Original subtitles

(PIANO PLAYING)

FIONA: Your highest honor comes at the greatest price.

Death is not uncommon.

And danger

inescapable.

Attempting the Seven Wonders can get you killed.

But perform them,

and you are the next Supreme.

(LAUGHS)

I don't even need to read your mind to know what you're doing.

You want us to perform the Seven Wonders

so that you can find the next Supreme and then kill her.

(LAUGHS)

Poor, sweet, dumb, paranoid girl.

The awful truth is

-I am tired. -Mmm-hmm.

Where's Marie Laveau?

That's not our business.

It's mine.

The only other black witch in this place goes missing,

I want to know what happened.

She's probably off in some unholy nether realm.

Cavorting with that half-baked Beetlejuice.

(LAUGHS)

Papa Legaboo-boo, whatever the hell his name is.

Legba!

He's a deity. Show some respect.

(GASPING FOR AIR)

Respect is something

that is definitely lacking around here. I will grant you that.

You will show me respect!

Your Supreme

until the moment

I am replaced.

(GASPING)

So rest up,

little girl.

Take your vitamin B-12s.

(LAUGHS)

Your trials begin Saturday morning.

You will perform the Seven Wonders.

Or,

you will die trying.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Madison?

I need your help.

Jesus, Cordelia. You look like shit.

I can't believe you did that to yourself.

I've been in Misty's room trying to see something.

I've held her boots, hair from her brush.

Nothing.

I hate to be the Debbie Downer, but maybe she's gone.

Or maybe my gift of the sight hasn't come back.

Whoa! That was cool!

I did transmutation.

I didn't even have to think about it. It just happened.

I wouldn't read too much into it, Madison.

You can manifest multiple powers without being the Supreme.

Our powers always spike

-in times of crisis. -(CANE TAPPING ON GROUND)

This is one of those times.

Madison, I need to touch you.

Tell the truth, Cordie. Are you into girls now?

The last time I touched you, I saw things.

What are you afraid I might see?

Nothing stays a secret for very long in this house, Madison.

It will come to light

whether you want it to or not.

I don't have any secrets.

Then walk over here.

Knock yourself out.

Boom, boom.

Aw.

(GASPS)

MARIE: That damn

buttermilk biscuit!

Thinks she can take me down.

Hell no!

I'm the queen. I will rise again!

Mark my words.

My people gonna come for you.

Rip you apart.

Marie?

(DISTORTED WHISPERING, SCREAMING)

(SIGHS)

Spiritu duce, in me est.

Deduc me in tenebris vita.

Ad extremum ut

salutaret 'nferi.

(GASPS)

Descensum.

(GROANS)

What you doing, girl?

Give me the box of chicken.

Today, please.

Listen, watch the counter for me. I'm going on break, okay?

(DISTANTLY) What am I doing here?

Been asking myself the same thing for 20 years.

Just watch the counter.

What the hell?

You're Papa Legba.

You live in a chicken shack?

No, darling.

It's not the hell.

It's your hell.

This was the worst time of your life.

Waiting on people who treated you

like the piece of trash you thought you were.

No power.

No respect.

And no future that you could see.

Just grease in your hair and the smell of lard in your nose.

Look,

I came to talk to you about Marie Laveau.

I was told you hang out together.

She ain't here. There's this thing about being immortal.

Your hell's on Earth.

Hey, dude! Just order and get out of line!

I've been waiting forever for my chicken!

And you can wait some more!

Don't make me put you in the fryer.

(DISTORTED) Now, go to the back of the line!

See?

Everybody got to pay in the end.

He gets to smell the delicious chicken and never get a bite.

Took some skills to come down here before your time.

Most people be afraid they couldn't get back.

Wait! I'm not done with you!

It's almost sun up.

Unless you want to stay here forever,

you better hurry and get back.

What are you talking about? I've been here five minutes.

Time

moves differently in Hell.

(DEEP LAUGHTER)

WOMAN: I want the jumbo box with butter corn.

No wings, no thighs.

Give me only breasts and legs.

Yo! You listening to me?

I'm talking to you, bitch!

(SNIFFS)

(SIGHS)

You made it back.

I'm impressed.

Now that I've proven my power,

you're gonna give me some answers.

(SCREAMING)

You remember how you told me you were gonna cut me up in little pieces

-and plant me all over the place? -(YELLS)

-I thought that was a honey of an idea. -(SCREAMS)

There's got to be a way to kill her.

So long as the voodoo queen live, so do Madame LaLaurie.

More marshmallows.

Then you need to take Marie Laveau out of the equation for me.

Can't do that.

Me and Marie Laveau, we got a deal.

I thought your deal was that every year

she needs to perform a service for you.

So it is.

Well, she's not gonna be doing anything while she's chopped into 50 pieces

and those pieces are scattered all over the city.

Technically,

you can say she's already in breach, right?

You are one crafty witch.

DELPHINE: The elegant and universally admired Madame Delphine LaLaurie

was not only a brilliant hostess

for high society soirees.

But she was also renowned for her remarkable equestrian abilities

and her tireless charitable works.

Says here she was a serial killer.

That's a misprint.

When do we get to see the attic torture chamber?

That part of the house is closed off for renovations.

-(CLICKS TONGUE) -Oh, great.

And there is no torture chamber.

The attic was used for storage.

And occasionally for the firm, but humane correction

of Madame LaLaurie's domestics.

These wild tales of barbarity you've heard

are nothing more than lies invented by her many enemies.

Madame Delphine LaLaurie was a woman ahead of her time.

A visionary.

Misunderstood.

And hated for it.

This way, please.

-Well, that sucked. -Total rip-off.

-Thank you for coming. -(DOOR CREAKING)

(SIGHS)

Psst!

Queenie.

How did you find me?

Wasn't hard.

You're a cliche, Delphine.

A dog returns to its vomit.

I see you finally got that makeover.

Guess you figured you could makeover a little history, too.

On the contrary.

I'm here to set the record straight.

(SCOFFS)

This historical site was nothing but a house of lies before I came back.

This very house, the center of New Orleans high society,

was also a place of abject horror.

Madame Delphine LaLaurie earned her place in history

alongside such monsters as Jack the Ripper,

Ed Gein and Jeffrey Dahmer.

She even looks like a monster.

The inhuman LaLaurie

is said to have murdered as many as 150 slaves right here.

Many times while there were extravagant parties going on just below,

the sounds of music and revelry drowning out the cries of torment.

Horseshit.

You don't believe it?

Nobody's gonna waste their time with some uppity Negro

and miss a fabulous party.

It beggars all belief.

(DOOR OPENS)

GUIDE: Thank you for coming.

DELPHINE: Excuse me?

Yes?

I seem to have mislaid my pocketbook.

I think I set it down upstairs.

I don't see anything. Are you certain?

By the way,

it wasn't any 150 slaves that died up here.

I can tell you that.

I'm sorry?

It was 62.

I kept a ledger.

I, I don't understand.

The information you've been feeding these people?

(CLICKS TONGUE)

It's inaccurate.

I want my money back.

Do not touch the display items!

Ma'am, I am gonna have to ask you to leave now.

My own house?

(BODY THUDS)

(WOMAN MOANS QUIETLY)

(SIGHS)

You have to let this woman go.

What you gonna do?

Offer you a second chance.

You don't mean it.

(SIGHS) You will never be able to pay for your crimes.

But I'm willing to walk you into the local office of the Urban League.

You can offer your services as a volunteer.

You can help the descendants of the people you brutalized.

(LAUGHS)

Are you out of your simple mind?

It's your only chance for redemption.

Redemption? (LAUGHS)

I know how redemption works in this century.

I seen it all on the magic box.

REPORTER: Paula Deen was asked, "Have you ever used the 'N' word yourself?"

"Yes, of course," she stated. "But it's been a very long time."

Agree to be publicly humiliated, all is forgiven.

Last Friday night I tweeted a photograph of myself

that I intended as part of a joke to a woman in Seattle.

DELPHINE: People have gotten soft, weak, lily-livered.

All anybody has to do nowadays is shed some tears,

say some words.

It's called repentance.

Oh, repentance my ass.

You think a man jack among them was well and truly sorry?

Not a one.

Sorry they got caught is all.

Y'all nothing but a pack of sniveling hypocrites, as far as I can see.

Not me.

I won't profess to be sorry, 'cause I'm not.

I don't believe that.

I was getting to you before. I know it.

You made me weep.

But not as you would have it for my supposed sins.

I wept for the state of this world.

A world of lies.

A world that makes promises it cannot keep.

To tell a colored man

that he can be equal to a white man?

There's the real cruelty.

-I'm not going anywhere. -Actually you are.

Ow!

Straight to hell.

It's impossible!

I'm immortal.

Wrong.

I don't want to die.

Tough shit. Who does?

(GRUNTING)

I want my portrait hung just there.

Yes, I knew you'd occupy a prominent place on the wall.

And I didn't want some garish paint-by-numbers by a local.

That's why I flew Claude in from London.

He's done everyone.

Margaret Thatcher.

Sting.

What are you doing back there?

You have to balance the frame.

The negative space makes you look more drawn.

Claude trusts my taste.

Well, I don't.

(SNIFFLES)

I'm sorry.

-Do you need a break? -No.

No, I'll be fine. Just a minute.

Oh, God.

This is the face they'll be stuck with.

I probably have two weeks left on Earth.

So what the hell am I doing here?

(SIGHS)

(DOOR OPENS)

CORDELIA: Goddamn it, Mother.

What's this I hear about Queenie performing the Seven Wonders on Saturday?

Cordelia, please.

Maybe we could

be kind to one another for a change, huh?

Oh. (LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)

My God, look at you.

My beautiful little girl.

(LAUGHS) Oh.

Did you really think

self-mutilation would restore your power?

Right up until I tried it.

You cannot lose your power.

You never will.

It's inside of you.

And it is not something I gave to you.

As much as I'd like to, I cannot take credit for that.

It's all you.

You are just full of surprises, Fiona Goode, you know that?

(CHUCKLES)

Well, I have one more.

It's from the vault.

What is it?

It was my mother's.

Her most precious heirloom.

(LAUGHS)

Grandmother's necklace?

Do you remember?

Yes. Of course I do.

When I was a little girl,

I used to gaze up at her wearing this necklace.

Thinking to myself I will never grow to be

so transcendent.

Oh, I know the feeling well.

Here, take it.

You're saying good-bye?

-Yes, I am. -Hmm.

And I mean it this time.

We both knew it was coming.

Here.

Lift your hair. I want to put it on you.

(DISTANT SCREAMS)

(SLOW FOOTFALLS)

(ECHOING SCREAMS)

(SLOW FOOTFALLS)

(LIQUID DRIPPING)

(FOOTFALLS)

What's the matter?

Nothing.

I'm fine.

I just…

Wasn't there a ring

that Grandmother used to wear with this?

I feel so selfish asking.

(CHUCKLES)

Well, if not now, when, huh?

Right.

(DOOR CREAKS)

AXEMAN: Just because you witches, uh, can open the locks

with your hocus-pocus,

it doesn't make it polite.

A man shouldn't be disturbed when he's playing with his instrument.

You don't have your mother's features.

Oh, you know who I am?

Oh, yes, of course. We spent quite an evening together.

It's not safe to love my mother, you know.

I speak from experience.

She can't love anyone but herself.

I'm sure the transcendence of my relationship

with your mother is hard for you to understand.

But I'm happy that she told you about us.

She didn't tell me anything.

I saw everything.

(WHISPERS) Everything.

And she's gonna kill all of us

and leave you behind, too.

Unzip me.

AXEMAN: Sitting on a porch drinking gin rickeys.

CORDELIA: She's not going to run away with you.

Whatever fantasy you have about who she is

and what you are to her, it's all bullshit.

She used you.

All she does is use people.

It's nothing.

It's just a piece of paper. It's as, as light as air.

That flight leaves in two days.

You think she might have let you know that you were leaving town that soon.

I don't suspect you have a passport ready.

She's going to regain her power,

and when she does, she's not going to waste her time

on some halfway decent musician in a $12 suit.

You feel that?

That empty,

heartbroken feeling?

That's what it feels like to get close to Fiona.

CORDELIA: Come on, Misty, give me a hint.

(MISTY SINGING SOFTLY) And I saw my reflection

(INHALES DEEPLY)

In the snow-covered hills

Till the landslide brought me down

I see you. I see you. Where are you?

Take my love, take it down

(ECHOES) I climbed a mountain and I turned around

(PANTING)

QUEENIE: How the hell are we gonna get her out of there?

With a jackhammer, if we have to.

I'm gonna go find a maintenance man.

No, no, just us.

You mean, just me, and I don't have a jackhammer.

Stop being so literal and remember who you are.

When the rest of the world sees a wall,

we see a window.

That's it.

Keep going.

(BRICKS CRACKING)

Is she alive?

It's hard to tell.

Misty!

-She's not breathing. -Oh, God.

Okay, okay.

Okay.

Vitalum vitalis.

(BLOWS AIR)

(GASPING INHALE)

(COUGHS)

(GASPING INHALE)

That's deadly nightshade you're about to ingest through your nostrils.

I wouldn't sniff around unless you're looking for a bout of delirium.

Sounds like every Saturday night since I was 15.

(SIGHS) Where is everybody?

Our beloved Cordelia has regained her second sight.

She's off with Queenie to try and rescue Misty Day.

Apparently, the poor girl has been entombed.

Who would have been cruel enough to commit such an atrocity?

I have no idea.

I just hope they get to her in time.

I heard people die after three days without water.

Please tell me this is a hallucination driven by my bouquet of Atropa belladonna.

Zoe, you can't possibly be back at the Robichaux Academy.

I won't allow it.

You were supposed to spend your days in romantic splendor with your true love.

You're just like Halston

when he sold his brand to J.C. Penney.

You've forsaken your destiny.

No, Myrtle, I've embraced it.

We made it to Florida.

What better than the Sunshine State to cast the darkness out of our lives?

You dripped.

(CHUCKLES) You bit it off.

-(BOTH LAUGH) -Hey, you're in my spot!

Get out of here! I want to sleep!

We're leaving.

You, don't talk to me!

Don't talk to me!

-Kyle, no! -(NECK CRACKS)

MADISON: What a surprise.

Your pit bull mauled somebody.

Is that why you came back, because you can't handle him?

No.

I came back because there's no escaping what I am.

Vitalum vitalis.

(MAN COUGHS)

I came back

because I'm clearly the next Supreme.

(MADISON SCOFFS, DOOR SLAMS)

You bitch.

You thought I was some dumb swamp rat you could leave behind to die?

(LAUGHS) Um, yes.

Oh!

Girls, stop these vulgar fisticuffs at once.

It's beneath us.

-MYRTLE: Cordelia? -I'm good.

I don't want to waste my magic on you. I can do you with my hands.

(MADISON SCREAMS)

You hit like a girl!

(GRUNTING, YELLING)

(GROANS)

This is awesome!

No, it's not. Stop!

Come on. Get up, Hollywood.

-(GRUNTS) -(YELLS)

(GRUNTING)

(SHRIEKS)

Ow!

-(BOTH SCREAM) -Enough!

You! You must pay for what you've done!

Wow, did you walk into the wrong house.

(YELLS)

Who the hell is this guy?

CORDELIA: I know that voice.

It's the Axeman.

I thought you banished his soul to the appropriate nether realms?

CORDELIA: No, he's on the mortal coil.

I'll kill all of you!

Is that blood?

Not his.

Then whose?

How could you do this to me?

This blood is my mother's.

(DOOR CLOSES IN DISTANCE, FOOTFALLS)

(DOOR CREAKS OPEN)

(CHUCKLES) It's quiet.

I don't remember the last time

I was here when there wasn't music playing.

You pack your wader boots?

What?

'Cause I want to take you fishing.

(CHUCKLES) Fishing.

Yeah. Yeah, fishing.

For catfish.

-Catfish. -Mmm-hmm.

Yeah.

When you fry them,

the batter, it has to be crunchy, never greasy.

I don't like catfish.

I loathe all bottom-feeders.

Well, then I'll go boar-hunting.

While you're sitting on a porch drinking gin rickeys, huh?

(GIGGLES) Gin rickeys.

Unzip me.

Your daughter, she paid me a visit.

Oh.

Please tell me she's in the bathtub.

(SHORT LAUGH)

She's pretty, but she doesn't have your cheekbones.

She came, I guess, to… to rile me up.

I imagine she wanted me to do her dirty work for her.

What is the world coming to, huh,

when the Supreme's daughter…

(LAUGHS)

…has to outsource her own killings?

(SIGHS)

We had a deal.

It wasn't on paper,

it wasn't stamped by a notary, but we had a deal!

(SLAMS GLASS DOWN ON COUNTER)

And what, Cordelia has convinced you otherwise?

Why do they insist on always putting me in seat 1A?

Well, I guess the cat is out of the bag, huh?

I mean, I was gonna tell you.

(SIGHS)

You have been the most delightful distraction.

A life preserver.

But I'm gonna be on dry land soon.

Can't you at least pretend?

Just, just humor me for a while?

I guess I loved you.

Huh.

Although I really don't know anything about love,

if I'm gonna be honest.

But you were the sweetest of lovers.

(CHUCKLES) The best I ever had.

And I'll miss that.

(GRUNTING SOFTLY)

Let's be realistic.

When the new Supreme is dead,

I'll have 30 years of vitality until another one comes along.

And the doors of every palace are gonna open for me.

I mean, hell,

I know you've got all this to offer,

but come on, you and I both knew that this would never…

Ah!

(GRUNTING) Son of a…

Let go of me!

-I love you! -Oh, Jesus.

I know you love me!

I don't! Christ, I was sick!

I just needed to feel something.

That was all!

Ah. Shit.

Ah.

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

I made you die those little deaths

for the first time in your sorry life.

I made you sing

when you had no tunes left in you.

Get off of me!

Get off of me, get off of me, you son of a bitch!

No!

Christ.

No tears, old boy.

Huh?

What you're doing is a crime against humanity.

A betrayal

of the true heart of love.

Well, I've never been one for love,

true or otherwise.

(PANTING)

I live in a floating world, you know?

Always two steps ahead of heartbreak.

(LAUGHS)

When I was eight years old,

my mother brought me a little calico cat.

(GASPS)

(GRUNTING)

MADISON: Holy shit.

So she's really gone.

Does anyone feel any different?

-Where's the body? -In the swamps.

He fed her to the alligators.

-Jesus. -MISTY: Well, that's it, then.

Even I can't bring somebody back once they're gator shit.

Okay.

So who wants to do this?

Somebody's got to kill this creep.

MYRTLE: Oh, bloody-blood-blood all day in this place.

Is that really necessary?

Yeah. He's a psycho mass murderer.

Is there anyone here of whom that could not be said?

This poor troubled soul has saved this coven by doing away with Fiona.

And as Cervantes once said,

"Where there is music, there can be no evil."

Cervantes never meant this asshole.

(GRUNTING)

I'm coven guard dog. I'll kill him.

No. I'll do it.

(AXEMAN GRUNTING)

We really don't need a man to protect us.

Nobody messes with our coven!

DELPHINE: Please, no! (SCREAMS)

Let me go!

No!

(SOBBING) Wait, please.

No.

(DELPHINE SCREAMS)

God, why this?

BORQUITA: Mother?

Borquita, my sweet child.

I know I mistreated you in the past.

But there's no greater pain

than being this close

and not, not being able to reach you.

And to comfort you.

Oh, I'm consumed with regret.

BORQUITA: Why are they doing this to us?

Because we can.

Behold the kingdom of the family LaLaurie!

BORQUITA: Please.

I'm so thirsty.

Please, so thirsty.

DELPHINE: Give her something to drink,

you animal!

(GROANS)

(SOBBING)

Mmm.

(BORQUITA CHOKES)

MARIE: Are you hungry, too?

I'll slice off one of your mama's fingers

-and feed it to you! -(GASPS)

DELPHINE: You monster.

Yes, I have sinned.

I gave no quarter.

But torturing a mama's babies in front of her?

Even when I killed that little high yellow bastard,

I spared his mammy from seein' it.

Oh, please, no. Have mercy on my soul!

This ain't for you!

But I will let you choose

whether I slide it down her throat or up her backside.

No, please! Mother!

-(SCREAMS) No! -DELPHINE: Oh, no!

(BORQUITA AND DELPHINE SCREAMING)

DELPHINE: Oh, God, please, not my daughter, please!

How did I get here?

No, no, no, no. I don't want to do that.

That girl ain't never done nothing to me.

I don't want to do this!

You will do as you are tasked.

It is your soul's purpose,

because I own it.

Who is this man?

What is this place?

Congratulations, Madame Delphine LaLaurie.

You have been granted your sweet release

from the world of the mortal.

And as punishment for your crimes of murder, torture,

passion, fashion and being an all-around no-good miserable bitch,

you will spend all of eternity here

in my home.

It is my home.

No, it's mine.

Welcome to Hell.

MARIE: No, that can't be true.

I can't die!

We have a contract!

One you can no longer fulfill.

MARIE: But I was good to people.

I protected so many.

PAPA: How many little babies did you bring to me every year?

No one gets away with sin.

(PAPA CHUCKLES)

Eventually,

everybody pays.

(MAN SCREAMS DISTANTLY)

Everybody suffers.

Now get back to work.

(LAUGHING)

BORQUITA: No! Please! Mother! No!

(SCREAMS)

-(PAPA LAUGHING) -(BORQUITA SCREAMING)

(SCREAMS)

CORDELIA: How does she look?

MYRTLE: Magnificent.

I wish you could see it.

I can.

I can see it through you.

She was so beautiful.

ZOE: She was a great Supreme.

QUEENIE: A lot to live up to.

(SIGHS) One of the best.

She was a force to be reckoned with,

but she was a horrible Supreme.

She shirked all of her responsibility,

including the most important.

Identifying her successor.

So it will be up to us to find our new leader.

And the only way is through the test of Seven Wonders.

And since it could be any one of you,

you will all be tested.

The Seven Wonders.

Sunday at dawn it begins.

Everyone participates.

And by next week, we will have a new Supreme.