kidding, Cindy?

They won't be able to match our pachyderm power.

Show her, Pamela.

A jumbo jet-powered sandpan?

What will those rubber ranch refugees think of next?

Full speed ahead, dynamite!

Full speed?

Okie dokie, honk, honky.

The yogis are overtaking the rocks, but wait a second, the Scoobies have just

passed them both to take the lead.

Ladies first, darlings.

Oh, sure thing.

F to you, madame.

That was no lady, that was a rotten, you dino dumb bunny.

Oh, shush, Mr.

Fooey. Allowing us ladies to pass is true southern gallantry.

Yeah, thanks a lot, y'all.

Quick, Dog Dodo, up anchor.

Okay, H.K., coming up.

Dynamite, up, up, and away.

Hey, that's one clever accident, Dynamite. Hang around, H.K., you haven't

seen anything yet.

Well, folks, while the Scoobies are hung up, the Yodens have edged out the Robins

for first place.

Well, what do you know?

Karate! Yee-haw!

Boy,

that was great chopping, Hunts, huh?

Gosh, Cindy, with our jet-powered sandpan, we can't lose.

I hear what you mean, Hokie.

Ah, darlings, wait till your jet gets a trunk full of sneezing powder.

Wow, the yogis have blasted

ahead, while the ruttons have also speeded up.

backwards, which puts the Scoobies in second place. And what a maneuver.

Their shortcut has put the Yogi's almost to the finish line.

Swell! But how are we going to pull ahead to win?

Heck, H.K., I've got lots of pull.

It's going to be close, folks. The Yogi's are almost to the finish, but the

Scoobies are really reaching for a victory.

There I go, Sand Panda, with you, Dinah Mutt. Remind me not to go.

Hey, Hong, we reached the finish third.

Sorry, you mixed-up mechanical mutt. To win, you have to reach the finish, not

bring the finish to you.

True, Mildew. So that puts the Yogi's first, the Scooby's second, while the

Rotten's will finish third, eventually.

So now, let's see how the scores add up. The Yogi's win gives them 25 points. The

Scoobies are second with 15, while the Rottens are a cinch for a third-place

10.

Now leaving the tranquil jungles of Siam, it's back to Bangkok for our next

event, one of the superest sports of all, the Siamese three-way soccer match.

It's really simple, folks. Three players will compete to sink the ball in their

goal. First to make a goal will be awarded 25 points, the second 15, and 10

for third.

Or, if a player makes all three goals, he could score a total of 50 points.

Huh, that's silly enough.

How about this for a soccer ball?

Oops!

Suffering soccer socks.

It's a little on the spongy side, if you ask me.

Softy. Be that as it may, Snag, it's time to meet our players.

For the Yogi's, it's Wally Gator. Captain Caveman for the Scoobies. And

for the Rotten's, it's Dinky Dog.

And now Snagglepuss will kick off to the teams.

Heads up, you silly savages, and may the best klutz win.

As you can see, folks, this style of soccer isn't quite as easy as it looks.

Dadgum. Psst.

Too much English on the touch, eh, dinky-po?

Oh, shucks. I can't miss.

He's right, folks. It looks like a clear shot for Wally into the Yogi's unguarded

goal.

Watch it, Yogi's. The Rottens and the Scoobies are attempting to block.

And it's a terrific interception by the Rottens.

Now, Dinky has the ball.

Or vice versa.

Darn little furball.

No, Captain Caveman has the ball. Wow, just look at his amazing soccer

techniques.

This could be that first goal, folks. Unless the Yogi's or Rottens intercept.

Oh, no, he missed. Now the ball is bouncing off, KB, so fast he can't get a

chance to sink it. Oops.

Oh, no,

KB ate the ball.

Come back here, you furry soccer ball stealer, you.

Block him.

Too bad, Ruttons. The first goal of the game goes to the Scoobies for 25 points.

Fantastic,

furry. How do you feel about it?

Bunga.

Bunga.

Here comes the next ball, athletes.

This has got bad name on it.

Oh, shucks.

Terrific. Since Wally touched the ball last and it's headed straight for the

Yogi's goal, they're certain to score.

There it is, folks. A goal for the... the Rottens? I must be seeing things.

Hold the scoring. This must be checked out. I concur.

Agree, Ethan.

This calls for an instant replay.

A cheat check, even.

Aha, it is a cheat by Muttley. So it's no score for the Rottens.

Ahem. Therefore, the second goal goes to the Yogi's for 15 points.

On your toes, athletes. Here comes the last ball.

Fire!

Wow! That ball looks like it was shot out of a cannon. And it's been caught by

the Rottens.

Unbelievable!

It's a goal for the Rotten's for 10 points.

And that's the game, folks.

Now, here are the final halftime scores.

Because the Scoobies won the match, their 25 points gives them 40, and the

Yogi's 15 points ties them for first place. As for the Rotten's, they're

still last with 20.

Brother, after sashaying in Siam with our silly savages, I wish I was

somewhere far, far away, like the moon, for instance.

Ah, your wish is my command.

Oh, no, not again.

Ah, yes.

Beepity-boop and beepity-boom.

Put mildew up on the moon.

Heavens to Murgatroyd. Where'd he go?

Disappeared to even.

I'm not sure, Snag.

But if you're looking for the man in the moon, that's me.

Don't worry, Mildew. We'll all be joining you up there later for our

rocket ship race to the moon. So stay tuned in, fans, for the second half of

the All-Star Laugh Olympics.

We're here at Cape Canaveral, Florida.

Rocket Center of the World, where our first event is about to begin.

A rocket race to the moon.

But first, a recap of the first half scores.

The Yogi's and Scooby's are tied in first place with 40 points each, while

the Rotten's are on the bottom with 20. Now let's go down to the launch site.

Recall, Mildew got fondued to the moon, so he'll handle it from there.

I'll report from here.

Is that a Roger, Mildew?

Roger, Dodger, Snagglepuss. And it's great here, where it's silly savage

free. Not for long, Em.

It's only 250,000 miles from Earth to the moon.

So, after Blastoff, our racers will race through space to the moon's west side.

to the finish line here at Oceanus Crucellarum.

A real out-of-this-world event, even.

That's the countdown signal, folks. So let's meet our rocket racers.

Team Captain Yogi Bear will race for the Yogi.

For the Scoobies, it's a terrific tinker.

And there's the first stage separation, as our racers streak out of the Earth's

atmosphere.

Now topping 50,000 miles per hour, all three racers are neck and neck.

Hold it. The Rottens seem to be dropping back.

Not for long.

Get their brakes, Muttly.

What's this?

The Yogis and Scoobies are using their braking parachutes to slow down, which

is giving the Rottens a big lead.

Oh, no.

I just hope the Rottens have their umbrella. There's a meteor rainstorm

ahead. Good.

Hey, Rottens, watch out for falling rocks.

Thanks for the warning, you jelly stone stoop nago.

Son of a...

Now, halfway to their destination, and using maximum power, our rocketeers will

have to rely on skill and luck, folks.

Or, in the rotten's case, simple skullduggery.

Tinker to Speedy. Any ideas, Speedy?

Lighten up.

Tinker.

Go away, Speedy. That's it.

It's working, folks. How the Tinker has jettisoned almost everything, including

the kitchen sink, the Scoobies have rocketed into first place.

Oh, boy, Boo-Boo.

What'll I do?

Yes, Yogi.

Don't sing the Jellystone blues. You can beat those space canoes. Canoe?

Yeah. So that's what I'll do-do-do, Boo-Boo.

Yeah!

The Yogi's paddle power-assisted rocket has picked up tremendous speed, folks.

And now as they approach the moon, ready to land, it's the Yogi's first and the

Scooby's second. As for the Rotten's, there's just no way they can catch up

now.

Why should we catch up to them when they're going to catch back to us?

Activate the space vacuum.

Now approaching the finish line on Oceana's Procellarium.

Oh, stop with the big words.

All that means is ocean of storms.

Anyway,

it seems certain that the yogis will touch down first.

Hey, nothing can stop us from winning now.

Go away.

I must be spaced out.

Suffering Sagittarians. I would deem this a rotten foul.

Sorry,

Snag. There's nothing in the rules to prevent the Rottens from using a vacuum

cleaner. So, on with the race.

We're at the finish.

It's hard to keep our feet on the ground.

It's not because this nonsense is exciting.

It's because of the moon's silly lack of gravity. Well, here it is, fans. And

mildew. The world's most spectacular race is over, and the winner is... Make

that winners are all three racers. It's a three-way tie.

I agree.

You should have won a permanent disqualification from all sports, you

freaky, sneaky, cheaties, you.

Sorry, Moldew. No rules cover their, uh, unique rocketing techniques.

So, let's check the scores.

The three tying teams earn 25 points each, so the Yogis and Scoobies are

still tied for first at 65 points each, while the Last Place Rotten's have moved

up to 45 to remain last.

Our next event is yet another sports first.

A foot race on the moon. And here are our contestants.

Grape ape for the yogis.

The Scooby's blue falcon.

And it's the grape fondue for the rotten.

And magic rabbit.

Tell the folks about it, reporters.

Galloping Gallywags, this foot race is an obstacle course, too.

True, but our silly sausage's greatest obstacles will be themselves.

And because of the moon's goofy gravity, one step will be like a big broad jump

as they race over pits, crevices, and across Copernicus Crater here to the

finish. Ahem. Thank you, Mildew. Now, sound the starting trumpet, please.

Hmm. So...

A roti-toot! And a tooty-toot, too, we've run!

Uh, they're off and away!

Uh, except it's the wrong way for the Rottens!

Ah, that was merely phase one of my plan!

Ha!

You won't stop at Pandu's phase two!

Uh, when I think of it... Wow! With grapes 100 footsteps, it looks like the

Scoobies will be in real trouble, folks!

Oops, my mistake.

Grape's 40 purple tons have just launched the Scoobies into the lead.

Thanks for the lift, Grape Ape.

Anytime, Grape Ape, Grape Ape.

Oh, too bad, Grape. It looks like you're stuck in second place now.

As for the buttons, well, who knows what Bondu will do.

Bondu will now do phase two.

Observe.

Oh no!

Sometimes my fantastic magic works too well!

Wow! The Rockies have taken off like a rocket to take the lead!

What do you mean, like a rocket?

That Wacko Magico is a rocket!

Sorry, Rotten's, your cheering is premature.

Since this is a foot race, your entry must step, not fly, over the finish line

to win.

However, you tell the folks, Snag. Indeed.

Although Fandu isn't running the race, the judges have awarded the Rotten's a

ten-point bonus for breaking the world's rocket speed record.

Without a rocket, even.

Now, as to the yogis, Grapeape is using all of his gargantuan strength to grape

free.

Grapeape, Grapeape.

Ahead is the finish line, folks. The first place Scoobies might have trouble

crossing over that deep crevice. And even more trouble, because here comes

Grapeape with his giant steps.

As for the Rottens, it looks like they magic themselves out of the race.

As soon as I recall the proper magical words... Sorry, rabbit, wrong words.

No matter the consequences, I must attempt a 300-foot leap.

What bravery, Blue Buddy.

I really have to hand it to you.

What's that, Dino?

An ear lift.

Bubblegum, how humiliating, dog blunder.

Well, fans, as you can see, it's a toss-up between the Yogi's and Scooby's

as to who will win.

Aha! I have it!

Call it a zoola, or I'm at the mind, dropping me down on the finish line.

And here they come, folks.

Wow! The Rottens' fantastic comeback makes them the winners, while the Yogis

and Scoobies tie for second place. The Rottens' 10-point bonus ups them to 55,

plus their 25-point win raises their score to 80, while the second-place

Yogis and Scoobies also end up with 80 each.

Wow! All three teams are tied to become today's final winners.

And so, folks, we have another first in sports history.

All three teams have won the Laff Olympics gold.

Now, as our Laff Olympiacs rocket back to Earth, is there any last word from

our reporters?

Yes, indeed.

Have the butterfly nets ready.

Mildew is flipped.

Slip the cog, even.

It's not that snag. I figured if you can't beat them, join them so.

I've gone bananas like all the other bananas on this show.

Yes, it has been one of those days, fellas.

But please join us next week, fans, for an even banannier action-packed sports

spectacular, All-Star Laugh Olympics.