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1
00:00:10,488 --> 00:00:13,143
Guys, stop what you're doing.
I have something to tell you.
2
00:00:13,187 --> 00:00:15,493
Is it bad news? Is
it Dad's pacemaker?
3
00:00:15,537 --> 00:00:17,278
Should I sit down or stand up?
4
00:00:17,321 --> 00:00:20,759
Just to be safe,
I'm gonnasplit the difference and lean.
5
00:00:22,326 --> 00:00:24,850
I just heard on the radio
that in England,
6
00:00:24,894 --> 00:00:28,202
they call boloney "polony."
7
00:00:29,551 --> 00:00:32,423
I don't like it. It's arrogant.
8
00:00:32,467 --> 00:00:34,947
I got to go to the bank.
9
00:00:34,991 --> 00:00:37,863
Or as they call it in England,
the "pank."
10
00:00:37,907 --> 00:00:38,971
We're not doing that, Lowell.
11
00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:40,997
Copy that.
12
00:00:43,347 --> 00:00:44,914
[phone chimes]
13
00:00:47,003 --> 00:00:48,744
Lowell just got a text.
14
00:00:48,787 --> 00:00:49,982
Hey, come on. That's personal.
15
00:00:50,006 --> 00:00:51,181
Don't read it.
16
00:00:51,225 --> 00:00:52,313
It's from his ex-wife.
17
00:00:52,356 --> 00:00:53,749
Read it.
18
00:00:53,792 --> 00:00:55,031
[high-pitched]:
"Hey, Lowell..."
19
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:56,230
Normal voice.
20
00:00:56,273 --> 00:00:58,754
"Hey, Lowell,
can we gettogether for a drink?
21
00:00:58,797 --> 00:01:01,670
It's not about the kids, it's about us."
22
00:01:01,713 --> 00:01:04,194
"Us"? They don't have
an us anymore.
23
00:01:04,238 --> 00:01:05,500
What do you think she wants?
24
00:01:05,543 --> 00:01:07,371
Sex. Men and women
only drink together
25
00:01:07,415 --> 00:01:09,373
to loosen up for boom-boom time.
26
00:01:09,417 --> 00:01:11,158
This is not good.
27
00:01:11,201 --> 00:01:13,334
Lowell was devastated
after she cheated on him.
28
00:01:13,377 --> 00:01:14,876
Look, if he thinks he has
another chance with her,
29
00:01:14,900 --> 00:01:16,250
he'll jump at it.
30
00:01:16,293 --> 00:01:18,054
Then she'll break his heart
and we'll be knee-deep
31
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,557
in man tears again.
32
00:01:19,601 --> 00:01:21,907
Remember how loud he cries?
33
00:01:21,951 --> 00:01:23,692
It was the worst sound
I've ever heard.
34
00:01:23,735 --> 00:01:25,476
And I saw a documentary
on a marching band
35
00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:27,130
that got sucked up by a twister.
36
00:01:28,392 --> 00:01:29,915
You know, all the horns.
37
00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:31,395
All right.
38
00:01:31,439 --> 00:01:33,441
O-Okay, let's think
about this. Um...
39
00:01:33,484 --> 00:01:36,008
Oh. What if we stop
it before it happens?
40
00:01:36,052 --> 00:01:38,030
We'll delete Jen's text,
Lowell won't text her back,
41
00:01:38,054 --> 00:01:39,403
the whole thing goes away.
42
00:01:39,447 --> 00:01:41,231
Let's do it.Okay.
43
00:01:41,275 --> 00:01:44,365
Uh... I don't know how to do it.
44
00:01:44,408 --> 00:01:46,430
Right there, that's delete.
Yeah, that deletes the whole chain.
45
00:01:46,454 --> 00:01:48,282
How do you delete just one text?
46
00:01:48,325 --> 00:01:50,240
I got it. You're highlighting it.
47
00:01:50,284 --> 00:01:51,807
That's copy and paste.
48
00:01:51,850 --> 00:01:53,287
You just took a picture of us.
49
00:01:53,330 --> 00:01:55,506
[car door closes]
50
00:01:56,855 --> 00:01:58,683
Oh, no, he's back.
He can't see this text.
51
00:01:58,727 --> 00:02:00,922
What do we do? Uh... Just take it.
Take the whole damn phone.
52
00:02:00,946 --> 00:02:02,513
I don't want it.
53
00:02:02,557 --> 00:02:04,124
Just stash it somewhere.
54
00:02:05,473 --> 00:02:07,562
Not there.
55
00:02:07,605 --> 00:02:09,205
It's all right, we're family. Come on...
56
00:02:11,392 --> 00:02:12,567
I forgot my phone.
57
00:02:12,610 --> 00:02:14,743
Ah.
Right on.
58
00:02:14,786 --> 00:02:16,527
I pulledonto Old Town Road
59
00:02:16,571 --> 00:02:19,617
and asked Siri to play
"Old Town Road," like I do.
60
00:02:19,661 --> 00:02:22,185
But when she didn't,
I thought she was ignoring me,
61
00:02:22,229 --> 00:02:24,405
so I asked louder and louder
until I realized
62
00:02:24,448 --> 00:02:27,538
I didn't have my phone
and I was shouting at myself.
63
00:02:27,582 --> 00:02:29,627
If I had a nickel.
64
00:02:29,671 --> 00:02:31,194
Right?[laughter]
65
00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:35,416
[sighs]Huh.
66
00:02:35,459 --> 00:02:37,766
It's not here.
Hmm.
67
00:02:37,809 --> 00:02:39,047
Well, I hope you're
not suggesting
68
00:02:39,071 --> 00:02:40,595
that it's in Adam's pants.
69
00:02:43,554 --> 00:02:45,556
♪
70
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,088
[door opens]
71
00:02:56,132 --> 00:02:58,569
Hey. Sorry I'm late for dinner.
72
00:02:58,613 --> 00:03:02,356
Oh, dinner.
That's why I came in here.
73
00:03:04,619 --> 00:03:07,230
I stopped by Dad's after work
to check on him.
74
00:03:07,274 --> 00:03:09,928
Oh, yeah? How is he adjustingto
life with the new pacemaker?
75
00:03:09,972 --> 00:03:11,626
Well, he seemed fine,
but I could tell
76
00:03:11,669 --> 00:03:13,280
they were hurrying me out.
77
00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:16,631
Especially when Dad said,
"Hurry and get out."
78
00:03:16,674 --> 00:03:19,242
Well, y-you thinkhe's not feeling well
79
00:03:19,286 --> 00:03:20,504
and he's trying to hide it?
80
00:03:20,548 --> 00:03:21,897
Something's going on.
81
00:03:21,940 --> 00:03:23,725
I need to get
to the bottom of it.
82
00:03:23,768 --> 00:03:25,770
When's dinner?
83
00:03:25,814 --> 00:03:28,425
I have been down here
working on it for hours.
84
00:03:28,469 --> 00:03:30,427
I am only one person.
85
00:03:30,471 --> 00:03:32,255
Uh, hey,
86
00:03:32,299 --> 00:03:34,257
uh, Katie, can you go
check on Grandpa?
87
00:03:34,301 --> 00:03:37,260
Snoop around, see how he's
doingand report back to me?
88
00:03:37,304 --> 00:03:38,914
I don't like the idea of spying.
Well...
89
00:03:39,958 --> 00:03:42,396
I'll give you $20.
90
00:03:42,439 --> 00:03:46,226
Okay. I'll do
anything for money.
91
00:03:46,269 --> 00:03:49,229
Well, that's comforting
to a father.
92
00:03:49,272 --> 00:03:51,796
I'll go after school tomorrow.
93
00:03:54,277 --> 00:03:55,757
ANDI: Uh...
94
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,541
W-Why do you have
an extra cell phone?
95
00:03:57,585 --> 00:03:59,413
[gasps]
Oh.
96
00:03:59,456 --> 00:04:03,286
Is it a burner
for your secret second family?
97
00:04:03,330 --> 00:04:06,246
Yeah. Is that gonna
be a problem?
98
00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:10,250
No, but...
99
00:04:10,293 --> 00:04:12,426
Maybe you could fill up
your other wife's DVR
100
00:04:12,469 --> 00:04:14,297
with Finding Bigfoot.
101
00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:16,038
[chuckles]
102
00:04:16,081 --> 00:04:17,692
This is Lowell's phone.
103
00:04:17,735 --> 00:04:19,781
Jen texted him that she wanted
to meet for a drink.
104
00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:21,411
Well, I didn't want him
to see it and be tempted
105
00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:23,045
to get back together with her.
106
00:04:23,088 --> 00:04:24,264
So you stole his phone?
107
00:04:24,307 --> 00:04:26,266
Well, we tried to delete
just the one text,
108
00:04:26,309 --> 00:04:29,269
but I think you can only do
thatfrom Apple headquarters.
109
00:04:30,879 --> 00:04:33,795
Yeah. Look,
you got to giveLowell his phone back.
110
00:04:33,838 --> 00:04:35,840
All right?
If you're concernedfor your friend,
111
00:04:35,884 --> 00:04:38,582
just tell him you're
worriedbecause you care about him.
112
00:04:38,626 --> 00:04:40,323
That's not how we do it.
113
00:04:42,107 --> 00:04:43,892
I steal his phone.
That's how we do it.
114
00:04:43,935 --> 00:04:47,896
Look, I agree with you,
Jen is terrible for him.
115
00:04:47,939 --> 00:04:49,680
Okay? But Lowell's a grown man.
116
00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:51,943
You need to let him
make his own choices.
117
00:04:52,988 --> 00:04:55,512
I'm a grown man.
118
00:04:55,556 --> 00:04:58,428
You don't let me
make my own choices.
119
00:04:58,472 --> 00:05:00,517
[chuckles]: Honey,
give Lowell his phone back.
120
00:05:02,171 --> 00:05:03,651
You know,
I don't have these problems
121
00:05:03,694 --> 00:05:06,175
with my secret second family.
122
00:05:06,218 --> 00:05:08,569
I'm the boss over there.
123
00:05:11,398 --> 00:05:13,617
When's Lowell getting here?
124
00:05:13,661 --> 00:05:17,012
I'm pulling up his
locationon Find My Friends.
125
00:05:17,055 --> 00:05:18,318
He's in the living room!
126
00:05:20,755 --> 00:05:22,365
Oh, that's right. We have his phone.
127
00:05:22,409 --> 00:05:25,412
I still think it's a
mistaketo give this back.
128
00:05:25,455 --> 00:05:27,346
I know how to get rid of it.
Give it to one of the kids
129
00:05:27,370 --> 00:05:29,610
and tell them, "Don't lose
it." We'll never see it again.
130
00:05:31,418 --> 00:05:34,246
Why didn't you guys
just delete the text?
131
00:05:34,290 --> 00:05:37,206
It can't be done.
We don't work for NASA, Marcy.
132
00:05:37,249 --> 00:05:39,426
It's two steps: edit, delete.
133
00:05:39,469 --> 00:05:43,038
I know because I deleted all
of Don's texts about polony.
134
00:05:44,822 --> 00:05:47,825
It's what the British
people call boloney.
135
00:05:47,869 --> 00:05:51,351
I don't like it. It's arrogant.
136
00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:54,571
You and I are
so made for each other.
137
00:05:54,615 --> 00:05:56,051
[door opens]
138
00:05:56,094 --> 00:05:57,835
Hey, what's up? Hey, Lowell.
139
00:05:57,879 --> 00:06:00,185
Uh, have a seat. I can't stay long.
140
00:06:00,229 --> 00:06:03,406
I'm meeting a guy who
respondedto my lost phone flyer.
141
00:06:03,450 --> 00:06:05,471
He said to meet him in an
alleyand to wear a tank top
142
00:06:05,495 --> 00:06:07,802
and gym shorts
so he knows it's me.
143
00:06:09,499 --> 00:06:13,503
Uh-huh. In the future, maybe
run that stuff by us, okay?
144
00:06:13,547 --> 00:06:15,679
Right. Uh, so, Lowell, um,
145
00:06:15,723 --> 00:06:18,552
how are you feeling about
your ex-wife these days?
146
00:06:18,595 --> 00:06:20,162
I'm finally in a good place.
147
00:06:20,205 --> 00:06:22,512
I haven't hackedinto her e-mail in months.
148
00:06:23,992 --> 00:06:25,950
You broke into her e-mail?
149
00:06:25,994 --> 00:06:29,432
Yeah, I have Jen's password,
andevery night after the divorce,
150
00:06:29,476 --> 00:06:34,394
I would curl up in her old
sweatshirt and read her inbox.
151
00:06:34,437 --> 00:06:38,180
That sounded sexy,
but I know it's sad.
152
00:06:38,223 --> 00:06:40,574
But you're over her now?
153
00:06:40,617 --> 00:06:42,793
Totally and completely.
154
00:06:42,837 --> 00:06:45,927
Okay, well, then,
I guessyou can have your phone back.
155
00:06:46,493 --> 00:06:47,885
Don took it.
156
00:06:47,929 --> 00:06:49,104
Yeah.
157
00:06:49,147 --> 00:06:50,932
Because-because Jen texted you,
158
00:06:50,975 --> 00:06:52,716
and we didn't want you
to overreact.
159
00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:54,128
Oh, that's no big deal. We text each other
160
00:06:54,152 --> 00:06:58,113
all the time about the kids... A drink?!
161
00:06:58,156 --> 00:06:59,419
She wants to get a drink.
162
00:06:59,462 --> 00:07:01,725
Okay, hold on, hold on,
don't get too excited.
163
00:07:01,769 --> 00:07:04,119
We're getting back together.
Jump up and down with me. Oh.
164
00:07:04,162 --> 00:07:07,209
Yeah, no... Uh, Lowell,
I-I'm wearing the wrong bra.
165
00:07:07,252 --> 00:07:10,212
Yeah. No jumping,
no... I thoughtyou said you were over her.
166
00:07:10,255 --> 00:07:11,822
That was whenshe didn't want me back.
167
00:07:11,866 --> 00:07:13,084
Now she wants me back.
168
00:07:13,128 --> 00:07:15,522
I'm back!
169
00:07:15,565 --> 00:07:17,088
I'm answering her.
170
00:07:17,132 --> 00:07:19,090
"Where and when?" ANDI:
Okay...
171
00:07:19,134 --> 00:07:20,938
[sighs] Lowell, just because
Jen wants a one-nighter
172
00:07:20,962 --> 00:07:22,113
doesn't mean that she
wants to get back together.
173
00:07:22,137 --> 00:07:23,747
That's right, Andi. Tell him.
174
00:07:23,791 --> 00:07:25,749
Yeah, well, she could
just be using you.
175
00:07:25,793 --> 00:07:29,144
I mean, ladies like
cheap sex, too.
176
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:32,582
Well, don't lie to him.
177
00:07:32,626 --> 00:07:34,192
[phone chimes]
178
00:07:34,236 --> 00:07:35,629
[gasps]
She answered.
179
00:07:35,672 --> 00:07:37,979
"I'm staying at the Bainbridge
Hotel this weekend.
180
00:07:38,022 --> 00:07:39,763
Let's get a drink tomorrow."
181
00:07:39,807 --> 00:07:42,026
She definitely wants me back.
182
00:07:42,070 --> 00:07:43,419
What? How do you figure?
183
00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:44,962
The Bainbridge is where
we had our first date.
184
00:07:44,986 --> 00:07:48,598
It's the most romantic spot
in our pantheon of love.
185
00:07:48,642 --> 00:07:51,340
Mm-hmm. Does your pantheonhave
a cheater's basement?
186
00:07:51,383 --> 00:07:52,341
Huh?
187
00:07:52,384 --> 00:07:53,342
'Cause she really steamed up
188
00:07:53,385 --> 00:07:54,909
the windows down there.
189
00:07:56,084 --> 00:07:59,043
That's true.
She's put youthrough a lot of polony.
190
00:07:59,087 --> 00:08:00,567
No.
No.
No.
191
00:08:00,610 --> 00:08:02,873
Okay, okay.
192
00:08:02,917 --> 00:08:05,093
Why would Jen be staying
at the Bainbridge tonight
193
00:08:05,136 --> 00:08:06,398
if she's meeting you tomorrow?
194
00:08:06,442 --> 00:08:08,096
That's a great question, Andi.
195
00:08:08,139 --> 00:08:10,664
Doesn't make any sense.
196
00:08:10,707 --> 00:08:12,448
Unless she's preparing
our love nest.
197
00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:14,276
She probably wants me
to stay over tomorrow.
198
00:08:14,319 --> 00:08:16,104
I should pack a bag.
199
00:08:16,147 --> 00:08:19,150
[stammering] Wait. Lowell,
you're making a big mistake.
200
00:08:19,194 --> 00:08:21,109
You're right. Play it cool.
201
00:08:21,152 --> 00:08:23,764
I'll wear two pairsof
underwear just to be safe.
202
00:08:25,243 --> 00:08:27,332
One dressy, one everyday.
203
00:08:30,118 --> 00:08:31,728
He's in for a world of hurt.
204
00:08:31,772 --> 00:08:33,948
Well, there's got
to be something we can do.
205
00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:35,340
Well, there was.
206
00:08:35,384 --> 00:08:37,125
Not give him back his phone.
207
00:08:37,168 --> 00:08:39,214
All right, nobody
likes that guy.
208
00:08:40,781 --> 00:08:42,347
Okay, uh... Ooh, all right.
209
00:08:42,391 --> 00:08:44,393
Don and I will go down
to the Bainbridge
210
00:08:44,436 --> 00:08:46,395
to talk to Jen
and find out her intentions.
211
00:08:46,438 --> 00:08:47,788
If she's just toying
with Lowell,
212
00:08:47,831 --> 00:08:49,398
we'll tell her
to leave him alone.
213
00:08:49,441 --> 00:08:52,183
Oh. You guys are doing
a good thing. MARCY: Yeah.
214
00:08:52,227 --> 00:08:54,771
Yeah. I just wish we didn't have
to goto the Bainbridge to do it.
215
00:08:54,795 --> 00:08:57,232
They charge ten bucks
for parking.Oh. I tell you what.
216
00:08:57,275 --> 00:09:00,017
If you drive, I'll let you pay for parking.
217
00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:01,976
That sounds fair.
218
00:09:03,238 --> 00:09:05,196
Wait a minute.
219
00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:07,285
No. That's right.Yeah.
220
00:09:10,811 --> 00:09:12,813
Hello?
221
00:09:15,729 --> 00:09:17,600
Grandpa?
222
00:09:17,644 --> 00:09:19,646
Is everybody okay?
223
00:09:22,649 --> 00:09:25,173
JOE:
Bev, if you're gonna
talk dirty, talk louder.
224
00:09:25,216 --> 00:09:27,218
You know I don't hear too good.
225
00:09:36,271 --> 00:09:38,099
MAN: Welcome to
the Bainbridge Hotel.
226
00:09:38,142 --> 00:09:39,883
May I help you? Yeah.
227
00:09:39,927 --> 00:09:42,103
We're looking for a guest
staying here... Jen Franklin.
228
00:09:42,146 --> 00:09:45,236
Ms. Franklin's bachelorette
party is in the hotel bar.
229
00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:46,629
Bachelorette party?
230
00:09:46,673 --> 00:09:48,413
Well, Jen's getting married?
231
00:09:48,457 --> 00:09:51,329
By any chance,
is she marryinga guy named Lowell?
232
00:09:51,373 --> 00:09:54,115
What kind of person has
233
00:09:54,158 --> 00:09:55,875
their ex meet her where
they had their first date
234
00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:57,137
to tell him she's
marrying another guy?
235
00:09:57,161 --> 00:09:58,902
I'm giving Jen
a piece of my mind.
236
00:09:58,946 --> 00:10:00,512
Ask if they validate parking.
237
00:10:00,556 --> 00:10:03,167
Aah.
238
00:10:04,212 --> 00:10:05,692
We're looking for Jen Franklin.
239
00:10:05,735 --> 00:10:08,303
[gasps]
The strippers are here! Oh!
240
00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:10,435
We're not strippers.
241
00:10:10,479 --> 00:10:13,134
Hold on. Let's seehow this plays out.
242
00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:15,049
You guys can't start the show
243
00:10:15,092 --> 00:10:16,746
till Jen comes down
from her room.
244
00:10:16,790 --> 00:10:19,575
Did you use a Groupon?
245
00:10:21,185 --> 00:10:24,188
Groupon? Hey, I did not come
here to get my feelings hurt.
246
00:10:24,232 --> 00:10:26,582
And if I was a stripper,
you'd be paying full price.
247
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,845
Let's go, Don.
248
00:10:28,889 --> 00:10:32,022
You just talked yourselfout
of the full Monty, lady.
249
00:10:38,463 --> 00:10:41,336
So not only does Jen not want
toget back together with Lowell,
250
00:10:41,379 --> 00:10:43,033
she's marrying someone else.
251
00:10:43,077 --> 00:10:44,948
I can't believe that.
252
00:10:44,992 --> 00:10:48,256
And in sexier news, Adam and I
were mistaken for strippers.
253
00:10:52,042 --> 00:10:53,914
I believe that.
254
00:10:55,002 --> 00:10:56,830
Thanks, baby.
255
00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:03,488
You're awfully quiet
over there, Andi.
256
00:11:04,489 --> 00:11:05,882
Huh?
257
00:11:05,926 --> 00:11:07,797
Oh, yeah, yeah,
youcan shake your moneymaker.
258
00:11:07,841 --> 00:11:10,713
Look, I-I just... I'm worried about Lowell.
259
00:11:10,757 --> 00:11:13,368
I mean, he's notgonna take this well.
Which is
260
00:11:13,411 --> 00:11:15,849
exactly why I stolehis phone to begin with.
261
00:11:15,892 --> 00:11:18,329
All right, so we'll tell
Lowell the news, and then...
262
00:11:18,373 --> 00:11:19,940
you will make him feel better
263
00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:22,594
by telling him how muchhe
means to you as a friend.
264
00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:24,161
[laughs]
I'm not doing that.
265
00:11:25,772 --> 00:11:27,904
Men don't talk about feelings.
266
00:11:27,948 --> 00:11:30,472
Lowell tells you how he
feelsabout you all the time.
267
00:11:30,515 --> 00:11:32,387
Yeah, and it's
really uncomfortable.
268
00:11:32,430 --> 00:11:34,911
I wish he'd steal
my phone instead.
269
00:11:34,955 --> 00:11:36,347
[door opens]
270
00:11:37,392 --> 00:11:38,915
ADAM: Hey, Katie.
271
00:11:38,959 --> 00:11:41,570
How was Grandpa? I don't want to
talk about it.
272
00:11:41,613 --> 00:11:43,113
Whoa, wait, what-what...
what did you...
273
00:11:43,137 --> 00:11:44,878
what did you find out?
274
00:11:44,921 --> 00:11:46,967
That you might have
a little brother coming soon.
275
00:11:53,190 --> 00:11:55,845
So, Lowell, we havesomething to tell you,
276
00:11:55,889 --> 00:11:58,718
and there... there'sno easy way to say it.
277
00:11:58,761 --> 00:12:00,981
So... Marcy, say it.
278
00:12:04,985 --> 00:12:06,638
Thank you, Andi.Yeah.
279
00:12:06,682 --> 00:12:08,075
Lowell,
280
00:12:08,118 --> 00:12:11,121
today we found out...
Andi, you finish.
281
00:12:12,644 --> 00:12:15,865
That Jen... back to you, Marcy.
282
00:12:16,910 --> 00:12:18,999
Is... Andi? Getting... Marcy?
283
00:12:19,042 --> 00:12:20,783
M...
284
00:12:20,827 --> 00:12:22,045
Andi?
285
00:12:22,089 --> 00:12:24,091
Oh, for cryingout loud. Lowell...
286
00:12:24,134 --> 00:12:25,745
Jen's getting married again.
287
00:12:25,788 --> 00:12:27,094
What?
288
00:12:27,137 --> 00:12:29,879
We're sorry that you
had to hear it from us.
289
00:12:29,923 --> 00:12:31,751
Who is she marrying?
290
00:12:31,794 --> 00:12:33,187
I looked up
her wedding registry...
291
00:12:33,230 --> 00:12:34,884
It's some guy named Ira Stone.
292
00:12:34,928 --> 00:12:35,972
Ira Stone?
293
00:12:36,016 --> 00:12:38,235
He was my divorce lawyer.
294
00:12:39,846 --> 00:12:42,283
I bet that's why she got
all your money.
295
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:47,027
What? Someone already said that?
296
00:12:49,116 --> 00:12:51,509
Why am I the one who
always gets hurt?
297
00:12:51,553 --> 00:12:53,424
When's it gonna be herturn
to cry so loud
298
00:12:53,468 --> 00:12:55,228
the neighbors call the police
because they think a cat
299
00:12:55,252 --> 00:12:56,514
is stuck in the wall?
300
00:12:58,821 --> 00:13:01,476
Oh, Lowell, I know it's hard,
but-but we're here for you.
301
00:13:01,519 --> 00:13:04,044
Yeah. We'll help
you rise above.
302
00:13:04,087 --> 00:13:06,307
Or... we can help you
sink below.
303
00:13:06,350 --> 00:13:07,830
You don't always have
304
00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,658
to be on the losing end.
305
00:13:09,701 --> 00:13:10,746
You may not be able
306
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:11,965
to get her back,
307
00:13:12,008 --> 00:13:13,836
but you canget her back.
308
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,664
You just said
the same thing twice.
309
00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:20,625
Adam is talking about the
dish best served cold.
310
00:13:21,626 --> 00:13:23,411
Jell-O?
311
00:13:24,716 --> 00:13:27,154
Revenge, Don.
312
00:13:27,197 --> 00:13:28,503
I'm talking about revenge.
313
00:13:29,460 --> 00:13:31,114
What do you think?
314
00:13:31,158 --> 00:13:32,376
Let's do it.
315
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:33,551
Nice!
All right! Attaboy!
316
00:13:33,595 --> 00:13:34,988
All right, let's get to work.
317
00:13:35,031 --> 00:13:37,164
You have Jen's e-mail
password... there's got to be
318
00:13:37,207 --> 00:13:39,166
some part of her life
we can screw up.
319
00:13:39,209 --> 00:13:40,994
You bet your bippy there is.
320
00:13:42,996 --> 00:13:44,388
I'll go home
and get the password.
321
00:13:44,432 --> 00:13:46,477
One quick cry in her
sweatshirt, and I'll be back.
322
00:13:50,307 --> 00:13:51,526
[door opens]
323
00:13:53,702 --> 00:13:55,182
I found Kate's purse
at our place.
324
00:13:55,225 --> 00:13:57,010
I guess she left
it there when...
325
00:13:57,053 --> 00:13:58,968
well, you know.
326
00:13:59,012 --> 00:14:00,970
What? I don't know.
327
00:14:01,014 --> 00:14:03,973
She caught your father and me
in a compromising position.
328
00:14:04,017 --> 00:14:05,627
[gasps]Or positions.
329
00:14:05,670 --> 00:14:08,543
I'm not sure how long
she was standing there.
330
00:14:09,631 --> 00:14:12,112
Ma, don't say "positions" to me.
331
00:14:13,069 --> 00:14:14,723
Poor Katie.
332
00:14:14,766 --> 00:14:18,074
No wonder she was askingto go to church.
333
00:14:18,118 --> 00:14:21,077
Your father's new pacemaker
has had some side effects.
334
00:14:21,121 --> 00:14:23,166
It's made him very randy.
335
00:14:23,210 --> 00:14:24,472
Okay, thanks for stopping by.
336
00:14:24,515 --> 00:14:27,170
I mean, he's like a new man.
337
00:14:27,214 --> 00:14:29,999
We haven't done some of
that stuff since Nixon.
338
00:14:31,522 --> 00:14:32,915
Seriously, you haveto stop talking
339
00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:35,004
before this whole houseturns to ash.
340
00:14:35,048 --> 00:14:36,919
Wait. I need a favor.
341
00:14:36,963 --> 00:14:39,400
Ask your dad to turn
down his pacemaker.
342
00:14:39,443 --> 00:14:41,141
A little.
Nothing dangerous.
343
00:14:41,184 --> 00:14:44,013
I just need time to
run a few errands.
344
00:14:44,057 --> 00:14:47,321
Fine. I can't do it right now.
I'm in the middle
345
00:14:47,364 --> 00:14:49,105
of something.Okay. Make it soon.
346
00:14:49,149 --> 00:14:52,326
I haven't finished a crossword
in a week... they're piling up.
347
00:14:55,155 --> 00:14:56,939
What'd your mom want?
348
00:14:56,983 --> 00:14:58,810
To ruin my day.
349
00:15:00,073 --> 00:15:01,857
Did you get Jen's password?
350
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,076
Yep. Here you go.
351
00:15:03,119 --> 00:15:04,425
Okay.
352
00:15:04,468 --> 00:15:06,166
You had to write this down?
353
00:15:06,209 --> 00:15:08,951
Well, it's just a random
jumbleof letters and numbers.
354
00:15:08,995 --> 00:15:11,562
Lowell, it's "Down2play24-7."
355
00:15:12,563 --> 00:15:16,132
I saidit's random.
356
00:15:17,220 --> 00:15:19,266
Okay, honey, sure.
357
00:15:20,267 --> 00:15:22,530
Uh, okay, I opened Jen's e-mail.
358
00:15:22,573 --> 00:15:25,925
Look, she used a travel
websiteto plan her honeymoon.
359
00:15:25,968 --> 00:15:27,752
Flight, hotel.
360
00:15:27,796 --> 00:15:30,886
It is perfectly bundledfor revenge.
361
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,235
It says "click link
362
00:15:32,279 --> 00:15:34,759
to access itinerary."Mm-hmm.
363
00:15:34,803 --> 00:15:38,285
It wantsus to do it.
It doesn't like her, either.
364
00:15:39,286 --> 00:15:40,330
We're in!
365
00:15:40,374 --> 00:15:42,158
Ah! I've always wanted
to say that.
366
00:15:43,551 --> 00:15:46,249
Jen booked two business
classtickets to Hawaii.
367
00:15:46,293 --> 00:15:48,904
Lowell, what do you wantto do about that?
368
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:52,255
I say let's move herto the back...
369
00:15:52,299 --> 00:15:54,823
Yeah. of business class.
370
00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:57,130
That way,
371
00:15:57,173 --> 00:15:59,262
when they pass outthe
freshly baked cookies,
372
00:15:59,306 --> 00:16:02,744
they won't be hot anymore,
they'll just be warm.
373
00:16:04,528 --> 00:16:06,008
Uh, okay,
374
00:16:06,052 --> 00:16:08,271
you got to dial it up
a little, Lowell.
375
00:16:08,315 --> 00:16:11,013
All right? Honey, move Jen
to the back of the plane
376
00:16:11,057 --> 00:16:12,232
next to the bathroom, huh?
377
00:16:12,275 --> 00:16:14,321
She put you in a
crappy situation.
378
00:16:14,364 --> 00:16:16,976
We're gonna do the
same thing to her.
379
00:16:17,019 --> 00:16:18,281
MARCY:
Oh.
380
00:16:18,325 --> 00:16:21,763
Click "modifyhotel reservation."
381
00:16:21,806 --> 00:16:24,026
Beachfront room? I don't think so.
382
00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:26,594
Unless we fill itwith scorpions.
383
00:16:29,423 --> 00:16:31,860
Okay, now dial it down a little.
384
00:16:31,903 --> 00:16:33,688
Huh?
385
00:16:33,731 --> 00:16:36,560
Okay, what's the worst room
in a hotel?
386
00:16:36,604 --> 00:16:38,171
Ground floor, parking lot view.
387
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:40,173
It's what we always get.
388
00:16:40,216 --> 00:16:43,263
I don't need an ocean view
when I got a Marcy view.Aw.
389
00:16:43,306 --> 00:16:45,874
That's sweet.
I thought you were just cheap.
390
00:16:45,917 --> 00:16:47,484
[chuckles]:
It's a little of both.
391
00:16:49,095 --> 00:16:50,705
Okay. All set.
392
00:16:50,748 --> 00:16:54,230
The only thing left to do
is hit "confirm changes."
393
00:16:54,274 --> 00:16:56,058
You do the honors.
394
00:16:56,102 --> 00:16:57,668
[chuckles]
395
00:16:59,496 --> 00:17:01,063
I don't know.
396
00:17:01,107 --> 00:17:02,369
What-what-what don't you know?
397
00:17:02,412 --> 00:17:04,719
Well, maybe I should
leavethe door open with Jen.
398
00:17:04,762 --> 00:17:07,809
Yeah, she's marrying anotherman,
but she cheated on me.
399
00:17:07,852 --> 00:17:09,985
She could cheaton him withme.
400
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:11,117
[groans]
401
00:17:13,336 --> 00:17:15,338
Have you learned nothing
from this, Lowell?
402
00:17:15,382 --> 00:17:17,471
Jen is a horrible person.
403
00:17:17,514 --> 00:17:19,995
She's marrying your
divorce lawyer.
404
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:22,128
The guy you paid to
sue her pants off
405
00:17:22,171 --> 00:17:23,781
took her pants off!
406
00:17:23,825 --> 00:17:26,784
Look, I have spent the last
year watching you suffer.
407
00:17:26,828 --> 00:17:27,959
I won't do it again.
408
00:17:28,003 --> 00:17:29,613
I know, I know.
Because I wasn't
409
00:17:29,657 --> 00:17:30,788
productive at work.
410
00:17:30,832 --> 00:17:32,051
No. I mean yes.
411
00:17:32,094 --> 00:17:33,400
But no.
412
00:17:33,443 --> 00:17:34,401
You just keep letting her
413
00:17:34,444 --> 00:17:36,533
take advantage of you, Lowell,
414
00:17:36,577 --> 00:17:38,231
and I can't stand it!
415
00:17:38,274 --> 00:17:40,798
Okay? I care about you.
You are part of this family,
416
00:17:40,842 --> 00:17:43,236
and damn it, we love you!
417
00:17:44,672 --> 00:17:47,501
Aw. You did it.
[chuckles]
418
00:17:47,544 --> 00:17:51,113
You yelledit, but you did it.
419
00:17:51,157 --> 00:17:54,247
Stand up for yourself
and push that button.
420
00:17:57,293 --> 00:17:59,078
I don't need to.
421
00:18:00,296 --> 00:18:03,038
I think I held onto the idea of Jen
422
00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:05,954
because I was afraidl'd end up alone.
423
00:18:05,997 --> 00:18:09,914
But then you screamed at mefrom the heart.
424
00:18:11,002 --> 00:18:12,961
Now I know I can...
425
00:18:13,004 --> 00:18:14,354
let hergo, because...
426
00:18:14,397 --> 00:18:15,703
I have you guys.
427
00:18:15,746 --> 00:18:17,052
Aw... Oh...
428
00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:19,402
That's weird. Press the button.
429
00:18:20,403 --> 00:18:21,970
Do it. Press it.
430
00:18:23,798 --> 00:18:26,105
No, okay?
We are proud of him,
431
00:18:26,148 --> 00:18:29,325
and Don and I are taking you
out to dinner to celebrate.
432
00:18:29,369 --> 00:18:31,327
That's right, but you're gonna have to pay,
433
00:18:31,371 --> 00:18:33,547
because I have no
ideawhere I left my wallet.
434
00:18:35,679 --> 00:18:38,029
[door closes]
435
00:18:39,030 --> 00:18:40,380
Thanks, Adam.
436
00:18:42,469 --> 00:18:44,166
Oh. Well, all right.
437
00:18:45,211 --> 00:18:46,908
You see what you started?
438
00:18:56,222 --> 00:18:58,311
Okay, let go, Lowell.
439
00:19:00,530 --> 00:19:03,533
My arms did, but my heart never will.
440
00:19:10,540 --> 00:19:12,063
Who talks like that?
441
00:19:14,457 --> 00:19:15,458
You love him.[stammers]
442
00:19:15,502 --> 00:19:16,677
[chuckles]
443
00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:19,984
And I love when you
showyour sensitive side.
444
00:19:20,028 --> 00:19:22,335
I think it's hot.
445
00:19:22,378 --> 00:19:25,512
Well, that's why I like you
morethan my secret second wife.
446
00:19:25,555 --> 00:19:26,513
Ah.
447
00:19:26,556 --> 00:19:28,123
[both laughing]
448
00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:32,954
Why can't any of you keep
your hands off each other?!
449
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,392
[groans]
450
00:19:36,436 --> 00:19:38,655
Let's take this upstairs.
451
00:19:38,699 --> 00:19:40,396
Absolutely.
Right behind you.
452
00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:42,529
Oh, uh,
just got to do one thing.
453
00:19:43,704 --> 00:19:45,140
"Confirm changes."
454
00:19:46,533 --> 00:19:48,622
That's for you
and your rude friends.
455
00:19:48,665 --> 00:19:50,667
"Groupon." Huh!
456
00:19:59,763 --> 00:20:01,156
Dad?
457
00:20:02,157 --> 00:20:03,680
Mom?
458
00:20:05,291 --> 00:20:08,511
This is as far as I'm coming in.
459
00:20:11,732 --> 00:20:14,169
Hello?
460
00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:16,215
I'm inside the house!
461
00:20:17,477 --> 00:20:19,653
It's okay. You-you don't
have to talk to Dad.
462
00:20:19,696 --> 00:20:21,437
I doubled up on my B12s.
463
00:20:21,481 --> 00:20:23,352
Everything's hunky-dory.
464
00:20:24,135 --> 00:20:25,267
Run along, boy.
465
00:20:25,311 --> 00:20:27,182
This is grown-up time.
466
00:20:29,576 --> 00:20:31,969
I'm never comingback here again.
33443
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